2Jokes.com

Fifty Bucks Is Fifty Bucks!

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 18:41:00 +0000

Ed and his wife Norma go to the state fair every year, and every year Ed would say, "Norma, I'd like to ride in that helicopter." Norma always replied, "I know Ed,but that helicopter ride is fifty...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Bar Hopping Deer

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 16:35:00 +0000

Two deer walked out of a bar. One turns to the other and says, “Man, I can’t believe I blew thirty bucks in there”. var addthis_config ={"data_track_clickback":true};

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

The 2 A.M. Lecture

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 22:56:00 +0000

A middle-aged businessman was stopped at 2 A.M. by the police, walking home in what appeared to be a drunken fashion, stumbling through the streets. The officer asked the man where he was going and...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

The Church Dinner

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 06:17:00 +0000

A group of friends from the Cottonwood Baptist Church wanted to get together on a regular basis, socialize, and play games. The lady of the house was to prepare the meal. When it came time for Al...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Remember Bill Clinton?

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 16:35:00 +0000

President Bill Clinton had just returned from a vacation in Arkansas and walked down the steps of Air Force One with two pigs under his arms. At the bottom of the steps, the honor guardsman stepped...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Doctor's Best Advice

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 07:44:00 +0000

A 60-year-old man is getting his annual physical examination. “Doc, do you think I’ll live another 40 years and reach 100 years old?” he asks. “That depends,” says the doctor. “Do you smoke?” “No,"...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

The Suspicious Rich Wife

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 19:46:00 +0000

A rich woman was sure that her husband was cheating on her, and having an affair with the maid, so she laid a trap to catch him. One evening she sent the maid home for the weekend and didn't tell...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

The Best Marriage Counselor Ever

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 05:58:00 +0000

After just a few years of marriage, filled with constant arguments, a young man and his wife decided the only way to save their marriage was to try counseling. They had been at each other's throat...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Amish At The Mall

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 16:19:00 +0000

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a nearby mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny silver walls that moved apart and back together again by...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

She Needs A Banking Bailout!

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 06:35:00 +0000

A young college woman came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!" "I did? What did I tell you?" asked the dad. "You told me to put my money in the bank,...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

You Can't Take It With You

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 16:31:00 +0000

An old man was on his death bed, and wanted to be buried with his money. He called his priest, his doctor and his lawyer to his bedside. "Here's $30,000 cash to be held by each of you. I trust you to...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

How Not To Get Into Heaven

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 16:23:00 +0000

Three men die in a car accident on Christmas Eve. They all find themselves at the Pearly Gates waiting to enter Heaven. St. Peter tells them that he can assure them of getting into Heaven if they...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

The New Maid

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 08:07:00 +0000

A man calls his home and a strange woman answers. The guy says, "Who is this?" "This is the maid," answers the woman. "We don't have a maid," says the man. The woman says, "I was hired this morning...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

In Mourning

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Sun, 04 Dec 2011 17:16:00 +0000

A man was visiting a graveyard and had started back for his car, parked on the cemetery road. His attention was caught by another man kneeling at a grave. The other man seemed to be praying with...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

How Business Really Works

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Sat, 03 Dec 2011 16:47:00 +0000

Father To Son Dad - I want you to marry a girl I have chosen for you. Son - Dad, I want to choose my own wife. Dad - She is the daughter of Bill Gates. Son - Okay. Dad Goes To Bill Gates Dad - I...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Meet The Parents

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 22:45:00 +0000

A young man looking to get married told his friend, "Every woman I bring home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like." "Oh, that's easy," his pal replied. "All you have to do is find someone...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

The Missing Husband

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 01:14:00 +0000

A wife went to the police station with her next door neighbor to report that her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description. The wife described him... "He's 35 years old, 6 foot 4,...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Where Old Money Goes To Die

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 01:11:00 +0000

At the US Treasury they were about to burn old worn out bills. It happened that a $20 bill and a $1 bill were on the way to the furnace when they began to chat. The $20 bill said, "Well, I guess I...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Time Change!

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 14:48:00 +0000

I went and visited an old friend. I think he is losing it. He was applying black shoe polish to his penis. I yelled at him "You're supposed to turn your clock back!" var addthis_config...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

A Math Problem

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 22:50:00 +0000

IF 1 = 5 2 = 25 3 = 125 4 = 625 5 = ? Scroll down for Answer ------------------------------ The answer is 1 Remember the first line? 1 = 5 ? var addthis_config...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Tampons And Cigarettes.

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 22:46:00 +0000

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Consoling A Friend

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 13:24:00 +0000

A guy was trying to console a friend who'd just found his wife in bed with another man. "Get over it, buddy," he said. "It's not the end of the world." "It's all right for you to say," answered...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Little Johnny's Manners

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 14:40:00 +0000

The teacher asked Michael, "If you were on a date, having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the restroom?" "Just a minute, I have to go pee," he said....

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Viagra And Prozac Combination Pill

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Thu, 06 Oct 2011 15:43:00 +0000

A drug company just announced they had created a new pill that combines all the best qualities of Viagra and Prozac. Apparently if you don't get to fuck, you don't give a fuck! var addthis_config...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!

Computer Error

noreply@blogger.com (Robot Nine) — Wed, 05 Oct 2011 22:12:00 +0000

As we Silver Surfers know, sometimes we have trouble with our computers. I had a problem yesterday, so I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked...

Visit 2Jokes.com for this joke in full, and a ton of other funny jokes!