Absolute Peach

League 2 Anyone?

2011-08-17T13:40:00.001-07:00

Is it me or was that just a completely underwhelming Premier League opening weekend. Is it always like that? I can’t recall I think Sky has distorted my memory. Didn’t we only use to get the league table after 3 games? Why do we need instant gratification? Sky's gradual build up from the start of summer accelerates throuhout reaching it’s crescendo on the opening weekend. The hype is so much so that it’s almost guaranteed to be an absolute belter. I suppose it’s like English’s summers it’s always better in years gone by or so that charlatan Michael Fish would have you believe. In truth I was left distinctly short changed. I’m sure it was better last year? It was, wasn’t it Michael? ‘Yea it was great last year’ I thought so.

Regular as clock-work I’ll receive a text shortly after Match of the Day has finished and the Football league round up commences. A long the lines of ‘you watching this? It’s real football’ I never am as I don’t have the inclination and it’s way past my bedtime. But I think I might start watching it or at the very least sky plus it. Apparently it’s end to end with plenty of goals. What more do you want out of a game of football? Not a lot I suppose.

I must confess I’m growing tried of the add ons you get in the PL, Diving, cheating, simulation call it what you like it’s all got boring a long while ago. I’m not just referring to the Barton / Gervinho incident but we might as well start there. More than anything I was left bemused by the whole charade. Barton couldn’t wait to register his displeasure ranting about cheats on twitter. Excusing his actions of collapsing under no duress with the retort ‘if I hadn’t gone down the ref wouldn’t have know’ The irony that Gevinino was perhaps trying to do the same as he went down claiming a penalty was probably lost on the Liverpudlian philosopher. The problem is the FA will charge both teams for failing to control their players. But in my opinion the melee that followed is not the issue. If that 20 man ‘coming together’ happens after Barton came through the back of Song, who in turn stamped on Barton, then fine. These incidents are going to happen in football it’s fast paced, tackles are mistimed, folk will get the hump and react badly. But to bundle in after that nonsense is a little embarrassing and Barton protesting against the very thing he did is somewhat hypocritical. But it’s not just Barton, although he is an easy target. Lampard and Torres both tried conning the ref, two players you would expect better from. It all just leaves an unpleasant taste resonating and you feel, well just a little cheated. It wasn’t always like this was it Michael? ‘Nah it was great a few years ago’ I thought so.

So maybe I will invest a little more time in the lower leagues. Besides it’s real football ain’t it.

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Keep it down the football's about to start.

2011-08-10T11:46:00.000-07:00

So these riots are getting a bit much, there was talk of postponing the cricket! And even going as far as cancelling the footie this weekend in effected areas. I mean these young upstart looters are giving good old fashioned football thuggery a bad name. So much so that 200 “Millwall fans” turn up in Eltham (South London) to ‘protect’ the high street from potential looters, it’s always Millwall fans isn’t it? It could have been Glasgow and it would have still been “Millwall Fans”. I’d like to believe their intentions were good so this feeling of pride doesn’t sink into one of guilt. The fact that they caused the police an extra burden (as any vigilante group would) is, I suppose, secondary to the fact that you can only push people so far before something’s going to give. Though this is a both and sickening and fascinating discussion point, this is a light hearted sports blog so that's what we’ll talk about; sport.... You see the thing is it’s no coincidence that the effected areas are amongst the poorest in the country. There's no easy answer to determine why this has happened on the scale that it has. The core organisation can only succeed with the sheep like obedience of the opportunist, without them you don’t have the masses and the upraising can be curbed, or so I read on the Guardian website, anyway football… I’ll be gutted if they cancel any of the opening Premier League fixtures. The football League got underway last week and that was exciting enough. The Scottish League had their mandatory 3 days break before resuming. It’s all kicking off and I can’t wait.

The safe bet again this year is whoever finishes above Man United will win the league. I’m sure this will be the most competitive in years, City and Chelsea have both strengthened. Spurs have retained some key players which is probably more important than any new signing. Wenger clearly concerned that his first team average age was creeping over 20 has bought the next 17 year old wonder kid. I wager Arsenal fans didn’t see that one coming. Liverpool have bought well and by well I mean terribly spending a borrow load of money on dross. So knowing my predictions expect them to challenge for the title. United have added in the key areas and still hope to add Wesley Sneijder, who is the perfect replacement for the retiring Paul Scholes, who been integral to United way of play over the last generation. So here’s hoping that the mindless violence and destruction over the last couple of days that has shamed a nation can give way to something we can all be proud of the most entertaining football league in the world.

Plus well done to the chap that started the #cleanuplondon campaign. The best in people can often come out as a result of the worse in people. That sounds like something out of super hero movie. Oh that's right it's a piece of dialogue from my self penned 'umbrella man'. One man wages war on the English changeable weather. I'm so very lonely.

Tennis anyone?

2011-07-03T02:18:00.000-07:00

OK so I thought I’d left it long enough I’ll have to write something about Wimbledon just to satisfy my Daily Mail royalist followers. We’ve already had the obligatory strawberries, cream and rain but thankfully this year no Cliff. He wasn’t invited, apparently it had nothing to do with the unconfirmed rumour that he complained that the ball boys looked too old and more to do with untimely out burst all those years ago. No-one wants to here Summer Holiday acapella (or from Fabio for that matter) and to emphasise that very point the LTA built a roof costing a few million pounds just to stop it happening again, take the hint Cliff.

Now I must confess I’m a closet tennis fan and have a lot of man love for Roger Federer, so my interest waned with his departure. I was pleased by his reaction though, no tears more dignity and apparently in the changing room he performed an excellent parody of Danny Glover character in Lethal weapon; dusting himself down and with classic Federer timing delivered the immoral line ‘I’m getting to old for this shit’ trust me Nadal piss’s himself at that little number.

I still can’t look at centre without thinking what a great 5 aside football pitch it would make but also what heritage and OK we didn’t invent tennis but it’s still considered the home of the game (give us something it’s not as if we’re any good at it). Which seamlessly leads me on to Andy Murray. That's a little unfair on the surly Scot, he been part of the established top 4 for a few years and he could argue that he’s bang unlucky being at his peak at the same time as Federer and Nadal, so credit were it’s due. But when life’s grossly unfair like that, you’ve just gotta laugh right? But he’s way to serious where his sense of humour? I mean that attempted beard was pretty funny but he must have a heart of stone not to laugh at the ‘Come on Tim’ gags.

Jo Wilfried Tsonga was a revelation embracing the very essence of Wimbledon with his athletic net game, leaping airborne even when it wasn’t really unnecessary, even Boris was impressed though he had just nipped back from the Nobu after lunch, so was in a good mood. Tsonga eventually lost out to a superior Djokovic who’s form this year may even have him slight favourite in the final but only if you were a little crazy, as he’s playing Nadal. My respect for Nadal increases with ever tournament I’d always judged him with an unfair Federer bias but in truth, if he’s not better he’s certainly on a par and it’s about time people started referring to him as the greatest of all time. It’s only a matter of time before he surpasses Fereder’s 16 slams and once us Federer fans accept that, the sooner we can really start to appreciate Nadal for what he is; the very embodiment of a true winner. So even if you’re rooting for Djokovic with alterior motive tomorrow just remember that Nadal will be considered an all time great so just let it happen and enjoy it.

With all the hype about tomorrow final can you imagine if Murray had got there?Still it's not all bad news when it comes to British tennis, Laura Robson’s performed well and she could be the next great white hope. And word is we have a young lad; Liam Brady who’s made the boys final so here’s hoping! Oh and it turns out he’s got a mustard left foot and all..

The future's Bright the future's red

2011-06-13T11:33:00.000-07:00

Well nice to see that mini international football mirrors that of it’s slightly balding greying older brother. As a group of mostly experienced English premier league players get passed off the park by a technically superior Spanish outfit. I had convinced myself that the result was secondary and that individual performances were key. Until we equalised with just minutes remaining, of course then rightfully determining that the result was all important. Which was handy as outside the Spanish team there wasn’t too much to shout about. The one shining light for England was that of right back Kyle Walker who was as good going forward as he was defensive, qualities perhaps not associated with Glen Johnson the current full international incumbent.

Though England relinquish large amounts of possession, in truth we were sound defensively limiting Spain the few clear cut chances. That said they were surprising un-assured at corners considering the teams involved but unlike natural ability that is something that can be coached, so little emphasis should be put on that. Besides the ultimate goal from these tournaments is to identify just a handful of players who can make the step up to become a full international. Chris Smalling and Brad Jones again played well defensively but where woeful in possession. Adopting for the long ball more often than not. Smalling in particular seemly lofting the ball high as it went long, whatever happened to pinging the ball?

Henderson seems very average and Mancienne seemed happy to let the game pass him by rarely showing short, perhaps this was the managers instructions to hit the ball long early to stretch the game, the Spanish philosophy is to press high, so there is logic there. But with that approach it's probably best not play with two strikers who do their best work on the shoulder of the last man. Still Psycho, the man who made a living from the ‘non league channel ball’ has to be the right man for the job right? God forbid we get dragged into a decent game of football. But what about the peno celebration in 96! Yea good shout you can’t argue with passion that’s exactly what England lack, forget this tippy tappy nonsense, can’t we forge Lee Cattermole’s birth certificate or something.

In truth maybe I’m doing Stuart Pearce an injustice but if your opposition rarely gives the ball away surely it’s football 101 to try look after it as best you can? Still it’s important to take the positives, England could feasibly go on and win the tournament then once again we’re have a golden generation to look forward to, remember you heard it here first, I for one never doubted them. Best team in the world. All together now; EN-G-LAND repeat until cooked throughout.

Pre Holiday Blues

2011-06-07T11:18:00.000-07:00

Sorry this blog is a late and somewhat lethargic but I was a little tried I mean I’ve posted 20% more entries than my opposing Swiss counterpart Le pêche absolue. Beside the season’s finished and I thought I’d go on holiday early to sit on a sofa in some poncy beach bar in Marbella, jeez what a terrible performance. I’m not intentionally trying to discredit the Swiss who more than deserved a result. But still you’ve got to be looking to win these games. I mean this is qualifying right? If we have aspirations of eventually winning the tournament this should be no less than a comfortable victory. Maybe we need to scale down our self-proclaimed ranking amongst the footballing elite. I went to game and if I had of paid I would have asked for my money back. As it happens I’ve still got the hump with the person who got me the tickets, I mean what did I ever do to them?

I’m not one to irrationally demand the immediate resignation of the manager as soon as a ball is mis-controlled. But Capello OUT! I jest. But he doesn’t make life easy for himself. Milner didn’t featured heavily for City in their impressive end of season finish. But he gets a start for England. Granted it was a warm day and England had used their 3 subs but towards the end he just looked off the pace, surely Capello must have seen that coming? He’s simply not match fit. Lampard hadn’t done much in the first but a goal does wonders for the confidence and that wasn’t exploited. Bring Ashley Young on wasn’t the problem, though I’ll stand by my earlier judgement that he’s not the answer to whatever your question is. Unless that question is ‘Who dives too much and thinks he’s a little better than he actually is? Admittedly my stance on AY is a little irrational but I’ve picked my corner. The fact remained that an injection of pace was needed. And I can’t argue that his finish was clinical and indeed needed.

Poor old Darren Bent, the problem with a striker like him is he will always nick you a goal usually unexpected but he’ll never have that composure you associate with the top players. Folks tend to remember the glaring misses and cue ‘my old women could have scored that’ on FB status’s up and down the country. There’s something very Andy Cole about him. With the recently spate of players retiring from the international scene. We are reminded how harshly Andy or Andrew Cole (his momma call him Andy I’ll call him Andy) was treated. Remember the ‘I’m also retiring from International football’ T-Shirts, hilarious by the way. So lets not get on Bent’s back, there’s talent there, football’s all about confidence and momentum. He’s scored goal in the premier league for years and will continue to do so. And I’m not having that international football is a step up it’s not, only mentally perhaps. So inevitably he must start scoring goals for England soon right?... Right? Forget this Where’s my ‘Come back Crouchy’ T-shirt gone.

Champions but not of Europe.

2011-05-31T11:55:00.000-07:00

So I only watched the first 10 minutes of the Champions League final, there was an Extreme Makeover Special on the other side. I assumed United smashed it right? Oh! They started well enough. So that was Fergie’s A game; run around like lunatics for 90 minutes. No one dare mention they tried that two years ago and failed in fear of the ‘Hairdryer’ or worse still the Beckham treatment. Of course there was no future in trying out hassle Barcelona, they get that every week.

The game panned out pretty much exactly how the bookies had said it would. But that wasn’t the most annoying thing nor was it the plaudits Messi received over the weekend, though both grated on me. A small caveat regarding Messi; Granted he’s the best player of his generation & he did score but come on Van Der Saar should have done better with his goal. I know he didn’t so it’s academic but I’m struggling to think of anything he did better than any other Barca player? And I know he scored but I’ve already explained VDS should have save it, man I would have saved it! Though that’s slightly unfair as I’m pretty tidy in-between the sticks. In fact the most annoying thing was United saw Inter Milan get the better of Barcelona last year by not playing into their hands. Adopting the ‘we don’t want the ball, you can keep it’ approach. This has it's pit falls but if you’re clinical it’s proven successful in the past. I’ve yet to see anyone out-play Barcelona so why try? That certainly doesn’t mean you need to employ Antonio Valencia as your midfield enforcer. What was the lad thinking? He’d been excellent up to and after his injury but then he decides that running at and beating players isn’t his game, instead he's gonna rough them up a bit. I know it was born out of frustration but it was just plain silliness. In truth I think only Rooney from the United ranks came out with any credit, his tireless running is a guarantee and great finish to boot clawed United back into it albeit briefly.

So let’s all congratulate Barcelona for a well deserved victory but excuse me if I don’t revel in their smugness and in my humble un-paid opinion nor should you either. Fergie touched on the increase of tribalism in the domestic game in a pre match interview. I think that highlights the heighten power and exposure of the Premier League and the pull of your local team. The fact that a fan of a English club would prefer a Spanish side win a European competition over their English counterpart is, well just a little foreign to me. No clever wording intended. Frankly enjoying another loses perhaps only papers over the cracks in your own team’s failures.

It was a shame for the United who finally surpassed the 18^th League titles of arch rivals Liverpool. But now they have a new goal of equalling the 5 Champions League/European cups won by the same nemesis, nothing stirs the juices like local bragging rights. Apparently Rooney’s England buddy Stevie Gerrard was seen celebrating United defeat and the pictures have been splashed all over Twitter. Rest assured @Wazza8 & @Rio5 were online immediately registering their displeasure. The thing is I did want United to win but had they won, they wouldn’t have half gone on about it.

Survival Sunday

2011-05-25T14:18:00.001-07:00

It was billed as ‘Survival Sunday’ ‘it’s 2 of 5 that will drop’ as those friendly folk at Sky would happily reminded us. On days like today they’re just in their element! There were plenty of ‘Many more twists and turns’ ‘Press red button’ ‘The table as it stands’ relegation bingo was at full flow! Jeff and the boys were in typically fine fettle and the Paul Merson for PM campaign continues to gather pace. Sky absolutely love it and for me it’s great viewing. I even forgot my team were playing, which is fortunately as they lost.

It’s always a shame that someone has to going down. Inevitably you’re going kinda like whoever it is, as usually it’s the plucky underdog that’s fought all season but falls just short at the final hurdle, step up Blackpool. The premier league will be a less exciting place without them and I think there’s even a place for Ian Holloway. But with Holloway very much like the drunk kid you see every now and again who pulls down his pants at the party, it just ain’t the same watching him do it week in week out. Especially when he has a habit of contradicting himself fairly regularly. But still there’s always room for a drunk pulling down their pants right?

The irony that comes with Birmingham’s exit was they were 3 minutes away from their best season in recently history. If Wolves hadn’t had scored their second it’s unlikely they would have conceded, thus staying up. Having secured the league cup and a European spot for next year with premier league

survival, McLeish could have expected the keys to the city. Now all he’ll get is the keys to a cheap mid range Chinese import. Actually I’ve no idea how Carson Yeung made his money, I’m hoping cars. I suppose I could Wikipedia it.. OK it was penny stocks and a Casino, there no joke there I’m sticking with cars.

But it wasn’t all rainy days and Sunday night bath time. Three clubs escaped the drop on the final day, so there was reason to cheer. And cheer they did, crowd invasions and kids kissing TV cameras. Roberto Martinez the Wigan manager was so elated he threw his jacket into the crowd forgetting to take out his wallet. The wallet was return missing £17.58 but bearer bonds totalling a 25% stake in JJB sports unfortunately remained. He said after the game he’d felt like he’d won a trophy but in truth it was probably more than that. These clubs are now a slave to the reddies and dropping out the division has serious repercussions on the bank balance and not just the club’s, those managers who just survived the drop can expect to get a regular pay check over the summer, where as for the others I not so sure.

That's your Ancelotti

2011-05-23T13:31:00.000-07:00

Life would be proper boring if you won everything all the time. To really enjoy the high’s you must first taste low’s right? Well wrong actually applying to the logic of the world accordingly to Abramovich. I suppose if you’re use to getting everything you want, whenever you might develop a heighten sense of impatience. Like a Roman Caesar giving the thumbs down at the Coliseum for a fallen Gladiator. Abramoich asserts the same amount of power at Stamford Bridge. Antelotti’s sacking may not have been as public but it was certainly as anticipated. Winning the double in his first year was all well and good, but it’s simply wasn’t the holy grail that is the champions league and he’s paid the ultimate price for a trophy-less season. And if that indignation wasn’t enough, he might end up managing West Ham. I hope someone’s mentioned that the leafy suburbs west of London are a little different to that of East ham and Stratford.

So what next for Carlo? I’m sure he’ll have a number of offers from his native Italy, he’s never hid his desire to Manager Roma one day. But he seems happy in London maybe the West Ham comment wasn’t a flippant as first thought, surely he won’t. If he is to stay in England it’ll be in the premier league. Could he be the one to take Spurs to the next level? Redknapp will need to find something to tie him over til next summer, maybe he can temp until then

‘Nah I won’t be photo copying all my life one day I hope to manage England’

The problem that Chelsea now face, a problem that’s completely self inflicted. Is that this seemingly perpetual swing axe has created an air of uncertainty amongst a number of potential suitors. So attracting the right man might prove difficult, that said everyone has there price right? So we could see Alex Ferguson at Chelsea next year. Maybe not, though I wouldn’t put it past Abramovich to ask the question.

When Mourinho was at the club there were rumbles of discontent within the hierarchy about how they were perceived from their peers and the wider footballing public. It’s true that Ancelotti is hardly a cunning linguist but he had a warmth and sincerity that was refreshing. But any credit built up under his reign was lost with the ruthless manner in which he was dismissed. You can’t help but feel sorry for Ancelotti, not too sorry mind, a £5 million severance package and a year’s gardening leave if he wants it. Actually I fancy a piece of that action, I could manage Chelsea and probably not win the champions league, knowing my luck I’d probably win and have to get up for work in the morning!

Northern Soul

2011-05-20T14:45:00.000-07:00

So with some pretty serious green spent and an FA cup medal to show, the City revolution has shifted up a gear. United fans can still justifiably mock, after all it’s just one trophy in some thirty odd years. But don’t be fooled this was a ‘watershed’ moment as Martin Tyler happened to mention once or twice in the lead up to the celebrations. Actually why we’re on the subject didn’t he have a bucket load of pointless facts about players nationalities with loose connections to the FA Cup!? Apparently Mancini is only the second Italian manager since Gianluca Vialli of Chelsea to win the FA cup. The Ivory Coast has apparently dominated the scorers the last few years. And my favourite Tevez was going to be the third Argentinean to win the cup, since Ozzie & Ricky back in 81. He couldn’t bring himself to say and here comes the fourth as Tevez was replaced for Zabaleta.

Unfortunately just like Martin’s stats that interlude was neither interesting or funny, let us never speak of it again, agreed.

Scoring the winner in both the Semi and the Final; Yaya Toure is apparently justifying his huge reported salary though I remain unconvinced. Scoring a hand full of goals and being ‘deceptively quick’ doesn’t warrant a quarter of mill a week. Or maybe it does if Maxi Rodriguez is still earning his crust playing football then everything’s possible. But then what do I know?

With City qualifying for the Champion league they are undoubtedly on the cusp of something special. It got me thinking about the potential strangle hold the two Manchester clubs could have on English and Europe football. Who has it better; United or City? Of course United have all that glorious history. I mean their fans are all too eager to tell anyone who’s prepared to listen and why not after securing that 19^th league title. But I’m talking about the next 5 years. The fact is United fans are and will for the foreseeable future be alot harder to please, with success comes expectation. The League’s in the bag and a Champion's League final to look forward to and you know there’ll be some United fans shruggling their shoulders saying ‘Meh, but where’s the free flowing football’. Where as City have just won the FA cup and their fans will be doing the Pozmen for weeks. Will that ever get boring? I hope not. Still applying the logic that the grass is always greener. I wonder if some United fans are just a little envious knowing that City are now at the start of an incredible journey as it’s often the anticipation as apposed to the result that we most enjoy. Though United could argue they too are on a journey but they left a little earlier to beat the traffic. Plus what City fan wouldn’t give their right arm to have United’s recent history.

But I suppose that’s just our inquisitive nature we always want to see what it’s like from the other side. All bookies want to be Publicans and all Publicans want to be bookies. I mean everyone wants to be to different. Believe me all The Fonze ever really wanted wanted to do was make people laugh.

‘Hey Mrs C there’s two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Do you know how to drive this thing? ‘Aaay’.

A sip of bitter Fosters

2011-05-14T02:45:00.000-07:00

So Ben Foster retires indifferently from England sighting that old prolonging his career Chestnut. I’m all for freedom of choice but that doesn't mean folks always get it right. I have a feeling that Foster decision is based not on rational thought but more on bitter indignation towards the current manager. I understand that frustration can boil over but that’s part and parcel of being a professional between the posts. You can’t squeeze a keeper in at right midfield like you could an outfield player. If Capello has chosen his number one and it ain’t you then you're gonna warm the bench.

I suppose with the inevitably of it all he could easily get disillusioned but on the same hand you know your role in the squad and exactly what needs to be done to improve that. So what happens when Joe Hart gets injured? Will he sacrifice his domestic career to salvage a country in need? Or will he stick to his guns? I’d hope neither and should the circumstance arise I would hope he’s not even considered.

Let’s not forgot he only 28, in goalkeeping years that’s about the spotty adolescence stage. That’s a little too young to be retiring from the international scene. Now I’m not here to start pedaling nonsense about how millions of kids would give their right arm to be in his position but, well, millions of kids would give their.. well you get the point.

The irony is we all kinda wish David James would retire but at 104 he still has the desire to compete at the international stage despite probably never been good enough or I should say consistently good enough. Undoubtedly talented sadly the only consistent theme throughout his career was his penchant for a silly error. But Foster needn’t look further than David James for inspiration he’s was often chastised but he stuck it out, not always in the squad but always available. When he was he took his chance, well until he messed up but that’s hardly the point.

So for Ben Foster it’s never too to change his mind I just hope it’s sooner rather than later. If it comes just prior to England successful qualification to Euro 2014 I for one wont support his inclusion. If he doesn’t change his mind then good luck to him I’m sure he’ll enjoy his new found down time, I mean working until 2 everyday must be a awful strain, finally a chance to play a little golf right?

Imfamy

2011-04-30T06:29:00.000-07:00

‘Infamy, infamy, they’ve all got it in for me’ probably the best thing to come from any Carry on film. Inadvertently it's almost a perfect summing up of the self proclaimed special one. At complete ease in his role as ringmaster when the sun’s shining and the birds are singing but should the weather take a turn for the worse, he’ll openly mock the very circus he’s created. Maybe that’s just the Mourinho way? ‘He diverts the attention from the players’ folks say ‘He creates a them and us culture’. This is all true but I’m not buying it, these both convenient consequences of his basic intention. The fact is he just absolutely loves a good old row.

He’s a terrible winner, over exuberant and often smug and he’s an even worse loser. Frequently refusing to accept a lost. Sighting goals from the moon or how winning by penalties doesn’t actually count. With all this in mind the over riding feeling should be one of dislike, I mean I’m all for fair play, honesty and integrity. But there’s something inside of me that reject this natural feeling. Unfortunately there’s no way I can say this without sounding like the Prom Queen who has a crush on the school bad boy 'why do I like him so’?

I spend any spare time I have reading the works of early 19th century Russian authors so clearly I’m way too cool to be watching programmes of the ilk of Eastenters and Corrie. But I still have yearning for drama in my life and I think football and Mourinho in particular satisfies this desire for the soup opera. He’s a complete megalomaniac but has a warmth and charm that’s endearing. He’s like the mate who will always let you down but you simply can’t stay mad for reasons you can't quite explain. Even those who claim to dislike Mourinho are surely still entertained by him in the pantomime villain role that he’ll often portray.

I think Mourinho has a tremendous sense of perspective he knows only to well that the typical footie fan has a short memory and that contradicting himself is seldom a problem. Even those who highlight any anomalies can come off a little smug ala Media watch at footie365. But take the ‘parking the bus’ saga, Mourinho airing his disappointment for the fans that came to watch a festival of football only to be stifled by a team defending deep. How often has Mourinho been the one parking the bus? With much success it has to be said, too many for most I’m sure. The reason I think he gets away with it is because he completely commits to what he saying, call it arrogance or a unabashed confidence he makes people sit up and listen to what he has to say, whether you like it or not. He may have lost his latest battle but I have a feeling he’s going to win the war, even if that war is him verse the four walls in an empty room.

Domestic Bliss

2011-04-26T14:26:00.000-07:00

Through the mid to late eighties and early nineties, if you were to ask someone within the football fraternity what was the best league in Europe? The answer would almost certainly come back as Italy’s Serie A. Leading into the late nineties there was a changing of the guard though no-one seemed really sure who’s shift it was.

Teams from Italy, England, Germany, Spain and Portugal all winning Europe’s top prize around. The so called Real Madrid Galacticos had created a false economy in Spain. They were undoubtedly the best side though perhaps not playing the best league.

Picking up at the present day, I think it’s acknowledged that it’s a toss up between the English and Spanish domestic leagues. A duel between two very different footballing mentalities. The skilful technical; La Liga or the pacey and powerful English Premier League (EPL). Both have their plaudits and both have their critics. I think with Barcelona and Real Madrid currently at the height of their powers, each sporting one of the two best players in the world, it’s difficult to look past La Liga as king. Though you could argue that there’s no real comparable strength in depth, to the EPL that is. I mean when is the last time a team in the bottom three of Li Liga beat, three of the top six in the same season? As Wolves have done this year in England. It simply doesn’t happen. OK the technical ability of a Blackburn or Wigan is some way off the likes of an Osasuna or Seville. But I’d still rather watch the EPL if only for the potential to be a great game out weighs that of their Spanish peers.

Last Wednesday night was shining example. Another El Classico, this time the Final of The Copa Del Rey, Messi Vs Ronaldo (again), Barca V Madrid (again) cue the Sky Sports marketing machine. Meantime on the same evening just off Seven Sisters Road, Spurs were playing Arsenal in the North London derby. The difference in entertainment couldn’t have been greater. I realise that it’s unfair to judge on just one game but it hardly unusual is it? People say that Barca’s thrashing of Madrid earlier this season was one of the great exhibitions of football. But I’d still argue it wasn’t a good game, any team winning 5 nil is never a good game, it falls short on the vital ingredient that is competitiveness. The fact is, one sided games are boring.

Anyway back to Wednesday night and North London, this was a full-blooded, committed encounter with both teams playing quick, powerful exciting football. OK the Spanish cup final may have been tense, both sides trying to out wit one another akin to a well played game of chess. Well, news flash chess is boring. This game offered nothing in terms of excitement, the best part of the evening came during the open top bus celebration. Where as in London it was the complete opposite, end to end and action packed. The movie equivalent would boost the star performances from; Stallone, Statham and maybe a cameo from Van Damme.

So you can keep your tippy tappy football give me a 50/50 challenge and the crowd reacting to it in a manor befitting a 30 yarder belter smashed into the top corner…

Torres conundrum

2011-04-16T06:46:00.000-07:00

When Ji Sang Park scored United’s second goal on Tuesday night Champions League quarter final restoring their lead. It didn’t only effectively end Chelsea’s hopes in this year’s competition, it ended Chelsea’s season. Sadly for Chelsea I’ve a feeling their problems wont end there. With Torres miss-firing again, Ancelotti has a 50 million pound question that remains unanswered. I think it was universally acknowledged that Didier Drogba should have started against United even without the benefit of hindsight. Torres is clearly low on confidence and no amount of ‘he’s playing for the team’ nonsense from Ancelotti is going to change that. Torres can’t lie to myself, he knows he’s not playing well and needs to start scoring. Carlo seems to be giving Torres more opportunity than there are Fast and Furious movies. Seriously who keep funding these movies? Anyway I digress, it’s been suggested that he maybe under pressure from above to ensure Torres comes good. But I wonder if Abramovich now has the buyer’s remorse, frantically turning his yacht upside down looking for that sale receipt.

The problem that Chelsea and in particular Ancelotti faces is the Drogba / Torres conundrum, can they play together? Are they the new Gerrard and Lampard? Are Katie and Alex the new Ross and Rachel? Never mind.

Torres plays best on the shoulder of the last defender where as Drogba is the archetypal target man. So they’re not completely similar so why has it been so difficult. A clash of egos maybe? Though I wouldn’t agree, all footballers want to play with the best players, providing they are indeed playing of course! Torres’s lack of goals and in turn lack of confidence is at the core. Should he start scoring the problem resolve itself and that must be inevitable. Whether Ancelotti sees this turn around is another question.

I think it’s important for Chelsea to build the side around their key players. In the past Chelsea have successfully played to their strengths. The foundations built on a strong defence, which allows Lampard and co licence to roam and create.

Undeniably neither Drogba nor Torres will be content to warm the bench. Given Chelsea have four excellent centre halves. With the inclusion of an attacking right back of the ilk of Ashley Cole. A simple change of formation could see them back to winning ways. Playing with three centre backs and two wing backs will allow for two strikers with an attacking midfield element, thus accommodating Chelsea’s key players. Of course if that doesn’t work then Roman can always go out and buy a couple more super stars, apparently he’s doing alright for himself.

Georgia On My Mind

2011-04-11T14:43:00.000-07:00

'Don’t choke, don’t choke, and don’t choke man I knew I was going to choke'. The immortal line of Otis from the Simpson as he leaves Homer a 7/10 spit. You know that Rory Mcllroy must have been repeating something very similar to himself as he struggled round the first 9 on his final round at Augusta on Sunday. Sadly it wasn’t to be enough, Rory was still the outright leader as he was teeing off at the 10^th but if his head wasn’t already gone after his patchy start, it was once he recorded a triple bogey on the same hole.

It appears that leading the Masters going into the last day was just a step too far for this talented youngest. Bogeying the first had set the standard and he struggled from then on in. No amount of self motivation was going to turn his day round. In his heart I think deep down he must have know it wasn’t going to be his day. But in a morbid sense, it really was gripping viewing. You were desperate for him to recover but knew he wouldn’t, it was car crash TV at it’s most compelling. What made it so difficult was it was real life, unscripted horror, you simply had to watch just to see how it unfolded.

It’s funny how the Physique works, if he’d been trailing the lead by 3 teeing off at the eleventh after just recording a birdie he would fancy he’s chances but the reality was he’s card had taken a 7 shot swing in the wrong direction and he didn’t want to be there. As for Charles Schwartzel it was a complete reversal of fortune, chipping in at the first and eagling the par 4 third. He could be forgiven for thinking this might be my day, and so it proved as he finished on -14 adding the green jacket to his wardrobe.

As for Mcllroy, comparisons were made to Greg Norman's collapse in 96. Norman didn’t win any further majors after this though is only two victories came outside the US at The Open. The sympathetic pundits all proclaiming that his post round interview showed he was mature beyond his years and gracious in defeat but this was hardly consolation. 'He’ll learn from this, it’ll make him a better player' they'll say. I hope for Rory’s sake it does. But I can’t see how losing a 4 shot lead on the final day of a major is a good learning curve. Thankfully Rory has time on his side and I’m sure in time he’ll draw positives from this experience. But I’m sure he would have preferred to have drawn from this experience knowing that’s when he won his first major. Having led at The Open last year and although he was unfortunate with the weather conditions he posted a similar disastrous (but this time) second round score.

The longer you keep knocking on the door but failing to win the bigger that monkey on your back becomes. Just ask Rory's Twitter bubby Andy Murray. Unfortunately For Rory for the next few weeks if not months Ray Charles isn’t the only one with Georgia on his mind.

The Masters

2011-04-06T06:09:00.000-07:00

Winston Churchill once famously said Golf was a good walk spoiled. There times when I’ve just thinned my sixth shot from bunker to bunker, I would agree. Winston might have been referring to Augusta National when he made that quip. Undoubtedly one of the most picturesque golf course’s in the world I’d still rather hack round in 90 plus than simply walk it.

This year’s Masters is as keenly anticipated as any in recent history. Tiger Woods has now has resume a full playing calendar. Mickelson, the returning champion is in ominous form and as for Dustin Johnson it’s surely only a matter of time before he starts to win Majors. With the smart money on the US players it’s looking increasing likely that the European drought will continue for another year, or will it?

There has been a definitely switch in power, in the world rankings at least with now six Europeans making up the top ten. There have been some mitigating circumstances that have contributed to positions but you can’t deny the likes of Kaymar, Westwood, McDowell and Donald are all serious contenders for this year’s Masters.

The ever confident, Ian Poulter is in with a shout. Though as at the start of all competitions his optimistic exuberance might get the better of him. I have a feeling that he might regret albeit innocently suggesting that Tiger won’t finish in the top 5. I think its only a matter of time before Tiger starts firing on all cylinders but the longer his indifferent form continues the harder it’s going to be.

I’d personally love to see a European winner and maybe it’s too much to ask but what the odds of the likeable Sergio Garcia eliminating his Spanish counterpart José María Olazábal, the last European to win the Masters. Well actually about 80/1 depending where you look. Worth a cheeky punt I’d say.

Augusta lends itself to those with the short game to cope with greens. Mickelson seems to be peaking just at the right time, coming from his recent win in Texas, it difficult to look past him for a winner. If Kaymer wins here it could be the catalyst to dominating the game for some time to come. I’m hoping Westwood brakes is Major duck and loses the nearly man tag he’s inherited from Monty.

All in all this is building up to be the most hotly contested Masters in years. It’s a must see event, even with the ominous Butch Harmon looking directly at you down your TV screen.

The Reluctant Role Model

2011-04-05T10:22:00.000-07:00

Wayne Rooney’s bizarre potty mouth celebration that saw him scream into a live TV camera after he completing his hat-trick against West Ham. Was admittedly ill advised but it certainly wasn’t the apocalyptic rant that particular sections of the media would have you believe. One or two of the more sensationalist amongst the media (daily mail) argue that he's brought the whole respect campaign to it’s knees, I’m afraid that un-welcomed stain rests entirely at the door of the FA. They’re shown no courage in punishing offenders, concerned more with media rights and money making. Which has resulted in no significant bans for high profile players who blatantly disregard the campaign Thus we’ve made little or no progress into what will only become a bigger problem in football.

With that said Rooney outburst wasn’t aim at the referee. So this is not an attempt to defend or justify Rooney rant but more to understand why and apply rational thought and perspective to the incident.

Undoubtedly Rooney was subject to a torrent of abuse from the West Ham fans. Though this is nothing new and indeed he would expect to be on the receiving end of the less than flattering chants at ever away ground in the country. What makes Saturday’s game different to others was that United went 2 nil. Now applying to the logic you only sing when you’re winning these chants would have only increased. Cue Rooney almost single handily dragging United back into the game that culminated (for him), in a Penalty that completed what was to be a match winning hat-trick. Regardless of the amount of money you earn no-one like being called a so and so and reminded of previous misdemeanours regardless of how comical or eloquently there’re sung. So after scoring it’s quite possible that Rooney released some of that pent up aggression that I’m sure the chanting had contributed to. Celebrating with the United away support he left a partly gesture to the West Ham fan via a live Sky TV camera. Stupid, foolish and vulgar but lest we forget who we’re dealing with. All three adjectives could be use if describing Rooney to a footballing novice. But so could Brilliant, inspiring and gifted. I think Rooney has and will continue to grow as a person. All his indiscretions have been made in public. He is paid handsomely but that does not exempt him from making mistakes.

Rooney is undoubtedly a role model, but If you were to hand pick any public figure to be a role model for your kid, I’m fairly confident that Wayne Rooney wouldn’t be a the top of your list. Or maybe he would, to the poorer working class families maybe he’s the perfect role model, evidence that if you couple hard work with talent you can accomplish anything. Very few will deny Rooney’s work ethic or talent for that matter.

The truth this is ambiguous as it’s completely subjective. What I'll simply accept, someone else may find very offensive. But I suppose that’s life. The bottom line is if you’re kid comes home ranting and raving just like his/her idol Wayne Rooney, instead of pointing the finger, perhaps just tell them not to do it, I believe they call that good parenting and if your not happy with that then...

f**k you, WHAT?

Cricket World Cup

2011-04-04T05:15:00.000-07:00

The dust now settled on the 2011 Cricket World Cup. The event can be hailed a complete success. Even with the over exuberant efforts of fans applying for tickets and the subsequent heavy-handed approach of the police couldn’t subdue the enthusiasm. The police’s approach though over the top was excusable given the security fears that hung over the tournament.

With the host’s, India victorious the weight of the nation was metaphorically lifted from the shoulders of the Indian squad. With certain individuals bearing the bulk of the weight. The Script for Tendukar to guide India to victory reaching his hundredth hundredth was almost too perfect, alas it wasn’t to be. Instead it was both Gambhir and Dhoni stepped up and satisfied the intense nation’s hopes. With Sri Lanka posting a total of 274, India surpassed that with six wickets remaining, Dhoni topping off a man of match performance dispatching a 6 to win in a manor befitting a schoolboy cricketers dream.

With the Twenty20 format going from strength to strength this tournament certainly demonstrated the need for the 50 over game. With most nations building on the nucleus of their test side the technically gifted cricketers still shone. Twenty20 can focus on the big hitters who too often rely on luck over judgement. Undoubtedly entertaining but potentially risking the quality of ability of future generations. With the 50 over game there is suitably enough time to adopt the patience methodical approach, which undeniably will still require a polished technique. But still with the potential to finish on a knife edge creating that nail biting finale.

With Sky’s involvement the exposure of game is at an all time high. The development of the game in sub-continent was never in doubt. Tendukar is not an Indian superstar he is THE Indian superstar. Kids will always continue to play cricket in India and the surrounding countries. As for the home nations the ECB are thankful to steal the limelight from football or rugby whenever the opportunity presents itself. Of course England need to perform when these windows come along. No-one could argue that England weren’t entertaining in the group stage and they injected some much need life into the early stages of the competition, involved in compelling game’s with Ireland, India and the Windes. The problem being all sporting teams will always be ultimately judged on results. As Arsenal are ridiculed for their lack of trophies despite the attractive football as will England for their entertaining albeit inconsistent style.

We touched on it earlier, the most successful one day sides consist of the best technically gifted players from the test side. England continue to buck this trend by picking powerful county players who perform well domestically. Though I appreciate that playing well needs to be rewarded, surely for the big international tournaments we should be picking the best Cricketers who surely can adjust their style to fit the purpose.

The Meaningless Friendly

2011-03-30T04:33:00.000-07:00

As the England fans stream down Wembley way about 30 minutes before the still celebrating Ghana fans. They could be forgiven for having a sense of new found optimism despite the late Ghanaian equaliser. Even the usual compliant of that meaningless friendly couldn’t be label to this international. With that in mind, for the next England friendly the FA should invite back the 20 thousand odd Ghanaian's who were in attendance this evening. The game's intensity was set by the away fan’s enthusiasm and this inevitably lifted the players. This was a great exhibition of non competitive international football, keenly contested with more than the odd bad foul thrown in for good measure. All these elements helped recreate the atmosphere of a fullc international. The senior regulars still involved in the Champions League were allowed to return to their clubs. So this game was an ideal opportunity for the fringe players to thrust themselves into first team contention. The open manor in which the game was played and fanatical support from the side lines ensured both sides were completely committed.

The commentators and pundits lavished praise upon the two wingers, Ashley Young and Stuart Downing. The stand in Captain Gareth Barry was also singled out for his value. Unfortunately for these three there are more worthy suitors waiting in the wings. Both wide players saw a lot of the ball but this had as much to do with the opposition cavalier attitude than England’s clever inter changing of play. As for Barry, he’s distribution is good but often players can simply drift past him, he gives the impression of treading water. Playing central midfield for England surely requires more than the ability to retain the ball.

I felt the two outstanding significant English performances on the tonight that were that of Andy Carroll and Gary Cahill. These two are the most likely of the fringe players (with everyone fit) to break into the first team fold. Carroll though clearly not match fit was excellent at times linking up well with the midfield support. He has an undoubted ability to retain possession in his hold up play. But the lasting memory will be his goal, having carved out only half chances this clinical left footed strike add more weight to the argument that this kid is going to be a player. With Rio Ferdinand’s continued absence Michael Dawson would appear to have cemented that first reserve slot. Though Gary Cahill has certainly not done himself any harm with his assured performance. I for one would be wouldn’t be unhappy to see Cahill line up alone side John Terry at the heart of the English defence against the Swiss on the 4^th June.

All in all some real positives to take from an English friendly international. That’s not be said to often, I’m not sure I agree with this productive outcome. I’m all for multiple substitutions, multiple Captains and where was that 5 minute cameo from the Championship player of the month? Maybe next time.

Ghana celebrated at the final whistle like they’d won a cup final. Stripping down their reaction, I think the Ghanaian's have miss taken England as a footballing super-power never the less it must have stroked the egos of the English players. England shouldn’t be held in the same regard as the top footballing nations but when decent opposition celebrate a draw in that fashion you might start to believe you belong that the very top, which can only be a good thing.

The conveyor belt Captain

2011-03-23T13:25:00.000-07:00

Eighteen months after losing the England Captaincy Fabio Capello has reinstated John Terry as the England skipper, after Terry’s off field and very public indiscretion. Which in truth regardless of who you are let alone the England captain, was pretty despicable. I mean that’s ‘Mates 101’ some lines shouldn’t be crossed. Still Capello has decided that he’s served his time and perhaps has earned the right to wear the armband. Certainly his performances for Chelsea have continued to receive the usual ‘brave’ and ‘lionhearted’ superlative references. Though that was never in question, Terry is the sort to run through a brick wall for the cause. Terry himself after eighteen month must have questioned whether there were enough walls to run through given the time that passed since he was removed as captain.

So what was Capello’s mind set for reinstating Terry? It was roundly

acknowledged that removing Terry was the right call at the time. Capello is hardly at his most popular surely this is adding fuel to the fire? Indeed the redtops will have a field day, no doubt demanding an end to his reign of terror, that’s par for the course, as all his recent predecessors will testify to.

The problem facing Capello is Ferdinand’s fitness, with only fifteen starts this season he’s hardly an advert for playing consistency. Gerrard again has been injury prone and although he’ll lead by example he’s not the vocal talisman that Terry appears to be. You find yourself searching the senior regulars for a suitable candidate, they’re not exactly forth coming; Ashley Cole? Wayne Rooney? Indeed both Gerrard and Ferdinand have had there fair share of on and off field misdemeanours. Gareth Barry seems pretty clean cut perhaps that’s the reason he gets selected? I can’t think of any other reason he’s included in the squad!

Folks will argue that the modern day footballer is so detached from the average fan that they simply cannot comprehend what it means to follow and indeed play for England though I don’t agree. I appreciate that money corrupts and breeds arrogance but I honestly think it does mean the world to these guys. You don’t start to dream about playing for England when you’re an adult you dream about it when you’re a kid, no amount of money can shake that desire. It the very simple case of boys will be boys. Young men in the media spot light will always make mistakes and they'll be vilified for it but who can claim to never making a mistake? I'm guessing no-one.

So I’m afraid the only way this problem will ever cease is if the media loses interest in these guys and stops scrutinising their every move. Which is unlikely to happen anytime soon given the money they earn and the celebrity that is now associated with the top footballers. This problem will always exist, famous young men with little education and lots of money are, are always going to slip up, hell I would have, in fact I did and probably on more than one occasion. The only difference is I have neither money nor fame so no one cares.

But they’re roles models cry the disgruntled voices of middle England. Actually I beg to differ, they are anything but.