All about body language

Privacy Policy for bodyacting.blogspot.com

2011-02-04T22:54:00.001-08:00

Privacy Policy for bodyacting.blogspot.com
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Love Language Signs

2011-02-04T22:37:00.000-08:00

Love Language Signs

If either of these girls (on the left or right) walks up to you, looks into your eyes for 10 seconds, then asks, "Could you tell me the time?"

You REALLY think she wants to know what time it is?

If you're a straight guy - and you give her the time of day and walk away, you REALLY need to learn more about BODY LANGUAGE.

Okay, now women.
This guy walks up to you slowly, keeps his eyes on you, then says, "Excuse me. Do you know where I can mail a letter around here?"

You think he's desperate to find a post office?

Think about it. He's smiling openly and approaching slowly with his head tilted. Hallooo!
Offer to show him the way - walk with him -especially if it's a few blocks away!

Think. Always be ready and aware! You never know when the perfect opportunity might be standing there in front of you. That's WHY understanding body language can REALLY pump up your love life!
Body language is the quiet, secret and most powerful language of all!
According to experts, our non-verbal language communicates about 50% of what we really mean (voice tonality contributes 38%) while words themselves contribute a mere 7%.
Our bodies send out messages constantly and often we don't recognize that we're communicating a lot more than we realize.

Our understanding and use of non-verbal cues in facial expression are familiar to us nearly from birth

By familiarizing ourselves with a few basic nonverbal signals, we can improve our ability to understand what people are really communicating and become aware of what we are broadcasting to the world with our own non-verbal cues.

A person's body posture, movements and positions more often tell us exactly what they mean (which may be the exact opposite of what they are saying). Many people are unaware of how loudly they communicate with their bodies.

This guy might as well stand up, wave his arms and scream, "I'm a lousy cheat! Please - flunk me, now!"

Our use and reading of body language is largely unconscious. We understand what a person indicates with their gestures and body positions and we send out our own messages - but we rarely stop to think about how we do it.

Often when a person is considered to have great intuition about other people, their understanding is actually due to careful observation of individuals, and conscious or unconscious understanding of non-verbal communication. These people can see interpret verbal and non-verbal language due to training or years of observation and analysis of people.

We need to recognize and give credibility to our own "intuition" and "feelings" about a person or situation.

One of the most basic instances involves our personal "space." We notice that when a stranger or someone gets too close, we feel uncomfortable. Unconsciously we know the distancing from others that is appropriate for our own culture. Every day we judge our own distance and respect the space of others by avoiding getting too close and follow our "feeling" to adjust to the correct distances from friends as opposed to acquaintances or strangers.

Territories and Zones of Body

2011-02-04T22:36:00.000-08:00

Territories and Zones of Body

Territories and Zones

Thousands of books and articles have been written about the staking out and guarding of territories by animals, birds, fish and primates, but only in recent years has it been discovered that man also has territories. When this is learned and the implications understood, not only can enormous insights into one’s own behaviour and that of others be gained but the face-to-face reactions of others can be predicted. American anthropologist Edward T. Hall was one of the pioneers in the study of man’s spatial needs and in the early 1960s he coined the word ‘proxemics’ (from ‘proximity’ or nearness). His research into this field has led to new understanding about our relationships with our fellow humans.

Every country is a territory staked out by clearly defined boundaries and sometimes protected by armed guards. Within each country are usually smaller territories in the form of states and counties. Within these are even smaller territories called cities, within which are suburbs, containing many streets that, in themselves, represent a closed territory to those who live there. The inhabitants of each territory share an intangible allegiance to it and have been known to turn to savagery and killing in order to protect it.

A territory is also an area or space that a person claims as his own, as if it were an extension of his body. Each person has his own personal territory which includes the area that exists around his possessions, such as his home which is bounded by fences, the inside of his motor vehicle, his own bedroom or personal chair and, as Dr Hall discovered, a defined air space around his body.
This chapter will deal mainly with the implications of this air space and how people react when it is invaded.

PERSONAL SPACE
Most animals have a certain air space around their bodies that they claim as their personal space. How far the space extends is mainly dependent on how crowded were the conditions in which the animal was raised. A lion raised in the remote regions of Africa may have a territorial air space with a radius of fifty kilometres or more, depending on the density of the lion population in that area, and it marks its territorial boundaries by urinating or defecating around them. On the other hand, a lion raised in captivity with other lions may have a personal space of only several metres, the direct result of crowded conditions.

Like the other animals, man has his own personal portable ‘air bubble’ that he carries around with him and its size is dependent on the density of the population in the place where he grew up. This personal zone distance is therefore culturally determined. Where some cultures, such as the Japanese, are accustomed to crowding, others prefer the ‘wide open spaces’ and like to keep their distance. However, we are mainly concerned with the territorial behaviour of people raised in Western cultures.

Zone Distances

The radius of the air bubble around suburban middle class white people living in Australia, New Zealand, England, North America and Canada is generally the same. It can be broken down into four distinct zone distances.

1. Intimate Zone (between 15 and 45 centimetres or 6 to 18 inches)
Of all the zone distances, this is by far the most important as it is this zone that a person guards as if it were his own property. Only those who are emotionally close to that person are permitted to enter it. This includes lovers, parents, spouse, children, close friends and relatives. There is a sub-zone that extends up to 15 centimetres (6 inches) from the body that can be entered only during physical contact. This is the close intimate zone.

2. Personal Zone (between 46 centimetres and 1.22 metres or 18 to 48 inches)
This is the distance that we stand from others at cocktail parties, office parties, social functions and friendly gatherings.

3. Social Zone (between 1.22 and 3.6 metres or 4 to 12 feet)
We stand at this distance from strangers, the plumber or carpenter doing repairs around our home, the postman, the local shopkeeper, the new employee at work and people whom we do not know very well.

4. Public Zone (over 3.6 metres or 12 feet)
Whenever we address a large group of people, this is the comfortable distance at which we choose to stand.

Practical Applications of Zone Distances

Our intimate zone is normally entered by another person for one of two reasons. First, the intruder is a close relative or friend, or he or she may be making sexual advances. Second, the intruder is hostile and may be about to attack. While we will tolerate strangers moving within our personal and social zones, the intrusion of a stranger into our intimate zone causes physiological changes to take place within our bodies. The heart pumps faster, adrenalin pours into the bloodstream and blood is pumped to the brain and the muscles as physical preparations for a possible fight or flight situation are made.

This means that putting your arm in a friendly way on or around someone you have just met may result in that person’s feeling negative towards you, even though he or she may smile and appear to enjoy it so as not to offend you. If you want people to feel comfortable in your company, the golden rule is ‘keep your distance’. The more intimate our relationship is with other people, the closer we are permitted to move within their zones. For example, a new employee may initially feel that the other staff members are cold towards him, but they are only keeping him at the social zone distance until they know him better. As he becomes better known to the other employees, the territorial distance between him and them decreases until eventually he is permitted to move within their personal zones and, in some cases, their intimate zones.

The distance that two people who are kissing keep their hips apart can tell you something about the relationship that exists between them. Lovers press their torsos hard against each other and move within each other’s close intimate zones. This differs from the kiss received from a stranger on New Year’s Eve or from your best friend’s spouse, both of whom keep their pelvic area at least 15 centimetres away from yours.

One of the exceptions to the distance/ intimacy rule occurs where the spatial distance is based on the person’s social standing. For example, the managing director of a company may be the weekend fishing buddy of one of his subordinates and when they go fishing each may move within the other’s personal or intimate zone. At the office, however, the managing director keeps his fishing buddy at the social distance to maintain the unwritten social strata rules.

Crowding at concerts, cinemas, in elevators, trains or buses results in unavoidable intrusion into other people’s intimate zones, and reactions to this invasion are interesting to observe. There is a list of unwritten rules that people in Western cultures follow rigidly when faced with a crowded situation such as a packed lift or public transport. These rules include:

1. You are not permitted to speak to anyone, including a person you know.

2. You must avoid eye contact with others at all times.

3. You are to maintain a ‘poker face’ - no emotion is permitted to be displayed.

4. If you have a book or newspaper, you must appear to be deeply engrossed in it.

5. The bigger the crowd, the less the body movement you are permitted to make.

6. In elevators, you are compelled to watch the floor numbers above your head.

We often hear words like ‘miserable’, ‘unhappy’ and ‘despondent’ used to describe people who travel to work in the rush hour on public transport. These labels are used because of the blank, expressionless look on the faces of the travellers, but they are mis-judgments on the part of the observer. What the observer sees, in fact, is a group of people adhering to the rules that apply to the unavoidable invasion of their intimate zones in a crowded public place.
If you doubt this, notice how you behave next time you go alone to a crowded cinema. As the usher directs you to your seat which is surrounded by a sea of unknown faces, notice how you will, like a pre-programmed robot, begin to obey the unwritten rules of behaviour in crowded public places. As you begin to compete for territorial rights to the armrest with the unknown person beside you, you will begin to realise why
those who go to a crowded cinema alone often do not take their seats until the cinema lights are extinguished and the movie actually begins. Whether we are in a crowded elevator, cinema or bus, people around us become non-persons - that is, they do not exist, as far as we are concerned and so we do not respond as if we were being attacked should someone inadvertently encroach upon our intimate territory.
An angry mob or group of protesters fighting for a mutual purpose does not react in the same way as do individuals when their territory is invaded; in fact, something quite different occurs. As the density of the crowd increases, each individual has less personal space and takes a hostile stand, which is why, as the size of the mob increases, it becomes angrier and uglier and fighting may begin to take place. This information is used by the police, who will try to break up the crowd so that each person can regain his own personal space and so become calmer.
Only in recent years have governments and town planners given any credence to the effect that high-density housing projects have in depriving individuals of their personal territory. The consequences of high-density living and overcrowding were seen in a recent study of the deer population on James Island, an island about two kilometres off the coast of Maryland in Chesapeake Bay in the United States. Many of the deer were dying in large numbers, despite the fact that at the time there was plenty of food, predators were not in evidence and infection was not present. Similar studies in earlier years with rats and rabbits revealed the same trend and further investigation showed that the deer had died as a result of overactive adrenal glands, resulting from the stress caused by the deprivation of each deer’s personal territory as the population increased. The adrenal glands play an important part in the regulation of growth, reproduction and the level of the body’s defences. Thus overpopulation caused a physiological reaction to the stress; not other factors such as starvation, infection or aggression from others.
In view of this it is easy to see why areas that have the highest density of human population also have the highest crime and violence rates.
Police interrogators use territorial invasion techniques to break down the resistance of criminals being questioned. They seat the criminal on an armless, fixed chair in an open area of the room and encroach into his intimate and close intimate zones when asking questions, remaining there until he answers. It often takes only a short while for this territorial harassment to break down the criminal’s resistance.
Management people can use this same approach to extract information from sub-ordinates who may be withholding it, but a sales person would be foolish to use this type of approach when dealing with customers.

How to Lie Successfully

2011-02-04T22:34:00.001-08:00

How to Lie Successfully ?

FAKING BODY LANGUAGE
A commonly asked question is, ‘Is it possible to fake your own body language?’

The general answer to this question is ‘no’ because of the lack of congruence that is likely to occur in the use of the main gestures, the body’s microsignals and the spoken
words. For example, open palms are associated with honesty but when the faker holds his palms out and smiles at you as he tells a lie, his microgestures give him away. His pupils may contract, one eyebrow may lift or the comer of his mouth may twitch, and these signals contradict the open palm gesture and the sincere smile. The result is that the receiver tends not to believe what he hears.
The human mind seems to possess a fail-safe mechanism that registers ‘tilt’ when it receives a series of incongruent non-verbal messages. There are, however, some cases in which body language is deliberately faked to gain certain advantages. Take, for example, the Miss World or Miss Universe contest, in which each contestant uses studiously learned body movements to give the impression of warmth and sincerity. To the extent that each contestant can convey these signals, she will score points from the judges, but even the experts can only fake body language for a short period of time and eventually the body will emit signals that are independent of conscious actions. Many politicians are experts in faking body language in order to get the voters to believe what they are saying and the politician who can successfully do this is said to have ‘charisma’.

The face is used more often than any other part of the body to cover up lies. We use smiles, nods and winks in an attempt to cover up, but unfortunately for us, our body signals tell the truth and there is a lack of congruence between our body gestures and facial signals. The study of facial signals is an art in itself. Little space is devoted to it in this book and for more information about it I recommend Face Language by Robert L. Whiteside.
In summary, it is difficult to fake body language for a long period of time but, as we shall discuss, it is good to learn and to use positive open gestures to communicate with others and to eliminate gestures that may give negative signals. This can make it more comfortable to be with people and can make you more acceptable to them.

How To Tell Lies Successfully

The difficulty with lying is that the subconscious mind acts automatically and independently of our verbal lie, so our body language gives us away. This is why people who rarely tell lies are easily caught, regardless of how convincing they may sound. The moment they begin to lie, the body sends out contradictory signals, and these give us our feeling that they are not telling the truth. During the lie, the subconscious mind sends out nervous energy that appears as a gesture that can contradict what the person said. Some people whose jobs involve lying, such as politicians, lawyers, actors and television announcers, have refined their body gestures to the point where it is difficult to ‘see’ the lie, and people fall for it, hook, line and sinker.
They refine their gestures in one of two ways. First, they practise what ‘feel’ like the right gestures when they tell the lie, but this is only successful when they have practised telling numerous lies over long periods of time. Second, they can eliminate most gestures so that they do’ not use any positive or negative gestures while lying, but this is also very difficult to do.
Try this simple test when an occasion presents itself. Tell a deliberate lie to an acquaintance and make a conscious effort to suppress all body gestures while your body is in full view of the other person. Even when your major body gestures are consciously suppressed, numerous microgestures will still be transmitted. These include facial
muscular twitching, expansion and contraction of pupils, sweating at the brow, flushing of the cheeks, increased rate of eye blinking and numerous other minute gestures that signal deceit. Research using slow motion cameras shows that these microgestures can occur within a split second and it is only people such as professional interviewers, sales people and those whom we call perceptive who can consciously see them during a conversation or negotiation. The best interviewers and sales people are those who have developed the unconscious ability to read the microgestures during face-to-face encounters.
It is obvious, then, that to be able to lie successfully, you must have your body hidden or out of sight. This is why police interrogation involves placing the suspect on a chair in the open or placing him under lights with his body in full view of the interrogators; his lies are much easier to see under those circumstances. Naturally, telling lies is easier if you are sitting behind a desk where your body is partially hidden, or while peering over a fence or behind a closed door. The best way to lie is over the telephone!

Some Basics and their origins

2011-02-04T22:33:00.000-08:00

Basic Sign & Their Origins ( Ring or OK / V Sign )

Some Basics and their origins :

V Sign , Ring or Ok Gesture

7 Ways To Spot A Liar

2011-02-04T22:29:00.000-08:00

7 Ways To Spot A Liar

7 Ways To Spot A Liar By Their Body Language
Children often will attempt to cover their mouths when they lie in an attempt to stop the naughty worlds coming out. If they do not wish to listen to a parent telling them off, they may well cover their ears to block out the noise and of course, if there is something they do not want to acknowledge seeing, they may cover their eyes.

As children get older, these hand to face gestures become quicker and more subtle, however, they still occur when they are lying, covering up or even witnessing deceit.

In a book by Desmond Morris that I read called "People Watching" and in it he cites some research in which nurses were instructed to lie to their patients. The nurses who lied showed a higher usage of hand to face gestures.

Let me get something straight here; when someone uses a hand to face gesture, it does not necessarily mean that they are lying. It does indicate that the person could be holding back information or you may want to consider looking at the grander scheme of their posture and manner rather than just the simple hand to face gesture.

Today, I want to give you 7 of the most common gestures that indicate deceit:
1. Covering the mouth: The hand covers the mouth as your brain unconsciously asks it to try to suppress that deceitful message being communicated. On occasions, this gesture may just be a few fingers over the mouth, or the fist closed, the meaning generally is the same though.

Some people attempt to misguide the covering of the mouth with a cough or even a fake yawn, it can be funny to see it happening. One of my favourite films, the Godfather, you can observe that when the actors playing gangsters are discussing criminal activities, they often use this gesture to show they are being secretive and it is very much observed in the wonderful TV series "The Sopranos", another real favourite of mine.

If this gesture is used, it shows that they might be lying. If they cover their mouth when you are speaking, it might indicate that they feel you are hiding something. At my speaking events, if I see members of my audience using this gesture, then I get worried! I may well interrupt proceedings and ask if anyone has questions so that they can voice their concern. Can’t say this has happened often though!

2. Touching the nose: Touching the nose can include several rubs of the nose or it may be a single quick one, or one that is hardly noticed.

This gesture should be read in the general scheme of things. If you are like me and you clip your nasal hair (eeewwww!) then if it is growing back you may get an itchy nose! Or they may have a cold.

There is much research to show that the nose engorges when we lie. In Chicago, scientists at the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation found that when you lie chemicals are released, causing tissue inside the nose to engorge. They also showed that blood pressure rises and the nose does actually get bigger when we lie! There is truth in the Pinocchio story!

Increased blood pressure inflates the nose and causes the nerve endings in the nose to tingle, which you have to give a brisk rub to satisfy. There you go.

3. Rubbing your eye: I mention kids covering their eyes earlier, and when an adult does not want to see something upsetting, the eye rub often happens. Rubbing the eye is often the brains way of blocking our deceit or avoiding having to look at the person that is being lied to.

Men usually rub their eyes vigorously or even look away of they tell a great big lie. Women are far less likely to rub their eyes, they instead elect to use a more subtle, smaller touch beneath the eye.

No doubt you have heard that well-used phrase "lying through their teeth." When someone is lying, often they clench their teeth, put on a fake smile and rub their eye is a collection of gestures.

4. Grabbing of the ear: Now I am not talking about something my school P.E. teacher used to do to me when he caught me getting up to mischief!!

If a sales person said to a client that "it only costs £150 for our services" if the person then grabs their own ear, looks away maybe and says "that sounds like a great deal." This may well be an attempt by the listener to "hear no evil."

Attempting to block out the words they are hearing by tugging the ear lobe or grabbing their ear. This is the grown up version of a child covering their ears as I mentioned earlier.

Grabbing the ear can often be a sign that the person has heard enough or would like to communicate themselves. It is often experienced if someone is anxious.

5. Scratching the neck: Using the index finger mainly of the dominant hand and scratches the neck. We usually scratch 5 times or so when we do so. This gesture shows doubt and is often present when someone is thinking that they do not agree with what they just heard. Watch for this gesture alongside verbal communication, it usually goes with someone attempting to get out of something or politely disagreeing.

6. Pulling at your collar: You have heard the expression "getting hot under the collar" of course.

Again, Desmond Morris pointed out that lying often causes a tingle in the delicate neck tissues which needs a rub or a scratch to satisfy it. Increased blood pressure from the deceit causes sweat to form on the neck often, especially if the person lying suspects that the other person knows!

7. Putting fingers in your mouth: This tends to happen unconsciously and is seen by many as an attempt to revert to the security of suckling the mother’s breast and this often occurs when we are pressurized. Children often suck their thumbs or carry a blanket to substitute their mothers breast, then as an adult, they tend to put their fingers to their mouth or such on cigarettes, pens, their glasses or chew gum frequently.

Fingers in the mouth tend to indicate a need for reassurance.

So there you go, see what you can detect in others when you are out there in the world. Be sure to remember that these things need to be noticed in the grander scheme of behaviour and manner, they are not black and white. If someone scratches their nose in front of you, look at the context, their other gestures and manner before you scream "liar" in their direction

How to Read a Person's Character

2011-02-04T22:27:00.000-08:00

How to Read a Person's Character in 3 Simple Steps

Are you interested in astrology and horoscopes? Many people would like to have their futures foretold so they can prepare beforehand. Yet, there is no absolute certainty in visiting a seer. All you can do is give it a try and hope for the best.

However, you may be able to read someone’s character by studying his or her face. You’ve heard of palm reading; but what about facial reading? You don’t have to dabble in black magic to get a reading of someone’s destiny. A close look at their features, expression, and gestures may be enough to provide a glimpse of their future. Here are a few things to look for.

1. Study the person’s physiogamy. This is an older form of character study dating to the early 1800’s. Basically, you examine a person’s features, or the “map” of their face, for an indication of their strengths, weaknesses, and destination.

A person with a large head may have a significant IQ, although sometimes the opposite is true, in certain cases.

A low brow may denote cunning, while a wide brow suggests sensitivity and intellect.

Wide-set eyes may reveal a person who is cautious and watchful, while close-set eyes hint at a limited thought span.

A receding chin is sometimes reflective of one who is passive or retiring.

Pursed lips often belong to fearless or aggressive individuals.

These are general traits and can be assembled in a variety of ways on innumerable faces. It is up to the individual interpreter to attach meaning to their arrangement on a specific person.

2. Examine the person’s eyes.

A subject who returns a frank stare may be curious or honest.

A brash stare suggests arrogance, on the other hand, and may even hint at someone with something to hide.

A person who cannot hold an eye-locking gaze for more than a second or two may be shy, modest, anxious, or guilty.

One who stares into space or in another direction, like out the window, could be distracted or bored.

Study the retina for hidden expressions of character. Although these are hard to put into words, you may be able to interpret the meaning when you see it.

3. Pay attention to gestures or expressions. A nervous tic could denote anxiety. A tight mouth might reveal someone’s nervousness, irritation, or lack of honesty. When someone turns his or her face from you in a half-angle, the person could be trying to hide something. Looking down or away also may suggest shyness or a lack of openness.

You will need to put all the clues together in a person’s face to make sense of the pattern that seems to be emerging. From it you can tell something of an individual’s character and the direction that his or her life is taking. Give it a try with someone you know to see how accurate your assessment is, and then try it, without saying anything, on someone you are getting to know, and watch to see how things turn out.

Instant Personality Analysis

2011-02-04T22:25:00.001-08:00

Instant Personality Analysis through Scientific Research

When deciding who the person is that you want to spend the rest of your life with it's important to know how each of you thinks, feels and acts. Face reading can be very helpful in knowing how to respond to your mate and how you respond. Personology, otherwise known as Scientific Face Reading can give you insights into your partner's behavior and your own. It was first researched in the 1950's by Robert Whiteside and then validated with over 1,200 people. More than 68 traits of behavior can be determined by your physical body structure. Structure / Function is the basis upon which this system is built.
Your physical structure: body size, facial width, shape, width and angle of eyes, nose, lips, etc. dictates function: how you will respond in given situations. In love, a few major traits are important to be aware of when looking for a long-term relationship:

PHYSICAL STRUCTURE

1. Emotional Sensitivity -

People with thin, soft, looser or porcelain-like skin tend to be more impressionable both emotionally and physically. They tend to be more empathetic, feeling, indecisive and low energy. They can't stand extremes in climate: too hot or too cold and are better off working indoors. Move slowly into a relationship with them since they need a lot of time to "feel you out". People with more resilient skin: thicker, firmer or tighter in texture are decisive and high energy. They are tough and able to allow other's moods to bounce off them. Very suitable for outdoors activities or jobs. You can expect a quicker commitment or a "one night stand" from these people. Finding someone of similar sensitivity will prevent misunderstandings, hurt feelings and boredom.

2. Physical Insulation -

The thickness of the hair. Those with thin, fine hair you are refined emotionally. There is a tendency to be slower to act. Gentleness is their attribute. Quality is more important to them than quantity. Their feelings are quite sensitive to outside influences. Romance them and again move slowly. Remember, what you do for them is more important than how much. If someone has thicker, coarser hair he/she is action oriented. Ruggedness is their strength. Quantity is more important than quality. They are less prone to take things personally. Sex is more of a physical act than a romantic one. Expect little, if any foreplay. How much you do with them or for them is what counts. A person closer to your insulation will make for a more natural flow emotionally and a great sex life.

3. Tolerance -

The distance between the eyes indicates tolerance. The wider the spacing, the greater the tolerance. They are more flexible, forgiving and tend to overlook problems. You'll find them open-minded and willing to experiment. Give them variety in the relationship. The closer the spacing, the less tolerant a person will be. They are not as flexible or forgiving and more willing to point out the difficulties. Expect them to be set in their beliefs and less open-minded. Find out what their beliefs are and don't violate them. Tolerance also indicates patience or impatience. It is very important for at least one of you to be tolerant. Intolerance and impatience won't give the stamina to stay in the relationship for the long term. Too much tolerance can lead to procrastination or letting negative things or people get out of hand before you do something about it.

4. Generosity -

The lips indicate how generous a person may be. Thick, full lips indicate spontanious generosityto friends and strangers and talkativeness (generous with words). Thin lips indicate selective generosity (only to those close) and conciseness (select with words). The thick lipped person might talk endlessly while the thinner lipped person wants to be brief.

5. Argumentativeness -

The chin shape is one indicator of temperament. Angular, wedge-shaped chins indicate an argumentative or stubborn nature. They will fight for their way and want you to give in first. Trial lawyers and military commanders commonly have this feature. Don't argue your point, appear to agree with them instead. Use phrases such as "I Understand", "I Respect", "I Appreciate". Let them think they're right and have won, then present your ideas. More rounded shaped chins indicate a more cooperative attitude. They are permissive and willing to give in. It's best to match up same chin shapes and not mix-match.

6. Money-Making Ability -

The nose indicates financial shrewdness. An angular, downturned "Roman nose" is called the nose for value. People with this nose tend to know the value of a dollar and are good price shoppers. Let them make the financial decisions and investments since they are experts at it. An upturned nose person will usually be more indiscriminate with money and a poor money manager. They are better off having someone else control the money.
7. Self-Confidence -

This is indicated by the width of the face. Broad faced people are more naturally self confident and willing to go after what they want with an, "I can do this" attitude. They usually take action with limited information and learn by the mistakes they make as they go along. They are natural leaders and make great salespeople or public speakers. In relationships they will go for who and what they want with confidence that they'll get it. Thin faced people lack natural confidence and must learn to be confident. They will take action only after they have all of the information in advance and have all of their questions answered. They have difficulty pursuing their ambitions because of the fear, "what if it fails?". Never push or force them into anything, they'll panic and run. They should be dealt with slowly and given all the information they need to make their decision.

8. Foot-Dexterity

This is indicated by the length of the legs compared to the length of the torso. People with long legs and a shorter torso have a poor center of gravity and are better "off their feet". They do well sitting down and will develop back problems if they are in jobs they have them on their feet constantly. Conversely, people who have shorter legs and a longer torso have an excellent center of gravity and do very well on their feet. They need to be on the move and are best in jobs that keep them physically active. On vacations, long-legged people might want to take a cruise, go on a bus tour or lie out in the sun. Short-legged people might want to hike up a mountain or go on a walking tour. Finding someone closer to your leg-length will make for more compatible activity and work interests.

9. Idealizing -

This is indicated by the setting of the ears. People with ears set below the tip of the nose tend to be idealists. They are looking for that Prince or Princess Charming and imagine how wonderful that person will be. They fall in love with the potential of a person and have difficulty seeing their partner realistically. People with ears set above the tip of the nose tend to be more realistic in their approach to life and relationships and will see people and situations as they are.

10. Communication Styles -

The eyebrows determine your style of communication. Flat eyebrows set closer to the eyes tend to be more direct in their speech and want the bottom line quicker. Arched eyebrows tend to be more descriptive and elaborate with details. This can drive the flat eyebrow person nuts because they don't want to hear every detail.

11.Possessiveness -

The depth of the ears. People with ears that appear to sit further away from the sides of the head (Ross Perot), are very possessive and have an extreme need to collect people, money, things. People with ears that appear to be sit closer into the head are less possessive or collector minded. In relationships, if you are with a possessive type realize that they think they "own you". Non-possessive types are more willing to let-live.

12. Emotional Expression -

The size of the eye's iris. People with naturally larger iris's are more apt to express their emotions and are sentimental. They are very romantic and fall in love quickly. They think more with their emotions and moods. Wine and dine them. Tell them you love them and they're yours. Smaller iris people are reserved emotionally and can be self-centered. They are slower to develop feelings for another and not apt to express them so easily. They think more logically and rationally. Telling them "I love you" too quickly can cause them to mistrust your intentions.

BODY TYPES

Ectomorphs -

Thin body. Ectos are primarily motivated by security financially, emotionally or intellectually. They want a safe, protected life and although quite slow to commit are quite loyal once they feel secure. They have a tendency to be loners and can be "alone in a crowd". Let them know that they are the most special person in the world to them. "I only have eyes for you" was probably written for them.

Mesomorphs -

Medium, athletic body type. Mesos are motivated by recognition, power or people Their body and physical appearance is very important to them. Compliments go a long way with these people. Especially when they are complimented on their accomplishments. Let them know how great they are and how proud you are of what they've done.

Endomorphs -

Large, heavy body type. Endos are motivated by acceptance, people and family. They will love people who accept them and become their friend. Accept them as they are and be their best friend then you've got them.

In any of these features or traits you may fit the extreme or be somewhere in the middle. It's important to combine the traits to complete the picture of the whole person. Some traits might conflict with others which accounts for people having conflicts in behavior.

It can also be great to use with your friends, family and co-workers. Face reading has been used successfully in sales, customer relations, employee hiring, vocation direction and courtroom jury selection. Plastic surgery or any other type of structural alteration can hide a trait. It doesn't mean the trait isn't there. A major philosophical change in attitude can change a trait so that it's expressed differently. Use this information for understanding yourself and others, not manipulation!

Introduction to Body Language

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Introduction to Body Language

We are witnessing the emergence of a new kind of social scientist-the non-verbalist. Just as the birdwatcher delights in watching birds and their behaviour, so the non-verbalist delights in watching the non-verbal cues and signals of human beings. He watches them at social functions, at beaches, on television, at the office or anywhere that people interact. He is a student of behaviour who wants to learn about the actions of his fellow humans so that he may ultimately learn more about himself and how he can improve his relationships with others.

It seems almost incredible that, over the million or more years of man’s evolution, the non-verbal aspects of communication have been actively studied on any scale only since the 1960s and that the public has become aware of their existence only since Julius Fast published a book about body language in 1970. This was a summary of the work done by behavioural scientists on nonverbal communication up until that time, and even today, most people are still ignorant of the existence of body language, let alone its importance in their lives.

Charlie Chaplin and many other silent movie actors were the pioneers of non-verbal communication skills; they were the only means of communication available on the screen. Each actor was classed as good or bad by the extent to which he could use gestures and other body signals to communicate effectively. When talking films became popular and less emphasis was placed on the non-verbal aspects of acting, many silent movie actors faded into obscurity and those with good verbal skills prevailed.

As far as the technical study of body language goes, perhaps the most influential pre-twentieth-century work was Charles Darwin’s The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals published in 1872. This spawned the modern studies of facial expres-sions and body language and many of Darwin’s ideas and observations have since been validated by modern researchers around the world. Since that time, researchers have noted and recorded almost one million nonverbal cues and signals. Albert Mehrabian found that the total impact of a message is about 7 per cent verbal (words only) and 38 per cent vocal (including tone of voice, inflection and other sounds) and 55 per cent non-verbal. Professor Birdwhistell made some similar estimates of the amount of non-verbal communication that takes place amongst humans. He estimated that the average person actually speaks words for a total of about ten or eleven minutes a day and that the average sentence takes only about 2.5 seconds. Like Mehrabian, he found that the verbal component of a face-to-face conversation is less than 35 per cent and that over 65 per cent of communication is done non-verbally.

Most researchers generally agree that the verbal channel is used primarily for conveying information, while the non-verbal channel is used for negotiating interpersonal attitudes, and in some cases is used as a substitute for verbal messages. For example, a woman can give a man a ‘look to kill’; she will convey a very clear message to him without opening her mouth.

Regardless of culture, words and movements occur together with such predictability that Birdwhistell says that a well-trained person should be able to tell what movement a man is making by listening to his voice. In like manner, Birdwhistell learned how to tell what language a person was speaking, simply by watching his gestures.

Many people find difficulty in accepting that humans are still biologically animals. Homo sapiens is a species of primate, a hairless ape that has learned to walk on two limbs and has a clever, advanced brain. Like any other species, we are dominated by biological rules that control our actions, reactions, body language and gestures. The fascinating thing is that the human animal is rarely aware of his postures, movements and gestures that can tell one story while his voice may be telling another.

PERCEPTIVENESS, INTUITION AND HUNCHES

From a technical point of view, whenever we call someone ‘perceptive’ or ‘intuitive’, we are referring to his or her ability to read another person’s non-verbal cues and to compare these cues with verbal signals. In other words, when we say that we have a ‘hunch’ or ‘gut feeling’ that someone has told us a lie, we really mean that their body language and their spoken words do not agree. This is also what speakers call audience awareness, or relating to a group. For example, if the audience were sitting back in their seats with chins down and arms crossed on their chest, a ‘perceptive’ speaker would get a hunch or feeling that his delivery was not going across. He would become aware that he needed to take a different approach to gain audience involvement. Likewise, a speaker who was not ‘perceptive’ would blunder on regardless.

Women are generally more perceptive than men, and this fact has given rise to what is commonly referred to as ‘women’s intuition’. Women have an innate ability to pick up and decipher non-verbal signals, as well as having an accurate eye for small details. This is why few husbands can lie to their wives and get away with it and why, conversely, most women can pull the wool over a man’s eyes without his realising it.

This female intuition is particularly evident in women who have brought up young children. For the first few years, the mother relies solely on the non-verbal channel to communicate with the child and this is believed to be the reason why women often become more perceptive negotiators than men.

INBORN, GENETIC, LEARNED AND CULTURAL SIGNALS

Much research and debate has been done to discover whether non-verbal signals are inborn, learned, genetically transferred or acquired in some other way. Evidence was collected from observation of blind and/or deaf people who could not have learned non-verbal signals through the auditory or visual channels, from observing the gestural be-haviour of many different cultures around the world and from studying the behaviour of our nearest anthropological relatives, the apes and monkeys.

The conclusions of this research indicate that some gestures fall into each category. For example, most primate children are born with the immediate ability to suck, indicating that this is either inborn or genetic. The German scientist Eibl-Eibesfeldt found that the smiling expressions of children born deaf and blind occur independently of learning or copying, which means that these must also be inborn gestures. Ekman, Friesen and Sorenson supported some of Darwin’s original beliefs about inborn gestures when they studied the facial expressions of people from five widely different cultures. They found that each culture used the same basic facial gestures to show emotion, which led them to the conclusion that these gestures must be inborn.

When you cross your arms on your chest, do you cross left over right or right over left? Most people cannot confidently describe which way they do this until they try it. Where one way feels comfortable, the other feels completely wrong. Evidence suggests that this may well be a genetic gesture that cannot be changed.

Debate still exists as to whether some gestures are culturally learned and become habitual, or are genetic. For example, most men put on a coat right arm first; most women put it on left arm first. When a man passes a woman in a crowded street, he usually turns his body towards her as he passes; she usually turns her body away from him. Does she instinctively do this to protect her breasts? Is this an inborn female reaction or has she learned to do this by unconsciously watching other females?

Much of our basic non-verbal behaviour is learned and the meaning of many movements and gestures is culturally determined.