1 step beyond

Teasing You

2009-09-10T16:49:00.003-05:00

A Cartoon About It

2009-08-27T07:07:00.001-05:00

Who Knew?

2009-08-10T10:21:00.003-05:00

It's official, I'm going back to school.

I don't know if it'll work out. I don't know if I'll stay with it. I don't know how I'll do. I know I do need a career change, but the age factor is staring me in the face. I'm fairly sure I can do the work involved, I'll have a light course load at nights until I see how it goes. But I will also keep my job.

Not the only one who ever did this, I know, but it's groundbreaking for me.

So I don't know what happens now, here, with all this bloggy stuff. I can't imagine what's going to be happening for the next few years is going to be all that interesting, and I have no idea what's about to happen to my time.

I won't let it deter my "hobby" of doing fiction work, and the model train target for Christmas is still in my sights. But everything else is up in the air.

You've probably already noticed my pull back from the internet abyss. Yeah. Me too. But there ya go. Life happens when you're not watching.

I have no idea what is next.

What's New/

2009-08-04T09:48:00.005-05:00

I'm tired of trying to penetrate the defenses, considerations, walls and facades people put out there. I think I'll sit back and let people try to penetrate mine for a while.

20 Things I've Always Wanted To Say To You

2009-07-16T16:40:00.003-05:00

Where I attempt to do this meme wherein you say 20 things to people but without saying who they are and, per this new twist somebody put on it, be positive and nice and friendly and shit. Instead of the usual ranting bully routine people usually use this meme for.

I shall endeavor, Ahem... (in best Pope voice, he proceeds...)

1. If you got that broccoli out of your teeth you'd be so pretty.

2. Um, no, we heard the fart, actually.

3. After seven vodkas you're absolutely stunning.

~~4. How many times are we supposed to fix the same damn problem for you, day after day after day?~~ (EDIT) NO NO NO. Not it. Damn it. DAMN it.

5. You're better than the best drunk I've ever put on, you just only don't give yourself the chance to see yourself in that rosy hued mirror somewhere in my imagination between the ages of rocks and the tallies from the last horseracing season. My friend.

6. I'm glad you like where you live. ~~I think it sucks to be you but I'm trying to be nice.~~ SHIT!!

7. If I was thirty years younger, unmarried, and a GIRL then yeah, OK, whatever you say. ~~Until then, Jesus dude, put a lid on it.~~

8. I wish this was ten things I like about you instead of twenty, because I honestly can't think of twenty. I mean, seriously.

9. You have the qualities of a bandage.

10. You don't need to hang on to the past, you're good just like you are. You're better than any of your memories.

11. I wish I knew that you knew that I knew that you knew just exactly how much I love you.

12. Please stop trying to kill yourself. Seriously, what the hell?

13. Don't have that second child. God, circumstances, and your own instability (which you hide so well) all point to the one beautiful child you already have as like, you know, IT.

14. I love it when you pull my finger.

15. And you, over there? You can pull anything I got.

16. Berlin does "Live To Tell" a hundred times better than stupid Madonna and you know it.

17. I'm different on the intertubes than a lot of guys. I don't have "blog-wives", I have blog-daughters, and that's how I like it - and why I like you.

~~18. In a word? Shutup.~~ But you're better than that so...

19. ~~You don't have to make fun of innocence to feel good about yourself. So why do you?~~ I mean... your potential is much greater than what you give yourself credit for. Cough... coughcoughcough.

20. I know you don't like passive-aggressive. That's why you're so easy to touch off. But you're better than that so...

------------

Hey. I did my best. Live with it.

I Don't Know What I Made For Supper Tonight

2009-07-14T19:07:00.005-05:00

I was going to do chicken-kabobs, but at the last minute I moaned (unto myself) "y'know the problem is sometimes the chicken is done before the veggies and you end up burning the damn veggies. Unless of course you sautee the veggies first just a little." So then I says "wull Jeez if I'm going to sautee these veggies so they're nice and tasty-bite-able when the chicken is done I may as well just put the whole thing in a wrap and cook it all together." So that's what I did.

Except I really didn't have a recipe or anything. I just kind of winged it, and it turned out to be grill-er-icious. I was just as surprised as anybody. But I guess all this cooking has kind of taught me some basics, enough to make me dangerous anyhow.

So here's the deal. I don't know what this is. I'll make it for whoever comes up with the best name. How's that?

Skinless, boneless chicken cut into small strips marinating in some balsamic vinagrette.

Boiling some fresh (organic) carrots. JUST FOR A LITTLE because you don't want them all gloppy after they're in their foil later. Just get them started so that they and the chicken arrive DONE at the same time.

Ditto for some orange bell peppers. Hmm... the theme is kind of orange-colored. Hmmmm. Anyway these are just started to sautee in some olive oil and cracked black pepper. Don't get them all the way soft, you're just giving them a head-start for later.

Fresh mushrooms from the produce dept., all chunked up. No pre-prep but the chopping.

Spring onions, just chopped into chunks. No pre-prep. They enter the foil like this, just like the mushrooms.

Ditto cherry tomatoes.

Here's the whole thing, chicken and all (discard the stuff the chicken was marinating in) sitting on tin foil just before I close it up and head it out to the grill outside.

Then, on a bed of fresh (organic) spinach lightly littered with feta cheese and sprinkled with more balsamic vinagrette, after 20-25 minutes at @ 400 on the grill you get this.

Recommended verbiage- 1 shot of vodka + 1 shot of blackcurrant liquer + 1 cube of ice.

Eat.

I have to tell you, it was great. But what the heck was it???? I have no idea what to call this.

=====================
1 orange bell pepper
3 carrots
2 good-sized skinless, boneless chicken breasts
2 spring onions
4 fresh mushrooms
4 cherry tomatoes
spinach, peppered with feta cheese
balsamic vinagrette

The problem with blogs....

2009-07-09T17:17:00.000-05:00

...is that just because you have one doesn't mean you're all that.

No, the train isn't forgotten

2009-07-01T17:25:00.002-05:00

We're working on the scenery right now and once I get some spray paint more will be coming.

But I wanted to point out the greatness of Google...

Months afterwards, a fellow model railroad fanatic enters the site from a Google search and weighs in on my work.

That's right here in the comments.

As a newcomer to the hobby I am DYING for expertise, and this fellow seems to have done his homework. Problem is he signed on blank with no account. I just hope he comes back.

On The International Message Board

2009-06-25T08:33:00.003-05:00

The Fars News Agency, Iran's captive "news" outlet has quoted President Ahmadinejad's response to President Obama saying he was "appalled and outraged" by the crackdown of Iranian protesters.

I think I've been connected to the internet too long. Specifically connected to discussion sites and message boards from the days of my youth, because looking at Ahmadinejad's response I can't help but be reminded of the kind of stuff that often gets posted there when people are 9000 miles away from one another and basically faceless. It looked like this to me, and the words I'm going to use are the exact quotes from Iran's tough guy as quoted by Fars. I kid you not. Would I lie?

Obama_FTW: i think it's terrible what's happening in iran. peaceful and free protest shouldn't be answered with arrests and beatings by the government, anywhere in the world.

Hoochiegurl: uh-oh. Wait until the Iranian guy sees that, O.

Shi'a-Pet: Obama made a mistake to say those things. Our question is why he fell into this trap and said things that previously Bush used to say.

RW: hahahahaha, there he is right on cue! @Shi'a-Pet, do you liek mudkips?

Obama_FTW: i'm just being honest. i'm seriously appalled and outraged over this. Those pictures of that girl that was killed in the streets... it's heartbreaking.

Shi'a-Pet: Do you want to speak with this tone? If that is your stance then what is left to talk about I hope you avoid interfering in Iran's affairs and express your regret in a way that the Iranian nation is informed of it.

anonymous: lolwut??

Shi'a-Pet: No point in talking to Washington unless the U.S. president apologizes.

Obama_FTW: omg.

RW: ME ME ME! I'll apologize- Dear Supreme Mullah Woolly Bully. I'm sorry Ahmadinejad is a doofus.

Yeah. I've spent altogether too much time on the internet in my life.

The Longer You Look...

2009-06-23T10:18:00.004-05:00

EDIT TO ADD:
OK so I just got this email telling me that this posting is completely inappropriate and insensitive to folks who are being repressed by terrorists and their brutal regimes. I'm not going to publish the email, nor will I answer it because I think it's either completely bogus or the work of somebody who really needs to have their head examined.

I don't see why I should have to explain this. I laughed my head off. It's called humor. Sheeesh.

EDITED FURTHER TO ADD...
I can't believe I'm doing this...

2009-06-21T12:42:00.000-05:00

It's A Quality Of Life Issue

2009-06-17T08:10:00.003-05:00

I think people, as in nations, get the culture they deserve. I wonder about the mechanisms that propel certain people into the spotlight. How is it we get so many borderline sociopaths achieving positions of influence and sway in this country? I wonder what it is, exactly, about the American character that gives us this phenomenon of seeing perfect assholes become figures of national recognition.

The sad fact here is that - in real terms - it's the "people" who determine what is popular and topical and who is allowed a position of national recognition and who isn't. Us. We decide who is worthy of watching or not. This very article contributes to it because of the very topic itself. But - looking at the particular components that make up the pantheon of our cultural symbols - what does it say about us that there are so many... er... unfortunate people in prominence in our culture?

Michael Moore, for example, brought the intellectual rigor of UFOlogists and crop circle enthusiasts to the issues of health care and 9/11 and gets on talk shows and is interviewed and quoted and can make a living quite comfortably being a specious pedant with the personality of a bothered skunk. I sometimes look at Michael and see a dozen guys I used to work with in shops and factories and offices during my working life; not in an ode to the dignity of the "common man" way, but in a "you need to take a shower and why are you such a consistent jerk everyday I come in here" kind of way. If he hadn't had a fortunate series of breaks come his way in life he would probably be a guy who works at Toys-R-Us and thinks that room full of garbage he has collected over the years, sitting in the back room and stinking up the neighborhood will someday be worth millions. you just wait!

Druggies who rail against drug use. People who are all for sending other people's kids to fight dozens of wars all over the world to project the power of the country they love so much even if they, themselves, actually dodged the draft. Closet queens who bemoan the upsurge of gay rights in our country. Atheists who stand up for "Christian values". Christians who pick and choose what needs to be taken literally from the Bible and conveniently forget about the rest. Prickly, combative, intransigent, and self-realized demagogues like Rush Limbaugh seem to be a dime a dozen nowadays, and no one can seem to recall how the venom all got started. But the way it is - led by these kinds of folks - if you don't get up in someone's face immediately upon engaging in a debate THE AUDIENCE ITSELF (us) will consider you weak and pointless. We've come to the point where people who would support the idea of civility in the national conversation have to verbally cut the balls off anyone who disagrees with them first just in order to get heard. Talk about an endless cycle feeding on itself. The question we need to ask, though, is - is this the influence of these figures or are they our creation, held up in their positions by our patronage and maintained by our demand in the marketplace. All we'd have to do is turn it off - flick the switch - hit the button - and the power we've bestowed on them will be taken out.

Not to mention the overpowering double standard that exists in the culture when it comes to who can say what to whom. This guy (Jeremiah Wright), for example is still in his pulpit strictly because he is black. Were he white, and railed against Jews and blacks instead of Jews and whites - using Wright's own words but changing the particulars - we all know he would have been forced to step down by now. Were he white he would be getting drummed out of his denomination. Were he white there would be plenty of black leaders bringing his crimes to the attention of the media. Were he white he would be challenged on the facts of his positions. But because he is black he can say that Jews control the White House and white people are the Devil with complete impunity.

Furthermore hardly anyone wants to be caught saying "if he was white he'd be gone" or "because he's black he still has his job". No one wants to say it because saying that just is NOT OK. Black people have had it rough and black people can't be racists and yadda yadda yadda. So, instead, he stays in prominence in the general culture, largely unchallenged and even looked-up-to by folks who are afraid to even criticize somebody "of color." Once again a despicable creature from some lagoon filled with bigotry and hatred and rotten to the core of his being like Jeremiah Wright is right up there on the national stage. And we're the ones who keep him there. I'm doing it even by mentioning the fact that he's a spiteful, uneducated piece of crap who needs to slither back into the shit hole he was born from.

And the latest phenomenon is the "celebrity" who thinks that by admitting he's an asshole somehow absolves him from being one. This is the most dangerous trait yet. Just step up to the mic, tell everyone you know you're a fapping little prick, then sit back and have everybody say "well... you know... he admits it" and this somehow makes you a lovable fapping little prick.

Watch out for that curve ball. That's the next star we pin to the heavens. Stress the "we".

Who Are These People?

2009-06-16T11:51:00.002-05:00

Not <---- THESE people, you dirty, dirty little man, the people who have phone numbers like 720-932-2821 and 630-645-4500 and 212-266-5381 and 412-401-8453 and 269-768-2461 and 213-570-8360 and 269-768-2910 and 616-980-2836 and 231-732-2341?

All of these numbers are connected to that very special kind of phone call where you're not sure what they want, what they're selling, why they want your information, why they hang up if you answer, and why they don't leave a message or - if they do - leave a message that has nothing to do with anything you ever needed or wanted.

Can I talk to the person responsible for ordering your office supplies? Can't come to the phone right now why don't you send your catalog. Click.

Hi JD, I'm calling to verify your information. Well for starters my name isn't JD. Oh. Can I talk to JD? Um... there's no JD here. Click.

Do you want to make $100 an hour for doing nothing? Just... Click (mine)

HiYA! This is your Captain Speaking!! Click (mine again).

They hang up on you, you hang up on them, they don't leave messages, sometimes they even get nasty, they have no catalog, they hang up when you ask what company they are calling from, they hang up when you say "no sorry, I'm not giving you my card number." No one I know of has ever "done business" with any of these people. Straight up enter these numbers right in the Google search line and you'll come up with lots of complaints and stories about the numbers (and no, the DO Not Call List isn't worth crap - even if it doesn't exactly apply in this case).

So how the hell do they stay in business? Phones cost money. Using phones costs money. People to operate phones cost money. Phones and people can't be out in the rain. Walls and ceilings cost money. So how do they make their money?

One day soon I am going to answer (even though I can see what's calling here at the office) and just see where it leads me. If they want info I'll give them perfect crap info that will be good for nothing. Just to find out. I simply don't get how this particular industry works and what it is even doing.

No Pain For Cakes

2009-06-15T10:30:00.003-05:00

Sure do think a lot about food when you're trying to drop a few pounds. Things like "is Arugula an island near Trinidad?" And the Lounge Lizards have a tune titled "No Pain For Cakes" that has caught my imagination and stomach, even though there are no lyrics and there is no singing.

Officially there are six pounds gone since June 1. Unofficially Arugula is actually a branch of the Nubian language tree. Shall madness ensue and I start chomping on the pens and gnawing at the tree bark, thee shall know why.

I'm going in...

Last Night's Dinner

2009-06-12T07:41:00.001-05:00

I know what it is, y'know. I don't know anybody who likes food more than me. I like to cook and I like to eat. Especially eat. Especially when I can drink while I especially eat. The thing that makes cutting your weight difficult is the fact that a "di-et" is just so damned unsatisfying. You know. You don't get the stuff that makes that fulfilling thing that happens in your mouth when you bite into something that's so good, or the feeling that you've answered the call of that wild buffalo lurking in your stomach demanding to be fed.

The trick, I think, is to get flavor. And with favor, get MASS. Of course if you eat in mass on SOME things you're asking for trouble. That's our whole problem. My search is in trying to find stuff that's savory good that won't make your desire to lighten your body mass a big dumb joke. My thing here is to say "ok" to one thing that will make the difference in a plate for flavor. So here's RW's Mato Sammich... for guys.

This is 3 (count 'em THREE) big huge slices of whole wheat bread. Not the stuff that just says whole wheat on the package but not FIRST in the ingredients; but real slam-dunk whole wheat whole wheat. Through and through. The kind that has that kind of "nut" taste. Anyway... 3 slices of whole wheat bread - toasted.

Then you get a big red tomato. Then a clump of arugula. Then a big wad of romaine. Then raw red onion. And pepper. Shake that pepper mill!

The next part is up to you. Some people like mayo, some would rather Miracle Whip. Some people would look at this and say spicy Italian or balsamic. It's your call. The trick is in not cutting back on this step. Don't use the damn "fat free" and the blah blah blah. Get the stuff that's bad for you for this part. You know - the stuff that tastes good.

The theory here is this; The only thing in this sandwich that goes against the intuitive nature of a "diet" is the spread you use. Absolutely everything else is from the produce section or the part of the bread shelf nobody goes to. And, voila... Massive foliage on bread.

You need two hands to lift the damn thing. You bite into this and you know you've got a holt a'sumpin. And it freakin tastes good. And there's a whole shitload of it too! So you'll be full. I flavored some ice water with a bit of lemon and a dash of sugar to drink with it and it was byootiful.

There's another thing to buying more fresh produce instead of the junk; my food bill just got deflated. What does a loaf of bread, a handful of tomatoes, a bag of romaine and a bag of arugula cost? Oh and yeah a red onion. And pepper. Costs nothin'!

For me I think the key is flavor and mass. So long as I can taste something that isn't like freakin cardboard I can do this.

Bone your appa-teat.

4 Pounds Gone

2009-06-11T08:32:00.002-05:00

No cakes, cookies or candy. No fast food of any kind. No pre-made, processed, from-the-freezer food. Replace the "snack" before bed with a glass of veggie juice. Fruit for lunch (as much as you want). Have a bowl of pitted dates (shut up, dates are yummy) up and open in the house to chase the munchies. Minimum of two, goal of three, meatless days a week. Repeat no fast food of any kind. Only whole wheat breads. Salad at every meal (no I will not give up on the dressing. It's Ken's Honey Mustard or Newman's Balsamic Vinagrette and keep the damn "low cal" dressings on the shelf mankyouverythutch. On this I will not compromise). Remind self that balsamic vinagrette is not for drinking, though I could probably do it. Add more veggie ingredients to all salads. Also nuts. No more "snack food blitz" behavior ten seconds after coming in from work every day - replace with water and running three days a week - also remember bowl of pitted dates (honest, they're really good). Replace ice cream with yoghurt. Reduce amount of days with a potato on your plate - replace potato with second vegetable - eat all of that you want. Be good to yourself and have a nice big beautiful steak once a week (you can afford it because you're not buying potato chips, cheetos, buttered popcorn or similar junk). Add a bowl of blueberries next to the dates and grab handfuls in passing. Authentic Mexican (meaning not America-food-behemoth brand) tortilla chips and salsa are perfectly fine just so long as you don't gorge yourself with it. Do more of that Mediterranean pizza (hahaha, made it last night & went very light on the cheese. Plus beer. You don't have to quit beer). Same standard time for vitamins & supplements every day. And that "hungry" feeling? That "hungry" feeling is perfect bullshit - you're not starving, what the fuck is wrong with you?? Think of that "hungry" feeling as fat burning off. Repeat that mantra.

4 pounds gone in 11 days. Now all I have to do is STICK TO THE DAMN PROGRAM YOU DUMBASS! (that's "generic" dumbass, not you especially).

The Tick Of Time

2009-06-01T18:16:00.007-05:00

I had probably one of the best childhoods anybody could ask for. Whenever I screw up and look around for somebody or something else to blame, the one thing I know I can't honestly do is blame my parents or my childhood for what a fuck up I am. I had no idea of anything but whatever boyhood fantasy I was into at the moment. Davy Crockett, The Alamo, The White Sox in the 1959 World Series, Sky King, Circus Boy, Ask Not What Your Country Can Do For You... etc.

And no doubt you've seen my train thing I'm doing for next Christmas (don't worry, it's still going - I've just hit a boring phase where I'm filing rail and stuff you don't need to see... Jimmy Cagney's advice to actors- "never let them see the work" would apply at this moment).

That train thing is a sad little effort to recapture something I've lost in the last few years and am "efforting" - in a big, tangible way - to recapture.

Recently, along those lines, I've also been searching the web and bargain bins for things that "informed" my kid brain when I was a boy; stuff you loved when you were small, stuff that was just (as we said in Chicago; "that's tits!") the best thing you ever saw - in all your seven or eight years of living. And recently I was just bowled over... completely floored, to see that an old cartoon that I watched as a wee one had finally been put on a DVD and made available for general consumption.

When I saw it (1961?) it was chopped up into episodes and presented as a serial on a local Chicago kid's show in which a puppet goose thought he was King of the United States and there was this guy named Frazier who wore a Prime Minister's jacket and humored him. Don't ask.

The cartoon turns out to be the very first Russian animated, movie-length feature. We had Max Fleischer (sigh, look away dreamily) and Disney (coughcoughcough, hack - spit), and they had some unpronounceable studio of the People. In Russian it was known as "The Humpbacked Horse", in English the fairy tale is called "The Magic Horse" but the cartoon serial was known as "The Firebird" because of the curse of the Firebird's magic feather (run with me here).

So anyhow I went and bought the DVD. It's exactly what I remember.

I expected the washed-out color - it's a copy of a copy of a copy. I knew that (though you CAN see the colors as intended on YouTube! - except it's in Russian). I expected the choppy cuts and the bad editing. It had that. I knew it. I was ready.

I called the one and only service that provides the DVD and spent half an hour with the guy who runs the place - someone who seemed to really care about what he was trying to preserve and was doing the best he could with what he had. I called him off the web site number (turns out he's right here in Chicago) and determined in the first five minutes of our conversation that he loved what he was doing, even if he was scratching at it (He deserves a link). I ordered the DVD, and it was exactly as it was when I was a boy.

Except it sucked.

The disbelief I was so willing to suspend when a kid snapped back at me like a mean-spirited rubberband. Because it was an English over-dubbed version I could see where the cartoon characters were still yapping their lips when the English speakers were long done. Grandiose, broad movements by the characters didn't always match the words. Dead air infects the thing. And the washed-out color, which in fairness I was fully aware was coming my way, took it all down a notch or six.

By the second half hour, with the "oh wow this is IT this is IT" worn off, I found myself having to force myself to finish. It was sad. Truly sad.

But you know what? I'm glad I have it in my collection. My grand daughter won't get it. My wife and daughters will take a pass. I can't honestly say I'll ever watch it again as long as I live. But I'm keeping it. And - if you like animation - there are moments of jaw-dropping expertise scattered around enough to make it worth your while.

I don't get it though. It was SO cool when I was seven. What the hell happened?

Bullet Points That Will Kill You

2009-05-28T09:38:00.005-05:00

[boink] - Where is the data that proves gay marriage erodes the viability of American culture and values? And which is a higher American value that should trump the other; that people of the same sex can't fool around in the bedroom or that everyone has equal protection under the law?

[boink] - Dear North Korea. Dude... no one is going to attack you. You're not sitting on a vast pool of some untapped, massive resource that big multinational companies are conspiring to steal from you. Geographically you are strategically insignificant. You're of no economic value anybody can think of. No one wants to take you over. Nobody cares if your Fearless Leader or Mr Big or whoever he is wants to keel Moose and Squirrel. Nobody cares if Korea is ever unified again. Everyone has moved on from 19fuckin53. Nobody cares what you think. Nobody wants to bother you. What the hell is your problem??

[boink] - Jon and Kate plus 8 - We care because....?

[boink] - By the way did you notice that Tom Cruise still can't fly? And on a related note I've been reminded that the fraud trial has begun in France. See? I KNEW it was wrong to stop calling them French Fries. FRENCH fries! FRENCH fries! Vive l'France!

[boink] - Once upon a time the general worldview of the American Conservatism was marked by a belief in less bureaucracy, a non-interventionist foreign policy, and keeping the intrusion of government into your personal life as checked as possible. I was on board! But then American Conservatism came under the control of the "neocons" where an intrusive bureaucracy that served Wilsonian interventionism and nation-building became acceptable, and all the other stuff was supported by the Christian Right - which wanted to uncompromisingly impinge government into your personal life - I complained! I said that "traditional conservative values" were being trampled on. I recall I was asked where I got off thinking I was the true arbiter of what does and does not constitute "real conservatism" and was labeled a dreaming, unrealistic, immoral isolationist. NOW the conservative movement in America struggles to find its footing again and none of them can agree on what "conservatism" means any more. Humph. The most prominent thinking, currently, amongst them is that they have to get back to the place where they were "true to traditional conservative values." But whose? Because apparently no one can decide who is the arbiter of what does and does not constitute "real conservatism". To usurp someone else's observation from an earlier time - if Conservatism fails it's epitaph should merely read "died of a theory."

[boink] - Does vodka go good with Jones Soda's Fufu Berry? Fufu Berry is actually pretty good. I like Fufu Berry lots! You got a problem with that?

Here We Go Again

2009-05-27T13:09:00.003-05:00

It's not complaining, and it isn't against my will. In fact it's all about my decision. There's no excuse for having dropped the doing of it last fall (cold weather is not a good enough excuse when you LIVE here), and there's no excuse for waiting this long before I picked it up again. But it absolutely HAS to happen.

The workout & live right campaign commences again on Monday, and I am mentally preparing myself for it.

My stomach is hanging over my belt. I put the 10+ pounds I lost last summer right back on. I grunt when I tie my shoes. My back hurts all the time. I'm sluggish. I've increased my sedentary-to-active ratio (I just invented that). I'm eating too much fast food. I'm not regular on my vitamins or the magnesium that keeps the chronic headaches away.

It's all self-motivated, so no fishing for "oh you don't have to" comments going on right here. I'm going to do it and you can't stop me.

Can you?

I Am A Cultural Question Mark

2009-05-22T14:38:00.002-05:00

I think it is finally getting to me that people talk about this or that actor, this or that band, these or those gadgets, and I have fallen into the old man trap of responding to it all with a blank stare and a mouth open in ambiguity. Or perpetuity. Or whatever.

And there was a time when I was proud of that - can you imagine. As if to say the stuff that goes on today isn't HALF as good as the stuff that went on in MY DAY. And there it is --- "MY DAY." Yikes.

So I decided I would stay up with the music and follow the trends and keep track of the greater societal elements that swerve around my ~~car~~ head. I decided I was going to stop automatically nixing anything new that came my way. Start going to movies again and listen to the hum of the busy, bustling, newest things.

And now I'm an old man who is trying to seem with it out of desperation over the evaporating years.

I can't win. This is a good excuse for beer.

I Overanalyze Visions Of Jesus And His Mom

2009-05-20T23:51:00.006-05:00

You know those pieces of toast and waffles and water stains on the wall that look like Jesus or Mary and stuff? OK so it's stupid enough that there are people actually thinking it's "a sign" or that it's an apparition with some kind of meaning trying to be expressed by the deity or sub-deity - but the truth is all they are resembling are representations of Jesus or Mary made over a thousand years after they were around. So what are people thinking when they say "that's Jesus" when in reality all they are actually saying is "that's an apparition that resembles an 18th century painting of Jesus." I mean the guys who painted Jesus and Mary didn't actually KNOW what they looked like. Like - those paintings of Jesus and Mary are representations through a 16th or 17th or 18th century eye of what they THINK they looked like. Nobody ever painted a picture of them in the era they were supposed to be around. So, like, it isn't just that people actually believe these are visions they bring flowers to and whatnot, but that what is really happening is that people are bringing flowers to stuff that looks like 16th or 17th or 18th century representations of Jesus and Mary. Which is even MORE insane. I mean it's, like, a Christian principle that there aren't supposed to be images of Jesus anyhow. So what the hell?

Uh....

2009-05-18T00:04:00.002-05:00

Chia Obama

I...

Uh......

Am Me High Maintenance You Think?

2009-05-15T14:53:00.003-05:00

Have you seen this one before? It's for both men and women. I caught it whilst checking my hotmail mail... mail. This was a featured quiz, and I had ten minutes to kill so I did it. I can't recall if I've done it before.

It wants to find out if you are a high maintenance partner.

I apparently am a limp noodle. I'm

The Patient Pleaser

"You're clearly a loving, understanding, go-along-to-get-along person. But you may want to address whether you're getting as much as you're giving. It may be that you're simply not addressing your own demands. It may be that you yourself are dating someone high-maintenance, even bossy. But whenever there's a hint of disagreement, you're willing to give up your aspirations for love and attention so that the other person can have his or her way.

"Don't for a second lose your pleasant demeanor. But don't be afraid to push back once in a while with a request for a change or a demand for attention. Even getting into an argument can be healthier in the long run than bottling up your emotions. And you may just find that the other person respects your love more when you stick up for yourself."
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That ended up harsher than I was ready for but I put in honest answers. I don't think for one minute that my needs aren't being addressed cuz I ain't got any.

See where you are. Be honest.

How Crazy Ya Wanna Get?

2009-05-05T22:07:00.003-05:00

Reunion, IL is a stop or two east of Galena, and therefore is nearing the highest ground in the state. There are bluffs along the Mississippi and actual hilly vistas as you go - unlike 99.99% of the rest of the state. Anyway that's my excuse for adding a rise of ground that needs a tunnel, but really... what would a train set up be without a tunnel?

Well we're going to use a little modest one so we don't lose all correct perspective, just to go through a sharp outcropping just before you come into town. I'd show you the hills but they're drying right now.

Instead I'll show you the tunnel.

And the question posed by the title of the post relates to the excessive amount of detail we're putting into the project. And so the answer is... VERY crazy.

As in, just in case somebody peeks into the tunnel, instead of paper mache or wood slats or empty space going under the hill... we've put in an interior.

Railroad ties. Yeah. We're nuts. The chances of anybody looking are what? Well you never can tell. And it's because you never can tell that some of the houses in town are actually going to have people in them. I'll work out how we see them later.

In the meantime... take a peek. The first picture is what it would be in natural light. I flashed the second picture so you could all go orgiastic on the details.

Yeah. Railroad ties. Get the straight jacket...

Saturday Morning Waffle Special

2009-05-02T12:12:00.005-05:00

1. A dollop of refried beans mixed with a dash of olive oil in a bowl. Add water to loosen just a bit to make spreadable if you have to.
2. Melt butter in a pan and fry 1 egg. Make sure the butter is hot so the edges of the egg brown and the yolk stays soft.
3. Toast a small frozen waffle.
4. Spread the refried bean mixture on the toasted waffle. Drizzle this with maple syrup. Put a slice of Muenster cheese on top of that. Put this combination in a broiler and keep in there until the cheese is melted (no dripping! No burning!)
5. Remove from oven, layer this with a slice or two of coppa ham (mild).
6. Put the fried egg on top of the ham. pepper and salt to taste.
7. Eat

This was actually an elimination round winner on Top Chef a couple years ago. It's cheap and YUMMEH. Vegetarians who still eat eggs, just take off the ham - I've tried it without and is good that way too.