A Chat With Matt

The Truth about Love and Elephants

2015-05-26T09:00:00.001+09:00

What The World Needs Now...

2014-12-06T08:30:00.000+09:00

Like it or not we are ALL culpable when humanity is denied and hate prevails anywhere on this planet. Hitting too close to home is God's way of getting us to pay attention. Let's not get distracted by skin color, that's what got us in this mess in the first place. Dividing by devising a value system for human life based on ANYTHING is a violation of spiritual LAW. We will continue to have hurt being the justification of self righteous revenge until we understand the lesson imbedded in our suffering.

Reaction is not power.

Justifying a heinous act does not balance the scales

Not one soul will be left behind. So history WILL repeat itself until our consciousness has been purified and we learn to embrace our differences as if we were embracing God.

Racism shows one of the most primitive, barbaric, stunted forms of human intelligence. This low form of consciousness is the cancer of America. A country founded by people escaping persecution only to repeat the mentally deprived cycle of abuse. What is a pedophile but an abused innocent -- un-healed?

Hate is a damaged psyche.
Revenge does not heal.
Supremacy is impotence personified.
Hate crimes are self hate projected out.

Racism = Mental Illness

Life is school. Lessons will be repeated until learned. Suffering stops when we get the lesson. We are our brothers keeper no matter race, color, religion, sexual orientation, ethnicity or creed.

And that is all Mattilyn Corelia Rochester daughter of Bishop Enoch Benjamin Rochester and Dr. Mattilyn Talford Rochester has to say. Until my next inspired message.

www.mattilynrochester.com

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My birthday wish

2014-07-27T13:19:00.001+09:00

The Bear Whisperer- Bad Mood Bear narrated by Mattilyn Rochester

2014-07-22T04:08:00.001+09:00

INSPIRATION FOR web series Faith & Justice

2014-07-17T05:57:00.001+09:00

I was robbed at gunpoint in Los Angeles, CA in 2007. The experience was surreal. So surreal in fact that one the detectives who interviewed me afterwards said that watching the surveillance was hilarious. "What in the world were you doing?" He asked me, noting that I behaved opposite a victim during a robbery. Every frame of the surveillance camera captured me in a different part of the store, never maintaining the hands up stance typical of a robbery.

It was St. Patricks Day. I woke up and decided to just do it! Today was the day! I was going to shoot my first short film. After a few phone calls, I was on my way to meet my friend and begin my journey as a filmmaker. She had even been kind enough to offer her beautiful home as the back drop. I borrowed a camera from the equipment department at UCLA and had written what I thought was a great script. Everything seemed to be lining up.

I wandered in to a video gaming store a little after noon. I had a little time before meeting the amazing artist Monique DeBose, my counterpoint in my film. An Asian gamer looking skateboard guy who seemed to be friends with the clerk, a chubby Hispanic guy with fluffy, unkempt multi colored hair, were the only two in the store. I was just killing time, I thought maybe I could get an "in da hood" deal on an X-Box for my boyfriend.

3 non assuming African-American guys of various sizes, dressed in black -hoodies and sweatpants entered the store. In a split second one jumped over the counter with a dark garbage bag, another ended up next to me, and the other hovered around the door. I figured the clerk must have known them because his expression didn't seem to change much. Time halted to a stop when the guy at the door yelled, "This is a stick-up!" My brain struggled to make sense of the next 4 minutes, they slugged forward in slow motion. The fluffy haired clerks expression didn't change but his hands went up, almost in front of his face. The 3 assailants pulled black bandana's over their faces. The one next to me at the counter brandished a gun and pointed it directly at the clerks head. I had never seen a gun before. Was the gun real? Was this a joke? Was I in the middle of the filming of some reality show? Was I being 'Punked'? I could hear my heart pounding in my throat. The rush of adrenalin suppressed my sudden urge to slap the gun out of the assailants hand. The blank look on the clerks face had been utter terror. My brain began to slowly compute, "Matty you in danger girl", this is a robbery.

Still in a haze of disbelief, I mechanically turned and marched directly to the door guy. He seemed to be the brains of this mid-day mayhem. "Excuse me" I politely said, inferring that he needed to move from in front of the door.
"What you doin?" He asked me. We were face to face, eye to eye. I remember nothing of his eyes or his face. The detectives were lucky they had footage because I failed selecting any of them in the photo line-up.
"Is this a robbery?" I said, trying to sound nonchalant.
"Yeah it's a robbery shorty."
"Well, you don't need me for that, excuse me, I'mma just go." I tried to pass him, and for a millisecond he smiled. By the time he said, "Get yo ass back over there, this is a robbery yo!" I figured I better not try my luck. I resumed my position at the counter next to the gunman.

My brain immediately switched gears from slow to fast motion. Don't let them take you to the back. I was in my "What Would You Do?" TV mindset. Don't ever go to the back. Put your hands up to show your submission. Cover your eyes to show you won't be able to identify them later. Girl how you gonna cover your eyes and have your hands up at the same time? Why is the back of my neck aching? I rubbed my neck. "Don't nobody move. Yo, didn't I tell you to put yo hands up? This is a stick up!" I was sure I was having a heart attack. I struggled to breathe. My hands went up.

Again, the gears in my brain shifted, this time into several simultaneous parts, some fast and some slow. A calming all is well echoed ever so quietly and ran from the back of my ears down through my chest and over my stomach - my eyes darted back and forth taking in information too fast to even recognize but grabbing little details that for some reason popped out - the guy at the door belted orders.

Without meaning to, I whispered to the gunman, "Please don't shoot him in the head." The thought of the fluffy haired clerks brain splattered all over me urged me to the present moment. "I won't be able to get over that if you shoot him in the head." I pleaded "It'll go everywhere. Please."
"I ain't gonna shoot him." He reassured. The clerk however, wasn't so sure.
I keyed in on something on the tip of the gun, that begged the question, is that gun real? I thought just slap it out of his hands and tell him to stop. My hands slowly moved toward the gun. "Hurry up! Hurry up!" from the door shot my hands back up.
"You promise?" I took a quick glance at the gunman.
"Yeah, I promise. You gotta be quiet shorty."
"Just promise."
"I promise." He paused, as if to question the pact made with me.

My father transitioned about a year and a half ago. From somewhere inside my head I felt like I could hear him speaking. He didn't sound concerned and said, "This might be a good time to practice that seeing the loving essence stuff you are learning in that school you go to." I closed my eyes in obedience. Ron Hulnick, President of the University of Santa Monica where I was earning a Masters in Spiritual Psychology stated in class that we are all divine beings having a human experience. If that statement where true, I thought, then I was a divine being having the human experience of being robbed and scared almost out of my body. And, if I was divine were these 3 in fact divine? Divine beings having the contrast, the human experience of robbing? I noticed details of the hand holding the gun. There was a mark, maybe an old scar from childhood. His hands had a precious softness, an almost tender baby quality. He is divine, I thought to myself, he is a child of God. I prayed for safety of the three of us being robbed and for the 3 robbing. I prayed for the gunman, I prayed that his hands would remain steady and that he would hold to his promise. That no harm would come to anyone on St. Patricks Day in a dinky game store in South Los Angeles, just off the 10 freeway. I felt my father's smile. He knew for some reason unknown to a terrified me that this was an important experience.

The rest of the robbery seemed a blur. I had a few random thoughts like, why are they only taking video games, why not the game machines, why not an X-Box? "Let's go!" the guy at the door ordered. The gunman backed away from the counter. The other jumped back over the counter and headed for the door, his trash bag full with their booty, the spoils of the day. It was almost over. Then, "Get her stuff!" The gunman and the doorman stood eye to eye. Slowly, the gunman put his gun in his pocket, but the doorman was not having it. "Nah man get her shit!" The gunman turned to me and shrugged an I'm sorry. He ever so gently removed the brand new Coach bag my aunt had given me for Christmas, my car keys, and my cell phone. His hands were as soft as I imagined. We both looked down.

"Ya'll wait 30 minutes before you call the police or we will be back." Just like that the ordeal was over.

They didn't take the thing that was most valuable next to our lives, the video camera that was hanging from my arm. I wasn't in much of a mood to "shoot" anything having been so close to a shooting. Almost 7 years to the day I shot Faith & Justice, my freshman film project. The series explores the divinity of 3 seemingly, lost souls and seeks to answer the question, does Faith have faith?

I have learned to honor the creative impulses that come from within me. At the time I didn't realize the correlation between the fateful day in March of 2007 and how it would relate to my determination to birth this seemingly wacky story in March of 2014. Many times we do not know why we are inspired to tell one particular story over the next. Exploring righteousness and forgiveness and right doing vs wrong doing has many facets. It is indeed a labor of love. To support this series please click the link below.

We are fundraising for Faith & Justice
PLEASE SUPPORT TODAY!

2013-04-02T11:32:00.000+09:00

We are worthy....
The resurrection is really about restoring the years the locusts have eaten. Forgiveness is knowing that in any given circumstance knowing that we do not know what our choice would have been. Knowing that grave has not placed us in circumstance to have to choose light over darkness, but knowing that we have faltered before and our lack of consciousness, fear, disconnection from God had caused us to choose darkness. But by the grace of God, there go I. We have chosen darkness before.... Abandoned ourselves in the face if something. Knowing that none of us has the right to condemn another and knowing that the moment we do, we have set into motion an event or series of events that will show us. Show us not to punish us or break us down, no, but to have us experience our faliability, to open us to our humanity, our compassion, our hearts; to open us up to God.

So what can we learn from the resurrection?
I have learned that I am enough. The symbolic meaning of a man dying for me that didn't even know me, brings to mind that I am enough just because I exist. My heart opens with joy knowing that soldiers who have never and will never know me fight for my freedom. People in the civil rights movement sacrificed there lives so I would have the right to have my voice heard, acknowledged and respected on celluloid and social media. That women have been slaughtered to say I have a right to be here, that I a woman am worthy. Christ's example is materialized each and every day in our taken for granted, inalienable rights.

I also have learned that forgiveness is the treatment . Father forgive them for they know not what they do. In our unconsciousness we destroy, betray, lie, hate and steal. And in our unconsciousness we feel righteous in condemning the molester, the Judas's of our time, the sinner .

The resurrection is also about lifting us up to the high road of abundant prosperity, guilt free. Knowing that it not only is our right but our destiny, not only our destiny but our responsibility to shine. To live life and live it abundantly. To shine is to share God's love. To shine is to restore past hurts and offenses. To shine is our job, one of the very reasons that we exist. So what we need to forget is who we are not and what we need to remember is who we are.

My heart is hurting for my brother. My heart aches for the times I have betrayed not only my brother, friends and family, strangers, colleagues, friends, teachers, institutions, but also the millions of times I have berated and betrayed myself, times I have forgotten who I am. By saying too much, overcompensating because i was operating out of the misguided cloud that i was not enough. By not saying anything or not saying enough because i was too scared to disappoint, disrupt or fall out of favor with those with whom i had become emotionally enmeshed with, even though my heart was screaming a truth I was so afraid to utter. The resurrection teaches me that it is a narcissistic disease for me to tarry to long burdened by guilt, shame and remorse. I was blind but now I see, ergo when you know better, you do better. Forgive them for they know not what they do. The most profound and fundamentally transformational form if forgiveness is self forgiveness. The resurrection is about remembering that our unconsciousness is forgiven. No matter what we have done if we are alive we have an opportunity to transform, we have an opportunity to renew, we have an opportunity to shine. So my heart aches for no reason. I am forgiven the offense of my forgotten brilliance, waiting in the balance, for me to just be. Be and know that I am held in the bosom of Abraham. All the needless sins and burdens we carry because we don't give it up, let it go to God in prayer.

Our pain in life is from our unconsciousness and lack of trust. Fear, pain, bad choices, mean spiritedness, bullying, revenge, petty grievances, condemnation, and betrayal comes from a lack of trust. Fear that we are not held, that our needs won't be met. Bitterness not expressed, words spoken and not spoken build into a toxic expression of madness that shows up on the doorsteps, in many of our lives.

So the encouragement is to move about the world with authenticity knowing that no matter what that all is unfolding as it should.

Happy Easter, Happy Passover, happy Resurrection Sunday , happy today is the first day of the rest of your life.

- written by Mattilyn Rochester

COLD CASE - THE LETTER

2013-01-21T06:13:00.001+09:00

2011-11-24T20:59:00.001+09:00

Did this work Mattilyn

228

2011-09-06T14:03:00.000+09:00

Basketball wives redeemed itself today until a human being called another human being worthless. And thought it was okay. Hot mess maybe but worthless? Nothing more needs to be said about that.

A dear friend told me I needed to do some serious housecleaning in the men department if I wanted my king. Operation Clean Sweep is in effect! I realize I have resistance to this concept. But I agree with the concept abut 80 percent.

227

2011-09-04T13:36:00.002+09:00

I cleaned up and am not expecting house guests or visitors!!! Change is in the air henny!!!

226

2011-08-24T13:20:00.001+09:00

lesson for the day
maybe start writing your blog BEFORE the end of the day

225 Random

2011-08-23T14:25:00.000+09:00

Chealsea Handler is hilarious
My mother is the funniest person I know
I cut all my hair off
I think I am finally turning the scale in a positive direction a time when loosing is winning
My house is getting clean and I am getting organized
I feel hopeful about life
I want to paint
I have a dull headache
I want new lamps in my room

224 Today I'm Remembering Daddy

2011-08-22T12:45:00.000+09:00

My dad passed, transitioned, whatever you want to call it, six years ago today. I was having a little resistance celebrating this fact with my family members today. My aunt is the gatekeeper for our family. At 80 when she 'transitions' what will happen? When I told her I didn't think I could make it she replied, "please..." and my heart melted. In the melting process some sadness for my daddy seeped in. I found myself crying sitting in the second pew of the church that he and his brothers and sisters grew up in. I looked around at all the reminders of him, his two grand-nephews were the light torch boys (can't remember the word), nieces singing in the the choir. I motioned to my cousin Rhonda who is a trustee and rock of the church for a tissue. "You got a stuffy nose?" I poked my lip out. Daddy was all around yet missing. My mother stood up to give greetings and seemed particularly playful. Not a usual characteristic of hers. My father was the jester of the two. He took unusual joy in embarrassing his family members at events like this. At one "Rochester Church Day" in his yearly introduction of 10 brothers and sisters and their children and children's children, he mused at a 'new' cousin. "Oh you a new one!" As the church rustled and cousins looked around at the offspring of a brothers discretion that was being introduced to the church at the same time they were being introduced to the family. Or he would have me stand and make some snide comment about how he was taking applications for duly employed sons or nephews of church members on my behalf. My mother stood a little unsteady at first and leaned on the pew in front of her for support. She started with, "I am the former widow of Bishop Enoch B Rochester" 'Former widow?' I watched her and wondered what would emerge from her lips next. She went on talking about how she loved the church that had raised her husband and how kind they were and what she said next had me awestruck. "...And this is my daughter and she needs a husband, so if anyone can help...." The church erupted in laughter as I shook my head. My father somehow managed to take hold of my mothers mouth and give a dig to me to let me know, he is and always will be with me.

223 MY PRAYER

2011-08-20T12:51:00.000+09:00

Now I lay me down to sleep...I pray my over 1,000 'friends' on facebook take a few moments out of there busy lives to vote for an opportunity for me to be on Mad Men. I also pray that they don't just click the link that says "like" because that doesn't mean that they have voted. I pray that they follow the directions and sign in on the link in the upper hand left hand corner and then go back to the link and click VOTE under my angelic photo. Amen

it's easy to VOTE:

1) Click onto the linkhttp://madmencastingcall.amctv.com/browse/detail/3cffa8e3f990c15461f29e61b86163678b873d63

2) Go to LOGIN [in the top right corner of the page]

3) Register to vote by clicking the facebook symbol

4) Then go to to the VOTE Button under my picture.

222

2011-08-19T13:27:00.000+09:00

I cooked some amazing peanut stew and curry chicken today. It felt good to have friends over to commune. I still have lots to do. Mood: pensive

221

2011-08-18T13:46:00.000+09:00

it was a good day and I'm still doing my morning pages. went out, always meet amazing people when I go out.

220 of 365 WRITERS RETREAT

2011-08-17T12:34:00.000+09:00

I had an AMAZING weekend. Haven't had one like this in a LONG time. My time was spent writing for 12 hours (not all writing) with an amazing artist named April Yvette Thompson. She is patient, clear and actually helped me in places that I need help. I learned from mistakes in fear that I made and I, for the first time in a long time, could actually hold the vision that I will publish a book one day soon. I saw a possible path; a way. I have always known my stories are rich and insatiable but beyond my friends and the few people I meet on my path I have never felt diciplined enough or organized enough to bring my stories to a larger audience; the world. She made this possible. We all know that we need to hold a positive intention, focus or attitude. What I also know is that in those intention we must also hold a place for the angels in human form who make it a part of their larger vision to assist others along the way, ya know like pay it forward type stuff. I am grateful that I took the time to nourish myself this weekend. I will be able to nourish others. Got to put my mask on first (if you fly you know what I'm talkin bout)

219 of 365 Seeking Success

2011-08-13T05:16:00.002+09:00

‎"The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek." - Joseph Campbell

This is an interesting statement. I have been told over and over that I am funny. Doing stand up is such a frightening endeavor. What I am learning is that by facing that fear I may indeed be finding that which I ultimately seek. This statement reminded me of this fact and I am grateful.

Tomorrow I begin a silent two day writing endeavor. With so many brilliant ideas surging through me this will give me an opportunity to silence the lambs and focus on birthing one so that I can make room for the many other ideas that are begging for life. I need a mid-wife!!! lol!! I am very excited and cant wait to see what God decides will come forward in the next two days.

218 of 365 Finally

2011-08-12T14:05:00.000+09:00

I finally have an audition that I am excited about. Part of working as an actor is, well, WORKING. Not all of the jobs are fun, they are creative and exciting in the way that you are getting paid to do something you love doing BUT I have been longing for a project that makes me excited. I have not booked the job yet but the prospect of the job is so exciting. It is fun, about relationship, and the dates and times work and are a perfect fit for my life right now. The money could be better but I am excited to sink my teeth into this one. I am also excited that I am taking a 2 day, SILENT writing retreat. AND I am getting tested tomorrow for ADHD. People have joked with me saying I have ADD and I finally decided to check it out. I don't actually think I have ADD but boy I would love to finish my book. FOCUS! Finally some movement!

217 of 365 Are you there Vodka....?

2011-08-11T08:51:00.000+09:00

I am in LOVE with this book. If anyone hasn't noticed I have been in a bit of a huff. In my intention to live a joy filled life I decided that AFTER my pity party (gotta have a pity party) I would read last night. I bout the book at the airport over a month ago and started reading in earnest last night. I decided that I had enough of the self help books that I love so much but never seem to finish and opted for some idiot relief. And what a genius of an idiot she is. I literally laughed out loud on the train today while reading it. She is brilliantly funny and laughter is so healing. It moves your energy straight up!!!!
In ancient greece they considered humor to be a "gift from God" and what a joyous gift it is. Made my day for sure.

The audition went great. I was asked to read for another part, which made me very happy. The casting director said my read was "perfection" which means absolutely nothing in the casting world but it was better to hear that than "what the heck were you thinking" So it was a good day. And I laughed. A LOT. THANKS CHELSEA

216 of 365

2011-08-10T11:51:00.000+09:00

Soooooooo. I have an audition tomorrow and for the first time in a while I am NOT that excited about it. I have not booked anything in a couple of months and I just am not amped about it. I wouldn't mind booking it but I don't have the energy to invest and then get the ole let down. I will go, do my best and forget about it. I just don't have the energy to care. And I hate jobs that have me as some old ass servant to someone else. It is a brilliant piece of literature and an opportunity to do what I love so, I'll show up. High involvement with low attachment to the outcome. That's what they say, well I have low involvement and low attachment to the outcome.

btw, I am watching Celebrity rehab and it is stressing me out. Michael Lohan is stressing me, I am about to have a heart condition. This is too much. WAtching out of control people is stressful.

215 of 365

2011-08-09T12:30:00.000+09:00

Okay, so I am learning some things about myself. And rant begins NOW
I CAN'T STAND people who DON'T LISTEN and try to pull attention in class. It urks my nerves. They say when you are "upset because...." it is an uncovered personal issue. When I follow this thought and ask why this bothers me...wait also, while I'm at it, I can't stand when people make spiritual statements that are condesending and full of judgement and opinion and guised in esoteric spiritual prose.....okay back to why. Why do these things bother me? Because they feel manipulative. I got issues with people manipulating (has happened) or trying to manipulate me or others. It actually enrages me. I should be more specific but I am a punk...read the book....
I am taking a writers retreat sat-sun and hopefully the book will be coming along.

I will pick up the stand up tape but I think I look God awfully fat so I am not sure I will post it.

I have not been serious about my quest for true-love and marraige. I have had too many detours and the birthdays keep coming.

I am not happy with my career and think I need to do something BIG but don't know exactly what. I know I need to shake it up a bit. I don't promote myself, follow up with cards and letters and I don't go to events and networking opportunites. I was inspired when I watched the Katie Perry true Hollywood story. That girl has drive and passion. I have been at this acting game and love game all my life. I have failed for over the past 20 years at both. That is more than half my life. Boy am I determined.

I have been proposed to in the most insulting and unromantic way.....and I considered it.....sheesh...where is the love?

I am sick of people that I wouldn't EVER consider getting the courage to confess there love. Where is the REAL love. I am so sick of excuses and drama I find it hard to go out at all. I am over bars, clubs, parties and social events. They BORE me. People BORE me.

I don't miss Japan anymore. I am thinking about moving to Australia and seeing what the acting scene is like there. I like myself when I travel. I want to merge the traveling me with the now living in the United States me.

I think that's my truth for the day. Thanks for listening.

214

2011-08-06T14:26:00.002+09:00

So last night I went out to Serefina with two friends and we met FBI agents! The best part? They were human. I imagined guys like this to be cold and narrow minded in scope, almost roboty, but they were wise, grounded and had such a human feel and there conversation was filled with insight and heart. It did my soul good, I felt protected in the world.

213

2011-08-04T13:58:00.000+09:00

zumba, lost 1.4 pounds, made two important phone calls.

212

2011-08-03T11:16:00.000+09:00

My first day of rest all month and I feel guilty!!!!! Yikes!!! I rip and run and rip and run and I did nothing today and felt pretty bad about it. Well I did go to a zumba class, grocery store, juiced and fixed dinner and made a few phone calls and paid a few bills. But it felt like nothing because there is so much MORE to do. Books to read, ideas to jot down, projects to finish, people to thank and make contact with, an office to organize, people to call back, appointments to make, so much to do. So much to do.