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<channel>
	<title>Almost Retarded</title>
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	<link>http://www.almostretarded.net</link>
	<description>Almost Retarded.  Not Fully, Just Almost.</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Fri, 13 Aug 2010 05:17:02 +0000</lastBuildDate>
	<language>en</language>
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		<item>
		<title>Boat full of Tamil refugees?</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/08/13/boat-full-of-tamil-refugees/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/08/13/boat-full-of-tamil-refugees/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 13 Aug 2010 05:17:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[BREAKING NEWS kinda]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[canada]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nonsense]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rant]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[retarded]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[scammers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[what?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[refugees]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tamils]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[taxes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/08/13/boat-full-of-tamil-refugees/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[	

<iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/08/13/boat-full-of-tamil-refugees/&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=true&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:60px"></iframe> 

They should get some tug boats out there to push that boat back into the middle of the ocean so it can go back to Sri Lanka. Canada shouldn&#8217;t burden [...]]]></description>
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<p>They should get some tug boats out there to push that boat back into the middle of the ocean so it can go back to Sri Lanka. Canada shouldn&#8217;t burden the tax payer with having to pay for every reject that washes up in a boat looking do a free ride.. </p>
<p>Fuck</p>
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		<item>
		<title>Stupid mother fuckers</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/18/stupid-mother-fuckers/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/18/stupid-mother-fuckers/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 18 May 2010 20:22:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[douchebags]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rant]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stupid]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[retards]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[train]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/18/stupid-mother-fuckers/</guid>
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It&#8217;s not your fucking car you stupid bitch, it&#8217;s a fucking public train, if you want to save seats take your car to work and save a seat in that, [...]]]></description>
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<p>It&#8217;s not your fucking car you stupid bitch, it&#8217;s a fucking public train, if you want to save seats take your car to work and save a seat in that, douche.</p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>When is it acceptable to hit a Woman?</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/14/when-is-it-acceptable-to-hit-a-woman/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/14/when-is-it-acceptable-to-hit-a-woman/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 May 2010 20:15:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[makes sense]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[obvious]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[what?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[women]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/?p=965</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[	

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If she&#8217;s ugly, rides a motorcycle, and hit you first, it might be acceptable to punch her out. She&#8217;s practically a dude with a vagina..]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[	

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<p>If she&#8217;s ugly, rides a motorcycle, and hit you first, it might be acceptable to punch her out.  She&#8217;s practically a dude with a vagina..</p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Arizona hates Mexicans</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/04/arizona-hates-mexicans/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/04/arizona-hates-mexicans/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 04 May 2010 15:04:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[GO USA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[douchebags]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mexicans]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[scammers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[3rd world]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Americans]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Arizona]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Immigration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mexico]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[obviously obvious]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[United States]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/?p=962</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[	

<iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/04/arizona-hates-mexicans/&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=true&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:60px"></iframe> 

Well yea.. duh! You know who can change this?  Mexican Americans. C&#8217;mon guys.  All those illegals you know, help send them back.  Your extended family wants to come to America [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[	

<iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/04/arizona-hates-mexicans/&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=true&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:60px"></iframe> 

<div class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 323px"><img title="Mexicans" src="http://www.almostretarded.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/mexicans1.jpg" alt="" width="313" height="282" /><p class="wp-caption-text">We Still have Texas!</p></div>
<p>Well yea.. duh!</p>
<p>You know who can change this?  <a target="_blank" class="zem_slink" title="Mexican American" rel="wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mexican_American">Mexican Americans</a>.</p>
<p>C&#8217;mon guys.  All those illegals you know, help send them back.  Your extended family wants to come to <a target="_blank" class="zem_slink" title="United States" rel="geolocation" href="http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=38.8833333333,-77.0166666667&amp;spn=10.0,10.0&amp;q=38.8833333333,-77.0166666667%20%28United%20States%29&amp;t=h">America</a> in suitcases and car trunks?  Say no!</p>
<p>No one is after the legal Mexicans, but when you make it easier for Illegal Mexicans to be in the US illegal, things like <a target="_blank" class="zem_slink" title="Arizona" rel="geolocation" href="http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=34.0,-112.0&amp;spn=3.0,3.0&amp;q=34.0,-112.0%20%28Arizona%29&amp;t=h">Arizona</a> happen.  Being illegal is illegal, so why are you fighting it?</p>
<p>Mexican Americans, help your illegal brothers and sisters go back to <a target="_blank" class="zem_slink" title="Mexico" rel="geolocation" href="http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=19.05,-99.3666666667&amp;spn=10.0,10.0&amp;q=19.05,-99.3666666667%20%28Mexico%29&amp;t=h">Mexico</a> so that you can have a better life, it&#8217;s only going to suck worse when the US looks like Mexico.  Where are you going to go, <a target="_blank" class="zem_slink" title="Canada" rel="geolocation" href="http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=45.4,-75.6666666667&amp;spn=10.0,10.0&amp;q=45.4,-75.6666666667%20%28Canada%29&amp;t=h">Canada</a>? It&#8217;s cold there.</p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Why do fat people dress like furniture?</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/03/why-do-fat-people-dress-like-furniture/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/03/why-do-fat-people-dress-like-furniture/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 03 May 2010 12:50:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[fatty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[angry fat chicks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fashion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Furniture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lolz]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/?p=959</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[	

<iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/05/03/why-do-fat-people-dress-like-furniture/&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=true&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:60px"></iframe> 

I saw this fat lady get on the train this morning and she looked like patio furniture, and I laughed.  Maybe I laughed a bit enough to pee a little. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[	

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<p>I saw this fat lady get on the train this morning and she looked like patio furniture, and I laughed.  Maybe I laughed a bit enough to pee a little.</p>
<p>Ok.. Well, whatever, it was funny. The lady looked like she could camouflage herself next to a patio umbrella.</p>
<p>I said to myself &#8220;Man, most of these fat chicks have no <a target="_blank" class="zem_slink" title="Fashion" rel="wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fashion">fashion sense</a> and will wear anything.  It&#8217;s unfortunate though because the clotes are so big, and the print as so big that you know you must have seen it somewhere.  It&#8217;s always from furniture.</p>
<p>Here is an example:</p>
<div class="wp-caption aligncenter" style="width: 423px"><img title="Fat Chick" src="http://www.almostretarded.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/plus-size-clothing.jpg" alt="" width="413" height="550" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Fat Chick</p></div>
<div class="wp-caption aligncenter" style="width: 501px"><img title="Italian Sofa" src="http://www.almostretarded.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Kokkola%20Couch%20Formenti%20Italy.jpg" alt="" width="491" height="250" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Italian Sofa</p></div>
<p>Ok.  Well maybe it wasn&#8217;t a great example, but I&#8217;m sure you&#8217;re giggling.</p>
<p>Till next time..</p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Cock eater</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/18/cock-eater/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/18/cock-eater/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 19 Mar 2010 00:54:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[AIDS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[reality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[what?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Autos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/?p=954</guid>
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<iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/18/cock-eater/&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=true&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:60px"></iframe> 

This Miata would be cool if it didn&#8217;t look like it wanted to eat your cock.  No wonder gays like Miatas..]]></description>
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<p><img class="alignnone" title="om nom nom nom" src="http://www.almostretarded.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/mx-5-blackamp-mat-04.jpg" alt="" width="512" height="341" /></p>
<p>This Miata would be cool if it didn&#8217;t look like it wanted to eat your cock.  No wonder gays like Miatas..</p>
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		<item>
		<title>NHL Trade Deadline</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/11/nhl-trade-deadline/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/11/nhl-trade-deadline/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 11 Mar 2010 17:23:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Leeroy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/?p=945</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[	

<iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/11/nhl-trade-deadline/&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=true&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:60px"></iframe> 

TSN is reporting that the Toronto Maple Leafs have offers pending for Ponikarovski, Primeau, Stepniak, and Carlton the bear. I came up with some ideas of what these trades would [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[	

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<p>TSN is reporting that the Toronto Maple Leafs have offers pending for Ponikarovski, Primeau, Stepniak, and Carlton the bear.</p>
<p>I came up with some ideas of what these trades would look like and what teams would be interested.</p>
<p>The Deal:</p>
<p>Toronto Maple Leafs: Ponikarovski</p>
<p>To the Buffalo Bills: Thurman Thomas.</p>
<p>The Leafs would then trade Thurman Thomas to the Toronto Argo&#8217;s in exchange for the Sky Dome.</p>
<p>The Leafs would then trade the Sky Dome to Washington for Ovechkin and there Zamboni driver Carl.</p>
<p>Leafs trade:  Stepniak</p>
<p>To the Pittsburg pirates for the rights to Al Macinnis, Doug Gilmour, and Joe Carter.</p>
<p>The Leafs would then trade all but Doug Gilmour back for the Pittsburg Pirates 25th round draft pick, and a pitcher to be named in the future.</p>
<p>Leafs trade: Primeau</p>
<p>To the Toronto Raptors for future considerations and a level 500 seat.</p>
<p>The Leafs Trade: Carlton the Bear</p>
<p>To the Buffalo Sabres: For Ryan Miller and Lindy Ruff, also the rights to the Buffalo Bills NFL franchise.</p>
<p>The Leafs also trade Wayne Gretzky and Vince Carter</p>
<p>To the Calgary Flames: For Jarome Iginla, 1 red sweater, 1 red olympic mitten, and 1 ounce of Darryl Sutters saliva.</p>
<p>BREAKING NEWS !!</p>
<p>Leafs trade .. Kaberle to Done King in exchange for Mike Tyson and a 1 armed pelican.</p>
<p>Kelly Gruber was traded to slut ville for a bucket of popeyes chicken.</p>
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		<title>Toronto: First snow fall of the year</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/11/toronto-first-snow-fall-of-the-year/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/11/toronto-first-snow-fall-of-the-year/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 11 Mar 2010 17:23:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Leeroy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.almostretarded.net/?p=892</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[	

<iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/03/11/toronto-first-snow-fall-of-the-year/&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=true&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:60px"></iframe> 

It is December 9th and we finally got our first snow fall of the year here in Toronto. This is not something un-expected, usually we have our first snow fall [...]]]></description>
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<p>It is December 9th and we finally got our first snow fall of the year here in Toronto. This is not something un-expected, usually we have our first snow fall in November. We were warned about this as a winter storm 10-15 cm&#8217;s accross the GTA we had lots of warning. Yet for some odd reason people still havent put snow tires on there car yet. This morning it took me 1 hour to get to work, usually this takes me 20 minutes. People on the road were slowly moving along at about 20 kms or lower. Though I complain about people driving too fast this is a situation when people were driving too slow. I understand its better to be safe then sorry, however most of these people I noticed were driving these cars that shouldnt even be on the road. Rear wheel drive Lexus on low profile all season tires, or Infiniti G35&#8242;s, or Hyundai Genesis all without snow tires. These people should not be drving these cars in this weather. Your holding up traffic and your going to cause a damn accident.</p>
<p>I driving a Jeep with brand new All Terain tired cut through the snow like a hot knife through butter. Unfortunately there was so much traffic i couldnt get around anyone and was stuck behind all these slow ass holes. Again im all for being safe but really this is actually dangerous, these cars shouldnt be driving in the snow anyway.</p>
<p>At one point I got my Jeep 4&#215;4 up to 100 kms when traffic broke I began passing everyone in and out of lanes shooting snow all over everyone. I know they were yelling in there cars (fuckin asshole) but I have 4&#215;4 I have a Jeep and I have brand new all terain tires on it. It would take a whole lot to make me slide even going at 100kms an hour.</p>
<p>If your going to drive through the winter in your sports car at least buy some winter tires. If not take it off the road. If not purchase an SUV, a real SUV one that haas 4&#215;4 .. not AWD,,or 4&#215;2 or 4 matic or anything else. People dont understand the difference.</p>
<p>4&#215;4 means that your 4 wheels all move at the same time no matter what. People with All wheel drive vehicles think that they are the same. No they are not, AWD other then Subaru and some others transfer power to the wheels that are not slipping. Its good on gas to do that but its a false sense of safety.</p>
<p>Im going to get a sticker made for the back window of my Jeep that says &#8230;.</p>
<p>ON WEEKENDS I RESCUE:</p>
<p>HUMMER&#8217;S</p>
<p>MERCEDES</p>
<p>BMW&#8217;S</p>
<p>CRV&#8217;S  OR HONDA PILOTS</p>
<p>Dude your SUV sucks, its made to haul groceries you soccer mom</p>
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		<title>Should be a cock in her hands&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/02/12/should-be-a-cock-in-her-hands/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/02/12/should-be-a-cock-in-her-hands/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Feb 2010 18:39:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[whores]]></category>
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No wonder she&#8217;s having so much fun&#8230;]]></description>
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<p><img class="alignnone" title="skeet skeet skeet..." src="http://www.almostretarded.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/video-gaming-2.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="318" /></p>
<p><strong>No wonder she&#8217;s having so much fun&#8230;</strong></p>
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		<title>Gameskore.com</title>
		<link>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/02/12/gameskore-com/</link>
		<comments>http://www.almostretarded.net/2010/02/12/gameskore-com/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Feb 2010 17:00:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sempire</dc:creator>
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Gaming start-up Gameskore is going to be one of the biggest revolutions in gaming. Also it will be a great way of showing your sugar daddy what gaming is all [...]]]></description>
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<p>Gaming start-up <a target="_blank" href="http://www.gameskore.com" target="_blank">Gameskore</a> is going to be one of the biggest revolutions in gaming.</p>
<p>Also it will be a great way of showing your sugar daddy what gaming is all about.</p>
<p><img class="alignnone" title="Usually they are Fillipino, but maybe this one is from the Ukraine" src="http://www.almostretarded.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/41.jpg" alt="" width="470" height="339" /></p>
<p>But in all seriousness, keep an eye on <a target="_blank" href="http://www.gameskore.com" target="_blank">www.gameskore.com</a> to see when it&#8217;s online (which should be sometime July/August 2010)</p>
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