A Little Less Comfortable

The Helicopter Mom

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 15:41:00 +0000

As a stay at home mom, I feel like sometimes, lines get blurred. I often wonder if I am in their face too much, if I am too controlling or maybe too relaxed. Being a mother of 15 month old twins is pretty isolating. 2 naps a day limit your time out and about and no school creates a void between you and the rest of the moms. When you are alone a lot, its hard to know how other mom's do it and how you compare. There is always doubt that I am not teaching them everything at the right time, that I am missing something...or worse, THEY are missing something. Like, when we go in for our 12 month check up (at 13 months, of course) and the pediatrician alerts me that they "should be saying a handful of words by 18 months". Oh, really? And if they are not, what would you like me to do? I speak to them constantly, I don't keep the T.V. on and I spend the better part of every day repeating "ball, ball, ball...water, water, water....dog, dog, dog..." Will I be thrown into some unknown mommy-jail if my kids are late? Oh and she throws in at the end "twin boys are usually very late when it comes to language development". Perfect.

But, I digress.

I am sure we all doubt our mom-skills from time to time. Yesterday (or was that last week...) I had a challenging day. It started by pulling several chunks of dog food from my kids mouth, which they found by scheming together...one held the dog food bin open and the other helped himself to a handful. Next, during a particularly horrific diaper change, twin A comes over to check out why mommy is making strange gagging noises. In his curiosity, he gets too close and inadvertently steps on the velcro tab with the only foot that still has a sock on (just my luck). At that same moment, someone calls my phone which inevitably leads to a frenzy (in their defense, they are just modeling observed behavior. I never know where my cell phone is so when it rings, a wild goose hunt ensues). So, he takes off to find the source of the ringing, dragging the poopy diaper stuck to his foot. I have a twin hanging by his ankles and I have to make a decision, A) let my un-wiped twin go, risking butt prints all over the carpet and catch the runaway diaper or B) take care of said twin and hope that the velcro can't stand up to the exuberance of a baby on the hunt for a ringing cell phone. Turns out 7th Generation doesn't mess around with their velcro. But, luckily for me, the diapers is still wadded up and nothing nasty escapes. After a little disinfecting and a "Praise Jesus", I need a pick-me-up.

We arrive at the Peacock Family Center, a play room for toddlers. We have a bunch of them here since we only get rain in the winter. I am not the only one with a need for a break from the norm. The place is filled with at least 5 other mommy-kid teams. We all smile and say hello. Once we start playing and everyone relaxes and I get the immediate sense my feelings as a failure are about to be abolished.

There is a mother there with two girls, about 6 and 4. The older one has dark brown hair and my kids are immediately attracted to her (my 6 year old sister and the love of my kids life, has similar hair). So, as they follow her, I follow them and in turn, am right in the business of their hovering mother. It was quite the show. Every where they go, she is within 3 feet. She has a diaper bag stuffed full of snacks, juice boxes, tissues, hand sanitizer, a DVD player and, what I can only imagine to be, dress-up clothes (tutus, tiaras, magic wands). She is like the Fox News of moms. She is a running commentary for every move they make, every kid they come into contact with and every toy they touch.

"Sarah, don't climb on that, Maddy, stay with your sister, Sarah, look how cute that baby is, Sarah, don't get too close to the baby, Maddy, come see the baby, Sarah, you need a tissue, Maddy, are you thirsty, do you need to go potty, come let me re-tie your shoe, Sarah, help me tie her shoe..."

It never stopped. She didn't ever seem satisfied with letting her kids play alone. If they sat down or stopped for one idle moment, she offered them another activity or something to stuff in their mouths. Good gracious woman!! I was 2 minutes from wanting to strangle her when I noticed something that made me laugh.

The girls never batted an eye. She would offer something or give a command and they wouldn't skip a beat in their activity. They did not even seem to hear her. She was literally chatting to herself. Then I started to feel bad. Maybe she had a problem. Is there some condition you can inherit or some phobia you can incur in childhood that causes this behavior? Like "silence-a-phobia" or "idle-a-phobia"? When they all went into the bathroom, the girls came out before the mother. I half expected to walk in there and find her duct taped to the toilet with a bouncy ball stuffed in her mouth.

I often find myself repeating the same command a few times with no response. Then I remember in my puppy-training, you give the command once and then make the puppy do what you asked. I say, come get your shoes on, please. No response (or worse, they look at me with that smirk and run the opposite way). I get up, take a hold of that meaty little hand and lead him back over to where I asked him to come in the 1st place. Is this pointless or necessary? I may never know. But, at least I am not talking my children into deafness.

I feel bad for all the characters involved in that mothers' constant verbal diarrhea. But, with a day covered in half-dissolved dog food and dirty diapers, I needed to see that hey, it could be worse!

Cry Baby

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 28 Sep 2010 17:47:00 +0000

For the most part, I am not a very outwardly emotional person. I can watch Sally Field have a hysterical fit at her daughter's funeral and not shed a tear. I can read every painstaking detail of poor Marley's end of life and nada.

But, when it comes to my family...it has become, well, a little out of control.

Stupid love and all its emotion. If I had known this before, I would have bought stock in waterproof mascara.

Holding my babies in church while we sing about God's love...I don't stand a chance. I am sure a lot of you have the same reaction. Its just too much!

But lately, its gotten even worse.

I am sitting on the floor cleaning off the wooden blinds one blade at a time. Twin A comes over with another rag he found on the floor and starts to help clean. His little diapered bum as he crouches down to where I am, his little chubby hand waving the rag over the blinds and that face as he looks over at me and smiles with all his teeth...be still my heart. I grab him and just soak him in. Good grief, I am tearing up just typing about it.

We go in for a vaccination. I am holding Twin A who is crying his eyes out from the prick and Twin B, in my husband's arms, reaches out to hug and console him with a look of such concern all over his little face. I have to fight to hold it together, for their sake, of course!

The worst of all: We are upstairs after bath time and having a dance party. We are listening to the Black Eyed Peas sing I Gotta Feeling. Twin A is wrapped around me and his chubby little hands are holding on to the back of my neck. He is giggling in my ear and I can feel his little breath as he is panting with excitement as we spin and spin and spin. I start crying and I can't even sing along!!! This is bad, who cries listening to Fergi?

What is wrong with me? I mean, emotionally, I get it. They are miracles, both of them. When I went in for my 1st ultra-sound (super early), there was only one baby. My 2nd ultra-sound revealed a second baby but they warned me that Twin B was significantly smaller and chances were he would not survive.

Truthfully, it's not that I "can't imagine my life without them", because it was only a little over a year ago that it was just Matt and me. It's not that I am crying out of fear of something bad happening to them, although I still lay my hand on their chest every night, checking for a rise and fall. I am just purely amazed by them. I am so humbled by their existence and the fact that I get to hold them and love them. The fact that they are little tiny beings, operating on their own, making decisions, having opinions and learning a mile a minute.

Bottom line: I am so thankful for them. I never WANT a life without them.

And as for the latest thing that brought me to tears? Proof that no matter what the doctors say, a life meant to be, will be...

Oh, crap.

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Thu, 09 Sep 2010 15:40:00 +0000

Nope, this post is not about poop. Although, I might have a bit to say on the subject.

My day's events can easily be grouped into 3 categories.

Oh Well. Oh Crap. Oh $%&!.

I was supposed to be out of the house 10 minutes ago in order to make it to the Dr. appointment on time. Oh well.

The boys have eaten dinner and are in bed. Now the adults need to do the same except there is nothing planned for a meal and the sheets are still in the washing machine. Oh crap.

I walk out the bedroom door and see that one of my children is hanging on, for dear life, to our dog as she attempts to head down the stairs and the other one is lifting up the toilet seat and plunking match box cars into the water. Oh $%&!.

I will, most definitely, hear one (or all) of these phrases come out of my children's mouth at some point in their life. Hopefully not before "I love you" but certainly before anything else charming or endearing. And one of the last 2 phrases will, most definitely, be said very loudly in front of (or to) my grandparents.

I don't know what life is like with girls. I like to think they sit around on pink puffs, orchestrating delicate tea parties, and carrying on meaningful conversations with their stuffed bear friends. However, after watching my 3 year old sister climb to the 2nd floor on the OUTSIDE of the staircase, I am assured that is not the case.

I know we all have that "holy crap, move quickly but slowly so as not to scare them but to grab them before they plummet to certain death". It starts with the moment you realize they are technically mobile. For months since they were born, they have laid perfectly still on any surface you place them. They sleep on the couch for hours and you can run to the bathroom confident they will be there when you return. But, one day, out of the blue, you come back to the horrific scene of your 2 month old dangling precariously off the edge of your couch. I swear, that is not where I left you!

It seems it only gets worse.

At the moment, the lack of true depth perception is the problem. They are so trusting and naive. But, just as I feared, trusting and naive turns to daring and fearless.

At the moment, we are somewhere in the middle.

Yesterday, my 1st gray hair moment:

We have a swinging gate at the top of the stairs. It was not latched all the way and twin A climbed up onto the door and it swung open over the top of the stairs, with him firmly attached.

No time to even say Oh $#&!, grab him.

He lives to swing another day. His eyes were as big as saucers. I couldn't tell if he was just in such disbelief of his great fortune to discover such a brilliant use for the baby gate or he was just in shock at how it all unfolded without any calculation. Maybe, he was just as terrified as I was.

Doubtful. When I caught my breath and finally stopped shaking, I put him down and he went right back and tried it again.

This, I know, is the first of many. Please share your moments and make me feel better!

BTW, the youtube video is of "Mutton Busting". The children's version of bull riding. My sister is begging my mom to let her try it. The 3rd rider is my favorite.

Wishes

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 21:12:00 +0000

Photo Credit: marydenise6

Things I wish you already knew:

Toilet paper is much more useful on the roll then off.

Your brother is not a ladder.

Dog food is for dogs.

Nap time is, quite simply, the best time of day.

The dramatic meltdown following the word "no" is completely unnecessary.

When you wrap your cubby arms around my neck, I want to give you anything you want.

You are my life.

Things I can't believe you already know:

When I say "no" and you smile with all your teeth, I try to turn around quickly so you don't see me laugh. You know exactly what you are doing.

When you point your tiny little finger at something, daddy will always hand it to you.

When you see mommy coming with the "I'm going to kiss your face off" look, run.

Music=dancing

Things I hope you never know:

Kids can be cruel.

Hospitals.

Anything less than unconditional love.

The Perfect Mother

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 01:20:00 +0000

Photo Credit: greatspacecoaster15

I aspire to be one of those mom's that seems to just revel in motherhood. Here is her scenerio:

She keeps a close watchful eye on all of her children while having an in-depth, intelligent conversation with you. Her child raises his hand to hit his sibling and the she says, all cool/calm/collected...Bobby, we do not hit.

The child submits, apologizes and hugs his sibling.

She doesn't miss a beat.

She continues the conversation as she pulls every ingredient for a well balanced lunch out of the fridge. She arranges everything neatly on the color-coordinated child-sized plates and lines them up along the bar.

She gives the lunch-is-ready signal. Everyone comes running.

Still in conversation, she helps each child wash their hands. They sit quietly, eat and asked to be excused.

No television, no non-organic processed foods, no tears or shrieks of unfairness. Somehow, amidst her poignant monologue regarding the importance of mothers volunteering in school and her persuasive argument against children referring to adults by their 1st name, she has cleaned and sanitized the entire kitchen.

I am the mother on the other side of the conversation. I have not heard a single word she said because I am so enthralled in watching her magically float through her day as if she were some close relative to Mary Poppins herself.

What kind of pills is this lady on and how can I get my hands on some?

No, I am not this kind of mom. My scenario is short and sweet.

I wrangle my squirming kids into their high chairs...

wait, what was I saying? Oh yeah, the new pool...

I rip apart lunch meat, avacados and jelly on bread.

Ok, where was I going with that? Right...the pool...

The dog is eating half the meal that gets thrown on the floor.

CHESSIE!! Go lay down! Boys, stop throwing food. Anyway, so back to the pool...

Kids are trying to slide themselves out of the high chair and their hair has been newly styled with avacado and jelly. The kitchen looks like a tornado hit.

I have no idea why I am talking about the pool so nevermind.

Whoever I am trying to carry on a conversation with makes a mental note to NEVER forget to take her birth control again.

By the time we are saying good by to The Perfect Mother and her children, the only explanation for the orderliness of her house is that she must have trained her children's toys to return to their toy box after being idle for longer than 5 minutes. A kind of "sleep mode". I look around my house and can only deduce that our toy's sleep mode was damaged prior to arrival. Or maybe it has something to do with the wooden hammer my mother bought them for their birthday. Either way, not my fault!

It is a circus here some days. But, man, I love every second of it. Those days, when I feel like the old woman who lived in a shoe...I imagine my life before them. Not a single day could rival what we have now. The Mary Poppins mom is awesome, more power to you if you have accomplished that life. But, if you are like me and you are sitting at your computer now with jelly stuck to your neck and avocado gunk in your hair, praise God for you. The jelly and avocado are the badges of loving from your babes...nothing could be sweeter!

Whip It!

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 16:55:00 +0000

Photo Credit: NainD

One fear I always had before getting pregnant...while pregnant...and now a year after being pregnant...is that I will never get back into shape. I don't mean just dropping the baby weight but really being able to run, hike or bike ride hard. For so many years of my life, I had a drill sergeant of sorts. Either a field hockey, tennis or lacrosse coach kicking my butt for months on end.

Ahhhh, those were the days! We ate whatever we wanted and burned it off the next morning. But, there was no option. You couldn't wake up in the morning, see that it was raining and breath a sigh of relief for the excuse to stay in bed an extra hour. And even now, I always have 268 reasons (laundry, cleaning, blogging, phone calls...) why I should stay in rather than run. Chores are not fun but neither is running.

The other day, the boys got a hold of the remote control and turned on the T.V. It happened to be on one of those non-child friendly channels, Bravo or MTV or something. I think it was Complaining With the Kardashians or Watch the Kardashian Family Implode, whatever the show is called. The smallest of the sisters, who had apparently just had a baby, was at the gym working out, getting ready for a photo shoot. What caught my attention was her reason for the photo shoot. She wants all women to know its possible to regain their pre-baby body.

Ok, I am intrigued...go on.

They show her at her gym...which is not your average YMCA. More like what Scottsdale people would refer to as a "Health Club". State of the art equipment and crazy apparatus that help you tone everything from your love handles to your chin fat. Oh, and did I mention her gorgeously sculpted trainer programing her every move?

Are you serious, lady? That club membership probably costs $5k a month and that angry goddess following you around, yelling in your face is probably another $2k a month. Really, ALL WOMEN??

Unfair. Lady, get out on the pavement, in the heat of the summer, alone (or behind 30lbs of double stroller) in your $12 Old Navy sweats and 2 year old Nikes, and try it the poor-person way. Then, tell me about how ALL women can do it.

A friend of mine (thanks Heidi!) sent me this short article about a similar situation with Gwyneth Paltrow. She had her 2nd baby and claims we new mom's have no excuse. The article details her workouts...2 hours a day with a celebrity trainer. Man, did she get blasted. Everyone commenting had the same view I initially did watching Ms. Kardashian on T.V. But, then I read her actual comment further down the article.

"Every woman can make time - every woman - and you can do it with your baby in the room," she said. "There have been countless times where I've worked out with my kids crawling around all over the place. You just make it work, and if it's important to you, it'll be important to them."

Ok, so it got me thinking a bit more rationally and I think she is actually right. I am a stay-at-home-mom (SAHM, yup...we have an acronym). My kids happen to be the same age and are doing the same things. There is plenty of time during the day that I am sitting in the play room with them, interacting. I could get a little more active. I could even pop in my Wii Fitness disc and do it while they are exploring the 1st floor. On Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays, my husband gets the boys and I out for a run down to the park and back. I run much longer with him than I would without. Unfortunately for me, he is one of those guys who could hibernate for the winter, wake up for Spring and run a 6 minute mile. So, its usually me jogging and him literally running circles around me.

But, when we get home, man...I feel so good.

And that, ladies, is what keeps me going. For that hour or so...its about ME. The second I became pregnant...I knew my life was no longer my own. I had two other people whose needs came before mine. Its wonderful and often comes without a thought. But, I can't altogether loose myself in my children or my laundry. I have to have something that is just mine. A couple moments in the day where I am not listening for a need to be met. I can run, push myself, strive for something selfish.

That is my story and I'm stickin' to it!

Anyone else have any great ways of getting back into shape?

Control

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Sun, 08 Aug 2010 04:55:00 +0000

Photo Credit: kenny1970

This word is a struggle for me. I constantly strive for it only to be disappointed when I realize it hardly exists.

control |kənˈtrōl|noun1 the power to influence or direct people's behavior or the course of events : the whole operation is under the control of a production manager |the situation was slipping out of her control.
As a mom, I feel like the expert. From the beginning, I could tell their cries apart. I knew who had the better latch, who's poop would smell the worst and who wouldn't stop eating even if he was full. Then the details intensified and the list became a book.
When they wake up, they are starving, put in a movie to distract them until the eggs are ready and cool.Don't let them see the fruit before they eat the meal.They know its nap time as soon as they are pointed in the direction of their room. They will cry, forge ahead and they will be fine.If they are fighting over a toy, let them duke it out. Always have 2 toys for distraction during diaper changes. One is for the victim of the diaper change and the other is for the observer who will inevitably steal that toy for himself.They love to be in the tub as its filling up with water. If Evan starts to cry, he is not joking. Distract him immediately and he will be fine.If Alex starts to cry, give him a hug, he just needs attention.
We all have them for our own children. I assume they get less involved as the child gets older. I think this is why its so hard for new parents to leave their children with a babysitter.
And now we get onto the subject at hand.
This morning, my dear sweet husband utters the sexiest words a daddy can say:"Honey, go back to sleep, I will get the boys."
Its only rival is the ever so elusive:"Go ahead to the spa for the day, I will stay with the boys."
He turns off the monitor and quietly shuts the door behind him. I take a deep breath, pull the covers over my head and imagine deep deep sleep for the next hour.
But then I hear it. Faintly at first, then louder...
Whining.
Did he put the movie on?
Did he put some cheerios on their tray to hold them over?
Will he know to really cool the eggs down so they don't burn them?
Am I actually laying here in peace pondering if my Naval Academy Graduate, Nuclear Engineer of a husband can feed our children???!!!
You are ridiculous, shut your eyes and get some much deserved sleep.
Whining.
Ignore it.
Louder whining.
He can handle it.
Crying.
Ok, maybe I just go down for a second.
Louder crying.
I find myself standing in the kitchen with the spatula, cooking eggs.
A little disclaimer before you write me off as a nut case...we live across the country from our families. We have been parenting alone (it was all our idea) and so its not ingrained in me to rely on someone else for help.
I want to let go. I know my husband is GREAT with the boys. I know he is fully capable yet I still fly out of bed at the 1st auditory signal of distress. And its not like they never cry in my presence. I don't cater to their every need. They get told no, they get told "hush", and they certainly get told "you need to be patient".
So, why can't I do it? Why can't I give up the reins a bit? Will this get better with time?
In other words...tell me I am not going to be like this forever!!

Spice.It.Up.

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 16:11:00 +0000

My husband and I met in the early summer of 2004. After a whirl-wind long distance romance, tons of plane tickets, bittersweet hello's & good-byes and many many minutes on the phone...we got hitched in Nov. 2005. It was a super traditional Naval Academy wedding and everything we hoped it would be. The point of the day was to promise our love and lives to each other before God and our God-loving family. We asked them to commit to helping us uphold those promises.

My parents are one of those sickening couples. Sickeningly cute, that is. They hug and kiss and talk nicely to each other. They are not perfect. I still hear my mom scream down the hallway "TAKE OFF YOUR MUDDY SHOES!!" as my dad tracks in godknowswhat from a fishing trip. But, in the end, he works hard, she works hard, they have a mutual love and respect and they are happy. Last time I was home, I had an ah-ha moment. It has stuck with me ever since.

They have been married for 30 years. More than half their life. They have been poor and not-so-poor. They parented 2 kids, became empty nesters, then parented again. They have had car accidents, surgeries, lost loved ones, vacationed in awesome places...they have lived. But, even through all the distractions, when my dad walks in the door from work, my mom literally drops what she is doing and runs to meet him at the door. They hug, kiss and somewhere in the mix, my 6 year old sister squeezes herself between them, much like my brother and I did. The site of it makes you want to cry and maybe throw up a bit. Its sweet...so sweet in fact that it gave me a reality check. What do I do when my husband walks through the door? I don't run, that is for sure. I am usually covered in babies or smashed avocado. Chessie, our dog, is the only one that greets him. Poor guy.

Recently, we have instituted "date night". Wednesday nights are just for us. The boys are in bed by 6:30pm. We make a nice dinner, dessert and usually watch a movie. We don't answer the phone or get on the computer. Its so nice to have that time to ourselves.

I have been whooping it up when he walks in the door. We missed him all day and he ought to know it. But, there is more we can do, I know there is.

I know a few people who read this blog have darling husbands who work hard. Can you share any good tips on keeping it spicy? Even things your husband does for you?

Skin Deep...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 21:03:00 +0000

Photo Credit: Rod Monkey

I know that skin can go one of two ways during pregnancy. You can get the "oh my, you are glowing" look or the "oh my, you are hitting puberty for the 2nd time" look. I envy those that fall into the 1st category although I wonder if the "glow" is actually an exhaustive sweat from carrying around another human being on your front. If you had "the glow", fill me in.

When you get pregnant, there are a lot of things that they take away from you. Heavy duty skin care chemicals is a big one. I found a great website that rates skin care products on their purity. There are so many companies that claim to be "organic", "natural" or "safe for babies" but are chock full of nastiness. If I am going to spend a bazillion dollars on "organic", it really needs to be "organic". The EWG (Environmental Working Group) does a ton of research into chemicals we use on a daily basis, how they effect the planet, our own bodies and our children's health. They work on donations and, in my humble opinion, do a great job. I am on their mailing list and always appreciate the articles they circulate.

So...back to skin care. I use Kiss My Face Start Up Exfoliating Face Wash. Its so refreshing and clean and I love the citrus smell. The link is to Vitacost.com which my mom discovered a while ago. Their prices cannot be beat and shipping is only $5. I buy diapers, Tylenol, everything there. I also found this Anti-Bacterial Complexion Mitt at our local grocer and I love it. Its made out of bamboo and has natural anti-bacterial properties so you don't have to worry about an icky sponge or loofah. It fits over any bottle to dry and makes my skin feel awesome. It comes in a bunch of different variations which I might try later.

Someday, when that stubborn Genie finally comes out of his lamp to grant me my wishes...I will have perfect skin (just kidding, of course if he does come out, I would wish for something like world peace, the elimination of hate and calorie-free brownies). My sister (6 years old so she has yet to fully appreciated it) has that perfect Guatemalan skin, all even and a beautifully warm carmel color. Ahhh, how I envy it. I bet she will still have perfect skin at 50.

If anyone else has any good skin care tips, please share. I know the big one is sun block. Any others?

Ralph, you are a genius...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 16:53:00 +0000

I have some good news and some bad news.

Good news: I found the perfect bathing suit for the newly (or not-so-newly) postpartum mom.

Bad news: I bought it on sale and now its...unavailable!!

However, I am hoping this "style" catches on and other designers follow suit (hehe).

So, getting on with it:

Out here in the Northwest, summer has still not officially begun. It's still in the upper 60's, a little overcast at times. As the sun makes up his mind about when he would like to make his final and permanent appearance, I have been shopping for a suit.

It's always a gamble, ordering something so fitted from an online retailer. Plus, they have the suit modeled on a 6'0, 135 lb, spray-tanned goddess...who wouldn't be swayed? You gingerly type in your credit card information, send off a mortgage payment and wait on pins and needles for that glorious Macy's package to arrive. No doubt, it will be delayed 8 times due to flooding, fire or some sort of pre-historic beast that broke into the FEDEX truck and ate the driver. Anyway, it finally shows up. You rip it open and immediately start with the accusations. Just as you thought, you try it on and you are still 5'6" and 1#$ pounds. Wait...I payed an arm and a leg for a suit and I still look like me!

Crap.

Stuff it back in the bag, drive it over to Macy's, demand a refund and claim the suit is "too big". Ha! Right.

So, maybe this isn't a familiar story to you but I just lived it multiple times over the past 3 months. Every time I pull another suit out of the bag, my husband says, "Really? How many is that now?" I think...6, to be exact.

But, this last time...I struck gold. Bikini's were struck off the list months ago. That only left Tankini's or a one-piece. I don't want to LOOK like I am trying to hide something. But, I want to hide something. I, personally, am proud of the few stretch marks I earned from the two gorgeous fellows snoozing in the next room. But, I know no one else feels that way.

I have poured over countless websites. The tankini's never seem to come down long enough and the one pieces always seem so...conservative?

Then, Ralph....as in Ralph Lauren...came to my rescue. He has designed this hybrid suit. A mix between Tankini and One-piece.

It looks like two pieces (even in person) but its actually one. The halter top & v-neck give it a little sex appeal but it has great support and coverage. Nothing is going to fall out, pull up or untie. And I may not look quite like her in the suit but I feel close to it.

Here are some other versions of the same style:

The Tommy Bahama "Midnight Pearl"- $89.00

Lauren by Raph Lauren One Piece- $62.90

I hope everyone is surviving the constant buzzing sound. My house sounds like it's filled with bees. My husband was leaving for work this morning and asked if I wanted him to turn off the television, he had been watching the current World Cup game. Ummm....yes PLEASE!! The buzzing is going to drive me mad. He doesn't even hear it anymore! I do love watching the games...on mute.

Input/Output

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 20:51:00 +0000

Photo Credit: Powerhouse Museum Collection

I think back on those few days in the hospital right after the boys were born...ahhh...bliss. Well, as blissful as it can be recovering from major abdominal surgery and coming to terms with the fact that you came in as one person and just split into three.

But, we had help.

Glorious help, 24 hours a day, real professionals who KNEW what they were doing! They came in all shapes, sizes and colors and man oh man, every single one of them had angel wings.

But, it doesn't last forever and soon they scooted us out the door with a stack of pampers, a sample of every singe baby item you can imagine, two beautiful but unbelievably fragile newborns and a husband with stars in his eyes. I felt so bad for him, he had no idea what was coming. I couldn't even fully grasp the reality of the next 6 months.

Somewhere in between oh-my-gosh-I'm-so-in-love and oh-my-gosh-what-the-hell-did-we-do...we settled into a routine and it went something like this:

Sleep, nurse, poop, change diaper, sleep, nurse, poop, change diaper...on and on.

And let me clarify...the sleeping, eating and pooping, that was the babies. No one else had the time!

So, this next review is for the eating and the pooping. Both are time consuming with twins but after a couple weeks, it becomes automatic.

I nursed and supplemented, used cloth and disposable so I have a broad range.

Nursing is hard for many people. Some things that really helped me were a great lactation consultant, my mom, good nursing tops, a few "nipple" products.

I bought 2 of the Bravado Nursing tanks and loved them. After the initial sticker shock wore off, I read a bunch of reviews and tried one out. They are long, they are really well made, they hold up to multiple washings and they have a great "opening" that is not frustrating while trying to nurse 2 babies at the same time.

My next lifesaver was Lansinoh Breast Cream. I can't say much more about it other than it will make a world of difference! I never had a problem with cracking or bleeding.

I don't know where I read about these but I used them from day 1. Soothies Gel pads by Lansinoh were such a relief. They are little gel pads you lay over the breast cream. You store them in the fridge and the cool relief is awesome. I have only ever been able to find them at Walgreen's or, of course, Amazon.

Bottle feeding, which I am still doing now, is sometime the only option but man, there are so many to choose from. I am a fan of glass baby bottles. I know some people think that is crazy but I have been using them the whole time and have never broken a single bottle. I tried plain glass in the beginning. I just bought the munchkins bottles from Target. Them, one of my boys was having major spit ups. No reflux or any pain...he would just burp and it would all come back up. A friend (thanks Julie!!) convinced me to try Dr. Brown's bottles. I was worried about all the extra parts but it was worth it. They are not cheap but I am so glad we tried them. I still use them and love them.

I hate buying baby gadgets. Wipe warmers, towel warmers, crazy garbage cans...yikes. But, I was given a bottle warmer and I realized that is a must-have. Especially in the middle of the night when you have no idea what you are doing or why you are awake. I was given the Avent model and it works great.

And lastly, diapers...I have tried them ALL. I have two very differently sized boys. One is slim and a light wetter, the other is about 3 pound bigger and a heavy wetter. During the day, I use cloth diapers, Bumgenius 3.0. Cloth diapering is a topic for a whole other post which I would be happy to do if there is any interest. Otherwise, I will talk about disposable. I use them at night and when we travel. I have tried Pampers, Huggies, Babies R' Us brand, Seventh Generation and Earth's Best.

I will honestly tell you that my kids wet out of both Pampers and Huggies. They get so saggy right away so it doesn't even matter if they are thinner to begin with. Plus, they always have all those annoying disney characters. My kids don't know what they are. I feel like they are just mocking me...WE ARE DISTRACTING YOU FROM THE FACT YOU ARE SPENDING HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS ON SOMETHING YOU WILL POOP IN.

Next, I tried the Babies R' Us Supreme brand. I used them once and took them back. They just plain sucked. They were hard and crunchy and leaked, the trifecta!

Last, I gave the earth-friendly and a bit more expensive brands a try. I liked them both. Earth's Best are white, but they are a bit stiff. The Seventh Generation are a more natural color and much softer. Both brands are thicker than the Pampers/Huggies but since I am used to cloth, it doesn't bother me at all. The Seventh Generation (which I use exclusively) NEVER leak and they have recently brought down their prices. Diapers.com has the best prices I have found anywhere. I love Seventh Generation, the research their company does and their mission.

If anyone has anything to add, please comment.

Baby Talk...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 01:20:00 +0000

Now that I have the necessary "support", I have picked up a few new wardrobe pieces and I am finally fitting back into my pre-pregnancy 7's, I am going to take a quick break from the "fashion" talk and bring up a new topic.

Photo Credit: bobhouser

I have a few "new Mommy" friends and I could not be happier for them. Anyone who has done it before knows how hard it is to pinpoint exactly what they need for pregnancy and baby. Goodness, walk into a Babies R' Us and you will feel sick to your stomach. I am a very practical person. I HATE buying things I don't need. I hate wasting money and with twins, what you buy has to be the most useful, streamlined option. So, I am going to do a short series on the baby items I love and have loved the most.

I will start off with some pregnancy items. Remember, this are my recommendations from carrying twins. Plus, everyone is different.

Target and Old Navy have some great maternity options. Buying clothes I was only going to wear for a few months was hard for me. I had a pair of nice jeans, 2-3 nice tops and the rest...well, you know what I was wearing the rest of the time :).

I bought a Bella Band in a small boutique in Virginia Beach and it is, hands down, the best maternity piece I own. I also bought a generic one from Target and it's not nearly as nice and a waste of money. I bought the Bella Band in white and black and I wish I still had an excuse to wear them!

Don't even try to tell me this is not the sexiest thing you have ever seen. It may look like some crazy elderly bondage mechanism but I assure you, its completely G-rated and saved my life. That contraption helps immensely with back pain and stretch marks. I was coaching girls Lacrosse until pretty close to the end and this made it possible. Of course, one look at me in that thing and my husband was, literally, rolling on the floor. But, it was all in the name of a healthy pregnancy so I wore it proudly.

If anyone else has anything they loved in their pregnancy, please share.

Need a lift?

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 08 Jun 2010 19:52:00 +0000

**Updated below...

If you just tugged at your bra straps, you know where I am going with this.

I really never thought it would happen to me. I have always been careful to wear the necessary "support". I was warned, thoroughly and yet, here I sit...wondering what happened.

Strike that, I know exactly what happened. July 20, 2009, two little milk monsters latched on and didn't let go. I am in total agreement that breast-feeding is a WONDERFUL thing. I wish I could have held on longer than 6th months. But, with twins, it was a daily hourly challenge. Its not always easy or possible but I know for me, it was totally worth it. It just cost me one tiny thing. I don't know if its possible to escape it but once you nurse, it seems like the girls just loose a little of their "umpf".

[I would like to enter this small disclaimer...when you write a blog, its very easy to forget you are writing to the world. I am fully aware that there are only about 6 people that actually read this, half being family, no doubt, but it is certainly available to all. I am going to be completely embarrassed the minute I push "Publish Post". But hey, it has to be talked about, doesn't it?]

SO, what's a girl to do? I am certainly not in need of any crazy surgical procedure. I just need something that supports me like this:

Photo Credit: Bagatell

But makes me feel like this:

Photo Credit: Hotness100

My goal was to get to Nordstrom's for a professional fitting and recommendation. However, for me, it takes about 30 minutes of driving and a ferry boat to get me to a respectable mall (yup, an actual ferry boat, with a bow and a stern- the whole nine yards). So, I settle for Victoria's Secret at the local mall and hope for the best.

I was pleasantly surprised! Although I was older than EVERYONE working there, the "bra fitting specialist" gave me an accurate assesment and had me out of the store within 15 min, no joke. She listened to my requirements (full coverage, no padding, lined and comfortable) and handed me this bra:

Body By Victoria- $42

I L-O-V-E this bra. It fits perfectly, gives great support and looks great under the oh-so unforgiving plain-white-T. I highly recommend it. It comes in a gazillion fun colors. Plus, their semi-Annual sale is on now and they are discounted! And no, its not super sexy...but while you are in buying something practical, you can buy something fun, too!

**I can't believe I forgot this part!!

So, while in the VS store my friend shopping for a different kind of bra. The sales associate pulls out what she wants as I am browsing through all the fun colors. But wait, something looks weird. What IS that? Oh...my....GOSH. Fake Nipples? Can that be right?

Some time ago my husband and I were watching reruns of "Friends" and he made a remark how Jennifer Anniston always seemed to be "cold". My response was something close to "those things can't be real, no one is that cold all the time!". He did not believe that someone would fake that.

Well, dear husband, here is your proof.

Honest to goodness, this bra has fake nipples. Rows and rows of bras that claim to conceal any proof of temperature change and here is one that encourages it!

My 1st question: why buys this bra?

My 2nd question: who is the design genius that thought it up?

Last question: how do you market something like this?

I did some research and there seems to be no sign of it on the actual Victoria's Secret website. If you want one, you will have to brave the public eye and fish one out yourself. Good luck and please, let me know how it goes.

Lost...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 15:32:00 +0000

Photo Credit: Okinawa Soba (In Asia and Africa until August)

I wish I could blame my lack of recent posts on something incredible. I
was on a week long African Safari, hunting wild boar. I was hiking Mt. Rainier with my most favorite sherpa. In actuality, we were traveling and I just emerged out from under the mountains of laundry that inevitably accompany any vacation. Its been one of those weeks, we all have 'em. I finally come up for oxygen only to realize just how much time has passed. My email box is over-flowing and spring has turned to summer. Plus, I swear, when I but my kids to bed, they were babies...but seemingly overnight, they turned into boys. How does this happen? In any case, there is a lot to catch up on!

1st of all, I have a correction to make. In this post, I talked about a great Gap shirt I bought, the Confetti T. Out of the package, it was cute and fun. After my children got a peek at the "confetti" part, it was all down hill from there. After wearing it for 15min, my husband started complaining of weird snow flakes all over the house. It was promptly returned. The Gap associate admitted many other Confetti T's have met the same demise. Oh well!

2nd, in this post, I put some swim suits up for review. I succumbed to my "thrifty" side and ordered the Mix & Match Ruffled Tankini. They had it on sale for $20! It came in the mail the other day. I was pleasantly surprised at the quality of the bathing suit. I am picky, I like well-sewn pieces with durable fabric. It was lined and seemed like it would stand the test of time, chlorine and sun. However, I ordered a size too big and was not too excited about the "ruffle" part. So, sadly, I returned it. I had a recommendation to try the Land's End suits (thanks Nina!). I have to admit, I am a fan of the Land's End Home section but their clothes always seemed a bit mature for me at the moment. But, I found some cute options and am awaiting their arrival. I will post about them when they come!

Lastly, I have a love affair with REI. Yes, this is probably a requirement when moving to the Northwest. We shamelessly sport socks with crocs, cargo pants that zip off into shorts and a wide array of "earth tones". But hey, we also use recyclable shopping bags, cloth diapers and we walk instead of drive. Anyway, back to REI. They have the cutest things for kids. I cringe at the thought of chasing my kids down every 2 hours to reapply sunblock this summer. After looking through countless retail sites and kids stores, I finally found the perfect rash-guard. They fit nice and tight and are so stinkin' cute. Plus, they come in 2 coordinating colors!

REI Long Sleeved Rashguard- $24.50

Stay tuned, I am working on perfecting my next "fashion" post. Its a tricky one!

Oh, Summer...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Mon, 17 May 2010 15:59:00 +0000

There are so many wonderful things about summer, especially out here in the Northwest. After suffering through a long chilly damp winter, the sun starts to break through and the flowers begin to bloom. Yes, those of you on the east coast have been enjoying the warmth for some time now. But, as the calendar eeks closer and closer to the month of June, we break out from underneath the fleece and Gortex...short sleeves are in sight!

But, on the other hand, summer brings some fear as well. I was outside yesterday, letting the boys play in the grass and decided to pull up my pant legs to catch some Vit. D. I think my 10-month old babies literally gasped. Yes, its been a while since Mommy's skin has seen the sun. Yes, I am so pale, you can almost see through me. And yes, the only thing that might help me now is a trip to the sun. But, skin cancer and wrinkles are two things I do not need to my list of woes. So, we stroll down to Rite-Aid and purchase an economy sized tan-in-a-bottle. So far, so good.

Maybe not.

The next big huge scary summer issue: swimwear. If I may be so brave to admit this on the internet...I am not ready for bikini season. Lord knows, I might never have been but now...my confidence is even a bit lower and that cute Tommy Hilfiger two-piece is now mocking me from the bottom of my closet (that is where I threw it after trying it on and promptly whipping it off). I am actually proud of the few stretch marks I have...they feel like battle scars. I grew two babies and kept them happy and healthy for 36 weeks. They came out 6+ lbs and 4+ lbs. BUT...I don't know that the rest of the world is as excited. So, I will cover them for now. At least until I re-gain the 6-pack that I never had in the first place!

So, how do you find a swim suit that covers you without looking like you are trying to be covered? Perhaps the ever popular Tankini? Thank goodness for that. But, as there were with my clothing, a bathing suit (even a tankini) comes with pretty stringent perimeters. Lets face it, if there is going to be a wardrobe malfunction in a swim suit, it's going to be one that you can't recover from. So, I need something scoopneck, halter and something that covers the tummy. Here are some options I am choosing from.

My budget will self destruct in 5...4...3...2...

Athleta- Asana Floral Splice Tankini

J.Crew- Solid micro ruffles tank top

Old Navy- Women's Mix & Match Ruffled Tankini

Any votes?

Fuzzy Wuzzy...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 11 May 2010 18:59:00 +0000

I thought it would be years until the topic of hair loss became a source of conversation. Not in my wildest dreams did I think I would be the one affected. Ahhh...the things the OB forgets to mention.

Yes, my babies have given me an amazing amount of joy.

Yes, my babies have given me more love than I could ever imagine.

And yes, my babies have given me the opportunity to grow in more ways than I thought possible.

But, my babies stole my hair. Well, most of it, anyway.

You may know what I mean. I did not loose a single golden strand throughout my pregnancy. It was healthy and thick (for the 1st time in my life) and I loved it. Then the babies came out and it all went to...well, you know.

It came out in CLUMPS. My pillow was covered, the shower drain was clogged and the lint trap was screaming for air. I was shedding more than my Labrador Retriever and that, my friends, is cause for panic.

I was just about to order a bottle of Rogaine for women when it stopped falling out just as quickly as it started. I thought the worst was over.

I was wrong.

Re-growth.

Have you heard the poem (I use that word loosely): “Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear”? That about sums it up.

You can spot the kid a mile away who has recently discovered scissors. Her poor mother is so embarrassed but there is not much you can do to hide 3/4 inch long bangs. Don’t worry mom, we have all been there, either as the experimenter or as the one who has to walk next to her and call her ours. We know its not your doing and when we pass your you in the isle, we smile, we don’t judge.

Anyway, I digress.

Due to this humiliating, albeit inevitable, hair germination, it looks as though I have made a sad attempt at bangs...with my eyes closed..left handed...while sleep-walking. I know its all part of the process and in a while, it will grow in but with all the other vanity issues we new mothers deal with...my halo of new baby hair is one I could live without.

In an attempt to distract from the fuzz, I visited my favorite hair dresser (Rebekah at Phoenix Rising on Bainbridge Island, WA) for a mini hair makeover. Just like I found out with the pedicure, its amazing what 2 hours of me-time (and an entire tube of aluminum foil) can do for you!

A few new tops, lighter locks...I am well on my way. Anyone else do anything nice for themselves lately?

Mother's Day

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Thu, 06 May 2010 17:07:00 +0000

Photo Credit: Niall Crotty
I love that there is a day to honor Mothers, especially now that I am one. Not for selfish reasons but just because I now get it. I remember moments as a child questioning my mother's rules or consequences. She would always explain it was because she loved me and she had been given the awesome responsibility of keeping me safe and healthy. It always ended with "one day you will understand". What she meant was that one day, I would understand how powerful, wonderful and consuming a mother's love can be.

Everyone says that the day you have a baby, your life changes. For me, the life change happened the day we decided to start trying. I couldn't think about much else. Motherhood gripped me at that moment and never let go. Now I sit here with my two boys napping in the other room. I can hear their sweet little breath on the monitor and it brings tears to my eyes. I understand why people do crazy things for their children. I would.

I will admit, when they wheeled me into the nursery after their birth, I was a bit overwhelmed. I didn't know who to pick up first. They both were just so beautiful, all pink, soft and fragile. But, sometime in the next few days, memories of my life before them vanished. The pain of carrying them, the surgery, everything was gone. All I could think about now was their well-being. And as we all know, it never ends.

Motherhood comes in so many different forms and they all deserve to be celebrated, those whose children are grown and gone, those who are mothering their kids every day, those whose children are now in heaven, long before their time, those who are carrying their 1st in their belly right now or waiting to adopt and bring their child home and those fighting to get pregnant. We all have that love for our children, whether they are present yet or not. We dream about them, cry for them, hope for them.

If you are a mom, in any form, Happy Mother's Day Weekend! It's a wonderful but exhausting job. You deserve a parade, a glass of wine and a bubble bath. Or, in the very least, a little help with your daily chores:

Photo Credit: kirainet

And one day, your kids will understand.

1st Purchase...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 04 May 2010 01:43:00 +0000

Since having babies, I have become a huge fan of anything that ends in .com. Diapers.com saved our lives during the 1st few months of newborns. Netflix.com affords us little "date nights" at home. Now, Gap.com gives me a little "me time" while the boys nap and I can search for something selfish.

I am an official Gap Card member and when they send that email through alerting me of an additional 15% off already on sale items, my heart skips a beat! So, instead of how I usually spend my time at the Gap (shopping for t-shirts with monsters or dump trucks), I shopped for myself. In accordance with my new found "style", here is what I bought:

Floral applique V-neck T- $17.99

Confetti T - $12.99

Silky Scoopneck T- $9.99

These tops are great. They fit true to size, the material has a great flow and can certainly be dressed-up with a few fun accessories. The Silky scoopneck even has a flattering seam running down the back to add a little detail. Plus, I stayed within my budget!

I caught a little flack from my last post. I know, I know, I can't wear ripped jeans anymore. As my husband would say "why would you spend that much money on something that looks like it came out of the garbage disposal?" So, I will stick with big-girl jeans but can I get some leverage on the tops? Is an embellished T too much? For the record, I am only 28...although, last night I bought some wine at the grocery store. As I handed it to the clerk, I grabbed my wallet and I think she thought I was taking out my driver's license. Out of complete pity (I saw it in her eyes), she asked for i.d. Lady, I appreciate the compassion but this middle aged homeless-lady look is only a front. When I have a minute to get showered, dressed and made-up, I usually grocery shop like this:

Photo Credit: Cafe Hangout

What? I swear! My husband bought me that hat for Christmas! Its perfect in case I ever come upon Michael Phelps and he dares me to race him. I am nothing if not prepared!

Anyway, its a start. It might never evolve into leather-pant-shoes but its a step up from pajamas.

Here, Style, Style!

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 16:20:00 +0000

Now that I have moved past the denial phase, owned up to my addiction to sweats lack of style and completed my list of requirements...it is time for step 3: FIND some style. There are so many great style blogs out there. I get 1 bajillion catalogues in the mail each day. TJ Maxx has even coined its own cheesy term "maxxonista". Shouldn't be too hard to find what I am looking for but I do need to start with a niche. Just like watching my boys learn how to walk, I have to start with small steps. What is the next step up from lounge wear? A basic T, cute jeans. I can dress it up or down. Here some basics I am considering:

Banana Republic

J. Crew

Also, a friend of mine (thanks Ms. K!) turned me on to this great blog Fabulous Florida Mommy. I love the pieces she puts together. Everything is so clean, classic and easy, not over done. Its style without the hype.

Here are some ideas she has that I would love to adopt (although, I might just have to swap the wedge's for flats):

Basic by FFM featuring Old Navy jeans

Items in this set:
Women classic shirts Solid Kelly shirt, $54
Old Navy Weekend Jeans: Weathered Wash
Cynthia Vincent for Target® Gladiator Wedge Sandals - Black : Target, $30
Coach Official Site - COACH ERGO PEBBLED LEATHER HOBO
Large 18K Yellow Gold Hoop Earrings - Forzieri, $450

Stripes and Cognac by FFM featuring Old Navy jeans

Items in this set:
J.Crew Perfect-fit Stripe open crewneck tee - J.Crew, $30
Via Vittoria jacket
Old Navy Weekend Jeans: Weathered Wash
Cynthia Vincent for Target® Cognac Wedge Sandal - 7.5 : Target, $30
Women sweaters Cashmere boyfriend cardigan, $125

4.20.10 by FFM featuring J Crew

Items in this set:
Vintage bateau top #24484 - pale camel, $30
High-heel flare jeans in clean indigo wash, $98
KORK-EASE Women's Bette Buff on Suede Wedge Sandal - Free Overnight..., $110
Women sweaters Cashmere boyfriend cardigan, $125
Fashion Jewelry & Fine Jewelry - J.Crew, $55

So, here I go with a head full of ideas, a moderate budget and about 15 seconds a day of free time. I will be back on Monday with my 1st purchases! Wish me luck!

Pedi-CURE

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 17:04:00 +0000

Photo Credit: _kasia_

In the past and certainly pre-baby, I have never been much for pedicures. People touching my feet, clipping my toenails...it just seems like such an oddly intimate thing to do in a public setting. Plus, there is always the necessary prerequisite to the visit: shave the legs. Not so much a problem in the past but now? Ugh.

However, a little while ago, a good friend of mine, Ms. B, gave me a new found respect for the practice. Mr. C watched the boys and we took off on a mini (very mini) girls getaway, my 1st since having babies. It was glorious. Warm foot baths, massage, lotions and girl talk. I underestimated the power of a little "me-time". I came home refreshed and ready to tackle the continuing cloth diapers, avocado mash and bath time!

I know this sounds crazy but I took my own polish. My absolute favorite polish is by Zoya. They have removed all the yuckies (i.e. toluene, formaldehyde and DBP (dibutyl phthalate) out of nail polish and developed a formula that is safer and REALLY lasts. Plus, they have soooooo many colors to choose from! This is the kit I started with and then added colors from there.

In my experience, a pedicure with this polish lasts at least 2 weeks. Next time we go, I will have Ms. B use it because she is a long distance runner, she can really put it to the test.

I know a lot of you have little girls that are just dying to paint their nails, this is a great polish to let them use.

Also, Zoya is doing this great promotion right now in honor or Earth Day! Exchange your old colors for new ones!

Whole new set of rules...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 19:23:00 +0000

Photo Credit: austinv

One of the reasons new pieces have a hard time making the cut is because many just cannot stand up to my list of demands! We all have some basic rules when it comes to jeans, tops, even bras. It has to fit a certain way, accentuate this or keep that from spilling out. Now, I have babies hanging on me and my list has been amended.

My original criteria for clothing was based on my body type. I am medium height, medium build, nothing fancy. I like boot cut jeans, long tops and fun shoes. As of July 20th, the following requirements have been added:

1. No more dry-cleaning. Who has time to create extra errands? Any clothing on a mother of young children will meet the same unfortunate demise: stuffed into the laundry hamper covered in spit-up. If its lucky enough, we miss what was secretly wiped on our shoulder and throw it on again, only to have it pointed out in the middle of a crowded grocery store. Public, don't tell us its there, just ignore it and understand its a hazard of the job.

2. Kid-friendly. After you baby-proof your house, its time to baby-proof your wardrobe. We have all been there. You are talking to a stranger and the little darling you are holding grabs ahold of your top and whamo- you have a Janet Jackson-type wardrobe malfunction on your hands. Usually, one can quickly compensate with the free hand. In my case, with twins, there are no hands left. Its either drop a baby or pretend my bra and all its contents are not joining in on the conversation. If we pretend its not happening then there is certainly no need to take off running!

3. Forgiving. Now, before I elaborate, I must explain something. I have some mom-friends who do NOT need this category. 6 weeks after giving birth, they are ready for bikini season. To those hot-mamas, I salute you (and am oh-so jealous!). To those of us who need a bit more time, we need a wardrobe to match. I need tops that simultaneously give me some shape yet don't cling to every curve. I don't want to look like I am still sporting maternity wear but I need some forgiveness.

4. Adaptable. With multiple children, laundry and cooking, I don't have time for costume changes. I need pieces that can move from daytime errands to dinner with friends, throw on some accessories and be ready for date night with the hubs.

I think that about encompasses it all. I have already been given some great suggestions and am putting together some ideas as I type. Please feel free to comment below and share some secrets you may have for meeting these requirements.

Lets make a deal!

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Tue, 20 Apr 2010 16:17:00 +0000

Photo Credit: Flickr to Me

To understand why the following conversation makes my husband ill, you have to understand an agreement he and I made. I told him he could only buy a new t-shirt if he got rid of one of the many stacked (and stacked and stacked) in our closet. He only promised to agree if I conceded the same. I could only buy something if I gave something away...simple, right? (Note: My father has been in sales my whole life. He wouldn't buy me a pair of running shoes without conjuring up some sort of "deal". I know how to work it, its in my blood, poor guy never saw it comin'.)

Cut to current conversation:

Husband: What are you doing in here?
Wife: Cleaning out my closet and organizing my clothes into 2 piles: one to keep and one to give away.
Husband: It looks like you are keeping almost everything!
Wife: That is my give-away pile.

Still filtering through mountains of clothing. Its almost summer...I encourage you to do the same! Let me know if you find anything good!

BONUS: If you are brave enough, comment below with the most EMBARRASSING piece in your wardrobe. I'll tell if you tell :)

Excuses, Excuses

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 16:16:00 +0000

Photo Credit: Jamelah (flickr)

Style is such a fluid term. I had a little and then I lost it. Where did it go? The reasons why are quite obvious when you are toting around twin boys on a short 5’5” frame. I am certainly a “sturdy” girl but no matter what, that is a lot of belly and no amount of Pea in a Pod can help. So, my only affordable alternative was yoga pants and t-shirts.

That is where it all began, I blame it on the belly. After the belly came the all-nighters, the battle to nurse and the almighty fight to reclaim my pre-pregnancy body. All three things required a similar uniform as did the pregnant belly. Again, still blaming it on the belly. And now that the babies are sleeping all night, eating beef and carrots for dinner and I am starting to shed the baby weight (all right, that part is still a work in progress), the lycra and cotton still remain.

But, why change something that works? I don’t go into an office, ever. I don’t meet people out for lunch. I don’t even video chat with anyone other than my mom. Who cares what I wear? Well, probably no one.

But, the truth is, I care. I am married to a man who changes out of his sweatpants to go on an ice cream run. He showers sometimes twice a day. He gets a haircut a week before he needs to. The only thing more immaculate than his hygiene is his car…and that my friends, is one clean car! He loves me no matter what but when he married me 4+ years ago, I was in a $5k wedding dress, the least I can do now is put on a cute pair of jeans.

So, no more excuses. Here is my plan:

1st: I will go through my closet. I will pull out everything that fits at the moment and shove everything else in the back. Then, I will see what I have to work with.

2nd: I am going to pour over all the fabulous style blogs/sites for inspiration. Its been a while since I have cracked the pages of Vogue.

3rd: One day per week, I will visit the mall, Target or some fabulous online shop and search for an item $50 or less to add to my wardrobe.

See you next week!

On Your Mark...

noreply@blogger.com (Dana) — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 16:13:00 +0000

Photo Credit: Lightroom Presets (flickr)

I am new to these two things: motherhood and the act of “asking for help”. That fact may make this whole experience a bit rocky at first.

I became a mother to twin boys about 8 months ago. It rocked our world and forever changed how we act, what we say and how I dress.

I will admit, I am in need of help. desperately. I have never had much “style”. My years in school consisted of what was on sale at the Gap and various athletic uniforms. I had a few brief years of Ralph Lauren suits and Kenneth Cole Reaction footwear.

However, somewhere around my 6th month of pregnancy, I slipped into something more comfortable (and not in a sexy way) and have never recovered. You know the kind of mom who rocks the Victoria’s Secret runway in angel wings 6 weeks after she gave birth? I am not that kind of mom…not even close.

My aspirations are simply to get out of the yoga pants and into…well, something a little less comfortable. I am not here to give advice but to get it from other people who know what they are talking about.

Next post: my plan of action

…get set…GO.