A Singaporean In Australia

NAPLAN 3 for Little Albany

2019-07-30T12:09:00.000+08:00

Time flies. Little Albany is no longer little. She is already 7 years old and is doing her second year in primary school. A visit to Angie's lately got us into the conversation of NAPLAN preparation, some test thing her son completed a few months ago. Apparently, they give little kids their first test at year 3. That means, Albany would be doing one in the middle of next year.

So what do I do?

I have never thought of preparing her for any sort of exams so far. Am I irresponsible as a parent? Perhaps. At times, I still mistaken her as the same baby who stuck to me like glue. I carried her in my arms the other day and went to a wall with some photographs of me and her taken between her birth and her first birthday. We went through it together and realised she was so tiny back then and the girl I was struggling to hold in my arms had grown so much.

I got curious and printed a set of NAPLAN3 papers. Ok. There were 4 categories:

Reading
Language convention
Numeracy
Writing

Since she was having a 2 week holiday, I decided it was a good idea to let her try out that set of sample exam. I was a little curious how she would fare, especially on the writing component, as I had never gotten her to write anything at that point. Needless to say, she wasn't enjoying the experience. She cried halfway through her first test, the reading component. I asked and she said because she didn't know how to do a few particular questions. I did the usual parent thing, telling her it was alright and explained to her I wanted to know where she stood and there was no consequence whatsoever to the results of her test.

The next day, we did language convention - cried

And the next, we did numeracy - cried

We had a 2 weeks break. What I really didn't want to see was her crying over a piece of blank paper during her writing test and then tell me she didn't know what to write. That would be a really tough nut to crack. I went through all 3 components on the day of completion and explained to her where her mistakes were and various methods we could use to arrive at the correct answer. I would only know how effective my teaching was when we attempt the second test. At least she still appeared interested and paid attention. So that was a positive sign.

When we finally get to the writing component I was nervous. Face it, this isn't an easy area for parents to impart wisdom onto. It would be inevitable I have to dive into it eventually. However, I secretly hope I wouldn't have to start from base zero - a blank paper.

To encourage her, I told Albany that I would write a story based on the same topic together with her. We would then exchange our stories and learn from each other. She seemed a little excited about that idea so I congratulated myself on the good idea.

So her test began.

That was the writing topic of the day.

Imagine my surprise when she began writing shortly after. I was lying on the sofa taking a few glances every now and then.

"Why aren't you writing, daaadddddy?" Albany soon called out.

"Erm, I'll write soon. Daddy is fast you know?" I replied.

I joined her 10 minutes later at the table. I noticed she had already wrote a page of stuff. I was very curious but I told myself to wait until the test was over. So I sat down and tried to do my side of the deal.

1 minute passed. Nothing in my head. I started to scratch my hair and looked around.

Another minute passed. Still nothing. That was bad. I realised I hadn't been writing anything. Anything at all. Not even a thrashy blog post. How long was it I wrote my last fiction, children story? It must have been decades.

I tried writing my first sentence. It was a simple short sentence. I looked at it and shrugged. At least it was something. I could probably build on that and try creating something. Hopefully it would be interesting enough for Albany to read later. So both of us scribbled furiously till the end of the test.

Albany's first ever attempt writing a story:

And my first attempt since ... forever,

We exchanged our stories and read. Albany said she loved my story.

However that night, we heard her wail loudly in bed. Upon checking, she said she had a nightmare. When I asked her for details, she said she dreamt of my story and cried at the "frightening part."

I apologised to her and told her I would use Anthony's name in future instead. She said, "But I don't want him to disappear too." I hugged her and explained to her it was just a story. That was a stark reminder how the words of parents affect kids in more profound ways that we notice. I told myself to be mindful and use that knowledge positively.

Till our next story exchange day...

Getting Little Albs to Buy Grapes

2019-04-07T08:43:00.000+08:00

Time flies. My little ones are 7yo and 3yo already. The little one is bold and sociable. Over the past week, he spoke more to my Airbnb guest than me. He would greet them with a resounding, "Hello!" and started giggling. Then he would tell them random stuff, such as introducing them his breakfast box and inform his listeners that his dad prepared that for him and other things that came to his little mind. The guests, especially the lady, seemed to have taken a liking for him and was heard to chat with him. Fortunately in this aspect, he isn't a chip of the old block. It would be dire if both kids take on my unsociable traits. You can teach and coach kids plenty of things. However un-sociability is one of the hardest thing to coach out of a child. For that reason, I tried changing myself to set a better example for them.

My little girl is shyer in contrast. However, she isn't shy by nature. I notice she is just a little slower to warm up to people. After that happens, she is very friendly. She can articulate herself a lot better than I could when I was her age. That is why I find it a shame if she might not be able to present her thoughts and ideas to her actual potential because the discomfort of talking to strangers becomes the barrier. So I tried helping her to be comfortable in expressing herself because I know how miserable one can feel in certain times or situation in life when one has things to say but has neither the courage nor the skills to deliver the message in the desired manner. I let her practice that by taking videos of her doing what she enjoys - cooking (specifically, learning to, at this stage). Some of the videos at available in my youtube channel Daddylympics [link] Go watch and subscribe to the channel if you are interested. I took the videos and edit them myself. I do not have any experience prior to doing the first few videos but it has been an interesting learning experience for me. Of course, I hope to improve the quality of the videos in time to come.

Over the years, there were times I felt I didn't do enough to document my kid's childhood. It would be a pity if they have nothing to look back on in future when they grow up. With this channel, they will be able to understand their childhood, as well as their parents, a little better as these little trail provides them the pieces for them to put together and interpret in their own ways.

For the past few weekends, I would persuade little Albany to buy grapes at a roadside stall outside a vineyard after her swimming lesson. We live amongst vineyards so doing the harvest seasons, there will be scores of these opening for business to sell their grapes directly to public and boy, you bet we are happy to buy. They are good, really good. You have to try them to understand.

Anyway in the beginning, I demonstrated to her how to buy grapes. Before I do that, I squatted down and put my arms over the shoulders and told her to observe what I would be doing and told her the reasons for doing so. After I bought the grapes, I pulled her to one side and gave her a debrief. I encouraged her to ask me questions so I could answer any on the spot so that she would benefit visually from my explanation as well.

The following week, I asked if she wanted to buy grapes. She hesitated but eventually said she was willing to give it a go if I were to go with her. So I did but I stayed behind her. She was nervous and soft but managed to buy her grapes after a struggle. Another round of debrief.

Another week passed. This time, I told her she was ready to do it solo. I gave her $10 and told her we would stay in the car and she would go to the stall with money, taste the grapes, choose the species she like and buy as much as what $10 could buy her. Upon the successful completion of her quest, she would be rewarded with $0.50 from the leftover change.

Eventually she came back with a tray of grapes. Needless to say, we were pleased and proud of her for trying. I asked her to help herself to the delicious grapes she chose. That afternoon, she dropped another shiny $0.50 coin in her piggy bank.

Got the Job (in principle) But ...

2019-03-30T10:25:00.000+08:00

So I rushed down to the company for the unexpected interview that I sent in the application for less than 12 hours ago. I arrived 10 minutes before the appointed time and entered the office.

"Hello!" called a voice.

"Hi, are you the boss?"

"Yes of course, only the boss would be working on a Saturday."

True enough, I looked around and saw an inactive office and he was the only person around. I was invited to his office and offered the seat.

The interview was informal enough by Aussie standards. It felt like it didn't last for 10 minutes before I was asked how much do I expect for the job. We negotiated a little. I felt I couldn't ask for the role because I was honestly out of depth. However, if I were to be offered the job, I would put in a good shift and ask for adjustments in time to come. That would probably be a fairer arrangement.

Then he asked me when would I be able to start and ended the interview asking me to send him some paper details and he would be sending my "contract" over "later." I thanked him, left, then sent him the stuff later in the day.

I haven't heard from him since but he did mention he would be away for 2 weeks. I sent a reminder email and stopped at one. Meanwhile it's waiting time. I am not desperate anyway.

Interestingly, when I left the company, I saw a Woolworths office in a distance. It was actually the place I had my first ever interview for a shelf stacking job in the supermarket (didn't get the job)

Ah, the memories. That was one awkward interview man. At least I tried.

Interview for Contracts Administrator Job

2019-03-30T09:45:00.001+08:00

Less than 12 hours after I sent the resume on Friday night, I received a call on Saturday morning at 8.30am. The boss wanted to see me.

Why?

How?

I have absolutely no idea.

I contacted Patrick because he has been in the contracts line for much of his working life to ask him to assess the jobscope. He got back to me and told me even he might find it a challenge to handle that jobscope.

"Then how the hell can I do it man?" I exclaimed.

He told me to go down to find out what the boss saw in my resume, with no expectations. Well, ok. I had about 1 hour left and I'm still here blogging about this. I intend to slip a pair of jeans on with a neat looking top and drive down once I'm done with this.

Good luck? I probably need a good dose of this. I know even luck is not enough to carry me through this. Pat was right. It is probably good to go down with a curious mind and zero expectation. I immediately feel no stress whatsoever with this mindset.

I have no intention to lie later on. I will be completely honest and tell the boss I know and what I don't (which is a large part of the jobscope really) It appears that he and his workers work even on Saturdays here, which isn't ideal for me, unless I enjoy the work adequately. Perhaps he just want to see if I'm more yandao that him. I think I will be but let's see ok?

Applying For a Job that I Don't Qualify For

2019-03-29T08:58:00.000+08:00

A friend from the past gave me a job lead. It was a contracts administrator role in a company specialising in cladding fabrication and installation. While I do have an idea on such products and handled installation projects of similar nature in Singapore, I know almost next to nothing what a contracts administrator does.

Contract administration was one of the subjects I fell asleep almost every lecture during my poly days. I passed that subject by memorising shit wholesale. In a nutshell, I learnt nothing. That is why I always advocate learning to learn. I am a good example why learning to pass exams is really a bad idea. Unfortunately dumb parents are still pushing for their kids to do exactly what I did. I sincerely hope for better outcomes for their children.

If I were to see this type of job posting on the internet 1000 times, I will avoid applying for it 1000 times. Simply because, there is no chance in hell I would be considered for an interview anyway. It is better to save everyone's time. However, I will do so for this job lead because a friend bothered to link me up with it. I have to return the respect by making the effort to do so, at the very least.

I didn't make much changes to my one-page resume. It listed my previous jobs and highlighted my terribly flawed career like a spotlight. In all honesty, I wouldn't hire myself if I were a boss. There isn't much I can do about that though, unless I decide to lie and fabricate things I didn't do.

The cover letter was where I really struggled. I couldn't even write a single line, just like what I experienced when I tried blogging again after a long layoff. In the end, I decided to do it differently. I wrote my cover letter just like a blog post, albeit a little more formal - less the vulgarities of course.

In the cover letter, I told the reader what I did before I migrated to Perth 8 years ago. Those few years were the only part of my work life that I gained some experience remotely relevant to this job I was applying for. I outright state I have never work a day as a contract administrator in my life before and I spend the rest of the space telling him why I think I can do it - in a formal way but it essentially means I think I am an expert in picking up things I have never done before. I ended up telling him I felt excited (I honestly did) seeing his company's projects photographs on his website because it reminded me of my projects in Singapore.

I think that's the best I could have done.

Airbnb: 48 Days

2019-03-26T14:31:00.000+08:00

If you are new to Airbnb's host interface, the dark green part indicates days you are booked on your calendar. I'm new to this too but someone from Malaysia booked our room for 50 nights!

That's highly unusual. We had a little joke the previous evening what we thought about it but at the end of the day, a joke is a joke. As hosts, we will remain professional and will not pre-judge any guests unless there is a clear red flag screaming at us. It is human nature to be imaginative and curious. Sometimes you wonder about things that are none of your business.

The good thing about this booking is, we'll have a clearer idea how we feel about people coming in and out of our house while we live in. Come to think of it, we always had someone with us for considerable periods here. So this will not be something entire new. The only difference is that this time the accommodation we are providing will be rated and reviewed. Not only that, but us as host as well. That doesn't feel so comfortable anymore does it? Well, it's a good way to find out if you are an asshole I guess. If you feel you are one, maybe you can join Airbnb as a host like me to confirm it. Tell me when your get your certification of truth. Haha. Then we'll all call you asshole. Ok, the deal is, if/when I do, I'll let you know too.

Another good thing about the booking is, the room will be occupied for some time. You don't really want your property to be vacant for too many days, do you? However, there is a slight problem. As we are a new account, what we need now is shorter stays so we can get as many (good) reviews as we can in a shorter period of time before our "new" tag is removed. I read that our listing will be difficult to find once we are not tagged as a "new" account. Unless of course, there has been plenty of bookings and good reviews. That is how the algorithm works in apps like that these days. Nothing new there.

So any one of wants to book a room in mid May this year to help out?

It comes with a plate of free Char Kuay Teow ok?

Throwing Eggs at Shanmugam

2019-03-25T09:40:00.000+08:00

Sigh.

I'm not sure why folks in the whatsapp group keep posting Singapore related news. Truth to be told, I'm disconnected from anything SG for more than 2 years now. All my life, we have been told Singapore changes are break neck pace. I found out later that only applies to infrastructure. You know, roads, buildings, stuff like that. When it comes to humanities, hardly.

Just a month or two ago, my family visited Angie's, to welcome them back from a long Singapore trip. After dinner, they watched some Mediacorp serial drama.

"Wtf?" I remembered myself thinking.

Well, apparently our friends watched that serial every night while they were in Singapore and that night when we visited happened to be the final episode so they wouldn't want to miss that. That wasn't the point I brought this up. I watched about 3 minutes of that episode not to find out what was it about but to see what had changed in Singapore since.

Nothing. I saw a familiar style of shooting and story telling, same accent and pace of speaking, all the same old faces, only with just a little more wrinkles. Nothing much has changed. I could have swore I that although I left Singapore for 7 years, it didn't feel like a day when I watched that drama serial with Angie and family.

The people and their ways rarely change in Singapore. Some random folks once suggested Singapore doesn't have a culture. I think we can't say that now. We do have a fixation with the way we think and run things. That's culture. Whether or not it is in a form rich enough to be appreciated, that's another point altogether.

So news feed by the most chatty group of Singaporean men I ever seen informed me that some dude in Singapore suggested he wanted to throw an egg at Shanmugam. Talking about the police in Singapore, I remembered years back when my sister reported my dad to the police because he raised a chopper at my mother. However, the police took no action because it was a "domestic affair." Apparently, raising a chopper wasn't Mens Rea enough for the police but the suggestion of throwing an egg at that evil serpent was. Of course, of course. You know what? Ask his wife to smack an egg on his head at home then.

You know, my mother is made of tough material. After all, she gave birth to the 3 of us. However, she wasn't as tough as Khaw Boon Wan, who endured a fracture more painful than going through labour. I can accept that, since Khaw is one of the Superheroes of Singapore. Each member of our Singapore Superheroes is infused with a steel hide that allows that to say the most embarrassing, cringey and shameless statements without flinching. So when Khaw says something is painful, you bloody well agree it is. If you are a ball carrying public doctor, tell him it is more painful than hanging yourself to the ceiling using fishing hooks. You may get your private clinic soon.

By that, I can't fathom how an egg is going to even make a scratch on Shanmugam, one of the Singapore Superheroes who can activate a defense system like the Israeli Iron Dome from his forehead. In fact the potential egg thrower should be worried. For he would experience far more pain than what Fraser Anning's had dished out against Eggboy. I guess the police was sent to protect that 20 year old netizen from harm. "Eh, boy, relek lah! Don't throw egg lah! Otherwise pantat pain pain lah!

Fortunately for the Singapore Eggboy wanabe, our caring police saved him. That should have be Straits Times' headline. What's up with them? Standards have dropped.

Oh by the way, if you ever visit the hospital that Khaw went to, help me check out how buffed the doctors are. They must have huge, bulging arms to be able to carry balls to such high standards.

Keep Moving

2019-03-24T20:49:00.000+08:00

If you are discouraged at this particular point of your life and happen to stumble upon this post, it happens for a reason. You see, I used to believe in coincidences. Later on, I don't believe in that anymore. Fate works in mysterious ways and we mere mortals more often than not, have no answers for events upon us. We like to call the most improbable ones coincidences because we cannot fathom the possibility of so many things happening at the right place and the exact time. Nonetheless, the purpose of this post is not a debate on whether a coincidence is a supernatural phenomenon or a series of cause and effect.

When I was young, someone once told read me a quote, "If in doubt, don't. If still in doubt, do what's right."

Sounds about right, until I grew up to realise not all smart-sounding quotable quotes are wise. In fact, many are actually fundamentally stupid. The one above is one. If in doubt, don't. Don't what? Don't proceed? Don't stop? Don't doubt? Do what's right? What's right to whom? Who decides what's right? If you ask me, the doubtful are usually not in the right frame of mind to decide what is right most of the time. I think I am the best person to tell you this and I write this post to remind myself - and you - to keep moving, doubt or not doubt.

There is this quote from Jung, 1969, that there is no linear evolution; there is only the circumambulation of the self..." June had this idea that each and everyone of us has a potential, future self in a form of everything we could be. That is not the same as saying we could be anything we want. I don't believe in that. In fact, that sounds like a line straight from the snowflake generation, many of which follow a similar sort of mantra only to fall into great disappointment and left uninspired, demotivated and broken. Well, we need to understand the difference between being anything we want to be and anything we can be. The former involves the breaking of limits and often - depending on what you envisage to be - include limits way beyond the realms of possibility. The latter focus on fulfilling our potential, that itself involves the breaking of limits because the journey to our maximum potential is extremely difficult itself.

That is why this insight allows us to focus on ourselves, instead of comparing ourselves to external variables. It gives us the stability of the mind to concentrate on fixing what has broke and building new blocks to stand on and new steps to climb. Our full potential manifest itself through tiny blocks in the form of tiny moments to moments, like an animation, in our present life. It does so by making us interested in things. These things would guide us along the path to lead us to maximal development.

However, we have to understand that human being naturally suck at doing new things. We look like complete fools when we try to do something new. The older we are, the most idiotic we look. Have you ever taught an elderly how to use a smart phone? Did you remember wondering why he or she was struggling to simple concepts that felt like fish to water to you?

In any tarot cards deck, The Fool is numbered 0 in the deck. It represents unlimited potential. That is our position whenever we try to learn something new. To grow, it is paramount to adapt to constantly being the fool, for it is easy to mistaken the honing of certain skills for the plateaus we are moving on for a longest time.

When we take the role of a fool, any idea we want to work on will seem to be a stupid idea and we are probably correct. The probability that - as we move forward in our adventures - that we are going to get it right the time time, is close to zero. That is why using failure as a stick to beat ourselves is the stupidest thing to do. One of most quoted statistics about failures is 95% or 99% - whichever makes you feel better quoting - of the business startups fail within the first 5 years. Moral of the story? Shrug, I don't know. I guess when someone quotes you that, he or she wants you not to give it a try. But you know what? For that 1-5% of the business that succeed today, they were probably part of the 95% that failed within the past 5 or even 10 years and that they never stop learning and be better.

Sometimes we move so slowly that we seem like we aren't moving. That is okay, as long as we move. Procrastination is often equate to laziness. Perhaps, when it comes to boring menial tasks. However when it comes to pursuing a goal, I see procrastination as the embodiment of fear. We should not sit around and wait for things to fall into place because if we do not move along, learn and grow, we will be too stupid to even realise when we have gotten things right. Even if the perfect opportunity manifested itself to us, in our unfulfilled form, the chance that we would recognise it, is close to zero. We might even think it is the worst possible idea we ever heard of. All being said, it is better to do things badly then not doing anything at all. It is never to late to start that journey.

When I was stuck and seemingly trapped in a viscous cycle, I sent messages to people of the past and one of them I knew via this blog long ago, Liz, replied and told me she 'didn't do well' because the plans she told me about a few years back has not materialised because 'she doesn't have enough capital.' She made it sound things were trapped in square one until she told me about her sending herself to a goat grooming course. There she learnt the basics of giving care to goats, which will one day be invaluable when she finally buys her first batch of goats in her future ranch in Malaysia.

She reminded me to take small steps towards my goals. Most importantly, never to stop because walls and chasms are expected in any journeys worth embarking on. These obstacles are the manifestation of the limits of our potentials meant to be broken to unlock the part of us we never know.

It is okay to look like a fool. For that is the way we are created to learn. Keep moving. Keep moving. It is okay to be slow but keep moving.

First Booking

2019-03-23T12:04:00.000+08:00

We put up our listing in Airbnb as a dry run last Friday evening. Our intention was to get our guests from Singapore to book it retrospectively and give us our first review. Must kelong a bit lah, nabei.... if not how to do things? Everything law by law meh? Anyway, our guests really did stay over for 3 nights and we were happy to get their honest reviews. If it wasn't a 5-star review, so be it. At least we will have something to work on, right? So don't point a finger at me and say kelong ok? If you are so free, point at the court at 1 Supreme Court Lane, Singapore.

Our listing was done in a haphazard manner. The photographs were honestly horrible, so were our listing title and description. However, we had to fill those fields up first to get something up. If we were to be so stringent on every detail in the beginning, it will be difficult to get things moving. At least with a listing up, we can pass it on to the friend to ~~kelong~~ write an honest review for us.

Then the surprise...

Before we could even facilitate our plans, we received two rather urgent inquiries from real random Airbnb users. One was rather slow to respond and the other one actually booked our room for a night within minutes. I remember standing in the kitchen confirming with wife, "Huh? Someone coming? 2 o'clock check in? That's 2 hours from now you know?"

She said, "Yah."

Oh boy. So we rushed to get things prepared. Till today, I haven't quite make sense of how things work. I will write in detail once I get the actual figures. It was something like a base fee and + a few dollars for each addition person + a cleaning fee. That would be how much it'll cost the guests. Less some administration charges Airbnb takes away, the nett was something like $80+ for that night. That sounds quite decent but it was only because 5 guests would be squeezing in that room. It was a big room and could accommodate even up to 6 adults so it wasn't the problem. It was a test on how I would feel about the whole arrangement. Up to that point, I was slightly apprehensive but I tried to keep my mind open.

The guest only came around 6pm. It was already getting dark out there. I opened the door and greeted them. Technically I didn't really need to do that because we told them how to get the keys so they could enter the house easy. However, their fumbling with the lock and keys annoyed me a little so I decided I would open the door for them.

It was 5 black guys. I let them in and couldn't help noticing one of them having an extremely strong perfume. It's just me I guess. I am not a fan of such things. The first thing I did was asking them to remove their shoes like an army CSM. It's still my house you know and there are house rules, if not I would have to turn them away.

"Is it safe," wife whispered after seeing the guests.

I nodded and said, "Should be ok."

It felt a little unsafe to me, especially there was not enough time to change my doorknobs to locksets. So none of the rooms in the house, except for the baths and toilets, could be locked. That would be the first priority after the guests leave, of course. However, would anything untold happen to us that night? My gut feel told me we would be just fine. We had made arrangements to sleep in the backroom together. Should anything crops up, I reckoned I could hold the door long enough for everyone to escape via the window by slashing the insect screen open. There is an escape route via the Alfresco and through the garage that the people new to the house wouldn't figure out right away.

However, could I hold 5 guys at the door long enough? Of course. Because the door to my room faces a narrow corridor where only 1 person can engage me at a time. Obviously I couldn't take on 5 men at once but my odds are decent for a 1 v 1 situation. Sun Tzu Art of War : With regard of NARROW PASSES, if you can occupy them first, let them be strongly garrisoned and await the advent of the enemy. Thus, I position my bed on the floor just in front of the door. The first intruder who opens my door shall get his knees shattered by a straight kick and face landing on my elbow when he falls. Over-thinking, yes. But hey, it wasn't as if I armed myself with my chopper in the room or something okay?

The guests went out eventually at around 9pm, shortly after their arrival. Later I found out they booked a venue in the city to celebrate one of their birthdays and didn't come back until 5am next morning. They were quiet because I wasn't awaken by their entry. I slept soundly. I had no reason not to. Remember my gut feel told me the guests were good? I decided to trust my inner voice more sometime back and this would be a situation to prove it.

By 9am they woke and got prepared to leave. I called out to one of the guys to offer their breakfast if they wanted it. They didn't take it up. Eventually, we left house before them because the kids had swimming lessons. By the time we came home, the guests had already left. That was the end of our first booking.

The one who booked our room was sufficiently happy with his staying experience and left a favourable review.

Not sure how many "stars" they gave us in that review. We are still unfamiliar with the app for now. Guess we'll find out later. I was just surprised how quickly things happened, especially there was so many things still work in progress.

Merging Lanes

2019-03-22T11:05:00.001+08:00

One car on the left goes in, one car on the right goes in. It doesn't matter who is faster. As long as we respect this simple rule, merging lanes is a breeze to handle in any traffic condition. Hard to fathom? Yes for me, at least till I experienced driving in Perth. (Note: this isn't about traffic volume, it is about drivers' attitude)

When I first encountered how the motorists in Perth do their merging on highway lanes, I was taken aback. The theory of merging looks like common sense on paper but seeing it in motion felt like well crafted poetry. It felt so seamless, so natural and beautiful. It felt like the locals had been doing that since the beginning of modern transporting. However, I was not blind to the fact that was probably not a given in every part of Australia. (I'm looking at you Sydney) Thus, I am appreciating what I (can still) enjoy here in Perth.

In a society where merging lanes means bringing your cars together centimetres to a grinding incident, I didn't enjoy my merging adventures on Clementi Ave 6 every morning during my driving days in Singapore. As an average Singapore asshole driver, I didn't flinch of course - until the chap with his well polished car decided he wasn't winning that pointless battle and should back off and live to fight another day.

Things like that were moments of fun entertainment during the gruelling, boring drive. I also showed no remorse cutting queues to get out of the highway. Selfishness begets selfishness. I am not making up excuses for myself but I'm saying this as-a-matter-of-factly - I did not start out as a bad driver. In fact, I was pretty good. Technically I was sound. Took lessons and got my driver's license within 2 months at first try, with 8 demerit points where 6 unfairly given.

So you see, this is where we go wrong. We live in a system where our competency is defined by something quantifiable. That by itself is not a problem. The problem is how we qualify what to quantify. If you drive day-to-day in Singapore, you will agree that there are too many out there who should not be qualified to drive a car not because of their poor handling of their vehicles but the terrible decisions that they make. Decisions that at best, annoys the hell out of other commuters and at worst, puts lives in danger. Such things are rarely discussed or even mentioned during the learning stage, be it in theory or practical.

As a driver from hell freshly graduated from Singapore roads, I was quickly reformed on Perth roads in less than a year. The great driving experience in Perth eventually allowed me to see the enjoyable part of driving. A lot of that, I found that, were attributed to how you are treated by other road users. A thumbs up, a wave, a signal to help you overtake, being given way without a grudge .... things like that doesn't just make your ride, it can even make your day. I was even given a hitch TWICE without even asking for it because they could see I was in 'trouble.'

When my Singaporean friends told me the commuting situation in Singapore is irreversible, I do not agree. Once upon a time I felt that there was no way Singaporeans would get on the MRT train in an orderly manner. However, since I left Singapore in 2011, I saw a positive difference during my later visits. It could take a much longer time to develop great driving etiquette in Singapore but it is far from impossible. The first step starts from education. It may be boring but it works. It will take time, a lot of time, to bear fruits but it will be well worth it.

LTA, being the relevant authority, must take the initiative to integrate the scope into the driving learning program. The emphasis for safety is well translated into the curriculum but etiquette is non existent, despite that it holds the key to a much more pleasant drive for everyone in the long run compared to the millions poured into hardware developing and building traffic regulating gantries. Hopefully one day, our authorities will prioritise what is right over what is profitable.

AirBnb

2019-03-21T11:09:00.000+08:00

We have spares rooms in the house.

Should we?

I know most people will cringe with the idea of strangers coming in living with them for a few days. I know because I was one of them, especially I haven't been someone who is particularly comfortable in meeting new people. The prospects of being in the hospitality field seem doubly daunting for someone like me.

But hey, things can change right? I don't believe I am the same person 5 years ago. Neither are you. Some of us get better with time, some worse. It is hard to discern that, especially so if we are our own judges because we can be incredibly bias in our position. The easier way, I guess, is to remind ourselves to be a better version of ourselves yesterday. Logically, in the long run, we should improve. Difficult - but try lah. Ok no try. Just fucking do it ok?

So yes. Let's do Airbnb.

First, I am not entirely sure but at the back of my mind I remember reading somewhere it isn't legal to host guests via Airbnb in our HDB flats back in Singapore. Oh, why does that not surprise me, or anyone at all? Should I talk about that one day? It all depends on you I guess. No demand, no supply. For today I'll stick to topic. Since we took the trouble to go overseas to experience a different lifestyle, let's do something that is illegal in Singapore lah. Just for the lolz at least.

The reason why I have been stuck in the initiative for so long was because I was weak in concepts. Thus I have no idea how to convert our room into a guest-worthy room for that purpose. Fortunately wife is pretty good in it. So she bought the stuff and I contributed what I was good at - installing the stuff and getting everything in order. I also clean the bath and toilets. That's something I don't see many Singaporeans agreeing with me as a everyday menial task. For the idea of cleaning after strangers simply couldn't get past most of you out there. You know, after living long enough, I come to realise shit is shit who matter whose is it.

Why bother doing Airbnb? Why not just rent the room out long term? At least all cleaning will be done by the tenant until he/she leaves, wouldn't that be a better arrangement? That was one question I have yet figure out a convincing answer to. If I ever do, I'll share it with you.

So which of you are interested in lodgings when you come to Perth for a holiday? I can give you a discount you know. Perhaps a free plate of Char Kuay Teow too, if I don't find you too annoying.

Plant A Tree

2019-03-20T09:31:00.005+08:00

Back after 2 years and the first post is about planting a tree?

Why the fucking not?

Listen - when is the last time you planted a tree? Ha! Gotcha didn't I? You ain't planted no tree, you commoner. We all know only important Singaporeans get to plant trees while a crowd looks on, clapping with their strong arms they developed carrying balls.

In other parts of Singapore, folks plant trees unseen, unknown except for the barking supervisor, if he isn't hiding in a nearby kopitiam. These folks aren't Singaporean, they don't wear white and don't attract the same appreciation from the muscular clapping crowd despite planting 30 trees that day. Ah, I feel like one of these folks yesterday when I planted my tree outside my humble abode. My balls are heavy too. Where are the ball carrying clapping crowd? Not a single soul in sight, except for the odd well maintained Aussie lady jogging past now and then.

Ah well, never mind. I planted my Mulberry tree, water it, surround it with some bricks temporarily and cover it the base of the tree with clay stones (not shown in pic) to minimise weeds for now. I am mighty pleased that this has finally been done. Things around the place has been neglected for 2 years, just like this blog. So stuff gotta get done again, after the delays. So sorry to everything that look spider-webby.

There used to be a tree in the place of my newly planted Mulberry tree. It was a badly taken care Frangipani tree that decided to shredded its leaves during cold weather. That folly eventually brought it to its demise because the 6ish year old son of a guest jumped on it and broke it.

Why? I have no fucking clue. You tell me.

I was told later that the boy mistaken the bare stump as a sundial.

Hmm, ok. I can understand why people like to jump on sundials. I like doing that too. In fact, when I was young I hoped to be a professional sundial jumper when I grow up. That didn't happen to me and I wish the little boy all the best. I hope he doesn't jump on that sundial in the Botanic Garden in Singapore. That is a tough one. Though the nearest hospital is within walking distance, it wouldn't be the wisest thing to do.

Now we got the serious things down, let's talk get light hearted and let me talk about why I chose a Mulberry tree.

First reason, my mother-in-law propagated that cutting so if I don't plant it and eventually get it killed like other plants she gave me, untold horrors may happen to me. Second, we can't buy mulberries in shops. Reason being, they are one of the most fragile fruits you'll ever get out there. Their shelf life is non-existing, even as compared to similar fruits like raspberries or blueberries. Therefore I opted for this tree as opposed to the more popular choice of trees I saw other big ball Singaporeans in Perth plant in their backyard. Such as lemon. Ah, when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade right? In reality, when life gives you lemons, you share them with friends. Their lemons end up in my kitchen.

All You Fuckers

2017-09-27T07:16:00.000+08:00

Want to read stuff?

Drop Your Email

2017-05-25T01:58:00.004+08:00

If I ever write again and you will like to join me on my journey, drop your email in the comment box and I will add you to my mailing list and inform you if it happens. Since I have received quite a number of emails, messages via whatsapp and FB protesting about my closing of blog, give me a show of your support.

I will start on a new project should I receive 100 email addresses from 100 individual supporters. We'll see how many years this takes us. Till then, take care.

Update:
26/5/2017 : 30 emails received
28/5/2017 : 42 emails received
29/5/2017: 51 emails received
10/6/2017: 76 emails received
19/7/2017: 97 emails received

Goodbye

2017-05-20T23:02:00.003+08:00

Update: If I ever write again (it'll be elsewhere) and you will like to be notified of my new site, please drop your email and I'll let you know.

Something in my heart died.

This blog will not be updated anymore.

I thank all of you who has been following me for almost 6 years. Through this blog, I have received support, strength, friendship and ... love....

I can't be more grateful to what life and this blog has unexpectedly given me. Perhaps in future I may have new projects that may spur me to write again. That is going to take place elsewhere. Perhaps one day we will meet again in the internet, I am not discounting the possibility. Perhaps you will recognise me. Until then, if I am still alive, seeya when I seeya.

Goodnight.

5 Year Plan for X-Land: Year 1 - Access, Rental and Menu

2017-05-01T06:39:00.000+08:00

Year 1 is a year of planning and observation. I should also look out for frost during Winter. Since there is no real need for development on certain areas of the property, it may be a good idea to rent out portions of the property in the meantime. The real estate agent gave me a "very conservative" estimation of the rates to expect.

1) House alone without paddock - $400 per week

Even in such a terrible rental market (for landlords), $400 per week for this house is an absolute steal. I have no doubt there will be takers at this price.

2) House + lower block to the river - $450 to $500 per week

3) Front horse land only - $100 to $150 per week.

Therefore potentially, I could rent out the entire place I am not working on for $550 to $650 a week. That gives about $31k for a year. We don't need to be a financial genius to know for a property that cost about 2 million bucks, that is a miserable yield. However shitty that yield is, it is still higher than fixed deposit in Singapore banks and I get to feel sibei song. At least some 30 grand will be able to cover the operating cost of the land, maintain the place and even add a bit of value with it. Having said that, it may take a century to get a full ROI at this rate, unless the land appreciates in value with another (unlikely) boom in WA in future. Who knows?

So we cannot say this is the worst investment in the world. Well, you can argue it will be very hard to liquid this purchase, as compared to Singapore banks fixed D. However, the weakness of such an investment is also its strength. One can create liquidity with the land.

But how?

That is where the average minds do not dare to venture. Unfortunately mine is one of them. That is why I am doing this exercise. To mock at myself and learn. There must be some form of ideas that can give higher yield of the land that can be implemented from the beginning of Year 2. I have yet to come to it, sadly. This post is still about Year 1.

The area marked green is Horse Around, the rest to be rented out during the first year

Well there you have it.... let's talk about the land a little more. The flood plain boundary on the right looks scary but it isn't really that bad. It's just normal land when you walk through the site. The boundary is set by the water department to demarcate where they think a flood will happen on the worst case scenario. Thus, they will not encourage major structures to be built within the boundary. Land owners are free to build simple structures such as gazebos or sheds, conduct any activities or grow crops on it. During the "1 in 100 years" flood last Summer, the water came into the dotted area I marked (4) on the top right hand corner. For a flash flood of that shock level, it didn't affect this land that badly. Further up, the contours increased to 5m above river level and rising quickly to 8.5m. It'll take a massive volume of water to reach that level. Still, you'll never know. KL-J said ice caps are melting elsewhere. Hmm... seriously, then he should be looking for a land on the hills with a waterfall, not a land abutting a river lah!

The first thing that a construction manager does is to establish an access route. There is more than enough time during the first year of observation to identify the most ideal access routes. During the last few months before the end of Year 1, access routes to the fields have to be opened. On the first glance, the current one to the warehouse is illogical and will not serve any commercial purpose properly. So 2 new entrances to the warehouse have to be made. One in front and one at the back. The terrain leading out from both new entrances are not ideal and have to be cut and filled for to get the gradient more gradual. It is not a big scale earthwork project and should be easily funded from the rental of the property.

By the end of Year 1, Horse Around has to be ready or almost ready to start. The stable makes it a natural setting for the theme. However, the menu remains a problem. I have no problems designing a menu. Imagine I called one item on our school canteen menu "Chocobo Egg" The students (seemed to) love it and the item was sold out each time it featured on a certain day of the week. I draw my inspiration from Billy Bombers, which amused me when I dined there for the first time. I ordered "B-52" for the name rather than the food. So it is easy enough for me (and probably anyone else) to come out with names for a stable themed cafe. Such as, (description are not actual menu descriptions but to explain to noobs like you)

Entre

Pegasus Wings - same as Buffalo wings but I refuse to call that, that.

Haystack - Vegetable salad

I can eat a Horse! - Jumbo size platter, consisting of fried junk food.

etc

Mains

Trojan Horse - Cheese and bacon stuffed chicken, shaped like body of a horse with nuggets and potato sticks as head and limbs held together with Pocky Sticks. Cheese oozes out from body when you make an incision. I wish I can make soldiers dashing out to give diner a good smacking but don't ask for too much ok. Otherwise, fucking kick ass meal.

Dark Horse - Scotch egg (pork) on baked rice. Wish I can try that with a salted egg but I don't want to kill somebody.

Lead a Horse to water - Fish 'N Chips

One Trick Pony - Spaghetti Bolognaise, MY version

My Kingdom for a Horse - Mushrooms in cheese sauce on a panfried chicken chop with an intricate thin crust.

On the High Horse - Grilled Braised Pork Trotters with spiced peanuts

etc.

Deserts

Crack of the Whip - Rich whipped chocolate mousse

Two Horse Race - Double banana split

Unicorn Horn - Rainbow coloured jelly in v-shaped glass with evaporated milk on top

Hold your Horse! - Double scoop ice cream on cone

etc. etc. Too tired to think of a complete list. To buy a full version of menu .... please pay $57.

I have no freaking idea how to draw a crowd in. I can add items on menu and set up a decent SOP for the entire running of the place. The basic set up requires 3 staff to run optimally. 2 staff if business is still quiet. I can train them and even help out but I cannot be full time involved at this stage. Business better be good enough to pay their salary with access for profit. I wish I know how to make this work.

Rats on the Roof?

2017-04-30T19:57:00.000+08:00

The ladies at home complained of "scratching sounds" in the roof. So I had to enter the roof to do an investigation. Seriously, I did not relish a battle with a Rat King at my current age. My HP was also not as high as before and falling through the ceiling board as a quick exit wasn't exactly my idea of fun during my weekend. My ladder wasn't even high enough. So I had to put my ladder on top Albany's kids table to get high enough. Her table and chairs set was one of the best things I picked up from someone for free. They were sturdy, stable and built to last for a lifetime.

So I got up there with some Ratsak, bought from the robbers called Bunnings. It was hot, even in the cool Autumn afternoon. I was stuck at the manhole for ages, wondering how the heck I should move. I guess there was where all those obstacle courses I used to do very well when I was a young child were finally paying off. Those bookworms would be falling through the boards if they attempted this, haha! I could imagine the scenes. There were large conduits everywhere to block my moves and rockwool insulation to mask timber beams that I could put my weight on. The low truss also didn't help. Though I'm not exactly very tall, I am no shortie either.

Why was this area not insulated?

At times, I had to crawl through tight areas, groaning when rockwool rubbed against my skin because overexposure to these could cause a bad case of itchiness. I could hear the household from the top. Albany's exciting voice and the ladies chatting happily, cleanly forgetting I ever existed, as I struggled to get around the place.

No signs of rats. No droppings or any signs of life of warm blooded animals. I wasn't too sure if I really wanted to find some rats there. I placed some of the poison baits at spots where the ladies thought they heard scratching sounds. I would have to return to check the baits to know for sure.

The baits were supposed to attract the rodents to consume and they would die without a week. Sometimes, they would leave the house in search of water because it was supposed to make them feel thirsty and hot. So there was a good chance they would die out of the property.

Over the next few days, they did not hear any scratching sounds anymore. I wasn't too sure if the baiting works or there were rats on the roof to begin with. I guess the only way to find out was to make another climb and investigate.....

Sorting the Annoying Garage

2017-04-29T19:53:00.000+08:00

After spending an afternoon [link] moving pavers away and throwing out as much rubbish as I could, I was still left with this...

That was 70% of the initial mess but it wasn't anything close to what I wanted.

Like I mentioned earlier, I felt like being locked out in a losing Solitaire or Freecell game. Something had to go if I were to make any further progress. My bicycles would be moving to the new factory eventually, perhaps as a good aid slow walking folks to their toilet breaks. Until then they would be taking up precious space I couldn't afford in the garage. So I decided to move everything to one side of the wall. That was the only way I could begin work properly on the empty side.

I packed the rack that Patrick generously gifted me as much as I could, doing a better job than the Missus, of course. When my tasks are through one day, I'll have to run through the boxes of stuff one by one and see what can be eliminated from the household. I am not the slightest convinced we need that amount of things in the garage to run the household.

After one side of the wall was cleared, I made a visit to the hardware store only to find the high prices were not on my side.

That is what happens when you give a large corporate a monopoly of the market. Crappy prices for crappy goods. I find prices of many items in Bunnings exorbitant. Sure, I agree that there are goods available at great prices but if you know the hardware market well enough, you will be able to identify much more at cut throat prices easily. Fixtures and fasteners, for example, are some to begin with. They are being sold at a ridiculous margin in Bunnings. If I were to go with their recommendations, I would be spending hundreds of dollars to shelf the garage. Even a crappy fucking hook cost a few dollars. Fuck them.

So I decided to go the Pissed Poor Peasant way. For example, to hold my ladders, all I needed was 2 screws on wall plugs. For less than $0.50 (I didn't even have to buy the screws), I could hold my ladder plus my full weight climbing the ladder on that wall. (Yes, I bloody did that) Try doing that with your crappy overpriced hooks. The shape of the countersunk screws also held the edge of the ladder very tightly. These wouldn't fall even if an earthquake hits. See how the ladders look on the wall. What should I do with expensive hooks in a blood sucking hardware giant? Screw them.

Next, I spent loads of time walking up and down the aisles of Bunnings looking for a cheap solution to create shelving. No, there was no chance in hell I would be paying those money for ridiculous gimmicks. Bolt-less adjustable shelves for a hundred bucks? Hey - how often do you adjust your racks? I don't think most people even do that once in 5 years. Do I care if it was bolt-less or not? You think I cannot tighten a bolt? If they sell me a self-cleaning rack for a hundred bucks, perhaps I'll throw my money at them but not before that.

Tracks for shelves brackets, as shown earlier, was selling at exorbitant prices. A minimum of 2 tracks would cost me $25. A pair of brackets at $6. If I were to make a 3 level shelf, the total sum would be $43 and that was not inclusive of the actual shelf (wood) yet. I looked through every available solution but none of them were low costs. In the end, I sighed and decided carpentry would have to be the solution. The problem was, working in wood was the last thing I wanted to do. I preferred metal obviously, due to my experience with it.

Anyway, beggars cannot be choosers. I bought my cheapo MDR wood material for a total of $21. It consisted of 2 x 115mm x 2700mm and 1 x 60mm x 2600mm. I figured that was enough for now. I visited the "Cut Shop" in Bunnings. They told me the first 3 cuts (since I bought 3 items) were free of charge and subsequent cuts would cost me $0.50 each.

"Ok, do it," I said.

So the chap did it. After the cuts, I realised that they were cut 1mm more than what I required. Every single fucking piece.

I walked to the self-checkout counters, paid for my materials and walked out. $0.50 for each cut? No way I was going to pay for that.

I didn't even want to use fixtures to hold my shelves up. I used leftover tubes of construction glue left over from my laminate flooring job a year ago. The next day, the glue seemed cured so I put my heaviest tool box (above) on one shelf for a load test. The last time I checked (yesterday, after 1 week), the shelf was still holding out fine. So I know my other lighter stuff will give the shelves absolutely no problem. So basically, I spent $21 to create these spaces. I already find it too expensive. I should have picked up unwanted timber in nearly construction sites to do this shit. Unfortunately, I couldn't being them to Bunnings for some clean, inaccurate cuts.

Acting tough and rough .... then realised I'm a father of young kids

With that I have solved 1 side of the wall. I'll populate the shelves soon with my stuff. Two more sides to go before I close the garage task. This is taking longer than I hope.

Verify My Lanjiao Bin

2017-04-28T07:31:00.000+08:00

Showing a laojiao bin get things done quick

We have considered your case carefully and will offer an exception. We could do face-to-face verification over Skype. Please advise via email the specific date and time (Canberra Time) for the Skype :

Between (Office Hours) :

9:00am to 12:00pm

2:00pm to 4:30pm

Please get ready the current passport/ NRIC for identification purposes during the Skype. Once verified, please forward the current passport for cancellation plus a self-addressed registered prepaid post envelope to return both passports.

So this is why I didn't report to work at the usual time and better get my ass going soon. It's going to be a busy week at work. The call did not take more than 1 minute and it wasn't a "face-to-face" Skype call. Only the official at work was looking at my lao jiao bin, I didn't get to see her - not that it mattered. I just want to get the terminology correct. It was a laojiao bin-to-computer screen verification.

Fortunately, my lanjiao bin matches my application photograph. Therefore the executive announced that I passed! It did not take more than 1 minute. Guess having a lanjiao bin speeds things up.

The next step to do is to mail my passport to Canberra and get it mailed right back together with the new passport. It's like those chaps going to Vietnam to get a bride back - going to burn a hole in my pissed poor pocket like them. If a bird doesn't steal my mail, I should be expecting my passport this month and I will fly back to SG to visit my loved ones and the rest of you fuckers.

To maintain my Singaporean traits, I dropped her an email to confirm the verification has been done and the actions I will be undertaking shortly. Just in case. You never know... because even in Australia, pratas are available and can certainly be flipped.

5 Year Plan for X-Land: Year 1 - The Year of Observation

2017-04-27T00:45:00.000+08:00

This post will make no sense to anyone. It is not meant to be for anyone, just a brain exercise for me.

Initially I wanted to share the house I had the privilege to access and assess the day before. As a pissed poor peasant, it isn't an everyday thing I get to view a property asking for 2 million bucks. It had a beautifully built double storey house. I call that a character house and I doubt anyone who see it will disagree. It was the kind of house you'll either love it or hate it. If you belong to the latter, it will make no sense to buy it and do a major interior renovation. What a shame it will be.

Anyway, I changed my mind about posting the lovely features of the properties as well as the drawbacks that I saw. It is pointless and doesn't do much good. Instead, I'll take this opportunity to exercise my brain and come out with a 5 year plan for this land if I bought this land. That is a big IF but I believe strongly opportunities come to those who are ready. If I do not make my brain work and start learning and improving, I will never be ready for any opportunity. I don't care if I can afford this land or not. Eventually one day I will. It may be at a far, far away place where I can afford, nowhere near this plot of land I'm reviewing but it doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter. I'll get there someday or at least die trying.

Profile of land:

This is an unusual piece of property. Most of the time, owners choose to build their houses along the frontage. However, the previous owners of the land chose to build their house right in the middle of the land, accessible by a narrow charming driveway flanked by matured trees. The rest of the frontage were covered by two sections of horse ranches.

The second storey bedrooms overlook a tennis court, which is the last frontier of the land of that elevation. The land begins to slope gently downwards from the tennis court towards to river abutting the rear boundary of the land. The river level is about 5m below the highest part of the rear and about 3m at the lowest part. The risk of flooding is low but flood walls may have to be built to ensure.

The condition of soil is relatively fertile. The rear land has never been used. The ranches have been used to mind or rear horses in the past. The fields are visibly healthy with thick grass.

Facilities

A beautiful house

1 good size open warehouse

3 sheds

3 car ports

1 stable

1 borehole with 10,000k L license for 10 years

At least 4 large aviary

reticulation throughout the land

Automated security access gate

Year 1- The year of observation

No major earthworks or changes to the land will be implemented in Year 1. It will be a year of observing how the basic infrastructure and land works through the 4 seasons. Observations must be quantitatively recorded and analysed. That includes the weather, rainfall, daylight, sun direction, human traffic, neighbours, wildlife and the observation of the natural energies of the place such as falling leaves, wind, dust, wind droppings etc.

In the meantime, get approval from the local council to convert the stable into a cafe. For this land zone, this type of land use should be classed as Restaurant, where approval has to be granted to start a business. I do not foresee any major issue because this land is in a prime tourism region and the neighbours are running something similar. However, the council may have an issue with using the existing stable as the restaurant. A comprehension proposal will have to be drawn out in accordance to the requirements of the council and relevant authorities and changes will be made until approval is granted.

While the cafe should be profitable, or at the minimum breaking even as soon as possible, the purpose of this cafe primarily to get public to know the place. It takes time to get the word around, therefore this should be done as early as possible.

The budget of the project is $50,000. The conversion of the stable can be done without a builder, as changes will be functional and . Tradesmen have to be roped in to get the services up but the rest (or a big part) of the work can be done myself. The cafe will only open up about 1/5 of the land to the public and can be operated standalone. The cafe will have a country feel, with existing features of the stables preserved, such as half-swing doors, hooks and trap doors.

The exterior of the stable leading to the power box shed shall be cleared for a garden based on a permaculture design. The garden shall provide a stunning aesthetic as well as the full supply of greens, herbs and spices to the cafe. The cafe shall sit 20 indoors and 30 outdoors at the western end, overlooking the garden. There will be an area for children to play with toys or safe structures built with recycled and natural materials and they should blend in with the natural landscape as much as possible. The cafe will be pet friendly with an area for pets to roam safely.

The cafe's name will be "Horse Around," for the following reasons.

It has obvious reference to the stable.
The URL horsearound.com.au is avaliable and the naming convention makes easy reading as an URL
Easy to pronounce and remember, as opposed to a name like Maison Saint Honore (with due respect)
It has a double meaning as an idiom, which suggest an easy-going, fun-loving atmosphere of the cafe
The nearest neighbour is a winery with a wacky name, "Ugly Duckling" so why not synergise?

Menu - I am in two minds about this at the moment.

Publicity - I have no fucking clue how to start.

Flying 3088km to Collect a Passport

2017-04-26T08:36:00.000+08:00

When you receive an email that begins with "Please be advised....," you can be sure it was one from Singapore.

Please be advised that your new passport has arrived at the Singapore High Commission, Canberra.

According to ICA's guidelines, we will not be able to post your passport to your home address in Australia without first conducting a face-to-face verification. Face-to-face verification for passport collection is a mandatory requirement. (Passport applicants, including children, are required to present themselves in person at least once during application or collection of the passport).

1) The applicant will be required to appear in person (including children) at the Singapore High Commission in Canberra to collect the new passport during weekdays, Monday to Friday: 8:30am - 12:30pm; 1:30pm - 5:00pm (Except Public Holiday). Please remember to bring along your existing passport to be invalidated; or

2) You may complete the below table and email back to citizenservice_cbr@mfa.sg to be considered for alternative face-to-face verification via Skype. Each application will be assessed on a case-by-case basis and a consular official will contact you as soon as possible.

Both your old and new passports will be returned and no visas in your old passport will be cancelled. Please note that you will have to collect your passport within 6 months. Passports not collected within 6 months will be cancelled and returned to ICA in Singapore.

You are advise and encourage to eRegister with the MFA for your stay in Australia for emergency cases. www.mfa.gov.sg

For queries with regards to Australian visa, please contact the Australian immigration for more information. Thank you.

Thanks & regards,

XXXXXXX l Consular Assistant

Singapore High Commission l 17 Forster Crescent Yarralumla ACT 2600

T : 02 6271 2000 l F:02 6273 8165

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Please fill in the table below and email back to citizenservice_cbr@mfa.sg . Please note we will access case by case basis and a consular official will contact you as soon as possible. Thank you

Full Name (as in passport)
i) Passport Number: ii) NRIC number:
Gender
DOB
Expiry date (of existing passport)
Mobile number / Residence number
Email Address
City of Residence in Australia:
Address in Australia
Have you submitted an application to renew your passport?
If yes, when did you submit the application?
Was it submitted via APPLES or through the Singapore High Commission in Canberra?
By when do you need the new passport?
Are you traveling back to Singapore before your passport expires?
Please provide reasons for not being able to travel down to collect your passport in Canberra. (Pls elaborate)

Kaninabu chao cheebye.

Fuck you and your case by case basis.

Why does the Singapore embassy in Australia expects Singaporeans in Australia to travel all the way to the no-man's desolated wasteland to collect a passport? Hello, Singapore Embassy, wake up your fucking idea. This is Australia and that is the Eyre Highway, not Orchard Road. Travelling all 1660km on Eyre only takes me to the halfway point between me and your no-man's land.

And if we don't make that Journey to the East to retrieve our scriptures, we are under their mercy of a "case by case" consideration to grant us a fucking Skype call. Why don't they station the embassy at Alice Springs? At least when we travel there by foot, it gives us that correct 'feel' and we'll certainly ascend to the heavens as deities after we retrieve our holy red passports.

Yes, I know they will probably (they better!) grant me the interview but I hate the fact that they hold the right to "consider" and put us under a "case-by-case" situation as often as they can. I hate the fact I have to insult my intelligence by providing reasons why it is not feasible for me to fly to the fucking ACT to do the shit. It is the same shit that I moved away from but they are completely the same here. They will never change. Never!

Gathering Mode

2017-04-25T14:11:00.000+08:00

Angie is going to migrate to Perth around the 3rd quarter of the year. We have been putting aside everything from kitchenware, household items and children's toys for her. Each time we asked if she wanted an item, she would never say no to it. By now, we have gathered a sizable heap of items.

If you want to put it in a bad way, I am dumping my unwanted items to Angie. However, I don't see things that way. I believe firmly each item will go a long way to help her out in settling down. Be honest, don't you feel happy when you receive a goodie bag, containing a handful of diapers and other useful stuff for new parents, from the maternity hospital after your baby is born? How about a goodie bag for Standard Chartered runs in Singapore? I know of people who go for runs for that finisher T-shirt instead of anything rightfully else. Well, people get really exciting receiving a Fun pack pack at NDP. Therefore, I should be proud to present Angie a Migration Fun Pack Pack.

the good ol days with the legend

Angie's "Simi-sai-also-want" attitude reminded me of myself when I first came to Perth. Imagine, I picked up a gas stove and put it in Joanna's backyard. I couldn't understand her incredulous expression then but I do now. I picked up a really heavy couch and drove it back to my rented property on my 1995 Corolla. Children in passing cars gave me faces of amazement as if they were watching a Chingay Procession. I felt proud to share my Singaporean culture with the locals. The fucking Singapore embassy in Canberra where no living Singaporean is living should make me an ambassador just for that.

What happened to me and is happening to Angie is a phenomenon I call the Gathering Mode. It doesn't happen to everyone. You will be surprised it does not happen to the most Kiasu and Kiasi Singaporeans. Quite the opposite, in fact. These valued species in Singapore are the entitled version of Singaporeans who expect red carpet treatment from their adopted countries, walk into jobs, expect the locals to accept their culture and mentality. Sure, they love a freebie any day but picking up discarded items in public? No way! Scared kena somehow Stomped in Perth also. No money can but cannot no face lah!

There is nothing shameful about being in a Gathering Mode. Yes, I am a pissed poor peasant and Angie will pretend that she is. (but she isn't, she owns a car in Singapore!) However, this has little to do with money or the lack of. I did bring a sum of money to Perth when I came over. It should be sufficient to last us long enough before finding a job that can kick start a more sustainable life here without eating into the savings anymore. I went into Gathering Mode because I was pessimistic about my migration.

Yes, you heard that right. That is what set Gathering Moders like Angie and I apart from the other Singaporeans. Most migrants are optimistic about their moves, which is logical. Who in the right mind will move to a country if they are pessimistic about their future there? Well some of us do because we have reached a tipping point where economic reasons are no longer significant on the push-pull balance.

I'm not sure if I can considered myself settled down in Perth today. The Gathering Mode is still well and alive, but to a lesser extend. We have been doing a lot of paying forward recently. The kindness we have received over the last 5 years helped us tremendously. If I am unable to express my appreciation to friends and strangers who had help me in person, I hope by paying it forward, I can make their efforts to me worthwhile because I will be doing the same for the others in their spirit.

Long live the Gathering Mode.

How Making a Chicken Chop Impacted My Life

2017-04-24T14:09:00.000+08:00

Recently, I bought some chicken thighs from the nearby butcher. When I was getting them ready for marination, I realised they were whole thighs instead of the smaller pieces that they normally sell in Coles or Woolworths. I thought it would be a shame to slice them into smaller pieces for meals during the week so I decided to make "chicken chops."

I can't say I'm really good at this but this isn't rocket science and I have done it long ago, when we ran that amateurish "western food" stall in a secondary school. Though we weren't "world class" or even "hawker class", we tried our best to provide students of the school the best value for money meals we could. It was tough and we didn't have a fantastic first year but revenue increased steadily year by year. By the 8th year, we were easily the stall with the highest revenue in the canteen. Still, I wouldn't call ourselves "world class" or "hawker class." I don't think we were that good but we are proud to gain acceptance of our cliente. Outgoing students were overheard telling freshmen which stall they would highly recommend.

Most of the work was done by my mother. By now, she is too old for this tough work. Surprisingly, I still remember most of the basics despite only standing in once or twice operationally when Mum was sick. It was a daunting experience to be awaken by my frail-looking mother at 5am in the morning to be told I was the boss for that day. So I skipped lessons in university to go to war. I would have skipped lessons to play computer games at home anyway.... so how could I not help out if I could. My mother's revenue was the family's revenue.

Auntie (our helper) gave me cues all day. How much of stuff I needed to cook and when. My focus on getting food fully-cooked than be productive. A dent in our reputation would have cost more than lost revenue for that day. When I am fully concentrated in work, I am a wonderful multi-tasking machine. My brain can process a lot of information at the same time and my body (then at least) could perform and keep up. However, when I am in this zone, I hate to talk or have anyone breaking my chain of thoughts. Therefore, I do not work well with bosses who micro manage. I will quit a job faster than a bean sprouts should I encounter such a boss. I thrive in environments where the hierarchy is flat and everyone is working as a team. It was a rare occasion working in a kitchen without someone barking orders.

No greens because I totally ran out. If you are wondering
that was chickpea curry

The day turned out okay. Thankfully, I didn't break the lowest revenue record. The day's takings was among the higher side. NS didn't make me grow up. What I experienced that day did. All along I knew it wasn't easy for Mum to bring us up all those decades. None of the jobs she did was fulfilling. None of those were cushy, comfortable jobs too. However, she had done that for decades, so that we didn't have to.

After that day, I went down to the stall to help out whenever I could. I washed plates. I found that after you take on a plate washing job, (those without a commercial dish washing machine) you will never be scared to get your hands dirty again. It formed the basis behind my willingness to take on jobs that I would never had considered in my life, jobs that started my life in Perth. After taking on those jobs, working on flooring, paving, painting, insect screen replacement and other whatnots around the house became a formality.

That day when I had to whip up chicken chops in a humble little stall changed my life forever.

Annoying Garage

2017-04-23T14:08:00.000+08:00

Savvy Steve's garage does not look that messy. Unfortunately, this (left) is the neatest part of the garage. There are worse sides of the walls that are best remained unseen.

I found myself standing like a loon in the garage many times last weekend. I didn't know where to begin. Believe me, I am a great organiser and can sort out any mess if I want to. However, that felt like playing a game of solitaire or freecell, being in a permanent locked situation. Fortunately unlike in those games, I can add elements into the situation to change it. My current racks do not solve my problem. I will need to spend time (and some money) to install wall shelves to house some of the permanent items. It shall be be done flushed to the columns without encroaching into the garage space.

The far side shall be have shelving flushed to the columns as well. Only one side of the wall shall be lined with my racks. That way, I could free up enough space to park 2 cars in the garage once again, as well as accommodating the amount of things I need to house in the garage.

An inspection of the fence also confirmed the possibility of freeing up about 1.5 sqm of space if I were to modify part of the fence behind. It was an oversight from me, I should have gotten the lazy fucks who did the fencing to do that. However, I was too busy working on the interior back then to think about it. Fortunately, my experience in making the side gate will be adequate for me to modify my fence. I shall claim my 1.5 sqm. In a tiny house like Savvy Steve's, every inch matters. I shall add this task to the list but it may or may not be completed in Autumn. All tasks unfinished will be carried over to Winter.

Despite moving all the remaining pavers out of the garage, it appeared that was only 10% of the work done. Addressing the mess in the garage is harder than I thought. I will have to put in real effort this weekend or it will never be done. Well, at least I got started. The start will always be the hardest. Things will get better.

Autumn Tasks

~~watch a sunrise~~
intensively slim down for Winter (ongoing)
~~touch up the minor paint work issues around the house~~
~~help the MIL paint her gutters~~
~~erect a garden rack for MIL~~
~~complete the uncompleted paver areas around the side gate~~
address the mess in the garage once and for all (ongoing)
install shelving and racks in the house (ongoing, done ~~one~~ ~~two~~ three)
get a large wardrobe for the wife
~~engage M as my interior designer to spice up the house~~ (Jen taking over)
~~paint the planter box in front~~
convert the front verge into a dry garden

Winter Tasks

modify fence to free up 1.5 sqm space
teach Albany how to swim
work on the backyard
grow plants in front of the back room windows

Gassed Out

2017-04-22T11:32:00.000+08:00

It turned out that not all that glittered was gold, I found out the hard way. There was an easement placed on the land where Acres of Gold was. There was an important gas line across the land beneath. Though the previous owners might have not be disturbed for the past 30 years, it does not mean there will not be any disruption to the land in future when the need arises. Thus the easement clause in the land title and that does anything but to put one at ease if you are considering buying the land. KL-J's advisers told him to stay out. I had the same opinion. I wouldn't mind living on the land even if a gas pipe running below. In Singapore, we live above all kinds of shit anyway. However, running a business on land with easement is an entirely different story. If the easement is exercise, the business downtime, opportunity costs, reinstating costs and compensation will be potential headaches. Since prevention is better than cure, the best thing to do is to avoid.

Was I embarrassed for not spotting such a critical problem? Yes. However, it was the first time I heard of the term easement in my entire life. Much as I tried, I didn't cover every single potential issue associated with buying land. That is how we learn things. I am grateful for an opportunity to an eye opener rather than dwelling on my lack of knowledge. I learnt something from that and I am sharing it now for your benefit.

There will be always better properties around. Perhaps not at the same price or location but there will be interesting ones here and there. So it is up to KL-J (and me to a lesser extent) to shortlist new ones. Coincidentally, the one that he spotted and noted me was one that caught my eye just a minute before. It was a beautiful looking estate on paper. One that sends hearts fluttering. However, I thought it might be over his budget so I didn't suggest. Of course, I was wrong again. From the way I see it, if it is value for money, investors will not mind paying more.

The land report suggested a scary drop in land price in just one single year but it was still valued for a million despite the plunge. It looks like most people who buy land recently, be it residential, commercial or rural, will be sitting on a property worth less than what they paid for today. Despite the drop in land value, the owner is expecting at least a million more on the raw land itself. Is the stunning house, water licenses, boreholes, infrastructure, buildings and other investments worth a million dollars?

I'll visit it soon to find out. Hopefully my eyes will be keener this time.