247 'Web Site Story' - the off-Broadway, online musical

2009-07-02T15:38:43Z

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

CollegeHumor.com has struck again, this time with a snappy musical about online dating with strangely familiar tunes...

Can we stop asking what Twitter is for, now?

2009-06-15T14:58:29Z

In recent months what has been called the mainstream media has been all over Twitter. Countless articles have appeared about celebrity twitterers, about how many people use it, about what it means. Always included is the assumption that Twitter is just another faddy social network timesink where people could share their intimate, boring details to the world, an excuse for another "look what those online weirdos are doing now" article even as those same media outlets started their own Twitter accounts, just in case. Just yesterday morning, CNN's Howard Kurtz asked his guests "are we going overboard with this Twitter business?"

And, to be fair, us online weirdos do waste a lot of time there proudly announcing things to the world that few other people really care to read.

Except for last weekend, when Twitter's question "what are you doing" was answered with "marching with the opposition supporters in Tehran."

Twitter is nothing more or less than a way to connect to other people. You post messages to Twitter from your PC or your phone or your Blackberry, and those messages must be under 140 characters (the SMS limit for most phones), which almost seems too few to bother. Going to twitter.com most days, you'll see a hodgepodge of posts about what someone is eating, who likes what band, and generally far too much information about people's personal lives. A reporter going no further than that would see no point, and he or she would probably be right.

But once you sign up for a Twitter account, you can choose to follow specific twitterers, so that the page you see when you visit (or the messages that come to your phone or 3rd party Twitter feed program) will be messages that specifically interest you. Then it becomes useful.

Follow a group of people all working on the same project and suddenly you have an instant production chat room. Follow the other members of your family and suddenly you have an ongoing update on just what your relatives are doing, some context for their lives you won't get with the occasional phone call. Follow celebrities and suddenly you get a glimpse into the often alarmingly prosaic lives of famous people. Follow news outlets or local emergency services (like the Holly Hill police department or the Flagler County Emergency Office) to get live updates on events in your area. Follow a specific trend by searching for "hashtags" -- search terms included in Twitter posts, preceded with a # sign to make them easier to find -- and you'll get a wealth of information and conversation and debate on that topic.

And if you follow people who are present for a major news event or if you follow a trend like, say, "#iranelection," suddenly you are swimming in a sea of eyewitness reports reporting in real time, far faster than any news organization could ever manage.

Last Friday the results of the election in Iran were released under controversy as turnout for the opposition candidates was believed to be high but incumbent president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad abruptly was announced to have a commanding 2-to-1 lead. The numbers released were widely believed to be fraudulent, protesters began taking to the streets, and people marched and fought police in numbers unseen in the country for over a decade.

If you watched MSNBC, FOX News, or most other American news stations, you might have heard something about it in between reports on the Jonas Brothers, Six Flags filing for bankruptcy, or a rerun of Larry King's interview of one of the hosts from "American Chopper." Their online counterparts were a bit better, but mostly American media was asleep at the switch. Not so Twitter. While Kurtz was on CNN talking about Ashton Kutcher's twitterfeed, Twitter was alive with up-to-the-minute reports of protests, beatings, and arrests.

Twitter was in fact one of the major communication tools used by the protesters to get out the word of what was happening in Iran. Text messaging, the principle method supporters had been using to plan and promote campaign events, was mysteriously disabled before polls opened. Facebook.com and many supporter Web sites were blocked. But many supporters found they could send tweets, and did. As cellphones and other services were blocked, they found open IP addresses and sent them to each other to keep the lines of communication open. Leading opposition candidate Mir Hossein Moussavi tweeted about his house arrest and used Twitter to organize protests and rallies. People tweeted directly from the riots, detailing assaults on universities and telling tales of brutal attacks and sometimes simply marveling over the groundswell of support.

"ALL internet & mobile networks are cut. We ask everyone in Tehran to go onto their rooftops and shout ALAHO AKBAR in protest #IranElection" This went out and was retweeted constantly before Iranians gathered by the thousands on their roofs early Sunday morning and chanted.

Other online services also played large parts. Cellphone videos uploaded to YouTube and Vimeo and LiveLink showed us the faces of the people on all sides of the uprising, hopeful and snarling and cheering and determined and terrified. Blogs have been filled with updates minute by minute. A Flickr gallery dedicated to images from the Iran election protesters gets new additions every minute. From one of the most repressive regimes in the Middle East, word is still getting out. And a lot of it is getting out on Twitter.

In the defense of mainstream media, not everyone was lagging. The BBC was all over the story, sending reports and video and getting it all online even after their cameraman was arrested and their film confiscated. Reuters and The Associated Press provided stories for the thousands of news outlets that can no longer afford foreign bureaus, if they ever could. The New York Times Lede page did an excellent job pulling together disparate sources, as did the Huffington Post and bloggers such as Andrew Sullivan. While twitterers roundly castigated CNN for it's surprising lack of on-air coverage (using the increasingly popular hashtag #CNNfail), CNNi reporter Christiane Amanpour continued to send updates from Tehran, and by Sunday afternoon CNN was covering it with the thoroughness expected of them.

And unlike Twitter posts, anything a mainstream media outlet puts out there must be verified, which can be difficult to do in tumultuous times with uncertain and biased sources, so some delay is inevitable. Twitter is, after all, nothing but a never-ending flood of hearsay where rumors can be retweeted and given the force of fact in seconds. "News" from Twitter must always be taken with a pound of salt. Marc Ambinder provides some tips on separating the wheat from the unfounded chaff.

But when it comes to hearing from real people, whether it's for breakfast descriptions or meeting up for a movie or talking about being beaten by plainclothes security officers during a protest march, Twitter beats them all.

So can we stop with the "what's it for, anyway" articles? What Twitter is for, is for people to talk to each other.

And sometimes they have something important to say.

Life Magazine unearths new Marilyn Monroe pics

2009-06-02T15:12:25Z

Life Magazine has been going through their old photo negatives to get them scanned and online, and they've stumbled across a goldmine: unpublished photos of then-24-year-old and relatively unknown Marilyn Monroe by photographer Ed Clark.

The photos depict Monroe in Griffin Park in Los Angeles, sitting and standing and lounging and generally being Marilyn. Life doesn't know why the photos weren't used -- a photo by Ed Clark of Monroe and Jane Russell appeared on their cover months later -- but they may have a clue in a memo found about the shoot, which says only: "this take was over-developed and poorly printed."

Personally, I wish I had some lousy, overdeveloped photos like that stashed away. I've always wanted to buy my own island.

'Buffy' without Whedon? Is that even legal?

2009-05-26T15:47:44Z

Writer/director Kevin Smith often tells the story of being called in back in '96 to pitch an idea for a new "Superman" movie to producer Jon Peters, and describes -- to howls of laughter from his audience -- Peters' bizarre vision of how the newly rebooted Superman should be portrayed.

"One, I don't want to see him in that suit," Peters told him, in all seriousness. "Two, I don't want to see him fly, and three, he's got to fight a giant spider in the third act." And Smith's audience roars at this familiar tale of Hollywood cluelessness.

I got that same feeling of "what the hell are they thinking" when I read the news today: the producers of the original, less-than-successful "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" movie that evolved into the much more successful TV show are planning to bring it back to the big screen. Which is great, since Whedon fans have been clamoring for a return to the franchise for years now and there's definite interest out there.

Except original BtVS movie director Fran Rubel Kuzui and her husband, Kaz Kuzui, who still own some rights to the name, and their partners Vertigo Entertainment have not actually involved Whedon. Nor do they plan to include Willow, Xander, Giles, Spike, Angel, or any of the other familiar characters from the show. We're talking a planned reboot:

"One of the underlying ideas of "Buffy" allows Vertigo and Kuzui to do just that: that each generation has its own vampire slayer to protect it. The goal would be to make a darker, event-sized movie that would, of course, have franchise potential."

It's an obvious idea. Here's a brand with tremendous fan appeal, with vampires (get those "Twilight" fans) at a time when big screen reboots (James Bond, Star Trek) bring in big numbers. But judging from the reaction across the Internet today, this is an idea that was staked before it ever rose.

The biggest problem: it's too soon. The Bond remakes worked because we were already used to seeing new actors, and the franchise had gotten tired enough to need a shot in the arm. Same with Star Trek; the original actors are in their 70s (or dead), the creative vision (Gene Roddenberry) behind the whole thing is gone, and the combination of 40 years of complicated back story plus some recent bland shows made the Star Trek universe almost inaccessible to new viewers. Some new blood was desperately needed. And both reboots were meticulously careful to include as many of the elements that made those franchises popular in the first place they could.

But with Buffy... Creator Joss Whedon is still very much alive and more popular than ever with his recent "Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog" Internet phenomenon and the just-renewed "Dollhouse" on FOX. The "Buffy" TV stars are all still very much alive themselves, still popular and still young enough to play their characters. The franchise itself lives on in the highly successful Angel comics by Brian Lynch and the "eighth season" series of Buffy comic books, all written by Whedon or writers from the show. "Buffy" became popular in the first place because of the creative vision of Joss Whedon, and the fiercely loyal fans know that.

Now if Kuzui is planning a movie about a different Slayer, possibly one in Victorian England or Ancient China or the old West or in the far future, that could work. Something "from the world of 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer'," maybe. (Although Whedon has already done an acclaimed future Slayer story, the "Fray" comic book.) Remember the insane Superman restrictions above? The highly successful "Smallville" TV series used the first two to excellent results, at least for the first few seasons, and for all I know a giant spider is on the way. The world of Buffy is a rich mythology, ripe for new interpretations and stories.

But any attempt to redo Buffy Summers herself, or another Slayer in anything approaching the current day (which would screw with Buffy continuity) will be met with... well, what's it's already being met with. Derision, disbelief, ridicule and the stirrings of an activist movement against a movie that hasn't even gotten past the initial talks yet, and that's just from the entertainment writers. The fans themselves are nearly united against this idea, and that's rarely the sort of buzz you want for a new production. First step in rebooting a hot property: don't anger the people who made it hot.

Kuzui and Vertigo are discovering that there may not be enough Whedon fans to support a blockbuster movie by themselves, but there are definitely enough to sink one.

Twitter users attack... Twitter

2009-05-13T15:22:08Z

Yesterday the gurus behind the quick-hit social network Twitter made a "small settings update." And their user base exploded.

Here's how it worked before the change. Twitterers post simple messages, under 140 characters, which can be read by anyone following their account.

Say Bill follows Susie, but not Jim. If Susie posts:

"Heading out to bfast. Bagles rule!"

Bill would see it. If, however, she posted a reply to Jim:

"@jimfakename The Misery Mules are playing at the club 2nite, meet me!"

Bill would not see it. However, if he wanted to, Bill had the option to go into his settings and choose @allreplies, allowing him to see everything Susie posted even if it was meant for someone else. He would then know that the Mules were playing, something he might be interested in himself. He would also have a more complete snapshot of what Susie was doing or thinking.

Most Twitterers don't do this, apparently. Twitter can be a hard thing to keep up on as it is with conversations flying by, especially if you follow a lot of people who post a lot. And many users don't want to see half-conversations if they're not relevant.

Ysterday, Twitter founders Biz Stone and Evan Williams killed @replies.

We've updated the Notices section of Settings to better reflect how folks are using Twitter regarding replies. Based on usage patterns and feedback, we've learned most people want to see when someone they follow replies to another person they follow--it's a good way to stay in the loop. However, receiving one-sided fragments via replies sent to folks you don't follow in your timeline is undesirable. Today's update removes this undesirable and confusing option.

Only, funny thing? Turns out it was a desirable option. Since then Twitter users have been flooding the service with complaints tagged with #fixreplies and #twitterfail, and they're not happy at being told how they should use Twitter.

@scotthepburn OMG! I'm in a bar and can only hear conversations between people I know! It's so quiet! This place is lame...I'm leaving.

@mrch0mp3rs Jumping into or learning from others' conversations is what made me <3 Twitter. #fixreplies #twitterfail

@mariancall The point: we should have choice. We all use @Twitter differently. Users are smart; give them a few simple options. #fixreplies

@acarvin The no.1 reason people tell me they quit twitter is because they can't find interesting conversations - worse now #fixreplies

Seeing a reply to someone else can often answer a question you hadn't asked, or alert you to a person you didn't know was on Twitter, or just make you laugh. It was like being at a party, where you might overhear snippets of interesting conversation or outrageous reponses. Authors like @neilgaiman and @warrenellis and actors like @stephenfry and @wilw often answer questions through their Twitter accounts which all of their followers could see and benefit from. Now we're all in a question and answer panel audience session where the speaker runs down every time and whispers the answer only into the questioner's ear. Interesting topics won't flow as quickly. It'll be harder to stumble onto interesting.

I had my @allreplies turned on from day one and not having it now makes Twitter much less useful or fun for me. A social service based on communication has just made it more difficult to communicate.

What I don't understand is, why do this? If @allreplies bothered you it could easily be turned off, was in fact off by default, so why take it away from the people who do like it? Does it save on server load? Have some of the newly arrived heavy-hitter celebrity Twitterers complained about it? (I'm looking at you, @oprah) The only word from Twitter is that it was "undesirable." I don't think this word means what they think it means.

Evan Williams tweeted "Reading people's thoughts on the replies issue. We're considering alternatives. Thanks for your feedback." Well, one alternative might be to make an Expert or Advanced tab in Settings, where power users can specify exactly what level of replies they do and don't want.

Or they could just rollback to the previous version and accept that it was a mistake.

Granted, Twitter is a free service and they are welcome to run it however they see fit. And, of course, we are welcome to not use it if it doesn't meet our needs, as evidenced by the fact reported recently that 60% of Twitter users quit after a month and don't return. But as Stone and Williams should have learned from the user backlash every time Facebook makes an ill-considered change, social networks survive on the users and on word-of-mouth.

And when you've got a network designed to let millions of people communicate quickly back and forth across the world, it's not a good idea to give them something to complain about.

UPDATE: Twitter is listening, looks like. Now they're blaming it on tech problems, which weren't mentioned in the initial announcement. Had they said that in the beginning instead of assuring us that we really wanted them to cripple the service, they might have avoided a lot of this. Corporate heads, we prefer it when you're honest with us. Seriously.

Help rebuild Len Wein's comic collection

2009-04-24T21:47:10Z

You may not recognize Len Wein's name, but you may recognize some of the things he's done. He co-created Swamp Thing, Wolverine and some other X-Men like Nightcrawler, Storm, and Colossus. He was the editor on Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons' epic story Watchmen. He wrote for just about every major character in mainstream comics: Superman, Batman, Spider-Man, Hulk, etc. And he lost his house.

OK, you might not know that last part, but it's true. On April 6 he lost his home, belongings and beloved dog to a house fire. Now friends and admirers are working to help him rebuild his comic collection. Not the ones he owned, but the ones he worked on. And you can help.

Go to the Len Wein Project and check out the latest list of needed comics to see if you have any you can provide. Then e-mail comix4len@povonline.com to let them know, and you'll get instructions on what to do next.

Len has provided many of us with many happy memories over the years. Let's give a few back.

Leonard Nimoy: New Trek movie is gigantic, human

2009-04-22T12:27:36Z

As Star Trek's inquisitive science officer Spock, he searched for answers across the galaxy. As the host of In Search Of, and any number of documentaries throughout his career, he has investigated topics that range from technology to aliens and the last days of the Romanovs. And over the past 40+ years he has handled countless conventions and interviews with wit and aplomb. But last Sunday morning, Leonard Nimoy finally heard a question that stumped him.

"My favorite color?" he asked incredulously as the audience howled with laughter. "Who sent you? Who are you?"

"Have you never been asked that before?" the fan asked.

"No!"

"Maybe that's why I asked."

Nimoy considered, then smiled broadly. "Well, good for you!"

(It's blue, by the way.)

Nearly one hundred and fifty people were listening to "A Discussion with Leonard Nimoy" Sunday morning at the FX International convention at the Orange County Convention Center in Orlando. Eager fans shelled out admission fees from $125 to $250. Each received a goody bag with a movie poster, various collectible items and a voucher for an autograph from the man himself (Nimoy was holding court).

The 78-year-old Nimoy handled the room like a pro, telling stories and promoting the upcoming relaunch of the beloved franchise, JJ Abrams' blockbuster movie Star Trek, something he said he realized would be great after seeing the first, unadorned cut months ago:

"My wife is... she loves me a lot and I love her, and she's a great Star Trek supporter, but she's hardly a big science fiction fan, she's not like, like... well, you people," he said to general laughter. "So she was skeptical. About 15 minutes before it was over, she turned to me and she said 'I don't want this movie to end.'"

Nimoy had nothing but praise for the other actors, including Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, and Winona Rider as Spock's mother. "She's wonderful! Wonderful!"

"The movie is big, a gigantic movie, a cinematic movie, but it also has great heart for the characters," he said. He saw the final version recently and said, "I'm gonna tell you I cried a lot. I sat there and cried a lot, watching it. Don't tell anybody.

"Out of character for me," he added.

"Big, gigantic canvas and story, it's a big, big story and the people in it are so versatile, so human, and the way this crew comes together to become the crew of the Enterprise is a very wonderful story, you'll love it. You'll love it," he said. "See it seven or eight times."

With a slightly raspy voice the chatty, laughing Nimoy was light years away from his most famous persona. For most of the hour he answered questions from fans, which ranged from his voiceover work as Galvatron in the animated Transformers movie, to his relation by marriage to Michael Bay ("and he won't hire me!"), to his long-standing friendship with William Shatner, to the photography that has been the focus of his life for the past 15 years, to his upcoming guest spots on JJ Abrams' FOX show Fringe (one in the last episode airing May 12, and two episodes next season, "and then we'll see how the character develops").

One fan even asked him to reproduce his legendarily mocked musical performance of "The Legend of Bilbo Baggins," but instead Nimoy forced the Starfleet-suited fan to come up to the stage and perform it himself, even helpfully supplying the lyrics when the fan tried to back out.

But it always came back to Star Trek.

Shatner didn't really try to kill him in Star Trek IV The Voyage Home, but the robe Nimoy was wearing sucked up water and dragged him down to the bottom of the tank. The Vulcan hand gesture is from a childhood memory of a Jewish High Holy Days ceremony. He didn't appear in the seventh movie, Star Trek: Generations, because the lines written for him weren't Spock lines and he didn't see the point. He was very blunt about disliking "Generations," and not seeing any reason why Kirk had to die in it.

He was fascinated with the issues he brought out in the sixth movie, Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country, based loosely on the Russians' problems with the Chernobyl disaster and their crumbling economy. He loved the way The Voyage Home brought humor back to the Star Trek universe. And he battled with the movie studio over having an alien force in that movie that not only was impossible for humans to understand, but hadn't come to talk to us anyway. Their proposed solution? Subtitles for the probe.

"I said no, no, no, no, we're not gonna do that." He fought, and won, and when the movie was test-screened and the advance audience unanimously agreed that they understood the plot, Nimoy sent that back to the studios with a... well, I can't repeat it here, but it is distinctly odd to hear Spock cuss.

The final question was why, after turning down other offers to appear in the various incarnations of Star Trek over the years, he chose to bring Spock back to life for the new movie.

"I was done. I thought I was quite done, and for many years I was," he said, mentioning the photography that had become his passion. "I was aware of the TV work that (JJ Abrams) was doing, which I thought was interesting and well done. I got a call from him, would I come to a meeting where I met with he and the writers and a couple of the producers.

"And I was struck by the intensity of their feelings about the classic Star Trek material that we did. By their awareness of what the characters were about, and how important the characters' development was, and how important the ideas of those shows were. I was really touched by them, very touched. In fact, it's been reported I got misty at that meeting, and I actually did," he said.

"Because for a long time, I felt marginalized. I thought, no, (the new Treks) have nothing to do with me," he said. "It's over for me. But these people made me feel that what we had done in the original series was still relevant, and useful, and meaningful, and they wanted to get back in touch with that," he said. "And that's what brought me into the project."

JJ Abrams' Star Trek premieres May 8, 2009. Watch the latest trailer at the official site.
Leonard Nimoy's photography (includes nudity): leonardnimoyphotography.com

FX Week: Interview with professional cosplayer Yaya Han

2009-04-16T16:36:21Z

At any science fiction, comics or anime convention, you'll see people in costume. Superheroes, TV and movie characters, cartoons, characters from Japanese anime and manga and video games and more. While it's easy to dismiss them as kids dressing up -- and there are certainly plenty of those -- in many cases you're witnessing performance art.

"Cosplaying," short for "costume playing," has grown from throwing on a Halloween costume to a full-fledged subculture of people who devote great amounts of time, money and attention on crafting their characters in every detail. Cosplayers often attends cons in themed groups, posing for pictures and role-playing their chosen characters as much as a convention center will allow.

For most cosplayers it's a fun hobby, but Yaya Han, professional costume designer, model and cosplay entertainer (and celebrity guest at this weekend's FX convention in Orlando), does it full time. She spoke to me recently about being other people for a living.

Why dress up for a convention? What do you get out of it?

It started out as a way to express my fandom. At the beginning it was just fun to portrait my favorite characters and interact with other fans. Costuming makes the most bold statement about what your fandom is, anyone can see what show you like from across the hall. It's a lot more creative and eye-catching than, say, wearing a shirt with the show's name on it, and it brightens the whole convention hall, which without costumers would be just a bunch of people in T-shirt and jeans.

In the last several years costuming has become more than just fun, it's turned into my career. I make all of my own costumes as well as design for customers such as TV production companies, clubs, and photographers. I also make regular guest appearances at conventions to teach panels and workshops on costuming, judge and/or host contests, and meet my own fans and sign photos.

On top of all that, I an an exhibitor (vendor) at over 20 conventions per year, selling my hand crafted costume accessories and items to the general public.

So simple dressing up has led to a solid, integrated presence in the fandom community for me.

How long have you been cosplaying? How did you get started?

My first anime convention in the US was Anime Expo '99, and I went as an artist showcasing and selling my work in the art show. From seeing photos of the convention beforehand I knew people dressed up in costumes that weekend, so I brought a kimono to wear and with the help of a friend sewed a really simple costume. That was the first time I used a sewing machine!

After that I was hooked like crazy. Until then the possibility of dressing as your favorite manga/anime character never occurred to me so all of a sudden the flood gates opened and all I could think about was who to cosplay next! lol.

How do you choose which costumes to do next?

For replicating an existing character, It's a combination of love for the character and the design of the costume. There has to be both for me to want to spend the time and effort on making the outfit. For designing my own costume, I get inspired by almost anything - music, books, artwork and photos, movies etc. Usually something strikes me and I become obsessed with turning an idea into a costume, and I start sketching and looking for materials immediately. Deciding on a new costume to make is very exhilarating, and I love the process of making a costume even more than wearing it.

How much does each one cost, and how long do they take to make?

They cost between $50 - $600+, depending on complexity, and I have spent as little time as 6 hours on a costume, and devoted more than 5 weeks to one. I have become much faster at sewing and crafting these days so outfits that used to take 2 weeks I can now finish in a few days.

Which ones are your favorites?

I love all my costumes, and it's hard to pick favorites. But if I had to, these following ones were especially fun to make or fun to wear:

Baelfir the Fire Fairy because I put so much time and love into the costume, even when I had no idea what I was doing, lol. I would like to re-make this costume with the knowledge I have now.

Lady Deathstrike (from the "X-Men" comics and movies) because it is so fun to take fighting photos with everyone at conventions!

Empyrean Eyes, my Peacock costume, is one of my favorite original designs. It's really comfortable to wear and easy to get into, but has many textures and layers. I feel very elegant in it!

Which one do you think is the closest to your personality?

Ada Wong (from "Resident Evil") because I love posing with guns and she's such a kickass character.

Do you mind when people stop you to take pictures?

Of course not. As with every costumer, getting your photo taken is part of dressing up. About the only time I do not enjoy photos of me to be snapped is while I'm eating lol. You'd be surprised how often that happens actually, to all of us costumers!

With all the attention, do you ever get to relax enough to have fun at a con?

I always make time for fun! The greatest benefit of traveling to over 20 cons per year is to see and meet people, and I am a lucky girl who gets to see many of her friends who are scattered across the country. Yes, it can be insane, getting up at 6 a.m. to go set up a booth, then sell all day, and meanwhile dress up in costume and take photos, etc. But I enjoy the cons a lot and at the end of day there is always a group of us heading to dinner and then to hang out and chill.

Will you be cosplaying this weekend at FX?

All three days! I am bringing costumes for general wear and for scheduled photoshoots. You will be able to find me at booth #1019 with CMI Toys, signing photos and in costume. I will also have items from my cosplay store available.

What advice would you give beginner cosplayers?

Have fun for yourself, don't dress up in costumes for attention or to fit in - those are not fulfilling reasons to put all this time and effort into a hobby. Really try to find the joy in researching and making your costumes - you can google for just about any crafting and sewing technique these days and there are many tutorials.

Also, don't judge other people and their costumes, and don't let them judge you either. Just go have a blast!

You don't have to be a professional seamstress or model to cosplay, of course. At least month's MegaCon Crystal Rodriquez of Palm Coast became Mia the Unicorn, based on "Peter S. Beagle's Last Unicorn, the Unicorn Tapestries, and a little bit of My Little Pony." Mia was her Rodriquez's first costume, and it changed her con experience dramatically.

"Normally I go to conventions in a t-shirt and jeans and always enjoyed shopping and taking pictures of cosplayers," she said. "Megacon 2009 was Mia's debut and the reception I got, I could never have predicted it would be that big. At one point in the costume, a 5-minute walk took me 45 minutes because everyone stopped me for pictures. I've never been the center of attention before and it was very new, but I enjoyed every minute of it."

Christian Mercado, 18, from Apopka, cosplays at every convention he attends. "I wouldn't have it any other way!" he said. "It's definitely a completely different experience going in costume! It is so much more fun, in my opinion. And it's immensely satisfying when people come up to you to take pictures and compliment on your work!"

Which characters does Mercado cosplay? It might be easier to list the ones he has not. "Being a Star Wars junkie, my first costume ever made was my Darth Vader, which was used for a movie themed Christmas showcase in December of 2007," he said. His other costumes have included "the original Joker from Batman, Snake from Metal Gear Solid, Garindan from Star Wars, a New Republic Jedi from Star Wars, Mario from Super Mario Brothers, a Nazgul (Ringwraith) from Lord of The Rings, Rorschach from Watchmen, Luffy from One Piece, and Edward Elric from Full Metal Alchemist. I have also made my own interpretations of characters from either books or series that have pretty generalized characters, such as the Thought Police from the book '1984,' The Pirate King from the musical Pirates of Penzance, a Robot based off the ones in the Animatrix, and a Hollow from Bleach. I'm also currently working on cosplaying Light Yagami from Death Note, Son Goku from Saiyuki, and Auron from Final Fantasy X!"

"It's just so much fun walking into a hall or (dealers) room and seeing people scramble to take pictures of you and your friends," Mercado said. "Good memories and tons of fun!"

You can find more about cosplaying and plenty of pictures of Yaya Han in costume -- along with details on the characters and what each costume entailed -- at her website AngelicStar.net. Don't miss seeing her (and many, many other cosplayers) at this weekend's FX convention at the Orange City Convention Center in Orlando. And if you're interested in giving it a shot yourself, you can check out sites like cosplay.com or even my own tips on cosplaying here.

All Yaya Han images © AngelicStar.net and the respective photographers, used by permission. Mia image © C. A. Bridges. Rorshach image © Christian Mercado.

FX Week: Interview with Ben Templesmith

2009-04-15T17:36:11Z

If you had to pick a word to describe Ben Templesmith's body of work, it would be...

Well, you wouldn't, actually, because trying to boil it down to a single word would probably do nasty things to your brainmeat. But then again, so does his work. It might be easier to describe the sorts of things this Australian commercial-artist-turned-comics-superstar does, and let you draw your own conclusions.

- Artist and co-creator with Steve Niles of "30 Days of Night" (and many spinoffs), about a vampire gang living in Alaska. Became a movie with Josh Hartnett, Melissa George and Danny Huston. Nominated for an Eisner Award, comics' highest honor. Won the Spike TV Scream Award for Best Comic.
- Creator of "Wormword: Gentleman Corpse," about an extra-dimensional sentient maggot that embodies corpses in order to drink Guinness and, occasionally, save the world. Hardback collection made the New York Times Bestseller list.
- Artist for "Fell," written by Warren Ellis, about an honorable detective in a city gone feral. Nominated for an Eisner Award three years running.
- Creator of "Welcome to Hosford," where a prison run by Russian werewolves gets a new inmate/hunt victim named Ray Delgado, who turns out to be just the right kind of delusional murderer to fight back.
- Artist for "Groom Lake," written by Chris Ryall, about the day-to-day job of keeping UFOs secret.

Templesmith will be attending the FX convention in Orlando this weekend, and took a moment to talk to me about it.

Vampires, werewolves, corpses, inexplicable Nixon-mask-wearing nuns... Is the inside of your head a safe place to be?

Absolutely. It's the guys that draw cutesy crap, the Mickey Mouse guys, who you need to worry about. They internalize everything, until it all boils over. Me? I get it all out onto the page, so I'm honestly a nice guy if you were to meet me face to face. Well, except for my small baby eating habit.

How did you get started in comics?

An art director for Todd McFarlane Productions ( He's the guy that created Spawn, etc ) saw my work online at my website and offered me a job. That's it in a nutshell.

Are there any artists that have influenced you? I see a bit of Sienkiewicz in there...

Can't claim to be a huge Sienkiewicz fan. Didn't grow up looking at his work at all really. I did however, grow up admiring people who were heavily influenced by him, so I'm more second generation on that. However, my real early influences are Ralph Steadman and Victor Ambrus, two non-comic guys.

What attracts you to the comics medium? Do you have plans to do more work with movies?

For me, it's about telling stories. To be able to control the visuals, the pacing and get your ideas out there in rather pure form. It's most definitely my medium of choice but I am, these days, looking at other media. I get asked about doing things elsewhere all the time now though I'll always go back to comics.

What's your typical work day like?

Right now, until June, I actually work out of one of my publisher's offices on actual office hours, which kills me. (I'm a night owl usually) So I wake up at an ungodly early hour, grab a coffee, head into work around 9 a.m., sit there and draw/paint/twitter etc until 6 p.m., then go home and collapse or simply do a bit more work. My natural work flow for years has been to wake up around 12 p.m., chill out, grab some food then work through til the early morning at my home studio, crash into bed, then repeat the next day. I'm no good at the standard office hours.

And your con day?

Not as fun an answer. Wake up, ungodly early (since I was probably out late drinking with pro friends the previous night), drag myself into the con, sit at my booth and proceed to draw commissions and meet fans. That's really about it. I rarely leave my booth since I get a steady stream of people to meet and greet, then when the con closes all the pros go out and catch up.

Why do you go to cons? Do you primarily come to sell, to meet fans, or to see colleagues? Or is it a soul-gathering thing?

Primarily it's to meet and greet the kind of people who buy my work which allow me to pay my rent. Recently I've brought stuff to actually sell, which people seem to like. Meeting fellow pros is also a highlight as generally comics can be a rather solitary profession, notwithstanding the internet chats.

Do whimsical horror writer/artists get a different class of fans at cons?

No idea. I get some very friendly and dedicated people. A particular niche demographic I guess. I'm lucky to have anyone!

Has anyone come up to you in a Wormword costume?

More and more. About 5 now. Each time, they get better and better, so the most impressive one was at my last con. No one has yet dressed up as any of the demonic strippers with living tattoos as yet though. (Hint hint hint...)

What's your favorite con experience, either as guest or fan?

Coming from Australia, I never grew up going to cons, so my only convention experience was as a professional basically. As a guest, I don't have to pay to get in, I know that!

Will you be at the Drink and Draw event Friday night?

If it's at a bar, no doubt I will be. I am Australian, I think I lose my citizenship if I *don't* turn up.

You can find more about Ben Templesmith at his site Templesmith.com, and you can probably find out far more than you ever wanted to know about Ben Templesmith by following his frequently updated Twitter account. And be sure to look for him -- and over 170 other artists and writers including Special Guest of Honor Michael Golden ("Batman," "Vampirella," "Captain America," "Micronauts"), Olivier Coipel ("Thor"), Mark Texeira ("Moon Knight," "Ghost Rider"), Frank Brunner ("Doctor Strange," "Conan the Barbarian," "Red Sonja," "Vampirella," "Man-Thing," "Silver Surfer") and many more. Avatar Press will be making its first U.S. convention appearance, with limited edition comics made especially for this FX con, and editors from Marvel Comics will be holding panels and making announcements. And don't miss Creators Alley filled with more than a hundred artists of all disciplines displaying their work. -- this weekend at FX 2009.

(All images © Ben Templesmith and/or IDW Publishng, used by permission)

FX Week: Interview with Michael Herz

2009-04-14T18:27:21Z

As we get closer to FX 2009, the massive pop culture convention coming to Orlando this weekend, it's time to dig a little and see what you can expect. First up, a few words from FX's Director of Exhibitions Michael Herz.

As we get closer to FX 2009, the massive pop culture convention coming to the Orange County Convention Center this weekend, it's time to dig a little and see what you can expect. First up, a few words from FX's Director of Exhibitions Michael Herz.

It's been 20 years. How did FX get started?

The first show was actually in Tampa in 1989, it was promoted by Bruce Zalkin and called the Tampa Toyfest. Meanwhile, I was promoting the Character and Collectible Show in Maryland. Bruce and I got together in 1990 and in 1991 changed the name to the Florida eXtravaganza (FX). We ran it together until 1997, and I bought it back from him in 2004. In 2007, the show became to big for me to run myself anymore and I took a corporate partner, that's when it became FX International.

What have your attendance numbers since it started?

We've gone from maybe 300 in 1990 to 10,000 in 1996, to 3,500 in 2004 and back up to an expected attendance this year of at least 20,000.

How do you set yourself apart from MegaCon and other scifi/comic conventions in the area?

My dream has always been to be different from the other big events. We want FX to be everything for everyone: A collectible toy show, a comic-con, a sci-i-fi show, a horror show, a sports show, with anime and gaming events and panels and celebrities,your basic pop-culture overload circus! I have always strived to bring in new and different genres and cutting edge activities. This year we have added the celebrity poker challenge, the Drink and Draw, The Disney Pin event, the Sports Pavilion and Project Vinyl has been amped up from prior years. I am always very interested in anything that supports art and artists of any genre, so we have a lot of art-centered events this year.

What's the biggest hassle of organizing what is essentially a small town in an even smaller room?

That's a good analogy! There are a lot of hassles involved with promoting an event of the size and scope of FX. I think the biggest one is that everyone waits until the last second to get involved. Dealers, industry, sponsors all wait until we become a blip on their radar, which in most cases is in the last 60 - 90 days before the show. So our staff is heavily involved in logistical tasks that could have been done many months earlier, rather than the promotion and advertising. It makes the last days before the show days of high stress and no sleep.

How much of the con is handled by volunteers?

We have a huge group of wonderful, talented and loyal volunteers, I'd adopt them all if I could. They make up about two third of the show staff.

How do you decide which guests to invite?

Do you remember when you were a kid throwing sharpened pencils at the ceiling tiles to see how many you could make stick? Same thing. We all brainstorm and come up with an A-list, then I start making offers. I probably wind up making 8 - 10 times as many offers as I get in final guests. I try to bring in guests from vintage entertainment that I would consider icons. I also strive to bring in fresh hot stars and guests from cult favorites. No matter who we get, I like for them to be fresh newcomers to the show circuit.

Do you have a favorite guest story (that you can tell us)?

I have quite a few of my favorites that I can't tell you! When I retire from this business call me and we'll write a book. I have a couple of sharable faves. One involves Hayden Panetierre. I was sitting with her as her handler (actually at the New York Comic Con) when a young man, probably 18ish, approached with his photo to be signed and he was trembling and I don't mean slightly, this guy was shaking from head to toe. He handed her the photo in a motion that looked like he was fanning her and she said, "you're shaking, are you OK?" He replied back that he was nervous meeting her.

Hayden gently took his hand in hers and said that there was no reason to be nervous that she is a person just like him. He almost immediately calmed down. The encounter obviously made his month. She is great with the fans.

Another favorite involved Nathan Fillion at FX last year. A handicapped woman on a motorized scooter had just gotten her autograph from Nathan. He very nicely asked if he could borrow the scooter for a moment, she said yes, and he proceeded to tear around the exhibit floor on it, it was very funny. Some of the ride was captured on video and is available on YouTube. Nathan's the best all around guest we've ever had at FX.

Do you get the sense that FX attendees are a community unto themselves?

Yes, it is like a reunion every year. I think that log distance friends plan to get together to attend each year. It is the same with our staff.

FX runs from Friday, April 17 to Sunday, April 19 at the Orange County Convention Center on International Drive in Orlando. You can find more details here, and schedules, guest lists, and ticket information at fxshow.com

FX Week: a pop culture explosion

2009-04-13T18:39:54Z

When FX International general manager Michael Herz plans his pop culture convention, he doesn't think small.

"We want FX to be everything for everyone," he said. "A collectible toy show, a comic-con, a sci-fi show, a horror show, a sports show, with anime and gaming events and panels and celebrities. Your basic pop-culture overload circus!"

This year's FX show, the 20th anniversary of the annual event, is expected to bring 20,000 fans from all over the country next weekend to the Orange County Convention Center on International Drive in Orlando to join together in the great, geeky bliss of a massive costume party that has overrun an indoor fairground during a music festival. So why should you be there?

For The Celebrities

FX has a reputation for attracting cult-favorite media guests, and this year is no exception with Leonard Nimoy from "Star Trek," James Marsters from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," "Smallville" and "Dragonball Evolution," James Kyson Lee from "Heroes," Lindsey Wagner from the original "Bionic Woman," Scotty "Scotty 2 Hottie" Garland from the WWE and many more from movies, TV and wrestling.

"I try to bring in guests from vintage entertainment that I would consider icons," Herz said.

For some of the guests, doing a con is like coming home. "When I was 10...13...I had a big afro, and I would go to Star Trek conventions with pointed ears and arched eyebrows. I had my Star Trek uniform that I hand-sewed myself," actor James Marsters said in a 2008 interview for Fannish Inquisition, a fan site for TV shows "Stargate" and "Firefly."

"And I found there were -- at conventions -- people that I enjoyed being around. Intelligent, a little weird and full of life. That's why I enjoy doing conventions now. I just love it."

Stars bring lots of fans but FX has an system of tickets and scheduled times that eases the long autograph lines. There also will be professional photo opportunities, themed discussion panels, and "A Conversation with Leonard Nimoy" on April 19 (separate ticket required) with goodie bags of collectibles for all attending.

Who To Expect

Leonard Nimoy (Spock from "Star Trek")
James Marsters (Spike from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel," Milton Fine from "Smallville," Lord Piccolo from "Dragonball: Evolution")
Julie Benz (Darla from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel," Rita from "Dexter")
Juliet Landau (Drusilla from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel")
Clare Kramer (Glorificus from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer")
Camden Toy (Various villains from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel")
Jewel Staite (Kaylee from "Firefly" and "Serenity," Dr. Keller from "Stargate Atlantis")
Morena Baccarin (Inara from "Firefly" and "Serenity," Adria from "Stargate SG-1")
Bud Davis (stuntman "Tango & Cash," "Hook," "Forrest Gump," "Star Trek: Generations," and actor
Jonathan Frakes (Cmdr. Riker from "Star Trek: The Next Generation")
Scotty "Scotty 2 Hotty" Garland (WWE, Smackdown, Royal Rumble, Wrestlemania)
Warrington Gillette (Jason from "Friday the 13th Part 2," Acquin from "Penny Dreadful")
Mark Goddard (Col. West from "Lost in Space")
James Kyson Lee (Ando from "Heroes")
Jason C. Miller (Lead singer of Godhead, actor and voice actor)
Ray Park (Darth Maul from "Star Wars: Episode I," Toad from "X-Men")
Jamie "Fury" Reed ("American Gladiators")
Scott Schwartz (Flick from "A Christmas Story")
Danny Steinmann (Director / Screenwriter - "Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning, Zombie Brigade")
Cerina Vincent (Areola from "Not Another Teen Movie," Maya from "Power Rangers Lost Galaxy,: "MTV's Undressed")
Lindsay Wagner (Jamie Sommers from "The Bionic Woman")
Jake "The Snake" Roberts (WWF, WCW, TNA Wrestling, WWE, Beyond the Mat, Royal Rumble, Survivor Series, WrestleMania)
Valerie "SoCalVal" Wyndham (TNA Wrestling, WWE Smackdown, Pro Wrestling Illustrated, Powerslam! Magazine, MuscleMag Online, TNA Knockouts)
George Lowe (Space Ghost from "Space Ghost Coast to Coast," announcer on "Aqua Teen Hunger Force")
Yaya Han (Costume designer, model, Anime and Cosplay entertainer)

If You Go

WHAT: FX International, a pop-culture convention
WHEN: April 17-19
TICKETS: $20 per day Friday and Saturday; $15 Sun; combination deals available. Additional tickets required for some events.
PHOTO OPPORTUNITIES: For professional photos with celebrity guests, check froggysphotos.com/FXpresales.html for schedules and prices
INFO: See fxshow.com for tickets, schedules and special event times

For The Artists

More than 70 of the hottest comics writers and artists working today will be signing autographs and showing off their stuff, including Special Guest of Honor Michael Golden ("Batman," "Vampirella," "Captain America," "Micronauts"), Ben Templesmith ("Welcome to Hoxford," "Dr. Who: The Whispering Gallery," "30 Days of Night"), Matt Fraction ("Uncanny X-Men," "Casanova," "Invincible Iron Man") and many more. Avatar Press will be making its first U.S. convention appearance, with limited edition comics made especially for this FX con, and editors from Marvel Comics will be holding panels and making announcements. And don't miss Creators Alley filled with more than a hundred artists of all disciplines displaying their work.

For the third year, FX will host Project Vinyl, featuring designer toy artwork and appearances by popular vinyl toy artists such as Ron English, Buff Monster, Angry Woebots, kaNO, and Peekaboo Monster.

For The Stuff

Aside from the hundreds of exhibitors selling comics, toys, books, armor, clothing, weapons and DVDs, FX will start something new this year with a Disney Pin Swap every day of the con. Six exclusive, officially licensed, FX-themed disney pins will be available, with a seventh completer pin offered if you buy the set. Plus, FX-exclusive editions of Warren Ellis' comics "Anna Mercury" and "Ignition City," as well as limited edition Phantom and Captain Action figures are slated to be on hand.

For The Costumes

For many attendees, costume playing or "cosplaying" is at least half the fun of going. Cosplaying is as much performance art as dressing up, with cosplayers acting out their meticulously crafted roles throughout the weekend for each other and the many eager photographers. You'll see Supermen of all sizes chatting with Princess Leias, a team of Sailor Moons being chased by Captain Jack Sparrow, a man dressed as a giant Japanese chocolate treat dancing in the lobby and more Wolverines, Klingons, Poison Ivys and Naruto Uzumakis than you ever dreamed possible. Bring your camera.

For The Tattoos

Yes, the tattoos. The FX 2009 Tattoo Festival, presented by Mark Draven's Ink-Fusion, brings in nine popular ink artists to put a favorite character, scene or original design where it will last: on you. If you've ever been curious about getting a tattoo but not curious enough to visit a tattoo parlor, this is your chance to see it done, ask questions, and think about what sort of artwork you'd like to wear. All city health codes are observed.

For The Partying

Join some of the most talented artists in the industry on April 17 as they get increasingly unsteady in the Drink and Draw Social Club at the nearby International Plaza Resort and Spa. Then come back April 18 in the evening to celebrate FX's 20th anniversary at FX Rocks! with music, contests, celebrity guests, and giveaways. Or stay at the con to see "Buffy" and "Smallville" actor James Marsters perform a one-hour acoustic concert (separate ticket required).

For The Games

On April 17 you can face off against celebrity dealers in the Celebrity Poker Challenge. There will be prizes, auctions, souvenirs, and all net proceeds go to the American Cancer Foundation. It'll be $100 to play, $25 to watch, and donations beyond that are welcomed.

Various booths at the con will host contests, giveaways and auctions. And you can find rooms devoted to board games, role-playing and video gaming from the current hit titles all the way back to the retro, 8-bit era.

About FX

FX started in 1989 as two separate conventions: Bruce Zalkin's Tampa Toyfest and Michael Herz's Character and Collectible Show in Maryland.

Over the next two years they joined forces and created the Florida eXtravaganza, or FX. FX changed hands between the two of them until Herz took it over in 2004 and then took a corporate partner in 2007, when it became FX International.

In the first six years, attendance grew from 300 to more than 10,000 fans. This year, 20,000 people are expected to attend.

Con Etiquette

It can be scary walking through several thousand brightly dressed people who all seem to know each other. But all you need is common sense and courtesy.

Be polite, enjoy the sights, but don't stare. Keep your bags close and be aware of traffic flow.

Cons provide unrivaled opportunities to meet your heroes face to face. Respect their generosity by not bugging them in the bathroom or while they're eating and keeping your panel questions under 30 seconds.

Most of the fans in costume will let you take pictures but remember, they're not paid mascots -- they're there to have fun.

Ask before you snap a photo (often just holding up your camera and smiling first will do the trick) and don't be offended if you get a no.

Don't block the aisle taking your shot. If they've already been holding a pose, ask before you shoot in case they're about to collapse from muscle strain. Don't take pictures in bathrooms, or when they're adjusting, and never touch without asking. In fan terms, "glomping" means aggressive and unexpecting hugging, and it's frowned upon.

If you're in costume yourself -- go, you! -- please be aware that you will be stared at. Be aware of the limitations of your costume and plan accordingly.

AmazonFail: A Twitter movement in action

2009-04-12T19:47:32Z

Updated, see the end for Amazon's response

So, last week two historical books -- "Transgressions" by Erastes and "False Colors" by Alex Beecroft -- quietly dropped off Amazon's bestseller lists.

Not because they stopped selling, mind you, because Amazon apparently instituted a new policy of removing the sales rankings from books with "adult" content. De-ranking a book doesn't remove it from Amazon, but it does keep it from showing up in Amazon's bestseller lists (cutting way down on sales derived from browsing) and there are reports that de-ranked books aren't showing up in regular searches with any consistency.

More newly stripped books followed, lots of them. When asked about this by various puzzled authors, Amazon's rep said this: "In consideration of our entire customer base, we exclude "adult" material from appearing in some searches and best seller lists. Since these lists are generated using sales ranks, adult materials must also be excluded from that feature."

Defensible. Annoying, but defensible. Only... there's still an awful lot of adult material on Amazon with sales rankings. Most of their adult material is still ranked. Nude photography books, explicit romances, everything by Chuck Palahniuk. In fact, judging by what has been deranked, it seems that someone at Amazon is defining "adult" as "gay."

"Transgressions" and "False Colors" are both gay historical romances. The vast bulk of what has been deranked has been books with a homosexual theme, even when the books in question had no explicit sexuality whatsoever. The sex scene in the 1928 lesbian classic "The Well of Loneliness" consists of exactly this: "And that night they were not divided." Steamy!

Biographies. Books on lesbian parenting. Young Adult books on coping and understanding and diversity. Books on gays in the military. Books on Harvey Milk. MetaWriter is listing as many as they find.

And the Twitterverse has gone wild. It's a habit of Twitterers speaking on a common subject to include a "hashtag" to make searching easier. In a matter of hours the subject #amazonfail became the most popular trend in Twitter's search, outstripping #easter, #masters and #pirates almost immediately. Calls for boycotting have gone out, petitions have begun, and plans are afoot to googlebomb Amazon to bring up a new definition.

Some of the tweets have been hilarious.

EKSwitaj: Ulysses has retained its sales rank; I can only assume this is because no one at Amazon has read it. #amazonfail

annaholmes: Anais Nin has no ranking; Henry Miller does. #amazonfail

drivebysmiting: GAY BOOKS? ON MY INTERNETS? I love when someone on the internet does something stupid, because I love e-drama. #amazonfail wins today.

paulbailey: http://twitpic.com/38b5w Too late, Amazon. I already have one of the "adult" books you delisted. It's subverting me as we speak. #amazonfail

heathercorinna: was suddenly struck by the strange irony of being too queer for an Amazon. #amazonfail

Personally I suspect Amazon was trying to make their searches more family-friendly and have discovered the ham-handed insanity of trying to block anything solely by keywords or tags, and I hope it gets cleared up soon. E-mails and calls to Amazon have not received any answers beyond "it's being referred to our IT department" and "please stop calling." But in the meantime, if you've ever wanted to watch an activist uprising in action, check out #amazonfail . T-shirts to come in five, four, three...

Update: According to Publishers Weekly, Amazon said that "a glitch had occurred in its sales ranking feature that was in the process of being fixed. The spokesperson added that there was no new adult policy."

Pretty much what I thought, if only because I didn't think Amazon would be so heavyhanded. Not because of any particular free speech ideals necessarily, but because this sort of thing costs them money and goodwill. Although if no one had complained, who knows. Anyway, it wouldn't surprise me a bit now to see a big "We Love the Gays" GLBT books sale coming up at Amazon any time now....

In defense of newspapers that fold

2009-04-06T20:48:17Z

As you may have read, newspaper sales are in decline.

In fact, the odds are good you didn't actually read that in a newspaper, or at least not one you can tear. More and more readers are getting their news from the Internet, which, nonstop hardcore e-reader that I am, I feel is a mistake.

First, the influx of news online may distract from the natural purpose of the Internet, which is to distribute pictures of women. And second, this trend makes it more likely that print newspapers will fade away, and I believe this to be a horrible future indeed. E-readers such as Amazon's Kindle, no matter how feature-rich, will never replace all the wonderful things we get from newspapers. Yes, you can subscribe to many newspapers and receive them wirelessly on your Kindle, but that's all you can do.

You cannot clip coupons or articles for scrapbooking.

You cannot send articles to friends and family.

You cannot use the previous day's Kindle for packing material unless Kindle prices come way down.

You cannot use the Kindle to block the view of your loving, devoted family during breakfast unless your family is very, very small.

You cannot fold your Kindle into a boat or a hat unless you use a bench vice, a good set of channel lock pliers, and a great deal of determination.

Searching online classifieds has its points, but I do like skimming an entire page at a time and stumbling across accidental wonders.

Silly Putty picks up absolutely nothing from a Kindle, no matter how you try. What fun is that?

Ironically, you cannot use a Kindle as kindling.

You don't get that wonderful, memory-triggering scent of paper and ink when you turn on a Kindle, especially since the "New Book Smell" aerosol product crashed and burned within a day (April 1, as it happens).

It is not that big a deal if you drop your newspaper in the bathtub.

Swiping a newspaper from a neighbor is playful one-upsmanship. Swiping your neighbor's Kindle is grand theft.

To begin reading a newspaper on a Kindle, you soundlessly turn it on. Compare that to the authoritative snap of a forceful newspaper opening, a sound that for a hundred years has been the international signal that Newspaper Reading is About to Commence, Leave Me Alone.

Kindles make terrible papier mache, no matter how finely you slice them.

Getting your newspaper wirelessly sent to you is amazingly convenient, provided you remembered to bring your Kindle with you. Newspapers can be bought just about anywhere for a buck.

Reading articles online is all well and good -- it really is -- but there's something to be said for looking at a newspaper page and getting a gestalt of the day's news at a glance.

You can't leave your Kindle lying around with the crossword completed in ink just to inadvertently show off how smart you are.

The demise of newspapers may result in unchecked tree growth across the country, leading to aggressive forestry moving into our cities and threatening our delicate ecological balance.

No matter how long you read your newspaper you will never wear out the battery, even if you leave it lying out for weeks.

If Kindles go under (it could happen) or change their format, your previous papers may no longer be available to you. But that stack of papers in your garage will remain legible for many years, providing a solid historical archive unless you get fed up and throw them all out.

Newspapers not only bring you daily news and analysis and comics and coupons, but their very substance goes on to enrich our lives anywhere cheap, thin paper is needed. Our country was informed, built, painted, insulated and wrapped with newspapers, and no little, really cool electronic device will ever replace that.

A new riff: When the Internet failed me

2009-03-30T20:55:51Z

Photo: C. A. Bridges

I was at a Jon Bon Jovi concert in New Jersey with my wife a month ago and he was talking about the next Bon Jovi album. The last one, "Lost Highway," had a decided country tinge to it, but the new one was going to be back to basics.

"I'm tellin ya, you gotta trust me on this one," he said. "You wanted a riff rock record, you got a riff rock record. They wouldn't let me back into Nashville so I had to turn up the loud electric guitars on this one." And the crowd of devoted fans went nuts.

One slight problem, of course, was that we didn't know what "riff rock" meant. But we cheered along with the rest and planned to go home and look it up later. I could take a guess. I know what a riff is, and I assume a "riff rock" song would be one with a lot of riffs shoved in it. But the way he said it made it sound like it had an identity. Was it a specific genre, a school, a trend, a group name, a musical theory, what?

No problem! Interweb to the rescue! There were probably hundreds of sites devoted to answering this very question. The Internet knows everything!

Except, apparently, for this. Wikipedia has no "riff rock" entry, not at all. There's a "riff rock" tag at Last.fm, but no explanation. Riffrock.com seems to think I should know already or I wouldn't be there. Google listed plenty of pages and Amazon had several reviews where "riff rock" was being used descriptively, but none of them included a single definition. Ask.com said it didn't know, dot com.

This staggered me. It has been years, literally years, since I casually reached out for information on the Web and came up dry. Had I walked outside, dropped a can, and watched it fall upward, I could not have been more surprised.
And that brought home how quickly the Internet has become our collective conscious.

It holds our memories, our knowledge, our facts. "Google" became a verb almost overnight for a reason. I'm honestly surprised we even still make kids memorize anything. Does anyone need to know the date of the Battle of Hastings unless you plan to hit up Jeopardy some day? As long as there are people out there with a) an intense passion for something, b) free time, and c) a Web site, our pursuit of trivia will be rewarded. We're not quite up to building a hive mind yet, Twitter notwithstanding, but we are building the hive mind's long-term memory, and we're doing it awfully quickly.

Quickly enough to surprise me when I find a gap, anyway.

Our music reviewer, Rick DeYampert, told me what "riff rock" was: a song composed mostly (or completely) of one distinct, repetitive riff, a la the Rolling Stones' "I Can't Get No (Satisfaction).". So now I know.

Maybe I'll start a Wikipedia page about it.

The Browncoats lost another war; this one to the Colbert Nation

2009-03-25T13:46:58Z

In the battle of the fandoms, Stephen Colbert wields a mighty force. Even in space.

Fans of Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report" have marched forward on his behalf many times before. All he has to do is casually mention how nice it would be to have something -- or, more accurately, everything -- named after him to get hundreds of thousands of his eager followers swinging into vote-box-stuffing action. Colbert has already had his name slapped on a minor league hockey team mascot (Steagle Colbeagle, for the Saginaw Spirit), a trapdoor spider (Aptostichus stephencolberti), a Ben & Jerry's flavor ("Americone Dream"), any number of animals in zoos and scientific studies, and even a Virgin America jet ("Air Colbert").

His latest conquest? Node 3 on the International Space Station, thanks to the naming contest for it that NASA just held which included a write-in option, something they now may be regretting. The first two nodes are named "Unity" and "Harmony" and until very recently it was assumed that the third would become "Serenity." Not only does it fit the theme, but "Serenity" is the name of a spaceship in Joss Whedon's beloved-but-canceled TV show Firefly and the subsequent movie Serenity. And the early voting numbers confirmed overwhelmingly that no one is better at organizing online campaigns than Joss Whedon fans.

Except for the Colbert Nation.

"Colbert" won with over 230,000, beating "Serenity" by over 40,000 votes. Another write-in suggestion took third ("Myyearbook," with 147,637) and "Gaia" came in fourth with 114,427. But NASA may not be a democracy. NASA's human space flight chief, Bill Gerstenmaier, appeared evasive about Colbert's ascendency on Colbert's show on March 10. "Well, we're going to have to go think about that," he said.

"That's NASA's problem," Colbert said to him. "You guys think too much."

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The poll's rules stated from the beginning that NASA would not be bound by the winning votes. And early responses from the agency imply that they're leaning away from it, possibly even naming one of the station's new space toilet after Colbert instead.

Now, there are few more loyal "Firefly" fans (also known as "Browncoats") than me. I've supported the show and the movie and the fan initiatives and the annual "Can't Stop the Serenity" charity showings.

But, NASA, the people have spoken. If you wanted "Serenity" you should have named it "Serenity" and announced it, maybe brought Whedon and some of the Firefly actors down to smack it with a bottle of Cristal and a nice photo op. When you hold a contest in the hopes of getting public attention, you really can't complain when you actually get some.

And, frankly, you need it. It's all well and good to bond with fans who already support you but you could really use the shot in the arm this would give you with the non-science-fiction-fan public, which is most of it. You bring Colbert down for the naming ceremony, you'll get more positive attention than you've gotten for 30 years.

"Unity," "Harmony" and "Colbert." Suck it up NASA, and paint it on. You can make it up to the Browncoats by giving us one of the new Orion spacecraft in 2014.

They have learned a vital lesson, though. Monday NASA began the final stage of their "Name the Mars Rover" contest. There is no write-in option.