A Screed in Time

What's "The Dish" at Walt Disney Imagineering?

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 16:15:00 +0000

Evermore

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Fri, 06 Apr 2012 01:21:00 +0000

“Are you prepared to die?’

The voice came from the man seated across from me on the bus, and the casual manner in which he asked me the question made me think that maybe I was hearing a random voice in my head. They have been coming back more frequently now that I no longer had a source for my medication so, to me, another random voice in my head was nothing to concern myself with.

“Are you prepared to die?”

Okay, now this was getting a little annoying, I mean having a voice inside your head is one thing but for it to keep asking you the same question over again was borderline redundant and I was not a particular fan of redundancy. Which is ironic considering what I did for a living; there was a whole lot of redundancy built into my job. I wish the voices in my head had warned me about that, it would have been very helpful. Of course they probably wouldn’t be in my head if I had a position with a company that didn’t deal with doing the exact same thing, over and over, day after day.

“Are you prepared to die?”

I must have dozed off or something because when I opened my eyes at the sound of those words, the man was seated next to me. Funny that he hadn't smelled bad from three feet away, but now with this close proximity he reeked of alcohol, cheap cologne and, was that urine? His faced looked as if it had survived a battle with a blender, the scars crisscrossed in a pattern that made me think of pick up sticks from my childhood, except for the colors, which were all either reddish purple or white, depending on how far along the healing process was, I imagine. His teeth were a nice shade of brown, yet his eyes were a remarkable green that seemed completely out of place. It fascinated me just the same.

“Are you prepared to die?”

Again with that question, which was definitely coming from his foul-smelling mouth and not the foul-tempered voices in my head. Now I needed to come up with an answer as it seemed that the bus was moving approximately an inch per hour, and my stop was still several blocks away – an eternity at the current rate. Now the voices started to ask me some serious questions and I had a choice to make, voices in my head or voices from the old smelly dude. I decided to listen to my own community to see if they had any insight into my situation.

“Whew, where did that guy climb out of a dumpster from, the local fast food joint?”

That was the voice I named Justin as in just in time for a mean and sarcastic comment. He never failed to have one.

“Maybe he’s trying to hit you up for some money. You are dressed for business today so maybe he thought he would take a chance with you.”

That was Celeste. Yes, I have a woman’s voice inside my head, doesn’t everyone? She is the practical and no-nonsense mom of the voices, always looking for why something happened and always good for some practical advice when the situation warranted. At least that is what she told me. Besides, I was dressed in one of my more expensive suits, so she really did make sense.

“I told you taking the bus wasn’t worth the risk.”

That would be Fred, my cowardly voice. He always liked to tell me that he would rather be a cowardly voice that is still a voice, than a brave voice that no longer existed.

“You are being rude.”

This voice was new. I was pretty sure that the man’s lips never moved, yet somehow I heard him. In my head.

“You can stop acting all paranoid, Charlie, and just answer my question; are you prepared to die?”

Well that pretty much made today the number one day for my craziness. Some old, drunken, decrepit man with eyes that shouldn’t be, is now in my head telling me that I am being rude and really succeeding in freaking me out.

“Who you calling decrepit? And before you jump back into that mind of yours, realize that I am following along with every conversation, so you might as well talk to me, Charlie.”

“Um, okay,” I managed weakly.

“Now isn’t this better? Talking like two civilized people on a bus, just passing the time until our stops.”

“How do you know my name?” I asked in a slightly less dazed but still weak voice.

“Your nametag.”

“What? Oh my goodness, I forgot that was there,” I tore at the paper adhesive nametag that said: "Hi, I’m Charlie." I was coming back from one of those fancy little seminars where they talk about all the features that their equipment could do that no one else’s can. Boring as all get out, but the free lunches were pretty good and you could usually sneak out at some point in the afternoon. I could still taste the roast beef on rye with a hint of dill pickle and Cheetos.

“Are you prepared to die?”

“Why do you keep asking me that? I mean is it important to you for some reason, do you have a tract that tells me all about your deity and how he/she/it will save me from eternal damnation, but only if I give you all my money and bow down to you, my poppa/granddad/father figure?”

“Are you finished?”

“Yes," I started, “I think I am. This is my stop coming up and I have to get prepared to exit the bus.”

I have seen many television shows and movies where all the action seems to stop, with the exception of a character or two, and always thought it to be a far-fetched deus ex machina that helped move the plot along without having to explain a whole lot of actions/events that occurred to get to this point. In other words, a really convenient way to get from point A to point B in a story.

Well, that just happened. Everything stopped. Except for me and.

“What is your name anyway?” I asked, wondering why it took so long to ask this of the stranger, yet not really concerned.

“Well, I have quite a few; there is Thanatos, Odin, Ankou and, of course, the Grim Reaper.”

“What? Wait? You, you are death?”

“Always knew you were a smart kid Charlie.”

“But that’s just legends, and mythology and fairy tales meant to scare kids, and…” I trailed off not knowing what else to say.

“It’s also pretty cruel. I mean what is there to be afraid of? Everyone has to die sooner or later, so making me into some kind of monster just results in, well, look at yourself.”

“Yeah, but I’m not ready to die.”

“That’s what they all say, kid.”

Delectable Delights

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Thu, 05 Apr 2012 02:57:00 +0000

Dystopia - an imaginary place where people lead dehumanized and often fearful lives.

The end of the world has been supposedly prophesied for Friday December 21, 2012.

I'm here to tell you that they were wrong, the world as we knew it ended on July 17, 2012 when the forces of evil - sorry I cannot think of a better term for them at the moment - attack everyone.

That's right everyone.

If you were near evil on that date, you were pretty much toast.

And then buttered.

And finally consumed.

Yeah, life as we knew it was over and the new life pretty much sucked eggs.

I am still alive though, so I figured that I would take this "free" time that I have to write down a few quick things that may or may not help anyone in the faraway future when this evil scourge decides to come back for some more fun.

Like I said, evil has taken over the world, and wouldn't you know it but they made themselves look just like us.

Talk about not fighting fair.

I'm sure that if you complained though, they really wouldn't care. Just pull out some more butter and maybe some salt for taste, and then munch on your nose for a little while before they hit the main course, the... never mind, let's just say, you will wish to be dead by then, but you won't be.

They are everywhere and you must be very careful who you trust. In fact, my best friend turned out to be evil. Lucky for me, I saw him eat his wife, so I was prepared .

I... Hold on, I think they have found me, I have to go....

(to be continued?)

Chocolate

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 16:42:00 +0000

That is all. :)

Chicken, Fries and Bugs oh my!

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 02:53:00 +0000

I live in the Fox Valley in Northern Illinois, roughly fifty miles west of Chicago. It is a nice and quiet little town of roughly 26,000 residents most of the year.

Currently that number has seemed to increase exponentially by, well, a whole lot!

Let's be conservative here and say that the population has increased recently by at least a million.

Apparently we are having a huge party that someone forgot to invite me to - I seem to always be the last to know these things. I noticed the extra traffic this evening when I took my son to get his favorite snack of "chicken and fries."

So bad was the traffic and the - I'll call it what it is, air pollution - that I had to close my sunroof and windows on the family 'minivan of extreme coolness' just to be able to breathe. It was bad people. Even my son was freaked out and wanted me to fix it.

Have any of you ever tried to fix a problem for a freaked out two year old? Not an easy task, even with the promised chicken and fries.

After that last journey we have decided that venturing into town in the evenings while this great river bug infestation is going on - hopefully it will be over in a couple of days.

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 02:24:00 +0000

Acceptance.

I need to learn to accept the fact that I am once again trying to revitalize this blog by joining another interesting - at least by outward appearances (to me) - blog party. This April, which started today, some 21 hours ago, I will be posting daily, except for Sundays (this Sunday obviously has been made an exception) with a theme for each day that starts with a different letter.

Today being the first day of the month, the letter is A.

Hopefully I understand what is going on, if not please leave me a comment and let me know what I am doing wrong. Also, since I have the newest Blogger, I cannot figure out how to add the badge to my blog, a simple mind I do have, so I will just add it to each post. That I can figure out.

I also read that these should be short and sweet, so I think I will end it here. :)

Which is Tyler Durden?

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 15:12:00 +0000

A Whole Bunch of Silly Going On

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 05:21:00 +0000

As you may or may not know, I have been writing seven hundred and fifty words (at a minimum) per day for the past few months and I occasionally post what I write there, here. This is the case here. Now mind you, this is totally silly and off the cuff and it was basically fifteen minutes of straight typing and "story telling" going on here. There will be grammatical and spelling issues so if anyone doesn't like that sort of thing, you have been warned. Hope you enjoy it.

Na na na na hey hey hey good bye!

I have no idea what that was about but it popped into my head and I shared it with you, who is me, who is we and we all can come together, right now.

Blah de blah de blah hot chocolate and apple sauce along with a banana and there will be fighting in the trenches no doubt and we are all going to die, someday. So why not go out with a bang, right?

So do we take our hot little sports car and drive it as fast as we can towards that wall at the end of the block, just remember that we have several gallons of fuel siting there next to you and you can be smoking or something just to make it all flame out big time because well, you really want to make a show. So why not call the police and the news and have them witness it and save it for all posterity and such. Think about how infamous you will become as your images will continue to play through at least three news cycles and if you leave a letter behind you can make it so that when they finally find it they will all marvel at the maturity of your response to the current situation that you are in and then you will flip the page and there will be a picture of your sister in ;law naked on face book because she has not a ounce of maturity or intelligence in her body.

Chocolate!

Or we can have aliens flying by in their space cruiser decide that they want to show us puny earthlings a thing or two so they come by really really close to the planet, close enough that the actually knock the moon off of it's orbit and sends it flying through the galaxy towards lord knows where and it doesn't really matter since they are also responsible for knocking the earth off of its orbital path and send it hurling towards the sun, or would that be hurdling towards the sun, or gurtingly towards the sun... okay that is just being silly, but who cares since the planet is on a crash course with the sun and you have done the math and you realize that we are only ninety some odd million miles away from that gaseous orb in the sky that has nothing but bad intentions on its mind. After all it thinks that we are attacking it, even though Venus and mercury saw the whole thing and mars thinks it did, but the same space cruiser actually knocked them a little silly and... remember that moon of ours? well as you can imagine the shock of mars as it looks up into the sky and sees a new satellite in its sky and realizes that they are about to either have high tides or a really really big whole in the planet. So what do you think is going to happen? Why Bruce Willis will board a space shuttle and sacrifice himself for the planet by taking a HUGE tow rope out there and wrapping it around the equator so that he can tow the planet back into its normal orbit because that is what Bruce Willis does. Only there is a small problem, NASA decided to retire the shuttles and put them in the Smithsonian and a couple other places so we have to rely on some Russian or French ship that just doesn't have the horsepower needed to tow a planet. Now I know what you are saying... "Roger, there is no friction in space and no one can hear you scream, so why not take the soyuz thing and push the planet?" .... That is pretty much the dumbest thing I have ever heard, and I am not even going to think about it anymore. But you did give me an idea... everyone sends their missiles up up and away into the sky, towards the sun and that will push the planet back, right? Okay, that's pretty lame too, so where are we?

Bruce Willis takes the newest Virgin spaceship up into the sky, with Richard Branson, mostly because well, he looks good on the camera, has a pretty awesome accent and well he doesn't like to share much. So they get a big rope wrapped around the equator and then attach it to the space ship that Virgin has donmated to the cause and Bruce and Richard step on the gas and the planet starts to move... towards the sun. Which is actually the way you want to go because they willactually be pulling the planet back into its orbital path quicker that way and they warned everyone to wear their highest SPF sunscreen, just in case. Except that Al Gore says that because of their actions the planet is warming up and the glaciers are melting which means the oceans are rising, blah, blah, blah and DUH! So he has the brilliant idea to take one of his many yachts out to the equator and cuts the rope!

Yes he did.

He is stupid that way.

So what happens? Well Bruce and Richard are pulling on the planet and when the tension is released in the rope they get shot into the sun - bye by e Mr Willis and Mr Branson (Maybe). The earth meanwhile is violently pulled towards the sun where it will then be consumed in a great ball of flame and all life on the planet ends.

Meanwhile....

Bruce and Richard actually shot through and past the sun and actually knock the moon off of its course towards mars and they land safely on that planet where they are welcomed as heroes and new rulers to the realm of mars... Oh, did I mention that Richard brought along a couple of young ladies, figuring that he and Bruce would be celebrating the earth being saved and all, and join the multi-million mile high club, but now they are rulers of mars and are each given half the planet to rule as they please.

Moral of the story? It's good to be Bruce Willis.

I'm Human - Liberty Broadcasting Squad

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 18:28:00 +0000

Jumbled, just the way I like it

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 19:39:00 +0000

Because I can and will I think I should do this writing thing now as opposed to later since I will have children to deal with, a wife to love and a work out that is more than way overdue to do. Try saying that last part fast five or six times; overdue to do...

So where were we? I wrote a quick story for Jessie last night, well not really for her per se but suggested by her and I honestly think it turned out pretty good considering it took me about fifteen minutes to write and there will be lots of words to cut down and even some more to expound upon, or would that be expand from? Not sure the definitions of words in my head are matching up with the definition coming from various and sundry dictionary's. I love that I just used sundry there, as I have always had a strong feeling towards that particular word.

Not really.

However, if I ever were to fall in love with a word, sundry is no worse than say pickle, which just sounds nasty, and then there is the fascination that some people, mostly women, have with the word moist. Why is that I wonder? Maybe I should post that as a status on Plurk or Facebook or Google plus and take a survey as to why that is. Worse thing that will come from that will be... nothing really. Other than people ignoring me, for which I am fond of and thankful for. You see, if I were to become famous I would probably be miserable. Now if I were to be rich, well that I could probably handle.

Lost the rest of another tooth today - about eight minutes ago in fact, or was it more like twelve. Does not really matter in the end, but I think it is coming to a head here with my ignoring the tooth issue and I think that I will be in dire need, or at least some need of some new chompers be they dentures or implants, or maybe I'll just become gummy. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Now that was a phrase that pays oh so long long ago, what maybe ten years? Not nearly as good or as enduring as, if it is to be it is up to me. I so very much love that, along with the phrase all that jazz because of my affinity towards jazz music I guess, although if the truth were to be told I listen to pretty much anything with jazz being a ways down on the list, behind classical music in fact, so since we need to be telling the truth here, I figured that I would get that off of my chest. It is a beautiful thing, music, that makes the world go round and round. Just take a moment and stop what you are doing and listen to the music all around you.

Seriously. The next time you step outside, I want you to just stand there, or sit if you would like, and listen to the music that is playing all around you. You have the slight rustling of leaves, or branches in the areas where we have no leaves left on our trees, and tell me that you don't hear any music. Go ahead, try it, you will be amazed at what amount of noise is being made while being silent. Then you may even find yourself moving to the melody that the leaves, or branches, are playing. It's all good I tell you, and you will not be disappointed. Of course then you will have the obtuse sounds of motor vehicles sputtering along trying to overtake the sweet sounds of the rustling branches and leaves. Occasionally you will hear a sparrow chime in their part or better yet a robin. Ah, music is everywhere. It's even in my head as I am typing this, it kind of sounds like "Boys of Summer" by Don Henley, which brings back memories of a simpler time in my life when I was trying oh so hard to play grown up only to have it fail and I fell flat on my face, yet I still love the song and the image of the kid playing the drums in front of a video screen - such a powerful video and if you get a chance you should go and watch it, and I promise you this, if I post this on the blog, I will have it linked or embedded here, as long as it is legal and all.

By the way, in case you didn't catch that, I have my head phones on and that is the song that is currently playing...

See, I knew you could catch on to these things, just like how it has turned to "Sunset Grill" another excellent song, but one that doesn't hold me as much as "Boys of Summer" which kind of shows a point that I really didn't know I was going about trying to prove, which is music is great and all around you and everyone should stop and turn the volume controls up every now and again, either by being quiet, or plugging in your head phones. Sorry that came out all jumbled and confusing, just like myself every now and again, especially after a few shots of vodka - which I have not had, mind you, so I cannot use that as an excuse.

So where was I going with this today?

Oh yeah, Go Broncos!!

Pax!

The Moment

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 06:03:00 +0000

Running up and down the court trying to catch my breathe I couldn't believe that we were down by so many points, but we still had five minutes left in the game and I just knew that we could make a game of it. All we needed was some discipline and some good shooting, otherwise we might as well pack in it and go home.

Timeout.

Coach gave us some encouragement and told us that he thought we were playing really well but if we could find it in ourselves to dig a little deeper and try to get some more points and what not... I can not really remember much because I had a strange feeling over take me and I just remember being at total peace with myself and the situation. When the whistle blew, I just knew that we would come back, after all it was only twenty seven points, right?

If it is to be it is up to me was my mantra. I wanted that ball.

We took the throw in and headed down the court, I was pacing along side my point guard imploring her to give me the ball. With our team being down by so much, the other team couldn't play any defense outside the three point circle. My dad and I were just practicing those shots the other day, and I started getting pretty good at them. The secret was in the arc of the ball. You might think that you were giving it too much, yet for some reason it seemed that the higher the arc the better the shot.

My point guard decided to go to the three and see what she could do, and as she picked up her dribble, I instinctively knew that she was going to lose the ball to number fourteen. Number fourteen has been our main nemesis on this team for three years running, she is quite the athlete and I could see the ball being stripped from my team mates hand and she would be off down the court, so I started edging towards the other basket knowing full well that I would be making a defensive play very soon, or at least trying to.

Yet, I knew that I would get the ball back and bring it up court and take one of those three point shots, and I just knew that it would go in and we would be down by only twenty four points. So when number fourteen stole the ball from our number three I was already heading down the court to play defense. It was at that moment that every thing went into a slow motion mode so that I could see every flake of dust coming off of the ball and number fourteen's finger tips. I could see the way the floor actually gave way to the pressure inflicted upon it by the weight of number fourteen as she was running towards her basket. I could see the flattening of the basketball as it hit the court with a force that seemed to be much greater than I realized, with the ball flattening literally a quarter of it's own size. I could see the way number fourteen looked at me and my defensive position and thought that she had a basket for sure. I could see the over confident smirk in her face, and the twinkle of mischief in her eyes - now why I thought it was a look of mischief was beyond me, even in those moments because after all it really was just a basketball game, our first of the season, and nothing magical or dramatic would happen to us if we won, or if we lost, but it was definitely mischief and it sort of scared or startled me because I could tell that I was going to be going up against a competitor unlike any I had faced before.

I shuffled to my left to get a more direct position to make a play against number fourteen and she made a little adjustment herself. It was amazing how she altered her foot just a little to her left which made her move more to my right, yet at the same time my instincts took over and I moved to my right at the same moment. It was then that I saw concern and disbelief on number fourteens eyes and I knew that the ball was soon going to be mine and that this play was going to be the breaking point that got us started on our way towards the victory that we so desperately wanted and needed to rebuild the confidence in our own abilities. We would no longer allow number fourteen or any other player to push us around and treat us like we didn't know what was going on. She would never again take us so lightly. She might even grow up and become my best friend, and we will be in each others weddings and be the god mothers to each others children. This moment was going to change the world.

This was my moment.

Number fourteen started to leave the ground in preparation for taking the shot...

*** Jessie asked me to write a story about basketball for my 750 words tonight - 16 minutes and 870 words later, this was what came out. - Thanks Jessie! ***

Jazz and Shizz

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 05:32:00 +0000

I thought about getting a beer to go with today's installment then I thought better of it because I really don't feel like having a beer just to have a beer you know, especially some domestic beer like Miller Lite or something... Now if mayber, per chance, there was a Southwicks... then maybe... Nah, I still wouldn't want one, and if I did I am pretty sure that I wouldn't want to be writing here at this point in time any more than I do at the moment. So you know what that means right?

If it is to be it is up to me and all that jazz!

I love how I just took two different phrases and melded them together into some sort of weird mantra that gets me slightly motivated about doing this writing thing which I would think would not be needing any motivation especially since I have written over one hundred and fifteen thousand words over the past three and one half months.not that it means that much unless you want a book of gibberish, half truths some wicked expose and a lot of, but not as many as you probably think, I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I II I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I II I I I II II I I II II I I I I I I I I I II I II I I I II I II I I I II 'S

So whacked out I am that I feel justified in writing several I's and feel like I have written several other words that I can string together to make wonderful sentences, mesmerizing paragraphs and sensuous chapters that make up such a loving book that generations will cherish and share with their children and grandchildren and which someday a rare first edition of it will be auctioned off at Christie's and fetch over seventy seven million dollars, of which I will see none of, but whomever does sell it for that, I hope you do good things with it.

Hey have I told you that I am some sort of freak genius that knows stuff that others just cannot comprehend - either that I know it or that I know it, you know what I mean? Maybe I should put some sort of emphasis on there and then add at the end of the paragraph a parenthetical stating that the emphasis was added. Because that is what the cool people do and I just know that I am one of the cool people at least in my mind although there has been some recent stirrings going on in there that make me somewhat nervous due to the fact that there are way more of them than there is of them?

Anyway.

Yesterday I said that Michelle Bachmann would drop out of the race for the good old party's presidential nomination, and guess what? She did. I also said that Rick Perry would probably think long and hard about his choices and then decide to quit the race as well... okay I didn't actually say all that, the Rick Perry part I am so owning the Michelle Bachmann part because , well, you know I actually published that shizz on my blog and who knows maybe this will go there as well, only I need to start insulting more people and causing a stirring in the controversial pot, so to speak, because you know life around the blog is rather boring and dull and out of specifications when it comes to the almighty SEO and shizz.

No, I have no idea what SEO and shizz actually stand for or mean, but I do like dropping them in here every now and again because like the good Doctor would say "they are like bow ties, so they are cool." I'm am pretty sure that he would say that and I firmly believe that the only reason he didn't like the apple that Amelia Pond gave him was because it was neither a Gala nor a Fuji apple which are BY FAR, the absolute best apples ever made/created/ hatched/grown/harvested - whatever. Funny how just by adding that slash in between those five words, it made it look like and only count as one. What "it" is - it is definitely not some freaky freaking clown that lives in the storm sewer, but rather the program that I originally typed all this shizz (see I cannot stay away from it) on for 750words.com and that is where I am at write now, so to speak in a purely metaphysical manner - at least I think it is an a metaphysical manner otherwise I totally use that word wrong and it takes my whole genius claim and throws it out the door.

Got it?

Pax!

A Rant, of sorts

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 05:27:00 +0000

This is getting to be a bit nuts, I mean here I go and plan everything down to the minute, more or less, okay maybe it is closer to the hour, but still. Here I am with fifty nine minutes left to write my seven hundred and fifty words and I have nothing to say or write about... The Iiowa caucua weas today and wow, did I ever butcher those three words... Iowa caucus was today - much better, and you know what we found out? That they cannot decide between the ultra social conservative Catholic Rick Santorum, who by the way supported a pro choice candidate over a pro life one which is a big no no in my book, so he will not be getting my vote in the primary (if he is even still around) and the somewhat wishy washy conservative wanna be who is more of a moderate than anything else and who has also flipped on the whole pro life dealy and brought Romney Care to Massachusetts which is just as bad, if not worse than Obama care, Mitt Romney.

*** just because spell check says that I have misspelled some words does not mean that they are misspelled okay? Just saying that some of the words I use are words that others just haven't thought of yet***

Where was I? Oh yeah, Iowa. So what have we learned? Let's see; Rick Perry spent a boatload of money to finish in fifth place out of six candidates that were running in Iowa. Technically there were seven on the ballot but John Huntsman decided to not even try and win the state and is sitting back enjoying some martini's in New Hampshire. Michelle Bachmann will probably start concentrating on her reelection campaign for her seat in the House from Minnesota (she came in sixth by the way). Newt Gingrich didn't do too bad considering that he never really started putting people in the state to help him until about a month ago when he became the candidate du jour. Ron Paul, that crazy Republican, er Libertarian from Texas came in third with about twenty percent of the vote, which is not bad for a crazy old man that claims he isn't a politician even though he has spent nearly thirty years in political office of some shape or form, including the past twenty four years as a congressman from the great state of Texas. I think I have that right, if this is posted and I am wrong and my son Benjy sees it, he will correct me no doubt. He is a huge rEVOLution guy and believes that Ron Paul is the bees knees so to speak. I like his stance on the Fed (a waste of government expenditure), the UN ( a waste in general), but do not agree with him in regards to national defense, in particular our current policy of trying to help keep the peace world wide and bombings those that disagree with us.... wait, I don't really like that either. Maybe that candidate predictor thing that I took was correct and I am a Ron Paul supporter. News to me, but I digress.

Which leads us to our two top dogs in the Iowa caucus, Mr. Santorum - a Catholic that apparently forgot what the Church teaches with regards to the sanctity of life, when it came to supporting a pro choice weasel (Arlen Spector, over a pro life candidate Pat (I think) Toomey - and Mitt Romney the multi millionaire former governor of the fine state of Massachusetts, who said he was pro choice to get elected in the pro choice state and then when it came to the national audience he is now pro life and says that he has always been - oh and he is also a Mormon which I really don't care about, but those crazy evangelicals will I am sure. And you know what? I got so long winded there that I completely forgot where I was going...

Or did I?

That is the point I think. Nothing, absolutely nothing, has been determined here today in the caucus of Iowa. I do believe this though, Mitt Romney will be rolling over every single candidate - including you and your martini's Mr Huntsman - in New Hampshire and will then probably roll to a couple more victories on the way to the ultimate prize on Super Tuesday and he will be the candidate for president of these here United States against the bozo that is there now. And I don't mean to besmirch Bozo the Clown with that comment, because I actually like that clown. Anyway, that's how I see it and that is how it has been written by me. I think I will post a briefer version of this on my blog for the world to get mad at me about. I love that sort of thing, don't you know.

Since this will be posted there, I should point out that this entire piece was written in about twenty minutes without any supporting documentation, so in other words it is an opinion piece and it is mine, so take it or leave it as I am not really caring. Oh, and any misspellings are more than likely intentional, as is the piss poor grammar. What can I say, it is late at night, my back hurts and I think I need to lie down and get some sleep.

Pax!

Happy New Year!

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 02:40:00 +0000

Wow, can you believe that it is 2012 already? Where has the time gone? Let's see if we can do a recap here for you - by that I mean, let's see what I can remember.

January - Cold... Grey... COLD. Pretty much wraps that month up. Well, that and I continued to work out at the gym to lose my winter weight that I have acquired over eighteen plus winters of marriage. What can I see, I like being the jolly guy apparently - and in case you were wondering, I still have a bit of weight to lose, not as much as before, but still more than I am proud of.

February - Work is starting to take its toll on our hero as he is coming to the realization that he has a job that has no description and has two bosses that have no idea what to do with each other let alone with him. This will prove to be an interesting time in his life as he tries to work out all of this while keeping his multiple bosses happy, as well as, those who look to him for guidance and the like. I also think that we had a "snow day" for work - paid even, because of a pretty big snow storm. Or it could have happened in March, like I said I am trying to remember these things, and I am not relying on the blog, which seems odd to me now that I think about it.

March - Danny turned five, which means there is a Disney trip in his near future- lucky kid. Oh wait, what's that, we get to go too? Sa-weet! Now June is gonna rock way more than it normally does. Jenni also had a birthday, and if I say so myself - which I always do - she looks great! I am so blessed to have her as my wife and best friend.

April - Pretty blase' month to tell you the truth, as I don't think anything really happened then, other that the promise of a great vacation in two months and some better weather.

May - Maggie received her first Holy Communion in May, she is growing up so fast. Andy also finished his sophomore year at Loras.

June - Dominated by a certain trip to a certain magical place in Florida, I am sure I might have mentioned it a few times, and I bet I added some pictures as well. And since I didn't blog nearly as much as I liked in 2011, it shouldn't be too hard to find, right? Jenni and I celebrated our nineteen years together in Orlando, granted we weren't there on the actual date of our anniversary, but it was close enough.

July - the shoes started dropping at work. I was put back on the bench, which really wasn't a bad thing, since I really don't believe that there was much focus on the top and it enabled me to feel productive once again and start working and earning some over time pay again, which is always very helpful, let me tell you. The country celebrated it's 235th anniversary, even with the knuckleheads in Washington doing their best to bankrupt us and make us start to burn like Rome did so many centuries ago. Will 2012 show any kind of changes, probably not since they are all politicians that care more about themselves then anything else, which is really sad and I am pretty sure that the founders are rolling their eyes while rolling in their graves over what has become of this once fine republic. Oh yeah, and Timmy turned two!

August - brought the school year back to a start and a trip to Wisconsin for me - my first work onsite in almost five years. It was nice to get that change of pace, but I really do miss my family while away, and I don't think that I could ever see myself doing that kind of work for very long. A week every now and again, might be okay, but I would really rather just hang loose at home and soak in the atmosphere and climate.

September - brought Katie closer to the teen years and brought a close to a chapter at work that involved my direct supervisor for almost five years leaving the company to pursue other opportunities - in other words he was shown the door because they felt that the issues brought up by him were just too dang logical or something and we can't have anybody thinking like that now can we? Never mind the fact that in the few months he has been gone, we have started to implement changes that he wanted to do all along. Guess he was just too smart for them.

October - brought Benjy closer to the end of his teen years and Jessie fully enveloped into hers. Oh and I had a birthday as well. I also started writing daily at 750words.com. I have well over 100,000 words written that will make a great work some day. Only if it can be deciphered by the few that are as crazy as I am I imagine. It also inspired me to get back to blogging here on a regular basis, starting with today, we'll see how long and well it will last and go. I do want to make the time to pursue it though, as I think I am finally realizing how important it is to me.

November - Maggie has one year left in the single digits, and apparently still rules the roost when it comes to me. Yes, she is my baby girl and all but there should be better limits set by me I think. I may learn this one day. The weather hasn't been to bad and there was this quarterback for the Denver Broncos that started doing some pretty amazing and heroic things, well that and his awesome defense and special teams - more on them later, and by later I do not necessarily mean in this post.

December - Saw the end of an era for one of my children, illegal drinking. That's right, Andy became a full-fledged legal drinker at the ripe old age of twenty-one. Talk about culture shock, and the fact that he can drink me under a table does concern me, until I look back at my early twenties and say "Thank God I am still alive." Hopefully he will be able to look back in twenty plus years and say the same thing. Jenni got herself an iPad for Christmas, I got a Kindle Fire, Benjy and Jessie got iPod touches, Katie got a Kindle... So we will be ignoring the rest of the family now I imagine. I am kidding, besides Maggie has used my Kindle more than I have.

Not much of a review, but it really wasn't going to be anyway, I mean 365 days is a lot of stuff to remember. So here is what I hope to accomplish for this year - which has 366 days in it by the way, I plan to write more and take more photographs - at least one entry of both per day on the blog, although the pictures might be posted once a week - I haven't decided yet. I also want to try to read three books per month, and write a review for each one read, there will be pages dedicated to these things, so if you want to just see my pictures look at the picture page, if you want to see what I have read, look at the books read page and if you want to see what those voices in my head keep saying, well just keep on coming back.

Together we are going to make 2012 an awesome year, so let's get on with it, okay?

P.S. - That is totally my artwork at the top of the page, it took me all of thirty eight seconds to make, I hope you like it.

A Cry For Help

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 21:00:00 +0000

So now that I am back from the euphoria of reaching fifty thousand words in a little over a month (not even the month of November), I have come to the realization (finally!) that I can indeed write a lot of words in a fairly short amount of time, but I have a problem.

Focus.

Or lack thereof, to be exact.

Oh sure, I can write thousands of words, heck even millions of them, but without any kind of focus, what good is it? So I am here to ask for some guidance, pressure, focus, whatever you can think of by helping me to focus on a goal. The goal of actually completing a complete story, as opposed to throwing bits and pieces of tease here and there - although I do like a good tease...

Like I said, I think I need some focus, so I am coming to you who still read these pages to assist me with this.

Should I write about...

A pregnant woman that gets bitten by a werewolf, while he is in human form, and then gives birth to a litter of puppies that are actually a kind of hybrid werewolf, in that they are only human during the full moon (or I was thinking even during say the 90% phases of the moon, you know before and after the actual full moon). I would follow their story and see that not all werewolves are the same, I figure I will have a good wolf, a bad wolf and a confused wolf - or something like that. I'm sure if I focused enough on it I could make something work.

****

The pyramids that are near the Mississippi River and that hold secrets never before seen by men in modern times. Yeah, I know that there aren't pyramids in Illinois near the Mississippi River, or are there? I have a story in mind that tells the tale of some Spaniards coming across these great pyramids and seeing that there is an expansive cave underneath one, they start to stash their gold and jewels, etc there. Or maybe I can have people from even farther back doing this. And then sometime in the early twentieth century an explorer stumbles upon an entrance to these caves and as he is working his way out of the cave, he gets trapped, along with the secret, by an earthquake that closes the entry off. Move forward to modern times and another explorer, make that a hiker/camper finds something interesting which leads him on an amazing trail...

****

There is also a story in there (there being inside my head) that takes us to a wondrous world where everything is just wonderful and idyllic until tragedy strikes (darn that evil tragedy) and ruins every one's day. This I will admit is very vague, and probably shouldn't be considered, but it is a beginning - not like any other beginnings, right. Yes that was sarcasm.

****

I have a tale of space exploration that is tickling the inner brain and making me want to share it, but like the previous mention, it is very very vague and may just be a little spark. You need sparks to get that fire burning though, so it's not bad.

****

I also have ideas about time travel that I would like to pursue more, especially since history has always fascinated me and I think that it would be interesting to see what would change if one could go back in time and change an event in history. Of course it will all go wrong, because what fun would it be to have someone kill off Napoleon before he gets into trouble, if you can't have someone else take his place that is even worse. So you come back to your time and see that you made things worse.

*****

I have countless more in there that are just ideas, even just a word or two that for some reason don't want to leave my subconsciousness, but because I lack in this whole focus thing, they never turn into sentences or even paragraphs.

*****

So my friends, I am looking for some help, and if you have come here because I shared this on Google+, welcome and please feel free to help get me out of my rut and give me a nudge in a direction that will produce results rather than words. Also please realize that I feel like I am standing here naked now, because I am usually a very shy person, and don't like to shine any kind of spot light on myself, so I am really stepping out of any kind of comfort zone I have.

I really, really would appreciate any kind of help..

Thanks,
Roger

50,000 in 43.

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 21:40:00 +0000

Okay, I love pulling practical jokes on people.

Especially gullible people.

Now is this nice, probably not, but it is all in good clean fun.

I just noticed that the font here on this site is a little different than it had been in the past, almost like it is trying to mimic the font of my blog. How cool is that? Talk about your flattery.

Okay, not really.

Guess what? At some point today, during whatever it is that I am doing here at this point in time, I will surpass 50,000 words in just forty three entries or days of writing here. That's right fifty thousand words. Amazing. I have nanowrimo'd myself in a little more than a month. Am I awesome or what?

probably or what.

Shut up.

Anyway, as of the beginning of this entry I had less than five hundred words to go to reach that milestone of fifty thousand, so somewhere in the next four hundred, or so, words I will be closer to one hundred thousand than I am to zero. I'm so giddy about this that I cannot write any faster than that of a crawling snail, which I don't think actually crawl more than slither from place to place - I honestly don't know.

Now for the caveat...

I hate the caveat, just saying.

There are a few entries where I did the writing before hand, but I think they should still count, so there.

****

Big plans for today the eleventh day of the eleventh month of the eleventh year of the twenty first century. We're talking partay for Jessica! She turned fourteen a couple of weeks ago, but because of volleyball, and Halloween and what not we decided to have her party today. I suggested that it should last until eleven eleven post meridian (did you see what I just did there?), but she has to get up and take a test tomorrow, a Saturday no less, so the festivities will be winding down around ten.

There will be ten teenage girls in addition to my one hanging out, in what should be an epic occasion that will be spoken of for years to come. Or something like that.

****

Yesterday I was bragging about my forty seven words per minute pace (did it again!), only to have slowed down to a mere forty three for yesterday's pace. Today, I feel like I might break thirty if I am lucky. This must be what it feels like to walk through molasses in January or something. I think I have used the word something somewhere around too many times in this post, so from now on - at least with regards to this post, there will be no more somethings - after that one of course.

*****

Did you see that I shared yesterday's post on my blog? Dis you see that I have had more posts this month than the previous three months combined? I think I am coming out of my no blogging phase, which means that you will need to stop by more often to catch up on the comings and goings of your favorite Roger, er blogger, er whatever. That's a cool blog to visit as well, very well attended and he gives good advice on writing and has quirky pictures of cats and all - which I really don't understand, so if someone would care to explain that to me I would really appreciate it. Who knows, maybe I'll start posting pictures of my cat more - and then get a couple more to have even more fun, if that is even possible.

*****

Well, I have now broken into the plus fifty thousand club, if there is such a thing, so I think I shall have to party along with my daughter tonight - we're having chicken tacos, that are so, so good. Dare I say that they are awesome? And easy to make as well. Here's the recipe.... chicken breasts (de-boned and de-skinned), chicken broth and taco seasoning (you choose; hot, medium or mild) and a crock pot. Throw everything in the crock pot, turn up the heat, and six hours later a meal has been made. We roll the chicken in tortillas, but i imagine that they will be just as tasty in a crunchy shell as well. Pretty awesome and easy, not to mention cheaper and better tasting than something similar from Taco Bell.

Well, I should be going now, I hope you enjoyed the visit, and like I said, come back for more later.

Pax!

11/11/11 11:11

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 17:11:00 +0000

That's a lot of ones!

What does it mean? I have no idea but I have been told that if you make a wish at 11:11 it will come true. Apparently that is only for wishes that don't include large payoffs from lottery winnings. Alas, I will make a wish on this auspicious occasion, is it really auspicious, gonna have to check Webster's to see if I am using it correctly, but I will do that later, after all I have a wish to make....

There, done!

What? You expect me to share it with you? I think that is against the rules or something. Let's just say it has something to do with all the insanity in the world around us and such.

Anyway, have a great day, and don't forget to hug a Veteran, which is way more important than a silly wish anyway.

More Phone Photos

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 14:07:00 +0000

First Day of School!

Maggie playing in the sunroof (no I wasn't driving at the time)

Bath Time!! Check out the Mohawks!!

Danny, Katie and Timmy

Our college junior, Andy!!

All the kids, except Benjy - he's camera shy apparently. Not really.

Phone Photo Dump

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 14:02:00 +0000

The Tronorail!!!

EPCOT!!

Windmill

Bulldog!!

Katie, Danny, Maggie, Timmy and Jessie in a pool, in the rain. :)

Clearing out some older photos taken with my phone, some Disney, some Batavia, some kids. :)

A Challenge to Comprehend... Good Luck!

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 23:02:00 +0000

So they fired Joe Paterno last night.

Yet, the idiot coward that actually witnessed the rape of a ten year old boy by a forty or fifty year old man still gets to stand on the sidelines at Penn State University.

I think there is something wrong with that picture.

****

Got our first bit of snow today - just flurries that didn't stick, but you know it is just a matter of time before they do. Ah winter, you gotta love it. Well, maybe not love it, but it is a part of life liberty and all that jazz right?

I am not on nearly as much of a roll as I was yesterday and I believe that my words per minute will be way less than the forty seven that I got yesterday, I was blazing! Today I am doing more of a trot, not sure why since I have about as much preparation and al in my head now as I did yesterday. Who knows maybe its too early for me to be doing this right now, but since I have already started there really is no turning back, right?

****

Blah, that's the feeling for the day, blah. I don't know if it is weather related - hey I like the snow - or what. I do know that I am making sure that I take my "Happy Pills" everyday, otherwise my blah would turn into a serious bit of a downer. I hate having depression, it's so, um, depressing. Seriously though, it's tough getting through a day when you really have no desire to to anything at all. I mean not one single iota. People look at you and think why that man is quite lazy, no not really, that man is just depressed and is doing his darnedest to make it through the day without ripping your head off or walking off the edge of a high building just to get the thrill of living back into his system. Granted with the latter, it'll be all over sooner than the former. Although you will have to apologize more, I imagine.

****

Ring tones annoy me, especially when no one answers the phone. It's almost as bad as listening to a crying baby in a quiet location where crying babies should not be heard. Of course I have plenty of experience with that notion since I have gone through several crying baby stages in my life - we're on phase seven, if you will.

No, I'm not complaining, just merely stating the fact that I know how it is.

****

How fruitfully bountiful and glorious - no, I don't know either, these things just pop into my head on occasion and if you bother to read it, well great. If you understand it, I have a list of doctors that might be able to give you some assistance. Okay, now that we have all of that out of the way, lets talk dirty.

Not really.

I cannot do that to save my life. If my wife ever wanted me to talk dirty to her in order to save my marriage, I think I would no longer be married, which would be truly sad and tragic, because I love and cherish my wife and family and would never want to lose them for anything in the world. No worries though, because I don't think she wants me to talk dirty to her anyway.

Just shave.

****

Random thoughts that will pop into my head, at random, will start appearing.... now. Dang, the mind just totally went blank there and I cannot think of anything, not even an abstract fart thought, which are usually good for a laugh or three, especially if they are done tastefully, which all fart references should be. Did you know that a fart is defined as a small explosion between the legs? At least, and I swear on this I do, that was a definition I read for it back in the days of me caring about what silly words like fart mean. And it has stuck with me ever since, so we are talking more than thirty years. No I haven't looked it up again, because well duh, i already know it. truth is that it is a small explosion between the legs, a small explosion of methane exiting the colon and entering the atmosphere and such. Pretty nifty little science minute there kids, aren't you glad that you stuck around to the end? Thanks.

To share or not to share that is the question - you will have the answer if you have actually read this stream of conscience rant of nonsense. I hope you enjoyed it, if you saw it, and will come back for more at a future date.

Pax.

Chocolate!

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 04:44:00 +0000

That's right, chocolate!

That would probably be all that I have right now but it really isn't much, so what I have done here is made the blog do the "dynamic" view thingy that Blogger has made available - it is pretty neat if I say so myself, and in fact, I just did.

What you do is ---- look over there on the upper left hand side of this blog, and you will see the word.... not sure, but I think it will be "Classic" which means that this entry will appear in a normal and upfront manner from which you can view the newest entries and then scroll down to the older stuff, in other words, classic.

Anyway, if you hit the drop down menu you will see several different choices, mosaic, magazine, flip cards, etc... It gives you the opportunity to see my blog through a whole new 'Dynamic' manner.

Pretty cool, eh? I like Magazine and mosaic myself, but I can see the pro's of all the others just as well.

Okay, back to your regularly scheduled life and I will see what I can do about being here more often and updating you on all the fun stuff going on = oh I will also be tinkering a bit with the design, so be patient, both of you.

Pax!

Another Random Party

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Wed, 05 Oct 2011 21:46:00 +0000

I was given a challenge once, well not really, but I took it as a challenge - to write a poem about an incident that occurred at work one day. Now that I think of it, I decided to do this all on my own and thrust it out to the masses... What was I thinking? Anyway, I thought that I would throw it up here, get a quick 250 word head start - is that cheating? i mean I did write it right? Besides the only one I am cheating is myself, kind of like counting your golf score as a four when you actually shot a six. Sure your final score will look better, but deep down, you know that you really sucked at that hole. Now imagine doing it for all eighteen holes... Although i am sure you will get caught. In this case, sure I got 250 "extra" words, but i have just written over a hundred to explain it, see how that works?

I have a story that I must share
about a man as big as a bear
He would often go off to think
and leave the room in a stink
Wonder not about his plan
while in the room with the can
He would use some water to drink
but never wash up in the sink
One day our hero came by
and started to open his fly
He noticed something replete
when he lifted up that seat
Like looking at a bagel from over here
he noticed a great brown smear
Behold the great man had left behind
something that might be considered grime
Disgusted was our heroes thinking
that he barely noticed that stinking
He did however have to share
with all he worked with there
By groups of two or three
they had to see that which was not pee
One brave soul even took a photo
of what that man did solo
To the internet he would want to go
but someone told him, “No”
He relented and didn't send
what could have made the world end
My tale does not end here I say
because later that Saturday
Three friends were helping to work
with someone that acted a jerk
He decided to share a prize
of which came from inside
No my friends we’re not talking a pearl
instead it was a photo of a swirl
So now my tale has been told
I hope that you were all bold
in coming here for me to share
my story of that disgusting bear.

****

Jumping into the fray today, I will tell you that it is Wednesday, and apparently the date, October 5, is the most popular date of birth, as in more people were born on this date than any others. Can you guess which one is the least? Doesn't take a braniac, especially since the date only happens once every four years. Looking back on this I wonder if I should have said day instead of date, because the date is October 5, 2011 and who knows how many people will be born today, especially since the day isn't even over yet.

****

Another fun weekend ahead - it's a three-day weekend for the kids, with a volleyball tournament thrown in. Yes, Jessie will be playing volleyball all evening on Friday, and depending on where they get placed they will either be playing in the AM on Monday - a day I have to work by the way, unless I become ill of course - or in the PM.I suspect it will be the AM bracket because of the overall quality of players on the team, however, they did fairly decent against a bunch of club teams in last weeks tournament, maybe some of that will carry over to this weekend. Once can only hope.

*****

I posted yesterdays 750 words on my blog, and got no response.

Nothing but crickets out there, let me tell you.

So I'm going to do it again for today, can't say i'm not a glutton for punishment, and for those that have read, or read my blog, I know that the Ode to Poo has already been published here, which is probably why I admitted to my "cheating" ways up there above the poo.

****

i am also thinking of swinging the blog over to using a Word press blog platform, because I think I can play more with it over there. Then again, I like it here and the few of you that do read it know where to come for your occasional Rogisms. So maybe I'll just build a new one from scratch, using the lessons I have learned here, whatever they may be.

Have a blessed day.

(794)

Oops! Forgot to Title This Thing

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 21:00:00 +0000

Today is being brought to you by the letter T and the number 6.

What a remarkable day today has been, first off check it out, I am writing my 750 words before eleven pm. Let's all stand up and give ourselves, especially me, a cheer.

Go Roger!!

Thank you very much.

Today was the big Apple iPhone five reveal that revealed the iPhone 4S.

i totally butchered reveal there by the way, twice. Imagine an "i" where there is an "a" and you will be able to visualize my error, because you know darn well that by the time you are reading this, it will not be there.

like I was saying; Apple decided that today was the day to reveal their latest and greatest. Word on the street, well at least on the Internet, was that it was going to be a new phone called iPhone 5. Um, not so fast, apparently they are huge fans of the great detective series on the USA network, because they did a big "Psych" on everyone.

Don't get me wrong, there are some new and improved bells and whistles, just not what the adoring public was looking for, and Apple's stock lost 11% shortly after the announcement. Wonder what Steve jobs is thinking?

Then again, what do I care? I have an Android.

****

It was a dark and stormy night....

There was a sense of love in the air as the two long lost friends finally came face to face with reality. Yes, they were indeed in love, and it was indeed very bad timing. You see, one of them had to die...

Why did one have to die, well because it makes for a better story and there will be tons of built up tension, as long as the author does it write, er right. Will the dude be all chivalrous and die for his love, or will the lovely maiden throw herself to the wolves, per se, and sacrifice herself for him? Or is it a case of them not really knowing that one had to die but that circumstances were beyond their control and one of them would contract a deadly disease that will kill him/her in the middle of the night, unexpectedly...

****

Chocolate covered chocolate is chocolaty.and tasty and probably not all that good for you, unless of course you are eating dark chocolate.

Speaking of chocolate, why do I have such a hard time spelling that word? Weird.

Speaking of weird, why do people seem to have a hard time spelling that correctly?

I digress.

****

There was a man that received a letter of great power, not a letter of the alphabet, but rather, an honest to goodness hand written letter. Imagine, if you will a Genie and his lamp, only on paper. There are always conditions and there is that fear about absolute power being bad and all, but this guy uses it for good - at least his good, I mean he is still a bit on the selfish self-serving, self-preservation kind of kick. So you know how that goes. Oh and unlike with the Genie, he isn't limited to three wishes, as long as he remains in possession of this letter, he will pretty much be large and in charge.

One day - isn't it always the case - someone finds his letter and all heck is about to break loose.

Not to fear, our hero has a plan and it might entail time travel, or maybe something as simple as breaking and entering. Anyway you should stay tuned because this bad boy is gonna get fleshed out and become bigger than anything J.K. Rowling ever wrote.

Maybe.

Who knows what people will buy these days, but I think a good story about love, redemption and evil will sell big time. And I have actually started writing it - go figure.

Like I said stay tuned.

****

I should mention that if you are reading this it is because i felt it was self-serving enough to share with the readers of my blog, that would be you, yes you. I should also mention that this is a daily exercise that I am pursuing, um, daily and who knows, maybe I will continue to post stuff that spews from my head onto the blog.

Now, if you are looking for something to motivate you, give 750words.com a try. Basically it is a private, unless you share it like I have, place where you can create whatever you want and develop it further or just practice your writing craft, if you care to practice it. I mean this is the fourth day in a row that I have decided to participate, in fact I am participating in a daily challenge as a way of motivating myself. I think I am closing in on 3000 words in four days, so it might be something.

Must go now.

Travel Woes

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 00:59:00 +0000

**** I asked my Plurk friends to give me ten words, I didn't tell them what I was going to do with them, neither did they. Below is the result, then ten words are as follows: Bedtime, French, Fries, Smurf, Yes, Snort, CHOCOLATE, Pork, Chops and hairspray. Hope you enjoy this little tale, that was inspired by true events. ****

I hate to travel.

Scratch that, I love travelling. I hate to travel alone, without my family. It depresses me and really makes me crazy around bedtime. You see, I cannot fall asleep when I am travelling alone and it really makes it hard for me to focus when I am on a business trip. It’s hard to be on your “A Game” when you only get two to three hours of very uncomfortable sleep a night. Imagine how you would be by Friday after getting the same amount of sleep in one week that you might normally get in one night.

Not pretty. Trust me.

I have tried a wide variety of ideas that have been handed down to me once someone hears about my issues. I love that everyone wants to help, it’s what makes this country great - too bad none of them seem to work very well.

One suggestion was to dance myself to sleep. I really didn’t understand this, but I figured it was worth a shot. So I turned on MTV and prepared myself for a dance-a-thon that would begin once the commercials ended.

Snort.

I completely forgot that they no longer play music on MTV, and the cheap radio in the hotel room, just doesn’t find a station clear enough to understand the lyrics, or more importantly, hear the beat. So I gave up and sat down and ate some french fries, and while they made me feel better initially, I had to spend a lot of extra time in the other room in my hotel room, if you know what I’m saying. Apparently filling up on greasy spuds, does not do my body good.

By the time I found myself in bed watching a rerun of Johnny Carson’s “Tonight Show” and dozing off to Ed McMahon saying “Yes!” it was well past midnight.

Somehow, I did finally fall asleep and entered the most disturbing part of the evening, my subconscious.

I found myself sitting on a chair in my bathroom spraying my hair down with some high-grade hairspray, which in itself is hilarious because I have been bald for the past twenty years, but I figured why not. If my subconscious sees me with David Coverdale hair, so be it. I didn’t really like seeing the grey hairs seeming to stand out and make let it be known that I am an old dude. Great, first I can’t sleep and now my subconscious is reminding me that I am old.

Beautiful.

It gets better. As I leave my bathroom, which appears to be about twice the size of my house, again I am not minding this part since having a bathroom the size of a small ballroom could have its benefits. The tub alone was like an Olympic-sized swimming pool, so I can get my bubbles and some exercise all in one swoop.

I have to find this house!

Since I like the other white meat so much, I decided to have myself some pork chops - hey I can control my subconscious every now and again, can’t I? I felt like covering them with chocolate, but my mind took over and literally yelled in my dream ear, “CHOCOLATE!”

So I decided against adding the sweet stuff and went for some mustard instead. I don’t know why I did that but did feel like asking my mind if it had any Grey Poupon. I figured that my mind wouldn’t like it too much and might turn me into a Smurf or something. Imagine that, being turned into a Smurf.

No thank you.

When the alarm went off I was not as rested as one might think and decided to bring my iPod along for the next trip to give dancing another chance.

**** Thanks Plurkies, we'll have to do this again, and again. I had fun! ****

My Name Is

noreply@blogger.com (Roger Miller) — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 04:05:00 +0000

Roger.

I write a blog - well sometimes.

I wanna be a writer when I grow up - no really, I do.

I just don't believe that I have grown up yet. Sure I'm nearing my mid-forties, have been married for more than nineteen years and have seven children, but I'm not really sure that means I have grown up.

So I guess that is my excuse.

Pretty lame excuse if you ask me, or my wife, or my children for that matter.

They think I have grown up.

So here I am, away from my family doing work for "the man" that doesn't appreciate all that I bring to the table - well maybe they do, but they sure have a funny way to show it.

This isn't about them though.

It's about me.

My blog, my rules.

Anyway, I thought that I would start up the old blog again and start to produce some product here to improve this craft that I say I love. I mean if I've got to work for "the man" my whole life, why not try to improve my skills so that I can work for "the man" that counts.

Me.

Bet you saw that coming didn't you? I can guarantee you that there will be things here that you will not have seen coming, but you will have to stick around to find out now, won't you?

So here I am thirteen months, plus a few days, before my forty-fifth birthday, thinking about putting a lot of pressure on myself. Should I do it? Maybe I should have a poll?

Maybe I should have a coherent thought?

This is what you get when I am away from home, in a hotel, trying to find a way to get some sleep. Well, and the fact that I promised my lovely bride that I would have some proof of writing for tonight.

A story will be here tomorrow, at some point.

Promise.