A Merry Rose

2012-01-25T14:28:00.000-08:00

Selfless focus is one of my goals this year. I realize how complacent I've been in the past year or so. I've let physical ailments become an excuse for indulging self.

This passage from James about selfless wisdom means a lot to me:

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth.This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, twithout partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

Many years ago, a wise woman I knew taught this acronym: Jesus first, Others second, You last -- which makes for Joy. Over the years, I've noticed that women who truly practice this are the happiest!

Wishing you a fruitful, peaceful, and wise 2012!

Enjoy!

2012-01-20T14:51:00.000-08:00

Letters to New Moms -- 2

Dear young mother...

The book of Proverbs contains the lament of a man who did not listen to instruction when he was young and who came to ruin. (Proverbs 5:12-24)

Godly counsel is gold! It's even more so if the advice or correction comes packaged with a dose of comfort and support. Even if it's not delivered in the sweetest style, however, it's still precious, nonetheless. Young wives and mothers especially need the counsel of godly older women.

Choose your advisers wisely. Ask yourself if this person's advice is in line with scripture, if it leads you to greater faith, and if it leads you down the narrow path, rather than the broad one. Consider the outcome of your adviser's faith, as well as his or her success in the area in which they offer advice. Your advisers won't be perfect, but that's ok. You can learn much from someone who humbly walks with the Lord and who humbly admits his or her mistakes. If someone's really blown it in an area, but they have learned from their mistakes, they still have something to offer.

We live in an age when we have an abundance of information at our fingertips. This has its obvious benefits, but it also has a downside. You may find yourself overloaded with information -- even good information -- to the point of paralysis. Remember that, in the end, the Bible is the only writing that serves as an infallible, unshakable foundation for life.

Consider someone's particular advice, but take the responsibility for deciding in prayer whether to implement it or not. Do not let pride or selfishness hinder you from taking needed advice; if you do not implement advice, let it be for other reasons.

Do not compare your life to that of someone you really don't know, especially in the blog-o-sphere. Learn from blogs or books but do not hold the writings of people as an inflexible standard.

Strive for depth of knowledge as well as breadth of knowledge. In our day, it's easy to acquire breadth of knowledge. Most of us receive educations undreamed of by earlier generations. We also can learn a smattering about everything just by searching the net, not to mention coming home from the library with a stack of books. It's important to grasp breadth of knowledge, though. A few precepts, carefully considered and implemented deeply in your life will serve you better than a scatter shot of ideas. In areas where you want to do your best, learn one thing deeply before racing on to the next.

Evaluate your and your husband's priorities in life. Learn what is essential and what is nice, but nonessential. Perhaps, Mother A makes all of her baby food from scratch with ingredients grown on her many acres of land. Perhaps, she writes a blog advocating that all mothers follow this pattern, and she urges her in-real-life friends to do so, too. You can learn from her heart to provide the best she can for her family's table. Yet, her activities in this area may not fit with your family's essential priorities. You do not have to live on a farm or plant a huge garden and orchard to be a godly and effective wife and mother. While processed foods are not the healthiest, it's not the end of the world if you don't make all of your own baby food from scratch. So, take the seed of good and leave the peeling, as they say. That's only one example; in many things, there isn't a right or wrong to consider, but what is best for you and your family.
What is essential is that you bring your child up in the nurture and teaching of the Lord. Strive to grow in faith and character and to build faith and character in your child. As a family, seek the kingdom of God first. Let other things fall into their rightful places in your life.

Seek advice from people who know you and who can give you sound advice based on your situation and needs.

Imitate whatever you see of Christ in others.

Be inspired by women of faith and godly influence.

Neither be too proud to take input or correction, nor so weak-willed as to be swayed off course by every wind of teaching or opinion.

Hold tightly to God's word.

Enjoy!

2012-01-16T13:56:00.000-08:00

What's your Happy Home Style?

When it comes to making a happy home, do you love

Neutrals or whites in decorating, with only pops of color?

Or

Colors?

Music playing in the background?

Or

Quiet, plus some natural sounds, such as breezes through open windows or children playing or birds singing?

Lots of happy light?

Or

Peaceful, serene, shaded rooms?

If you love to play music while at home, do you love

something upbeat and modern

or

soft and classical?

Open floor plans?

or

Designated rooms that can be closed off?

Dainty china?

Or

Bold tableware?

Charming pretty nick-knacks?

or

clean, open surfaces?

Vintage?

or

Modern?

There are many possibilities for creating happy home surroundings! Many home choices are neither right nor wrong, but what works best for you and your family.

Enjoy!

2012-01-10T17:57:00.000-08:00

Letters to Young Wives and Mothers...

Letter One: Should you carpe diem? Yes, if you think of this wisely."

Young mother, this letter is inspired by a blog post I read entitled, "Don't carpe diem". It was written by a young woman who is mothering young children. If I understand her correctly, she is not encouraged when older mothers smile and give advice along the lines of "seize the day, for your children will grow quickly." She feels that older women expect her to be blissful every moment of every day and, naturally, she knows that she cannot live up to this impossible ideal.

Believe it or not, young mother, I, too, was young once. I once was a mother of young children. Older women said to me and to my peers, "Seize the day. The years when your children are at home will fly more quickly than you know." This did not irritate me or make me feel inadequate. Yet, no matter how much I agreed with the concept, I understood it only in theory. I still had to live my life day by day, to journey through life to the point where this concept became reality.

Now, I understand this experientially. This time is shorter than you can possibly realize. The stakes are high. You are helping to prepare young children for life and for eternity. And, not so very long from now, there will be a day when you do miss your young babies and toddlers and even your teens! Oh, you will be so proud of the adults they have become, and you will enjoy watching them establish homes of their own. You will still love every minute you get to spend with them. You will not spend your empty nest years longing for a time that can never come again, or, at least I pray that you will not.

Even so, when you see a mother with young children, you will be surprised how easily these words will slip from your lips: "Seize the day! The years are short. I enjoyed every minute of being a mother." Some young woman, whose child is throwing a tantrum as you speak, will look at you with puzzled eyes. "You don't mean that you enjoyed minutes like this?"

I am glad to know that some of your peers find words like these to be irritating, for I shall be careful how I speak them. Still, if I could meet my younger self, this is exactly the advice I would speak. "Spend your parenting on the things that matter for life and for eternity and don't fret about the problems so much. So, your child is throwing a tantrum in the store. It's an opportunity to teach and to bond. And, one day, you really will miss even this."

I don't expect you (or my younger self) to walk around like some super-mother who has no trials to face. I remember sleepless nights and long days when every little thing seemed to go wrong. I suffered with my children through colic and skinned knees and the ups and downs of friendships and first broken hearts and learning to obey and learning how to make wise decisions. How else do you think I got these wrinkles and these gray hairs? In the living of these years, however, I learned that sezing the day meant two things: 1) to hold on to joy and 2) to invest in eternity.

Joy does not deny problems, but meets them with faith, gratitude, and love. It is possible to rejoice and sorrow at the same time, as Paul said he did. Our example, Christ, endured the cross for the joy set before Him, as Hebrews informs us. That joy was the joy of knowing that He pleased his Father and that he was pouring out his blood for our salvation. Following Jesus in any arena of life means that we take up our own crosses and follow him daily. (Luke 14). Motherhood is one tool God uses to help us die to selfishness and grow in sacrificial, Christ-like love.

On some occasions, it takes us a moment to tap into joy. The woman who wakes up with morning sickness, only to find that her older toddler is fretful from teething and the cat has thrown up on the carpet and the washer has stopped mid-cycle, may not feel like rejoicing. The trials of life, whether they are small or large, must be reckoned with. We do need to process feelings of fear, inadequacy, grief, and irritation. But, how do we process these feelings? By going to the Lord and casting our burdens on Him. The goal isn't to be blissful every moment of every day, but to trust that the trials of life are working a more Christlike character in us and in our children. Sometimes, our path to joy involves getting the help of others who have endured similar trials. If life hurts, young mother, say so. An older mother should understand.

Joy knows that life lived with respect for the Father is well lived and has meaning. What you do as a mother has great meaning, even if motherhood is made up of many daily, ordinary-seeming moments. Perhaps, this is the most important thing we older women mean when we says, "Enjoy these days." We are older warriors who appreciate the valor of our younger counterparts.

Joy also takes note of the many, many reasons to be grateful. Joy treasures up the many happy moments and the wondrous moments and the awe-filling moments.

To seize the day because the time is short can be viewed in two ways: with a sense of worry and pressure or with a sense of faith and peace. The woman who seizes the day well understands that the time is short, but she does not fret because of this. She follows Jesus' advice: "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow has enough troubles of its own." Matthew 6:33. Likewise, she heeds his admoition to place her treasure in heaven, where it cannot be destroyed by time.

God has set eternity in the hearts of man, according to Ecclesaistes. Perhaps, that is why we are not satisfied to merely exist, but yearn to spend our time on things that matter. Perhaps, that is why the passing of time brings some pangs. This is true for the mother of children, but it is also true for every person on the planet. Our days may be busy and full, and the time may either seem to fly or to drag. There are moments, however, when eternity breaks in and we ponder whether our priorities are on track or not. No matter what we set our hand to, the time flies by more quickly than we think it will.

In light of eternity, it makes some sense to evaluate how breif our earthly existence is.

"So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom." Psalm 90:12

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men." Colossians 3:23

Seize the day!

2012-01-07T09:38:00.000-08:00

January Cleaning!

I don't know about you, but my house is worse for the wear after the holidays. January always feels like the time to me to dig in and get things in order, not that I'm a great example of always having an orderly house.

In our area (Tennessee), we do not have hard winters, but whatever wintry weather we have usually happens between January and March. I can't say for certain that we won't have some snow this year. But, we do not have the unbroken days upon weeks of snow, salted roads and dripping snow boots, as some areas of the U. S. do. Our coldest days are usually followed by mild spells that make one thing of spring.

And, what glorious, but brief springs we have! When those few weeks of mild weather arrive, sandwiched as they are between our winters and our long, long summers, it's a delight to be outside or going places rather than doing heavy cleaning. I'd rather have the intense stuff behind me. So, getting a jump on cleaning now makes sense for our area -- or, at least for me.

Spring cleanings and fall cleanings evolved in the days when houses became very dusty and grimy from winter heating methods. People did not have central air, with its circulating currents, and even the best of house keepers had to fight winter stuffiness. Periodic deep cleanings were essential in the cities, but also evolved along with the rhythms of farm life, as a greater percentage of homes were in rural areas.

Around our part of the South, women also used to keep grass cloth mats to spread upon their regular carpets during rainy spells, such as occur most frequently in the spring and the fall. This was a must in the days when gentlemen tracked the outdoors in on their boots.

In many parts of the U.S., people changed (and still change) curtains and bedding with the seasons. Other than throwing on or taking off an extra layer of bedding, this is not as necessary where I live as it might be in other parts.

Of course, we have many large areas in the U.S. where the weather is unvarying the year round. I spent my early years in Florida, where our roses bloomed best at Christmas. House keeping in semi-tropical areas, arid areas, or Mediterranean type climates is slightly different than in areas with four distinct seasons.

With the advent of central air and other conveniences, many people have dispensed with seasonal cleaning altogether and prefer to work monthly and quarterly and annual chores into their regular cleaning schedule. Others still find its valuable to designate specific periods for deep cleaning.

The need to keep our personal and family shelter clean hasn't changed over time. However, the different circumstances of our lives mean that we can tweak our cleaning habits to suit our and our family's lifestyles. This require thinking through our family's needs, rather than doing what our mothers and grandmothers did simply because they did it. On the other hand, understanding how they cleaned and why can help us adapt their wisdom about keeping a clean and orderly home to our practices today.

What about you? In what type of climate do you live? How do you handle non-routine cleaning chores? Do you set aside periods of deep cleaning? Or, do you work extra tasks into a weekly routine? What accommodations do you make in your house cleaning for the types of weather you normally have?

Enjoy!

2012-01-02T08:25:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!!
Here's to another trip around the sun...
Love, Joy, and Peace
Blessings and Hope
Walking with Christ
Fresh start, fresh life, fresh home
Goals and Progress
Resting and Refreshing
Work and Stillness
Goodness Abounding
Steps in the Journey
On our Way Home
God's mercies are new every morning!

2011-12-10T09:03:00.000-08:00

Have you seen these 86 fresh Christmas decorating ideas from Southern Living Magazine? Of course, as is always the case with Southern Living, the accompanying photos are lovely.

In the photo above is an idea that I'm thinking about trying. I have some random silver pieces from my family and my husband's family. I actually have trouble storing them. I'm thinking of copying the idea not just for Christmas, but for a while. The problem is that I store many of these things in silver cloth and am also not the world's most frequent silver polisher. But, as of now, my silver's stored here and there, and I think it might pull my odds and ends together to display them as a collection. Of course, some of the things in this photo are mercury glass, which doesn't oxidize when exposed to air as silver does.

What do you think? Yay or nay?

2011-11-01T09:34:00.000-07:00

The Narrow Path...

While my husband was working in California and I was tagging along, I spent some hours wandering down a a public trail that wound around a lagoon. This trail and wildlife preserve were not too far from a busy public thoroughfare. Once in a while, I could see glimpses of the traffic in the distance. Yet, the preserve was peaceful, secluded, and quiet. I met just enough walkers and joggers along the way to feel quite safe, and, yet, I had enough solitude in which to rest and think. I also enjoyed watching the birds, butterflies, bees, and occasional lizard who lived in the brush.

The juxtaposition of the footpath with the highway in the distance reminded me of this challenging verse from Matthew 7:

Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

Why do only a few find the narrow road? I don't think that the Lord wants it that way. After all, Paul tells us in I Timothy 2:1-3 that God wants all men to be saved. In Ezekiel, God tells us that He takes no pleasure in the death of any man. He sent first the prophets and, then, Jesus, to guide us. He promises that if we are in Him, he will guide our steps. (Proverbs 5:3) But, our foolish hearts are prone to wander, as the song says. The road to life leads through the cross, and we struggle with the fact that if we want to come after Jesus, we must first take up our cross daily. (Luke 14). It's a daily choice.

And, so, I'm reminded of how easily I can settle for having the appearance of godliness without its power, and I'm so thankful for grace, which pulls my feet back to the way.

Enjoy!

2011-10-26T10:50:00.000-07:00

Likewise, the brand of sunscreen my dermatologist recommends for me.

What is your sun risk Factor?

Do you know your sun exposure risk factor, based on your skin type? The American Academy of Dermatology divides skin tones into six types. Each skin type is beautiful, but each carries with it its own particular risk factor for damage/cancer due to sun exposure.

The skin types are as follows:

Type I – Extremely High Risk

People with skin type I do not tan whatsoever. They burn easily. Their skin is extremely sensitive to the sun. They have very fair white skin, and usually have light (blond or red) hair and light eyes, as well.

Skin Type II – Very High Risk

People with skin type II skin burn easily, but they can, with great difficulty, achieve a very light tan after repeated sun exposure. Their skin is highly sensitive to the sun. Like Type I, they have fair skin and eyes and hair that are on the lighter, rather than darker, side.

Skin Type III – High Risk

People with skin type III sometimes burn, but normally tan to a light, all-over brown when in the sun. Their skin is sensitive to the sun. They may have white to olive skin tones. This group is the largest skin risk factor group in the U. S.

Did you know that there is no safe way to tan?

Skin Type IV – Moderate Risk

People with skin type IV will quickly tan to a moderate brown. They may sunburn, but minimally. They may have olive to light brown skin.

Skin Type V – Low Risk

People with skin type V will find that they seldom get a sunburn and that they tan easily and deeply in the sun. They may have light to fairly dark brown skin.

Skin Type VI – Minimal Risk

People with skin type VI have deep skin tones. In the sun, they hardly ever burn, if ever. People in this category generally have dark black or very dark brown skin.

Types IV, V, and especially VI (lucky you!) generally show aging of the skin later than Types I, II, and III. There are skin cancers in these lower risk groups, but the frequency of occurrence is lower than for the higher risk groups. Even though your risk of skin damage and skin cancer is lower, it is still an important risk, nonetheless. The American Academy of Dermatologist recommends that everyone, even those with skin that seems impervious to the sun, wear a sunscreen with a SPF of 30. We all need to protect our skins, for skin is the largest organ in our bodies and is essential to our health and well-being.

I think I'm risk factor Type II. I think my husband is Type III, maybe IV, and my children are Type I and Type II. Which type are you? How about your spouse? Children? If you'd like to know more, ask your physician.

Enjoy!

2011-10-25T13:32:00.000-07:00

Children, Wear your sunscreen...Did you hear me?

Every one of my children's four grandparents have had at least one incidence of skin cancer. Now, I have a few pre-cancers, as well as some benign, but not-so-fun sun damage on my skin. It pays to wear your sun block, I tell my children.

According to Women's Health Magazine, "UV radiation alters the actual DNA of your skin cells, causing lines, wrinkles, discoloration, and even cancer."

Of course, the sun is a God-given source of physical life and happiness for our planet. Unless we shun the day and only come out at night, we can hardly avoid the sun, nor would we want to! However, we can take precautions to keep the sun from damaging our skins.

In order to take wise precautions, we need to be aware of AMA, FDA, and dermatologist guidelines. Unless we are aware of current recommendations, we are likely to make some sunblock mistakes. For example, we might use too little (It takes a full ounce of sunscreen to protect a person wearing a swimsuit for the allotted time on the sunscreen bottle. That means an eight ounce bottle of sunscreen contains only approximately 8 applications of sunscreen for someone who is swimming or at the beach.) Likewise, we may fail to buy a broad spectrum sunscreen, which blocks both UVA and UVB radiation. (Sun blocks will soon be required to block both, but do not currently have to. Look for a sun block that does cover both types of radiation.) Or, we might put too much hope in a jar. A sunscreen cannot block all the sun's rays, and it is possible to get a burn or damage your skin by lingering too long in the sun, even while wearing sun block.

Here's an article by the University of San Francisco California School of Medicine which gives you all the information you need to purchase an effective sun block and to use it correctly.

Note: Some think that using sun block not only prevents future sun damage to the skin, but it may reverse sun damage you have already received, as well. Perhaps, this is because skin that is protected from immediate sun damage can turn its resources to healing past damage.

Enjoy!

2011-10-11T13:15:00.000-07:00

A heart from God...

This morning, my husband and I walked down to the beach. As we enjoyed the gorgeous surroundings, we also shared with each other things that we have been learning from God recently.

Just as we got to the water's edge, I glanced down and saw a heart shaped rock that the ocean had thrown back up onto the beach. I know that could have been purely coincidence. In the moment, however, it seemed like a gift from God, and I like to think that is what it was. Just a little further, I found another similarly shaped rock.

An acquaintance of ours shared that when he passes spiritual milestones or comes to a decision of repentance and growth in some area, he will write the date on a rock and keep it as a remembrance. I think I shall keep these rocks to commemorate this lovely time, as well as to remind me of some spiritual goals that I have.

My husband teased me by saying, "You don't want a heart of stone, do you?" That reminded me of the wonderful promises in the book of Ezekiel concerning our hearts. God promises to remove our hearts of stone and give us hearts of flesh, to give us undivided hearts, to give us a new spirit in our hearts, and to move us to keep his ways. I love God's promises and the fact that He is always faithful to his promises.

I also love spending time with my husband. Next month, we will celebrate our 31st anniversary! It's hard to believe how fast the years have flown. I love that my husband still seeks God with all of his heart, which is a quality which drew me to him in the first place. I also love that we can share with each other the things that the Lord is putting on our hearts.

2011-10-10T20:29:00.000-07:00

Did you grow up on Dr. Seuss, as I did? As a child, I loved it when my parents read his books to me, and I was especially delighted when my father used food coloring to concoct
for me "a dish if " Green Eggs and Ham".

Of course, I shared the books with my children when they were young. Recently, my son told me that, when he visited San Diego, he heard that Dr. Seuss had spent some time in Southern California and that many of his drawings were inspired by the local vegetation. Now, I am visiting Southern California, and I can see a resemblance between some of Dr. Seuss' characters and the many beautiful trees and plants around here.

This made me curious, so being the Internet nerd that I am, I turned to Wikipedia's article about Theodor Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss). While the biography does note that Dr. Seuss lived in LaJolla for several years, it seems to indicate that his style was influenced more by his original boyhood home and surroundings in the mid west. Certainly, his career was well established by the time he moved to California, though some of his famous books were written in LaJolla.

What do you think? Have you lived in California or visited here? Do you think the vegetation could have been inspiration for his drawing style? Have you ever heard this? An inquiring mind wants to know....

enjoy!

(

2011-09-19T17:20:00.000-07:00

It pays to be a classic...

Do you have classic or traditional tastes? If so, this may help you sail through tough economic times. How, you say?

People with classic or traditional tastes often decorate their homes by "shopping" in grandma's attic. Re-purposing some timeless antiques is a low-cost way to create a timeless and inviting look in a home.

Likewise, women with classic or traditional tastes (along with the funky, but vintage-style woman) have a knack for adding heirloom items to their wardrobe. Jewelry, evening bags, and scarves add spice to more modern pieces of clothing.

Since classic and traditional clothing stays in style longer and wears well due to good construction, women who purchase classics as their basic wardrobe pieces can stretch their wardrobes longer without buying much, if anything, new.

Enjoy!

2011-09-17T14:54:00.000-07:00

i30 days of smart money choices

We, like many families' would rather not pay $100 a month for cable TV. We use a Roku system. Little did we know that we are part of a significant trend. How about you? Have you investigated ways to save on your entertainment budget, especially with regard to TV?

Enjoy!

2011-09-02T20:08:00.000-07:00

30 Days of Smart Money Choices: The Casual Wardrobe

Do you have a closet full of clothes but nothing to wear? One reason might be that you have allocated too much of your wardrobe budget for items that you seldom wear, while you have spent too little on the things you actually wear day to day. Since our society is becoming progressively more casual, chances are a woman who has this problem with her closet may have neglected to buy enough well-made, long-lasting, and flattering casual garments.

The term "casual" covers a lot of ground. Items in the casual part of your wardrobe might include sports and outdoor clothing, clothes to run errands in, clothes you might wear at home, clothes you might wear when running a home business or managing your household, to items you might wear for casual social events. Casual items might include skirts, dresses, pants, tops, shoes, purses, etc.

The one thing casual shouldn't mean is shoddily made. Since we wear our casual clothing more often, it's wise to search for the best quality for the price. That doesn't mean our casual wear must necessarily expensive, but it should be durable, well-fitting, comfortable, and pleasingly presentable.

Casual clothing can express any fashion personality from boho to chic. Obviously, women who have sporty fashion sensibilities will lean toward casual items. (In fact, they may have too many casual items and not enough dressier ones.) Women who like preppy styles and women who have natural tastes will also adore casual items. Women who dress in classic style may also have a special flair for wearing casual clothing, though they will also have dressier items in their closets.

One way to wear casual clothing is to choose a number of basic pieces in neutral colors. These can be dressed up or down through your choice of shoes and accessories. Many women turn their favorite one or two neutrals into sort of an "everyday uniform", which they can pull together quickly and easily.

Enjoy!

2011-08-15T10:49:00.001-07:00

Thirty Days of Smart Money Choices:

A man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions. Luke 12:15

The Greatest Generation, as they are called, generally followed a strict corporate career structure. Beginning with their baby boomer children, each succeeding generation has become more flexible in job outlook. Millenials, for example, are often entrepreneurial in spirit and often start small businesses that are centered on jobs or skills they enjoy. Internet technology makes it possible to market such businesses. Many are choosing job and life satisfaction over prestige and paycheck.

Whatever generation someone belongs to, today's business culture makes it more likely that an individual will have at least two types of work during their lifetime. For example, the baby boomer who is downsized out of a job or who has retired may start a new venture during midlife and later -- provided that they are physically healthy enough to do so. Likewise, a woman may choose for her main career to be that of managing her home and family, yet she may also take on outside work in different seasons of life. The young entrepreneur who launches a small business may sell a successful one and move on to something else or, conversely, may not succeed and end up in a more traditional work role.

If you are at a career crossroads in life, you may be stuck as to what you want to do next. Here are a couple of ideas:

As baby boomers and Gen X-ers age, more health care resources are needed. If you do not wish to go back to school to become a doctor or a nurse, there are other opportunities in the field of medicine that you might consider. For example, you might become a paid health care advocate, who helps patients manage their own health care. Or, you might become a sitter for someone who is home bound. Health care provides volunteer opportunities, too.

If health care is not your thing, you might consider becoming a docent. If your town has a museum or a historical attraction, for example, you may find work giving tours. Similarly, libraries often need assistance.

In some places, any college degree will qualify you to become a substitute teacher. If you love children and are looking for "a career after a career", consider substituting.

If you are a manager of your home, consider that much of this world's good has been traditionally done by women at home whose children are grown. You might choose to forgo getting a job simply because your children are out of the house and people expect you to do something, anything. You are still needed in our home. Likewise, you are needed to fill roles that have traditionally been done by women of mid-life and beyond. You might, for example, unofficially mentor young wives and moms in your area, do volunteer and church work, get involved in service to your neighborhood or city, help out the elderly in your neighborhood, etc. The possibilities are endless.

In our era, we are not as limited in our choice of vocation or avocation as we once were. Before you settle for grinding a way at a job you no longer enjoy, investigate what other possibilities you can explore. Remember, though, that it is best not to quit your current job until you know for certain that you do have replacement income. Also remember that it is not always possible to do exactly what we want to do. Sometimes, we have to work at something we don't particularly enjoy in order to provide for our families, and, sometimes, we do have to stick with a career path that no longer suits us. A job that pays the bills is a blessing in this economy, whether it's a dream job or not.

Enjoy!
Elizabeth

2011-08-10T09:12:00.000-07:00

Art of Putting pen to paper

I've been thinking a lot about letter writing today. I set out to write a lovely letter to my lovely daughter, and I searched the Internet looking for lovely inspiration. Now that I type that, I see some irony in turning to the technology -- wonderful as it is -- for help in an art that has been largely diminished by that very technology. Yet, I did find some wonderful spark for creativity.

First, I found that there are many blogs devoted entirely to the art of letter writing. Here was one of the first that I came across: 365 Days of Letters.
Another inspiring site devoted to letter writing is this one: A Year of Letters. These two blogs connect to a number of blogs about writing letters, which I hope to explore in the coming days.

I also found research that says, believe it or not, that penmanship is good for your health and also essential to a child's development. After reading several articles on the subject, I became convinced that putting pen to paper can

1) help those of us who are on the back end of the baby boom to keep our minds sharp as we age.
2) help any of us remember, as we apparently remember something better if we write it down than if we don't.
3) help children develop the brain in an essential way that does not occur with texting or typing.
4) help children learn fine motor detail.
5) inspire confidence in us.
6) help us communicate better with people who live in areas that are not as technologically advanced as our society is -- an essential if you have a mission mindset or a philanthropic interest in a developing country.
7) Help us truly communicate feelings in a way that can not be communicated through email or texts.

Along with all the good news that attention is being paid to handwriting, I also found this beautiful ode to the passing art of writing letters. The author describes receiving beautiful letters from her mother-in-law, muses about the importance of letters, and wonders if the next generation will even write them.

I suppose that it's natural I should think about the art of writing letters, as I have found many beautiful family letters among stuff that I cleared out from a house that my father sold. I found letters that my father had written to his family when he was stationed abroad during World War II and the outcome of the war had not yet been decided. I found the letters that my parents exchanged when they were engaged, and my father moved ahead of my mother to the town where they would live once they were married.

I also kept the letters that my husband wrote to me during our courtship and engagement, along with every letter or card he has written to me during our thirty years of marriage. I have no plan to discontinue the practice of keeping writings from my beloved Doc Brilliant.

My friends and I used to delight in receiving sweet letters from our beaux and in keeping those letters in some special spot in our rooms to re-savor as we wished. What do girls do now that so much of their communication with their suitors is done through texts?

On the one hand, I think that letter writing continues in the tradition of buying cards and writing notes on them. We live in an age when stores sell exquisite stationery, and I'm sure I'm not the only person who buys such. On the other hand, I can't keep up with the volume of email and texts I receive, while a hand-written letter waiting for me in the mailbox is a rare treat nowadays.

Let you think I'm anti-electronic communication, let me assure you that I am not. I am happy that I can instantly converse with even far away friends and family in texts and emails and via Skype and all other manner of helpful technology. I think about mothers left in Europe, waiting for word of their pioneer children to cross perilous territory on the North American continent and to pass on slow ships across the Atlantic, and feel privileged to live in a time when I can so easily keep up with how my adult children are doing.

Still, I'd hate to see snail-mail letter writing fade away completely. What do you think? Is letter writing a dying art? Or, is it thriving? Do you think the revival of journal writing in recent years is a way that we are trying to capture something that we used to gain from writing letters? Do you like to put pen to paper, or would you rather text? Is there a way to have the best of both worlds -- electronic communiques and hand-written missives?

I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Enjoy!

2011-08-01T13:19:00.001-07:00

Day 17 (after a break!)

Smart Money Choices!

Consider the relative importance of stuff: A friend of mine told me this weekend that she had befriended a widow in her neighborhood. The widow went on a trip to Europe and was killed in an accident there. My friend went down to the house, where they were holding an estate sale, and she noticed -- with a pang -- that her friend had left behind lots and lots of stuff which she will now never be able to use.

I'm sure that this widow left behind a legacy of other things -- such as love for her family or faith or perhaps even well managed funds. But, if we are not careful, our legacy can be a lot of stuff that will burden our families when it comes time to clean out our dwelling places. In fact, if we Americans are not careful, we can spend the first part of our adult years accumulating things and the last part trying to get rid of things. I've been thinking about this a lot as I've been dealing with my own accumulation of things. Some of these are things we bought; others are things we inherited. Some do have value. A good many things, however, don't have any real value.

That's not to say that owning things is wrong. But, having too much stuff that you don't enjoy and realistically can't ever use becomes a negative drain. Treasure in heaven, on the other hand, is always positive!

Improve your skills and interests:

Keeping current with skills and interests can put money in your bank. Here are some reasons why: 1) In today's world, it is likely that we will change jobs at some point in our life. The person who is interested in life and who has developed his or her talents is better able to weather changes in work life. 2) Many of us will arrive at the retirement years with the health, time, and energy to begin a new vocation or avocation. We may also need to supplement our retirement income. Again, the person who has stayed invested in learning will be able to take advantage of later life opportunities. (For those who do not enter retirement with physical strength, learning can provide enjoyable stimulation, if nothing else.)
3) Those of us who have chosen to make home our career may need to take a temporary or even permanent job if circumstances change. Again, if you have continued to learn and to develop your skills, you can move into a new line of work if necessary. 4) We may have chosen a field that we find no longer satisfies us. If we have pursued learning a few other interests, we may be able to change to a more enjoyable job. Sometimes, however, we may have to be grateful for the job and the paycheck that we do have, even if it isn't our dream work. In that case, an avocation can add to our enjoyment of life. 5) The woman at home may organize charity events or otherwise be active in church and/or volunteer work. Continuing to learn helps us with this.

How does a busy woman continue to learn? Many have little time left over to study. In that case, we can do several things to develop our talents:

1) Devote just one hour a week or 15 minutes a day to study or practice.
2) Use time with friends to take an interest in their lives. Ask questions and learn about their activities.
3) Jot down things you want to remember on note cards or on your phone or I-pad and glance at them throughout the day.
4) If you are homeschooling, learn on a deeper level the things that you are teaching your children at their level. For example, if you are interested in science, you can teach your fifth grader things a fifth grader can understand while reading a graduate school level book yourself.
5) Keep a collection of books or files about a few subjects that interest you. It's probably better to study a few things deeply than to learn a little about this and that.
6) Keep up with current affairs, particularly in areas that interest you.
7) Take family outings to museums and other places of learning.

Enjoy!
Elizabeth

2011-06-20T12:24:00.000-07:00

Day 16

Doing it yourself can not only save you money, but add to your sense of satisfaction in life, as well. The June 2011 edition of Ladies' Home Journal quotes neuroscientist Kelly Lambert and other scientists as saying that hand work fights depression. Meaningful work with your hands releases floods of dopamine and serotonin that make us feel happy and satisfied. The work that best calls forth these happy chemicals is when we use our hands in anything related to survival, particularly regarding shelter and food. You don't have to hunt down game or plow a prairie in order to have this happy effect. Little activities, such as hemming a skirt, grooming your daughter's hair, darning a sock, growing some herbs, dicing onions, and the like signal to our brains that we are taking care of these essential needs. Mending things, repairing things, and otherwise using our hands to ensure that we get the most from our tools and clothes can fit into this category, as well.

The article also notes that doing soothing, repetitive chores with our hands distracts our brains from external stress and gives us some moments to relax mentally.

Enjoy!

2011-06-09T07:13:00.000-07:00

Thirty Days of Smart Money Choices -- Start young!!

According to a figure cited on Credit.com, people in the 18 to 24 age range spend nearly 30% of their monthly income on debt repayment. While I'm not sure when this statistic was gathered except that it was 2009 or after. However, Credit.com noted that this was double the percentage spent in 1992.

Devoting 30 per cent of your pay check to debt retirement is a burden at any time of life. For young singles and young couples just staring out in life, this is even more overwhelming. Young people generally just also acquire the basic needs in life -- a place to live, furniture, cars, etc. -- and for many there are also the costs of staring a family. They may still be finishing their education, particularly if they are going on to graduate school. There is also the risk that a young couple might delay having children until debt is paid, thus missing prime years for having and enjoying children.

A phenomenon sometimes mentioned with regard to this generation of 18 to 35 year olds is that many are delaying the usual hallmarks of maturity and independence. The title of the movie "Failure to Launch" takes its name from this syndrome. I'm sure that there are many cultural factors at work here, but, perhaps, the trend toward more and more debt is one of them.

How can parents of young children start now to help them avoid starting their adult life in debt?

1) Speak positively to your child about your child's future. Celebrate milestones of maturity from taking first steps to graduating from college to marriage and beyond.
2) Train young children how to handle money. Continue training through high school. Make a list of money skills that your children will need to acquire, and teach them as is age appropriate. Does your high school child know how to stick to a budget? Does he know what it takes to balance an account? To use a credit card responsibly? That doesn't mean that your child needs to have the responsibility for money management or a credit card at this age, but they should be preparing to step into these roles.
3) Teach your children the difference between needs and wants and how to reasonably enjoy both.
4) Help your child learn job skills that he or she can use while pursuing higher education.
5) Help your child assess his strengths and interests. Help him develop a vision for what he or she wants to do in life. Help him or her map out an educational strategy that will help him or her fulfil his or her goals.
6) Help your child not to fear failure. Teach your child how to find that balance between actively striving for goals, yet without perfectionism, insecurity, or a feeling that his or her total worth in life depends on reaching those goals.
7) Teach your child that his or her worth in life does not come through accumulating things.

enjoy!

2011-05-17T11:03:00.000-07:00

Doing Virtuous Business by Theodore Roosevelt Malloch

I received a copy of "Doing Virtuous Business" by Theordore Roosevelt Malloch from the Book Sneeze program in exchange for my honest review. I was expecting more of a "how-to" conduct one's business affairs justly, something more along the lines of "Business by the Book". However, while "Doing Virtuous Business" does provide some practical examples and a practical list of virtues to employ, it is more of a philosophical treatise about capitalism and ethics. Malloch explores the effects of religious beliefs of many different kinds on how an individual or a corporation operates. Since I am a Christian, it is his view of Christianity that interests me most.

In some senses, I think it is dangerous to link being a Christian to any one system of economics or politics. After all, the follower of Jesus lives by the values of God's kingdom and His righteousness, and God's principles and values are greatly different than any system based on worldly wisdom. The true Christian strives to be radically righteous, radically just, radically generous, and radically loving no matter what economic or political system he or she is placed in. Malloch lists virtues that not only build economic capital but spiritual capital, as well. These virtues, so far as they are Christ-like virtues, should be found in every believer in any economic circumstance.

However, there is not doubt that democracy and capitalism do provide unique opportunities and freedoms that can be used for great good. I am impressed that Malloch realises that mankind not only has a moral dimension, but a spiritual dimension, as well. Suppressing the spiritual dimension through economics, politics, or academics is never good for a country and its people. Encouraging the spiritual dimension to flourish blesses a nation.

Since I don't often read economic theory of any kind, reading Malloch's theories and also the examples of virtuous businesses that he describes is mind-stretching for me. I haven't decided yet what I think of some of Malloch's ideas, but I find it worthwhile to consider them. I am grateful to be in a democratic republic, as well as in a capitalist system, because I do enjoy freedom and the chance to use my talents in creative, profitable, ethical, and spiritual ways. I pray that our government and economy strengthen. I like the idea that in a capitalist society you can create material and spiritual capital. This is because it is an open and creative system of economy, as opposed to the closed systems of communism and socialism. However, should God, in His Sovereignty, move our country's system in another direction, I pray that He would show me ways to be Christlike in whatever that turns out to be.

Enjoy!

2011-05-17T08:00:00.001-07:00

Book Review: Here burns my Candle by Liz Curtis Higgs

I was given a free review copy of "Here Burns My Candle" by Liz Curtis Higgs. I was intrigued by the historical setting in Jacobite Scotland, as I, myself, have Scots ancestry. I also saw that this book is supposed to be a re-telling of the first part of the book of Ruth. The book's setting and theme had a lot of potential, I thought, and I looked forward to reading it. I do enjoy historical fiction and some historical romance.

I didn't feel that this book lived up to its promise. The relationships drawn between the three women and the two brothers seemed shallow compared to the relationships in the real book of Ruth. I realise that the author didn't mean this to be a verbatim re-telling and meant only to build on the basic idea. However, I thought that she blew a chance to give us more depth to her characters.

Also, a large sub-theme is the infidelity of the main character's husband. While this is a subject that people do deal with and could easily be analysed in Christian fiction, it seemed out of place in this particular story. It seemed as if it were thrown in for maudlin effect, rather than being a sub-plot that actually moved the story line or gave the story any depth.

When reading Christian fiction, I like to be inspired by the faith of the characters -- or at least that of the main character. Unfortunately, I didn't find much inspiration in theses pages.

On a more positive note, I thought it was clever that the main character began as a pagan, as Ruth surely would have been a pagan until influenced by her Jewish husband and parents-in-law -- her mother-in-law, Naomi, in particular. Whether someone would have actually been involved in pagan worship at that period of time in Scotland, I don't know. I imagine that the greater conflict would have been between Catholic loyalties and Protestant ones.

While Naomi in the book of Ruth had her faults, she was a godly influence on her daughters-in-law. The mother-in-law figure in the book doesn't seem as much of a godly influence on her family. Her faith seems more ritualistic and nominal. She is not close enough to her daughter-in-law to be aware of the struggles in her marriage or of her lack of knowledge of the Bible.

Others may like "Here Burns my Candle," but it wasn't my cup of tea.

Enjoy!

2011-05-06T10:32:00.000-07:00

30 days of Smart Money Choices -- Weddings

According to The Wedding Report, the average cost of an American wedding increased 22.9% in 2010, from $19,581 (2009) to $24,066. This is actually conservative compared to other articles I've read. Yet, many families I know have organised lovely weddings for a fraction of this cost.

When it comes to getting married, taking a honeymoon, and establishing that first place a couple will live, these things are an opportunity to spend money according to priorities. One couple might place a high priority on the wedding ceremony, while another may put more into the honeymoon, and still another save for future married life. One bride may place a high priority on the wedding dress, while another is more concerned about the cake and flowers. Deciding what a couple's priorities are requires a lot of communication between the bride and groom, as well as between the bride and her family and the groom and his. Deciding how to fit those priorities into the actual budget for the wedding requires communication, as well.

The bride, especially, will need to know what her wedding budget is and where she wants to place her funds. Knowing when to splurge and when to save can save a lot of headaches.

Of course, a wedding is generally one of the most special occasions in a family's life. Because weddings are so joyful, the Bible uses wedding imagery to help us understand something of what the wonders of heaven are like. However, young couples, especially the brides, should remember that after the wedding comes the marriage. After years of wedded bliss, some of the things that seem so important to you when planning your wedding will not be the things you happily remember of your wedding day. It's not necessary to spend lavishly on the wedding ceremony or honeymoon in order to celebrate the beginning of a wonderful, life long relationship. Many a happy marriage began with the simplest of weddings.

Not only should you think about your financial wedding budget, you should also think about your time budget, as well. Too many brides exhaust themselves trying to have the perfect wedding. (There is no such thing!) Some brides like this begin their married life in a state of nervous exhaustion instead of peaceful joy. Better to err on the side of simplicity and be freer to enjoy your wedding and first days of your marriage than to be consumed with details that drive you and your family and your beloved groom to distraction. It all depends on what you can personally manage. Tame the Bridezilla within you!

Today, many people wait until they are somewhat older to get married. Weddings between two people who have worked and have savings to add to the contribution of the brides parents are often featured in bridal magazines and other media. Couples who marry at younger ages and who have not each worked for very long will have smaller budgets and will be more dependent on the parents' budget. They will do well to remember that they do not have to compete with media images of the perfect wedding.

In fact, a couple should avoid comparing their wedding to that of any other couple. It is their special day. The important thing is that they are establishing a life together, not that they live up to someone else's special day. A couple who begins their marriage with contentment, faith, and joy will have a lovely day no matter what.

Here are seven tips for arranging a wedding within a budget:

1) Thirty years after my wedding day, I still have my wedding gown and intend to keep it unless someone should ever want to be married in my now old-fashioned dress. However, a bride in our family was not as sentimental about keeping her dress, and she sold it after her wedding. This is a way to re-coup some wedding costs. Another option if you are not attached to keeping your dress is to rent a dress. Yes! There are places that will rent you beautiful dresses for a fraction of the cost of buying one. If you do want to buy and keep your dress, do a cost comparison of buying one verses having someone sew it, particularly if a seamstress in your circle of family and friends will do the sewing for free. My mother-in-law married back in the era when tea-length gowns were fashionable, and she made her own dress. Later on, when she needed a dress for an occasion and her clothing budget as a newly wed was tight, she died her wedding gown and wore it! Her husband -- my father-in-law -- did not recognise at first that she was wearing the same dress, because she had made it look new.
2) A current custom among some is to have two dresses: one for the wedding and one for the reception immediately afterward. You have only a short time to be in your wedding gown. Think carefully before deciding that you really do want two gowns. You will get more enjoyment out of your wedding gown and save money on wedding costs by wearing your wedding dress all the way through the reception. Of course, you may want a less formal going-away outfit or a second dress for a party that will be given at another time or on another date than your wedding. However, if you choose wisely, these outfits will be something that you will wear again and again.
3) Chances are great that if you are getting married, someone you know either just had a wedding or is also planning one. Check into borrowing items or sharing items or buying bulk items together.
4) Vintage wedding rings can be re-set and are often a less expensive and more beautiful purchase than a brand new ring.
5) If you are getting married in your home city and in the church you usually attend, you fill likely know many women who have planned weddings in that building and/or reception hall if you are using the church reception hall. Usually, there are even a few women who take on the ministry of helping brides prepare for their weddings. Take advantage of their advice.
6) Create a folder or a notebook in which you can keep your wedding plans, as well as pictures or notes for wedding ideas. Often, you can take an idea that you see in a magazine or on a wedding web site or at a wedding and re-produce something similar for less expense. Be sure to visit web sites that offer example of budget weddings.
7) Many of us start planning our weddings when we are little girls and have definite ideas about what we want. While we may be able to incorporate many of our dreams into our actual wedding, we may have to be flexible about others. It's more important that you are marrying the love of your life than that you are creating a dream wedding.

Enjoy!

2011-05-05T13:48:00.000-07:00

Thirty Days of Smart Money Choices....

1) When couponing, make sure that any coupon you use will represent a "real saving". By that, I mean that the coupon must be for an item and a brand that you really want. For some items, I do care about which brand I buy. For other items, a house brand is fine for our family. Sometimes, a coupon for a brand name item will only bring it in line with the regular price for another brand's equivalent or for the house brand's equivalent. Also, we can get carried away with cutting out coupons and clip coupons for products that we really don't have a desire for or a use for. If you really do not desire that particular item in that particular brand, the coupon doesn't represent real savings for you. However, if it allows you to buy a brand that you do love or an item that you really need, that is a real savings.
2) Encourage any of your children who are earning money through babysitting, doing chores, or working at a job to give a certain amount of their income, to save a certain amount of their income, and let them use the rest as they see fit. (That is, of course, provided that they use it in a way that is in line with your family's values.) This will teach them habits of giving and saving early. Starting with monetary discipline at a young age is so much easier than trying to acquire it later on.
3) We are not vegetarian, but we do not mind meatless meals. Well-balanced, meatless meals can often be cheaper to cook than ones which include meat. Also, you can stretch your meat budget through using little bits of meat in stir-fries, casseroles, etc.
4) The worthy woman in Proverbs 31 was likened to merchant ships bringing back their food from afar. How would merchant ships operate? The merchant would likely select the best of something for the best price. He or she would be knowledgeable about the goods to be traded. For example, a spice merchant would have a thorough knowledge of spices, and a clothing merchant would be able to identify quality merchandise. As the food manager of your home, it's worthwhile to educate yourself about many different aspects of foods from nutrition to quality to seasonal supply to how to cook them to the best ways to season them, etc. Learn, for example, what the various cuts and grades of meats are and how they should best be cooked.
Learn enough to be a smart shopper. You don't have to know it all at once, and you don't have to become a gourmet chef in order to make some good choices with your food money. Just gradually learn what you need to know for your purposes and keep learning throughout life.
5) Dental work can be very expensive, but not everyone has dental insurance. Sometimes, even if you do not have access to dental insurance through your work, you can qualify for a dental discount plan. Search your options. Verify that the discount plan is sound and will be a benefit to you. The dental discount may not cut your costs as much as insurance would, but every dental dollar helps.
6) Maintaining your teeth will cut down on expenses and pain! Of course, we all know that it's important to floss and brush our teeth. Likewise, it's wiser to go for regular check-ups than to wait until you have a problem to visit the dentist. Even if you practice tip-top dental hygiene, there is no guarantee that you won't ever have some problems with your teeth. Sometimes, things befall us that are no fault of our own. However, if you do neglect your teeth, you can pretty much count on paying for it later on down the road.
7) Wearing your sunscreen throughout life can cut down on the expense (and pain) of dealing with pre-cancerous damage to your skin. Obviously, those of us who can't tan are at highest risk. However, even if you tan easily or even if you have very dark skin, you can sustain some sun damage. No matter what your skin type or ethnic background, some type of sun protection is advisable. Talk to your doctor about what is best for you.

Enjoy!

2011-04-28T08:53:00.001-07:00

30 days of smart money choices...

1) Join Sally Beauty Supply' discount plan for smart savings on beauty products. This gives you a discount on their already low prices for health and beauty items.
2) Cut down on paper towel usage by using old diapers, rags, or the thin weight, lint-free flour sack type towels that you can find at any discount store. Our great-grandmothers kept clean houses before the invention of paper towels. Rags are easy to wash and re-use. Save paper towels for when you really need the instant convenience.
3) Need a quick update for your home, as well as a way to pull mis-matched furniture together? Coat the items with a layer of either white paint or black paint. With family antiques, make sure that painting the furniture will not devalue the item's worth. Otherwise, happy painting!
4) Can't afford an interior designer? Likely, you know someone who is an amateur, but who has a good knack for decorating. Invite her over for a glass of iced tea and ask her for some decorating advice. Of course, her tastes may differ than yours, so be sure to take that into account and stay true to your own style. However, someone with a good eye can usually spot ways you can attractively arrange things that you own and that suit your taste. Such a talented friend can also help when you are deciding between two or three choices of fabric swatches or paint colors.
5) Think of a home magazine that you enjoy and visit that magazine's web site or sign up for their twitters for ideas and inspiration. Most sites offer some how to articles and provide pictures of looks which you might be able to duplicate on a thrift-store budget. Here's my list of some great home and home decorating magazines with sites to enjoy.

Better Homes and Gardens
Traditional Home Magazine
Romantic Homes Magazine
Coastal Living
Southern Lady Magazine
Southern Living
Real Simple Magazine
House Beautiful
Fresh Home Magazine blog
Country Living

Enjoy!