The 400 pound mile

2009-05-21T19:54:00.000-07:00

Hello everyone

I must say. The journey of the last 3 years has been incredible. I have seen much and have experieneced even more. I have had friends stand by me, friends leave me, and people who don't even know they helped me come and go. As it is, I have been putting off comming back to this blog so a few reasons. Mainly was that it was a mark of failure. I failed even when putting as much effort as I could into this.

But, with that said, I can come back now I think. When I started this blog I was sitting at a whopping 412 pounds or so. I lost a bit, got sidetracked, got addicted to WoW, didn't care and balooned up to 460 pounds.

There I was August of 2008 in my parents basement playing video games, with no real education sitting at 460 pounds and 23 years old. Pretty much rock bottom. With the help of my mom I wrote my GED, passed and applied to Fanshawe College. After going to Fanshawe I realised I couldn't sit in any of the desks. So I started walking some more, trying to shed some weight.

The major turning point was sitting at a friends house looking at old pictures and people going "wow, what happened Tyler". What did happen indeed. This was the point I commited myself to a life change.

Now, 8 months later I am down to 325 pounds from the 460 I was last August. Life is better, I am healthier and I feel as though I can come back here and post my thoughts without feelings of regret. Hopefully if you have come here, this blog can show you something. The true struggle people who are overweight feel. It is a diary, or a window into the souls of the pains we go through, the highs and lows and truly the mental state this issue puts us in.

Thank you again for everything.

- Tyler

WooT New Place!

2007-01-07T21:18:00.000-08:00

Well sorry for the few days there. I did alot of crap this week!.

First and foremost I signed the lease on my new place. I am finally moving out of my parents house. It only took me 4 days of searching and I found the perfect place. It is 10 minutes from work and 15 mins from school walking. Right now work is 2 hours from work and 2 hours from school walking, or an hour and a half on the bus each way. This will make my life by far much easier to manage.

I also managed to put in 65 hours this week. Combined with 60 hours last week and all the stat holidays I will have the cash for first and last! =)

I have been keeping to the gym, working up my endurance and will be getting some help with a workout this Friday. I am planning to play football at University so will be working towards getting into shape for that.

I need to go pack, I'll post pictures of the new place once I move in, February 1st. =)

Can I cut off my legs please?

2007-01-02T21:28:00.000-08:00

Yep thats right. Chop em right off, throw em in the trash. I'll cycle with my hands if I have too!

I went back to the gym today for the first time in forever. It was also the first time since I canceled WoW. And the first time I've done any actual real excersize since I started WoW. Needless to say I am sore. I feel like every bone in my body is crying and I just want to roll over and die.

Btw...

The workout lasted 10 minutes....

Thats right, 10 minutes on a cross trainer and I was ready to die.

I think my muscles started deteriorating, just slowly died away as they were not needed to play WoW. In 7 years I am predicting a mass influx of wheelchairs for WoW players, all 7 million+ will need them, since we do...nothing.

So what does this tell me?

That I am literally in the worst shape of my life. I have never, never been not able to do less than 30 minutes on thos machines. I could usually do an hour fine. So here I am, worst shape ever.

So what now? I mean, ouch, 10 minutes and I die?

Well for that motivation we will go to a picture of a good friend of mine...

Tom

Tom was wheelchair bound and on oxygen. Now he bikes regularly for a few hundred miles a week.

Here will be my motivation to get back into shape.

So I will post tomorrow, and let you all know how it went, how many minutes I did.

10 minutes...

sigh..

To Love Life, 2007 Commeth

2006-12-31T05:10:00.000-08:00

And so this year finally comes to an end. Goodbye 2006, a year of hard lessons, one that I think had made me, and many people grow wiser and one that has prepared us for 2007. A new year full of possibilities and new things to do, hold onto and create.

So what have I learned from 2006, what lessons has it taught me in life?

Number one, is never to take anything for granted. Joey and I went through a few scary momments with each other where I thought I could, might lose her to health issues and other things. Every time we bounced back and stayed together. Each time I realised how empty I feel without her and how thankfull I am for her. As well my mother, who is suffering from MS. I am thankful for her and have learned to not take for granted the everyday things I hold little value too. These two people have kept me grounded and aware of the little things life has to offer and that I should appreciate.

Number two is procrastination is the death of all of us. How often do we all use excuses like "after this show", "after this game," "Im just going to finish this first". One of the hardest things I have done in my life is admit to myself I was doing nothing with it, and admit it honestly.

Thirdly we have games. My struggle that I pray will be put behind me. Gaming is not wrong, it is an entertainment to keep us amused of course, and due to that it is not wrong. It is only when you begin cancelling commitments you have that it steps over the bounds of a entertainment to an addiction. Playing for 2 hours a night when you have nothing else to do is fine. When you are skiping school and work, avoiding friends to play and putting off homework to get that last piece of equipment is when it becomes an addiction. This would be the hardest lesson 2006 taught me, and one of the cruelest. A lesson well learned though.

New years resolutions I think always fail. We always have these huge expectations of what we want. Every year we put it down into writing and strive for it with all we are!

For about 2-3 weeks.

Than we are done with that.

I have many plans for this year, for 2007. I plan to make this a year to look back on and go "That was a golden year". The only resolution I have that I will put down in writting is this.

I will grab life by the horns and ride it for all its worth. I will experience life and taste its feast with all I am, and when 2008 comes, I will have a hundred stories of laughter and sadness perhaps to share. I will be able to look back on 2007 and say "That was a year I want to live over and over". For 2007, my resolution will be

To love life.

Where to begin

2006-12-28T22:56:00.000-08:00

I have come back to that which made me feel good about myself again. Christmas is a time of reflection, and one of looking back on things you have done, and trying to figure out where you went wrong.

Willpower is a funny thing, go to a speech and you can be motivated for a lifetime, a year, a month, a week, a day, or even no more than an hour. What do you do when the motivation runs out? You can continue to find new motivation of course, as much as you can. Eventually though, the same things keep motivating you and than you find that nothing can any longer.

I myself have an addictive personality when it comes to my time. I don't become addicted to chemicals, such as smoking, drugs or drinking. Time sinks seem to addict me though like nothing else can. Games are the perfect time sinks and those seem to be my weakness. The last entry in this blog was made at the same time that I started playing World of Warcraft.

World of Warcraft is a beautiful game, made from perfection as Blizzard is known for doing. It is also a time sink. I do not blame the game for any of my undoings, I myself did not have the willpower needed to juggle life and the game as many do.

So I come back to the crossroad. I have gained back the weight I lost, but am motivated to start again. Hopefully with this new sense of knowing of why my motivation failed I will not be motivated by the thought of being motivated any longer.

In the words of one of my favorite persons in the world

GIT-R-DONE

What a weekend

2006-08-23T08:12:00.000-07:00

Well this weekend was my brothers 19th's birthday. In Canada that means he is of legal age to drink, so we spent most of the weekend drinking. I overdid it and spent all of yesterday sick with the shakes ect. That is what I get for not drinking for so long, than drinking as much as I did in such a short period. So with that said the diet went to crap over the weekend. I am back to eating clean today.

Will be getting my bodyfat checked this Friday and will start meauring my progress that way. I start class in 2 weeks which will be fun. I have been getting up at 11am-12pm the last 3 weeks and will now start getting up at 7. I will update again later as I need to go get ready for work.

1 week

2006-08-17T12:10:00.000-07:00

Well today marks the 1st week of my diet, and I have to say I feel pretty good. I have more or less stuck too it (save 1 cheat meal of Alfredo pasta..mmmmm) and I am feeling damn proud of myself heh. Tommorow morning I start Cardio at the gym daily. I plan on doing that for a week before getting back into weightlifting so we will see what happens with that.

Came across an interesting article last night on BBC

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4793455.stm

There are now more overweight people across the world than hungry ones, according to experts.

He told the International Association of Agricultural Economists the number of overweight people had topped 1bn, compared with 800m undernourished.

Now this to me was really suprising. Who would have seen this one comming 20 years ago? Where the world hunger would be starting to be cured, only to be replaced by world obesity.

The author of the article than went on to suggest this

He said food prices could be used to manipulate people's diets and tilt them towards healthier options.

"For instance, if we charge money for every calorie of soft drink and fruit drink that was consumed, people would consume less of it. "If we subsidise fruit and vegetable production, people would consume more of it and we would have a healthier diet."

So his issue is that the food that makes us fat is always the cheapest.

So tonight, I am going to compare prices of a day of meals and see if he is correct. I personally think it is more laziness and people not wanting to take 30-45 minutes a day to cook food properly. I will post my results tommorow. :)

The path we choose

2006-08-15T00:33:00.000-07:00

One thing that needs to understood in this fight of weight that we find ourselves is this. What works for me, might not work for you, and probably will not. Yes, you can take some of what I do an apply it to your life, but in reality you are not me, and I am not you. Some people such as Tom decided to lose weight doing something he loved, cycling. Personally, due to Tom, I love cycling now as well, but that will not be the cornerstone of my weight loss. (Though it will be of my Cardio). Tom lost a ton of weight, doing something he loved, and it worked for him. As I went through a phase though where I researched bicycles, I found at least 10 failures for every Tom if not more. I count myself in that group, as I had to find something else. This is not to say what Tom did is wrong, on the contrary, he can serve as motivation to us all that it is possible.

Running is another example. I am the type of person who when he sees something, dives head in, immerses and learns everything he can about it before deciding whether it is right for him or not. In Running there are tons of success stories out there. People who went from 400 pounds, bedridden and on oxygen to running marathons. You can sit back and go wow, maybe this is for me, and than give it a shot. You will either succeed or fail.

The point of this, is if you try and copy someone else, you will not succeed. These people found something they loved and stuck with it. I choose weightlifting, or bodybuilding as some people call it. The reasons are numerous, to list the main ones though would probably be in this order.

1.) Health

If I train my body to work as a well oiled machine it will, and due to the mixture of Cardio/Weights I feel it will get there.

2 .) Looks

Now, call me shallow if you want, but the main reason the majority of us are changing now is because we want to look better. The defined bodies that come along with successful bodybuilders is something I want.

3.) The Gym

This is probably a major reason. I am lucky, that I actually love the gym, love weights, love the cardio machines. I love being surrounded by people who all have one goal in mind, to better themselves through hard work and determination.

I was asked in an email, Tyler, why do you want to look like those huge bodybuilders on stage.

To answer that, I never will. Those guys have been lifting for 10-20 years, and are much much more dedicated than I ever will be. My goal is not to have 25 inch arms and be ripped enough for a show. My goal is to be able to run to the corner without thinking I will die. To be able to take my shirt off at the beach and feel proud of what I did. To go into the gym, and know this is my second home. To get my goals, I choose weightlifting. My path might not be your path, but everyone has something. Beating this battle are three main things, mentality, diet and exercise. We need to find a variation of the three that works for us. It is never wrong to take someone else as motivation, but if you try what they did and fail, keep looking. You will fall in love with something out there that will help you reach your goals

My diet

2006-08-13T12:44:00.000-07:00

Here is the diet I will be following for the next m0nth. This is about 600 Calories under maintenance calories. Add in the cardio and the weightloss and I will be significantly under maintenance. Just so you know, this will not be my life diet, but to lose weight I will do drastic things. I have stuck to this for about 3 days now, so we will see what happens. Loving it so far. :)

================================================== =======
7am

1 cup egg whites 26.5/1.8/.04 126
1 whole egg 11.1/2.2/12.2 166
20g of Cheese 4/.5/6 54.2
1 cup of oatmeal 15/81/6 300
Coffee (with milk and splenda)

646 Calories

56.5/90/25
================================================== =======

10am

Proteing Shake 23/2.1/1.7 112
2 Cup of milk 17/24/9.5 250

40/26.1/11.2

362

================================================== =======

1 pm

1 Can of Tuna 35.2/0/1.13 160.08
Pita Bread Whole Wheat 8.33/46.75/2.21 226

chopped onion
garlic
mustard
Red peppers
Lettuce

I didn't measure those things, as they are too miniscule.

43/47/3

386
================================================== =======
4pm

Pre-Workout

Proteing Shake 23/2.1/1.7 112
Banana 1.22/27.65/.5 108.56
2 cups of milk 17/24/9.5 250

41/53.1/11.7

418

================================================== =======

5:30pm

Post Workout

Protein Shake W/Water 23/2.1/1.7 112
1 Chicken breast 43/0/5 230
Cup of brown rice 5/44.7/1.75 216

66/44/3
558

================================================== =======

8:00pm

2 Chicken breast 86.8/0/10 462
1 Sweet Potatoe 2/32/0 139

88/32/10 601
================================================== =======

Total for the day

2971 Calories

334 g of Proteing
292 g of Carbs
63 g of Fat

Phase 2

2006-08-12T13:43:00.000-07:00

Well hello to everyone again. This is the second phase of my weightloss. The first was the go for it try, and obviously fail, we all knew it would happen, as it always does. For the final push I am going to do a mixture of what worked for me well in the past and what I love to do now. So what pushed me over the edge perhaps? What gave me the will to do this?

My supervisor Paul had a heart attack last week, scared the shit out of me. Paul is only 30, and already had a heart attack, the scary part was Paul leads the same lifestyle as me more or less.

So I am going back into bodybuilding, it was what helped me so much the first time, when I droped 75 pounds and went from size 48 pants to 38. I am going back to that with a mixture of cycling. I love weights, and the feeling of pushing my muscles more and more, so I am going back to that. This might not be for everyone, hopefully, If I succeed you can sit back and go "Well Tyler failed and came back and did it, I can too!"

So that is what this is going to come down to. Balls to the wall, no hype, no jumping for joy, I am sitting here looking at the path. I think I have come to the realisation, and the feeling that is it, It is not that I don’t want to be fat anymore, I am jus tired of it, and it is time to do something about it. People say quiting smoking is useless, unless you actually want to quit, unless the idea that smoking disgusts you, and to be honest, the idea of being fat disgusts me. So this is it.

I need a belt!

2006-07-05T16:14:00.000-07:00

Well, well, here I am this morning getting dressed for school, (6am is such a evil evil hour to have to wake up too) and as I am putting my pants on I notice something. I need a belt!
That is right, my pants are loose. They are able to breathe, my gut and the button on them are thanking me for making things less snug. No more will I have to worry about a button putting someones eye out when I bend over, no more will I have to worry about the crotch of them ripping, setting my face into a deep red as I run for cover. From this day forward I will be able to stand tall and not sucking my gut in...as my pants finally need a belt.

Now I will go looking for a belt, perhaps even a belt buckle. (Damn those country songs and there influence on me). So this weekend, I will go belt shopping and find a belt to hold my now loose pants up.

On another note, I am not sure if any of you have noticed but the blogsphere seems to slow down during the summer. I am too a victim of this, and why I made no promise to update daily, as I am sooooo busy with work, school, cycling, swimming, sleeping that the only time I get to blog is from work. Though, to be fair, I am not giving up on the weight loss. Actually as you can see from the columns above it is working out rather well again so far.

I found some old pictures of me, back from 2003. I was 150 pounds light than. At the time I remember thinking I was fat, now looking back I only wish I was that fat again. Either way, that picture is my motivation for the week.

Well, I am back to work now, I am back in class in the morning so time is really tight right now.

Anyone else have any summer activities they are doing this summer to loose weight?

Happy Canada Day!

2006-06-30T12:51:00.000-07:00

Happy Canadian day!

Happy Canada day!

Well, tomorrow is Canada day. So to all my fellow Canadians, HAPPY CANADA DAY!

Canada first began a 1867, a lil country to the North of our neighbors the US of A. Canadian to come

Here is Canada, we canucks like to think, rightly or wrongly a few things. Well, 4 things.

1.) Our Beer is the best (which it is)

2.) Our woman are the hottest (which they are)

3) Hockey is the only real sport in the world worth skipping work for (which it is)

4) We are the politest (Unless your hockey team beats us ( see number 3)

I was thinking of going to get my Canadian tattoo tomorrow, sort of like a right of passage for Canadians.
Or perhaps just Canadian students?
Do you guys think a maple leaf with "Made in Canada"?

Canada day will be spent a bit at work (time and a half baby!) and drinking, what will you guys be doing this weekend?

Either way guys, happy Canada Day, stay safe, don't drink and drive. Forget about the diet for a few days or two and just enjoy being Canadian for a weekend!

Tom is down 350 pounds!

2006-06-29T15:30:00.000-07:00

Congrats Tom!

My friend Tom who was featured on MSN's top blogs created a video showing his walk in pictures of his weight loss

Tom lost over 350 pounds through a combination of surgery, excersize, diet and willpower.

Here is a link to his blog that features the video.

Tom's Blog and Video

On a side not I want to say a big thank you to everyone who left comments. It was awsome to hear from you guys and know that people still come around. One big comment that hit home was from Taz there. She mentioned my trip to Europe should be a major motivation, and she is right. I really don't feel like paying for two airplane tickets. So starting tomorrow I will join the multitude of posting my daily diet on my blog with my posts. I usually tried to avoid this as I wanted my blog to be different but maybe you guys can see my diet and make some suggestions?

Thanks again for all the support guys.

Motivation comes from within

2006-06-27T12:29:00.000-07:00

Wow...its hot and humid

So Sunday and today Tuesday I biked too and from work. Last time I did this was 4 weeks ago, and it was relativelyeasy. A major difference is the temperature between now and four weeks ago. Four weeks ago it was about 16 Celsius(60.8F) this week it is 32 (89.6F). Now for some of you that might not be hot, but with the humidity it is about 40 (104F). So I am killing myself doing my 12 miles around 1pm in the day on the way to work. For those that don'tknow 1pm is the time of the day here when the sun is at its highest. So I am a crispy brown now (Or my eyes are so sunblinded the red looks brown.) Anyway, as tiring as it is, I am sure that eventually I will start getting that biker highagain, where I'm on cloud 9 for most of the day after the ride, and not on cloud pillow where I want to be after the ride today.

So in other news, now that biking has started again, I am also swimming. I'm not sure if I'm swimming because of the health benefits, or because it is soooo damn hot. So I am swimming daily, perhaps not for the right reasons, but still excersize. I plan to startthe couch to 5k program this week. Eventually, not totally sure when, but this week you will see a post where I started it.

I am guessing I should go to the gym soon and get weighed and perhaps touch base with my personal trainer. I am kinda leery aboutgetting on the scale, for the fear of gaining too much weight.

Well off to work

Oh..and Switzerland lost :(

2006-06-24T13:02:00.000-07:00

Good Day All! And Welcome back

Hello everyone

Well more than likely most of the regular readers no longer read, its been a while. Well simply put, I stopped. I quit working out and dieting. Alot of things changed, more than likely I just lost my motivation as happens from time to time. Or maybe the motivation was for the wrong reasons and therefore would just disappear at one point or another. I needed or still need to do some soul searching, maybe find what direction my life needs to go into. I have some goal of course, like we all do. University in 2007, Europe for Feb2007-August2007. These are major goals of course, my problem is how do I reach them? I have some idea, and am working on that, but nothing that motivates me. The problem with motivation is you really in the end need it to come from yourself. I can get motivation from Tom, from a few people I know that have lost weight, and some of you can get motivations from me. This obviously helps, but what happens when that motivation runs dry? If you don't have a will in yourself to change you won't.

So what have I done on my own so far?

I gave up gaming. I am at the point where I have the time to play games, yet I don't. This I think will change my life.

I won't make any promises of posting everyday. This time the motivation is coming from myself, the only one I can really get motivation from.

As a final note..

Go Switzerland!

2006-05-25T11:47:00.000-07:00

Internet is back finally!

So after alot of trouble with blogger, than the internet, than blogger again I am back. Sooo much has happened in the last week and a bit, all of it good of course.

Firstly, just wanted to say thank you to those that dropped kind words to me and asked about me, it means alot o know people are still thinking about me. :)

So I got a new seat for the bike and have been commuting daily now since the day after my birthday. So far this week I have put in 90 miles.

So, in a little over 3 months I have gone from someone who got winded walking a block to the bus stop to someone biking over 23 miles a day. Much thanks goes to Tom, and everyone at BikeJournal and Bikeforums who put up with my endless questions on how to do this.

As a side to biking, besides the sore legs I am feeling awsome. My mood is always happy, I'm interacting with people alot more, excersize does wonders for people.

I have been working alot as well, going f40-50 hours a week. I have decided I want to go to Europe and backpack it before University, so that is a new goal of mine, which on the other side, will motivate my weight loss goals even more. I am hopefully going to be landing in London and starting my trek out from there. So over the next few months you should see some posts dedicated to that.

I got a new trainer at the gym, his name is Chris, so he will be training me from now on weights wise. I met some of his other clients first and they have all had amazing results so far. They all agreed on one thing though, that you need to put in a ton of effort to make it work, if you don't put the effort in, nothing will happen.

So I will be going back to my post a day starting today, thanks again everyone for putting up with me. :)

Anyone been to Europe lately? :D

2006-05-12T09:39:00.000-07:00

Birthday day!!

Sooo today I turn 21. Just figured I would drop in and tell all you guys. I will be doing a follow up post tonight when the day is done. :)

2006-05-11T13:25:00.000-07:00

Bike seat from hell and hill torture

Sorry for the disappearing again, I have been soooo busy this week.

I guess Ill start it off last Friday. I went and picked up a bike from Walmart. 100$, comes with a 90 day warranty. I figured I'm a big enough guy, I will be using that warranty. Also picked up a helmet, water bottle/holder, a light, gloves and a lock. The accessories came to as much as the bike!

So 200$ later I take the bike home and there it sits all day Saturday. Sunday comes around and we do a little tinkering with the bike, fixing the seat height, tightening things, making it all fit.

So comes the big day Sunday...

Sunday I start to commute for the first time ever. 12 miles one way. I leave the house at 1:10pm heading to the gym which is a mile from my work. 1:30 comes around and I realize this stock seat from Walmart is hell. It takes me an hour and 20min to go the 11 miles to the gym, mostly due to the fact the seat was hurting so much. So as I am pedalling along in pain, I realize the second mistake I made.

I went along highbury ave, which in London is a pretty big road, it is also a hilly road. So here I am, first time on a bike in years, first time working out in a few weeks, huffing and puffing up a hill, on the verge of a heart attack, stroke and busting a lung open all at the same time.

And that was only halfway up the first hill.

After walking most of them ;) I Finally get a sort of flat road that takes me to the gym. I get to the gym, change, and start heading back towards work.

This is where I realize that nice flat road was actually a downhill grade road. So in the seat from hell than is trying to become one with my bowels, I push along that hill and finally make it to work around 3:20.

That was just the way there, the best was yet to come.

As I am pulling out after my shift, heading home, my seat becomes loose. It shifts up and down with my weight. On top of that the seat hurts already. I more or less walked the bike home, save for the downhills where I coasted down. It was a long long walk home. On the bright side, I found a old Road Bike that had been left out for trash, and walked that home.

Well that is enough for today, I commuted today too, but I will share that story later.

Thanks for all your support guys.

2006-05-04T12:56:00.000-07:00

Good Job Joey and Mrs.Stormcrowe

Congratulations to both my girlfriend Joey and Tom's wife Mrs.Stormcrowe. They both had surgery this past well and both came out fine, with both surgeries successful.

I know myself and Tom have been stressed to the max over this and are both relieved to have this behind us. You can visit Tom's site on the left bar of this page, and Joey reads my blog and posts under the alias JD. Again congratulations to both of you! :)

On another note, it turns out me and Joey will be going to England this upcoming August, or July. A family member of hers is being married and we are going for the wedding. So even more reason to lose the weight! Mostly so I do not need to pay for two seats. :P

On another note I finally went back to the gym after much prodding from loved ones. It was awsome! I was on the bus, half asleep thinking to myself what am I doing, I need to sleep not work out, I'm so tired. So I get there, change and jump on the cross trainer. After 40 minutes of sweating my ass off I was rejuvenated, got showered, shaved and felt like a new man!. So to anyone still stuck in a rut, just get out and do it, do it once and you will remember how good it felt. Anyone else come back from a rut and remember how much they missed it?

On another note, for all my friends from Bikejournak and Bikeforums

2006-05-02T14:37:00.000-07:00

Need Motivation? Lets go shopping!

I can hear the cringe of thousands of people who are overweight when I say two little words.

Clothes Shopping.

Since the beginning of time, or after someone ate an apple, we have needed clothes. We usually made them ourselves, with some skin from something and life was good. Than we progressed to making some clothes and buying some, mostly life was still good. Than we progressed to buying all our clothes, which is fine, but one size does not fit all.

And when you wear size 48 pants....few sizes fit you at all.

Clothes shopping when you are skinny or a regular size is fun. When you are huge its hell. I have 4 pairs of pants right now, all of them are ripping. There is not much I can do but wait. I have about 15-20 shirts, most of them are skin tight. I know, I know its my fault, but even when you are trying, until you get to size 34-38 life is hell. I can only imagine it is 10 times worse for my female counterparts.

Another problem I face is the cost of pants for me. As a big guy we use alot more fabric. The jeans you get at wallmart for 28$ cost us 80$ at the big and tall store. I'm not overly rich, a poor student, so you can see where this problem comes in. My mom use to have to spend a ton
of cash when she bought clothes when she was big. Ah the cost of being huge.

I hate clothes shopping though. The only store I feel comfortable in is the big and tall shop, anything else and you get stared at as you are going through. Shopping in a regular store is like window shopping. You see all these clothes you want, but you can't get.

I keep a pair of pants from size 38, 40, 42, 44, 46, and the ones I wear now. Like a timeline to my fatness. Hopefully as I lose weight I will be able to fit back into each pair. Such a bigger motivation that a measurement tape, to know that I truly am getting smaller.

Anyone else keep clothes like this to try and fit in after time, to see if they can?

2006-04-30T10:46:00.000-07:00

Thank You Stranger, You made my week

So a unknown stranger made my week yesterday. This person, who smelt of odd flowers sat beside me on the bus. A group of about 6 people jumped on the bus and this person sat down beside me. Sat down voluntarily beside me instead of standing up. They also did it without a look of disgust on there face.

Anyone who has ever been big and used the bus knows what I am talking about, nobody ever
sits beside you. They must think that obesity is contagious, or perhaps, more understandably,
They will feel crushed by me, or someone else taking up so much space. I wonder if that stranger had any idea they would be the topic of my entry today, and be seen by a thousand or more people.

Day in day out we ride the bus is silent agony, only wishing for human contact, or acceptance and never getting it. We sit and watch as the buss fills up, people sit beside one another till there are only a few spots left. The one beside the wino, the bums, the people who obviously have something wrong with them, and last but not least, the ones who are overweight.

It is a hard blow to ones self esteem when someone would rather stand on the bus than sit beside you. I must admit that I had become so use to it, that it more or less ceased to bug me. I am use to be stared at, that huge guy in the back who looks somewhat clean (again another rare trait among obese people, it seems that most of us left ourselves go.). So when this unknown stranger sat beside me it took me by suprise. Someone actually sat beside me. The little joys some people don't appreciate make the week of others.

So to my unknown angel, thank you for making my week by doing something that is so normal.

2006-04-28T14:31:00.000-07:00

25 Million Pages

Results 1 - 10 of about 253,000,000 for diet
Results 1 - 10 of about 617,000,000 for weight
Results 1 - 10 of about 265,000,000 for fat

How about this one?

Results 1 - 10 of about 29,900,000 for liposuction

Can we say we obsess enough?

253 million websites devoted to diet, another 30million just for liposuction.

How many of us can say we honestly thought about surgery like liposuction? I am talking to the ones who do not need it, but consider it anyway. *sees a lot of hands going up*. So why do we think that? Have we become so lazy in life that we are always looking for the quick fix?

results 1 - 10 of about 23,200,000 for diet pill.

23 million sites can be found on diet pills. This is a case of demand people, these sites would not exist if people were not actively looking for these things. One has to wonder though, why after countless times of people failing, and hearing stories of people failing, do we always go back to the quick fix. That magic pill that will turn us into airbrushed model god. These companies pray on us the most, the ones who fall off, time and time again. They sit there and sing there sweet chorus of "come to us, stop trying so hard, this is so easy."

Case in point, my grandfather, (we call him Bobba) is probably weighing in at 500 pounds. So he decided he wants to live better and goes off to herbal magic. ( A store that sells those magic pills.). What do they want in order to help him loose weight? 14000$ for one year. 14 grand for pills.

How much do I spend on weight loss right now?

40$/month for gym
300$ for a bike in a week.

That is it, yet people are willing to spend thousands and thousands of dollars to try and get a magic fix.

Your best bet? Work at it, get in shape, you will feel better about yourself. Than, when you reach your goal and you are fit, take those thousands of dollars and go on a vacation where you can show off the new you.

Taking pills does not make a lifestyle change, and what we need in order to win this battle is a lifestyle change.

2006-04-27T12:49:00.000-07:00

Work Politics and the damn chairs!

They don't make chairs for fat people thats for sure. I'm stuck in this damn chair my ass checks flopping out on either side I am sure. It a nice chair, a really nice chair, but I wonder if my boss is trying to give the floor a hint. After all, IT places are notorious for having individuals who are overweight. It is almost like my boss was in her secret dark dungeon (All bosses have one). While she was there, she was cooking up some evil scheme, than decided Ahah! I will make the floor loose weight through discomfort.

Thank, she called up Teppermans (a furniture store, teppermans means "we are evil") and had them deliver over 300 chairs that were two sizes two small. So here we are now, the only comfortable people at work are the ones who are skinny. All the fat people are too embarrassed to say "ugh..these chairs are too small for me".

Personally, I think if they just set up a gym in the building it would be more beneficial than a bunch of chairs that are two sizes too small.

2006-04-26T11:12:00.000-07:00

Making time

So as you can see my posts are sporadic. I'm working quite a bit here. I'm putting in
70 hours this week and 70 hours next week, buying my bike on May5th. My diet has been good though so even though I haven't been able to excersize, my diet has been good, so I'm not gaining weight. Life is good.

I got an email form a lady today.

"Tyler, I wanted to tell you that you motivated me and my family to change. We have been working out and dieting for two months now. My husband has lost over a 100 pounds in 4 months, and is in the best shape I have ever seen him.I just wanted to say thank you to you and all the other bloggers who are keeping people motivated such as myself."

People like this inspire me, and keep me going. With working so much I do not have alot to write about, as I'm sure you do not want to sit here and hear about my life in a cube. Hopefully in a week when I have the bike I will have alot more to write about for you all.

On another note my back and shoulders are itchy as hell. I worked on our patio last week, shirtless, in the sun. Needless to say that little white gammer boy got burnt. The patio is looking awsome though, some more wood left to do which I will do soon. Was awsome to actually do something this summer, I was so embarrassed by my weight last summer that I did barely anything. Stayed inside on the computer and at work. Didn't even get a tan or a burn, so was a good feeling to actually get some skin damage. :)

Anyone else get a burn this year yet?

2006-04-21T16:18:00.000-07:00

Work Work and Time

How do you all find time to do the things you do. Ever sit and wish there
were 30 hours in a day? Ah that would be heaven.

Think about it, 30 hours.

8 hours to sleep
1 hour to get ready and go to work
8 hours to work.
1 hour to go to the gym
2 hours at the gym
1 hour to get to class
5 hours for class
4 hours for homework and freetime.

= 30 hours

Nice and free...
right now its more like

7 Hours to sleep
1 hour to get to class
5 hours for class
1 hour to get to the gym
2 hours at the gym
1 hour to get to work
6 hours at work
1 hour to get home

= 24 hours

Notice the less sleep, the less work and the no free time?

Yes, 30 hour days would be perfect, more time would make life so much easier.