Alfa Sugar

Unguarded Strength is Double Weakness

2012-02-15T06:32:00.000-08:00

This article was published on Wives of Faith web page.

Our local connoisseur of fabulous cheap finds, Mary Hance (also known as Ms. Cheap to all you Tennessean readers) has published a book, Love For a Lifetime: Daily Wisdom and Wit for a Happy Marriage. One of her reader favorites is how to start your marriage: After you say I Do, you move 2,000 miles away from your family and start your life together. That way you don’t have the excuse to run from your marriage when life comes at you. Both of you learn quick and early on to depend on one another, and that is the best way to start your marriage. This is a befitting description for us military wives who dive into marriage in a similar fashion. Call it “love makes you blind,” but I like to think of it as the lifelong adventure I was born to experience.

We military wives say I Do in many ways either on a whim in the county courthouse, in a local church, on the beach, or even over the Internet (yes, there was a military wedding where he was in a combat zone and she was in her hometown). Each marriage is unique as it starts off. My husband and I wanted the church and reception type of I Do so that it included our family and friends. Recently, upon watching our wedding video with our children, my husband and I reminisced about the early days of our marriage, and how eight years later, our marriage has flourished, has endured the seven year itch and has been tested with deployments, children and other matters that you least expect when you say I Do.

The tests of marriage will always occur. It’s true that you cannot run home to your parent’s house or a friend’s house to seek support especially living 2,000 miles away from your hometown. God can only provide the strength you seek in these moments of weakness. Philippians 4:13 says it best with “I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.”

Unfortunately, some tests of our marriage come in hurtful ways and at our weakest moments.

Mismanagement of your finances has placed undue pressure on your marriage.
Someone else got the promotion your husband hoped to get, and as a result, he turned to alcohol.
A female officer falsely accuses your spouse of sexual assault, and he loses rank.
Your husband is on deployment when miscarriage occurs.
Online pornography intrigues your husband.
Going out to local bars seems like innocent fun until the next morning.
Your next PCS move is unexpected and separates you both for a year.
Your anger and frustration mount as you maintain the home front, and when home, he does little to no household chores.

There are many other ways that the enemy attacks your marriage besides these bulleted points, but our weakest moments can be the turning point needed to build character the way God intended in our marriages.

Ephesians 6: 10-18 encourages us to protect ourselves against spiritual attack. When it comes to our marriage, the oneness is challenged by the long distance separation of deployments, the pressures of parenting, the care for aging parents, a demanding job, and/or the mismanagement of time invested in your marriage. No wonder military marriages are challenged. When we are our weakest is exactly when we must summon our strength, yet when we let our guard down is when the enemy makes the most of this opportunity. Unguarded strength is a double weakness.

How do you combat these spiritual attacks?

Prayer is a powerful weapon.
Attending a Wives of Faith group meeting is another wonderful way to support, encourage and reach out to one another.
Should you need to talk on a personal level, it is important to discern and find a Christian advocate to help you see God in the picture.
Believe that this character building time will produce amazing fruit of the spirit in you and your marriage.
Have faith.

The enemy works through people and things and presents timewasters to distract us. Often, the enemy starts with our minds, and a low self-esteem is indicative of poor time management (especially true if you are seeking a job/calling as referenced in Dan Miller’s 48 Days to the Work You Love). We spend a lot of time thinking and trying to change our spouse when we should change ourselves first. We forget about our role as wife, and we find frustration in our husbands who lack initiative in stepping up to their role as head of household. In Ephesians 5: 15-16, we are warned to live purposely.

Are you making the most of your time?

Where you invest your time is telling of your priorities in life. It’s comforting to know that you do have a plan. Marriage is a lifelong plan of commitment to this one special person God sent into your life. Over Valentine’s Day weekend in our Sunday School class, we went around the room and told the story of how we met. Granted, it was a good load of laughs, and you could see each couple’s spark about how they met either while in school, through mutual friends, at a social event or even online (rare but becoming more common with military marriages). One grandmother even played matchmaker to one couple who now have five children. The marriages ranged from 1 year to 16 years. Each marriage started off the same way – saying I Do.

While I Do represents the beginning, the journey has a telling story depending on your daily decisions, purposeful living and management of self. If you make the most of opportunities through wise time management and the sword of the Spirit, there won’t be double weakness but an amazingly unbreakable bond of strength that will enhance your marriage until death do you part.

Happy Valentine's Day

2012-02-13T11:47:00.000-08:00

February 14th brings so many things into our life. It is a reminder of love and the power of love in your life. Love comes in many forms, and it is an intangible that makes life what it is. Love comes from parents to a child/ren. Love between a man and a woman is an unbreakable bond especially when united as one in marriage. Love for a family relative is insurmountable. Love for a dear friend is a cherished treasure. Love for a pet can be a strong emotion for many. Interestingly, there is a love for things that can lead to a negative influence in one's life. Afterall, things do not love back yet people and/or living things can!

Perhaps the history behind Valentine's Day is a good reminder during these cold, winter times when you are cooped up inside and the confines can wear on everyone's nerves is that you love and appreciate those in your life today.

Money can buy flowers, chocolate, fancy cards, fine dining, jewelry and anything else that expresses our love. Of course, it is wise to remain in your budget and enjoy the gift (albeit given or received). ProFlowers offers 25% off on FTD flowers for USAA members. You can log on to www.usaa.com/flowers or call USAA 800-769-7673 with your member number handy so that you can get the offer code. It's about $37-$50 minimum for this option. If you go to AAFES, there are some nice Valentine's Day discounted items. Many retailers are offering sales prior to February 14th so it's a good time to take advantage of those deals.

For the woman, it is wise to do something romantic on Valentine's Day. When in doubt about a purchase or what to do, it is prudent to spend the extra dimes and nickels because you just never know what a difference that will make in your best friend's life.

For the man, it is wise to do some form of recognition on Valentine's Day. Ladies, do dress up, put on makeup, do your hair and nails and have something special planned for you and your man. It doesn't have to be big but do it with a big heart. After all these military men give a lot for their country.

Survivor Spouse

2012-02-13T11:24:00.000-08:00

This article was posted on Wives of Faith web page.

United Warrior Survivor Foundation (UWSF) Provides
Surviving Spouses With Support & More

By Stephanie Arredondo, Board Treasurer

As we as a nation celebrate Memorial Day weekend, I am reminded of those silently celebrating our heroes. There are our fellow sisters in Christ whose best friend has made the ultimate sacrifice. We Wives of Faith know that this is part of the deal when our husbands committed to the military. It is our duty to stand by his side and to love, support and encourage him as he does his job.

Yet who is there when he comes home the way we least expect? United Warrior Survivor Foundation (UWSF) is the only non-profit organization dedicated to serving the needs of surviving spouses of Navy, Army, Air Force and Marine Corps Special Operations killed in the line of duty since September 11, 2001. What makes this group unique is that they invite surviving spouses and their children to their 4-day conferences and pay for all the expenses. The goal is to provide peer to peer mentorship, survivor transition assistance and bereavement counseling. USWF always includes surviving families in daily prayer. It is a wonderful opportunity for surviving spouses and their families to adjust to a new chapter in their lives and get the support that they need.
If your spouse was not in Special Operations yet you are a surviving spouse, then there are other means of support through Military. Com, chaplains and others.

While I cannot imagine this new chapter in your life, I do know that God will give you the strength that you need. If you think “Oh You Don’t Know What I Go Through,” I do. Back in college, my college sweetheart was in a boating accident and did not make it. Granted, we were not married, but it was in the works. Losing him changed my whole world. I grieved and cried. I got angry because life did not seem fair. I could not believe that God could let this happen, and I was mad at God for a long time. Psalm 23 helped me some, but it was reading Acts 2:25-28, Romans 5:3-5, I Corinthians 13 , and Colossians 3:8-11 that time allowed me to heal. Prayer allowed me to seek God, forgive Him and renew a relationship with Him. Journaling eased my pain of anger and depression, and I always had to write it in a letter style of Dear God, Today… and sign it Love, Me. It took a long time for the pain to subside. Time has a way of healing. I eventually got back into life. Some things worked out. Some things did not and that pain was tough at first. Then, I dated and met my best friend for life, my current husband. I never dreamed that I could find love again. I had to let go in order to be whole and move on with my life as new chapters emerged whether I wanted to or not. God was there the whole way. If I went down a road that was not good, God was there to guide me.

Today is a new day, and I am grateful for the Present. God gives you strength in ways you least expect if only you will seek Him. If you seek prayer, support or encouragement for this dark period in your life, please contact me or other military spouses so that we may pray for you and your family as you walk this new chapter in your life. I pray that you will seek the support of your military chaplain and others. You are not alone. While we never want to see a military spouse welcome her husband home this way, we are bonded in a way that few understand.

Stephanie Arredondo is Board Treasurer for Wives of Faith and writes a blog – Alfa Sugar – that lends financial perspective in modern America from one military spouse.

Fraud Alert called PHISHING

2012-02-07T11:02:00.000-08:00

Article below published on Wives of Faith web site page

The latest phishing e-mails are coming from Anderson at almedicgroup.com. Please see interesting link regarding a false Amazon.com claim.

Phishing occurs – so how do we deal with it?

By Stephanie Arredondo, Board Treasurer

Imagine an insurance agent’s phone call to you pertaining to an online insurance inquiry that you nor your spouse never made. It’s happening more and more with the ease of access to basic information. This is the beginning stage of identity theft and is called phishing.

If you read in Ephesians 6:10-18 about The Armor of God, it’s impossible to not realize the spiritual warfare we endure when it comes to marriage and money.

The enemy loves to work through things and people. In our modern era of being a military wife, we deal with handling the household finances especially when our spouse deploys. We work on budgets. We shop for groceries and clothes. We save for our retirement. We aspire to send our children to college. We pay for our basic needs all while our husband is serving our country. Then, a phone call changes your world with the realization that your identity or your spouse’s identity has been stolen. You are lost about what to do. In the mail is a past due notice bill for an account that you and your spouse never opened. This can open up a whole new experience for the service member.
Identity theft is much more prevalent than in years past. Phishing is easily done with minimal information.

For military members, the Federal Trade Commission has dedicated a section of its web site page to protect active duty service members, their spouses and family: http://www.ftc.gov/bcp/edu/pubs/consumer/idtheft/idt02.shtm
Military One Source offers extensive financial material online, but it is best to call them for an appointment with a financial counselor at 1-800-342-9647. http://www.militaryonesource.com/MOS/FindInformation/Category/MilitaryOneSourceFinancialServices.aspx
Here you will find valuable information about how to proceed.

Below are some pointers for military marriages to consider when it comes to your and your spouse’s finances.

Do check both of your credit reports. This is easily done through the three credit reporting agencies (and yes, I would check all three as it is free). If there are any false statements on your report, you and/or your spouse must address these immediately by submitting it in writing and sending it certified/return receipt. File an identity theft report with the Federal Trade Commission as well as with other relevant authorities.
Pray about this situation so that you and your spouse may overcome its trials. For some, identity theft can hinder your future financial plans in ways you never anticipated. For some whose stolen identity is so severe, it’s taken five years, $15,000+ in legal fees and no resolution to this warfare. It is during this financial time of hardship that the power of prayer is one of the last weapons of armor that can aid you both in your resolution of this situation.
To protect your spouse and yourself, it is wise to not disclose anyone’s social security card, military id, nor any financial accounts or credit card information unless it is to a known and reputable source.
All passwords and personal information should be protected.
Do not answer any online solicitations via e-mail nor provide personal information to these pop-up ads.
All mail should be collected the day it is delivered or have your mail stopped by filling out a yellow form at the US Postal service.
There is a way to post an active duty alert on your spouse’s credit report, and it is good for up to one year. This is important to do when your spouse is on deployment. The credit card companies like USAA do monitor unusual activity for your credit card, so if you travel to another part of the country or internationally, it is important to check with them about your foreseen financial spending with that credit card.
Shred all unwanted credit card solicitations or anything with your names so that this will prevent dumpster diving.
Finally, when you are out in public, please watch your wallet, passport, and other identification so that it is not stolen the old-fashioned way.

As in Proverbs 31:27, “She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness” gives us a call to take up our armor and allow God to flow through us so that we may defend ourselves from financial challenges such as phishing that all marriages want to avoid.

Organizing for Tax Season

2012-02-02T07:26:00.000-08:00

Tax season is upon us, and for those of us in the financial field, it's a busy time of gathering paperwork, finalizing some numbers and awaiting the distribution of certain forms necessary to complete certain returns.

There is no easy way to complete the workload so below are a few pointers to help the average individual to complete their taxes. For military personnel, it is wise to complete your tax return earlier than April 15th just because of international mail. Filing your return online is becoming the recommended way to expedite your tax return being processed.

Gather all financial statements for tax year 2011 including bank statements, brokerage statements, 401k, IRA, Mortgage, business expenses & receipts, and all other relevant financial data.
J.K. Lasser's How to Prepare Your Tax Return is a great reference source if you plan to DO IT YOURSELF. Tax laws change, and what was true one year changes the next. Having this wonderful resource is a wise investment. Also, it is wise to invest time into reading it (as much as folks dislike reading up on the topic) because you may determine a claim on your taxes that you had not learned about previously.
HRBlock offers tax classes and some are free or at a reduced rate for military and their spouses. If you would rather get more comfortable in a group or class setting, this may be a great option.
Tools for tax preparation include a table, chair, lamp, calculator, pencil with an eraser, your files (preferably in a accordian or box or whatever filing system you utilize), your computer, a drink of water and a clock. It is wise to setup a card table or a room solely dedicated to tax preparation work....that way if life happens and you have to walk away, you can return and start right back up with work rather than waste time setting it all back up again. (I don't think that people realize what timewasters they allow in their life so I will comment on this next).
TIMEWASTERS - yes, folks are all guilty of wasting their time especially when it comes to tax preparation work. The phone rang. The children needed me. The dog had to be walked. I have to be at church 3 to 7 hours a week. The weather impacted me. I was tired. I don't want to do this. No wonder no one likes to do this job because they allow everything else to get in the way of the priority. Focus on achieving this goal and a sense of relief will fulfill you more so.....if it's any consoldation, being a good steward of your finances and home life is an investment of time that I am quite certain any true Christian church will appreciate and reinterate.
Step one is gathering all paperwork and sorting it all.
Step two is sorting the financial information into the various categories.
Step three is completing the application...this can be done online and saved.
Step four is to review and double-check your calculations as well as your 2011 tax year information.
Step five is to send it certified mail to the IRS and/or e-file it making double sure that you get a printed confirmation.
For those who must use an accountant or CPA, it is recommended that you copy certain documents that you must retain for your records. Some CPAs lose material and you will not get it back.
Even if you have a CPA complete your tax return, you must review it, sign it and deal with it.
Paying the CPA their fee is a wise investment so a timely payment is recommended.
When corresponding with a CPA, it is wise to be ready with your questions, do not take up much of their time and realize that they are pulling LONG hours up until April 15th. Emailing is easier on everyone, and you may get a reply back at 4 a.m.
Once your return is completed and sent, it is wise to file the returns in a fire-proof filing cabinet as well as retain an electronic copy.
Keeping your documents for up to seven years is recommended. I know of some folks who keep their returns longer than that and some who don't. Again, it depends upon your gameplan and business as to what you need to keep.
When talking with people at the IRS, it is wise to listen and listen carefully. I have talked with disgruntled, powerplaying people who will not talk or reason with you. I have talked with very kind people who are willing to be of help. It's wise to keep calling back and reach one of the nice ones and discard the bad ones. Always be kind and courteous on the phone as this is a professional setting. The government red tape is present and it is overwhelming to many so it is best to be ready with your form question (and yes, they are that precise).
Keep in mind that all US citizens with earned income must file a tax return.
Due diligence is key to getting it all done.

While many dislike doing the work, it is good character building. Organizing for tax preparation is not easy especially for those businesspeople who have a lot of paperwork to review. If anything, it is a great time to review what went right and what went wrong in your financial life. It is an opportunity to revise your financial plan so that next year's tax season you can see what improvements or setback you've made.

Tune Out Financial Stress and Tune into God

2012-02-01T12:08:00.000-08:00

This article is available on Wives of Faith web site page.

Psalm 50:15 “Call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you will honor me.”

Given the recent hype in the news about a government shutdown, it’s lending to financial stress upon military families, especially for those with deployed loved ones. Politicians are making news with their ideas and comments. The Department of Defense is cautious. Critics of the federal government and the military are surfacing with more harsh words. Cutbacks in the military could occur at a time that the U.S. economy is in the early stage of a recovery. Consumer sentiment is cautious as oil and food prices rise based on inflationary influences. Perhaps the home situation is challenged with loved ones searching for employment. Stress is high for many these days, and yet is it a reminder to tune out this static and tune in to the One who delivers us without fail?

God has a unique way of capturing our attention. While the politicians and others determine what’s to occur with government issues that are beyond our control, it is important for military families, especially military wives, to pray and focus on what God needs us to focus on.

Mahlon Hetrick of Christian Financial Counseling wrote the book, Family Money Management God’s Way, and he addresses how most people do not know how to find abundance in their budgets and are not listening to what God has to say. (Hetrick, 19) Perhaps the politicians would benefit from this wisdom as well, but the fact remains that if you are not tuning in to God, then you are neglecting an opportunity to honor Him.

For short term military money matters, it is good to consider the following:

Pray and pray incessantly for our country and its financial challenge (Our National Debt isn’t sustainable, and we need for all to address it and address it soon.) Proverbs 3:5-6
Review your finances for the next month and develop a new spending plan (If this is a challenge or you need more advice, please see article.) I Corinthians 14:40
Cut unnecessary costs such as having your nails done, eating out, going to the movies, going to Starbucks, buying that pair of shoes, etc.. and get creative with certain cost-cutting measures Proverbs 16:3
If in debt and if you are making monthly payments that you believe you cannot make, it is wise to contact the business now, state your situation and ask if there’s another payment option. Many will cooperate if you initiate the phone call. For example, my husband and I worked out a payment plan for a medical bill from our son’s surgery (and no added interest expense). Psalm 1:1
For those whose financial situation is overwhelming and especially if you have a deployed military member, it is wise to seek your church home, pastor or military chaplain. By discussing your situation, certain churches will determine ways to provide love and support so as to ease the financial strain. Proverbs 15:22

For long term military money matters, it is good to consider the following:

Develop a game plan for the future because even if the government shutdown occurred, you have a personal financial management issue that you need to address. Matthew 25:14-30
Save up an emergency fund of at least three months of living expenses

Psalm 50:15

Pay down debt and remain debt-free. One good way to address this is to list all of your debts (small and large) and determine a game plan to pay them off. Romans 13:8
Review your current career and determine a five year plan. Do you need to add in more income? Do you need to cut back on certain costs? Can you do without it? These are the tough questions, and I will be the first to admit that my husband and I struggle with the wants and needs….it’s good character-building for your marriage. Proverbs 21:20
Keep God in the picture and pray with your spouse about how you can honor Him. I Corinthians 4:2

If you and your husband need a moral boost, it is wise to post Bible quotes or slogans to help you during this financially stressful era in our country’s history. Just Do It! Adjust your attitude from Can’t live without it to I can get along without it!

While there is no easy solution today, there is the One who without fail will be there and will provide the calm. He will deliver us from this financial challenge. He wants us to be blessed if only we will seek Him, live within our means and adjust our attitude through our finances. We must honor Him to all Glory and Honor, Amen!

Stephanie Arredondo is Board Treasurer for Wives of Faith, has years of experience and knowledge in the industry and writes a blog - Alfa Sugar – that lends financial perspective in modern America from one military spouse.

Disclaimer: This article is the opinion of the person writing it, and any financial decision made as a result does not make the writer or Wives of Faith liable for any action taken. Please consult your personal financial advisor for more information.

Nashville Group of Wives of Faith

2012-02-01T12:04:00.000-08:00

Nashville

For those military wives seeking a local group, this is a great opportunity to meet the new chapter leader and get linked in with other women. Wives of Faith groups are evolving but this one is rich with history and perseverance in the Nashville TN area. Open to all military spouses either active duty, Guard, Reserve or even retired.

Respect for our Military and their Families

2012-01-31T13:43:00.000-08:00

Today while meeting another military wife for coffee, we were discussing our husbands, their service during deployments and all the challenges that a military wife endures. A gentleman sitting next to us couldn't help but overhear our conversation. Originally from Mississippi, he kindly thanked us for all we are doing in dealing with our husbands and our families. He commented how 1 in 6 people serve in the military from the state of Mississippi.....not many in Manhattan nor New York can make that same claim. The irony is how in touch certain folks are from what's considered a poor state and how out of touch many are from a wealthy state.

I appreciated this gentleman's insight. So often, many endure hardships from family members serving in the military. Whether you are from the country or the city, it's wise to respect those willing to sacrifice for your freedom.

For my international readers, it's important to understand that even though we as a nation are divided, we have citizens willing to serve in our armed forces and do what is needed through hard work and toil.

Nagging is NOT Profitable

2012-01-29T21:24:00.000-08:00

Is nagging a marriage killer????

According to the Wall Street Journal's article on Nagging in Marriage is More Common than Adultery, I find it interesting how nagging is just as toxic for the relationship as is alcohol, adultery, drugs or (not even mentioned but should be) computer addiction. Yet, nagging has been going on for many years.

Let's define nagging as the grounds where one person in the relationship seeks something from the other but the other person ignores that request thus prompting another request then ignore....the circle continues until something has to give.

Yet a marraige killer, I am not certain how farfetched this idea is. Nagging certainly is no fun for either person. It is a clear sign of a communication breakdown between two people. The possible solutions to solving the problem will vary according to what's being ignored and what the request is all about. For two people who love each other and have made a commitment, it is an ongoing challenge because over time, there is a certain level of comfort knowing that you don't have to do much because your spouse will still love you and be around.

Liken this to couch potatoes who have developed large guts, it's time to change tactics. Nagging is a problem to the marital relationship. What I am saying is that even though you ask your spouse to take the trash out and they continue to say In a Minute while watching tv, you know that if you make the request again, it is STILL not going to happen and you've increased the perception of nagging. Getting someone to do what you desire especially when you've become their warm, fuzzy comfortable bedroom slippers means a definite change in tactics. Now this is not easy for those of us whose husbands go away on deployments for long periods of time.

NAME THE PROBLEM is one way to start the process of addressing this negative behavior issue surfacing in your relationship. By naming it, you redirect the focus from the other person in the relationship to the issue. No one is being blamed.

TALK THROUGH THE REQUEST is recommended. Even though one person does not see why this request must be done immediately, it is wise to have empathy and find out why. Perhaps your spouse had a horrible day at the office and doesn't want to burden you with it all and just needs a moment to regroup before engaging in home life. Perhaps your stay at home spouse dealt with a screaming child all day and just needed to feel a little bit of love in the form of taking out the trash. Perhaps you both endured hardship with a child neglecting their studies for other activities and just need to realize it's not your parenting style but a different problem at stake. Whatever the situation, it is wise to step back, name the problem (not the sympton) and understand more of the big picture.

LISTEN MORE & TALK LESS is a wise approach when resolving conflict. It's good to hear the other side talk. So often, it's easy to talk and dominate the conversation to get our point across. This isn't a win win approach. Perhaps allowing yourself to listen to the words being presented will clarify what the matter is truly about. You both may be upset about an unpaid bill (i.e. the sympton) but the real problem is about NOT doing a household chore or you hurt my feelings on the phone earlier today or lack of sexual interest.

Marriage seasons like wine over time, and as the years add up, there will be more and more issues to surface for the different seasons of life you both live. Nagging is easy and quick to make known a hurt. Yet it's not profitable to your marriage and over time, the negative effects of nagging do add up to a negative balance....ultimately you may divorce because of no resolution and irreconcilable differences.

For military marriages, nagging can hinder growth in many ways. For example, when your spouse returns from a combat zone, it's easy to nag him to do household chores and other things. Even though it takes time to reintegrate from a deployment, many military have just experienced a life-changing experience that few can understand. To reintegrate back into society it takes time. Nagging is more harmful because two people are overcoming separation and reuniting to start a new lifestyle. It just adds to the pressure rather than lift both partners up. If you add children to the equation, it adds another level of challenge.

The financial perspective here about nagging is to watch yourself and don't do it because the negative effects are more costly than what's been realized to date. Even if you do nag (which we are all guilty of at some point in time), it's good to revert back to being kind, saving face and taking the higher road. More important, your request of the other person matters because you matter. If possible, reassess your request and reask it rather than nag. It is amazing what is accomplished when you change yourself and your approach.

Written by Stephanie Arredondo
(c) 2012

Post-Holiday Finances for the Christian Marriage

2012-01-29T20:36:00.000-08:00

This article was published on Wives of Faith web page and was written by Stephanie Arredondo.

“Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the best part of everything your land produces” Proverbs 3:9

With the holidays past us and a new year upon us, it is crunch time again for our household finances. Savvy marketers know how the consumer behaves during the holiday season. As a result of these tempting sales such as buy two and get one free to save $5 when really you are spending $10 more than originally intended, these sellers convinced you to part ways with your dollars for this must-have product/service. Past activity at the mall and/or AAFES is now appearing on the credit card bills. Those little unforeseen extras from the holidays such as travel expenses or last minute gifts are a part of mounting expenses. Just when you feel like you can slow up and ease into the New Year full of promise, New Year resolutions and a clean slate for 2011, it’s a realization that past spending behavior is directing you differently than desired. There are bills to pay, and the total amount is higher than you anticipated. Panic can set in, and financial pressure is trying for a marriage especially for military marriages that endure enough stress as it is. Is this how our Lord wants us to honor Him as a result of this holiday season?

Have you and your spouse honored God with your wealth and with the best part of everything you produce? This question offers a rhetorical reply of yes! Yet, the credit card bill can bring reality to your homefront. In fact, more than 55% of divorced couples cited money problems as the primary reason that they had marital problems (Citibank survey). Mismanaging your finances reflects directly on your marriage and ultimately your relationship with God. What is yours, mine and ours represents this family unit. Even if the head of household is in a combat zone, we wives are to manage well our household affairs and wealth.

Most women defer money matters to their spouse. Most wives do the bulk of household buying. With more women working in the workforce and earning income, there is more emphasis on the part of marketers to target women because of the increase in buying power. As time constraints hinder couples from having effective budget meetings to see what’s going on with the household finances, women can be intimidated by the topic. Sometimes the wife feels lost as to how to manage the household. Fear can set in along with anxiety.

This sentiment is not what God intended for us and our marriage. Fear is the opposite of what God desires for us. Our finances may cause anxiety, and this is the critical time when we are to seek God.
During one deployment, my husband was overseas for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s. I managed our household finances and would correspond with him via e-mail about them. He wanted to be involved and yet did not want to worry about the details. These e-mails ended up stressing him out because we were discussing our household finances, and he had to keep his head in the game. So, I stopped these e-mails and instead worked hard to make him proud. I paid the bills. I watched the spending. I tithed. I saved. I did the grocery shopping. I worked the budget. I gave my best when it came to managing our finances.

Prior to his departure, we developed our financial game plan so that I would confidently manage the day to day knowing what our goals were. Eventually, we learned how to coordinate our efforts. This took a lot of pressure off of him while humbling him to depend on me. I felt engaged and more of an active participant in the deployment process. It made me get closer to him and strengthened our marriage even though we were miles apart. We would pray about our finances in addition to other prayers. As a result of our efforts and upon his return home, we agreed to celebrate by making a donation to The Salvation Army. It felt so good to give our best.

What is the best part of everything you produce? Take it and honor God with it.

Regardless of your financial situation, today is a good time to talk and pray with your spouse about your finances. Even if there’s credit card debt or other financial hardship, I can promise you that if you both give your best and honor God with your wealth, you will see a direct benefit to your marriage that you’ve never experienced before. It is an amazing blessing to you and your marriage.

* * * * * * *

Should you need more financial resources, there are many that I have listed below. While this is not an endorsement of their products and services, I offer these resources as a way for you and your spouse to consider options that best fit your needs. In my opinion, there are limited financial resources available to the Christian military marriage/family.

The one that I believe is best for many is the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University link Introduction to Dave Ramsey Military Edition as well as the Dave Ramsey Military Resource Center for Military Families that is offered through various bases or FRG programs.
Military OneSource Financial Services offers financial consultation via phone.
DoD Article on How To Confront Financial Issues Early is a good read for both the military member and spouse to understand why it is important to manage your finances soundly.
USAA is another pro-military financial resource company to consider as they are not just an insurance company but also offer banking, financial counseling and other financial services.
Military Money offers an interesting online resource of information for military families.
A few books to consider are Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey, Money and Marriage God’s Way by Howard Dayton, Family Money Management God’s Way by Mahlon Hetrick, The Household Money Organizer, and A Woman’s Guide to Family Finances by Ellie Kay.
Your local library or bookstore offers simple financial educational resources.
The best resource for further financial understanding is you educating yourself. That means spending your time calling, asking questions, doing calculations, and even attending classes or information sessions.

Best Wishes to you and your spouse as you both embark on a journey well worth it to your marriage and ultimately to honor God. Please post below any resources worthy to share.

Stay at Home Moms ARE Worth It

2012-01-18T07:56:00.000-08:00

This Yahoo! Finance article affirms How Much is a Homemaker Worth. $96,261 per year according this article and yet I've reviewed other sources where stay at home moms are worth $120,000 plus. For example, the article pays a yard man $30 to mow whereas many charge between $65 to 125 so it depends upon the cost of living in certain areas of town.

RESPECT is as high as one might think for the individual being the stay at home mom. I think that respect is returning to this less than prestigious profession. The original thought that you can have it all isn't true for everyone.

Drawbacks to being a stay at home mom are:

no paycheck
financial dependance is necessary
few sick days or vacation days are offered.

One can speculate how this is the worst job to accept based on these drawbacks, and yet it is THE MOST IMPORTANT undertaking of any job in the world. I highly respect anyone willing to give it all up and stay home to provide your husband the means to do his job so that you can create a wonderful home environment.

Let's examine the job:

Cooking - With a 70% markup at local restaurants, this is the biggest area to save money and yet it can have positive health advantages. Many women dislike cooking; however, there are many home delivery companies as well as prepared foods sold in grocery stores and commissaries to help the cooking challenged person.

Cleaning - More like picking up prior to cleaning is the essential part of this job. Your family's health mandates at least once a month cleaning. Basic cleaning is cleaning bathrooms and kitchen, sweeping and mopping floors, dusting, wiping surfaces and taking trash out.

Laundry - Gathering all the clothes, sheets, towels and other washables and then washing them in the washing machine, dryer and then folding, sorting and putting clean clothes away.

Shopping - Buying provisions for the home is a frequent activity. Considering the auto fuel involved with driving around town, it's important to take a list along with coupons to the store (sometimes several stores) in order to make purchase. This takes more time than what folks realize because of huge square footage, crowds at certain times of the day and towing kids along.

Paying Bills - Paying bills such as household, medical, insurance and other expenses is important.

Home & Yard Maintenance - It takes time to mow the yard or maintain a house, condo or townhome. Certain basic maintenance is mandatory yet there is seasonal maintenance as well as remodeling or repainting.

Child Care - This is a super important part of the job because children under age five require close supervision. Feeding, changing diapers or potty training, laundering clothes, picking up toys and other items are just a few of the job to dos. Reading to your child/ren, playing music, taking them to the park, doing a craft project, or other important activities help children to develop their minds and prepare for education.

As you can imagine, each aspect of the job when singled out is simple and easy to do. The trick is to multitask and accomplish it all every day with no days off and hopefully no sickness. The stay at home mom who can master managing it all and still look like the 1950s woman impeccably dressed with makeup on is unique (there are some that exist but they are in the minority!).

Military Stay At Home Moms really are challenged with fulfilling all job requirements while the serviceman is deployed for a LONG time.

This is a brief overview of some financial perspective so that when you mop that kitchen floor again and wonder why did I give up my high paying job to do scully maid work, you look at your family and realize it is all worth it in the end.

Copyrighted 2012 by Stephanie Arredondo aka Alfa Sugar

NOTE: For those moms who must work and raise children, I know that this article is limiting. The advantage you have is you can have adult conversations during the day, make connections, and have time away from the children and home. The stay at home mom is lucky to have an adult conversation, is rundown working day in and day out, and is eager to get away from the house just to get a break. I believe that each family is unique and must function as the head of household feels it must. Working two full-time jobs is never easy.

MIL & Your Mighty Marriage

2012-01-16T21:21:00.000-08:00

(Article NOT published on Wives of Faith web site page even though submission was made over 60 days ago so I am posting it here on my blog in hopes that it provides a nonmonetary financial perspective for wives and mother in laws (mil)).

MIL or mother in law jokes abound in ways we least expect. The newly wed wife said to her husband when he returned from work: "I have great news for you, Honey. Pretty soon we're going to be three in this house instead of two." The husband started glowing with happiness and kissing his wife said: "Oh darling, I'm the happiest man in the world." But then she said: "I'm glad that you feel that way because tomorrow morning my mother moves in with us."

"Have you not read," said Jesus, "that he who made them in the beginning made them male and female, and said, For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh? So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." Mark 10:9.

Jesus addressed the importance of marriage between a man and a woman. There is a third party involved with each marriage, but it’s not our MIL or somebody else. It’s Christ himself. Military marriages benefit from a distance factor when forming their family unit. PCSing to different bases around the world forces the husband and wife to depend on one another as well as Christ. Though lonely at times, this opportunity directly supports scripture and helps couples to submit to one another.

A third of many marriages dissolve because of interference by parents or other family members unconsciously. This is a staggering statistic that puzzles many; however, over 80% of the in-law complaint letters that Ann Landers receives deal with mother in law problems, specifically the husband’s mother. Call it a clash of cultures or power plays but the fact remains that it is a challenge for many marital relationships to form their family unit.

The in law relationship can be a great blessing or a toxic relationship depending upon the two women. Obviously, both have in common one thing – they love the man who is son to one and husband to the other. Two is company and three’s a crowd can definitely challenge things. What’s remarkable is when both enjoy the in law relationship as did Ruth and Naomi. While not all mother in law relationships evolve this way, according to Terri Aptner’s What Do You Want From Me? , the issue at hand for MILs is vulnerability and the threat that this mother/son relationship is changing.

Change is inevitable, and seeing your son off on a deployment is difficult for MILs. Marriage can provide a blessing or another threat to the MIL. PTSD is on the rise with husbands returning from the combat zone, and many MILs and/or family members feel the need to step in and do something, especially when it is a young marriage. This is when tempers flare, words are spoken and unintentional pain is inflicted upon many.

When a baby is born, it can be tricky because MILs want certain family traditions passed on. Sometimes, the new mom experiences doubt and confusion as she gets critiqued by her mother in law. The MIL sees an inexperienced mother making many mistakes and feels she needs to step in for the sake of her grandchild. The husband may be deployed or on TDY orders thus adding concern and stress because he is not present. Around the holidays is when stress levels increase.

Do you have a MIL situation? Is your marriage challenged as a result of a MIL or another family member? What to do? How do you maintain some form of sanity?

First, it is important to be in prayer about your circumstances. You and your marriage matter. Communicate with your husband, mother in law and other family relationships that your marriage is between you and your husband (not anyone else) and that you and your spouse will make your family unit’s decisions, albeit finances, estate planning, parenting etc.

Next, it’s important to set certain priorities to where your spouse is at the top of the list. Badmouthing your mother in law is not on the list. Focusing on your husband and what is needed for your marriage is THE priority in addition to prayer.

Finally, having an exchange of mutual respect with your mother in law is recommended. You want what is best for the same person as well as for the children.

Forgiveness is important especially when feelings have been hurt, and while no situation starts off great, perhaps with time, you and your MIL will improve your relationship in such a way that it will blossom and benefit so many around you. Perhaps it’s hard to smile at a person who has deeply hurt you. While no relationship is ideal and setting aside the MIL jokes, the important point is to have faith that God is with you and your spouse as you walk this wonderful journey of marriage.

by Stephanie Arredondo

Time is THE currency of your world

2012-01-16T20:53:00.000-08:00

Checking out at a local grocery store, I overheard a school teacher comment about how nice it was to shop in a small square footage place where none of her students nor their parents were there to interrupt her shopping experience. While I thought how odd it is that she doesn't want to make that connection with her students (after all she is a role model), it dawned on me how those interruptions along with all these other interruptions such as e-mail, text messages, phone calls, and such take time away from us getting done what we need to do for daily living.

Back during the era of Little Women, the joy of socializing with others much less receiving a letter was priceless. Wall Street began underneath a tree and evolved from bucket shops into this mega computer world of finance today. The classic movie It's a Wonderful Life brings a stark reality to time spent developing relationships versus time spent on the bottom line. Certain priorities are the same and/or change depending upon a person's goal in life. Today, people are in such a hurry to move on if not steer clear of someone just so that they don't have to speak is a polar opposite of the time before computer domination. Perhaps our social skills are declining, and many military wives are practically screaming for a face to face connection. Perhaps many are too busy to realize what is really going on. Perhaps many are challenged with the varying demands upon their time.

There is only 24 hours per day seven days a week. With that limited amount of time, some folks suffer sleep deprivation in order to achieve more. Sleep disorders are on the rise because of an imbalance in present day lifestyles. I usually react negatively to my children getting sick and having to cancel activities for a few days; however, I surprise myself with how positively happy I am to slow up and enjoy living life. There is something to stopping and smelling the roses.

Time management especially of self is super-critical of anyone at any stage in life. It is not how much you accomplish in one day or pack as much as you can in one suitcase for the day. Rather, it is focusing your time on the top priorities in your life for that day.

Investing your time into something remarkable such as your marriage, your children, your education, your ability to be a better worker amongst peers or whatever you name is well worth it in the long haul. Some folks take pay cuts to work less hours or even get more vacation time so that they can enjoy the life that God created for them.

Time is the currency of your world. The key point to determine is how you self-manage yourself and your time to achieve your goal(s). Though time is precious, time is fleeting away at record breaking speed. It is important to make the most of it. As us finance gurus love to analyze the time value of money equation, it's even more important to consider the nonmonetary forms of success that lend to creating a life worth it in the long run.

Veterans Crisis Line

2012-01-16T20:26:00.000-08:00

1-800-273-8255
Veterans Crisis Line web site page
TXTed to 838255
24 hour 7 day a week

This is a wonderful opportunity to reach a veteran.

HONOR OUR VETS!

2012-01-11T12:35:00.000-08:00

Fundraiser for Our Veterans Music City Style!
Rock Benefit Show @ The Hard Rock Café Nashville TN
Sunday, January 15, 2012
8pm Midnight

All Ages Welcome (under 18 require parent/guardian)
Benefit Rock Show to Support Returning Troops and Their Families

8:00 pm – Marlee Scott (country/pop)

8:40 pm – Sharif Iman (pop/rock)

9:20 pm – Magician/Illusionist Carl Michael

9:45 pm – Shawn Mayer (indie rock)

10:30 pm – Kris Bell / Dav Mikals / Matt “Lig” Knabe (ROCK!!)

$5 cover
FREE Passes for Military veterans with proper ID courtesy of HonorVet.org

Reserved Tables for 5 people available $

100

Proceeds to benefit HonorVet.org

4Q2011 Results for Alfa Sugar

2012-01-08T13:21:00.000-08:00

During Alfa Sugar's inception year as a blog, it has seen 2,327 all-time views from an international audience (such as USA, Sweden, Russia, United Kingdom, Germany, Canada, India, Romania, Singapore, Latvia and many others). Positive feedback has been strong regarding the content of this blog as I believe that it discusses financial perspective in such a way that many seek without realizing the need. For veterans, many have been able to gain some current information regarding their situation; though limiting, it is a key resource to filter through the red tape online.

Top three articles of interest for the quarter and year are:
1) No Pay if Fed Shutdown Occurs
2) Concurrent retirement and disability pay for our veterans
3) Veterans, the public is outraged at your cost of coming home

Many of our articles get posted according to the financial perspective that seems relevant at time of publication. Our top article categories include military money, financial food for thought, personal spending, retirement and big picture (economy).

Alfa Sugar represents a former financial advisor who is completely independant of any and all financial insitutions. This autonomy enables her to post relevant financial perspective that is unbiased yet current marketplace perspctive based off of over 20 years of experience and knowledge. Please see disclaimer note.

Thank you for making 2011 a great year for Alfa Sugar.

2012 May Be a Financially Great Year

2012-01-08T13:08:00.000-08:00

2012 may be a financially great year, that is IF you are willing to do something about it.

It's important to keep in mind that things just don't happen. You have to take action and make things happen. So why does this bit of perspective help me out financially?

In the wonderful world of finance where everyone must do basic math on up to advanced math albeit with your income, investments or other means of support, there is action happening. Your spending behavior is directly reflected in your wallet even if it is buying food or fuel or other. By not paying attention to your budget or how you spend your money, you are taking action.

Perhaps you are neglecting your finances. It's easy to do because many folks dislike the accountability factor involved with budgeting, reconciling your accounts and making financial decisions. Sometimes financial hardship resurfaces hard times from your past and can cause you to turn the other way or can cause you to get intense when it comes to your money.

Perhaps you are a good steward of your money, track it and live within your means. This routine action of managing your finances deserves a pat on the back AND a time to reassess your financial goals. Are you interested in a return on your funds? Are you going to take a risk and step out of your circle of comfort? Are you willing to do more work for more financial gain or are you determining your retirement options?

Perhaps you are in between where you earn income and yet just can figure out why the money was there and is now gone. This constant merrygoround gets old, discouraging and lackluster. This is when taking a personal finance class or something related to the topic will help jumpstart you back into action.

Perhaps you have been in recovery. For many veterans and military personnel coming back from the combat zone, they are faced with medical costs that wipe out whatever savings and/or income that they have. The financial hardship on the families is difficult. For some the physical disabilities create challenges including finding a job, keeping a job, and dealing with certain limitations. For many, they are dealing with PTSD or post traumatic stress disorder. It's a major issue that few talk about nor the negative effects it has on many military families. Sweeping it under the carpet is difficult when a military member dealing with PTSD has a hard time getting out of bed to go to work or to even funtion in American society.

I write that 2012 may be a financially great year because it can be if you take action. One problem is the word may, and I specifically use this word to make a point. Many want to live up to doing a good job and yet they (especially the men) feel that what they do is not good enough. Bosses and/or supervisors provide negative feedback, expect more than what is realistic and pass judgement on subordinates that beats them down. Few workers underestimate their ability to do a good job yet most question their superior when it comes to job performance and evaluation. Yet employment provides a financial means to support the family so many workers just grin and bear it.

Today is the day to take action even if it is a baby step in your financial affairs. Perhaps you organize your bank accounts into a notebook and your bills into another notebook. Perhaps you learn about a new financial software via your financial institution's web site page or Internet or package. Perhaps you pick up a book from the library to read. Perhaps you cut up your credit card and start paying it off. Perhaps you open a new account to help jumpstart your financial future with just $20 a month.

Little steps of action will enhance your financial situation. Balancing your life and keeping hope abreast will help you navigate through this tricky time. Perhaps reducing or cutting back in certain areas is a necessary action to help your family go forward. For example, buying a frozen pizza versus ordering a pizza for delivery is a small step to save some outflow. Now, if you are on TDY orders and/or PCSing and don't have access to a kitchen, it is wise to eat healthy, drink lots of water instead of sodas or alcohol and make practical choices. Ask for the military discount when possible and seek restaurants who do give it so that you can cut back on this eat out expense. Also, during lonely times it is easy to spend money to compensate for not having someone around. This is when it is very important to do a low cost activity such as a craft, sign up for a class, exercise, attend a church social function or go to the local library for free events (sometimes they are posted on their bulletin boards more so than on the web).

Just taking action to do something will help you come alive with life, venture out, learn something new and gain a whole new perspective on life. It is so much better than watching tv, playing a video game or anything else via your couch. Act and see what great possibilities lie ahead.

Out with the Old and In with the New

2012-01-04T13:07:00.000-08:00

New Year's Resolutions abound in ways we least expect. Everyone has something new to do this year whether it's losing weight, doing better in an area of life, getting pregnant, finding a special love, making more money, or on and on and on.....

This year, it's a good thing to focus on out with the old and in with the new.

Instead of dwelling on past failures or past life experiences, it is important to embrace the present like none other. So often we blame ourselves for what's happened and yet we forget to forgive ourselves and try to do better by starting with the little, insignificant, detail stuff that matters in more ways than you'd expect.

For veterans and those dealing with PTSD, it is important to try something new that blesses you.

The financial perspective here is to clean up your finances, prepare taxes and get control of your financial affairs. Kind of like weeding a garden, it's good to let go of investments where the return is lackluster and redirect to a new investment instrument that better meets your needs. It's an arduous task that few enjoy; however, it is a great necessity should you desire to change your family tree.

Embrace the new and try something new in your life. This is your year, and according to Dr. Seuss' book Oh The Places You'll Go, you will succeed indeed!

Celebrate The Season One Nation Under God

2011-12-24T07:57:00.000-08:00

Americans struggle this time of year with celebrating the holidays. For some, it's a lonely time. For some, it's an exciting time. For others, it's a crazy busy time. For others, it's a time when you dread it. Whatever your struggle this time of year, it is wise to keep some perspective that money can't buy yet provides a return far greater than your investment portfolio.

Getting back in touch with your spiritual side is a nice start. I listened this morning on the CBS show where three clerics respectively representing the Islam, Jewish and Christian religions spoke about The Deeper Meaning of the Holidays All three commented on why Americans aren't as in touch with their spiritual side. For one thing, many are busy and are trying to buy things to satisfy needs. All agreed that Americans aren't as spiritual as in past times.

Relationships take time, and you need to invest in them. It's intimidating for many who must use a credit card to satisfy certain needs. You cannot buy love. Though love is unseen, not tangible and not readily available, it is experienced by many so we know it exists. Perhaps past hurts prevent you from opening yourself back up and being vulnerable to receiving and/or giving love. If that is the case, then by all means take your time but do not keep the wall up preventing the WHAT IF love really happens this time. It's a risk well worth taking.

Forgiveness is key. Impossible to forgive...I believe not....It takes courage and swallowing your pride to forgive. Though many see this as weakness, it is greater strength than any football player or Olympic champion can ever display. God forgives us, and perhaps He is desiring us to forgive Him. We can learn to forgive by forgiving others.

We are one nation under God. Isn't it neat that all can celebrate this time of year?

Holiday Season Tips

2011-12-01T15:40:00.000-08:00

Frantic about the end of the year? You are not alone. Many are. In addition to all the holiday season busyness, Americans are dealing with an economy that is dismal regarding employment. For many, Christmas will not be as great as in years past.

1. Check your end of the year financials. The old expression of getting your house in order is recommended.
2. Budget for holiday gift giving and go lean! Everyone understands that people aren't doing as much as in years past.
3. Spend less on your children and spend more time with them.
4. Travel with a purpose, meaning budget your auto fuel. Try to merge two or more trips to the store into one. Try to carpool or get a ride. Walking, riding a bike or even taking an alternative means of transportation though full of hassles can free up cash elsewhere. I know of a retired couple who sold their second car and share one vehicle.
5. Clothing goes on sale this time of year so be on the lookout for nice gift ideas or a new article of clothing for yourself.
6. Attend church especially the Christmas events. They bring out a cheerful bit of our soul. Plus they are free and some offer free child care depending upon the event.
7. Gift cards are all over the place and make for easy gifts (or do they?). If you are handing the recipient a gift, it is best to give cash. Gift cards now come with a $3.95 activitation fee in addition to the amount on the card.
8. Impulse spending occurs so quick as stores and salespeople put the push on you to spend spend spend. Be wise. Watch your wallet.
9. Technology is allowing thiefs to get ahold of your credit card. Check your free credit score as well as your credit card and debit card.
10. Shop during low volume of people times. Weekends, after work and school holidays are when traffic will be high. Plan a day off. Better yet...shop online and plan to be at home when the UPS man delivers your package.

Fisher House aids many with an upcoming project in Tennessee

2011-11-26T16:12:00.000-08:00

The Tennessee Fisher House is working hard to raise donations and is pending construction in Murfreesboro TN. The Fisher House is a nonprofit organization providing a home away from home for many military getting medical treatment. 96% of all donations directly benefit military families.

Veterans, Public is outraged at Your Cost of Coming Home from War

2011-11-26T16:02:00.000-08:00

The Tennessean published a three part series on Veterans called Coming Home by Tom Wilemon and the medical care being provided for them. Tony Gonzolez wrote another article on how Middle TN Families are struggling to pay cost with war. Wives of Faith was mentioned as a possible point of contact for help. Public outrage is high at how our veterans are being treated based on one of the articles. Mind you, less than a quarter of veterans dealt with physical issues requiring medical aid, yet the emotional trauma is high. I believe that both articles provide a glimpse into what some military families have endured as a direct result of service.

On the day after Thanksgiving when these articles were published, I received a phone call for help for a World War II veteran who lost his double-wide and is struggling pretty bad. While we are processing the situation to see how we can help him out, I am certain that there are more veterans dealing with similar struggles.

The bitter pill is giving so much to a country that doesn't take care of them especially years later...that's what is difficult for some veterans to bear. Cutting through the red tape of bureaucracy and government protocals, it's important that our veterans are helped out. The Fisher House is a great outreach for those seeking to provide financial support to our veterans. Donations are currently being raised for the Murfreesboro TN location of the TN Fisher House. The majority of veterans are good people trying to be treated fair in a system struggling with many flaws that add fuel to the bitterness feeling.

Sure these veterans didn't have to sign up, serve, and get paid for their time in the military, but they DID! I applaud our veterans for serving (and getting paid as well as being given certain perks). Honestly, the pay is low for what these folks and their families do to sacrifice for our country.

Yet here is something that money can't buy and that is fighting for our freedom.

Some folks sign up for college money. Some folks sign up because they need a job and/or work experience. Some folks do it for family tradition. Some do it because they have no where else to go. Some feel called to sign up. Some are guilted into serving aleit family member, peer pressure or perhaps a bet. Whatever the circumstance to enlist, the outcome is what it is.

We hope for the best for each service person. The best that we can say is Thank You for your service to our country.

Tennessee Fisher House is located in Murfreesboro, TN and is pending construction. There is a staff in place so telephone to see about specific means of support currently available.
tennesseefisherhouse@comcast.net
Phone: 615-916-1310

Tennessee Fisher House Foundation, Inc.
P. O. Box 774
Brentwood TN 37024-0774

Fisher House™ Foundation and the Fisher House™ program depends of public donations to continue its important work. Fisher House™ Foundation does not disclose the names of its donors to any other individuals or organizations. We do not do telephone solicitation. Fisher House™ Foundation, Inc. is a not-for-profit organization under section 501(c)(3) of the IRS code. Donations are tax deductible to the maximum extent allowed by law.

WAYS TO GIVE:

BY MAIL:

SEND YOUR DONATION TO:

Tennessee Fisher House Foundation, Inc

P. O. Box 774

Brentwood TN 37024-0774

Please make checks payable to: “Tennessee Fisher House Foundation”

PTSD & Jobs

2011-11-22T06:16:00.000-08:00

PTSD or post traumatic stress disorde is a serious issue for many military personnel. While the tv show Castle showed how police officers deal with PTSD, it is much different and yet similar.

It is a known fact that unemployment for those dealing with PTSD is higher than what many realize. Even if the person dealing with PTSD is employed, it affects everyone. Military wives must seek professional help if they feel that their spouse is not making progress.

Seeking employment especially during these challenging times is a challenge. It is best to network among friends, family and someone in the career profession. Taking a temporary job or doing odds and ends is better than nothing.

People want to help and yet people are hurting because of these dismal economic times. An interesting blog Rainmaker this retired military man provides some resources on it.

Learn a Foreign Language!

2011-11-22T06:05:00.000-08:00

As a foreign language major and having traveled internationally, I am an advocate for people to learn a language other than their own native one. The benefits are tremendous yet many Americans don't understand why.

In the USA, there has been an increase in language usage other than the English language in everyday exchanges. For example, we have seen an increase in the Hispanic/Latino culture. Many lawn maintenance crew and other blue collar workers speak Spanish.

French is a fun language, and I attribute my learning it to Julia Child's tv show. My dream was to go to France and go to cooking school. Signing up for French was a thrill...then came studying and mastering it. It was a struggle to learn the language, and unless you are immersed in it, it is no wonder Americans have a difficult time learning another language. I studied hard and persevered. Studying abroad helped sharpen my French speaking skills. It was neat to learn about the culture, the history, and the people.

As a military wife, I haven't had the opportunity to PCS internationally with my husband. He's traveled extensively and admits he wished he knew another language. For most military wives, it behooves you to learn another language. Our navy friends loved being stationed in Spain and gained an understanding of the Spanish language. Now back in the states, they are enjoying this ability to speak with the new wave of Spanish speaking people. A former boss studied Russian and served in the military. He rarely speaks it but gained an understanding of the language and culture that he enjoys to this day. One enlisted man who spoke arabic helped my husband purchase a nice gift while overseas. Being in the military is fun because you gain exposure to other languages and cultures.

Today's world is more international where you are able to interact with internationals easier through less costly means of communication. By understanding other languages, you understand other cultures and other people of this world. Who knows, perhaps one day we will all converse in similar dialogues and get along better...but until then, it's a neat time to study and learn a foreign language.

Digital Donations This Red Kettle Season

2011-11-16T12:38:00.000-08:00

For an institution founded in 1852 to start adopting digital means of accepting donations versus the traditional coins and dollars, it's going to get a great time of year for nonprofits such as The Salvation Army's Red Kettle Campaign. Great organization that does way more than you would think even in this modern era! If market research confirms that people spend more at fast food places when using a credit card, perhaps this will up donations to charity this holiday season.

Fewer shoppers carry cash on them. It is important to be protective of your credit/debit cards this holiday season.