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	<title>Adopting While Abroad</title>
	
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		<title>Russian President bans adoptions to US citizens</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AdoptingWhileAbroad/~3/uFo6AOaMqfM/</link>
		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1535#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 28 Dec 2012 20:27:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Adoption steps]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Paperwork]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1535</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[From Time Magazine, by Alexandra Sifferlin In late October, Charles and Elisabeth Smith from Phoenix traveled to Borodino, Russia, to meet their prospective son, Malcom (not his real name), a 5-year-old with cerebral palsy. “This little boy just tugged at our heart strings,” says Elisabeth. “It was not a rational response, but even when I [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>From Time Magazine, by Alexandra Sifferlin</p>
<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/russia.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1539" title="russia" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/russia.jpg" alt="" width="176" height="217" /></a>In late October, Charles and Elisabeth Smith from Phoenix traveled to Borodino, Russia, to meet their prospective son, Malcom (not his real name), a 5-year-old with cerebral palsy. “This little boy just tugged at our heart strings,” says Elisabeth. “It was not a rational response, but even when I saw his picture, he looked like my child. When I got to hold him and talk to him and be with him, it was a good fit.”</p>
<p>After accepting his referral from the orphanage, just one step in the long adoption process the Smiths started in March, they anticipated taking Malcolm home a couple months after the New Year.</p>
<p><a title="Continue reading" href="http://healthland.time.com/2012/12/28/russias-adoption-politics-defeated-families-caught-in-a-diplomatic-tailspin/" target="_blank">That family reunion is now in flux.</a></p>
<p>On Friday, Russia President Vladimir Putin signed into law a ban that would cease adoption of Russian children by American families.</p>
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		<title>Writing tips for your kids</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AdoptingWhileAbroad/~3/c1cv4MU5LVc/</link>
		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1523#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 01 Dec 2012 21:58:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Home at last]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1523</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In France they are extremely strict about handwriting. Children begin learning cursive in kindergarten and are expected to write beautifully. My daughter had some dexterity issues and still struggles to meet the high handwriting standards required by her teachers. Below is a story I found on Specialism, a website dedicated to parents of special needs [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/writing1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1524" title="writing1" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/writing1.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="200" /></a>In France they are extremely strict about handwriting. Children begin learning cursive in kindergarten and are expected to write beautifully. My daughter had some dexterity issues and still struggles to meet the high handwriting standards required by her teachers.</p>
<p>Below <a href="http://special-ism.com/4-overlooked-prewriting-features/" target="_blank">is a story</a> I found on <a href="http://special-ism.com" target="_blank">Specialism, a website dedicated to parents of special needs children</a>. I wish I had read this when my daughter was first learning how to write in cursive.</p>
<p>Handwriting is such a complex task and our students are asked to write frequently throughout their school days. Poor handwriting is one of the leading Occupational Therapy referrals in school systems. When assessing handwriting, there are many components that come into play. It is important to realize that skills build upon each other. Each skill is then used to help the next skill. For example, if a child has a poor grip we automatically want to fix the grip. However, sometimes we need to take a step back and look at what is causing the poor grip. There are four very important components of handwriting development that could be the culprit of many sloppy handwriting issues.</p>
<p>1. <strong>Posture Police</strong>! First take a look at the student’s posture. It’s really important to make sure that your children are seated at the table with their feet touching the floor. Poor posture can affect your student’s attention span because it often leads to fatigue and discomfort. It can also lead to poor grip and handwriting illegibility.</p>
<ul>
<li>Try adjusting their table/chair or put something on the floor to rest their feet.</li>
<li>Attach a piece of theraband around the legs of the desk so that the student can rest his/her feet on it.</li>
<li>If you have given your “vertically challenged” child something to rest his feet on and he keeps kicking it around the floor, then try this technique: find a top to a copy box and cut two holes in the corners of the box. Then insert the legs of the chair into the holes so that it can’t move around. This will stabilize the footrest to the chair.</li>
<li>Use a lumbar support back rest, preferably one with vibration. What do we know about vibration and muscles? Vibration stimulates muscles! So, if we lean on a vibrating back rest it will stimulate the extensor muscles in our back, which helps increase our posture.</li>
</ul>
<p>2. <strong>Shoulder Stability</strong>: If posture is under control, take a look at your student’s shoulder stability. Shoulder stability is essential in the control of our hand when writing. There are three questions you should ask yourself that can help you determine if your student exhibits poor stability in the shoulder area:</p>
<ul>
<li>Do you see movement in the arm when writing? For example, when coloring, is the whole arm moving?</li>
<li>Are you noticing a slight tremor/shakiness in the arm or hand?</li>
<li>Do they tense up their neck when cutting or doing other fine motor tasks?</li>
</ul>
<p>If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, try these suggestions:</p>
<ul>
<li>Exercise the shoulder girdle muscles. Encourage your child to perform animal walks, such as bear walking, crab walking, or army crawling on a daily basis. Practice turning a jump rope. Draw on a vertical surface, such as an easel/smart board/dry erase board/chalkboard/etc.</li>
<li>The above exercises will increase shoulder stability over time, but it won’t happen overnight. If your child is lacking shoulder stability then we need to provide strategies that provide the stability for him. For example, encourage your student to complete written work while lying on his tummy with his elbows propped on the floor (see picture).</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>Provide him with a weighted item that can be placed on his shoulder or forearm. You don’t have to go out and buy one of these items; you can easily make one by getting a large thermal sock and filling it with two bags of rice. Tie the sock at the top and <a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/writing.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-1526" title="writing" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/writing.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="179" /></a>lay it over the child’s forearm or shoulder. Take a look at this example (the student is using a homemade weighted lap pad in the right picture, which can also be used if you have one available):</li>
</ul>
<p>3. <strong>The Helping Hand</strong>: It’s also important for the helping hand (student’s non dominant hand) to be placed on the paper for stabilization. I like to use finger puppets on the helping hand. Talk to the puppet and tell it to make sure that their kid is doing their best and forming their letters correctly. Also instruct the puppet to hold the paper down. Kids think this is so silly, but it is very effective! (See picture above)</p>
<p>4. <strong>Direction of the Paper</strong>: When you take notes do you write with the bottom of the paper straight against your belly? NO! The majority of us write with the paper tilted at an angle. Just for kicks, go ahead and try writing with your paper completely vertical. It’s awkward isn’t it? You may have even noticed that you shifted your body to the right or left to accommodate the awkwardness. Although this may seem like a small change, it is very important that we are encouraging students to tilt their paper. The paper should be tilted to the same angle as the forearm of <a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/writingpaper.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-1527" title="writingpaper" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/writingpaper.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="179" /></a>their writing hand. You may have noticed that sometimes left handed students or adults hook their arm over the top of their paper. In fact, take a look at President Obama’s pencil grip at some point. If someone taught young Barack to angle the bottom of his paper towards his elbow when writing, this could have been avoided. Here is an easy solution that can be implemented for all students in a classroom. Take two pieces of masking tape or painter’s tape and make an inverted L on their desk. The paper can then fit nicely into the guidelines to encourage the student to tilt the paper. Remember, this does not have to be done for an entire school year; 1-3 weeks is usually just enough time.</p>
<p>Remember, these four components can be addressed with everyone in a classroom, not just the kids with poor handwriting!</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Cambodia lifts adoption ban for Americans</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AdoptingWhileAbroad/~3/fwPfV6J1Aek/</link>
		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1505#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 15 Nov 2012 21:09:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Adoption steps]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Paperwork]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1505</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Cambodia will end its 3 year ban on adoptions to Americans on January 1, 2013, but there will be some restrictions. Only children under the age of 8 will be allowed to be adopted and no more than 200 adoptions will be done each year, according to Long Visalo, the country&#8217;s Secretary of State. He [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/cambodia.jpg"><img class="alignleft  wp-image-1507" title="cambodia" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/cambodia.jpg" alt="" width="169" height="169" /></a>Cambodia will end its 3 year ban on adoptions to Americans on January 1, 2013, but there will be some restrictions. Only children under the age of 8 will be allowed to be adopted and no more than 200 adoptions will be done each year, according to Long Visalo, the country&#8217;s Secretary of State.</p>
<p>He did not say whether the adoption ban would be lifted for other countries.</p>
<p>According to the US Embassy in Phnom Penh, US officials have met with Cambodian officials and while they are still unable to comply with the Hague Adoption Agreement the US supports the efforts being made towards compliance.</p>
<p>Check the <a href="http://adoption.state.gov/" target="_blank">State Department&#8217;s website</a> for updates.</p>
<p>Sources: <a href="http://www.upi.com/Top_News/World-News/2012/10/30/Cambodia-reopens-adoptions-by-Americans/UPI-66621351602856/#ixzz2CJRGoqKT" target="_blank">UPI International</a>,  <a href="http://cambodia.usembassy.gov/intl_adoption2.html" target="_blank">US Embassy, Phnom Penh</a><a href="http://www.upi.com/Top_News/World-News/2012/10/30/Cambodia-reopens-adoptions-by-Americans/UPI-66621351602856/#ixzz2CJRGoqKT" target="_blank"><br />
</a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Moroccan adoptions closed to non-resident foreigners</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AdoptingWhileAbroad/~3/JY7uGunjH38/</link>
		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1477#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 07 Nov 2012 15:16:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Adoption steps]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1477</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Loubna Flah, Morocco World News Casablanca, Oct 30, 2012 The ministry of Justice and Liberties issued a circular earlier this month banning non- residents couples from adopting Moroccan children. The restriction addressed all adoption applicants who do not live permanently in Morocco. According to the Moroccan weekly La Vie Economique,  the ministry granted the [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/morocco.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-1479" title="morocco" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/morocco-150x150.jpg" alt="" width="150" height="150" /></a>By Loubna Flah, Morocco World News</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Casablanca, Oct 30, 2012</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">The ministry of Justice and Liberties issued a circular earlier this month banning non- residents couples from adopting Moroccan children. The restriction addressed all adoption applicants who do not live permanently in Morocco.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">According to the Moroccan weekly <em>La Vie Economique, </em> the ministry granted the right of parenting Moroccan children through the system known as “ Kafala” exclusively to applicants who have a permanent residency status  in Morocco. <a href="http://www.moroccoworldnews.com/2012/10/62992/ministry-of-justice-bans-foreigners-from-adopting-moroccan-children/" target="_blank">Continue reading the article here.</a></p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">The notice from the ministries states that it is difficult for the courts to ensure that conditions of the Kafala guardianship are met when the child is taken abroad by foreign parents and notes it needs to be possible for courts to cancel the guardianship in cases of failure to comply.  The Minister’s notice appears to indicate that Kafala guardianship should only be granted to Muslim families who are long-term residents in Morocco.</p>
<p>The notice states that its purpose is to ensure the implementation of the existing law.  It does not contain any provisions addressing already pending Kafala guardianship petitions.  At this time, it is unclear whether prosecutors will formally oppose petitions for Kafala guardianship decrees filed by U.S. citizens which were already pending with the Court at the <a href="http://pear-now.blogspot.fr/2012/11/dos-adoption-notice-morocco-ministry-of.html" target="_blank">time the notice was issued.</a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Racism and mixed race families</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AdoptingWhileAbroad/~3/wm_pSTWki4k/</link>
		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1457#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Oct 2011 11:24:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Home at last]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Success stories]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1457</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here&#8217;s an interesting New York Times story and video about a mixed race family that was created through adoption and marriage. It&#8217;s a beautiful story about one family focusing on love and relationships rather than race, and the struggles they have with racism. It shows that we&#8217;ve got a long way to go in terms [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/NYTIMESRACE.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1458" title="NYTIMESRACE" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/NYTIMESRACE-300x169.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="169" /></a>Here&#8217;s an interesting <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/13/us/for-mixed-family-old-racial-tensions-remain-part-of-life.html?ref=todayspaper&amp;_r=0" target="_blank">New York Times story</a> and video about a mixed race family that was created through adoption and marriage.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s a beautiful story about one family focusing on love and relationships rather than race, and the struggles they have with racism. It shows that we&#8217;ve got a long way to <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/13/us/for-mixed-family-old-racial-tensions-remain-part-of-life.html?ref=todayspaper" target="_blank">go in terms of eliminating racism.</a> The story focuses on a family in the US, but I have run across racism in France as well. And while it takes a different shape in Europe, racism exists everywhere and is something we all need to be aware of when raising adopted children.</p>
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		<title>‘Glee’ adoption plot sparks online petition</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AdoptingWhileAbroad/~3/4tf_OBIgV_c/</link>
		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1446#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Oct 2011 07:21:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Home at last]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1446</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[An adoptive mother is using an online advocacy platform to distribute a petition calling on the producers of Fox&#8217;s &#8220;Glee&#8221; to create a public service announcement that would offset what she calls &#8220;harmful&#8221; inaccuracies in an adoption-based story line. Amber Austin said she initiated the petition on Change.org because of a plotline involving cheerleader Quinn [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/glee.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1447" title="glee" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/glee.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="215" /></a>An adoptive mother is using an online advocacy platform to distribute  a petition calling on the producers of Fox&#8217;s &#8220;Glee&#8221; to create a public  service announcement that would offset what she calls &#8220;harmful&#8221;  inaccuracies in an adoption-based story line.</p>
<p>Amber Austin said she initiated the petition on Change.org because of  a plotline involving cheerleader Quinn (Dianna Agron), a teen mother  who placed her baby up for adoption. On the show, Quinn is, as the  petition puts it, &#8220;actively (and with malice)&#8221; trying to get the baby  back from adoptive mother Shelby (Idina Menzel). In a convoluted twist, Shelby is <a href="http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/showtracker/2011/10/-inaccurate-glee-adoption-plot-sparks-online-petition-.html" target="_blank">the birth mother of adopted Glee Club member  Rachel (Lea Michele).</a></p>
<p>More than 1,400 people have signed an online petition asking &#8216;Glee&#8217; creator Ryan Murphy to produce an adoption Public Service Announcement (PSA) to  counteract the fact that the show &#8220;perpetuates myths about adoption that  harm adopted children, adoptive parents, and birth parents alike.&#8221; The PSA would clarify that it is not easy to take a child away from its adoptive parents.</p>
<p>Ms. Austin told <a href="http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/fox-glee-adoption-petition-246668" target="_blank">The Hollywood Reporter</a>,  &#8220;When people are considering adoption, there is a lot of worry and  confusion about the relationship with the birth mother. I know that  &#8216;Glee&#8217; is a dramatic show, but it uses that drama to talk about  important issues like racism, homophobia and sexism. Since adoption is  such a core part of &#8216;Glee,&#8217; the producers have an opportunity to raise  awareness about how adoption really works.&#8221;</p>
<p>The petition notes that &#8220;in real, legitimate  adoptions, a birth mother cannot simply take a child away from their  family or pop back into a child&#8217;s life. &#8230; Furthermore, most adoptions  in the US are open to some extent, so these dramatic scenes with  birthmothers never take place because a relationship exists from the  start. For adopted children, the show raises the fear that they may be  taken away from their adopted families. And for adoptive parents and  birth mothers, the show creates confusion about the nature of adoption  &#8212; confusion and mistruths that proponents of adoption <a href="http://www.change.org/petitions/ask-glee-and-fox-to-separate-adoption-fact-from-fiction-produce-a-psa-about-adoption-reality" target="_blank">constantly work  to dispel</a>.&#8221;</p>
<p>What do you think? Is the Glee storyline problematic for adoptions?</p>
<p><a href="http://www.change.org/petitions/ask-glee-and-fox-to-separate-adoption-fact-from-fiction-produce-a-psa-about-adoption-reality" target="_blank">Read the petition letter here. </a></p>
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		<title>Adding a second adopted child to our home</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AdoptingWhileAbroad/~3/lbEg4LL7k5M/</link>
		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1404#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 06 Oct 2011 17:32:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Home at last]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Success stories]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1404</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A few months ago we added a fourth to our family, a wonderful 5-year-old girl who was born in West Africa. While she is adapting well and my oldest enjoys having a sister, we&#8217;ve had to deal with a myriad of issues, some of which surprised us. I am sure our experiences are not unique [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/girlsrun.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1412" title="girlsrun" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/girlsrun-212x300.jpg" alt="" width="212" height="300" /></a>A few months ago we added a fourth to our family, a wonderful 5-year-old girl who was born in West Africa. While she is adapting well and my oldest enjoys having a sister, we&#8217;ve had to deal with a myriad of issues, some of which surprised us. I am sure our experiences are not unique so I wanted to share some things I&#8217;ve learned along the way.</p>
<p><strong>Visiting the country: A family affair or a solo trip? </strong></p>
<p>If it is not required, I  strongly recommend visiting your child&#8217;s country of birth. Not only will it help you bond with your child, it will provide a lot of answers about his or her behavior and will give you with the opportunity to meet with any surviving family members if their whereabouts are known.</p>
<p>The big question is,  do you bring your other children with you or take the trip alone? When we had a court date, I spent 10 days in the country doing the legal work necessary to complete the adoption. It was great meeting our daughter and spending time with her alone. I was able to give her my undivided attention and to bond with her and she thrived.</p>
<p>But the 10 days were very difficult on our oldest back home, who is also adopted. We were worried that she would somehow feel abandoned again and would act out in ways that were unmanageable for my husband.</p>
<p>I had prepared her by repeatedly telling her that I loved her, that I was going to meet her sister and by assuring her that I would be home in 10 days. I also did things to let her know that I was thinking about her while I was away. For example, I hid little notes around the house for her to find when I was away. Sometimes I hid small treasures along with the notes. Once she found a piece of bubble gum wrapped in a note with hearts all over it. Since she is rarely allowed to chew gum, it was a great surprise and a big treat for her.</p>
<p>I also gave my husband a small toy that I knew she would love and told him to give it to her on a day when she was feeling down. Sure enough, one day she was on the verge of a meltdown and told my husband she was worried I wasn&#8217;t coming home. He gave her the gift and it worked its magic. She called me to thank me immediately and then ran to the park to show her friends.</p>
<p>But by the end of my trip, the notes and small gifts had lost their magic and the only thing she wanted was for her mother to come home.</p>
<p><strong>A family trip</strong></p>
<p>For a variety of reasons &#8212; including that we didn&#8217;t know how long it would take to get a visa and feared our oldest would not be able to handle another separation  &#8212; we decided make the trip to bring our daughter home a family vacation.</p>
<p>The first few days as a family of 4 were spent at the orphanage and in a hotel nearby. We spent a few hours a day with our daughter&#8217;s friends at the orphanage and the rest of the time coloring and playing at the hotel. When we felt she was ready to say goodbye, we went sight-seeing around the country.</p>
<p>We spent the first week at a beach resort and the rest of the time traveling. We had a great time and the girls had a carefree and fun environment in which they were able to learn how to become sisters.</p>
<p>However, as expected, our oldest had some mixed emotions about being back in her country of birth. Despite our best efforts to prepare her,  she was surprised and upset by the poverty she saw. She loved being a big sister but she was also jealous and didn&#8217;t like sharing her parents. The myriad of conflicting emotions she experienced confused and upset her.</p>
<p>With time she was able to see the beauty and kindness of the people of her country and she learned we didn&#8217;t love her any less because we had another daughter.</p>
<p>Our youngest learned to be a part of our family in a setting that was familiar to her. When you are used to being able to do whatever you want, it is a shock to have someone suddenly tell you what you can and cannot do.  It helped that we were in her country during her adjustment period and she had something that felt comfortable and easy. And while it was not an easy trip, it was a valuable one.</p>
<p><strong>Back home<a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/walking.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-1422" title="walking" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/walking-277x300.jpg" alt="" width="277" height="300" /></a></strong></p>
<p>My biggest fear about adding to our family was that our oldest would regress and our youngest would be difficult to manage during her transition to life in France. Much to my dismay, this is exactly what happened. Having two children is an adjustment. Having two children who are acting up and acting out is frustrating, exhausting and, at times, humiliating &#8212; I&#8217;ve had a lot of disapproving looks from neighbors who don&#8217;t understand why my child or children are screaming or stomping or crying.</p>
<p>I read that sometimes when one child  misbehaves, the other tries to compensate by behaving like an angel. In my case, the opposite happened. When one got upset or frustrated or threw a tantrum, the other joined in. Every once in a while I had two out of control little ones and no idea how to calm them down. Sometimes I did well and was able to calm them without too much trouble. Other times I made mistakes that I tried to learn from (hint: yelling doesn&#8217;t work).</p>
<p>What I learned is that sometimes you have to let the tantrum run its course and deal with it afterward. Get the kids home or in your car if you&#8217;re out and let them wear themselves out.  When they have calmed down, you can discuss what happened and come up with ways to prevent it from happening again. I had to do this six or seven times so plan on being patient, repeating the lessons and reminding them what they said they would do if they felt a tantrum coming on.</p>
<p>Now if the youngest seems on the verge of a tantrum, my oldest will say, &#8220;quick, we have to put on some music and dance, she said that will help her.&#8221; The youngest does the same when the oldest is cranky. It doesn&#8217;t always work, but it&#8217;s nice that they try to help each other.</p>
<p><strong>Stay on message</strong></p>
<p>It&#8217;s also important that you and your partner stay on message with the children during the first few months. Be clear about what is acceptable and what is not. Set rules and stick to them. Discipline to teach, but make sure the punishment fits the crime and that the lesson is clear. And remember, your newest addition may not understand you as well as you think. Make sure what you are trying to say is what is being understood. This is especially important if English is not the child&#8217;s first language.</p>
<p><strong>One-to-one time</strong></p>
<p>Something I realized early on is it was very difficult for me to spend time alone with our oldest daughter. Our youngest was clingy and not fully comfortable with my husband and anytime I went out, she was with me. I could see it upset our oldest so my husband and I decided to make sure we each spent time alone with each of the children. Once a week I take the oldest to her piano lesson and we spend a few hours together afterward.  I try to make the time fun and easy so we can laugh and talk. For example, once we went on a short boat ride, another day we went to a music store and then out to lunch at her favorite restaurant.</p>
<p>My husband takes the opportunity to spend quality time with our youngest. As a result, we&#8217;ve both been able to bond more fully with both our children and open the lines of communication between all of us.</p>
<p><strong>Time alone</strong></p>
<p>And finally, I have to admit that I really miss having time for myself. I still haven&#8217;t managed to find a lot of time, but I now do set aside at least 10 minutes for myself every day. I have also given up some of the things I did when I had just one child. I no longer belong to the PTA (which is actually a relief). While I will attend most of my daughter&#8217;s soccer games this year, I will skip some. And I will not go on every school trip like I&#8217;ve done in the past. I divide my time evenly between the kids, but I now factor myself into the equation more than I did before.</p>
<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/talking.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1427" title="talking" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/talking-300x200.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="200" /></a>Raising two is harder than raising one and it&#8217;s more than twice the work because you have so many different things to consider. But it is so worth it. Both our girls are now thriving. And while we are more tired than before, we also laugh more.</p>
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		<title>Foreigners cannot adopt Ukranian children younger than five years old</title>
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		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1393#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 26 May 2011 12:12:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Adoption steps]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1393</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine (the Supreme Parliament of Ukraine) amended adoption law in the country on May 19, 2011. The changes to the Family Code of Ukraine include the following: * Any child who is a citizen of the Ukraine may be adopted by a foreigner if he or she has been registered with [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/rada.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1395" title="rada" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/rada.jpg" alt="" width="250" height="124" /></a>The Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine (the Supreme Parliament of Ukraine) amended adoption law in the country on May 19, 2011. The changes to the Family Code of Ukraine include the following:</p>
<p>* Any child who is a citizen of the Ukraine may be adopted by a foreigner if he or she has been <strong>registered with adoption and/or child protection authorities for</strong> <strong>at least one year  and is at least 5 years old.</strong></p>
<p>*<strong> </strong>Adoptions will not be granted to people who need consistent medical care.</p>
<p>* Adoptions will not be granted unless both parents meet the requirements (no criminal record, etc.)<strong><br />
</strong></p>
<p>The exceptions are:</p>
<p>* A child is younger than 5 can be adopted by a relative</p>
<p>* A child with an illness that is deemed life threatening by the Ministry of Health of the Ukraine may be exempted from the new rule.</p>
<p>* Foreigners who wish to adopt a siblings may do so if one sibling is at least 5 and has been registered with adoption and/or child protection services for at least one year.</p>
<p>The corresponding bill is registered under number 7332.</p>
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		<title>Adoption advice for Australians living overseas</title>
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		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1379#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Apr 2011 07:37:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[By Jerrie Alp, Hong Kong Adopting while living overseas can be very challenging. There are no guidelines to follow and you can often feel like you are trying to work things out all on your own. The most important thing you can do is research, research and more research…and where there wasn’t a way before [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/australian-flag.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1387" title="australian flag" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/australian-flag-300x200.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="200" /></a>By Jerrie Alp, Hong Kong</strong></p>
<p>Adopting while living overseas can be very challenging. There are no guidelines to follow and you can often feel like you are trying to work things out all on your own. The most important thing you can do is research, research and more research…and where there wasn’t a way before you will find one.</p>
<p>Below you’ll find some key steps and considerations that you need to keep in mind as an Australian Expat adopting while living overseas. Please note this only my understanding. There may be parts that have changed under new rules but you&#8217;ll see there are link references where you can check for the latest information.</p>
<p>The key steps are:</p>
<p><strong>Find out if the country / government where you live</strong> will allow you to either adopt locally or from overseas and the relevant rules thereof e.g. immigration rules for bring adopted child in.</p>
<p><strong>Identify the country you want to adopt from</strong> and the relevant rules/processes/agencies/contacts within that country. This would include who can do your home study.</p>
<p><strong>Establish contact with the relevant Australian Consulate</strong> in the city you live in (will adopt from). Initially to gain your letter of no objection and later to apply for your child’s adoption visa, citizenship and passport.</p>
<p><strong>Collect all relevant documents</strong> for dossier and home study.</p>
<p><strong>Submit adoption application either locally or overseas</strong> via facilitator, lawyer or agency.</p>
<p><strong>Work through the process. </strong>Once adoption is complete, ensure you have documents/applications in place to gain entry visa or dependents visa for your child to get into the country you will live in.</p>
<p><strong>If you haven’t already done so, apply for adoption visa</strong> and then later – citizenship and Australian passport.</p>
<p>More detailed information:</p>
<p><strong>A. The Country You will live in / adopt from. </strong>Where you adopt from and how you go about it depends a lot on the country you will be adopting from:</p>
<p>In some countries you can adopt locally. E.g. adopt locally while living in Hong Kong. Each country will have their own rules re prerequisites (e.g. how long you need to live there first) or requirements (e.g. age, marital status).</p>
<p>Some countries have locally based agencies that can assist you to adopt from other countries. E.g. In Hong Kong ISS (International Social Services) assist with adoptions from Thailand, Philippines, China, India and Russia.</p>
<p>Using an agency based overseas. In some cases you can use an agency based overseas (usually an American one) which will assist you to complete an adoption from another country. In these cases they will either fly in a social worker to complete your home study or if there are independent and accredited social workers where you live you might be able to use them.</p>
<p>Private adoptions – where you can not use local services or agencies you can do a private adoption where you directly hire a social worker to complete the home study and communicate directly with an orphanage either with someone at the orphanage or via a facilitator or solicitor. All court proceedings are usually managed by your lawyer / facilitator.</p>
<p>Local Immigration rules. Each country has it&#8217;s own immigration policies as to how dependent adopted children can gain access/ a visa to reside in the same country as their adoptive parents. Find out what your local immigration rules are for bringing in your adopted child before you start the adoption process. For example in Hong Kong, we are supposed to apply for our child&#8217;s &#8220;dependant visa&#8221; once the adoption is complete &#8211; while still in the country of adoption. We need to provide evidence of a genuine relationship between applicant &amp; sponsor; we have to show that we can financially support the dependant and show that there is no known record to the detriment of the dependent/applicant. This process  can take up to 6 weeks. In some cases/countries you can first apply for a tourist visa (in a matter of days) &amp; then apply for a change in status once back home). This is what we did.</p>
<p><strong>B. Identify the Country you want to adopt from.</strong> Some people have a very specific country they want to adopt from and others are open to where they adopt from. Some of this depends on where you live and adopt from and the rest of it is down to a lot of research as to what programs are open and possible for you as an Australian living overseas.</p>
<p>I found it very useful to look at the U.S. Department of State website. It not only talks about the basics of intercountry adoption, but also explains the Hague Convention and lists adoption information by country including the key rules for adopting from that country and sometimes has the relevant contacts. You can usually exchange the US immigration rules with the Australian immigration rules&#8230;the general US state intercountry adoption page is:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.adoption.state.gov/" target="_blank">http://www.adoption.state.gov/</a></p>
<p>You can also look up the country specific information here.</p>
<p>For e.g  Ethiopia:</p>
<p><a href="http://adoption.state.gov/country_information/country_specific_info.php?country-select=ethiopia" target="_blank">http://adoption.state.gov/country_information/country_specific_info.php?country-select=ethiopia</a></p>
<p>There is some really useful information. For e.g. there are contact details for MOWA – the ministry that handles adoptions in Ethiopia.</p>
<p>Some of the key countries that people are adopting from at the moment (only from what I have heard) are Russia, China, Ethiopia, Philippines, India, Thailand, Ukraine and Poland. Many countries allow you to adopt locally and usually have residency requirements.</p>
<p>Another great reference is the Joint Council of Children’s Services. This website usually has up to date information on which programs are open, which are experiencing delays etc</p>
<p><a href="http://www.jointcouncil.org/" target="_blank">http://www.jointcouncil.org/</a></p>
<p><strong>Home Study / Dossier Component for Australians</strong></p>
<p>Most home studies contain the following information:<br />
Your suitability as adoptive parents<br />
Description of where you live<br />
Background clearances<br />
Financial information<br />
Medical certificates<br />
Marriage certificates (or dissolution certificates) if relevant<br />
Birth certificates<br />
Reference letters<br />
Power of attorney letters</p>
<p><strong>All these documents either need to be certified copies provided by the relevant authority</strong> (e.g Births Deaths and Marriages) or authenticated as required (see below on notarisations and apostille). Note you don’t want to start this process too early / before finding your contacts / agency as most documents have a ‘valid period’ and may need to be re-issued.</p>
<p>Some countries have semi-government bodies who can conduct home studies. In most cases, I believe Australians use an independent social worker if they cannot use an adoption agency&#8217;s social worker. There is a document under the Files section for Asia (within the Australian Expat Adoption Yahoo group) that lists some of the current home study suppliers in Asia. The best thing to do is to find out if there are any local providers first and then start looking at flying someone in. The American forums for adopting while overseas also have a lot of information and sometimes posts on there can connect you with a local social worker. If you are working with an agency, they usually have someone on their books.</p>
<p><strong>* A special note I want to make here is about post-placement requirements.</strong> Some countries (if I remember correctly like Russia) require post-placement reports that can extend into two years after the child has been adopted. This is all fine if you are still living overseas but parents need to watch this part if they intend and declare that they will move back to Australia during this period. In Australia, adoptions are managed by state government bodies. The adoption authority in the adoption country may ask for documentation which shows that the parents will be able to provide post-placement reports once back in Australia.</p>
<p><strong>* Police checks.</strong> In some cases you need to provide criminal clearances for the last 5-10 years.  Criminal clearances for the country of residence &#8211; in some countries Australians can apply directly to the local police authorities. In other countries, such as Hong Kong this can only be done in conjunction with the relevant Australian Consulate i.e. The parents ask the Australian Consulate to write to the police authorities to help them get a criminal clearance report as some police authorities generally provide this service for immigration purposes. Criminal clearances for Australians for their time in Australia are applied for via the Australian Federal Government. The relevant application form &amp; information can be accessed at this link:<br />
<a href="http://www.afp.gov.au/what-we-do/police-checks/national-police-checks.aspx" target="_blank"> http://www.afp.gov.au/what-we-do/police-checks/national-police-checks.aspx</a></p>
<p><strong>* Notarisation &amp; Apostilles:</strong> For most documents which were sourced in Australia or which needed to be signed by references or accountants in Australia, I had these notarised and apostilled in Australia by a licensed Notary Public. Explanations of this process in Australia can be found at these two links.<br />
<a href="http://www.notarylocator.com.au/notariesExplained.php" target="_blank"> http://www.notarylocator.com.au/notariesExplained.php</a><br />
<a href="http://www.notarylocator.com.au/notariesApostilles.php" target="_blank"> http://www.notarylocator.com.au/notariesApostilles.php</a></p>
<p>For documents sourced in Hong Kong or where I had the originals in Hong Kong I had these processed in Hong Kong via a solicitor who is a licensed notary.</p>
<p><strong>C.  Australian Government / Australian Visas. </strong></p>
<p>As far as I understand the following applies to all Australians regardless of which overseas country they live in. They need to ask the Australian Consulate or Australian foreign office where they are living for a letter that is generally called a  &#8221;Letter of No Objection&#8221; for them to adopt from their nominated country. Also, most agencies / adoption authorities also require some form of acknowledgment from the Australian Government that there is a process in place which allows Australians to adopt while living overseas and that they can get citizenship for their adopted child.</p>
<p>I think getting this letter is wise even if it is not asked for so that you can ensure your foreign office is going to be co-operative when it comes to applying for your child&#8217;s Australian citizenship and passport. This letter just ensures that you as an Australian Citizen understand / satisfy the following criteria (this is taken from our letter):<br />
&#8221; A foreign child adopted without the involvement of an Australian adoption authority by an Australian citizen or permanent resident must meet the following legal requirements in order to be granted permanent entry to Australia:</p>
<p><strong>1. the adoptive parent has been residing outside Australia for at least 12 months</strong>, and that residence was not for the purpose of adopting a child (i.e. later when applying for your child&#8217;s citizenship, you must provide a written statement outlining reasons for the adoptive parent&#8217;s residence overseas. Part of the reason for this is to show that you did not move overseas to circumvent the adoption queue / system in Australia &#8211; which is currently run by the government &amp; is very lengthy when adopting from overseas).<br />
<strong>2. the adoption of the child has taken place in accordance</strong> with the adoption laws of the child&#8217;s country.<br />
<strong>3. the adoption order grants full &amp; permanent parental rights</strong> to the adoptive parent.<br />
<strong>4. the authorities of child&#8217;s country agree to the child migrating to Australia</strong>.<br />
<strong>5. the child is under 18 &amp; meets health &amp; character requirements for entry to Australia.</strong> [Health checks must be made and examination forms must be provided as part of your Australian visa application. The Australian Government provides a list of doctors (in your relevant country) approved by Australian Authorities who can conduct medical examinations].</p>
<p>If your citizenship application is denied for health reasons or because the Australian Consulate believes your adoption was not completed legally or the child has been trafficked &#8211; you face a long battle and may be stuck living overseas till the situation is resolved. Hence I think it&#8217;s important that all prospective adoptive parents obtain this letter and fully understand the Australian Government&#8217;s requirements.</p>
<p>In terms of the process for applying for Australian Citizenship, the current provisions are that unless the child is adopted under full Hague Convention provisions, the child must be initially sponsored by the parents for a Permanent visa (also called Adoption Visa). In some cases I have heard of families getting this visa within weeks and in others &#8211; like ours &#8211; it took ten months, as there was no Australian consulate in the country we adopted from and they had to request the Moscow office to verify the legitimacy of our adoption.</p>
<p>Once your child has their permanent visa – they can travel in and out of Australia or live in Australia.<br />
After the child acquires a Permanent visa / Adoption Visa, you then apply for Citizenship by Conferral for the Child. See below. It is after this that the child can apply for their Australian passport.<br />
<a href="http://www.citizenship.gov.au/" target="_blank"> http://www.citizenship.gov.au/</a></p>
<p>Information about child migration where a child has been adopted can be found at:<br />
<a href="http://www.immi.gov.au/allforms/booklets/1128.pdf" target="_blank"> http://www.immi.gov.au/allforms/booklets/1128.pdf</a></p>
<p>The last time I looked, the above two links include all the Australian Government laws, rules &amp; forms Australians need to be aware of when completing an adoption overseas. It is very worthwhile becoming familiar with this information.</p>
<p><strong>Adoption Education</strong></p>
<p>In some countries, local agencies (some government based) provide adoption education. These are usually very useful in helping you prepare for adoption and you usually meet other families going through the same thing as you are. If there are no local services you can do some training online – we were required to do this as part of our home study and present the relevant completion certificates. Adoption Learning Partners provides some great courses – some of them are free:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.adoptionlearningpartners.org/index.cfm" target="_blank">http://www.adoptionlearningpartners.org/index.cfm</a></p>
<p>The courses I got the most out of where:</p>
<p>With Eyes Wide Open &#8211; A preparation for international adoption<br />
The Journey of Attachment<br />
Lets Talk Adoption</p>
<p>I hope this helps. Best wishes on your adoption Journey.</p>
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		<title>New Requirements for China Adoptions</title>
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		<comments>http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1363#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 29 Mar 2011 19:46:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lisa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Adoption steps]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://whileabroad.com/adoption/?p=1363</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[China has announced new requirements for adoptions, which will make adopting for expats very difficult. The requirements include six post-adoption follow-ups that must be done by a social worker. HOME STUDIES FOR CHINA ADOPTIONS 1. Home Study assessments must be done by Hague accredited agencies. Home Studies written by non-Hague approved agencies will not be [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/chinaflag.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1364" title="chinaflag" src="http://whileabroad.com/adoption/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/chinaflag-300x197.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="197" /></a>China has announced new requirements for adoptions, which will make adopting for expats very difficult. The requirements include six post-adoption follow-ups that must be done by a social worker.</p>
<p>HOME STUDIES FOR CHINA ADOPTIONS<br />
1. Home Study assessments must be done by Hague accredited agencies. Home Studies written by non-Hague approved agencies will not be accepted.</p>
<p>2.Home Study reports must include at least 3 reference letters, as<br />
attachments to the Home Study. MAA will provide our clients with more<br />
details about what is required in these letters.</p>
<p>3. The Home Study Social Worker will determine if the applicants should have a professional psychological evaluation for the Home Study. The evaluation will be required if either adoptive parent (a) has received counseling or therapy in the past; (b) are currently receiving counseling or therapy; (c) have potential emotional problems, such as history of alcohol abuse, history of mental or physical abuse, or suffered emotional loss or trauma. The Social Worker can also determine if there are other reasons to require the psychological evaluation.</p>
<p>4. The Adoption Training requirement will increase to 12 hours, and should include participation in an adoptive parent support group. MAA will provide our clients with more details about what is required to meet this new training requirement.</p>
<p>These new Home Study requirements will apply to all new adoptions that are initiated after October 1, 2011.</p>
<p>POST PLACEMENT REPORTING FOR CHINA ADOPTIONS</p>
<p>1. Post Placement Reports must be done by Hague accredited agencies.</p>
<p>2. A total of six (6) reports must be submitted after the adoption. The<br />
reports will be due at 1 month, 6 months, and 12 months. Additional<br />
reports will be due at 2 years, 3 years, and 5 years after the adoption<br />
(unless the child turns 18 years old before the report is due). MAA will<br />
provide our clients with more details about what is required to meet<br />
this new reporting requirement.</p>
<p>3. Each Post Placement Report must include a minimum of 8 photographs of<br />
the child showing his/her current life and family.</p>
<p>These new Post Placement requirements will apply to all families who<br />
receive their Travel Approval after August 1, 2011.</p>
<p>CCAA includes in this notice that they plan to visit adopted children in<br />
the USA and will arrange more &#8220;heritage&#8221; tours to China. **Please note -<br />
CCAA can only visit your family with your approval. They do not have the<br />
authority to take an adopted child away from a family. CCAA plans to<br />
work with agencies to arrange visits to families and they hope to<br />
understand the living conditions and adjustment of the children who are<br />
coming here from China.</p>
<p>The other requirements in this CCAA notice relate to the work that<br />
agencies do and our reporting requirements for CCAA. Clearly, this will<br />
create more work for agencies, but it is CCAA&#8217;s hope that these new<br />
requirements will help families and children adjust after the adoption<br />
and prevent adoption dissolutions in the future.</p>
<p>More information is expected soon.</p>
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