Adventures in Ctrl+Alt+Del

Eating Out is Dumb and Takes a Toll on You...

2014-06-17T11:14:00.000-04:00

When we last saw our fearless adventurer he'd just been heartbroken by a girl he had thought and planned to spend the rest of his days with. He was hurt and confused and driven 12+ hours straight through (stopping only for gas,) from MD to FL in order to NOT be in MD for a moment longer.

Pretty much what the drive felt like Source

So I am newly returned to FL after leaving only 6 months prior. At this point....I start to get low. Like REALLY low. In my head I'm 33 years old, divorced and have three children to take care of...not exactly the hottest ticket for lots of single females. I'm also stuck dealing with the fact that something that had seemed SOOOOOO sure, turned out to be the exact opposite.

Of course in all this...I'm not trying to say that I made ALL the right choices. I did selfishly decide to quit my job (you know....the REASON I was waiting to go up to MD in the first place,) because it made me so UTTERLY miserable that I would go to work and not eat or drink anything for 12 hours. HORRIBLE. I've never had a job that I have hated THAT much before in my life.

My general attitude towards that job.... Source

But I digress...my lack of money and financial contribution was the ultimate reason for the break up. Either that or she had stopped loving me and was talking with her Ex, with whom she is now back in a relationship with despite her insistence that she doesn't do second chances.

I was back from MD....back with heartbreak and sad emotions. The room I'd had before I left for MD was packed to the gills with boxes and stuff that my parents couldn't find a home for. There was LITERALLY a path from the door to the bed. I couldn't even access the dresser or put clothes away.....I was a visitor in my own 'home'.

I was a sad panda... Source

It was at this point I went full on Emo. Right on down to breaking out the Dashboard Confessional on my iTunes. There was lots of time during the next two weeks full of sobbing uncontrollably when I was alone at night. Lots of really dark and scary thoughts running through my head. It started to become a vicious circle of not wanting to be happy but being tired of feeling depressed.

Having been the 'victim' of unexpected breakup before, I had already had some experience of the types of thoughts and stuff that was going through my head. But at that time I was 20 and had my whole life ahead of me. This time around I was 33 and had my fair share of 'baggage' and things that made the future seem VERY obsolete to me.

So I sat there and on several occasions contemplated my own existence and recounted the reasons for why I should or should not live on this planet anymore.

So to recap....there was driving, sadness and Dashboard Confessional. Which brings me to an interesting nick name for the next time I feel sad and blue. Jumping ahead a bit....I met a lady. And during the course of talking with her about my breakup I decided to say that the next time I felt REALLY down...I wouldn't use the term depressed. Instead, since Dashboard Confessional was part of my music when I'm super sad post-break up (and because Chris Carrabba is the lead singer of the group.) We would just say I was "eating at Carrabba's" as the term for my sadness.

As I came to terms with my breakup (and by terms I mean that I would have to date again.) I quickly began to feel the anxiety attack build in my chest. I'm 33....I'm OLD! I don't know if I can/want to do the internet dating. I'm also very shy.....I have a hard time going out of my comfort zone with people I don't know. I don't like rejection.....so talking to someone out of the blue is also out of the question.

So where the heck can someone like me find quality people to ask out on dates?

Where I work there are some single ladies....and those ladies go on dates. They get those dates from the interwebs. Sites like match.com, Okcupid.com, eHarmony.com....all the interweb sites. So I had a starting point. However, because the breakup was still fresh and hurt a bunch...I just made a profile on match and OkCupid and just left them there. Not ready to reach out....not ready for awkward dates with people I just met.

Actual first date footage of myself..... Source

During all this boo-hoo, woe is me stuff my friends acted as an AMAZING support system for me. If I wanted to lay on their couch and just exist while they did their thing.....they let me do it. They did their best to make sure I was out and about doing things and not sitting around wallowing in my own self pity.

Then one weekend....I had dinner with a work friend and her boyfriend where, prior to his arrival she and I got to talk about things and how it had all went down. She basically told me her thoughts on it all and left it at that. Her words were honest and seemed to strike a cord with me. The next day on Saturday I met up with another co-worker, who also was going through a sudden break-up. I spent half of that day laying on her couch and laying on her just watching TV. I still don't know what changed for me that weekend but I know on Monday I had a drive and motivation to BE better. Something about being told the way it was and being lazy with another human made me feel like things could and WOULD get better for me.

So that Monday I decided to really hit the internet dating scene on the ground and running. Which meant making the profiles and filling out the information to 'find love'. I was going to use Match.com....but they thought it a good idea to charge money to see messages from interested parties.....ummmm yea...no thanks. NEXT! OkCupid apparently is where it was gonna have to happen....all free, no need to pay to see messages.

Spent a good bit of time looking at profiles and trying to find women I found attractive and that also seemed to have an interesting personality that matched my own. Several potential matches were found and messages were sent out. A new life was beginning for me....one with internet dates......

JOIN US NEXT TIME AS OUR INTREPID HERO VENTURES OUT INTO THE REAL WORLD TO MEET A REAL GIRL FROM THE REAL INTERNET.....

Oh god.....blind first date.......... Source

Love lost, Life gained....

2014-06-15T14:45:00.000-04:00

I don't really write a lot on this blog. I honestly don't have a lot to 'blog' about when it comes to my life. I don't often have the time to sit down and recount my life experiences or write a summation of what has taken place with my life.

At least not always. I feel like I'm too busy enjoying life or working to sit down and recount what has taken place. That and I'm not really that interesting. My life basically consists of 1) Wake up. 2) Shower, brush teeth, empty bladder etc. 3) Contemplate eating breakfast 4) Skip eating breakfast 5) Depending on the day....head to work or kill a little bit of time before work with household chores and getting things ready to go to work. 6) Actual work 7) Hoping I don't have to work 4 unexpected hours 8) Driving home to repeat the entire process back over again.

A fairly accurate portrayal of my daily life. Source

As you can see not really a lot of drama or crazy happenings to this old goat.

But here I am...sitting at work....bored out of my mind. Looking for an outlet of sorts. It's been a strange year since the last time I visited this writing space. When we last saw our hero he was struggling with stuff related to me. Since that time my girlfriend of almost 5 years decided that she couldn't handle dealing with all the things related to me (i.e. my lack of money situation due to child support and alimony.)

Waiting for something to happen.... Source

We had been together in a long distance relationship for a very long time. SUPER long. Longer than I think any reasonable individual would let them stay in a long distance relationship. Mostly due to factors outside of our control. I was getting a divorce from someone who was remarkably difficult to deal with. She was in the military and overseas in a location that wasn't really feasible for me to live. Then when she was stateside there was the issue of trying to find a job so that I could take care of my financial obligations related to my divorce.

In January of last year she had SERIOUS doubts about the viability of us working as a couple. I, naively, thought that mutual love and caring for one another would help us overcome her fears and trepidation about how certain aspects of our relationship would work out (i.e. money issues...or lack of money for me.) CLEARLY looking back at events and things throughout the relationship I should have more attentive and recognized warning signs along the way. She had NO want to live in Florida (I was ok with this as long as we could potentially live a reasonable distance from FL.) When we started talking about living together in MD...she used the phrase 'Roommates' to describe how things would be handled.

Just lots of things that through hindsight, seem like OBVIOUS reasons to call her dedication to our relationship into question. Now before you get all 'whoa, whoa, whoa' on me...I do realize that pretty much anytime a relationship fails...there is normally equal blame shared. However, after chatting with her post break up she told me:

but my problem wasn't your PROBLEMS. it was the circumstances. And i think with time, sure they can be changed, potentially, but I can see that being a struggle.

Circumstances.....

cir·cum·stance

>noun

1. a fact or condition connected with or relevant to an event or action.
"we wanted to marry but circumstances didn't permit"
2. one's state of financial or material welfare.
"the artists are living in reduced circumstances"

They had pretty much been the same since day one. Sans that when we met I was married. But still I had kids....still was going to have to pay child support. Those never changed. And yet I'm to believe that is the sole reason why she fell out of love with me.

What made the breakup hard is that in talking with her....she had given up MONTH'S earlier and had more or less been lying to my face each time I told her I loved her, or held her tightly or kissed her lips. I know she denies it...but I'm quite sure now, that she had made the decision to move on LONG before she gave up and she just didn't have the strength needed to address things head on, which really hurts because we had prided ourselves on being open with communication and talking about all the hard and difficult things....I wish I knew what happened to that.....

So in my head things can and SHOULD be worked through when you are in a committed relationship with another person. You are basically making an unspoken pact with that person to stand by them and struggle through all the things easy AND difficult. It's the struggle that makes you the couple....not just the good times. I thought she knew that...she told me she had.....I was gravely mistaken.

I see now the error of my judgement.... Source

Really I'm just a bitter pants that doesn't handle rejection well (it's the second time I've been dumped out of the blue.) and I want to be angry with her and at the same time get closure to everything that happened. But I know that won't happen because I don't care enough to ever really seek it.....I've moved on with my life...as she has also done

JOIN US FOR OUR INTREPID ADVENTURE'S NEXT ADVENTURE WHERE HE EAT'S AT CARRABBA'S AND THROWS HIMSELF INTO INTERNET DATING....

Yea! You tell 'em Jay and Silent Bob.... Source

Things are getting weird in here...

2013-07-08T03:25:00.001-04:00

So it's been a LONG, LONG time since I posted anything here. I guess I thought I was gonna have more to say about life in general...turns out I don't have much of a voice. I struggle with things on a daily basis. Some of it very close to home (my own insecurities) other things outside forces that can not be changed or influenced (trying to get a job in MD.)

Lot has happened. since the last time I wrote. My Grandfather passed away at the age of 88. I became officially divorced. And I've developed this nasty habit of staying up till about 3 or 4 in the morning doing nothing more than wallowing in self pity. I hate it. But yet I do nothing to change it. It's quite frustrating.

I contemplate stuff at 32 that I figured I'd be more inclined to worry about at 82. Like my own mortality. Reflecting back on life and how things have turned out for me and others that I knew. Coming to the realization that I don't have as many close friends that I would like to have. Realizing I don't really have any REAL friends (in the spending time with each other outside of work kinda way.)

Not sure when I'll post again....I will keep you posted on that blog...(you see what I did there?)

This one time I went all colonial and stuff

2011-11-22T16:04:00.001-05:00

Took a trip up to Maryland around the Lexington Park area. While up there stopped by Historic St. Mary's City and enjoyed walking around the early American Settlement. I enjoyed how they have houses framed out around the area. It was nice to get an idea of just how spread out everything was at that time.

So there I was knee deep in Netflix...

2011-10-12T21:31:00.000-04:00

It has been said that I am a bastion of useless knowledge. This is something that has been repeated many times before, it is nothing new to me. But just the other day I found myself seeking out new and useless information.

There we were Netflix and myself alone on the web, just the two of us. As I was scanning over the page I was curiously wondering what kinds of jobs Netflix was hiring for, not because I was looking to change jobs but I really wanted to know what jobs they had. So I clicked on the link and saw a LOT of jobs out in Los Gatos, CA. Letting my curiosity get the better of me I went to Google maps to see where exactly Los Gatos is located.

I found it just to the South of San Jose. So I figured why stop there and gave myself a quick orientation to California in general. This continued until I had illegally into Oregon. At which point I noticed the swath of population in Eugene/Salem/Portland area of Oregon vs the sheer emptiness found in the rest of the state.

Oregon went by quickly and soon I was knee deep in Washington State's Google Maps areas. It was a fun opportunity to take a look at Mt. Rainier, which I got to visit in 2009 while I was training at Ft. Lewis. This was where things turned a little "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie-ish".

While I was looking at the mountain I remembered how cool it was that I could Mt. St. Helens from the peak that we were on. I also remembered how the guide said that it was VERY unusual to see Mt. St. Helens so clearly from where we were.

Already being logged into Netflix and now having a hungry appetite for all things Volcano related I then decided it would be a great time to watch a documentary about Mt. St. Helens. And in a click of a mouse I was instantly transformed into an 8 year old. Mount St. Helens: Back from the Dead was my first victim. that was merely the milk mustache that made me look in the mirror and reminded me I wanted to cut my hair. Next was, National Geographic: Volcano: Nature's Inferno, which was even cooler than the first one because it has all sorts of neat shots of Lava shooting up into the air. My inner 8 year old was VERY appreciative of this film.

Now, while I could have/should have stopped with two back to back documentaries about volcano's I did not. Because while I'm in the midst of watching the films I'm also on wikipedia learning all about these volcano's to include their history. And so it was while I was learning about Mt. Pinatubo I clicked on the link about Krakatoa. It was there I saw the words Tsar Bomba when it was talking about the force behind the Krakatoa explosion.....so curiously I clicked on THAT link which only led me further down the rabbit hole.

Once I saw that it was an Atomic bomb....I couldn't stop....had to learn more. But then the issue was whether or not Netflix had a streaming documentary about the Atomic Bomb....thankfully they did and Trinity and Beyond: The Atomic Bomb Movie more than satisfied my urge.

And poof, just like that I had managed to misplace nearly 3 hours of my life with mindless information and knowledge cramming. I had, however managed to watch a documentary about dogs and learned some neat things. Such as 80% of dogs that exist today did not exist 130 years ago. Therefore I am going to beat you all the punch with this and invoke Godwin's law, by simply stating fact....if you own a dog, you support Eugenics and thus you are no better than Hitler and the Nazi's.

Dogo Argentino-If you like this dog, you like Hitler.
(Wikipedia)

Electronically Yours...

2011-10-03T14:52:00.000-04:00

So we covered that I'm not an elitist when it comes to music. I just enjoy GOOD music. Oddly enough one of the categories of music that I didn't really sample when I did my last post on musics is Electronic based music. Ranging from Trance to House to Techno I like just about all of it (yes to include the currently popular Dubstep as well.)

So below you will find a sampling of some of the thing stuff that I like that is electronic based. A mix of new and old....

Orbital, 'Nothing Left', Middle of Nowhere

Underworld, 'Born Slippy.NUXX', Trainspotting Soundtrack

Way Out West, 'The Gift', Way Out West

Skrillex, 'Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites', Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites EP

SebastiAn, 'Ross, Ross, Ross,' Total

MSTRKRFT, 'Easy Love', The Looks

Kavinsky, 'Testarossa Autodrive,' Teddy Boy EP

For the next one you have to do a little math. One Kavinsky track + One SebastiAn remix=

Justice, 'D.A.N.C.E.', Cross

Deadmau5, 'FML', For Lack of a Better Name

Daft Punk, 'Voyager', Discovery

Boys Noize, 'Let's Buy Happiness', Oi Oi Oi

The Bloody Beetroots, '72 Virgins (remix)', Best of: Remixes

Cool Sunset

2011-10-02T21:09:00.000-04:00

And by cool I mean the temperature was under 90's for the first time in a long time. Although the actual sunset wasn't bad either.

First off the Sunset as it appeared.

Play with the colors and saturation just a little bit.

Then make it a bit dirty and add a slight retro feel to it.

Wide Angle shot with a slight blue added for effect.

Wider shot with the East/West Expressway on the left of the frame.

Same shot with a bit more Retro feel to it.

Wide shot with a closer view of the downtown skyline.

Same shot just a bit dirtier and not as crisp and clean as the last.

I never get tired of having decent sunsets to take photos of. Hope you like 'em.

Volvo of Doom...

2011-09-27T23:06:00.000-04:00

Is pretty much the title given to ANY Volvo I run across. Me+Volvo=Bad Times. Not on purpose mind you...it's just how things go. Any ways buddy at work has a Volvo 850 Wagon and it just so happens there is a photo contest for IPD for Volvo's. Overall winner gets a $300 gift certificate for the store, individual winners get $50 certificates. So I figured why not put my camera to us and potentially get Mr. Seda some gift certificates to go towards the Vovlo of Doom. Only two will be entered. So far this is what we have:

I'm not an elitist...I just have good taste...

2011-09-27T20:49:00.001-04:00

when it comes to music. Once upon a time I did, potentially, use the term elitist when it came to my taste in music. And yes, this post might be somewhat of a defense when it comes to that term that has been tossed around. I admit to using it and also admit that it was used in poor judgement. I apologize for any disrespect I might have given towards the musical choices of those around me.

However, I have seen the errors of my ways and realized I used the wrong adjective when describing what I like musically. It's simple really...I like music that doesn't suck. Plain and simple. It can potentially grace the airwaves of popular radio (they still play music on that right? MTV having VIDEO MUSIC AWARDS when they don't air music videos anymore has me wondering on that one.) and still be something that I like....of course I'll admit chances are that if it plays on a Top 100, I'm probably not as enthused to listen to it....but I'll suffer..errr learn to like it :)

Music is a very neat element of your lives. For most of us it's there in some form or another at any given point of our day. We can listen to a track and INSTANTLY be taken back to a memory that is forever associated with that tune. It can be the summer you broke up with someone (even though we really know they were the one that broke up with you.) Perhaps it's that time in your life when everything was on the up and up. Or maybe it was one of the darkest times when everything seemed to be as low as it could go.

Doesn't really matter, chances are there is a tune associated with it in your musical library. And when it comes to me....OY VEY!!! Growing up my father ~~had~~ still has one of the biggest record (for those of you under 30, records were pre-digital download, CD and cassette tape...and if you are not sure what that last one is...DIAF! (that is Die in a Fire for all of you that know what that last one is)) collections that I know to exist. As such the daily diet of music was as such....Frank Zappa, Rolling Stones, Led Zepplin, Steely Dan, Queen, Various Jazz artists and of course a DEEP collection of seasonal favorites.

Naturally growing up I had to rebel against my fathers 'dumb' taste in music. Only to latch onto my own group of musicians, that in due time would be considered dumb by others. In that would come a love of Grunge, Neu-Metal, Rap, Hip-Hop (and yes those are TWO separate categories....not one as they like to do with it these days) Classical, Electronic, Techno, Funk, Jazz, Blues, Rock, Alternative, Pop and especially Soundtracks.

So with a vast range of tastes and a large library of musics it is easy to be caught up in the quality of music that one has in their library. And this is what I did....I singled out...persecuted....I was the musical version of Torquemada (hello obscure Spanish Inquisition/Mel Brooks/Monty Python reference.....NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!!!) Roaming the land like a ronin warrior slaughtering all that were musically inferior to me.

After a bit of doing that I realized that I wasn't TRULY thinking that I possessed a better taste in music than others around me. I just like a larger variety than a GREAT many people.....I was one of the most musically diverse people that did not play an instrument.

So you see I'm not 'better' than you cause you listen to Top 100 all the time...I just eat more musical pie than you do....so I'm just fatter...musically. It's not your fault....it's all gland related. I kid....but just to show you, I' ll leave you with some samples of the wide range of music found in my library.

Radiohead, 'Pyramid Song', Amnesiac

Stevie Ray Vaughn, 'Life by the Drop', The Sky is Crying

Led Zepplin, 'The Ocean', Houses of the Holy

Just a quick side note....HOLY JESUS!!! You could transplant this performance (update the clothes PLEASE) and they would pretty much put just about EVERY rock group currently performing to complete and utter shame.)

Johnny Cash, 'Big River', Single Release

LMFAO, 'Party Rock Anthem', Sorry for Party Rocking

Flying Lotus, 'Robertaflack', Los Angeles

Bad Brains, 'Banned in D.C.', Bad Brains

Metallica, 'The Call of Ktulu', Ride the Lightning

A Tribe Called Quest, 'Award Tour', Midnight Marauders

Soulive, 'Steppin', Turn it out

I can has large sized dog?

2011-09-14T23:46:00.000-04:00

Alright it is that time yet again for another rambling from my brain. I've ranted about my feelings on memorials, I've told you a little something about myself and I've shared my hatred of musicals with you. I suppose now it's onto something that I love.....DOGS!!

Love those hairy, slobbering bastards. Dogs are pretty much the greatest animal since...EVAR! Unfortunately the world deems it necessary to divide itself into two categories...Dog people or Cat people. (I myself see it more like Dogs, Cats and people that seriously considering owning a primate, but I always get shot down on that one.)

Reasons why Dogs are a better option than Cats.

You've actually never seen this
dog happier than he is right now.
(Pix with Paws)

#1. They are so much more pitiful looking than Cats will ever hope to be.

#2. You can teach a dog to do neat tricks and what not. You teach Cats your daily habit and routine, making them adept at insurgent attacks.

#3. Dogs love you no matter what. Cats make their disdain and judgment known to you....I don't need Cats disdain and judgement, I get enough of that in real life.

#4. Dogs are good at catching bad guys. They lay landmines in the backyard for you, so IF you home is broken into it's that much easier to solve. Cats are probably gonna run out the back after the guy's been in your house looting your valuables (it's because they has no loyalties, they are a mercenary pet for hire.)

Because dogs have owners...cats have Humans.
(cheezburger.com)

#5. Although I suppose point #4 is mute if you have a dog...cause that is reason #5...Dogs are the best home defense system you can buy. No asshole is going to break into your house with a nice German Shepherd on the otherside of the door...SCIENCE FACT! Cats, again, are more likely to flee than defend the house.

*random side note. When it comes to dogs I must clarify that we are talking about dogs over the 20lb mark. Anything under 20lbs is a whoopee cushion that you have to feed and take out to the bathroom. They don't count...they are lower than cats.

If you can push your dog in a stroller,
you're doing it wrong asshole.
(Yelena_YK Flickr)

I know what you cat people are saying as you read this...."But my cat isn't like that, it is very loving and adorable and it's just the cutest thing you've ever seen..." Well, I hate to break it to you, but you are more or less the battered spouse of the animal owning world, you are too far gone to see what a terrible situation you've gotten yourself into. It's ok I don't think you are dumb for it...I just make funny comments behind your back (I kid, I kid....or do I?)

Another common counter is that "Cat people are shown to have higher IQ than Dog people..." Well you know what? Dumb people are more likely to make up things like that on the spot to make themselves feel better about being dumb. I don't care what you IQ is you're still an asshole, next point.

Finally, the point that is the most important as to why dogs are the best over Cats. LOYALTY. Dogs are mans best friend for a reason...they are damned loyal. For instance the movie 'Hachi', based on a true story about one dogs love for his owner....I'm not gonna get into it too much but let's just say you should stock up on tissues before you watch it. Come to think about it a lot of the world is filled with heart wrenching stories where the dog is the main character that tugs at your heart strings. Old Yeller, Where the Red Fern Grows, Turner and Hooch, Cujo, Homeward Bound etc. Those movies all bring out the tears when they come on BECAUSE of the pooch.

Ah almost forgot the single redeeming quality of Cats....Caturday!!

This man is over 6ft...you decide if he's doing it right.
(dogbreedinfo.com)

Stop that! That is just silly!

2011-09-13T22:30:00.000-04:00

So when we last left our hero he was in the midst of bearing his soul to you.....or at least exposing the parts that wouldn't get him arrested. In the last post I made a 'Fun Fact' list about me, some things you may have known others you might not have known, but on that list I mentioned music.

For those of you that know me, I have a pretty large music collection...183.55 GB's worth or 32,744 songs that can last for 88 days and 6 hours before anything would have to be repeated (not that anyone is counting.) I don't care who you are that is a lot of music and if you are telling yourself "that is nothing I've got...." STOP THAT! You just being a one-upper and nobody likes that (unless you are Mario or playing Contra.) Besides this is my blog so I get to be the one bragging about things here...that's just how this all works.

So, music.....I has a lot. A ridiculous amount to be certain. I also have a love of movies. I Worked at Blockbuster Video for a bit and for awhile bought just about every movie that I liked when it came available. That isn't so much of an issue anymore (thank you Netflix, if I were to build a false idol it would be in the shape of your mailing envelope.) We have, love of music+love of movies=must love musicals right?

NOT SO FAST THERE CHIEF!

I actually do not like musicals....not at all. They are weird...not natural in my opinion. I need my movies to be rooted in a little more reality....at least for the universe they take place.

No really, this man holding your flaming heart is more believable
than someone singing and dancing to impress a girl. (google search)

Man plucking another mans heart from his chest (Thank you Temple of Doom)? I mean it could happen...people have done some pretty effed up things throughout history so why would someone wanting another persons heart bad enough to shout "Kali Ma!" and take your still beating heart from your chest? And I know what you are thinking/saying "but how is THAT not strange but someone singing and dancing IS strange?"....I know this cause I'm looking in your window (j/k I'm not....right NOW!! Maybe later though....) Yes, that is believable...within that realm of reality of the movie....just like I didn't have an issue with Dr. Jones surviving a nuclear blast in a lead lined fridge....although I did find it a bit of a stretch that the door actually opened afterwards. I can distinctly remember many PSA about NEVER playing in old refrigerators because a friend of a friend had gotten locked in on and died this one time.....

Back to the point....Person dancing around and singing about their feelings.....not natural....anywhere. In movies or real life. Except for one (and this is where I make my one and only exception,) 'Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory' I freaking love that movie.

No, nothing creepy about this at all
(google search)

How can I have so much hatred for singing and dancing movies except for one? With such a love for music AND movie's is that kinda like Hitler turning out to have a Jewish cousin? (too soon for a Nazi reference....I only just met you....) Mostly because that movie freaking rocks. The songs actually make you want to sing....except for the one song he sings on the boat ride while tripping on acid....that is still is spooky to this day. I mean I write the word Oompa Loompa and you are not humming that tune in your head (and if not let me help you "Oompa Loompa, dupity doo, I've got another puzzle for you..."

It takes place in a candy factory. I mean if you take Seven Brides for Seven Brothers and transplant them to a candy factory and make them confectioners rather than lumberjacks....maybe we'll talk about it, although just for the sake of sanity lumberjacks should NEVER sing and dance....it's one or the other with them, Monty Python had that aspect right.

There isn't a lot of dancing in it...just singing, which while strange is at least slightly more like real life. I mean the last time I saw someone singing and dancing they were also a transient and half naked, but it's fine if you want to continue to think it's normal.

Pretty much if it has singing and dancing or if there are big musical numbers.....I have a hard time getting into it. West Side Story...was alright once 2Pac arrived on the seen, but then shit juts got real yo. The Sound of Music....if that is what Europe was like during that era, I can kinda see why Germany went Banana's (TWO Nazi References in one post....I might be pushing the limit here...) Doctor Dolittle...the man talked to animals, if you like that I can find you a guy that does that ALL the time and at the very least SMELLS like an animal too. Mary Poppins....it boggles my mind to think of all the child neglect and abuse taking place in that movie.

I'm just going to go ahead and blame Musical's for the decline of western society. It's just easier that way. I'll be right here listening to my music if you need me.

At least now we know why Batman's voice is so horse...
he's been singing his lungs out, maybe they aren't all bad then...
(amazon.com)

Doing this out of order

2011-09-12T21:58:00.000-04:00

So I started a blog....I guess it's the 21st, social media thing to do these days. I'm just putting myself all out there in cyberspace I suppose. I don't really do blogs very much...as a matter of fact the only one I read regularly is Megan's blog. Not really sure how often this will be updated or if it will be updated. I did know that I wanted to put some feelings out there in terms of Sept. 11th and all the hubbub surround that event.

So what will this space of interwebs turn into.....not really sure. Perhaps I'll pick up some skills at graphic design and publish them here. Or maybe I'll use it as a spot to hock photos that you might like to decorate your wall space. I could potentially use it as a means to warn the world about the impending world take over of monkey's.

More than likely I'll just use it to fill up space that I would ordinarily use Facebook to fill up with links. Maybe I'll just comment on random links that I find and add witty feedback to them and add comedic value to things that already exist.

So where does this leave us? I suppose it leaves us in a situation where I feel compelled to give some sort of background on myself (it might lend some credibility to WHY you might want to read this blog.)

My name is Drew. I am currently employed as a 9-1-1 operator for an agency in Central Florida. I recently got done with an 8 year obligation to the Florida Army National Guard as a Public Affairs Specialist (what is that you say? What does that job do? It means that I took pictures, wrote stories and got to see all the cool things the Army does for a living without being required to actually DO those jobs.)

Really took this photo and really met Joe Theisman...class act that guy.
(U.S. Army Photo by Pfc. Andrew Hillegass)

In those 8 years I spent 6 months working for a public relations mission out of the Pentagon called 'Operation Tribute to Freedom' that ran from 2003-2011. Got to do a lot of neat things during that time in D.C. and put a lot of great men and women in touch with their hometown people to share their own experiences. It is probably, to this day, one of the most satisfying things I did during my time in the Guard. I also spent a year down at Naval Station Guantanamo Bay working in the Public Affairs shop there. My time there mostly dealt with arranging and escorting members of the media that were interested in seeing the detention facility down there. That would be one of the more challenging jobs I had during my time in service. Between all that I did quite a few stints on State Active Duty for FL in 2004 mostly. I missed out on the fun that was Hurricane Katrina in 2005 while I was recovering from ankle surgery to remove a benign tumor from the bone.

I developed a love of photography as a result of my time in the military and have tried to keep on top of it since I separated from the Guard. I enjoy going out and discovering things to take photos of, I'm not a big fan of shooting people (not cause I'm not good at it, it's simply I'm no good at it. This was something that I learned when I was going through training at the Defense Information School at Ft. Meade, MD. You learn very quickly during photography week, who in the class can just capture a person with a photo and who is going to have to work at it a lot.......I would be the latter.) so I just stick with shooting random things and hoping for the best (ok, so maybe not hoping for the best, but I'm still surprised by some of the shots I WANT to get never turn out, but ones I didn't give a second thought about tend to be the ones that are awesome.)

This may or may not get said for some of the calls that we get (Google Image Search)

In between the time I joined the Army and the time that I got out I started my job as a 9-1-1 operator. I don't think there is a job in the world that is as much fun and as strange as this job. Contrary to popular belief this job is not as stressful as you might think. Not every call is a Rescue 9-1-1 call, but that's is not to say you don't get your fair share of interesting calls in a shift. But the training you go through in someways is like military training, you train like you work (or fight for the military) and you work like you train. It's that method that makes the job feasible, it all becomes a type of mental muscle memory game after awhile. The pay for the job is also nice and helps to make what stress you do get worth your time.......mostly.

Let's see what other types of facts might there be out there that make this posting a little bit more interesting.....hrmmm....ah

FACT #1 I've did actually go and see Titanic more than once when it was still in theaters.
FACT #2 I did not engage in underage drinking nor illicit drugs before I was 21.
FACT #3 I once defeated a Bengal Tiger armed with nothing more than a shoe.
FACT #4 I am possibly one of the most musically diverse people around that does NOT actually play an instrument.
FACT #5 I do a lot of bad voice impressions, but I don't do any GOOD impressions.
FACT #6 I suffer from a bad case of always being right....even when I'm not.
FACT #7 I can fake confidence with the best of them I thank Sgt. San Andreas for teaching me that valuable piece of information....even if it does lead directly into FACT #6.
FACT #8 I have never beaten any Mario, Zelda, Metroid or any NES or SNES game.
FACT #9 I am hopelessly addicted to sports video games despite my lack of athletic ability.
FACT #10 I give my friends SOO much grief for playing World of Warcraft, that if the day comes when I do break down and give into my Geekdom....I'm not sure I will be able to handle the subsequent harassment...warranted...but still.

And that is the story I have for you. I leave you with that wealth of information for you mind to wrap it's head around, best of luck :)

Meanwhile back at the ranch....

2011-09-12T20:02:00.001-04:00

So today is Sept. 12, 2011 which means that yesterday was Sept. 11, 2011. It marked the 10th anniversary since the World Trade Center buildings were brought down. Naturally Facebook and social 'media' (oh yea, it's 'media' not media. Just like it’s Infotainment and not 24 hour 'news',) exploded with copy+paste statuses and statuses that talked about where people where when they first saw or heard about the attack. There was a lot of buildup leading up to yesterday with many different memorial services taking place and many, many different angles of coverage from the bevy of news coverage on the topic.

It was in the midst of all this flood of memorials and Never Forget reminders that I realized how irritated I was with most of it At first I thought it was merely me being me....an uncaring asshole who just didn't care about other people. A cold hearted beast of a person that could empathize with someone who was still grieving 10 years later.

So I sat silent, trying my best not to be jerk to others that DID care. I just felt like as a country we raise the flag of Sept. 11th to make ourselves feel like we are still doing the right thing around the world, fighting the good fight as it were.

It wasn't until I was talking with a coworker sharing our mutual feelings about death, mourning and all things puppy dogs and rainbows when I realized something. I didn't just have 10 years of memories about one day in Sept. 2001. I had 10 years of reflection as well.

What I don't like...defacing the American Flag...
(Google Search)

We live in a world that has forever been changed because of someone’s heinous actions. But HOW has it been changed? Has it changed for the better? Are we REALLY safer and more secure than we were before the attacks? More importantly, for me is, can we TRULY be more secure and safe than we were in the past?

A lot of things have happened in the last 10 years, aside from 3,650 days or 87,600 hours passing hour by hour, day by day.

The country as a whole has moved from a 'we stand together and united' to a near rift among one another when it comes to politics. We have changed into a country where we are mere moments from complete and utter disaster along with letting the terrorists 'win'.

I am not the same person I was 10 years ago. Not only am I 10 years older now, but I've also changed a lot of my ideals BECAUSE of Sept. 11th. Only, it wasn't the attacks that changed them, it was the way we've acted as a whole SINCE the attacks that have changed me.

I was for the military action in Afghanistan and Iraq. Today, I definitely question the 'why' behind Iraq. People argue about 'oil money' or 'personal vendetta', but for me I think it was just a series of bad choices made by a large group of people that wanted to impress their higher ups. I don't think it was as cut and dry as people want to believe....because life is not cut and dry. We have plot and reason in stories BECAUSE life doesn't always have those elements. And I think it's the same here.

We enacted 'The Patriot Act' which was 'Uniting (and) Strengthening America (by) Providing Appropriate Tools Required (to) Intercept (and) Obstruct Terrorism.' Only all it has seemed to aid in the arresting those high risk drug dealers rather than people trying to blow stuff up in America. But hardly anyone really lobbied against it because to do so would be considered 'unpatriotic' and 'against America'. But it's cool; it's only YOUR civil rights being flushed.

I look back over the last 10 years and feel jaded. Not jaded from the events of that day, if anything it made me realize just how nice that we have it in the U.S. How free from random terror and violence compared to other nations where people roam the streets outfitted with automatic weapons (and I'm not talking about Iraq or Afghanistan either, looking to you Africa!)

People seem to have a hard time looking outside of their lives to see things how others see them (I know I suffer from the same problem as well.) But there is a funny thing about outside of America.... EVERYTHING from America IS America. Starbucks=America. McDonald's=America. Hollywood Movies=America. U.S. Corporations =America.

Having been in the military I've done my fair share of yearly 'Operational Security' briefings than I care to remember. And they would always tell you to try and NOT look like and obvious American (as if being in the Middle East or Southeast Asia it's easy to blend in. And being a person with close cropped hair isn't going to SCREAM military.) But the other part they would always try to impart on you, when talking about overseas and outside of America, is that YOU the individual also represented America. So if you were going out and getting trashed or acting like an ass, that is what people would think American's are like. It's the same reason that if you've been in a conversation with someone from another country, you are likely to have heard "that is how you American's think" at some point during the conversation.

For some reason before 9/11 we lived in a world that was small and only existed within the confines of our national borders. Post 9/11 we have had to realize there is a world around us. We have to care about how we are perceived in places like the Middle East. It doesn't need to be a case of trying to make everybody happy, but at the very least you have to give consideration for what we are doing.

So I suppose in the end, much like some that was directly affected by 9/11, I too have been touched by those events. It just wasn't in an instant like it was for some folks. Instead it took 10 years for me to realize all that had happened to me.

I don't have the heart to make the jokes,
so I give you this clever raccoon.
(gamepro.com)