a fly on ben's wall

Loving Scotty

2013-10-09T22:43:00.001-07:00

I met Scotty today. He was holding a cardboard sign, standing in the center divide of the road. I pulled up to the red light, called out to him, and offered him a clean pair of socks with a granola bar wrapped inside (homeless people always want and need clean socks!). He gladly took it. I asked his name, then if I could pray for him. He let me pray. What happened after the prayer touched my heart in a powerful way. Brace yourself...

A truck had pulled up behind me. As Scotty walked away, the man in the truck rolled down his window and handed Scotty an apple and a sandwich. Scotty thanked the man and walked away. The man turned back in his truck, and then handed out a bottle of juice and an orange. Scotty again thanked the man and walked away. The man in the truck noticed I had been watching the exchange and smiled at me. I smiled back and gave him a thumbs up. He gave me one back.

What touched me today was this thought: love is contagious! I am always more likely to jump in and help someone if I see someone else doing it too. But it's gotta start somewhere. When I worked at Starbucks, one person would pay for the car behind them, which would start a chain of cars all paying for the drinks behind them. Amazing to watch, but someone had to be first. Go infect someone with a little love today. It's likely they will pass it on.

New song! And FREE music!

2013-10-01T09:38:00.001-07:00

It's here! It's finally here! OK... here's the story:

I took my high school students (I'm a youth pastor) up to Hume Lake for summer camp. While there, they offer loads of activities to do during the afternoons, one of which is to go into their professional-grade studio for an hour. I thought that was a great deal and asked two of my students if they would want to record with me. They said yes!

So we practiced a song I had written in 2004 but had never recorded in a studio. We got the recording at the end of the week, and I finally finished the artwork, so here's my new song!

<a href="http://benpalm.bandcamp.com/album/see">see by Ben Palm</a>

I hope you enjoy listening to it! If you want, you could buy it for only $1! You'll get that song, but you'll get SO MUCH MORE! With the purchase, you get:

a download of the song "see"
a high-res back image with all the song credits and a couple extra pics
a second front cover, only available here
"Come Here Squirrels", an exclusive bonus track never before released!

Along with that, I've put up all my other music, available for download. Click on an album cover or title to go listen to it. See You There is FREE!

the rebirth ep by Ben Palm
for... by Ben Palm
A Little You by Ben Palm
See You There by Ben Palm

Here's some pics of us in the studio:

Writing a Great Worship Song

2013-02-13T22:22:00.000-08:00

In our quest to write the best songs, sometimes we look for help. There are many videos on YouTube that can help turn that good worship song into a GREAT worship song. Here is my favorite:

We went live!

2013-02-07T00:10:00.001-08:00

We got to play our song "My Soul Cries Out" in a worship set on Sunday, and it went really good! It was exciting for both Rob and I to share our song with the church. We are excited to continue using that song at church in addition to other songs we write!

First new song in 4 years!

2013-02-01T11:50:00.001-08:00

Here it is! The first new song I've written in 4 years! I think one thing that has helped me move forward in my writing was working with Rob Collins, who has been a fantastic partner in all of this. We gel together well, tossing out ideas that are similar enough that we both like them but different enough that we challenge each other.

Well, without further ado, here it is - "My Soul Cries Out" by Rob Collins and Ben Palm

I'm standing here before You, there's nothing left to say
You moved the heavens to find me, but I chose another way
I fought to find my freedom, to break these heavy chains
And though You saw me fully, You loved me just the same

I fall on my face
I yearn for Your grace
My soul cries out
You call me Your own
No longer alone
My soul cries out

I'm standing here before you, I am so amazed
The cross You bore to free me has set my heart ablaze
Creation sings Your praises, a song for every man
My fate was changed forever by the touch of Your hand

Holy holy holy is the Lord
Holy holy holy is the Lord

My sin washed away
By love's crimson stain
My soul cries out

New song! New blog?

2013-01-28T21:25:00.001-08:00

I just went on a fantastic retreat with my high school students... and the students from 13 other churches! It was amazing! I had a great time connecting with people from other churches and building the relationships with my students!

Two things came from this retreat:

A NEW SONG. Rob, my writing partner, had sent me lyrics a few weeks ago that he wanted me to put some music to. I took some time alone and started playing. After about half an hour, I had something I really liked. I recorded it, shared it with a few people around me, and to my amazement, I overheard them singing it throughout the rest of the weekend! I sent over my recording to Rob, and he loved it! Can't wait to finish the song (it needs a bridge) and play it with the band!
A NEW BLOG... MAYBE. I co-taught a seminar on sex/purity to the high school students. We opened up the floor for questions, and we got a TON - so many we couldn't answer them all! I've thought about starting a blog that would tackle one of those questions each week - what do you think?

Music - a new chapter!

2013-01-10T21:30:00.000-08:00

Hi. As some of you may know, I used to write music. A lot. But then some wonderful blessings came along...

Gabriel (1 1/2) and Micah (3 1/2)

See?

Up until a few weeks ago, I hadn't written in four years. Though I had tried every now and then to sit down and write, nothing really developed. Nothing. This was frustrating to a guy who has written over 50 songs.

So I kinda gave up. I let it sit, thinking my writing days were over.

I don't remember where my idea came from, but there I was, on the phone with Rob, asking him if he wanted to write a worship album with me. Bizarre. But I had been feeling passionate about worship music recently. I knew Rob was a great lyricist (so he told me), and I knew I could write music well, so I called. And he said yes.

We sat down to write our first song together. I showed him a musical idea I had written in 2003 (or somewhere around there). He liked it, and we started working on some lyrics. After about an hour, we had what we felt was a good start. We agreed to sit on what we had and revisit it a week later. But we both agreed this writing team was a God-ordained match. We really gelled.

After a week, we got back together, both agreeing that the song needed work. We went back and forth on a couple of ideas, and finally landed on a fit for the song that we really liked. After playing it with a full band behind us, we knew we had our first song ready to go. It's called "My Soul Cries Out."

I will continue to keep you updated regarding the future of our worship album, including lyrics, audio files, and news on our progress! Thanks for reading - I'm glad you're on the journey with us!

Micah 6:8

2009-11-15T22:50:00.001-08:00

Sometimes God smacks me with a Bible verse – like today. Micah 6:8 has come across my path FOUR TIMES today! A version you might be familiar with is this:

He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

Today, I had my Message Bible with me in church, so I read it in that version for the first time. I pray you’re just as inspired as I was by these words:

But he's already made it plain how to live, what to do, what GOD is looking for in men and women. It's quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love, And don't take yourself too seriously-- take God seriously.

I love that. I will be meditating on this verse this week. I don’t know what God has in store for me, but I’m going to pursue this. If you wish to, join me in my meditation!

Ezekiel 20 – continued disobedience in the face of forgiveness

2009-10-28T01:11:00.001-07:00

I want to begin by pointing out to the few of you that follow my blog that although I have not written in a while, it does not mean that I have ceased reading as was the case before. I either wanted to internalize what I read or wasn’t in a place fit for writing, but either way, I was still reading! I encourage you to go back through chapters 16-19 to see what’s going on (especially 16 – that one got me good!)…

In Ezekiel 20, elders of Israel come to Ezekiel for a word from the Lord and get a history lesson. God points out to them how time after time He would show them the way to live, they would turn the other way, and He would forgive. God has had enough. He tells Israel how to find forgiveness, but He also tells of coming judgment. Israel is in trouble.

Ezekiel ends by saying, “Ah, Sovereign LORD! They are saying of me, `Isn't he just telling parables?'” In other words, the Israelite elders aren’t buying what Ezekiel’s telling them! Not only have they been foolish in not following God, but they are now being foolish in not believing His words!

I am SO guilty of this! I’ll be in the depths of my sin and instead of listening to God to find a way out, I’ll continue ignoring Him and decide that I still know what’s best. FOOLISH! God, help me be wise! Help me see my foolishness before it’s too late!

Ezekiel 15 – short but sweet

2009-10-04T00:07:00.001-07:00

This is a short chapter, but it packs a powerful punch. God simply says that Israel will not escape His wrath. Too often we foolishly think we can get away with things, but we can’t. God sees all and knows our hearts. We need to be honest with God, others, and ourselves.

On another note, I came in second today in a disc golf tournament! I played in the same tournament last year and did horribly – this year I finished on the top (#2 out of over 60 people!).

I had a thought: maybe I did well because I’ve been investing in God’s Word more! Do you think God works this way? Do you think He blesses us when we are obedient to Him? I’d love to hear your thoughts…

Ezekiel 14 – recapture me!

2009-10-03T00:17:00.001-07:00

I grew up on Michael Card, and I greatly enjoyed his music (I still do!). For my birthday one year, my mom offered to get me a two-disc set of his, but we both thought incorrectly that it was called The Word and I was given the CD to the left…

This must have been God-ordained, for one song on the album stood out to me – Recapture Me. That phrase “recapture me” is repeated over and over in the song. Michael Card writes out of Scripture and bases many of his albums on different Biblical passages. This one is based on the prophets, and I read in the liner notes that this song was pulled out of Ezekiel 14. I read the chapter and was blown away. I just read it and was blown away again!

God desires to recapture my heart. He desires to recapture your heart. Sure, most of the chapter is about God’s wrath and judgment, but He talks about His desire to recapture the hearts of those that had walked away.

I know He has pursued and recaptured my heart – time after time after time after time. Has He pursued your heart? Has He recaptured it? I’d love to hear how He’s done that for you. He did it for me in Mexico when I had given up hope in Him.

Ezekiel 13 – measure twice, cut once

2009-09-29T21:08:00.001-07:00

My dad always told me to “measure twice, cut once.” In other words, be sure of what you’re doing before you do something you can’t undo.

God is saying the same thing to Israel. He is telling Ezekiel to fight against the false prophets – people that are saying God has told them something when really He hasn’t. In doing so, they have given people false hope and have really hurt them instead of helping them.

This simply points me back to the Bible. As I preach from it, am I confident in what I’m teaching? Am I giving people a right message? This is serious business – I don’t want to be wrong. The results could be devastating.

Ezekiel 12 – a second chance for the few…

2009-09-28T23:16:00.001-07:00

God asks Ezekiel to act out a symbolic sketch of what is to come. He wants Israel to see what is going to happen to them – that they are going to be sent into exile. He also wants them to know that most will die – only a few will be spared.

“They will know that I am the LORD, when I disperse them among the nations and scatter them through the countries. But I will spare a few of them from the sword, famine and plague, so that in the nations where they go they may acknowledge all their detestable practices. Then they will know that I am the LORD.” (vv. 15-16)

I am one of the few. I am in a sort of exile, and I am finally acknowledging my detestable practices.

As you can see from the date of my last entry and the date of this one, I haven’t been in God’s Word. I have been doing the very things I warned against in past posts.

“I know that I will be blessed if I’m obedient… I need to be.”

“Too often I’m quick to shower myself with God’s grace. When I sin, I tell myself that it’s ok and that God will forgive me.”

“I shouldn’t take my sin so lightly.”

“How much will it take for you to really understand God? Do you know how serious He is about sin? Do you know He wants your whole life? Or are you just playing the game because you know how to act ‘Christian?’”

“How repentant am I over sin? Do I grieve over my mistakes, or do I simply let them slide?”

“DO NOT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF GOD’S GRACE!”

Through a friend, I’ve been brought back to the place I need to be – repentant and in His Word. I am thankful that I am one of the spared, and I am praying that I will remain in God’s Word where I so desperately need to be. I’m a pastor. An example. I need to be leading others to Jesus. How can I do that if I myself am not in tune with Him?

God, forgive me. I repent. Continue to bring my repentant heart to You. Amen.

Ezekiel 11 – an opportunity for redemption

2009-04-02T23:53:00.001-07:00

God calls the remnant of Israel on their wickedness and confronts them with their fears in hopes that they change their ways. Ezekiel asks if any will be saved, and God finally gives a little hope…

“They will return to [Israel] and remove all its vile images and detestable idols. I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. Then they will follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. They will be my people, and I will be their God.” vv. 18-20

If only it ended there. In my Bible, the next word is “But.” God says that if they stay tied to their vile images, He will destroy them (summed up). Ezekiel’s vision (which started in chapter 8) ends, and he shares everything with the remnant of Israel.

Two things jump out – first, Ezekiel is a faithful guy. He is devoted to Israel, weeping over the lost and begging God to save some. He is more so devoted to God, being faithful to carry out his job – share the message with the remnant. Ezekiel is not talked about enough in churches. He is an excellent role model of faithfulness.

Second, when God gives you a chance, take it! Yes, He is a gracious God, but He is also a just God. If you keep turning Him down, He will not take pity on you come judgment day. DO NOT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF GOD’S GRACE!

Ezekiel 10 – a short break…

2009-03-31T23:59:00.001-07:00

Ezekiel is still in the vision that began in chapter 8, and he sees the four creatures from chapter 1, realizing they are the same four creatures. He describes them, God joins them, and they move around accompanied by wheels.

God, thank you for a short break. Thank you for a focus on something other than man’s depravity. It is good to remember how glorious You are. You are a good God. Amen.

Ezekiel 9 – to mark or not to mark?

2009-03-30T23:30:00.001-07:00

God is still showing Ezekiel around “Christmas Carol” style, and this time, Ezekiel sees the death of what seems like most of Israel. God has a guy go out and put a mark on everyone who is grieving over their sin. God also has six other guys follow the marking guy. These six are told to kill everyone that doesn’t get a mark.

As Ezekiel sees the massive bloodshed, he weeps over the dead, wondering if any will be spared. God simply replies, “…I will not look on them with pity or spare them, but will bring down on their own heads what they have done” (v. 10).

This is one more reminder of how serious God is about sin, but this time there is a new side of God we see. God honors and protects the repentant heart. He sees those who truly mourn over their sin and has compassion on them.

This ties in exactly to what we’re going to be talking about on Sunday! We’re talking about the Last Supper when Jesus foretells the sins of Peter and Judas. One of the big differences in these stories is the aftermath of their sin. Peter realizes his mistake, repents, and becomes a cornerstone of the church. Judas realizes his mistake and thinks so little of himself that he commits suicide.

How repentant am I over sin? Do I grieve over my mistakes, or do I simply let them slide? God, break my heart over my sin. Give me a heart that grieves and aches. Amen.

Ezekiel 8 – the ghost of Christmas… Israel?

2009-03-28T01:03:00.001-07:00

After Ezekiel’s year-plus of lying on his side, God shows him another vision. In this vision, he is taken around Jerusalem and shown detestable things that Israelites are doing. Each time he is shown something, God tells him that he will see something even more detestable. At the end of the journey, God tells Ezekiel that He will not listen to them and will deal with them in anger.

This is just another reminder of how seriously God views sin. Each of the detestable things these people are doing are focused around worshipping false gods or idols. God has no patience with people that worship things other than Him. In this day and age, it is too easy to slip into idol worship – putting something before God.

God, please don’t help me fall into this trap. Help me to put you first today and every day. Amen.

Ezekiel 6-7 – Punishment is here!

2009-03-26T23:44:00.001-07:00

God has already made it clear that sin is no laughing matter with Him. In this passage, He talks about Israel receiving their punishment for the things they have done (their punishment being death). He talks in detail of how they will die and that they will be repaid for their conduct. But…

The one thing that struck me in this passage was the repetition of the phrase, “Then you/they will know that I am the LORD.” This phrase always followed a detailed description of the punishment that was going to befall the Israelites, and every time I read it, I thought to myself, “It took that much for them to figure out who God is?”

How much will it take for you to really understand God? Do you know how serious He is about sin? Do you know He wants your whole life? Or are you just playing the game because you know how to act “Christian?” I played the game for a long time. I still catch myself playing the game every now and then. This was a good reminder that I don’t want to need a wake up call like the one the Israelites got.

God, help me know You. Help me be passionate for You. Help me remember to pursue You with my whole heart so I may not fall away like the Israelites of Ezekiel’s day. Amen.

Ezekiel 4-5 – God shows Ezekiel how He will punish their sin

2009-03-25T19:52:00.001-07:00

God uses Ezekiel to symbolically show Israel’s destruction. He has Ezekiel lie on his side a day for every year of Israel and Judah’s sin – 40 days/years for Judah, and 390 days/years for Israel! Not only did Ezekiel have to lie on his side for over a year for Israel’s sin, but Israel was living in rebellion for almost 400 years! God also has Ezekiel build a mini-Jerusalem, play out a mini-siege, and use his hair (off of his now-shaved head) to symbolize how the Israelites are going to die.

What stands out to me in all of this is how seriously God takes Israel’s sin. Not only is He ready to wipe them out for their sin, but He uses them as an example to the surrounding nations. I think He has Ezekiel go through all of the symbolism to grasp the gravity of Israel’s rebellion.

This God that took Israel’s sin that seriously is the same God of today. He is the God we pray to, the God we worship, and the God we serve. Is He still forgiving? Yes. Is there still room for grace? Yes. But along with all of that is an anger that God has against sin. I think Paul said it best:

“What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?” –Romans 6:1-2

Too often I’m quick to shower myself with God’s grace. When I sin, I tell myself that it’s ok and that God will forgive me. Though this is true, I shouldn’t take my sin so lightly. God sees it as a serious issue, and so should I.

So should you.

Ezekiel 2-3 – God readies Ezekiel for his ministry

2009-03-24T18:17:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I was anxious to hear what God was going to say to Ezekiel. Today I got to read His words, and they were good.

God is preparing Ezekiel for the ministry he is about to do. He tells Ezekiel a little bit about the people he’s going to be speaking to – they are Israelite exiles that are rebellious and hard-hearted to God.

God clearly knows this is going to be difficult for Ezekiel, so He gives Ezekiel what he’s going to need. God makes him just as unyielding and hardened as they are, He encourages Ezekiel that his only job is to get God’s word out, He keeps Ezekiel from saying anything but God’s words, and He shows Ezekiel His glory again.

I was struck by two things – how well God prepares Ezekiel for ministry and how obedient Ezekiel is to God’s call on his life. Whenever God asks Ezekiel to do something, Ezekiel follows, and he is always blessed by being obedient.

I’ve tried to be in tune to God’s call and direction for my life, but I have a hard time listening on a daily basis. I know that I will be blessed if I’m obedient – I’ve already been blessed by being obedient and reading His word. But often I’m not obedient in other areas. I need to be. I want to be blessed. Don’t you?

Ezekiel 1 – the glory of the LORD

2009-03-23T19:01:00.001-07:00

About 5 or 6 years ago, I tried to tackle a difficult task – studying the book of Ezekiel. I did a surface study, never plunging in too deep, and I never finished it.

I now aim to dive a little deeper, understand a little more, and bask in God’s presence a little more. I invite you to join me on my quest.

Ezekiel 1

The first chapter has a very similar feel to Revelation – it begins with a vision Ezekiel sees. He first sees four living creatures (Rev. 4:6). He goes on to describe their radiance, including their adornments, their physical makeup, wheels under them, and their wings over them. He uses the phrase “Wherever the spirit would go, they would go” twice (vv. 12, 20), and talks of them and the wheels going straight ahead (vv. 9, 12, 17), as if they had one objective and one focus, as should we.

All this felt like it was building to something. The climax begins in verse 25, where Ezekiel describes a throne and a man sitting on it that looks like fire. The last verse of the chapter sums up the beauty of this description, and it displays Ezekiel’s poetic imagery:

“Like the appearance of a rainbow in the clouds on a rainy day, so was the radiance around Him. This was the appearance of the likeness of the glory of the LORD. When I saw it, I fell facedown, and I heard the voice of one speaking.”

As I read this, two things came to mind. First of all, I’m DYING to know what the voice says. I know the answer is just on the next page, but I’m purposely waiting until tomorrow to keep my suspense up, build my anticipation, and keep me excited about diving into the Bible.

Second, I am reminded of how glorious our God is. I love that Ezekiel uses the image of a rainbow because I love rainbows. They are beautiful, breathtaking, and hard to take your eyes off of.

I definitely do not fall facedown before my God enough. I am more accustomed to viewing him as my friend than I am as the glorious and awesome God He is. I am thankful He loves me and thankful He wants to be my friend, but He would be nothing without His glory. I am blessed by the reminder I received today of His glory and radiance. He deserves to be WORSHIPPED and ADORED.

God, help me to give You the glory, worship, and adoration You’re due. Thank you for loving me in spite of me, and thank you for drawing me to you. Amen.

my best friend, my worst enemy

2009-03-14T17:58:00.001-07:00

please pray. i’ve been procrastinating for too long, and now i have a lot of school work to do in a short amount of time. i have a hard time sitting down and working, as i would just rather hang out with people.

also please pray as laura and i could possibly be moving within the week! this process is all happening faster than i’d like, but it looks like a good location and a good situation for us.

thanks!

curses on YouTube

2009-02-28T23:53:00.000-08:00

stinkin YouTube. i made this memories video from the winter retreat with my kids (shown below), and they muted the audio because of "copyright infringement." the dumbest thing ever. i understand them wanting to keep people from posting TV shows and such, but this is just some pictures with music behind! the fools. well, here it is for your enjoyment. take that, YouTube. you can't find me everywhere!

DVR - the epitome of creation

2009-02-19T23:05:00.000-08:00

tv bores me. there are still some good shows on, but i think the reality show era has run its course. have you ever seen Biggest Loser? i love the show (go filipe and sione!), but the way they dddddrrrrrrrraaaaaaaagggggggg it out... are you kidding me? they begin the show with "last week on Biggest Loser," and then right before every commercial, they tell you what's coming after the commercial. right after the commercial, they show you what just happened before the commercial. seriously?

i enjoyed the auditions for season 8 of American Idol, but i don't think i'm going to watch much of the show. it took them two hours to have 12 people sing one song each and hear the judges' comments. THEN they had another full one-hour show just to tell us which 3 of the 12 got the most votes. God bless DVR.

do you ever wish you had a DVR for your life? a rewind, a pause, a fast forward? what are you doing with your moments? would you spend three of your valuable hours on American Idol... each week?

i'm not always the best at using my time wisely. but seeing that really put some stuff in perspective. i hope it does the same for you. spend the moments where they matter. oh, and root for Danny.

wicked(ness)

2009-02-18T17:56:00.000-08:00

i went and saw Wicked yesterday with my family. it was AMAZING! the music - addicting! the sets - astounding! the story - captivating! it did make me think, though...

when i opened up the promo book my mom bought, i saw this quote: "are people born wicked or is wickedness thrust upon them?" (don't worry... i won't spoil anything for those of you that haven't seen it) it's pretty clear from the quote that the play aims to show that the wicked witch was forced into her wickedness - that she had no intention to be wicked but eventually had no choice but to be wicked. although this concept works for the play and we do create some understanding for the witch, this idea is a bunch of hooie.

you always have a choice. elphaba (the witch) had a choice. sure, people made her out to be wicked, but she did not have to adopt what was "thrust" upon her. too often, we use that same excuse for ourselves. "i didn't want to be bad... i was forced to be!" garbage. pure garbage.

i can't get enough of the new cd by RED (redmusiconline.com) called Innocence & Instinct. the first song is called "Fight Inside," which is one of my favorites on the album. here's some of the lyrics:

enemy / familiar friend / my beginning and my end / knowing truth / whispering lies / and it hurts again / what i fear and what i try / the words i say and what i hide / all the pain / i want it to end / but i want it again / and it finds me / the fight inside is coursing through my veins / and it's raging / the fight inside is breaking me again

wickedness is not thrust upon you. it's a battle. it's something you fight for and against. you know what the right thing is to do, but often, you don't do it. it happened me today at work. i wanted to get work done, but i wanted to play dumb games on my comupter. it's a fight.

maybe you agree. maybe you don't. either way, let me know what you think with your comments below...