Marshmallows and Tea

Ghost Pepper

2024-09-30T09:16:00.000-07:00

We got a new kitten and Yohan named him Ghost. If he were a girl Yohan would’ve named him Bell for bell pepper. So now we have ghost pepper, one of the spiciest kittens I mean peppers.

Me: Ghost is so makulit.

Yohan: I thought the correct word was maliKOWT.

Bedtime Prayers

2024-07-22T21:48:00.000-07:00

I love how my son would just start praying when he’s sleepy. He then would change his underwear into diaper and then go to bed.

Ama

2024-06-08T20:17:00.000-07:00

Gideon asked who the man in the picture when he looked at our Alexa device.

I said that’s my father. He’s ama.

Gideon: I’ve never seen him before

Me: He’s not here anymore. He’s dead.

Then I burst out crying.

I looked at Gideon and he had tears in his eyes.

Me: why are you crying?

Gideon: don’t worry mommy we have a new dad. His name is daddy.

Then he started giving me his Mother’s Day card. He carressed my head/hair.

Then a picture of me and Jeff showed in Alexa.

Gideon: mommy look! You’re happy again!

Gideon: mommy, I’m still alive!

Me: yes you are!

I am comforted that even though my son has never seen ama, he showed me sympathy. I will always get by during occasional bouts of sadness.

—

Ama was having difficulty opening his right eye. But he tried his best to open it here so we can have a nice picture together. This picture was taken a month before he passed away. ❤️🙏

—-

Edit:

Gideon: your father is really really fine

Me: you can call him ama

Gideon: wait, I can call him?

(Like in iPad, what he does with lolo and Lola)

Me: no no! I mean, you can call him ama instead of “your father”

Gayuma

2024-04-27T10:40:00.000-07:00

This morning, for the nth time. Jeff looked at me lovingly and told me “Ang ganda ganda mo talaga”

Kinilig ako ng sobra and then he said

“Ginayuma mo ba ako?” 😑

Highschool: 28 years ago in 1996, Jeffrey wrote this poem for me. This was the original notebook he wrote this into. He then transferred it to a stationery with envelope and gave it to me like a love letter 💌

Kung May curious dyan. No, Hindi kami naging mag boyfriend noong highschool. In fact, after 4 years pa.

Medyo matagal nya ako sinuyo. Matigas ang puso ng lola nyo. Pusong bato 😂 Kung Hindi sya pursigido, hindi Kami. Ilang beses ko sya pinauwi noong bumibisita sya sa amin.

——

Questions Answered

If you were in disguised

What would you do?

I’d take off my mask and show

my love to you

It you were darkness

what would you do?

I’d turn the darkness to light

And share it with you

If you were death

what would you do?

I would never claim your soul

And let you live torever

If you were hell

What would you do?

I’d extinguish all the fires

that might burn you

If you were evil what

What would you do?

I would turn to goodness and love

And would never hurt you

If you were satan

what would you do?

I’d take off my horns and tail

And live as a human like you

If you were a devil

what would you do?

I’d give up my life of sin

And live as saint for you

Culture Shock: Water In Europe

2024-04-27T07:49:00.000-07:00

Culture shock when I was in Europe.

My first night at my sister’s house, she offered me water. I was expecting bottled water or from a dispenser. To my shock, she took water from her faucet and then gave it to me. 😮

I honestly have not had tap water in 30 years! This figure is not an exaggeration.

When I was in elementary, I was playing and drank water from the faucet outside our house like usual. Take note, there was a nearby well where we live.

I got sick with amoebiasis. Ama brought be to Makati Medical Center and had my tests, stool, etc. MD prescribed huge tablets I didn’t think I could swallow. I honestly thought drug names were Abbot and Roche, lol. Now that I work in pharmacy. I realized they were the manufacturers.

From then on we would boil water, cool it down, so I could drink water. Eventually transitioned to having to buy purified water in a jug or container.

Our fridge here in California has a filter and water dispenser. But I never drink it. My husband would always buy purified water from the water station and would keep 4 gallons at home. Yes, trauma is still here.

So I when I got up the next day at Sam’s house, I told my husband I was hungry but didn’t want to eat yet since my sister was still asleep. Even though she gave me permission to ransack her fridge. My husband texted “drink water”

That’s when I sent him a crying emoji and sent a message

“ she (my sister) doesn’t have bottled water. She gave me tap water :(“

It seemed very maarte. But when you’re in a situation you’re not used to, what do you do?

Well, after some hesitations, I trusted the European water system and drank it. I still paid for water when we were at restaurants. Also imagine my shock when they wouldn’t give me free water? Hehehe. Here, at restaurants the first thing they ask is drinks. Water is free unless it’s sparkling.

And yes I told my friend Maris that I couldn’t believe she doesn’t have a water dispenser. But everyday I was at her home I’d refill my plastic bottle with her tap Belgian water 🙂

Edit:

I forgot to add. My mom and I had a conversation with one of her favorite movies. Guess what? Erin Brockovich. You could only imagine the conversation that ensues.

No More Egg Allergies

2023-07-14T13:59:00.001-07:00

He's exhausted from staying at the hospital for 6 hours. All worth it!

Gideon completed his second egg challenge which was scrambled eggs challenge. The first one was baked eggs.

He can now eat eggs! Yay! I can't wait to cook fried rice with eggs and egg drop soup , adobo with eggs, arroz caldo with eggs for the family! Leche flan?!😋

Best of all I'm not going to be paranoid checking food labels/ foods at restaurants if they have eggs. Not giving my son enough food when at parties for fear of allergic reaction. 🙏 ♥️

Physical Trauma

2023-03-10T20:27:00.001-08:00

Long post. Triggering.

Mentions of rape (almost) robbery, punching, slapping, mental/physical trauma.

Yesterday I woke up at 4 am feeling the familiar pain. This was the day after my body was slammed onto the pavement because of an electric scooter accident.

My knees, stomach, breasts, ribs, were just in excruciating pain.

It's as if my body was making me remember the event in my life I wanted to forget. It was just the same feeling. The rain in Sacramento didn't help either.

I had a tough time sharing this 20 years ago. It took 13 years before I was able to share it with a family member.

Twenty years ago, I was 22 years old. I just graduated from University the year before. I had a good paying job at a call center working the night shift. One rainy night, I hailed a taxicab to get to work. I usually ride the bus. I only did because it was raining. I wasn't paying attention to the driver when I got in. I had just taken a shower and my hair was wet. I brushed my hair inside the cab. A few minutes later the driver tried to rob me of my cellphone. I lied and said I didn't have it. He threatened me with his small knife and grabbed me from the backseat and sat me in the passenger side. This, while he was driving. I was fearing for my life and wanted to just open the car door and jump on the highway. He brought me to secluded area where there was less light and very few buildings, I remember there was a bridge and river / body of water below it.

He stopped the car and tried to touch me. He punched me in my stomach and slapped me on the face. I was so glad I didn't lose consciousness. I was fighting him and praying to God to save me. I don't want to be a victim of rape. God answered my prayers because his knife dropped and couldn't find it in the dark. That's when I opened the lock to the car door and kicked it open and tried so hard to get away. My butt was on the wet pavement as he was pulling my hair so he could bring me back inside. I used every ounce of my strength to get away.

I ran away so fast not stopping. The adrenaline rush must have helped me. I wasn't looking back because he might drive back and follow me. So I was flagging every car that passed by. One car stopped and a gentleman helped me get to a building nearby where there was security. He said he already saw me and passed me by. He told me I was holding my stomach as if I was stabbed. So he dropped off his wife and kids somewhere close by and went back to help me. He didn't want his kids to see my condition.

The security guards in the building called the police for me. They informed me this has happened so many times in that area. I filed a police report and they dropped me off work. My coworkers gave me money because my purse was left in the evil cab. That was also the last time I rode a cab alone.

When I went home to my cousins' house the following day. I didn't tell them what happened. I was afraid they'd tell my father and I'd be told to stop working in Makati. I showed up with the same happy face like nothing bad happened and slept.

I woke up a few hours later and feeling the pain on my face and my stomach. I had bruises and a small wound on my cheek. My stomach was hurting so bad. I was really beaten.

I couldn't forget what happened. I always see that evil man's face. It's hard to sleep. It took a toll on my relationship with my boyfriend Jeff. I kept breaking up with him. I was battling with myself. I didn't deserve to be with anyone. I felt dirty and ashamed.

I prayed every night "please God make me forget it and let me sleep in peace". God really works in mysterious ways because after a few weeks of always praying. I slowly slept in peace and forgot the feeling of fear and anxiety.

All these memories came back yesterday along with the physical pain. I slept for 11 hours last night. I didn't cry because of that experience 20 years ago. I was frustrated because my body was in pain and the trauma from that physical pain just came rushing back to me. The feeling was the same like someone beat me up. I am taking medications around the clock. I will get through this. This looks like a long post. This was actually a shorter version. I have more thoughts.

I told Jeff about how I was feeling. He didn't say anything, he just hugged me.

That's all I needed.

Hospital Check-Up

2023-03-10T20:24:00.001-08:00

Went to Kaiser for a check-up. Picked up my meds and got free Covid kits.

When I called them at 4 am I was told to go to Urgent Care. My copay for that is $125. I thought of sending an email to my primary care physician if he could squeeze me in today. I got a callback at 8:30 am and was scheduled for a 2:50appointment. My copay was $20.

My knees are still hurting and stinging a little. It was difficult walking down the stairs this morning. I really felt my body was slammed into the pavement.

MD said my knees were still inflamed when she touched it. But the reason I went to see a doctor was because I woke up at 4 am from pain between my chest/breasts and shoulder/arm area. I didn't know what it's called. It turned out to be part of my ribs. As long as I don't have shortness of breath or difficulty breathing MD said I will be fine. Although it will take weeks to heal bruised ribs. Doctor advised to avoid moving just my upper body, squatting. I need to take medication around the clock.

P.S. these anti-fog lenses are worth my money.

Electric Scooter Accident

2023-03-09T18:46:00.000-08:00

I fell riding my scooter this yesterday . Parang humiwalay kaluluwa ko sa katawan ko. Ang sakit ng dibdib at mga tuhod ko. Pero now my whole body aches 😞 I took two Tylenol. Pero Hindi effective. I still felt the stinging sensation. I'm sure it was effective. Imagine if I didn't take meds.

Nag-on automatically Yung cruise control. May puddles pa Kasi umulan noong umaga. Butas Yung gloves ko, gasgas tuhod ko at konti sa kamay. I took Ibuprofen 800 mg when I got home. Pero, goodness! Masakit pa rin!

My knees were so swollen.
I'm sure mas masakit ito bukas at magpapasa pa. I'll continue taking meds. Sana umigi na pakiramdam ko 🙏

Viral Rash

2022-08-08T11:53:00.000-07:00

Gideon had a viral rash last week. I won't go into specifics but it was contagious.

I wasn't able to go to work for 4 days. Jeff was sick too. I'll probably share the horror I felt some other time or never. I was so stressed and sad that Gideon will get worse.

It's a miracle, for a viral rash he only had a dot of a scab on his face and is now gone. Like it never happened. He still has scabs on his arms and legs but it looked very mild compared to when it started.

He was heavily medicated for 5 days. To bring his fever down and to prevent him from scratching.

This is him today playing outside.

P.S. Gideon and I have been praying every night. One night I didn't ask him to pray. He was the one that reminded me we needed to pray. I almost broke down in tears. I was so happy he did that. Thank you God for making my boy better. 🙏♥️

Thank you ama ♥️

Having a baby boy is fun they say

2022-04-16T18:54:00.001-07:00

Gideon gave me the fright of my life this afternoon.

He jumped at the deep end of the swimming pool at 9 ft depth. Without a floaty! He was having so much fun playing in the water and had no idea he almost drowned.

This was how we ended up swimming with our jeans and shirt still on.

I was only replaying what happened just now and realized Gideon never really went below the surface of the water. He was trying to stay above water when I jumped next to him. I was on full on panic mode. But I had managed to have kept him afloat.

I was so embarrassed but I'm fine with it. All the while I was thinking Thank God my boy is alive. I was only embarrassed because I jumped fully clothed .

Thank you to one of Ate Eileen's guests who quickly helped us get out of the pool. I asked for helped but because I swallowed so much water it was very hard to speak. He only read my lips. 🙏

Lesson learned: No matter how cautious, attentive you are as a parent, your children will always leave you flabbergasted with their shenanigans.

P.S.
Jeff was outside when this happened. He was wondering why I was sitting next to the pool with Gideon with my clothes drenched in water. 😆

He had the audacity to take pictures of me wearing the sundress Ate Eileen lent me while I was getting in the car. 🙄

Specialty Pharmacy

2022-01-23T08:56:00.001-08:00

I have been a Pharmacy Technician for over 15 years

I was a Pharmacy Operations Manager for Walgreens before accepting the position at UC Davis. I join community flu clinics whenever there's a chance. I got certified as an immunizer when the Covid shots became available last year.

I'm excited to be a part of Cypress and plan to explore the many aspects of Specialty Pharmacy. I have been in Customer Care since 2002 and my experience and skills will help me navigate the many changes that the Specialty team is undergoing.

I have a Bachelors Degree in Communication Arts from De La Salle University in the Philippines. I was a Team Manager for InfoNXX now KGB before coming to the U.S. I studied here again to become a Pharmacy Technician.

My friends find it pretty funny I think I'm funny. They describe be as a great storyteller. I can share the books I've read or kdramas I've watched and make them feel they actually read or watched it with all the emotions incorporated.

When I turned 22 my cousin and I spent a few days in Hongkong. We had peking duck on our first night. The next day,the tour guide told us not to eat chickens or peking ducks because of reported SARS. Well…

My husband and I have been together for 22 years and have known each other for 28. He was my first and last relationship. We have a baby teenager, a bossy toddler and an entitled cat.

Favorite Quote from a book: "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

Life Begins At 40

2021-10-30T22:15:00.001-07:00

When I was younger I used to say I wanted to be forty and fabulous.
Now I'm forty!

Lesson Learned

2021-09-29T19:02:00.001-07:00

Last night, I brought up my cough medicine and placed it by my bookshelf so I can take it before bedtime. Gideon and I sat side by side on the couch near the bookshelf. Out of the blue, Yohan handed me 3 origami cranes. I'm proud of it. I was busy setting up the rest to take pictures and suddenly heard a "gulp". I knew what it was and started panicking. Gideon May have accidentally ingested my cough medicine. His mouth had blue syrup which was the color of the medicine. My mind was in a blur and couldn't remember whether the bottle was opened or not since I immediately grabbed the bottle.

I wiped his mouth and gave him water immediately. I called poison control and was instructed to measure what's left of the medicine to estimate how much he ingested.

Good thing it's a brand new bottle and I only opened it the night before.

It seemed he really didn't ingest anything. Thank God.

While all these were happening, Yohan asked me what could happen if a child took a medicine double the dose. I answered direct to the point "they could die". She was quiet. She then asked "mom, do you think it's indirectly my fault because I distracted you with my origami?" How could she ask that?
I answered "no, it's my fault I wasn't watching him".

Lesson learned.

UC Davis Cypress Pharmacy

2021-08-28T10:23:00.001-07:00

I had my interview with UC Davis Specialty Pharmacy May 21, I took my exam at 7:00 am May 26, then Final Web Panel Interview June 2nd.

June 3rd, I was informed by the Pharmacy Hiring Manager that she felt I’m fit for the job but still have to do the last hiring process which was a Skills Survey from 5 of my coworkers preferably managers.

Today June 8th, I received an e-mail informing me that they would like to go forward with by application by hiring me.

Happy is an understatement! It’s always been my dream to work for a hospital and it’s a bonus that’s it’s UC Davis! They even have a separate Specialty Pharmacy that I will learn a lot from. Specialty Pharmacy usually fills high cost medications that treat complex chronic conditions.

I’m so excited for this new adventure!

Edit:

I’ve had my I-9 Verification, Health Screening and Fit test (mask) last June 21. HR said wait for further instructions, I still need to do a drug test.

Today, June 29 the Pharmacy Supervisor contracted me asking my availability after my start day of July 26. She wanted me to do 8 weeks of training.

Everything is going along fine :)

July 26 was my first day :)

Update :

Today is August 28. It’s been a month and I’m loving every bit of it. The parking lot is far from my building. I think positive and treat my walks as part of my exercise :)

I appreciate how Saline (HR) talked to us new hires. She said a lot of people worked hard to get us there. She wants to keep us :) And I plan to stay.

Costco Glasses

2020-02-03T21:51:00.001-08:00

I finally decided to have Vision insurance this year.
Sphere, Cyl
-1.25, -.250 L Axis 90
-1.00, -.250 R Axis 45

With anti blue light treatment.

01082020

2020-01-10T10:04:00.001-08:00

I've gotten an electric kettle, and instant pot as presents from my husband.

But this one was unexpected. I wanted to get one of these when we were at Costco. We didn't have the budget that day. When we went back it's gone.

Last New Year's Eve, I was staring at one of these at a Japanese grocery shop. Jeff asked me if I wanted to get it, I said no. I didn't want to spend money on NYE.

Today there was an Amazon delivery. I didn't think it's mine because Jeff and I share the same account and there's no order. Apparently he created his own account so he could get it for me. How sweet.

Ang babaw... My dream rice cooker. Hehehe

——
My coworker asked me, do you like sweets?
I said yes.
He then handed me this big a** Hershey's Kisses and said "happy birthday!" 🤣

Tough

2020-01-10T08:51:00.001-08:00

According to Gideon's Daycare, he is very tough. There's a child there that when kids get his toys, he cries and goes to Mitsue.

When kids get Gideon's toys, he doesn't cry, he goes after them and get his toys back.

Close-up of our tree

2019-12-09T12:26:00.001-08:00

Douglas Fir and Real Wreath

2019-12-09T10:22:00.001-08:00

Jeff got us a real wreath as well. We love our Douglas Fir tree.

Our First Real Christmas Tree

2019-12-09T10:19:00.001-08:00

We finally had our Christmas tree up! Jeff bought a real tree last night. It smells good :)

Teeth

2019-12-09T10:14:00.001-08:00

Look who finally has teeth?! 8 months and one week! Yay!

Don’t Blame Others

2019-11-29T11:37:00.001-08:00

Examples to make our work lives easier at work.

Don't blame others.

The day before Thanksgiving the morning staff received refrigerated item in a big white carton box. Inside was a box Fluad, flu shot.

I only noticed that evening when the manager asked for an item that might've been delivered to the pharmacy.

I immediately put it in the fridge.

Another one on the same day.

I was posting claims that evening and noticed the orders weren't posted that morning. I asked the tech to make sure. She said she posted. I wanted to believe her but the computer says differently.

So after I clocked out I checked the telxon in the office. They took ours as we're closed the next day. I found out it wasn't posted.

So the next day on Thanksgiving I called Jimmy and asked him to post 3 items. Two ABCs and one 340 B. He happily obliged.

I didn't inform the tech as I don't want to ruin her Thanksgiving.

I tried to fix it and it was resolved.

If we can make each other's lives easier, please do so.

Yoga

2019-11-03T02:14:00.001-08:00

I've been doing yoga🧘‍♀️ for awhile now. I feel like this has a more holistic approach towards my fitness regimen.

At first my goal was just to really be on my Pre-pregnancy weight without a care of what my body will look like. I want to fit in my uniform and jeans, that's all. Halfway through my yoga journey, I loved what I saw and experienced. My mindset was more peaceful, my body craved the slow movement and poses. I was more at ease. I also never thought that I'd enjoy another type of yoga called yin yoga.

I shared what I accomplished with my friends and coworkers. I brought about 5 people with me to one of my classes. I wanted them to go through the same experience. They enjoyed it a lot.

So now that I've met my initial goal. What I want is to maintain this calmness and peacefulness that I'm feeling.

I hope I'll inspire other moms who had just given birth or about to give birth that's it's possible to bounce back. We have our own phase. It may take years or months. But we'll surely get there.

This was me sucking my stomach in on both pictures 😉and feeling proud of myself. 🤗

Mommy And Gideon

2019-09-09T15:09:00.001-07:00