This chorus has been going through my head for several days. I think the song is about him losing his mind, whether I am correct or not, I feel like this at times.

I mentioned in my last post that I didn’t think I could call myself a Christian anymore. That statement needs to have more clarification and I’m not sure I can do that at this time. I do know that I do not consider myself as your typical evangelical, right-wing conservative Christian. I’m more into looking at what Jesus said and doing it.

My problem is… do I really believe Jesus is the son of God who died for me and then rose again from the grave. Do I really believe that? At one time I did. Now, I’m not so sure. Hubby and I were talking about this and we are on a quest to read other historical documents to see what they say about Jesus. Also, I am going to read my bible to see what it really says. To read it as a historical document and not having any past teachings influence my research.

Basically, I want to go to the beginning, I want to look at the history, I want to make my own decision and not rely on what others are telling me what I should believe. I’m not exactly sure where to start but then again that’s part of the fun.

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So I’ve been thinking and I’ve come to realize that I don’t know what I believe. I used to call myself a Christian and quite honestly, I don’t think I can do that anymore. I don’t know what happened and I don’t know what’s changed.

I was thinking about some of my other posts and thought about deleting them but decided to keep them. That was me at that time even though it is no longer me now. Who am I now? Well, I’m still trying to figure that out. I am a lot more liberal in my political views than I realized (and I’m not going to go into here so don’t ask).

I’m also a lot more free than I was before. I’m not sure how I am more free but Hubby has noticed it also and we think it’s a good thing. Maybe it’s because my kiddos are getting older and don’t need me as much so I am able to do more things for me.

Anyway, I don’t even know if any of this makes sense. I do know that I am evolving as a person and am curious to see where I end up.

Thanks for listening. You can go back to your day now.

Photo credit: Vincepal

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Psychology

Photo credit: Joe Crawford (artlung)

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Wading Through History

I finished my first semester of college after not having courses for over ten years. I loved it! I only took two classes, history and sociology. I’m now in the process of waiting to see what my grades my are. I did fairly well but would like to see it in real life before I allow myself to believe it.

I found out I love history. I want to know more. I was sad my history class ended. The coolest part of taking history was discussing it with my 10 year old son. He loves to watch the military channel and has been interested in World War II, since I recently studied it I’ve been able to share a bit with him. Now he is working his way to the Vietnam War and wants to talk to his grandfather about it since Poppy was in the navy during the war.

My son and I are having conversations that don’t involve Pokemon, Avatar: The Last Airbender, or Yu-Gi-Oh! I love it! It’s exciting to see him interested in something other than his video games.

Photo Credit: The Wandering Angel

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Sociology: The Institution of Marriage

Photo Credit: foundphotoslj

Both subjects are fascinating!

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I was going to write a lovely post but was informed by Hubby that I should go to bed. It was past midnight and we both know that I am cranky if I don’t get enough sleep.

Since he is so smart and always right, I am going to follow his advice and go to bed. I love you all and am thankful you continue to read this blog even though I’m not posting as often.

Photo Credit: Photos8.com

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Follow them on Twitter, @collective_soul. They actually follow back and interact with their fans.

They are my all time favorite band. Their album, Youth, is what I listen to in the car. The only other CDs I listen to in the car are No Doubt and the Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs but my absolute favorite is Youth.

I now leave you with my favorite Collective Soul song, Him. (If you want to see Part 1 it’s their Hollywood video.)

This post was written as an entry to Collective Soul’s blog contest that ended June 15, 2009. I’m late so my entry doesn’t count. That would have required me to pay attention to the rules and that’s too difficult for me. However, I was going to post the Him video anyway, so I did.

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First target:

Second target:

Different gun: I didn’t do as well.

I’m still sorting through the emotions of that experience. To be holding a piece of machinery that could kill or seriously hurt someone was scary.

Now my emotions are now running all over again. I typed this post, inserted my pictures, and previewed it to see how it looked. That’s when I saw my “Related Posts” section. The post it brings up is Jeremy Moore (a local pizza delivery man who was killed so someone could have free pizza).

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Hubby has some vacation days he has to use or lose.

I had dreams of going to a cabin, hanging out, hiking, reading, and relaxing in nature.

Reality set in and we realized that wouldn’t be possible.

Hubby took a couple of days off from work so we could have an extra long weekend, hang out with friends, visit with some family…

I looked at my school schedule to see what homework and tests I have coming up.

Yeah. I won’t be relaxing. I will be studying. Yay me.

Photo Credit: MeaganJean

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