Your friends and family want to see you succeed. They want to see you happy. If not for yourself at least push yourself to succeed for them. ~ Unknown ~

Are Your Friends Pushing You?

Sometimes the people closest to you seem the most critical. They tell you that you can do more. They seem to praise others and not you, and you wonder why.

Perhaps you wonder what is wrong with you. Maybe you wonder what is wrong with them. If you take a step back you might see things a bit differently, you might also notice something different in what they do.

People crave appreciation and respect, especially from friends. If the friend praises others and not you, you may find it really upsetting. Yet, there are moments when they do praise you. It may be as small as one word, yet the word is powerful.

Start watching, when they praise you. You may notice that the small words are strong. They reserve the praise for moments when you need them or when you accomplish something. One word praise is leaked out on occasion. Perhaps, they give you sudden and unexpected praise.

It could be they push you to do more. Perhaps they want you to try more things in life and tell you that you could do more. It may not be with words they push you to do more, but in what they want you to do, or suggest.

This may be your friend’s way of pushing you to succeed. Too often people do not realize, their own power. They see you are capable of more than you realize, so they push you. Look, and you might be surprised to see they see you more clearly than you see yourself. ~ MJ Schrader

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Your friends and family see your real power, push to bring it forth .   ~ The Divine

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I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love. ~ Mother Teresa ~

Don’t Wait- Give Love Now

Author unknown

I would rather have one small rose
From the garden of a friend
Than to have the choicest flowers
When my stay on Earth must end.

I would rather have one pleasant word
In kindness said to me
Than flattery when my heart is still
And my life on Earth has ceased to be.

I would rather have a loving smile
From friends I know are true
Than tears shed round my casket
When this world I’ve bid Adieu.

Bring me all your flowers today
Whether pink, white or red:
I’d rather have one blossom now
Than a truckload when I’m dead.

~ Author unknown

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Spread love now, because the sooner you share love the sooner you get it back.   ~ The Divine

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Every conquering temptation represents a new fund of moral energy. Every trial endured and weathered in the right spirit makes a soul nobler and stronger than it was before. ~ William Butler Yeats ~

Tempting World

The temptation is there. You know what you should do. Yet the temptation is so close, and you want it. Just a little, you say. But when and where do you stop? Or do you suddenly say afterwards, next time I’ll be better?

It doesn’t matter what your temptation is. You may have a thing for “Bejeweled Blitz,” it’s only a minute. Of course after you play it a dozen times that is a more than a minute. It could be the candy that you “need” just one piece of, yet you eat more than one. Perhaps you plan to watch just a few minutes of a TV show, and then hours later you wonder what happened.

Temptations are part of being alive. If you can keep them under control then it is not an issue. The control or rather lack there of is what causes problems. Then it is up to you to decide if you can learn to control your temptations in little doses or find a way to avoid them entirely.

Everyone is unique and what may work for one person, may not for another. If the only way you can control a temptation is to avoid it completely, then do it. Alternatively you may be able to use a timer and set it to go off when your video game time is up. You can reward yourself for eating pasta only once a week.

You regret when you fall too hard for your temptations.  This sets you up for failure, find a way to reward yourself.  Rewards work better for long term success. ~ MJ Schrader

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Fighting temptation may be hard, but you have the tools to win.  You just need to find the tools that work for you!  ~ The Divine

Face new challenges, seize new opportunities, test your resources against the unknown and in the process, discover your own unique potential. ~ John Amatt  ~

Challenge Completed!

The 30 Days of 30 Day Challenges is complete!  If you embraced one of the early challenges you may be able to say “Challenge Completed!” soon.   But after you complete your challenge, it is not time to slack.  Take one or more of the challenges for this new month. Each month you could take take a couple of challenges from this blog and a few for next year.

Or you could embrace other challenges as well. With each month ending you could have learned new skills, learned more about yourself, learned new habits or broken old habits. And by the end of the year, you will have achieved at least a dozen small goals.

These small commitments are stepping stones you can use for improvement throughout your life. Your one month change is short enough you can practice something and know an end date is coming. If you decide, you can keep the change going for months, years or embrace it for a lifetime.

Each of these challenges has been about challenging yourself. Perhaps the way you think, perhaps the way you interact with people. It may make a change in what you do or how you do things. The challenge part cultivates your thinking, and gives your mind other possibilities.

After you say “Challenge Completed,” start a new one.  Find one here. Create your own. Help orphans and the writers at 365 by challenging all your friends to buy our book. Hey, it’s a challenge that helps us! Life is about fun and learning, remember those and you will succeed.  ~ MJ Schrader

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Challenge your own status quo, you’ll be glad you did.   ~ The Divine

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The Future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.  ~ C.S. Lewis ~

43,200 Minutes In Your Control

Every 30 days you have 43,200 minutes. Everyone does. How someone uses them varies by the person and their commitment to the future and goals. You choose how you spend your minutes, even when you think your schedule is full.

A minute angry is a minute that you are not happy. A minute obsessing over the negative things is a minute that is not positive. A minute hating what you are doing is a minute that is not spent in joy. These are all choices you can make each minute.

The free time you spend with people you don’t trust or are not certain if they are friends is not going to be time you remember. Spend time with family and friends with whom you enjoy spending time. Make more effort to connect with people who life your spirits and light your smile.

Delaying activities you must do, does not help you. Get them done. Then you can move on to activities you enjoy. Hoping the cats will change their own cat litter will not happen!

Keep moving forward. Yes, you may trip. Things may not work, but as long as you keep getting up and moving forward you will get to the goals.

If you spend the next 30 days thinking about the minutes in your life you will see a major change at the end. Finding more laughter will be easier. Smiling and dreaming will seem natural. A great way to spend your next 43,000 minutes.  ~ MJ Schrader

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Get the most from your life… take control over your time.   ~ The Divine

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Time is free, but it’s priceless. You can’t own it, but you can use it. You can’t keep it, but you can spend it. Once you’ve lost it you can never get it back. ~ Harvey MacKay ~

30 Days of Living in Real Time

photo by bethan

You know the person who says “give me just 5 more minutes” which translates to at least half an hour. Before you point your finger at someone consider your own sense of time. It may be in one area or multiple areas that your sense of time is off, but these are areas where either your time disappears or people seem upset with you.

Your friends hate waiting the half an hour you mean when you say you need 5 more minutes to get ready. They will show the impatience in their faces or in their irritated voices or they may even tell you. While that may not be where your 5 minutes means much more, there are other areas.

It doesn’t matter if it something you enjoy or need to do. The point is notice your actual time. If your 30 minute walk or exercise routine is actually 45 minutes, you need to admit that time. The same if your 15 minute bedtime routine is actually 30 minutes. This is 15 minutes that you need to take into account when you schedule your activities for the day.

Watch your real time spent over the next 30 days, and adjust your time references. In most cases it is not the amount of time that it takes to do the task that is the problem. The problem is you need to admit the real time.    It will help you schedule your day better, it will help others who must wait on you. ~ MJ Schrader

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Be honest with your time, for others and yourself.  The honesty is a time winner.   ~ The Divine

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Everything you want in life has a price connected to it. There’s a price to pay if you want to make things better, a price to pay just for leaving things as they are, a price for everything. ~ Harry Browne ~

30 Days of Business Building

Business building does not sound like a personal transformation type thing. While you ponder this, consider the fact that we just sold you on reading this post. You paid us with your time. Building your business is also how you build who you are, and how you sell yourself to others.

When you get dressed for the day, you choose clothes based on the weather and today’s activities. As you meet people through the day, people assess your clothes and make judgments. Even if you think people do not, think about the variety of clothes you could be wearing.

The yoga clothes send quite a different message than the outfit you wear to funerals. The comfortable clothes you wear when you are sick is far different from the clothes you wear when you are meeting friends for a night out. Going to ski slopes in a swimsuit would be considered strange.

The clothes are part of selling your day to yourself and to the world. Your attitude changes with each of these events. These factors and many others are part of the salesletter you present to strangers to sell them on becoming a co-worker, a friend or more. You are selling your family on your health, your happiness, even on your relationship with them.

Now you should see business is much closer to your life than you realize. You have been selling all your life. In the next 30 days, watch the message you are selling. Find ways to build your business and you will experience growth in multiple areas of your personal life. ~ MJ Schrader

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Build your personal business and your life will grow.   ~ The Divine

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You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy. ~ Jane Roberts ~

30 Days of Self Love

No, we aren’t talking about anything that should make you blush. Then again maybe it will. Another 30 day challenge is about being honest with yourself and how you should stop the self critic, but this challenge is different.

Over the next 30 days, love yourself. This means being the sweetheart, the romantic soul, the love of your life, to you. You deserve to treat yourself with kindness, compassion and love. Making this small change is one that can change how others perceive of you.

When you love yourself, you will be kinder to you. You also will not allow others to abuse you or mistreat you. Instead of hiding your beauty, skills and talents you will let them shine. People will see you differently because you will see yourself differently.

How do I love myself?

Lean in close to your mirror. Lean so close you are looking deep into your eyes. Compliment that person. Tell the person all the things you admire about them. If you can’t think of what you admire, think of what others have said they admire about you. Say it those handsome (or beautiful) eyes staring back at you.

Write yourself love notes. Keep a daily journal with your successes. Find little ways to pamper yourself. Make some time to enjoy something you normally consider luxury time spent. Use that cocoa you save for “special occasions.”  Do not let people use you or abuse you. Ask for help instead of trying to be the super hero who can do it all. You are worth it and after 30 days you will see a lot more things to love about you. ~ MJ Schrader

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Love the person in the mirror, and what others think won’t matter.  Your true light will shine.  ~ The Divine

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In thinking, keep to the simple. In conflict, be fair and generous. In governing, don’t try to control. In work, do what you enjoy. In family life, be completely present.
~ Lao Tzu ~

30 Days of KISS-ing

Anything you do can be made complicated. People seem to be skilled at making the simple things into complicated matters. While you may think you are not guilty of it, you might want to look at your life and see if that really is true. You may need to kiss your life, and Keep It Simple and Sincere.

You may love washing your dishes before using your dishwasher, but for most dishwashers this is an unnecessary step. If it is necessary, you could wash your dishes by hand and use the dishwasher for sanitizing or as a drying rack. There are probably other areas of your life where you do redundant tasks, look for the redundancies and eliminate them.

Perhaps you make your relationships more complicated than they should be. If you don’t want to be friends with someone, don’t. If you must socialize with someone you do not trust, remember you can talk about movies, the weather and other small talk. This can be used with co-workers and family members. You are under no obligation to share more information than will keep you sincere.

It could be that you need to reduce the number of steps in your habits. Change up your tasks to keep it simple. Creating a list to reduce your driving back and forth while running errands or at the store is one way to keep it simple.

A month full of KISS-ing should be a month of fun. Just Keep It Simple and Sincere and you can reduce your stress and maybe even add an element of fun.  ~ MJ Schrader

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Sincere efforts towards sincerity and simplicity will shower your life with sanity and success.  ~ The Divine

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Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.
~ Brian Tracy ~

30 Days Dancing on the Edge

The boundaries of your skills may be very visible lines in your mind or not. These limits are set in your mind by the space, people, environment and skills you are accustomed to having. While you may not see the lines physically, you can feel them when you step outside them. That uncomfortable even scary feeling is a good thing.

You already know change is part of life, if you become so stuck on the way things are, you are can’t change as life does. If you want to reach your goals and dreams, it requires expanding the current comfort zone you have. Yet, none of this can happen if you are content with staying in your comfort zone.

By accepting some time being uncomfortable you can push your limits. You may be scared, but dancing on the edges of your limits you force yourself to expand, in skills, knowledge and much more. Yes, you may face new dangers, but you will also find new adventures waiting for you.

As you stretch your perceived limits you will find more and more is inside your comfort zone. Going back to your old limits will be unacceptable because you know you are capable of so much more.

Over the next 30 days, dance on the edge. Talk to a stranger. Stand up for something you believe in. Learn something new. Speak in front of an audience. Read a book on a subject you would normally wouldn’t read. Find something different and dance on the edge.

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Until you dance on the edge you are just surviving.  Dance and live.   ~ The Divine

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