- Adrian CCSenG -

.

2018-05-11T16:38:00.000+08:00

Had never retaliated
Kept it to myself for the best of you
Refraining myself from fighting back
Though I hated your portrayal of distress and anger

I never vented it out to anybody
I cared about your opinions very much
Tried my best to meet your expectations
Reminding myself of my shortcomings I owe you

Everything was wonderful
Not anymore

beyond my threshold

2014-12-14T12:42:00.002+08:00

Loneliness
It was what I've grown accustomed to
I can live with it but never have liked it
Distaste to be left out
Distaste to be unnoticeable

It is not unusual to be left out
I don't always demand, nut when I do, I mean it.

I wish I was more selfish
I wish I was more bad tempered
I wish I was more impulsive

Adapting these characters to gain concern is definitely my last resort
Yes
I am desperate

It never had worked anyways

I never was the main show
It wouldn't matter.

To forget pain, one has to wallow in something: gaming and liquors

Unfair

2013-11-10T17:13:00.003+08:00

I changed a lot.
I tend to control my temper and tolerate more wisely.
Nevertheless, it's burdening to put on a facade of happiness when I am to be blamed, to be left out, to be treated unfairly...
It's never really me to fool around like a clown. Occasionally, I need time alone to relieve myself.
Yes, I was asked about the whys and hows. I was asked to express.
But, no, I can't.
Even if I would express, tides would turn. Eventually, it's my fault again and I would be shunned.
Indeed, it's your choice to opt to be kind with who, to be intimate with who...
No, no, no. You never would understand jealousy do occur between friends.
Is it so hard to be impartial?
The typical loser quotes: Good guys finish last / You do not have the 'look'

I tend to notice small details a lot
What's good: I appreciate little, small things
What's bad: I tend to notice small differences and it would upset me

Oh, in fact, these aren't small details
Countless occurrences were being unfair to me
When I was being quiet, nobody bothered, instead I was to be blamed for not talking with him, and not vice versa.
They would take initiatives to care about him, talk to him, but I was just beside being left out. Desperate? Be in my shoes before you speak.
He claimed to become talkative and I was to be blamed.
Walking in a bunch, ever noticed I was being left behind? No.
tapping, snapping, whispering... Yes, I'm excluded.
I wished I would have just walked away which would just make matters worse.
Yes, you did ask. So, was I supposed to answer that I was behind and ignored to cause everybody feeling guilty and trying to be nice to me after that?
NO, I do not want that to occur. It would be pointless anyway if only so would grant me concerns.
Tolerate. That's what I always do.
Sigh.
Fine. It's fine though, all I ever wanted is just some sign of appreciation.
Well, of course, we do goods not because we want something in return though. But sometimes, I just felt being toyed.

Countless times I pleaded that I never had climbed up to this class. It's better just to be alone.
Well, high school life ended anyways. Just sweep away the pain and bring along the remaining of what's good to reminisce of.

I recalled that someone had mentioned that I'm more sociable now but I never know how to express up for myself
True, I always care others more than myself.
Expressing is what you all asked me to do. In reality, what I express is what you would distaste since you never believe jealousy do occur between friendships. Oh well, you never do, everyone treats you well.

Argh. The tension level just keeps arising.
I need sports

Disclaimer: I never distaste anyone. For god's sake, it's just pure expressing. It's all up to you if you would think I am desperate when you never even take a step in my shoes.

Treasuring

2013-08-18T19:41:00.001+08:00

Being deceived is better than to deceive one

Treat others as good as you can, you never know what's coming
Learn to treasure someone who does appreciate you as much too
Treat those who treats you casual casually, not worth to venture deeper and prove something that they would not treasure anyways

Irony

Ridicule me about how I could interact so much with someone that I never met
Ironically, someone whom I knew well, talked a lot with, or even thought was my best buddies did not appreciated my existence as much as one that I never met; that irony.

Asking about not-even-close-to-lame stuff, you would ignore
Others thrust in some unfruitful words, you responded immediately
How ironic

Since you do not take me serious, I will as well treat you casually (which you probably don't care either)

When I started to whine about
They wouldn't even care (or notice?)
Somehow ones who would care, took the blames instead

Halt!

Should you be interested in other guys or even if it happened to be me (which is quite impossible)
I do not want to take interest in, at least for these few months, I've had enough of days with my spoiled mood
I can recall the days which I could not focus on class, I was mad to a certainty that I walked away with clenched fists, or I lost the sense of humour and needs of smiling
Heck, I wonder when will it all be normal again? Can I just act dumb?

Frankly
After countless incidents, I started to anticipate more, become too doubtful
I don't want my words to ruin things
That's why I'm replying late or not replying (I don't know how to respond)
Nevertheless, I will be truthful

Tingling stings

2013-07-01T02:09:00.002+08:00

Coincidences do occur occasionally, especially when you most expected it
Again, I have to tolerate the torment and act numb. Getting the best possible position to halt any possible visualization.
Definitely, there is a noticeable difference compare to the past.
Yes, I'm still reminiscing; how could I have just strolled over and sat down cracking some cliche jest...
Back in reality, my instincts knew better that I should just stay away as being acquainted, not even landing a quick glance nor even leaking depression within my expressions as I walked pass.
I need not the superficial smile you can put on with your least efforts to show your courtesy but the friendly yet rude tease that I was familiar of.
Neither I was misunderstanding nor loathing but just execrating of my lack of courage
I never knew how quickly it could deescalate

It is my nature to appear in emotionless, neutral...
Hardly, there will be any people that notice my sentimental and emotive elements.
How often have these ignorance been frequenting me? I doubted.
Was it being calm that bring me these treats : "It's okay, he will be fine", "Nah, he will not be mad"...
Indeed, I will be fine but I never have been fine with any offering of cold shoulders
I'm hardly worth of one's agitation.
It tingles my inner yet I have to portray pretense because I'm not good at these Q&A sessions—I learnt the hard way as expressing truthfully never had brought me good outcomes; somehow it have became my instincts
Perhaps, surging my ire will grant me some needed attentions—sometimes I do desperate of some pity, for the least. However, I do learn about distaste on the people that were being agitated so much.
These desperation provokes my sorrow to a greater extent.

No one was to be blamed, but myself.
I have to summon courage and cease the fear!
"Getting failures with attempts are better than getting failures with self-declared defeats." I always bear that in mind, but...where is my bravery?
Sigh.

Concern or Sympathy ?

2013-05-11T00:20:00.000+08:00

How could people be so sensitive with me
Does my gaze cause doubts? *sigh*
Has my past intention imprinted all these cautions and awareness...

It is just my sincere obligation to be anxious of you (I acknowledge of the impossibility)

There is a fine line of difference between concern and sympathy
When one treasures something, they will concern.
When something was not treasured by any, one will tend to concern; that is sympathy.

I need not be sympathized but be treasured sincerely
Save yourself some time

That radiance, that waggery . . . should remain as concealed reminiscence yet they are oppressive

Woe and sorrow

2013-04-10T21:19:00.002+08:00

Witnessing but not questioning was the worst thing I ever did...
The demolition towards fear is needed

Unable to acknowledge the present as I reminisce with remorse and penitence of how the past was gaiety and glee
Contemplating ways to retrieve
Contemplating ways to mend, may it be stitches by stitches, as long as the result will be wondrous or even miraculous

The endeavor of recalling and rebuilding the past would be the worst of my imbecility erred
Perhaps I shall learn the way to appreciate it in a different way as if every connection is unique and the interaction between may differ...yet the exchanges of mirth, they ail me

Dread of omission

2013-04-04T22:31:00.000+08:00

My inadvertence is unintentional. But, oddly, my dread of omission can only be found within you
Perhaps I had witnessed how it slays hearts of many. Perhaps I had experienced the misery and yet it traumatizes me...

The fear grows from time to time, haunting me in my slumber, tricking my consciousness yet leaving a trail within

A mad man

2013-03-21T23:45:00.001+08:00

A mad man associates violence; a mad man in calm would remain dead silence
Do not challenge the serenity of one as one is struggling within to seal his inner beast in sanity
Be observant, sharpen your words with wisdom

Do people even wonder what have evoked the demon of rage from the underground of emotions?
The jaundice.

Jaundice fenced up my inner peace, defied my inner of will to speak
I should have not committed the sin of jaundice, however, the unbearable is unstoppable

Your ring of concern which catch the crowds to be within, leaving me out of the borderline has ignited my blaze of anger triggering the jaundice, summoning the hatred...

Sympathies for him
But whose are spared for me?

I should had pulled myself out from the torment already...

Jaundice

2013-03-14T21:35:00.003+08:00

Positioning myself in between the exchanges of mirth and radiance has proven myself of achieving the next level of idiocy being an oxymoron
Please kindly inform me if concede has became a necessity to unlock my heart from the cage of torment
I simply could not bear with the gimmicks or deceptions
I'm not genius in unravel riddles, please drop the mask
As if the matter which I concern of has turned to be the fact of saddening reality, then I will play my role. I will acknowledge it.

My unbearable sins of jaundice breaking the chains to unseal my blaze of rage from time to time, however, learning the fact that unleashing my inner beast will not change the destiny of what fate had decided. The transition of envy into hatred makes no smarter choice but would have worsen the situation instead.

Learning to refine my tolerance in dealing with these unbearable matters tends to be a torture but will greatly reduce the damage that I will be facing in the future.
Ensnaring by jealousy to live within the hutch of sadness makes my heart to feel every ticking second is a suffer.

Take it or liberate it

Fallacy

2013-03-11T01:23:00.000+08:00

With the fear of having my troop of hope to be routed in rout again due to the fallacy instilled beneath my skull has certainly caused myriad stoppages to my attempts in venturing further for the chance to have you shrugged off your dreads of the unnecessary.

The nerve of enraged impetuosity can still barely be handled nevertheless. At least, I need not my eyes to suffer but my mentality has to bear with it. My heart has been through infinite roller-coaster ride; going through up and down albeit the disregard of yours.

Your conservation is indeed questioning, there is not even a room for my concern to stay on. I seems to have lost the capability to go through the barrier, or, for the saddening fact that I never had it before.

Personal thoughts

2013-01-29T01:10:00.001+08:00

Unjust demeanor is unjustified as who had brought 'moral' and define it?
"If one oversteps the bounds of moderation, the greatest pleasures cease to please" said Epictetus.
Not trying to be partricrian who shows some judgmental philosophy, but just jotting down what I have in mind now. Babble all these things out at Facebook/Twitter seems to be a boast for many. Training my sentences building at the mean time.

The judgement of achievements of one should not be judged by the acts portrayed and the possessions which seems to be emblematic to one's fortune and pride, i.e. veblen goods like horologic pieces with those refined craftmanship and precise detailing on the mechanical movements and bodyparts despite Quartz movement watches are obviously known for its accuracy, affordability, yet more functionable and easily managable. However, one with achievements deserves to possess the fortune and pride which is necessary to reward himself with. If one with bare achievement trying to pursue over the luxuries will end up suffering.

Efforts will guarantee success; Fate may guarantee efforts will not guarantee success. Unjustified outcome will evoke demonic inners of one's to achieve success as one is hankering over it. Then, many will face the worst of the worst, experiencing the downfall which may leads people far from being sane.
Your wondrous bearing intrigues against me causing chaotic tumult beneath my skull initiating the blitzkrieg of my nerves and my calmness. I have no assurance. Taking on a larghetto skirmish is my best bet, at least for now.

Needs YOUR ATTENTION!

2012-11-11T23:58:00.001+08:00

DEAR FRIENDS, my friend, Jaclyn had LOST her PET DOG, Joy. Hope that all of you will share this out to your friends and family, also be more aware of the surroundings. IF ANYONE HAPPENS TO SEE HER AROUND PLEASE KINDLY CONTACT THE NUMBER BELOW.

BREED : MALTESE
SEX : FEMALE
NAME : JOY

COAT : WHITE
LOST : 11/11/2012 (SUNDAY), AROUND 5PM.
SHE'S WEARING A REDDISH-ORANGE COLLAR WITH A TINY BELL. WOULD RESPOND WHEN CALLED HER NAME, JOYJOY.

TEL NO : 0122643336 SHIRLEY

PLEASE KINDLY HELP TO SPREAD THE NEWS ! THANK YOU VERY MUCH !

Concerns

2012-09-13T20:24:00.002+08:00

Concerning on you somehow alerts your vigilance
I'm not in a persuasion, no more...at least towards you

Words of sham
How I wish I could tell them that pertains to my anxiety truthfully without prompting your doubtful scruple

I just value you as my good friend, or perhaps a best friend---good listener with practical advises, capability of exhilarating me

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Preparation for SMM tournament delayed my plans on doing revisions & catching up my weak subjects
A month of time might not be enough for what I can do to refine my study, my grades are like shit
I'm uncertain if I can withstand against the teacher impelling me & the restraints :o
but I will try to stay on the right path :o

I hope to get scholarships & stuff, today is ain't no simple world, hard to get a work out there
I don't want to burden my family, but I also dislike how they keep brainwashing me to study the course my eldest brother did due to the benefits he is enjoying now --- full allowance on travelling, medical, insurances and stuff... =_=
I like IT stuff but not electronic engineering, it's has very few relation to each other ._.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Chances could be contingent, could be mere, but I can't afford to take the risk once more...

Realize

2012-05-24T22:39:00.001+08:00

sometimes I was so pissed off
there has been times that I felt like wanna transfer school to somewhere else
but I don't think that will displace his existence anyway

peoples just don't get me and randomly walk up to me, telling me why are you silenced in a group of people talking stuffs and bla bla
First, I don't have interest on their topic
but primarily, it's just that I don't feel like talking to him

I was trying to figure out what define true friends
well, that would be ones that aren't like him
ones that is prioritizing one's own self
disgrace ones while boasting his own dignity

signs of despair ? mmm..
-----------------------------------------------------

it has been some time that I got robbed at 1 Shamelin
the consequence of that misery incident still cripples me
the nature of fear towards stranger starts to grow inside me
I tend to start to be alert, or even run away from strangers that getting near me ._.
aiks

I still felt guilty for DD's lost ._.

-----------------------------------------------------

2 weeks of holiday, trying to get part-time
or shall I do some revision
freaking biology & history ._.

so far no fails for mid year exam rite? oh yessh :D
and..
i don't want to switch class !! ._.
not lansi

-

2012-04-13T21:35:00.003+08:00

start to find it hard to find somebody to trust
aiks

mid year exam coming soon, need to finish all my homeworks & start doing revision
but at the mean time, need to participate DotA 2 tournaments, each a week
somehow need to practice as well as coaching for another sub-group for upcoming SMM tournament
its an international event, everybody is showing effort, discovering new strategy, pairing up new combos...

glad to play with a team that we share the same interest, the courage & passion to the game :D
I feel lucky to meet you all

i want to get a part-time job, desperately need money :/

------------------------------------------

dont want to ask for more
but at least i want how it was be. . .

-

2012-04-04T00:32:00.003+08:00

don't know how to react, what to do..

mind just gone blank, i wished to talk to u..

but my mind reminds me, things weren't the same anymore..

how pathetic..

never expected such thing could happen..

idk..

i think i nid to find something to focus on..SMM tournament, studies..

if i just keep lingering around, it couldnt change much either..

sigh

sometimes when i just wanna express myself a little more, seems like it venture too far, even it wasnt meant to be like that, they somehow sense something fishy ._.

i just wanna find someone to talk, is that such an odd thing? fine..

just

wanna

punch them right on the face

for

those

who

talk nonsense crap

I'm not in the right mood to talk, how long you'd know me, you still can't get it?

---

you're still my bro

don't think too much

i'm cool with it

Persistent?

2012-02-27T23:51:00.003+08:00

don't have much free time to blog nowadays

form 4 ain't no joke, barely keeping up myself on the track ._.

I kinda afraid that I would being drop down to 4s3 because I might not attending for the exams :O

going to Korea+HK soon :X

i wanna share my trip @ china bla bla..but meh..really busy

recently, i even applied some part-time job, cashier @ Internet cafe, easy job. Play & get pay lol. and also might have some time for me to do my school stuff lol, hopefully the time shifts are flexible & they accept me !!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

recently, there's really too much thing happened around me

no matter in life or in game, it just things really frustrating me, but I didn't give up

PERSISTENT

something that I have? ha

What I believe is

since you have started it, then make it till the end whether it's going to be failed or succeeded. It's pure waste of time & it's stupid to give up half way, you never know if there's a turning point or not, don't be despair.

the guys don't even believe that we had won 6 games in a row, 2-3 of the games, they were forcing me to concede but I rejected again & again, after 10-20minutes, opponent conceded, I'm glad for that.

Sometimes when being persistent don't even pay off at all, it really makes me feel desperate & emo ._.

Why is it so hard just to buy a present ._.

I'd get into some "weird" gift shop, it's really awkward, label your shop properly la deng, there's so many kids around, aneh

I'd roamed 6-7 CC, none of them have colour-printing service, wth

then I realized just need to save the photo on pendrive bla bla

Sunday, went to KL Sentral, it's closed, hell, so I only able to give her after her birthday is over =_=

Monday, went again, rules changed, unable to put photos of celebrities on the new TnG photocard liao ._.

then I just rushed to buy a DOMO ._.

eh, please appreciate the domo leh, lol, susahnya :9

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Rejecting won't be that hurtful compare to being shun, please understand that, don't be afraid or being surprised ._.!

That feeling is really awkward & depressing.

2012-01-29T00:39:00.001+08:00

what I wished for, it will always come true, but in an opposite way...

just few more weeks to go..

but it doesn't matter anymore...

just wait again

Christmas just over, New Year coming...!

2011-12-29T19:58:00.002+08:00

Everybody just get their PMR result, choosing the streams they wanted to go now...

me? science stream, but got 0 interest in Bio, -5 interest in Account -_-

so, I opted for 4S3 and 4S1/2 ~"~

I got 7As, I was like wadafak, I thought I only got 6 or lesser, maybe my Sejarah & Chinese bla bla fails me again...

But surprisingly, finally I got A in Sejarah, just Chinese fails me again -.-

last time 6A 1B Chinese during UPSR, now PMR..duh..

Everybody got their new phone, got their present as their rewards, I got none :/

but that's fine

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24th Dec, Christmas eve, going to celebrate at the same place like last year...

but the fun, the joys were never the same anymore...

pretty pointless it's so called celebrate together, practically yeah, but truth is...separated..?

it's okay, we met new friends, we got our own fun, you wanna enjoy yourself, go ahead, don't waste our time like if you seriously wanna go out with us, then let's have fun together not like spread into what sub-groups...

Boy here, Girl there...

I don't know why, can't you all just be more considerate, tolerance bla bla...?

stop complaining all those shits please, duh...

stop holding that stupid old-school mindset of what fucking 80s ? "meh, he just wanna flirt" "meh, they just toying us around"

We all going to be 16, I don't know this is being more mature or being more fucking childish like 3 years old that always need people to keep an eye on you..

Anyway, went to countdown afterwards at Bukit Bintang area...

That was my 1st time experience (wtf you thinking? :D)

I think.. that was the time which "1 Malaysia" happens? lol

Never care who the hell are you, what nationality/race you are, just spray the hell of you, have fun..

Well, as expected, in such crowded place, robberies happen much...

Why LRT didn't extend operation hours for days like these which people will going to countdown until 12am & LRT was closed at 1130pm -_-!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

New Year is coming...

there's definitely I got lot of things that I want myself to change -_- but its like never worked :p

maybe I should be more hardworking? hmm... and maybe I should approach on you? :p

Well, I think I should, no jokes for SPM 2013...3 papers for Sejarah bla bla, hell ..

and I'm on the first batch for this shit, no reference, no last year questions, 0 clues...

What I did in holiday just playing Dotas, going out, working for few days -_-

recently found a Gym Rakyat, RM2 only for students o.o

it's located at Kompleks Sukan, just only available for students on Friday & Saturday...

been there with Dennis, Xin Hau... :p

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[DotA talk]

once again, Icefrog released new version during Christmas

First few days, I not quite like it though, I felt the heroes are over imbalanced, but then, don't give a fuck...

So imo, the most imba heroes are still SD & batrider :P

Roof, TB, Tuskarr in -cm pools now..

tuskarr could be some strong ganker but not can't do a shit in teamfight..

roof sux at laning, pretty good in teamfight though

TB strong carry throughout the game :9

been trying some heroes nowadays...

the buffs towards some items & the introduces of new items seems like magic carries arise once again... :9

Holiday~Christmas coming~

2011-12-09T20:38:00.002+08:00

In this holiday..

I've been to DotA tournament, we lost though, but we as a team only played 2 -cm mode game before we participate this tournament, so we pretty much learned a lot...

Why is it not boring to play DotA for years is because every game is different, your play style required to change, facing different lineups, you have to counter with different ways...

A little mistake will make you pay

Anyway, I've also been to working as promoter for P1 4G (just last week :P) & waiter

3 days @ KLCC PC Fair

learned alot

做sales就是要~~不择手段~~*ahem* i mean 想尽办法来拉客

work for 3 days but I only successfully sold out a broadband plan ._.!

I also worked as waiter at Cheers Palace (opposite Leisure Mall)

第一天就要学什么招牌上菜仪式 =.=|

好才没有无聊人难为我 :p

Peoples who are working will advise you enjoy your study life

Working life is worse than study life, it's true :p

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Just now go Times Square, sungai wang & BB area find job

all require 16 at least ._.!!

every day at home watch dota replay else play dota, wanted to play -cm clan war more ._. but always got ppl no on9

PMR result coming out soon...

if nobody post this on status, I even forgotten about PMR stuff lol

Science or Art stream? IDK :D

but most likely i think i would choose science stream :/

Christmas coming soon, any plan? :P

=================================================

Is this a chance? :/

life's complicated

2011-10-24T03:48:00.004+08:00

well I'm not gonna update neither for the Melaka trip nor the iceskating day 1st..

I will just update recent things about me...

Either in life or dota. . .

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Life:

"Be proactive not reactive"

That day I read a book in Popular bookshop at Sunway there after having dinner with buddies, I not really remember the title but it something like this...<7 Habits of Teenager should have> ?

but well idk...just 7 habits...

eventhough I didn't finish read the book, I just read it like less than an hour...

but I learnt a lot from that...

for me, most notable would be that "be proactive not reactive"

What's that?

-You will never escape from criticizing, comparison, harassing, bashing or just some sort of that that gotta makes you upset, rage bla bla...

How will you react?

Be reactive- He flames me first, I gotta flame the fuck out of him back!

Be proactive- He flames you doesn't mean you should do what's naturally you need to react----flame him back. No, as you know that won't help but just causing endless chaotic. Maybe you could had do something more productive at the mean time?

I mean don't let such stupid criticizes affect you easily, do what you have to, but not something stupid..

Quarrel is not gonna help

----------------------------------------------------------------

DotA:

It so does in DotA

"oh you noob, look at your items bla bla bla"
*Yes! I'm a tiny! time for revenge & tosses that flamer to the horde of your enemy team*

great, you just feeding enemy team more

instead you should had been realizing...

Oh maybe he's right, I should had bla bla bla...

even he's wrong, just ignore him or tell him kindly & explains not doing some betrayal moves, that just dumb

=========================================

We were close

We are worse than acquaintances

I think you were once my very very close friend to me

You were quite nice and you were really different...

I don't know where I got the nerve & started trying to get you

but things doesn't seems ended well

even until now...

yes, I'm stupid, that was a dumb move

I had even pm-ed you whether can we still be just friends,

and you never replied,

as things seems so awkward, I decided to remove you from buddy then...

recently, I think I should had retrieved back this friendship, at least, it shouldn't had been worse than acquaintances...

that day, it really proved everything that is really had gone worse than acquaintances

You were helpless, I was thought of giving a hand, but well, since you were totally ignoring me, then I just get my ass off..

What can I react when there's her, somebody that worse than acquaintances talking with all your close, good friends...

I chose just to shut the fuck myself then

I really had nothing to say when she's around, idk, not saying that I hate her or wut...

I looked at you, I waved at you, I greeted "bye bye"

but you just changed your gaze to somewhere else, totally ignoring me...

conclusion:

in the net, without seeing face to face, you ignored

in real, face to face, you ignored either

nothing I can do then...

I think it's really pointless to retrieve it back, so well, move on...

anyway, I'd learnt a lot of my mistakes from her...

but oh well, can't change the facts anymore...

Worse than acquaintances

-------------------------------------------------------------

Today I saw all the quarrels going around in the DotA group,

Leon removed the post afterwards

I know what mistakes I'd done, I'm not a real good player, I'm over aggressive

But if you really wanted to join, you just tell, I would give you my slot if you really were a better one since you would surely have more experience with Leon & they all, but there's no point of playing hints & offensing each other

I'm not trying to defend myself or what, I'm just saying if you really a better one, why the hell he picked me instead of you?

considering he's your schoolmate & definitely could work it out much better in terms of coordination, right?

Every day, I spent hours on watching replay, analyse each pick/ban choices, researching on the mechanism...

because I wanna try to help Leon out on drafting those shits in case he left out something & end up doing a wrong decision

Still, I'm practicing for what I can to give my team more advantage

I practicing jungling so that I could give my team more solo lane & level advantages

I practicing supports because you guys had better skills & patience in farming, last hitting

I not getting a single fucking creep score because I know who need it more than me, so you think I really meant to feed?

I mean feeding? what the hell? I threw everything that I got & I think that what a support, caster should do, doesn't it ?

Are you gonna rice farming VS in the jungle for a mekansm? really?

Idk wth you criticizing me, man

I think if you really concern about how much this team meant to you, then you should had giving advices, teaching me

not giving the team more trouble

you knew how much the time you wasted for the quarrels? that would almost cost for a game & short discussions

I respect you, I never knew you were holding a grudge on me or something

Anyway, my tournament will be on 5th & 6th November...

@ SMKSBS

its pretty soon but training will still be an issue to us

it's hardly to gather all 5 of us playing together

even just few of us playing together will not much helping

most of the time, the game will be screwed up by some other stranger pub players

I thought of training with AI, but that's work on training last hit which I don't need, I'm supporter -_-"

Oh well, I think I should stop typing my dota shits now before it getting rid of you all

lols

================================

Enjoy the holidays

Don't care about the PMR Result, don't need to bother about checking the marks now

Just wait for the result slip instead & now have fun :3

feel good after releasing all my shit feelings out -_-

PMR-trip-DotA tournament?

2011-10-01T01:45:00.002+08:00

I keep silence doesn't mean I'm emo or some sort of that shiats

I just trying to concentrate doing my works, doing my revisions...

If you finished your works, or you don't feel you need to do so...

at least, think of the others... :/

it's really annoying & giving me a hard time in Chinese block teaching...

I really can't think & do...

(I didn't mean to mention who by specifically)

Come on, it's PMR around the corner... :|

After few months, I still feel like...er..idk..

I would like to stay @ B class better...

A class is nutz & much noisy :X

oh well, 3 days left...

don't be too stress, pushing yourself too hard doesn't make things better either ..

--------------------------------------------------------

I thought all the plan were planned well fine after PMR

13 14 trip, then 15 16 go DotA tournament

but ....

who knows...

trip is on 14-15

which is directly clash on the 1st day tournament :/

so me & dd can't make it...

now having a trouble finding replacements...

sigh :|

--------------------------------------------------------

oh well...

after PMR, find part-time job :D

and another thing to think of is...

science stream or art stream or wut?!

I had already thought of what I wanted...

IT stuffs...

but...

science streams seems like...err...nthg related & I hate bio -.-

oh wai...PMR haven't over yet :/

--------------------------------------------------------

2 times liao

ur bday

oso can't help u celebrate :/

next time & next time & next time.?

23/7 - Alex birthday

2011-08-28T15:06:00.005+08:00

oh well...
i really lazy updating blog liao :O

this was a month ago :O
well, but it still a happy memory that worth mentioning, doesn't it?
who's in the party?
Boys: alex, me, dennis, yu keen, jun kuan, xinhau
Girls: ky, erin, jaclyn, liy hui, jing, pei yei, hui xin
-------------------------------------------------------------------
went to Jusco left search right search for his presento with dennis
all over budget...then...
bought a white Polo T..
we think that will pretty fit for him :P
as we noticed he wore Polo Ts quite often during times hanging out with him...
==============================
go to his house...
nothing to do...
roam around & noticed a interesting thing...
electric bill
[Jumlah perlu dibayar - RM 9xx.xx]
and it end up to be a hot topic in the party :P

ridiculous...my house electric bill just 1/10 of that =-=
air-cond so mahal kah?

tben he went out for buying ingredients for steamboat
==============================
@ house, we watched a singapore movie <鬼也笑>
rofl @ the story 2 - 鬼才嫁给你
the guy was actually the ghost bride
so fugly :O

then then then...
we go play his computer & see the history again...
the list is so long..i suggest just simply write a word that might consist those things...
most simple: xxx
and it comes out tons of result LOL

& oso found a crossbow thingy to play :P
===============================
alex back~ along with yu keen ..
hmm...yu keen styled his hair, not bad not bad..
but still so cool =-=|
like a freaking zombie.

we unpacked & washed all those stuffs by ourselves :D

epic failures happened here...
we put the electrical stove upside down & almost burn up the whole table lol
===============================
play blackjack and drink beers & wines
my tin of beer is tasteless =-=|
wine is better! :D

then go play mahjong...
wut? we din gamble..
这是华人的传统文化 =3=
kita harus amalkan, so we will always go play liao xD

walao! mahjong is harder to play than poker cards all those shiat...
but we learned it after few rounds ..
left us 4 (alex, me, dennis & xinhau) play till midnight 2-3am (i forgot but its midnight)
and i won the last game :P
gai wu AH!
===========================
alex sleep @ other room, we stayed @ his room...
we talk cock sing song play ping pong ding dong door blame king kong till midnight 4-5am
i think...

question of all times: who's bigger? LMFAO
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
these days, my brother gave me 3 pair of shoes & tons of belts @@
then just now go tesco buy liao 2 jeans & a pants which is more like formal ones...
each pair of jeans/pants just rm10 =3=

i tak kisah brand apa...looks nice wear comfy then can liao =3=
[tomorrow put photos]

so,
are you fanboys fangirls of a/certain brands? or you don't care about the brands but how it looks (like me)? :D
you can answer @ the comments section or chatbox section

!!TRIAL EXAM!!

2011-07-30T02:09:00.003+08:00

Yeah, time's flying

few more days (3rd August)
then it will be trial exam

I think it's enough of having fun,
time to study for this exam liao...

not every time is lucky
This doesn't mean I'm saying that I feel previously exams all are easy & I'm lucky to score 'em
:O

well,
just a quick update & informing you all that I will not be online for 2 weeks until this trial exam ends...

I will be back with Alex's birthday post :D