A DROP OF MY SEA

Through Skill, Not Skin

2022-05-31T05:55:00.011-07:00

You are unlucky that I am in a good place,

Because I am at peace,

I can afford to be quiet,

And yet,

You still expect,

Me to speak,

When I can walk,

Walk the path of life,

Hand in hand with myself.

I can take care of the tires of my car,

I can go to the hospitals for my scars,

Yes, I can drive,

My father taught me well.

What he did not teach me,

Is to become prey

to your predatory gut.

So, in that sense,

You are unlucky,

Because the lamb you thought I was,

I am not.

I am a lioness who is hungry,

Hungry to make it on her own,

Hungry to survive,

To feed her predatory soul.

I want to reignite the fire in me,

To only light up the world,

Through skill, not skin,

And me as a whole.

A flower in my barren garden

2019-12-05T09:47:00.001-08:00

A long time ago

I owned a luscious garden

From where I could go

To the house of stones which never got hardened

I could walk on them like dust on cotton

I could bathe in the river

Sing in the medow

Dance in the forest

Watch the sky glow

A long long time ago...

My garden was a retreat

A retreat for my brain

With Jasmines smelling

Roses blooming

Bogainvillea,

pink, white and yellow

Lilies singing to my nose

a song of repose

And tonight I sing to thee

the song that flutters in my belly

a fire that ignited me in Delhi

and burnt my garden

I sit alone in my deserted garden

dunking my head in my legs

think of you and your sweet smelling air

much sweeter than my Jasmines

My flowers never came back to life

because they knew

to compete with thee

they'll have to blow up the air

with a smell that now intoxicates me

the weeds in garden

are taking over

and intoxicating me more

They know,

I know,

the weeds know,

that I need you more,

Much more than before...

I still own the garden

but it's barren now

it doesn't smell like before

just some reminisce of your perfume

soft touch and breath

englufs me when I take my Juhu walks

on the concrete that's hardened now

the rivers are thirsty for your reflection

the foresets want you to dance with me

the lilies want us to sing together

They know,

I know,

the Bougainvilleas know,

that you are the flower in my barren garden...

The colour of my dupatta

2018-02-10T06:02:00.004-08:00

Image: Ujala Chowdhry

In my dupatta,

lies a life's full cycle.

In my dupatta,

lies life's invisible structures.

The colour of my dupatta,

is important to you.

You want it to be white

when I lose my precious child.

Black or grey,

for when I give my sister away.

If I wear the wrong dupatta

you will strip me off my integrity

you will make me change the damned dupatta

Till the colour is right

Till all my blood flows out from my veins

and onto my dupatta it rains,

the colour red.

In which you'll gladly let me be with a man in bed.

And choke me with it

When he is dead.

My dupatta colours people's imagination

If I'm naked underneath

People imagine invagination

If I'm naked underneath

The colour of my dupatta becomes redundant

The colour of my skin then raises the heat

And I've again been stripped of my integrity.

You see me as a whore,

fuck me to my skin's core,

and tear the dupatta that held my dignity.

In my dupatta lies a woman

A woman who is often seen as a demon

The dupatta wards off the evil

but can't ward off the inner devil.

I, eventually, learn to throw it away

And bare the truth that the dupatta was supposed to hide

I also learn to hang it on the side

And bare the breasts anyway

A white transparent dupatta

Now often covers the lust for thrust.

Forever in space

2018-02-08T04:49:00.004-08:00

Image: Adrian Pelletier/ Unsplash

If trees had eyes

Where would you hide?

If the wind could speak

How would you lie?

The witnesses of a wedding

The witnesses of a marital rape

The witnesses of a funeral

The witnesses of an ending

They stand tall

And blindly witness it all

A decade may pass

or a century

The tress live with it all

The winds carry it all

Forever in space...

She couldn't go out...

2017-04-28T06:22:00.002-07:00

Image: Birmingham Museums Trust/ Unsplash

The confinement of your embrace

reminds me of her confinement,

in her “home.”

Not because of lethargy

but because of shame.

The shame confined her

to her restricted refuge.

She became a slave,

after becoming a refugee.

The slave to her short-sighted desire

and to the society’s cruel manner.

She could go out,

but the shame…

The shame arising from the mundane

She was a beautiful and a delicate dame

but her face told a story, which wasn't the same.

She didn't look like a human!

She didn't look like other animals!

Her face shouted the wrath it sustained.

From being proud, carefree, and happy,

she became just a dame full of shame.

She couldn’t go out of her “kin,"

to even buy a pack of sanitary napkins.

She couldn’t buy her child a dress

and the child couldn’t kiss and cress

the shamed mother.

The shame belongs to the society

yet it seems very personal.

She perceived a high social shame
and couldn’t go out of her painful mundane.

Thou shall remain, legitimate or not

2017-04-21T06:53:00.002-07:00

Petroglyph left by early Native Americans. Rock Art - Wild Horse Canyon [San Raphael Swell, Utah] - Vinceable91

Hearts from four contrasting corners

connected at the centre.

We grew to love the city

and its delicacies,

but not its people.

We learnt our way around

but always found our soul attached to the ground.

We plucked it together

and reached a new high of life.

And there we were,

driving on the well-lit city roads,

flying inside our hot-box,

calm and quiet.

Then, we flew into a dream

painted by Pink Floyd,

delivered by the boom-box,

turning that tiny reunion into a

“concert on wheels.”

There is something about legitimacy,

that creates intimacy.

And there is something about piracy,

that creates animosity.

Legitimacy is fair,

for an artist, like a mother’s care.

On the other hand,

it’s a scare

for a kind human pair.

Us monkeys,

don’t need a bill to tie us down.

We already are tied to each other

in sickness and in health.

We don’t just need a group,

we need our personalised herd.

like our cousin chimpanzee,

cousin gorilla

and cousin bonobo.

A watermelon could win

a bonobo-man some kin.

For a man-band,

victory is rewarded with

money and album-kin.

A piece of mind and a dream

is what the kin people win.

How does one put a price on that!

Well, we do, we all do.

While, we sailed away into actual dreams,

we woke-up as humans still “young, wild and free.”

There isn’t a measure

that could measure our legitimacy.

There isn’t a stamp

that could stamp a name on our relationships.

Everything can’t be seen with eyes.

In fact, one of the best things is seen in unconsciousness,

that has the sight of an artist.

We are all artists,

we unconsciously create in our sleep,

a painting, a sketch, a movie, a song, an infinity,

from the daily scenes, we perceive.

We do sell our dream,

to thou who shan’t be named.

In return, we gain faith mutually

and share pain exclusively

in our self-crafted herd.

A lie's truth

2017-01-01T11:09:00.007-08:00

Our saviour subject to his parents at Nazareth by John Rogers Herbert - Victorian Web

Why do I have to lie?

Why not?

Will they believe your truth?

They won't, they can't

But I wish they could

What a waste of wish,

on a thought that is childish?

They played an immense role,

at-least till you were eighteen.

But in your life, like in the movies,

their short appearance is over,

and now, you lead it till the 'the end.'

But they are my DNAs,

Well, so is our African mother.

and have been with me

in all the chilly Januarys

and the sunny Mays.

Hey, now you are mixing the two!

The facts of life and the vulnerable you.

How can I let them go?

Who said you have to?

You did!

Really, did I?

My apologies, then.

And we should start again.

When you were a child

You were innocent and wild

So much to learn, so much to find

The truth of your life which is unique like your DNA

You are theirs, the mixture of two,

and so many others that you will never know

They fed you bread, butter and some unsaid rules

And they sent you to a Christian school

But were they successful in making you a Christian?

No, certainly not

In fact, my Christian schooling,

I completely forgot

Well, there you go

You have learnt to criticise your makers

So lets light it up
And cloud the line between the truth and the lie...

The marijuana man

2016-09-21T13:36:00.004-07:00

Image: Ujala Chowdhry

He walks the earth

with his gentle footsteps

Looks at the ground

and stays grounded

But when he looks high-

his head doesn’t touch the sky,

his heart does…

He talks in a tone

ever so surreal

With a baritone

that quivers the Adam

And tingles the breasts

of she who listens

And slowly surrenders to his will…

His soft, luscious, pink lips

when kissing the first joint of the night

You’d be spellbound by the scene

with thoughts going ridiculously obscene

You bite your own lips

and wait for him to blow into your mouth

With his music taking over

you’ve been taken over…

Stars seem near

Trees look like figures

Roses smell incredible new

The breeze tickles your body

and reaches places you'd want him to

The smoke smells like earth-

like you are lying on a bed of grass

and the sky adjusts your light settings,

without having to ask…

His eyes are bloodshot and drooping

He lets a smile brightened his face

Looks at you with the eyes of Jesus

and hair like lion cub’s

He isn’t afraid to show his soul

he’s right there, with you

with his rolled-up sleeves

and cargo pants…

Oh, and by the way

If you stumble upon him,

he goes by the name of the marijuana man,

do catch him, if you can…

Whose heart is it anyway?

2016-06-27T04:35:00.004-07:00

She, our daughter,

Image: Ujala Chowdhry

is a medical disaster

I did cut her body in two

one for me

and, one for you

Her breasts for her lover

Then what is the hold-up, dear?

Her heart has a mind of its own

It slips out

every-time I touch it

How do I divide her heart?

I am baffled and confused

How shall we restart her,

without the damned heart?

Maybe, her lover can,

change the heart of her heart

I tried a lot, sir

But I can’t change her,

Her heart

Oh, what good are you?

Here, take your share;

her breasts are yours now

But what about her heart, sir?

We can’t do anything about it

It is arrogant and stubborn

Just as she..

I agree, sir.

I agree, dear.

Well, who needs her heart anyway

Now that we have our individual pieces

We can all stop obsessing over her

I proved her wrong

She, after all, does belong

to me, her mother and her lover

But what about the heart, sir?

Well, fuck the heart

Let’s be happy with what we’ve got,
Give me some formaldehyde
And we are good to go...

Children of boredom

2016-06-18T02:04:00.001-07:00

Image: "Allegory of Venus and Cupid"/ Agnolo Bronzino

Jack, I'm bored,

of us,

of routine,

of no more lust.

What shall we do?

Because Jack, I'm bored

You sexed me up

to brim.

I've known you now,

ever since.

Same old penis,

same old positions

and the same old us.

I want a child,

although we decided otherwise.

But a little one

would fill a little void,

that was created

when you filled me up,

every day of our boring lives.

Fill me up again

this time for the real purpose

to break the non-mundane

And join the circus

Thirteen years later...

Have mercy, Vivienne!

I'm much out of cum.

I gave you ten,

yet you seek more.

So go ahead,

and ask your eldest son

for his virgin cum.

Because, bitch, I am done!

Let's talk, man to man

2016-06-11T07:37:00.009-07:00

Image: Ujala Chowdhry

I am unruly, I am un-inhibited, I am naked

I am the pre-historic man

No one has seen my face

You may only know me from my bones

But I existed, very much so

Like you and your hoe

I know you are dying to meet me

Dying to ask questions

And strip me more than I already am

I am glad and too proud

To still be an undocumented man

You don't know my struggles

You think there was peace

Little do you know about my daily routine

If you did, you wouldn't dare to travel back

Just stay where you are

In your own time

Live your fucking life…

Evolution made you heroes

And greediest of them all

Your city lights are blinding me

Your sky invasions are worrying me

Your industries are choking me

But I guess it is necessary

I came here to tell you my story

I am no divine soul

I am just as evil as you

We, as a species, are inherently invasive

I invaded the uncovered vaginas

And the desserts, mountains, and savannahs

The only erections then

Were seen on a male’s groin

Or a female’s bosoms

You think there was equality

But there was hardly a society

There weren’t any terms

But if there were

Then I too raped

And did all the things you consider a taboo

You have a society

And a grand order

Someone to complain to

Concrete private walls to confide into

Animals dying to become your meals

But your females are too coward

They don't fight back

Young ones are weak

They aren't as feisty as our own

I come from a pre-historic time

Where actions rarely had repercussions

But that was my time

This is yours

Don’t invade mine

Else I will fuck yours…

Lecherous longing, priced phallus

2016-05-25T09:56:00.002-07:00

Mother!

Yes, Venus

Daddy has no penis

Ah! Don’t be rude, dear

And don’t forget to take it in your rear

But what mother?

Rip his humerus

And humour your vagina

Break his femur into two

for it may be too thick for your ischium

What about his tool, ma?

I took possession of it,

some years back

In 1769,

I was seventeen and sublime

In my country, he came as a missionary

And taught me a good lesson on loss and gain

I lost my virginity in missionary

and gained phallus

But when I got on top

Things got hot

He gained my perky buttocks

And his penis was lost

What’s for dinner, mother

Something that you will like, daughter

Roasted boneless human flesh

Some spiders which I didn’t fry

And tomatoes, that I did sun dry

What about the banana, radish and carrot?

I fed those to our dinner sponsor

He wasn’t dead, just in shock

I took care of that after feeding him

Food tastes even better, mother

With pleasant conversations and the significant other…

The immortal power of phallus possession

2016-03-28T14:59:00.002-07:00

Watcha' readin’ pumpkin pie?

Sigmund Freud’s penis envy

What on earth be that?

Ah! the possession of phallus

I don’t get what you say, dear Venus

Don’t worry mama, neither do I…

Oh! Mother, Freud is playing with my mind

Arousing an interest, a desire

For sexuality, sex

I’ve been having dreams,

Ever so lusty, ever so wet

That it's me lying on the bed

Instead of you, next to your man

Run to the forest, dear

Get bananas for your libido

A radish, for a banana, may be too thick

A carrot, for color

Catch some salmon for the bear

Feed it first, then bring it home for dinner

Here, take my knife

And get some spiders to fry

And some tomatoes to sundry

You're back early, girl

Jesus Christ! What be that?

Oh! Mother,

I had my first complete sexual experience

I jumped in the river

Caught the salmon

Took my clothes off, while expecting the bear

A young man offered his penis in the phallus

I took it and chopped it right off

Then I killed him for our dinner

I don’t need a banana, radish, or carrot

I possess a phallus now

I don’t get no penis envy anymore

Ha! My Venus has a penis of her own

Well, did you at least get the spiders?

Oh! that I did..

Dear, daddy’s home and has a phallus

Go to his room and do it properly

Without chopping his tool off

While I marinate this young man

And prepare a hearty dinner

Anti and matter battle in me

2015-05-23T06:53:00.001-07:00

I live with my antimatter

I live with it every day

I collide, I rupture, I detonate

I never cease to cease a catastrophe

The matter and,

the antimatter

Are eating my white and,

grey matter

I’m yet to find-

Which one is “friend"

and, which one is “foe" matter

I suffer minor explosions every day

I heal myself in every way

They say it’s not good to be anti-christ-

a devil may enter through an unholy hole

But fucking satan refuses to buy my soul

He just sits in me

Busy buying other mortal souls

I can’t make a bargain

I am too afraid of the darkness

It(s)aint-

going to touch my matter

It(s)aint-

going to blow my matter

It(s)aint-

neither a friend,

nor a foe

I still wake up with both colliding

The moment my brain comes to know

That it’s awake

And still combatting

a battle of reasons, anti or not

Leaving me freakishly exhausted

How am I, then, expected,

to face the social nonsense?

With the two explosive poles

Knitted in one, half mine, soul

The day I erupt

I’ll cry tears of lava

Scream the whirlpools

Smell vengeance

And hear no more

I don’t cease catastrophe

I, definitely, won’t cease the forthcoming

The bottle is bottled up,

to brim

I will let it flow

Not because it needs to,

Because it will

As is the law of physics

Anti and matter

Don’t exist together

If they do

You’ll never see the light of the day

or the dark of the night

You would only see

the unseen,

the unheard,

And I want to see that,

happening, in me..

The Heavenly Touch

2015-02-27T21:30:00.002-08:00

White, as a floating cloud

Soft, as a bloated feather

Standing out in a fleeting crowd

Are the breasts of a woman of heather

Dressed by nipples like olives

Covered by nature's caramel coloured guards

You'd want to die in them

The moment you press your lips on the rim

It would be hard to resist

The urge to suck the nectar from their fruit

But as you draw your self closer

Everything else would seem like a blur

Nothing has been designed to contain them

But the clasp of your palm

They define truly, cream-de- la-cream

And don't deserve to remain hidden

As you lay your head in the valley of hills

Heaven seems like a possible refuge

As she throws her bra in a thrill

You'd be amazed to see her breasts so nude

When she walks

They bounce on her every move

You'd wish to see them through her shirt

And find it hard to clear your mind's dirt

She knows they are watching

She knows them are young and perky

She wouldn't be surprised if she caught you masturbating,

Thinking of her, unclothed and lurky

The biggest sins of all

Is when you get to cress them in your bare hands

For her, you shall fall immediately

Like a meteor from starry bands

Nothing after the touch

Feels soft and real

You'd lock yourself with her reminiscence in a hutch

And close your eyes to see her naked and surreal

Ah! The heavenly touch

Ah! The heavenly touch..

Them carved on a feminine figure

You cant get just enough

Them crafted perfectly to give you a trigger

Ah! the heavenly touch

Ah! The heavenly touch..

Makes your senses moan like its your first

How can you ever get enough?

From the breasts that were designed for your lust

O,' my vessel, grieve no more

2015-01-03T22:23:00.005-08:00

Image: Ujala Chowdhry

This vessel, I must respect

Which embodied my pale soul

I see your face in the mirror every day

And see the respect has been earned, in thy eyes

But I still see you shying away from your sight

I wonder-

What is left of you to do?

O,' my vessel, grieve no more

You remember you were the white swan

You confessed your purity to your soul

You were winging in the sky of bright and hope

Why can't you still look at your face?

Which showed you not to grieve anymore

What is left of you to do?

O,' my vessel, grieve no more

Get in touch with the reality

Its gonna go for long, longer than now

You have been gifted the gift of time, you may have earned it

This gift is hard to find, in the race of time

You be what you want to be, forget about the pace

You build pace, you build strength

You see thy face

In the oval mirror, hung on the flawless white walls of pure

And, then, ponder-

What is left of you to do?

O,' my vessel, grieve no more

Run Free

2014-08-12T22:02:00.000-07:00

Heat of the sun

When kisses my cheeks

The blush on them

Brightens my day, like the red streaks

Warmth in the breeze

When brushes across my face

The wind in my sleeve

Slowly takes me in its encase

I raise my head above the ground

Stretch my eyes till infinity

I hear a beautiful sound

Of birds chirping songs of melody

I stand up with my arms open wide

I throw my body in the lap of a gushing sea

Surrendering the pain I have felt all this while

Dreaming of a dawn, when I will run free

I will run free, I will run free

Because that's the only way I will be, me

I will run free, I will run free

One day, from the shackles of society

Mumma in my drama

2013-05-08T11:32:00.001-07:00

Image: Jon Flobrant/ Unsplash

Had a rough day

Took the wrong way

Been thrashed by my boss

I made a huge loss

Empty belly fights hunger's attack

Eating all the traffic while going back

I come home with a headache

It's quarter past eight

Throwing my office at the door

Her face makes me say this more and more

Mumma...

My dear dear mumma

Thanks for always being a part of my drama

Your food has an aroma

That hushes my turbulent traumas

Your hands on my head when sway

Gives me strength to fight my days

Your beautiful face

Makes this world a better place

Mumma...

Thanks for being part of my drama

Had a bad break up

I feel so stuck up

I never listen when u say

"Honey dont just blindly cave"

I am driving back my mom's way

To hear her say,"its gonna be okay"

I come home with a headache

Its quarter past eight

Throwing my bad relation at the door

Her face makes me say this more and more

Mumma...

My dear dear mumma

Thanks for being a part of my drama

Your food has an aroma

That hushes my turbulent traumas

Your hands on my head when sway

Gives me the strength to fight my days

Your beautiful face

Makes this world a better place

Mumma..

Thanks for being a part of my drama..

Hallelujah

2013-04-19T11:26:00.003-07:00

Image: Europeana/ Unsplash

I am lying blank in my empty cold room

Thinking of the times that we've been through

Falling in love when we were kids

Held each other together with a kiss

But where did it all fade in the mist

His absence is singing in chorus to me, hallelujah

Hallelujah. . Hallelujah

He was always there when I was alone

Wiping my tears he became my backbone

When I was scattered all over the place

He would enclose me in his warm embrace

Making my worries all go away

He sang gently into my ears, hallelujah

Hallelujah. . Hallelujah

He'd come to pick me up

He liked me natural without makeup

I'd wear his favorite summer colors

He'd be there on my every summons

Nothing was right and nothing was wrong

When we played our favorite song, hallelujah

Hallelujah. . Hallelujah

We would lie next to each other

Smoking cigarettes under a gleaming cover

Watching nothing but each other's soul

Rejoicing the time after years we stole

He'd wrap me up in a blanket with a hole

Closing my eyes when it rained hallelujah

Hallelujah. . Hallelujah

Then a roaring storm came

And we both fell

Under the black clouds of an ancient spell

After braving so many we lost this one

But one thing was there and it hangs still

A cold and a broken hallelujah

Hallelujah. . Hallelujah

Girl to Boy

2013-04-06T12:12:00.000-07:00

When did life take such a big turn that I cant even reach you now. How did we drift so far apart that I cant even feel your presence around me. My love for you was preserved in the bud of togetherness, when did it wilt under the scorching sun of hatred. I dont see you in my dreams anymore. You have become a distant memory. I know you are there but the moment I try to connect with you how do I end up being more disconnected from you. I dont need dreams to talk to you because I have forgotten how you were with me. I have forgotten how it was like to be in love. If you were with me sitting besides me encasing me in your arms I would tell you so much I kept from you. This will never happen so I will just close my eyes and try to replicate the feelings I feel around you.

Girl:

I have forgotten how to smile

Without you in my life

I am declining the joy

Because I don't feel alive

Boy:

These walls of dejection

Are surrounding you

Under your flawed perception

I cant reach you

Girl:

These walls rose

When I lost myself in that catastrophe

For u, I have closed all doors

Because you are the turbulence in my mental peace

Boy:

You blame me for that fiasco

For that entire episode was I the maestro?

And you?

Didn't you agree into?

Girl:

My conviction was in your sanity

Your judgment was more savvy

Boy:

To err is human

So, I'm filing my petition

"Dear, open you mind for once

And let me enunciate the truth

I never meant for you to loose your repose

Your life is more precious to me than you suppose

I have tried to save you, my love

From the moment I held your hand to propose"

Girl:

Your entirety is fogged

Your judgment is clogged

In this rampant chaos

You have torn me apart

Boy:

Now, I wont beg for you to unite the bracket of our being

No matter how much this pain is grieving

Girl:

Your words are appalling

Your conduct is agonizing

Why everything and everyone are you reasoning?

Why the dynamics of my existence are you demeaning?

Boy:

You and me are like sun and moon

We each have our solitary mystical fumes

Hard to coexist

Impossible to drift

Girl:

Do you ever hear your self?

With me do you ever try to establish coherence?

Boy:

With you I've more than enough patience

But baby, you are just used to infinite sweetness

Girl:

You have stopped listening

And started imagining

Things I don't mean, things I don't say

I just wanted you to lend me an ear

And make the worries go away

No matter how colossal they may appear

Boy:

I am all ears

You just dont let yourself out

Girl:

You being absent when present

Has put me behind the bars of doubt

I am just searching for that old you

Who used to make a sad little girl anew

Boy:

When times change

People refrain

Even I am chasing the part of you

With whom as an adult I grew

Girl:

I never thought one day I'd have to discover

That we have lost a part of each other

I recon this loss is greater than the gain

And we wont embark our journeys together again

When sun and I play

2013-03-04T08:16:00.000-08:00

A funfilled day

When sun and I play

On a bright Sunday

The month of may

For every occasion

A face to play

Stating the story

Of what I have to say

Face speaks through eyes

They sparkle every time

You see me laugh and cry

Expressions are my mime

Because when sunlight ascends

The magic begins

What was benighted

Becomes enlightened

A funfilled day

When sun and I play

On a bright Sunday

The month of may

My Cousin

2013-02-02T09:41:00.009-08:00

We all talk about our brothers and sisters but seldom find single children talking about their siblings. This poem is for all those single children whose lives were enriched by the presence of their cousins. And for me, my beautiful cousin...

She loves cats

I love dogs

yet when she comes to my house

we spend most hours

talking about her cats chasing a mouse

I look into her eyes

And see the twinkle of joy

I turn to my mirror

I have the same twinkle

On seeing my cousin's sister rarely, so rarely

Like a bunch of chipmunks

Giving birthday bumps

We would play for days and days

Growing up would get us daily amazed

In the same house being together raised

I look into her eyes

And see the twinkle of joy

Then I turn to my mirror

I have the same twinkle

On seeing my cousin's sister rarely, so rarely

Looking similar

Dressing in one color

We stepped into the same shoes

I hold her hand

When she's scared

I give a push forward

And fight with her in her battles

With emotions in full throttle

I look into her eyes

And see the twinkle of joy

Then I turn to my mirror

I have the same twinkle

On seeing my cousin's sister rarely, so rarely

I cherish her presence

in my life

She may be absent a lot of times

But it always and always

brings in joy

whenever she leaves her essence

With so much grace and poise

WITHOUT YOU

2013-01-27T13:28:00.000-08:00

Monday morning I opened my eyes

Saw shimmering drops falling from the sky

Through my window

I saw the shadow

Of the green trees, all dropping so low

Drenched from tiny twig to mighty root below

Lilies laid their grave on ground

Spreading the gloomy fragrance all around

Birds laid their weight on the branch of pine

Lamenting the demise of that golden sunshine

The aura filled with sad eyes

Saw the mighty sky that cries

Maybe over the separation

From its dearest sun of summer season

Its so hideous

Its so outrageous

This desertion from you

Which leaves me grief to pursue

Without you rain makes every thing moist like tears

Without you my soul is impinged with fears

Encased in your arms

Rain showers its melodious charms

Roses glaze with dew

Green grass rises anew

Oak smells so beautiful

Orchids looking so purple

Cold drops bring a shiver in me

I rush to hug you gently

Your presence makes the difference

Your absence leaves an essence

Of love, of passion, of pain

Like a rainbow glittering after the melancholic rain

A December night

2013-01-23T11:54:00.001-08:00

When last pale yellow leaf of December fell

the winds cast a spell,
that blinded the capital city,
and an inception of a tragedy

was soon to blemish the city's history.

The empty and unarmed roads of Delhi

staged a recital by five unleashed-cannibals,
and a juvinile,

who tore open the flesh of a live human,

and lodged her like a ball from a cannon-

signing her body with an ink of brutality.

Scandalised and terrified,

She fought for her grace.

Nirbhaya - the girl without a name and a face,

brought the blinded city to the center stage

and taught the nation to fight fears-
be it a woman with daughters

or a daughter about to be a woman.

Everywhere there is a roar

Of many faceless Nirbhayas

Who fight with these animals in men

In every nook and cranny of our homeland

Nation is stripped from all corners

We are scared for our daughters

Nevertheless, we shall fight

We shall march towards a new foundation

To,
Heal the wounds

Amend the wrong

Perfume the pungent

Flower the barren

See the unseen

Feel the unfelt

Stand up and bring a change

Transform tears into anger

Channel the anger

And begin from where she left.

Nirbhaya- the faceless

Is the face of a terrorising India

An India, you'd wish, you'd never seen
On that sad night of December sixteen...

BOY TO GIRL

2012-05-15T10:03:00.001-07:00

It's been days and days...And each day felt like a decade.

Each time she strikes a date on the calendar, it literally bleeds my heart out. I'm wounded inside out, yet I'm on this drive to tear us both apart. I just wish to silently take away all of her pain and put her to a sound sleep. I'm ready to be the devil as long as my angel is smiling. She refuses to smile, she declines all joy, and she repudiates elation. All she is ingesting is a routine of sadness, a day full of grief, and a night of appalling illusion.

I loathe myself for being this to her. She is oblivious. But I know the truth. Just like day and night follow each other but can never coexist. I guess I'm always going to be on the lookout for her. But never show up in person. Call me a coward or call me insane, but all I ever wanted is her to be happy. I can't sleep without hearing her voice. I can't call her, I don't want to shatter her with my brutal conduct. I'll just have to hold it in till I crash to sleep.

I'm going to speak with her but in my mind. Actually, I can see her sitting beside me wearing her beautiful white dress. Calm and smiling. This is how I like her. She looks splendid. When she laughs and plays, I just don't want her to stop. I gently wait till she is happy setting my hair with her soft warm hands. I like to rendezvous with her calm self when I'm high... This has kept me going so far...

BOY

You look like a vision

In my frantic illusion

How can I forego this beautiful possession

For whom I have this ultimate obsession

GIRL

In my shallow beauty, you are drenched

How can you see me smile?

When my lips are barely clenched

To stop those tears buried in exile

BOY

I see your face

And a grin arches on mine

Your beauty is eternal

Thy bliss is imperial

BOY

Have you lost all your conviction in me?

Worst than an evil

Me, is what you perceive?

GIRL

I've stopped thinking

I've stopped speculating

You are a myth to me

Your love is out of my reach

BOY

My entire love only functions for you

You don't see what I see is true

I'm the dusk and you're my dawn

I'll always be there when you close your eyes

And wrap you in the blanket of night

GIRL

You say you are darkness and I'm your light

Why don't you end this fight

And paint us grey

BOY

You don't see the bigger picture

Your thought process is hypothetical

You are the flower I nourish

I don't want thorns around you to flourish

GIRL

Do you hear yourself?

You are fabricating those thorns

What bigger picture do you speak of?

I fail to relate to your theory, all morphed

BOY

You think I'm having a bash

Seeing you pale and exhausted

My soul is burning my senses into ashes

I have no words to describe how I feel

When my only charm of life has no zeal

GIRL

Stop the madness

Stop this curse

Come back to me, my love...

BOY

Oh! How your words fired a bullet into my chest

Instead of pain, I feel comfort

You know, when juice is squeezed out of an orange

You further squeeze bitterness into the bowl

You are that unaware bowl

I don't want bitterness to enter your soul

GIRL

What did you leave me to argue about?

Your whole orientation is crafted around this doubt

You say I lost my conviction

But didn't you?

We are the sailors of the same ship

Trying to ride along with different trips

Why do you expect us to converge?

When life itself is a mixture of roads that always diverge

BOY

You are used to infinite sweetness

You won't like this devil in me

GIRL

I'm used to you

Without you, there's already a devil residing on me

BOY

You are worthy of a golden throne

Why thou you settle for a chair made of rock and stone?

GIRL

Royalty would choke me

And devour me from inside

I'm not a princess

Just a girl who wants to feel precious

In your eyes

In your life

BOY

What more wits do I present before you

Because what you said has credibility of wisest of wise

I just want to go into a slumber

And never want to face this reality

I now want to wake up to a new morning in a meadow

Where you play your flute with melody and mellow

Where you chuckle and giggle

Smile and laugh

And are free from all dissolute thoughts

When shall I find you in a white dress dancing in that meadow?

GIRL

We may be dusk and dawn

We may not be together drawn

We may be wind and breeze

And never walk together along

But just like the flight in a bird

and light in the sun

You are forever in my heart woven

Because you have always been my savior

We'll soon find a meadow for both of us

But for now, close your eyes

In my lap, lay your head

And let my arms cress