Life is so funny.

The other day I recalled that I’d shifted away from my 100 Days of Peace practice a few months ago, and I was curious if I was still within those 100 days. In addition, I didn’t even remember the particular focus I’d chosen.

So this morning I visited this blog and just had to laugh. You’ll understand as I explain what I’ve been doing for the past two months.

As I mentioned in my previous post, I’d shifted my focus to love. In that time, I attended a workshop at the magical Esalen retreat center called “Opening to Oneness through Love.” I won’t even try to describe the experience; suffice to say it was amazing. (Go to Esalen now. Yes, now.)

To stay in touch with many of the people I met there, I rejoined Facebook. So Facebook suddenly became a place for me to share my insights about my personal growth, much like this blog used to be. One of the insights I had was that a loving gift I could give to myself each morning was to create an uplifting and energizing Power Hour. I did, and I began reporting on Facebook each morning as I completed it.

Today was the 25th consecutive morning I completed my Power Hour.

So when I returned to this blog and discovered my 100 Days of Peace had been focused on Humble Discipline, I cracked up. How funny that love led me right back to my original intention — to report every day on my progress with my daily disciplines. The only thing different was the form it took.

The other funny thing is that my current Power Hour has been more ambitious AND easier to stick to than the one I’d previously created here. Instead of starting at 7 AM, I start between 6 and 6:30. Here are the details:

• Opening to Oneness through Love meditative exercises
• Bouncing and lymphatic breathing
• Egoscue physical exercises (from The Egoscue Method of Health through Motion)
• Pushups
• Skin brushing and affirmations
• Running

It feels incredible, and I can’t believe I’ve been doing this for 25 consecutive days. One of the advantages of Facebook over this blog is that I get frequent encouragement. This blog is not really designed for that. And I didn’t anticipate how powerful that encouragement is. If any readers want to follow my progress on Facebook, you can use this link:

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1100382886

I’m not sure how this blog will fit into my practices, if at all. I’d hoped to create a community of 100 Days of Peace practitioners, and that didn’t manifest. It’s okay. Life has a flow to it, and it’s not always what we think it will be. 

To those of you who have supported me through this blog, many thanks. I hope you can join me on Facebook. You rock!

As is obvious from my absence from this blog, my focus has shifted away from disciplines.

I’ve been exploring a fear of premature death that I believe is a manifestation of unresolved feelings about my friend Scott who died last year. I don’t want to die, and I don’t want to live a dead life of fear. I want to feel alive.

I’ve also been exploring some resistance I have to being loved. I am comfortable being the one who loves, and I gravitate to situations where I can do that without the risk of being loved back. But being Love (which is a practice I try to embrace as often as possible) includes both being loving and being loved, the cycle of giving and receiving.

I still hold open the space of this 100 Days of Peaceful Discipline. And I may post again when/if my focus shifts back.

I over-scheduled myself this past week. As a result, my disciplines took a bit of a hit.

It’s been a full week since I last posted. My morning skin-brushing and affirmations vanished for most of that week. I’ve been sensitive to when I get to bed, and though it’s often after 10 PM, I do meditate once I’m there.

Regarding last Monday’s cleanse, I was almost 100% successful. My dinner was a veggie burger at a restaurant–the bun and cheese (and some fries) were not cleanse-friendly. But it definitely helped to have the food in the house for the earlier part of the day.

I’m going to do some food prep today for tomorrow’s cleanse today.

I’ve also been having trouble sleeping because I have so much on my mind. That makes it more challenging to get up and get started in the morning. Over time, the meditation will likely help with that.

So although I got a little off track this week, I’m learning about what supports my disciplines and what doesn’t, which is all part of this 100 Days experience!

Late nights this weekend, but lots of fun. I was more relaxed with my disciplines as a result.

I’m fully stocked and ready for my Monday cleanse tomorrow. It’s 10:30 now, and I’m going to bed to meditate as soon as I finish this post.

Listening to Ajahn Brahm tonight, I was reminded of his practice of acknowledging what he loves and values in himself as he meditates. That will be my focus tonight.

Last night I was searching
Searching for something
Searching for action
Some satisfaction

If there had been alcohol or junk food in the house…well, let me tell you I’m happy there wasn’t. I settled for an egg sandwich and a horror movie. Needless to say I did not get to bed at 10 PM. Which of course delayed things this morning.

The good news is that I completed my disciplines, if not at the time I intended. And I learned that I have a mindset of wanting to end the day with a treat of some kind. Something satisfying.

Satisfaction is definitely the right word. It comes from Latin meaning “to make/do enough,” and that’s exactly the feeling I have. I don’t want to end the day (i.e. go to bed) until I feel like I’ve done enough, until I feel like I’ve enjoyed something special. “Yes, it was a good day. And now I can go to bed.”

But really, what can one do at the end of the day? Is a cookie (or twenty) going to fill whatever emotional hole is craving satisfaction? No, that’s why there’s all that searching.

I’m now conscious of it and will acknowledge it for what it is when it shows up again… Tonight?

Evenings are challenging me.

Last night I stayed up later than 10, consciously pushing it off. “Another 15 minutes, another 15 minutes.”

There was something I was seeking, some sense of finality. Some sense of “Okay, that’s a great way to cap off the day.” I would like my meditation to be that, but often it’s not. The meditation can be frustrating when my mind is racing. Maybe I could change it to make it more appealing. Add a sense of sacredness, like soothing music, or a candle, or some incense.

New Discipline: 7 AM Power Hour

I started a new discipline today that I’m calling my 7 AM Power Hour (thanks to Anthony Robbins). It will include skin-brushing, affirmations, and physical exercises. Maybe even a short walk. I did 30 minutes this morning because I had a telephone coaching client at 7:45. Wednesdays will typically be a shorter version.

Here’s a quick recap of my experience with humble discipline in the first week:

10 PM Meditation

This has been largely a success. On days when I do not have late evening plans (most mid-week days), I’m quite conscious of the 10 PM structure. Even if I don’t actually get to bed until 10:30, the 10 PM structure is supporting me by increasing my awareness of the choices I’m making in the evening and how they affect my bedtime.

Monday Health Cleanse

Today I was unprepared like last week. I’m aware that for this to work consistently, I need to make it easier by having cleanse-friendly foods in the house. And having a meal plan could help, too. Here’s my first draft:

• Green drink
• Fruit for breakfast
• Fresh vegetable juice, quinoa, and steamed spinach for lunch
• Big raw salad and steamed broccoli for dinner
• Snack: sliced cucumbers

Skin-brushing and Affirmations

Most days I do this in the morning, but rarely upon waking as is my intention. This is an opportunity for more attention.

Daily Blog Reporting

This is the lowest of priorities on this list of disciplines, and as such, it’s the least consistent. Not having a routine for when exactly I intend to post (morning, mid-day, evening) makes it more challenging. This week I will play with an evening routine; maybe link it to the 10 PM meditation.

If you’ve seen the “Serenity Now!” episode of Seinfeld, you can infer the inflection in my voice as I conjure George Costanza and declare, “Humility Now!”

The success is that I have not lost sight of any of the disciplines I’m announced on Day 1.

The challenge is the timing. My old habits are pushing against the new ones. Old habits fighting for their lives. Instead of fighting back, I’m observing, thanking the old habits for their input, and fitting the new ones in as best I can.

Case in point: I haven’t skin brushed yet today and it’s already mid-afternoon. My habit of jumping into my projects and putting off routines is strong today. “Okay, thanks for sharing.”

I’m signing off now to do my skin brushing…

The Monday health cleanse was challenging, due in large part to the spontaneity of my commitment. I was not prepared with the right foods, so although my dinner was very healthy, it was not technically “cleanse-approved.”

I’m enjoying the 10 PM meditation. It gets me to bed much earlier than I’d gotten used to. It’s also a relaxing way to end the day.

I did the skin brushing and affirmations, and I ran.

Regarding my feelings around these disciplines, I feel committed without any strong emotions either way.

To begin these 100 Days of Peaceful Discipline, I start with an excerpt from my upcoming book, Peaceful Productivity:

To use your systems and structures most effectively, you must be motivated by a sense of humble discipline. You must take your ego out of the equation. You don’t follow your systems because doing so makes you better or not doing so makes you worse. You don’t follow your systems because doing so is right and not doing so is wrong. You simply follow them because you’ve chosen to.

The discipline to follow your systems comes from a deep faith in the power of choice, a deep sense of personal responsibility. In that faith and responsibility is humility. By contrast, imagine a choice made from arrogance. How powerful of a choice is that? When you do something out of a feeling of superiority, you are giving away some of your power to whoever or whatever you’re feeling superior to because you’re reacting to it. In fact, arrogance is both reactive and non-present. Arrogance is a story in your head about why and how you will prove yourself better than other people by making some choice. But when you’re controlled by such stories, you can’t make powerful choices.

When you choose to commit to a discipline humbly and not arrogantly, you are choosing to have an experience. For example, in writing this book, I chose to commit to an intense writing schedule for three months. Not because it would make me better than anyone else, and not because other strategies for writing are worse or wrong, but because I wanted to have the experience of immersing myself in the writing. I wanted to find out what it felt like and what I could create at the end of that experience. And the only way to know that was to do it.

When you make the discipline about having an experience, it’s no longer personal. The choice is clear: To have the experience you must stick to the commitment. You’re not bad if you don’t. You simply won’t have the desired experience. And because you define the experience for a specific limited period of time, you also side-step the all-or-nothing pitfall.

Bring this mindset of humble discipline to your systems and structures. When you design them, do so with the understanding that they will give you an experience. Only after you’ve had the experience can you say if it served you or not. Assuming you can know what will work and what won’t before you try it is arrogant, as is assuming you know how a month-long discipline will feel after only having done it for a day or two. Be humble in your disciplines, structures, and systems. Take your choices seriously without making yourself right or wrong for those choices, and you’ll feel more empowered and committed in those choices.

Some of the disciplines I am choosing for the next 100 days are:

• 10 PM meditation before bed
• Monday health cleanse (fruits and vegetables only)
• Skin brushing and affirmations in the morning
• Daily reporting on this blog

If anyone wants to join me in adding a humble discipline to your life for the next 100 days (or some shorter time frame), please comment on this post.