A Journey With Cancer - My Story

Musical Interlude

2014-03-13T20:11:00.001+00:00

I made a piece of music inspired by this last visit to the Oncologist Available here All Field Recordings made on a trip across town to visit my Oncologist on November 18 2011. Bass and Drums and little riff added in winter 2013. My third piece made from Field Recordings. This time with Ableton and a rhythmic structure.

Good News

2008-11-24T21:23:00.002+00:00

Last week I had another PET/CT scan at Alliance Medical and saw Guri Sandhu to get the results. There was no sign of the tumour that was previously visible, so I got my first "all clear". Obviously we will be keeping an eye on things for some time to come - but good news from the first proper check up!

Returned from Holidays

2008-10-08T07:47:00.002+01:00

We had 3 (!) amazing and recuperative holidays. We went to a Health Spa in the UK for 5 days that was very relaxing, and then we travelled by train to the Austrian Alps, for 2 weeks in the village of Lech. Lots of great walking. After a few days in London we went to Coverack in Cornwall (where I spent many happy holidays as a child) for a week in a lovely cottage. Also walking everyday.

I will post some pictures and videos soon.

Small update

2008-08-11T22:50:00.003+01:00

Last week my throat was VERY sore, but 2 or 3 days ago I noticed things starting to improve - I could eat better and eat more solid food too. So I think things are on the mend. Still no taste, but a hint of taste sensation returning, a glimmer of light!

Today I had the rig tube out and that was another mini-milestone. My body was glad to see it go. I have lost a bit more weight, but I am still a very healthy weight - in fact I wouldn't mind to stay at this weight.

Started up my gym membership again - tomorrow I go for a gentle workout. Going hiking in September so must get in shape.

Hollywood Movies

2008-08-03T21:19:00.003+01:00

Saw 2 movies this weekend:

The Black Knight - I found it uninvolving and a bit tedious. Obviously the Batmobile is cool.

WALL.E - Genius! Loved it.

A small piece of Bach

2008-08-03T21:17:00.000+01:00

Made with the Virus TI

Small (128) mp3:

Large (320) mp3:

Last Treatment completed!

2008-08-01T15:55:00.002+01:00

A psychologically important moment. I know that my throat may get a little worse over the next week or so, but the bombardment by the healing rays has stopped. I celebrate with a visit to The Listening Rooms, and an Acupuncture session, and lunch at Carluccio's with my wife, Nicki.

Also spend the afternoon playing with my Access Virus TI Desktop

and working on a Gliss mix

:-)

One more Radiotherapy treatment go

2008-07-31T16:45:00.000+01:00

That makes me happy!

The next day

2008-07-31T16:39:00.003+01:00

.......... I felt a lot better - massively rejuvenated in fact. I "enjoyed" (managed to eat!) Sausage and Mash at The Wells, and generally had a very busy day, including a useful Alexander Lesson in the evening with Harvey. And I finished this book:

though I can't claim to understand it. :-)

Blood Transfusion

2008-07-31T16:32:00.004+01:00

John was my nurse for blood transfusion day,

Leodivine had already put a line into my arm before I arrived in my room, where I spent the next 6 hours having 500 cc of blood dripped/pumped into me. I finished this book:

Anaemic again.

2008-07-29T07:46:00.002+01:00

I had my usual Monday meting with Simon yesterday - he is generally pleased with my progress, but declined to do a video summing up :-) It is now my last week of radiotherapy. My weight is continuing to drop, but I am still a healthy weight (not using the rig tube yet), so he and I are not over concerned. Simon indicated that my hearing would recover - which made me happy! Indeed, there was a noticeable improvement yesterday and today better still.

However I am anaemic again so I have to go into hospital today for 2 more units of blood. A six or seven hour process. Thanks, whoever donated this blood.

My radiotherapy has been moved to 09:00 to allow time for the transfusion in the rest of the day.

A beautiful plant

2008-07-27T20:11:00.003+01:00

Saw this lovely plant on our Sunday Hampstead walk.

Hearing Issues

2008-07-27T20:08:00.003+01:00

After the last dose of chemo I seem to have lost some high frequency from my hearing, which is upsetting, although I think it is improving as the week goes on. I am also getting occasional high pitched whines in either ear. This tinnitus doesn't last long and isn't very loud, but still......

Obviously I will be quizzing Dr Stewart on Monday.

No appetite :-(

2008-07-24T13:39:00.002+01:00

I can't really face much solid food, but I am drinking fresh Juices and Fruit shakes with Food Supplements and Soups so looking after my body as best I can, with gratitude and compassion for all that it has gone through.

Tuesday was a busy day

2008-07-24T13:33:00.005+01:00

Woke up on Tuesday morning to find the rig tube was half out, and then when I tried deflating the balloon there was no fluid in it. I called Simon for advice and he had me come straight down to the ENT clinic at Charing Cross, where I waited a bit nervously until the very capable Isabella took the old one out and shoved a new one in. It was a bit of a push too as the stomach wall had already started to close up. But went off quickly and painlessly.

I had already called the Radiographers and arranged to see them later, so everything worked out fine.

Very tired - got home at 19:00, watched The WIRE series 5 episode 1 which I had recorded the night before, and then slept for 12 hours.

Chemo on Monday

2008-07-24T13:30:00.004+01:00

Chemo "takes it out of me" I guess - that's why there's been no news. Anyway it went off fine and Freda looked after me all day.

My blood tests from last Friday showed a slightly raised red blood cell count, so I didn't need blood this time, which was encouraging. Left the hospital in the early evening.

Tomorrow

2008-07-20T20:44:00.002+01:00

Tomorrow I get the last dose of chemo (cisPlatin) and possibly blood (if I need it), so I will be in the Cromwell Hospital most of the day.

10 more days of Radiotherapy (20 days completed). There are marks on my neck now (like a medium sunburn - we are treating it with a mixture of Skin Oils and Aloe Vera) and the inside of m mouth is getting a little sore. Not too bad though, not too bad at all.

Appetite diminishing

2008-07-20T20:39:00.003+01:00

It IS getting harder and harder to eat (psychologically as much as anything) but I did enjoy a Masala Dosa at Woodlands this lunchtime. Somehow it seemed to agree with me, even though I can't really taste anything. Lots of smoothies and juices and soups at the moment.

Infection around rig tube

2008-07-20T17:49:00.002+01:00

The last few days it has been a bit sore around the rig tube site. There is obviously a small infection. I mentioned it to Nurse Mary she took a swab and had it analysed and matched to various antibiotics. I forget the name of the bacteria. Anyway I guess Simon thinks I have had enough antibiotics so I didn't get any. Mary suggested a dressing, which I tried, but somehow the infection seemed to fester under the dressing and became even more uncomfortable, so yesterday I dispensed with dressing and after I had cleaned it again Nicki sprayed the area with colloidal silver. (Repeated twice a day) Now it seems to be improving I am happy to report.

Adam and Dana send a card

2008-07-20T17:45:00.001+01:00

Adam and Dana who manage me in the USA sent me a nice card.

Thanks folks!

Pentagram # 1

2008-07-20T17:32:00.004+01:00

A five pointed star popped into my mind in an exercise I was doing with therapist Claudia. I wanted to draw one and a little research revealed that it can be done with straight edge and compass (this fact has been known for 2500 years approx, but was new to me). So I went to Ryman and bought the equipment. Above you see my first attempt.

And.....

2008-07-17T21:54:00.003+01:00

It is not that we should be collaborating more, and are in competition, it is a question of realisation. In actual fact we collaborate enormously. We are not isolated.

The cake is collaboration and the competition is just tiny swirls in the icing on the top. Her icing swirl is higher than his icing swirl. But the cake, the cake itself is all co-operation and collaboration.

I cannot afford a doctor or a therapist to myself. Thank you all the other patients and clients who are co-operating with me to share the doctor & therapist. Thanks to everyone else who buys electricity, and water. Thanks to the tube passengers who share my journey (and the cost of my journey). I cannot do it alone.

etc. etc.

We are constantly collaborating and co-operating, yet somehow we forget, we deny, we ignore it. What a terrible falsehood, and where is it leading us in our isolation and in our denial?

Society - a short comment

2008-07-17T10:05:00.003+01:00

A few years ago I marvelled at how many people are involved in my Breakfast. This Blog brings it home too - what a huge web of relationships we are all in. Easy to forget sometimes. I was reading a collection of writings by Albert Einstein and he pointed out how indebted to society we all are. Few of us grow our own food or build our own houses. Culture and Language we owe to society.

Somehow in the last few decades it seems to have been possible to adopt the (crazy) idea that it is possible to live alone and outside society - simply exchanging MONEY with society to get the things we need.

How different from life in the village when we would have known the baker, the farmer, the miller, the carpenter and their families.

The bonds and inter-relationships of society - so important and so neglected.

Danger to Hearing?

2008-07-17T09:53:00.003+01:00

When I met David at the Maggie Centre he was concerned to let me know that he had been told his Radiotherapy might leave him deaf. Obviously I was concerned, but I presumed Simon Stewart would have told me about this - he knows what I do for a job. So last Friday I spoke to someone in the RT clinic at the Cromwell and we looked at the scans of my head. He indicated that there was no real radiation in the area of my ears, and figured there was no danger.

I expressed my concerns about radiation damage to my hearing to Simon when I had my usual Monday meeting with him. He has no worries about that.

The danger, he says, is the cis Platin. (One more dose to go)

Last week's favorite record

2008-07-13T20:52:00.002+01:00

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