Accidental Blog

Unless a Seed Falls, or, Beyond Dog Dung

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 04:56:00 +0000

Death and resurrection are a becoming a theme for me these days. Still ruminating and mulling over many things as they are being worked out in my own life - so I don't have a lot to articulate personally yet (beyond what I've already expressed here, here, and here, for example). But I'm enjoying sharing with you some of the insights and quotes from other people who've walked the road, and hope that they are meaningful to you as well as myself.

"Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone, never anything more than a grain of wheat; but if it dies, it sprouts up and reproduces itself many times over."

-Jesus (John 12:24 - an amalgamation of translations).

"Periodically one will hear in Christian circles a call to "radical discontinuity." This call is frequently mentioned as the cure for a healthier church whether it comes from those promoting a "Post-Modernistic" perspective or a radical discontinuity from the current style of Christian ministry to that of the First Century.

Perhaps a key to healthier Christian ministry is that the seed would fall in the lives of every Christian leader, every Christian assembly, in every Christian's heart in every place in the world. If the seed of our current expectations of ministry would fall to the ground and die, the result would be the most healthy, vigorous and radical transformation of the church of Jesus Christ.

This transformation would be poised to make disciples of all nations--without discrimination, without judgmentalism free of the imprisonment of unscriptural tyrannical traditionalism, perfectionism and ways of the world which otherwise impede the message of the resurrection.

This radical discontinuity would bring radical transformation. But, given the reality and the historical-spiritual reality of the resurrection, would the resurrected Christ want anything less?"

-Thomas Fischer, Unless Your Seed Falls.

I recommend reading Fischer's message (linked above) in it's entirety.

Religious Qualifications, Expectations, and other Dog Sh*t

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 04:22:00 +0000

"This is the problem Jesus had everywhere He went: The traditions kept trying to tell God what to do."
-Danny Silk

"Rituals are a lousy substitute for relationship [with Christ]. But something in our flesh craves rituals. Rituals are a lousy substitute though."
-Wayne Jacobson

"Steer clear of ...religious busybodies... The very credentials these people are waving around as something special, I'm tearing up and throwing out with the trash - along with everything else I used to take credit for. And why? Because of Christ. Yes, all the things I once thought were so important are gone from my life. Compared to the high privilege of knowing Christ Jesus as my master, firsthand, everything I once thought I had going for me is insignificant - dog sh*t.* I've dumped it all in the trash so that I could embrace Christ and be embraced by Him. I didn't want some petty, inferior brand of righteousness that comes from keeping a list of rules (or expectations, or rituals, or tradition) when I could get the robust kind that comes from trusting Christ - God's righteousness.

I gave up all that inferior stuff so I could know Christ personally, experience His resurrection power, be a partner in His suffering, and go all the way with Him to death itself. If there was any way to get in on the resurrection from the dead, I wanted to do it.

I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward - to Jesus. I'm off and running and I'm not turning back." (Eugene Peterson's translation of Paul's letter to the Philippians, chapter 3).

*The Message Translation uses the word "dung" here, because it's a nice Christian translation. But Paul used a word closer to the English "sh*t" - so in light of accuracy, I opted for that word instead. Unsightly words sometimes communicate more effectively, you know? ;)

In which I talk about Mormon feminism (for Sarah B)

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 03:38:00 +0000

In case you haven't noticed, I'm a public library enthusiast. Toddler Storytime is great for Elliana (as well as the preschool book collection), the DVD selection is fantastic, the librarians are always friendly, yada, yada, yada.

But I especially love the second-hand magazine section. For 10 cents apiece, I can get copies of the Economist that are only like 2 weeks old! How cool is that?! (A subscription to the Economist doesn't come cheap, you know.) Apparently, there's also another feminist hiding somewhere in this hyper-conservative, Dutch-reformed little town of mine. I know this because copies of Bust Magazine regularly show up on the second-hand magazine shelves as well.

The June/July 2007 cover caught my attention with "More Than a Mormon: Feminist Mormons Speak Out." I purchased the issue for the "Desperate Mormon Housewives" article alone. Well worth my dime! Below, I have included some of the best quotes and some of my impressions. Enjoy!

As Emily Summerhays, a 28-year-old feminist Mormon who lives in Brooklyn, NY, puts it, being a Mormon feminist "is a bizarre space to occupy, because Mormons see you as very radical, and secular feminists see you as brainwashed."

A 32-year-old housewife and devout churchgoer living in suburban Boise, ID, Lisa Butterworth explains, "There's a general anti-feminist sentiment in most Mormon circles. [They believe] that feminists want to destroy families and make women share the same bathrooms as men, that feminists want to act like men and be men." This made me laugh knowingly since there's some of that same fear and propaganda within many Evangelical circles.

Interestingly, the article reports on the importance of the internet, and blogging in particular, for Mormon feminists. The Mormon blogosphere (dubbed the "bloggernacle") has become the primary forum for Mormon women discussing feminist issues. Blogs like Zelophehad's Daughters and Exponent II provide good examples. (The latter has an interesting article on "Good Mormon Feminists vs. Bad Mormon Feminists" if you're feeling curious).

Bust's report also explores the contradictions and difficulties with reconciling a Mormon faith and a feminist ethic:

"At the heart of feminism's conflicts with Mormonism are the Church patriarchy and the fact that women don't have priesthood privileges. Although it may seem that, in this regard, Mormonism is no different from, say, Catholicism, the big difference is that all Mormon men have the power of the priesthood, like the ability to lay on hands and give blessings. ...Lack of authority infects every aspect of women's lives. Although the Church has tried to promote a kind of egalitarianism in family life, it also teaches that there is an essential difference between men and women, that wives are primarily responsible for nurturing and that husbands are supposed to "preside" in the home. As Butterworth points out, this leaves women with a very narrow definition of selfhood: 'The Church gives a constant, constant message that domesticity and nurturing are the ultimate goals of womanhood, and that those are the places where we should find fulfillment.' Naturally, anyone who can't comfortably fit into the happy-homemaker role ends up feeling like an outsider, and it's probably no surprise that the ranks of Mormon feminists are rife with misfits - like working mothers, scholars, and childless wives."

Janet Garrard-Willis, a 34-year-old with a PhD living in Salt Lake City had a particularly grievous story of struggling with infertility as a Mormon woman. "For good or ill, my culture almost entirely defines femaleness through maternity. Not being able to have children sort of makes me a freak." Some Mormons, she says, think that infertility means that "you're doing something wrong and God is punishing you." Heartbreaking.

Feminists within the Mormon church, however, have hope for change. They are encouraged by the Church's historical developments in 1978, when Mormonism reversed its racial policies and began admitting African-American men into the priesthood.

Mormon feminists hope that challenging ideas in the bloggernacle might have a trickle-up effect. "The idea of revelation is that you get answers when you ask for them," says Summerhays, "and it seems to me that nobody is asking this question about women because they think they have an answer. But there are all these women who want to know: is the status quo eternal? Or can you at least give us a satisfactory answer as to why it is this way? I feel that the blog is building a community of people who are aware of these questions and who are less and less afraid to ask them."

There are several aspects to this Mormon-feminist stuff that I found interesting. First, I could relate to some of it having come from a conservative subculture myself and its mistrust, misgivings, and serious misunderstandings of "feminism." Second, there was a very Clay-Shirky-ish, empowerment-through-social-media element to it as well (particularly the implications of the internet and blogging for Mormon feminists). And lastly, I just find gender issues interesting and important in any context. :)

Triage

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 07:31:00 +0000

We watched this film tonight, and I'm a bit speechless. But I wanted to post about it, because I think Dr. Orbinski's stories need to be heard. And not only his stories, but more importantly, the stories of those he served. The first video is a trailer, the second is a short promotional video featuring the film's director, Patrick Reed.

I Love to be Loved

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 23:06:00 +0000

This is what we all want; because this is the purpose for which we were created.

I love to be loved. Don't you? Deep gratitude swells up within as I hear this song and abide in Him who is Love. I believe He enjoys it when we enjoy His nature: His love.

I also believe that this Divine Love cannot be contained, but naturally spills out, loving all over a world that's crying out to be loved.

Foto Friday: Fish!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 20:33:00 +0000

It's been crazy around these parts. We had our nieces come and stay for 12 days, and that kept us pretty busy, to say the least. We spent a day in the city together, and enjoyed the Seattle Aquarium very much!

Anywayz, I'm reading an article about Mormon feminism that I find intriguing. Maybe I'll post about that... Or maybe not. In any case, we will be returning to life-as-normal with a little emptier house and less crazy schedule. So I hope to be a little more active on the blog...

Foto Friday: No flash

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 20:18:00 +0000

Last week, I couldn't get blogger to load pictures. This week, I'm fighting a cold. So my submission is an image taken a few weeks ago. I discovered that while my automatic flash would engage in this light, when I turned it off, I liked the pictures better. I did have to adjust the exposure a bit to compensate (gotta love cheats like iphoto!), but then I was happy with the image. I'm still figuring out much of the basic language of photography (what does the acronym ISO even stand for?!), but Amber is a real encouragement. :)

Abba!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 02:41:00 +0000

This is my testimony.

I had religion. Spirit-filled, prophetic-uttering, miracle-working, simple-church, missional religion. I had gifts. Spiritual gifts. God healed some people when I prayed for them. I prophesied. I was no stranger to the supernatural elements of the kingdom. This is normal, New Testament stuff. But I had religion. I was ultimately wrapped up in a working-relationship with God, not really grasping the Abba relationship He intended. I thought I grasped it - intellectually, I did. Experientially, even... a little.

I knew God loved me because I could point to all the evidence. I could feel His tangible presence, I could hear His voice, the miracles, the prophetic words, the stuff He was doing through me to impact others in outward ministry. And that's where I had religion. I mistakenly thought this was the evidence of His love (and the evidence of my love for Him, I might add). So what happens when winter comes and you are stripped bare? No more success, only barrenness? What then? Do we know His love in winter?

There are different seasons of life. Some are very outward in focus, and in others, God just wants to do something really, really deep and internal. There are times of drawing back into Him. And for me, I didn't really have a choice to "draw back" since He just kind of took all the spiritual gifts - or at least forced them into dormancy. I don't think I ever would've gone willingly. In winter, you have nothing to offer. Nothing. Seriously.

I felt like a failure, but God wanted to reveal His love in a place where I had nothing to offer in return. He wanted me to see His love independent of what I was doing for Him, or how He was using me. That was extremely hard for me, and the process took way longer than I would have liked.

But I don't have religion anymore. Or at least, not like I did. When you know the love of Abba in the midst of your failure, your shame, your utter dependence on Him... then you are free! And the cross cures the shame and you are restored and reconciled to Him in a way that is so foreign to your religion! I am seeing Abba in a whole new light. I am living with Abba in a whole new way.

I could only give what I had. I had religion, so when I brought others "in" - I was bringing them into religion. Yes, God was there too. But I'm glad He was merciful enough to give me a time-out for three years to transition me out of our working-relationship and into His Abba relationship.

This is so important because the nature of my relationship with Him effects the nature of my relationship with everyone else. And if that is primarily a working-relationship, then I will be more agenda-oriented than people-oriented. God is very people-oriented, not nearly as agenda-oriented as I presumed Him to be. He is love - thoroughly relational.

I love because He first loves me. How he reveals His loves to me has transformed how I love others. Revelation is everything. You cannot give what you do not have. Even Jesus said He could do nothing except by the Father. Nor can I.

So, anyway, I am super excited for the fruit that will inevitably be a natural byproduct of this deep revelation of Abba's love! Future testimonies forthcoming!

I've found this "Transition" series to be a phenomenal resource. I also enjoyed this quote:

"I realize that a book about God's love seems so obvious that most people would rather plow on to seemingly more engaging subjects, such as New Testament church models, more effective ways to pray, or keys to living in God's will. God's love seems like Christianity 101 to most people. "Let's get on to the deeper things," they'll say. But there is nothing deeper."

- Wayne Jacobsen

Dance, dance, dance

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 19:17:00 +0000

A new season has begun for us. So much life and creativity and play is bubbling up from within me.

As I'm experiencing greater and greater freedom from religious enculturation... I'm really learning that "It was for freedom that Christ set you free!"

Ha, ha, ha! Dance, dance, dance! This video captures this transition with so many mediums: music/audio, film/visual, dance/movement. Fantastic!

The artist within, who has been limited and restrained in religion, is finally getting permission to create freely and to freely enjoy creativity all around her! Look out, world! Here comes Sarah the dancer!

I was a dancer all along...

James' Journey to Jerusalem (2004)

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 16:58:00 +0000

This little film made a huge impression on me. As I was browsing the DVDs at the library, the synopsis on the back of this one pulled me in:

"A cannily droll mix of social commentary and modern fairy tale, Israeli filmmaker Ra'anan Alezandrowicz's debut feature follows the adventures of James, a devout Christian making a pilgrimage from his African village to the Holy Land. He becomes part of the migrant labor workforce in Tel Aviv and pursues his religious quest - until he gets a little taste of fortune by turning the tables on his employers. With a moving and charismatic performance by South African actor Siwabonga Melongisi Shibe, James' Journey to Jerusalem is an astute exploration of the economic, moral, and spiritual hypocrisies of Western society filtered through an evocative portrait of modern Israel's cultural and generational divisions."

It was a very thoughtful film, rich with irony. I think you'll like it. :)

Relaxed

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Sun, 31 May 2009 02:30:00 +0000

The letter to the Galatians speaks for itself:

What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn't work. So I quit being a "law man" so that I could be God's man. Christ's life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with Him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ.

My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God.

Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not "mine," but it is lived by trust in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. I am not going to go back on that. Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God's grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily.

Did you go through this whole painful learning process for nothing? It is not yet a total loss, but it certainly will be if you keep this up! Answer this question: Does the God who lavishly provides you with His own presence, His Holy Spirit, working things in your lives you could never do for yourselves, does He do these things because of your strenuous moral striving or because you trust Him to do them in you?

Galatians 2:19-21 and 3:4-5 (The Message)

Missional and the Younger Generation

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 29 May 2009 19:51:00 +0000

Interesting video! HT: The Blind Beggar

Foto Friday

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 29 May 2009 16:31:00 +0000

This week's assignment: Show me what you're learning. This triptych seems to capture some of what I've been learning lately. I've been learning:
- to live in process. To live loved no matter where I'm at in the journey.
- down is the new up. Humility is freedom.
- to slow down, really see what's around me, and enjoy it!
- life is a big, crazy adventure to be explored and embraced. :D
- to be meek. To live in total dependence and trust in my Father.

To sum up, I'm learning to become more like this little one in order to enter into the realities of the Kingdom everyday.

Why I'm Sick of Trying

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 28 May 2009 20:21:00 +0000

I'm pretty convinced that all my trying doesn't produce the real thing. When I try to be loving, try to be gracious, try to be faithful, try to save the world... I will just end up with a whitewashed tomb: looks good on the outside, lots of evidence before others of all my good-Christianess (or all my good missionalness); but it does nothing to produce real, sacrificial love that is born of the Spirit. That is supernatural. And that's the real thing. I cannot produce supernatural stuff. But God who lives in me can. So I ask.

I really only care to do that which is born of Spirit. Otherwise, all my doing and trying is pointless and will not produce the kind of eternal fruit I'm looking to achieve. So I ask.

Enough trying; more asking.

I Confess

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Wed, 27 May 2009 06:50:00 +0000

I have a confession to make. I killed my bonsai. Inadvertantly, of course - of course! And the saddest part is that I killed it while trying to nurture it! I guess that's just more evidence in favor of the old axiom: the road to hell is paved with good intentions. (I hope I'm not going to hell over this!)

So anyway, I was watering and misting the sweet little innocent tree, not even thinking about the time of day. Note to future bonsai-hobbyists: always water your tree in the early morning. Always.

I burned the leaves of my tree as the water droplets functioned like magnifying glasses in the afternoon sun. The next day, there were still a few green patches left, so I kept tending to it, hoping all was not lost. All was lost.

I'm feeling a bit guilty since it was a gift. And I ruined it. I flunked my "lesson in organic tending with a view to the long term."

Failure happens.

I've been learning a lot about failure and humanity in my own personal journey. Brokenness, imperfection, pain, deficiency, weakness... that sort of thing.

The culmination of this difficult season was a great halt. I just stopped. I stopped trying to be loving. (Gasps!) I stopped trying to be gracious (Horrors!) I stopped (double gasp) ...trying to be faithful.

I read some crazy stuff in Romans and saw it with unblinded eyes. God is messin' with me in the most beautiful way! Trying to be those things never did and never will help. It's out of my hands; it's always been in His. And in the wake of that death - the death of a "good Christian" - is coming this ridiculously relaxed person. And happy! This joy runs deep!

For some reason, the moment I stopped trying to be a Christian, I felt like I really engaged the deep reality of the Kingdom of God in a way that I never had before.

I have never felt so free, so relaxed, so at rest, and yet so alive, as I do right now. Thank God for what He can do in the midst of failure, pain, and deficiency. I am so loved. And so are you.

Btw, here are some really great posts that explore human deficiency and the Kingdom:

Out of the Darkness (from Kathy Escobar)
An Expanding Emotional Spectrum (from Jonathan Brink)
Accounting (from Kingdom Grace)
(Thanks for keepin' it real, guys! You're an inspiration!)

Foto Friday

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Sat, 23 May 2009 18:24:00 +0000

She fits in there perfectly, making it easy to "help" Daddy mow the new patch of lawn. (HT: Sharin' the Love.)

Jesus and our politics

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 21 May 2009 07:16:00 +0000

Some provocative thoughts on human nature and our propensity toward hypocrisy, especially within the context of nationalism and foreign affairs. (The video is a bit dated, and was filmed just as the 'war on terror' was commencing).

What does "Do unto others..." mean to us? Who is the "other"? Should Jesus influence the way we think about foreign policy? I think so. Lots of people disagree with me.

But we have a pretty serious problem in our national political discourse since we are unable to apply our own standards (or justification for aggression against others) to our own history.

Although the nature of torture is different than military aggression, the recent conversation regarding waterboarding is a good example of the human propensity for doublespeak. The Vietnamese were not justified in waterboarding us, but we were justified in waterboarding others. How does that work? Hypocrisy.

Foto Friday: Something Orange

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 15 May 2009 18:32:00 +0000

There's a photo hunt this week for Foto Friday. Here's something Orange.

Task-orientation is a Bummer

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 11 May 2009 17:35:00 +0000

The first time I heard the term "task-oriented" was in a YWAM course on cross-cultural ministry. This was many, many moons ago. There was a list of the orientations of different cultures, something like this:

Task oriented vs. relational oriented
Time oriented vs. event oriented
(There's more, but I don't remember the others off the top of my head)

This was the first time I became conscious of the fact that American culture is very task-oriented, and very time-oriented (extremely time-oriented, in fact. If I waste a few seconds of another American's time in the parking lot - because I'm not driving over the speed bump fast enough - I've discovered that can be a very serious offense. That's time that another driver can never get back, and I regret wasting it so thoughtlessly). Okay, maybe sarcasm doesn't suit me. Let's turn our attention now to task-orientation.

I've been trained very well in this cultural tendency, and I'm beginning to discover what a handicap it can be, especially in my approach to God and His kingdom. I'm coming to the conclusion that task-orientation has left me disabled as a believer.

In the secular culture, it's all about what we're accomplishing with our lives in terms of a career (task). The most important question people ask themselves and others is: "What kind of level of consumption have we acquired for ourselves?" As if the acquisition of products and services was our existential purpose and most important task. (Gross!)

And among followers of Jesus, whether traditional or simple churchers, whether modernists or emergents, whether attractional or missional, or some combination of the above, the big question believers ask themselves and others is: "What are we doing for God?" Let's be real about this. We're obsessed with what we are accomplishing for God. So we're no less task-oriented than the wider culture. And I'm just kind of sick of imbibing it. And I apologize for promoting that attitude here on this space. Sigh

That's not the big question God is asking us. His questions are fundamentally relational in nature. And I'm beginning to realize that my life has been an exercise in missing the point for as long as I have been task-oriented. I don't want to just have a good working-relationship with God. I long for something far more familial, and much truer to the kingdom of God. Lord, heal my disability.

His big question is the same as it was in the garden, "Where are you?" That's a relational question. My 2.5 year-old daughter is teaching me about this. She is naturally relational. She has not yet been trained in task-orientation. Nothing about being with her is task-oriented. She naturally knows a profound truth that I have grown up and lost. And she always asks that question: "Where are you?" as she walks around our little house. She just wants to be with us and that's enough.

Why Church Planting Movements Don't Happen in Christianized Lands - so far...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 07 May 2009 18:49:00 +0000

I have a lot of respect for Floyd McClung, a true father in the faith. I found his latest post to be provocative and challenging. It bestirred me. (Nice word, right?)

It's titled "Why Church Planting Movements Don't Happen in Christianized Lands - So Far."

That's it. I've got to put him back on my blogroll!

Dieter's Story

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Wed, 06 May 2009 20:13:00 +0000

Dieter's story is currently about the winter seasons of life, and God's beautiful purposes in such seasons. Go and have a read.

I think we should talk about this kind of thing much more than we do. It's not a very attractive conversation for most of us... We prefer to talk about prettier things. But in only processing the pretty things, we may miss the truly beautiful.

Pretty things don't need redemption. Pretty things don't require grace and healing. But this is the business God is in. True beauty is in redemption. Real beauty is in grace. A true, deep beauty comes from weakness, and lack, and winter. It's just one of those strange, upside-down, paradoxical truths of the Kingdom. He who loses his life shall gain it; the cross is life.

HT: Jonathan

Michael's Story

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 04 May 2009 03:37:00 +0000

The following video is a short interview with Michael Gill Gates, author of "How Starbucks Saved My Life: a Son of Privilege Learns to Live Like Everyone Else." I couldn't put this book down!

The very first chapter starts with a quote from Wynton Marsalis (the jazz musician): "The humble improve." It's a perfect synopsis of the book's overall theme. In his book, Michael chronicles his metamorphisis from an arrogant executive who easily dismissed those outside of his NYC Masters-of-the-Universe social elite, to a humble barista who began to recognize the value in each person and how easily he had squandered his previous opportunities to help others.

I worked for Starbucks briefly, and quite honestly, I never became the "true believer" in Starbucks company culture that Michael has become. He probably appreciates it so much because it's so counter-cultural to the hostile corporate culture he was accustomed to. Starbucks is a great company to work for, and operates on some great principles, but I was just never that into the religious/mantra aspect of any company culture that I worked for. My jobs generally haven't been the source of my worth and identity, although some have been much more fulfilling than others. So I felt the book was quite a plug for the Starbucks worldview; but setting that aside, the story was fascinating since it's such an unlikely and unusual one.

Michael's journey is like a living parable. His is a remarkable story of transition. He undertakes an involuntary exodus from Babylon and the culture of empire, and instead engages in a simple life where personal connection and genuine respect for people - regardless of class, race, and social rank - became much more important to him than the vanities of status and luxury consumption. Along the way, he discovers what really makes him happy. He says, "I've found more joy in serving than in being served. I'm happy for the first time in my life. Really happy."

As I read his narrative, I felt great empathy for this man who had given up (almost) his whole life, all of his talents, all of his time, and all of his God-given gifts to serve a high-powered ad agency in New York, which in the end, didn't reciprocate any of his sense of loyalty. Instead of having any time with his wife and precious children, he was immersed in a cutthroat culture of mutual disdain and competitiveness for 25 years. Empire is empire: "It's just business, it's not personal." In Revelation 18, it talks about all of the things that Babylon exploits for profit, including "human lives." As I pondered Michael's story, that verse came to mind.

Yet I'm so happy with him for his incredible good fortune in getting fired and losing that lifestyle. Now in his 60's, he has discovered meaning in life for the first time (by his own admission). He has found the joy in childlike simplicity, the joy in seeing each person as worthwhile, the joy in serving others. His is a true story of redemption. And a wonderful reminder that it is never too late in life for God to change your perspective, your priorities, your attitude, or whatever else may need changing. :)

PS. I also hear that Tom Hanks has bought the movie rights and will be playing Michael in an upcoming feature film. I look forward to that!

The Age of the Unthinkable

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 08:20:00 +0000

Greenspan testified before congress, "I have found a flaw. I don't know how significant or permanent it is. But I have been very distressed by the fact." The congressman questioning him asked, "In other words, you found that your view of the world, your ideology, was not right. It was not working?" Greenspan replied, "Absolutely. Precisely. You know that's precisely the reason I was shocked. Because I have been going for forty years or more with very considerable evidence that it was working exceptionally well."

Joshua Cooper Ramo's book, the Age of the Unthinkable, starts with the premise that complexity in world affairs is here to stay, and flexibility is key to its navigation. Sounds like a great read!

Learning from Lazarus

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 03:17:00 +0000

I've been neglecting the blog. Between tearing up the backyard and other responsible adult activities (potty training is finally being conquered!), I just haven't been writing here. Well, I've lacked inspiration. So, here's what's new:

We've been pulling up our bohemian (code for: out of control, weed-infested) garden that some previous owner had planted. (Alas, no green thumbs on any of our hands!) and attempting to turn it into a respectable patch of lawn. So far so good. The grass grows slowly, but we're watering religiously.

I'm also still in a season of deep processing with God. In the hard places, He is an oasis. After a long hibernation, or dormancy, of gifts and callings and purpose, we feel the stirring of life coming to things we thought dead. Just like a small wind blowing, nothing much yet. But it's blowing. Please pray that God's purposes will be accomplished in our lives... that we hear His direction clearly... and move with Him.

Anyway, I've also been really encouraged to hear some stories of others who have been walking through a similar experience recently, or have walked through something of this nature in their personal history with Him. Very important to know you aren't crazy and God's ways may not make sense to you, but they make perfect sense to Him. And He's trustworthy. So you might as well just go with His flow.

You know, I've been wondering about Lazurus. Why did Jesus weep with Mary when He knew that He was just about to raise Lazurus from the dead anyway? I guess He was "deeply moved" because He had real empathy for the raw loss and grief that they were experiencing.

It's kind of a weird story. First, Jesus says, "This sickness will not end in death." Then, he tells the disciples, "Lazarus is dead." For all intents and purposes, in the logic of any normal person, it appeared as though Jesus abandoned the first promise. His initial reassurance didn't seem to be panning out. Out of Jesus's own mouth - he's dead. Yet it doesn't end there. Jesus raises Lazarus, doesn't He. Promise fulfilled, God does not lie. (Feel free to keep reading while I continue to exhort myself).

Sometimes those things we think are dead ... those things that are in fact dead ... Jesus can still bring them back to life. "I AM the resurrection and the life."(John 11:25) This is not just a belief in a future manifestation of resurrection after death (even though I totally dig NT Wright's Surprised by Hope, and think this is an important topic to be recovered in our theology). Martha had that doctrinal understanding. But He clarified it for her.

It's not just future tense. My God Jesus is not stuck in the past, nor limited to some future hope. He is the God of my present, involved in my daily and yearly life. When He says "I AM the resurrection and the life" - he uses present tense of 'to be.' We have used this verse in an evangelistic sense, as if Jesus said, "I am the way to resurrection, the way to life" - and that's true (John 14:6). But not as a means to an end. More like: "This is my essence. This is part of Who I Am."

Jesus embodies resurrection. Jesus embodies life. "Embodies" doesn't capture it properly, but there are very few choices in the thesaurus for "to be" or "is." But He is the resurrection, He is the life. I've decided I believe Him on this point.

Sure, God, these dead bones can live, if You say so. Only if You say so...

Reflections on Gender

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 17:29:00 +0000

I'm ready to move on topic-wise, but there's been such great writing on this topic in the blogosphere, from a variety of perspectives. So I just wanted to link them here. Here are some of my favorites, starting with the more light-hearted and then digging into to the more serious stuff:

Sarah at Emerging Mummy wonders, "where my stitches at?" and explores the feminist reclaiming of traditional women's hobbies, such as knitting (better known by the cool kids as stitch 'n bitch). Sarah is a fantastic writer, and a real pleasure to read. She is a good representation of the new feminist. (Although not all of us bake or knit. Baking has never really interested me, but knitting? Sounds kinda fun!)

Jeff at Losing My Religion takes women (and women's issues) seriously with his post "Why the Heart of Every Man Should be Breaking." This post is like a balm. Just listening to a man validate the wound in women for the dishonor they've sufferred. It has healing properties. From reading the comments, I gather he made a lot of women cry that day, in a good way.;) And later, "Continuing the Conversation" reveals some of the mysogenist, or women-hating paradigms that have reared their ugly heads in poor interpretations of the scriptures. Women have been so deeply dishonored and sometimes deeply wounded by hearing complete garbage preached from the pulpit. The story of Eve has been particularly distorted by the influences of our Greek cultural heritage with its Pandora story... but that's another post.

Jonathan at Missio Dei announces "A Call to Men." Another fantastic post from Jonathan, who always provokes me to think differently and always stretches my perceptions. This post captures one of my favorite topics: redemption of both oppressed and oppressor. True healing and reconciliation are complete only when both are healed. Jonathan's post also links some other excellent resources and voices in this conversation.