AboveTheChatterOurWordsMatter.com | Bruce Pulver | Author https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com Sun, 17 Dec 2017 18:27:35 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.7.2 Adversity – A Strength Trainer https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/adversity-our-strength-trainer/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/adversity-our-strength-trainer/#respond Sun, 17 Dec 2017 18:27:35 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2996 Getting out of Adversity – Using it Become Stronger Adversity is often seen as an obstacle that prevents us from attaining something in life.  It first appears as a formidable opponent that will keep us from achieving joy, happiness and the meaningful life we desire.   It can however, if approached with the right attitude and perspective, become a place for tremendous, transformational, and positive growth, launching us to heights without it that would be impossible for us to see. A beautiful, majestic oak tree

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]]> Getting out of Adversity – Using it Become Stronger
Adversity is often seen as an obstacle that prevents us from attaining something in life.  It first appears as a formidable opponent that will keep us from achieving joy, happiness and the meaningful life we desire.   It can however, if approached with the right attitude and perspective, become a place for tremendous, transformational, and positive growth, launching us to heights without it that would be impossible for us to see.
A beautiful, majestic oak tree begins its life under great adversity,  Starting as an acorn (seed,) it gets buried and packed deeply in the dark hard and heavy dirt,  If not eaten by a squirrel, it lives to fight for the necessary ingredients to survive and grow in these challenging surroundings.  It reaches down to set its roots and pushes up to find the light of day needed to develop its base, branches and leaves.   The tallest of trees never gives up.  Its trunk expands and branches reach for the best access to the sun.  Even after it reaches its powerful size and strength,  wind, storms, lightening, snow, and other natural and man-made elements beat down on it.  Diseases work to rot its core.  Season after season, the mighty oak deals with adversity of its environment, but never gives up.  So the face of adversity makes the mighty oak ever stronger.
Many times in my life I have faced adversity,  relationship failures, death of a child, passing of both parents, multiple job losses, financial hardship, and more.  Each time, I try to focus on the key things I can own and work hard at moving forward despite the circumstances.  I ask myself “what CAN I do” and ignore the temptation to dwell on what caused the adversity.  There will be time for that later when I want to look back and reflect on doing what I can to prevent that adversity from occurring again.  I look for the smallest positive result from my work (something I can control) and  take each element of positivity, apply it to the next move or action and work to become stronger each day.  So, I have come to embrace adversity in a strange way.  I don’t look for it, nor wish it upon myself.  Instead, when it does appear, I draw on it as an opportunity to grow even stronger as I work through it.
Just as with the life of the oak tree, try facing and using adversity to grow and become stronger.  In the end, the lives there supports beyond itself is a gift to others (air for us to breathe, housing for birds and squirrels, shade from the hot sun, and even when trimmed logs for warmth in the winter fire.
Bruce Pulver
Above The Chatter, Our Words Matter.

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/adversity-our-strength-trainer/feed/ 0 2996 Ten Observations from the “IF” Responsibility https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/if-you/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/if-you/#respond Sun, 10 Dec 2017 13:42:19 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2987 Ten recent observations from conversations with myself.   Let’s get on with life, work for what we want, take control for the life we desire, and rely on our ourselves more.  We all have the power to set our focus, to move in the right direction.  When can take responsibility for our own thoughts, beliefs, intentions and actions.  We will then see our outcomes begin to move to what we want in life….  Give it a try and share your comments.   Here we go…

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]]> Ten recent observations from conversations with myself.   Let’s get on with life, work for what we want, take control for the life we desire, and rely on our ourselves more.  We all have the power to set our focus, to move in the right direction.  When can take responsibility for our own thoughts, beliefs, intentions and actions.  We will then see our outcomes begin to move to what we want in life….  Give it a try and share your comments.   Here we go…

10. If you aren’t willing to do something about your situation, stop talking about it.

9. If you want to learn about facing rejection ask yourself how many yes’s do you need and how many no’s can you stand.

8. If you don’t get what you want, maybe you should stop looking for someone else to give it to you.

7. If you think your steak is too tough, sharpen your knife.

6. If you see the glass as half empty, get a smaller glass and stop complaining.

5. If you aren’t willing to work for something don’t expect it.  If you are willing to work for it, get to work.

4. If you are not at the table during critical decision times, you are likely on the menu and can be eaten alive.

3. If you want to give your children something, give them the opportunity to work hard for something they really want. That gift is an investment.

2. If you worry about not having enough, in most cases, you need less than you think and you have more than you need.

1. If you can turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones, watch how fast you climb.

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/if-you/feed/ 0 2987 Leadership from the Inside-Out https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/leadership-from-the-inside-out/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/leadership-from-the-inside-out/#respond Sun, 30 Jul 2017 17:14:51 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2974 Great achievements are often attributed to a great individual leader.  We can easily make a list of military leaders who have led troops into battle against insurmountable odds and emerged victorious.  Ask anyone to name five coaches who have built a legacy of winning championships year after year.  Better yet, the History Channel and ESPN will do this for us with their “Greatest of All Time” programming.  We have a fascination with learning how these leaders tick and understanding their stories of what helped make

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]]> Great achievements are often attributed to a great individual leader.  We can easily make a list of military leaders who have led troops into battle against insurmountable odds and emerged victorious.  Ask anyone to name five coaches who have built a legacy of winning championships year after year.  Better yet, the History Channel and ESPN will do this for us with their “Greatest of All Time” programming.  We have a fascination with learning how these leaders tick and understanding their stories of what helped make them such great leaders and accomplish so much in the face of great challenges.  What we hear is often unbelievable and always inspiring.  As a leadership junkie, I am always up for a story about a great leader’s journey.

After sitting in those uncomfortable hotel ballroom chairs for decades as an audience member listening to countless live talks, annual sales conference keynote speakers and industry presentations delivered by great leaders from all walks of life, there is no doubt the stories told leave us in awe of individual accomplishments and inspired by the human spirit and uplifting energy emitted from the stage.

In contrast, however, the stories combined with the lights, the music, the energy, often the tears, and the standing ovations can leave the audience with a secondary feeling of inadequacy and if one’s mind is allowed to drift off course might start a self-talk conversation something like this.  “Wow my life is a mess compared to what this person has accomplished…”  Of course, this is NOT what the speaker nor the organization that hired the speaker wants as an outcome, right?

My current thoughts on leadership are focused not on the outcome or accomplishment of great leaders but instead on the importance of our own inner-workings and management of self-leadership or what I call “Leadership from the Inside Out”

Self-leadership demands constant attention and tending.  There is no performance review looming.  The individual and the manager are one in the same.  It’s easy to lower the bar and be okay with it because there is no external scorecard for everyone to see.  However, self-leadership, if well managed, delivers greater focus, clear intentions, specific actions and based on my personal experience, maximum outcomes and higher achievement.  Merge accomplished self-leaders with great organizational leaders and the argument can be made that those battles are won, winning legacies are created and more stage-worthy stories of success have been be written.

Below are six self-leadership concepts I have implemented to achieve greater results for myself often against what initially I perceived as insurmountable challenges.  I have used these actions to set my beliefs, to frame my intentions, to develop my plan of action.  The results have always produced greater outcomes in my life.

SIX INGREDIENTS TO AWESOME SELF-LEADERSHIP

YES I CAN (versus Can I?)

You must start with a YES I CAN attitude and keep that mindset always. If you don’t believe in yourself, no one else will.  You may need time to believe deeply in yourself but you have to get there and if you keep telling yourself YES I CAN then you will get there.  It is critical to maintain the believe that nothing will stop you from believing you can achieve the outcome you desire.  Of course, it won’t be easy, nor should you expect it to be.  Remember you are pushing yourself to greater accomplishments.

I WILL (versus I’ll Try)

Writing down the commitment that you WILL achieve your goal and keeping this written word in your eye’s view at all times keeps the positive message in place and ensures you have the re-enforcement needed to keep going.  There will be times when you see obstacles emerge that might seem insurmountable.  Plans will need to be adjusted and you will question yourself for trying.  Remember you didn’t set out to TRY.  Continue to say I WILL.

I AM (versus I want to be)

See yourself doing the new skill, having achieved the goal and in your mind’s movie that shows you with the outcome you desire.  If it is winning a new customer, see yourself closing the briefcase with the signed agreement inside.  If it is opening a new retail business, see yourself in front of the store front with a neon “open for business” sign flashing.  Go ahead and claim it in advance of having it by saying I AM working with that new customer or I AM operating that new store with countless happy, repeat customers.  Become the person on the other side of the accomplishment in advance of getting there.  It will be a fun meeting when you meet each other in the reality of your desired outcome.

I DID (soak it in)

Celebrate the success (even the little ones along the way) to re-enforce reaching the next rung on the endless ladder of your journey.  Many years ago, I decided to train for a 10k road race.  I was never a runner and had no idea how I would complete 6.2 miles, but I committed to do it and had to find a way.  I started the first day of training at the end of my driveway.  My first goal was to get to the neighbor’s mailbox (100 feet away), then the next one, and so on. Before long, I was running a mile, then two then four.  The race that seemed out of reach was achievable and the little successes were many along the way.  Yes I celebrated that first mailbox with a huge fist pump and did the same crossing the finish line of the race a few months later.

I REVISE (no autopilot)

Every accomplishment has its unique set of circumstances, ingredients, timing, and other characteristics as part of it.  We must always take as much as possible from every endeavor (win or lose) and use this knowledge going forward.  We must also stay keenly aware that every new challenge will be somewhat different, even if we are in a role where we repeat as much as possible or leverage a process.  I have learned in my sales experience that no deal is won the same way twice.  Review and revise as part of the self-leadership process.  This will serve you well.

I REPEAT and REUSE (and we have a good habit)

When you are ready to go after the next opportunity or challenge, take what worked for you and reuse it.  Self-leadership is transferable to any situation. Use it to lower your golf handicap, learn a new language, start a new business/career, build stronger relationships, etc.

Great leaders give us some much inspiration.  Their accomplishments motivate us to be better, to do more, to chase the impossible, to get stronger, work harder, serve our customers better and work as a team to reach new heights of performance. The BEST leaders recognize great self-leaders and create environments for collective GREATNESS.

Let’s focus on our Self-Leadership and watch what happens with our personal possibilities!

LEAD ON!

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/leadership-from-the-inside-out/feed/ 0 2974 16 Days to LAUNCH – Special Word for Each Day – PERSEVERANCE https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/16-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-perseverance/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/16-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-perseverance/#respond Tue, 17 Nov 2015 20:39:17 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2934 On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site. This week we visit the Walker School in Marietta, GA to

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]]> On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site.

This week we visit the Walker School in Marietta, GA to speak about writing and the POWER of WORDS.  This year’s theme for the school is PERSEVERANCE.  Wrote this for Friday’s talk as my gift the the School  SHHH! it’s a surprise.  Ingredients of PERSEVERANCE are:

  • P ositivity
  • E nergy
  • R espect
  • S ervice
  • E mpathy
  • V igor
  • E nthusiasm
  • R everence
  • A ttitude
  • N urturing
  • C are for self and others
  • E xpecting the Best

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/16-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-perseverance/feed/ 0 2934 17 Days to LAUNCH – Special Word for Each Day – Third Day https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/17-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-third-day/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/17-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-third-day/#respond Sun, 15 Nov 2015 21:53:21 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2931 On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In Celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site. You are SPECACULAR S ensational P erfectly assembled E xceptionally gifted

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]]> On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In Celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site.

You are SPECACULAR

  • S ensational
  • P erfectly assembled
  • E xceptionally gifted
  • C omplete
  • T alented
  • A stonishing
  • C apable
  • U nstoppable
  • L oveable as you are
  • A stounding
  • R eady to Succeed

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/17-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-third-day/feed/ 0 2931 18 Days to LAUNCH – Special Word for Each Day – Second Day https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/18-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-second-day/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/18-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-second-day/#respond Sat, 14 Nov 2015 21:39:49 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2927 On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In Celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site. The road ahead will certainly have tough spots. Remember and know

The post 18 Days to LAUNCH – Special Word for Each Day – Second Day appeared first on AboveTheChatterOurWordsMatter.com | Bruce Pulver | Author.

]]> On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In Celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site.

The road ahead will certainly have tough spots. Remember and know that you are TOUGHER!

  • T oo determined
  • O h so LOVED
  • U nshakably stong
  • G reater than your challenges
  • H ave GOD in your corner
  • E xpect to overcome adversity
  • R efuse to quit

Written for Kappy Powell fighting a tough road right now.

11/14/2015

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/18-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day-second-day/feed/ 0 2927 19 Days to LAUNCH – Special Word for Each Day https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/19-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/19-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day/#respond Fri, 13 Nov 2015 20:46:58 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2920 On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In Celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site. Okay first up, EMBRACE your gifts E mpowered (batteries included) M ade

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]]> On 12/1/2015,  Above the Chatter, Our Words Matter will launch and be available from Local, Regional, and National Bookstores and at all major on-line book sites.  In Celebration,  I am posting a new motivational word each day from now until LAUNCH day.  If the word of the day, touches you, please forward, share, re-tweet to your friends and encourage them to check out the book at their favorite book store location or on-line site.

Okay first up, EMBRACE your gifts

  • E mpowered (batteries included)
  • M ade to be nurtured
  • B reath-taking when used
  • R emarkably unique
  • A ssemble and ready to use
  • C apable of changing the world
  • E xceptionally yours

11/13/2015

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/19-days-to-launch-special-word-for-each-day/feed/ 0 2920 Words TRULY Matter – Readers’ Messages https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/words-truly-matter-readers-messages/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/words-truly-matter-readers-messages/#respond Fri, 06 Nov 2015 16:38:27 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2879 “Bruce Pulver this is the most amazing book!!! And yours was easy because it was YOUR legacy.” Tammy Kling “The words in the book are ‘Medicine on a Page'” Christine W “Your book will be a constant inspiration to others that are searching for meaning in a time of despair. Kudos to you for sharing what you learned and helping others to find their way.” Tammy G “Bruce, your book could not have come to me at a better time. My family and I are

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]]> “Bruce Pulver this is the most amazing book!!! And yours was easy because it was YOUR legacy.”

Tammy Kling

“The words in the book are ‘Medicine on a Page'”

Christine W

“Your book will be a constant inspiration to others that are searching for meaning in a time of despair. Kudos to you for sharing what you learned and helping others to find their way.”

Tammy G

“Bruce, your book could not have come to me at a better time. My family and I are going through some very trying times.  I think God put you in my way for a reason, thanks again.”

Modesto G

“This is a fantastic book!  It will be one I will re-read over and over because of the inspiration of the messages throughout the book.  Teaching can be so rewarding and I am blessed with an amazing school, staff, and students.  That’s probably why after 34 years, I can say that I still love my job.  Unfortunately there are some challenging students as well and I am continually looking for inspiration to deal with the issues and discord they bring to our school. Thanks Bruce for your words!”

Kendall K

“What Bruce has created is inspiring.  Anyone who loved ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ will enjoy this book”

Doug V

“Through your messages, I got to see how your program works, and I knew with all confidence, that the writer was doing what he was recommending.   Many days,  I’d read your words, in the earliest part of the day, and I’d say, yes.  Yes to being somebody with a positive attitude.  Yes to bouncing back.  Yes to being the great person God created me to be, who can shine above current circumstances to do my best work on this day.  I can’t tell you how much impact those daily messages  had for me.   I‘d pick up your message and  it was just like a train ride being offered – to a much better day than I’d have otherwise.  Mindset is everything.  Neuroscience research confirms it seemingly daily.”
Melissa G

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/words-truly-matter-readers-messages/feed/ 0 2879 5 Ways to Stop Sabotaging Our Outcomes https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/5-ways-to-stop-sabotaging-our-outcomes/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/5-ways-to-stop-sabotaging-our-outcomes/#respond Thu, 17 Sep 2015 11:50:39 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2887 Kick But We can have great ideas and aspirations. We can even have great motivation to achieve a goal or make the change needed to accomplish something. What makes these flashes of inspiration often flame out leaving us disappointed, discouraged and often less determined when the next spark of a great thought hits us? We must remove the word “but” from our vocabulary. Change “Yes, but I’ve never done that before” and “Yes, but I’m no good at that” immediately with “Yes I can get

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]]> Kick But
We can have great ideas and aspirations. We can even have great motivation to achieve a goal or make the change needed to accomplish something. What makes these flashes of inspiration often flame out leaving us disappointed, discouraged and often less determined when the next spark of a great thought hits us? We must remove the word “but” from our vocabulary. Change “Yes, but I’ve never done that before” and “Yes, but I’m no good at that” immediately with “Yes I can get that done” and “Yes I will”. Kick “but” out of our life

Stop Trying
There is a Classic Star Wars scene with Luke Skywalker unlearning what he has learned to prepare for his inevitable encounter with destiny. Yoda said there is no try, there is only Do or Not Do. When we say we will try to do something, we have an “out” and a lack of total commitment. To say “I’ll try” sets the thoughts to the possibility of failure. Never a good way to start anything worthwhile. Stop trying and start doing.

Quit Comparing
When we shop, sure it is good to compare price and quality. When considering choices we are thoughtful about making, of course we should compare our options. When it comes to putting ourselves in a growth or challenging position, stay focused on our progress to the goal nothing else.
Compare and contrast, we might come in last. Focus on me and no telling what we can be.

Eliminate Limits
Most limits are for protection right? Speed limits on the road. height limits for bridge overpasses, tire pressure on our car. The is no place for putting limits on ourselves or what we can accomplish. Limits are for dimwits. Think MORE and we will SOAR.

Turn down the Tension
Guitar and Piano strings need tension to be in time. We don’t. Straps on cargo beds need tension. Tennis court nets need tension. When in tense situations, go to our relaxation techniques. Breathe, calm ourselves from the inside out and let the situation own the tension not us.

These small changes will make a big difference in our performance and ultimately our outcomes.

Bruce Pulver
9/17/2015

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/5-ways-to-stop-sabotaging-our-outcomes/feed/ 0 2887 ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/rock-paper-scissors/ https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/rock-paper-scissors/#respond Mon, 24 Aug 2015 15:40:09 +0000 https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/?p=2790 What a game! We have all played it at one time or another, right? It is a classic way to determine so many things. Who goes first in picking kickball teams at school, who is chosen to read aloud in class, and who has to do the dishes after dinner. The rules are simple, on the count of three each person puts out his/her hand in the shape of the desired item Rock = closed fist, Paper = hand with palm down fingers extended, Scissors

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]]> rock-scissors

What a game! We have all played it at one time or another, right? It is a classic way to determine so many things. Who goes first in picking kickball teams at school, who is chosen to read aloud in class, and who has to do the dishes after dinner. The rules are simple, on the count of three each person puts out his/her hand in the shape of the desired item Rock = closed fist, Paper = hand with palm down fingers extended, Scissors = two fingers imitating a cutting motion. Winners are determined by Rock dulls Scissors, Paper covers Rock and Scissors cuts Paper.

Have you ever looked at the relationship to these items in a different light? How about in a way to drive to your goals and visualize the importance of your focus and your actions?

Here is a simple idea where Rock, Paper, and Scissors can keep us on track.

The Rock is a sign of strength. It can hold something in place and keep it from moving in an unintended direction. Rocks are used as foundations. THINK about the Pyramids, the Great Wall of China and Stonehenge as examples. Certainly, we must be strong and focused on the journey to reach new goals.

The Paper is where we can put our thoughts, express ourselves and create pictures or a thousand words. Paper is where the first notation of modern music was captured, the first maps of our worlds created and the most beautiful words assembled through prose and poems. As we seek to improve ourselves by setting our sites on higher levels of performance or changes we wish to see on our lives. Writing our goals on paper has always been a recommended way to make them real for ourselves.

The Scissors can symbolize a tool or the act of cutting out aspects of our life that are preventing us from getting on our desired path. Negative thinking, choices inconsistent with our goals, and anything we need to “cut loose” that is holding us back. Scissors can also trim the unnecessary or distracting and leave what is important.

So this simple game can help us focus on three keys for attacking and pursing our goals in whatever areas we choose. Rock, use it as your strength, Paper is your canvas to state your goals in clear and vibrant messages of words or pictures, and Scissors makes sure you keep your environment (physical and mental) lean, trim and focused on only what is required while leaving the unnecessary or distracting influences behind.

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]]> https://abovethechatterourwordsmatter.com/rock-paper-scissors/feed/ 0 2790