always Early

time flies

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Mon, 20 May 2013 03:26:00 +0000

oh my gosh! I can't believe it's been over two week since I blogged! Not that I'm surprised about it...just that it feels like I just did it!

I guess a lot has been going on. I've been working like a crazy person on recovering those camper cushions I mentioned in a previous post. The cushions are finished and have been delivered, but I still need to make the curtains before the weekend hits. Then, after the curtains are finished, I have to make four (or six? idk) pillow covers, repair a pocket on a pair of jeans, replace a zipper in a dress, mend/alter some things for my little family, make EB a ton of cute pinafores for the Summer, and sew like mad for baby boy. Oh, and recover the glider cushions, make new crib sheets, paint walls, etc etc etc. And repair a bathing suit. It never ends! I can't wait to be finished with paid projects so I can just make whatever I feel like making.

And then there's the fact that Emerson has been sick for almost three weeks (on and off). Right now she is on antibiotics for an ear infection. I'm having trouble knowing if her grumpy attitude and all the yelling (etc) is because she simply doesn't feel well or because she's basically 18 months old and that's just part of it. I've also found that I am extremely impatient and pretty grumpy myself. The Summer heat has already hit, so I fear I won't be more pleasant any time soon. Not getting frustrated so easily is definitely something at which I have to make a conscious effort. I miss my happy, sweet, kind baby!

I've got less than four months before Felix is due to arrive and I honestly have no idea how I'm going to finish everything. I'm probably not going to. Who cares, though...I guess. Well..... I care. A lot. I should probably get over that.

all the ice cream

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Thu, 02 May 2013 23:52:00 +0000

Seriously. ALL the ice cream; that's what I am eating as I write this post. It has been a rough week. Between last Thursday and yesterday, Chris worked something like 65 hours, and has his two three-hour nights at school. So, I pretty much have spent the entire week alone with Emerson. I love Emerson, but this much time with so little adult interaction is not good for me! I'm not complaining about the work, or the school, or Emerson. I'm mostly complaining about how exhausted I am. I am just too tired to deal with EB's sudden onset of allergies (I think that's what's going on?!!) and subsequent crying-screaming-and-whining. I am not strong enough to pin both her arms and hold her head and administer some medicine by myself. I attempted this about forty minutes ago. It didn't go well.

In fact, it went so terribly that Emerson and I both screamed and screeched with frustration for three minutes. Then, we both cried for twelve minutes. For the next seven minutes we stared into each other's eyes, simply too tired to do anything else. Then I rocked my sweet baby girl and apologized and snuggled and hugged and kissed her for twenty minutes. I am emotionally (and physically) drained. And I'm twenty-one weeks pregnant, which basically means that I am double drained.

In other news, I had an OB appointment today. My doctor went over the ultrasound with me. Everything looks great. She asked how much Emerson weighed at birth. Eight pounds and two ounces. She then informed me that baby boy will probably weigh about eight and one half pounds, based on the measurements they took last week, the fact that he is my second, and the fact that he is a he. So, I'm going to go ahead and bet that he'll be closer to nine pounds. A VBAC is not looking so great! Oh, other great news--the clinic office called and asked to reschedule my September 5th appointment, you know, the appointment that takes place one week before my due date. My doctor apparently won't be in the office that day (is that code for her being out of town?).

Basically, I want to curl into a ball and not wake up until September. Even at some point after the delivery is fine. Whatever. Now I have to go work on some paid sewing projects until bedtime. Is this real life?

KCW Days 6 & 7

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 17:10:00 +0000

Yeah, days six and seven didn't really happen. But I'm still super proud of myself for completing five days! On Saturday I cut out pieces for some teeny tiny shoes for baby boy, and I sewed them together on Sunday morning. I still need to add some snaps and something fun and/or personalized. So, technically I did do something, but I'm not really going to count it.

Anyway, just wanted to check in and be held accountable for my lack of sewing. ;)

And, just for fun, here are some bad cell phone photos of EB in day five's top.
I will definitely be making more of these!

halfway

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 15:18:00 +0000

I meant to write this post yesterday, but it just didn't happen. I've officially made it halfway through my second pregnancy! Only twenty(ish) weeks to go!

It's been a pretty easy pregnancy so far, but we're creeping into the weeks where, for me, swelling begins. Swelling--the most miserable part of my pregnancies (pregnancy, rather, since I've only done this once before). Last go around, my feet and ankles started swelling at 22 weeks, and between weeks 22 and 26 I doubled my weight gain. Coincidence? I think not. And this time I'll be swelling up in the hot hot summer heat. This first half of this pregnancy has flown by, but the second half--the July-August-September part especially--is bound to be the most miserable time of my life.

Let me backtrack a little... I mentioned doubling my weight gain above. By 22 weeks with EB, I had gained 10.5lbs; and by 26 weeks, 21lbs. When I checked in to the hospital to be induced, I had gained a whopping 49 pounds! And then, four days after EB was born, I was up 51 pounds. This is the part where I brag about how much I love my body (well, not the way it looks, but the way it works). I never exercised before I was pregnant with Emerson, I certainly didn't exercise during that pregnancy, and I hecka didn't exercise between that pregnancy and this one. The closest I got to my pre-pregnancy weight was just two pounds over. What an amazing body I have! My metabolism (and the breastfeeding) did all the work for me! I'm not sure that I'll be so lucky this time, so I'm prepared to work at it. Maybe I'll work at it in either case--gosh I'd love to be back to my wedding weight!

Anyway, I know these long written posts are boring, and not really an organized collection of thoughts, but mostly it's for me to look back on and remember all the little details that I know I'll forget eventually. If there's one thing you should take away from this post, it is that you should probably avoid me at all costs come this Summer. Consider this a warning...

KCW Day Five

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Fri, 26 Apr 2013 18:53:00 +0000

Phew. It's still before 2pm and I've finished today's project; a simple little tank from True Bias. I discovered this pattern through Cherie at you and mie. When I read that the pattern was free and only available in size 2T, I knew I had to make it!

I used fabric leftover from the first crib sheet I made for EB's nursery, and instead of following the pattern instructions and using single fold bias tape to finish the edges on the inside, I used a narrow double fold bias tape and let it all hang out. :) Oh, and I used the tape for the opening at the back, and left long tails to tie, instead of a button and fabric loop. Aaaaand I hemmed it with the tape, too... Super easy pattern, and I think this might be my favorite piece from the week!

KCW Day Four

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Fri, 26 Apr 2013 14:43:00 +0000

This dress! I don't know what happened, but it turned into a nightmare for me. I worked on this for several hours yesterday. I intended to do buttons and buttonholes, but by the time 9pm rolled around, I was just ready to be finished with it. So, snaps. Again. And yes, it does need a good press. And the neckline is wonky. And I'm not even going to talk about what it looks like on the inside; I'm keeping that secret to myself.

I did feel better about it though, when Emerson woke up and saw it taped on the wall and exclaimed "dress!!"

Another Geranium Dress, with the faux cap sleeve, cut out neckline, and pleated skirt with pockets. I did shorten the skirt so I could do a small rolled hem. For today's project? I'm thinking sweatpants. With the serger. Something that takes ten minutes...

KCW Day Three

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 13:19:00 +0000

Here's my KCW Spring 2013 Day Three item! I actually made the bulk of this top on Tuesday alongside Day Two's tank. I finished it last night. I think I like this one more than the other. Again, way too big for Emerson, but that's better than too small!

baby boy

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 12:04:00 +0000

It's a BOY! I was surprised. And then I was surprised that I was surprised. I always guess incorrectly! Little boy was not shy about sharing his gender, but he didn't really care for showing his face; his hands were in the way almost the entire time. A couple hours before the ultrasound, we finally decided on names. For a girl, Vivienne Eleanor. And for a boy, Felix Leopold. Actually, if I'm to be completely honest, the name we chose before we saw him was Felix Aloysius. BUT after the ultrasound we both agreed that he should be Felix Leopold instead (a name which was not even on our top 20 boy list). I love it. I'll be honest, I was a little bummed that EB won't have a sister close in age (I never did, either), but I am very excited to experience raising a little boy. I hope sewing for a boy is fun; maybe I'll try to come up with something for him before KCW Spring 2013 is over with...

KCW Day Two

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 14:34:00 +0000

Here's day two's (yesterday's) results!
I really did finish this yesterday, but Chris and I were so wrapped up in choosing baby names (ultrasound is today), that I didn't have a chance to photograph it.
And, I will be honest, I actually made two. The second top isn't finished, so I'll finish it today and count it as today's work since, you know, I'll be busy buying either a little boy or girl outfit this afternoon. :)

Pattern from this Japanese pattern book.

KCW Day One

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Tue, 23 Apr 2013 00:47:00 +0000

I did it! I completely finished a new dress for Emerson today!

The lighting is bad. The photos are less than thrilling. But here is the dress in all its glory...

front

back

For day one I chose the most basic style of the Geranium Dress (love this pattern, by the way!);
basic scoop neckline, faux cap sleeves, gathered skirt, and snaps. Snaps used to scare me, but I'm so glad I got over that--they are way faster and easier than making buttonholes!! In my opinion, that is.

killing time

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 16:04:00 +0000

I am writing this post on my phone, because Emerson wanted to play outside today. We have been out here for about one and a half hours, and I am really hoping that all this messy outdoor play will result in an extremely long afternoon nap. I am anxious to sew today! I did manage to cut out one dress this morning and it should sew up rather quickly. Other news of the day (since I have nothing better to do out here, and you have nothing better to do than read this): I haven't changed a poopy diaper in more than 48 hours, this new baby will probably never have a name, my house is "clean enough," and I hardly have an appetite lately (which I'm guessing is normal for a summer pregnancy? I never really want to eat in the summer, but I thought being pregnant might change that...).

for good

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Sun, 21 Apr 2013 01:34:00 +0000

I think I need to take a more permanent break from Facebook. I love keeping up with my friends and seeing photos of their little ones, etc. BUT I absolutely can not stand the posts of those who feel the need to announce to the entire world just how "blessed" they are.

Don't get me wrong, I feel blessed myself. Blessed in that my family is healthy. Blessed in that I didn't ruin that prom dress last week. Blessed in that I am happy with my life and the people in it.

And sure, I am also blessed that I have few unmet wants. However, I don't blast all over Facebook that "I am blessed" and immediately follow that statement with a three paragraph list of all the material possessions that I was able to buy with my undisclosed (but seemingly large, although I'm sure those closest to me know better) regular income.

I don't know why I am so bothered when others do this, but I nearly can't get over it. The older I get, the more disgusted I become by the consumerism I see around me. But not many people I know really 'get' that it is the consumerism that bothers me--most probably assume that I am just jealous of their giant his & her's walk-in closets. Actually, no. That is not it at all. It's the fact that people believe that their giant his & her's walk-in closets somehow elevate their importance in the world. Everything is a competition. And I am very competitive when it comes to the things that I do, not the things that I have. And I am particularly not competitive when it comes to the amount of money I paid for something (unless the competition is how little one paid for the something).

So, the next time you give me a tour of your house and show me your giant his & her's walk-in closets and then sympathize that poor little old me doesn't even have a bedroom that would be considered the master, let alone one walk-in closet (and by the way, the only reason you know this is because you invited yourself on a tour of my home at that barbecue last fall)... know this: all I'm thinking is how terribly sad it is that you believe you need so much clothing.

Get over yourself. Shame you'll never be content with what you have really been blessed with. It'll never be enough, you know. Gotta have more, more, more.

to do

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Sat, 20 Apr 2013 15:07:00 +0000

Why is it that (much more often than not) the things one wants to do are at odds with the things one needs to do? It's really annoying. For example, I want to get started on my Kid's Clothes Week projects, but I need to finish (okay, begin) working on a paid sewing project (recovering camper cushions, making new camper curtains and pillows, etc). I know that once I start on the cushions it will take less time than I anticipate to finish them--my projects usually turn out that way.

In any case, I need to go do something. And at this moment something means that I need to get Emerson up from her nap and let her play outside. I loathe outside. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if I could sew outside...

So, while I'm doing that ^^^^
You can check out the fabulous things I plan on making for the KCW Spring challenge.

One or two Geranium Dresses (pattern from Made by Rae)
Two tanks, one pair of shorts, two skirts, and maybe a pair of pants from this book. (Specifically items g, f, v, i, and b.)

I can't wait to get started!

a bigger picture

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Thu, 18 Apr 2013 03:05:00 +0000

Something I want to be better at: being in more photographs with my family. I literally have hundreds (thousands?) of pictures of Emerson's first year of life. Photos of she and I together during that time? Maybe twenty-five. Another thing I want to be better at: not: deleting/hiding/complaining about/disregarding the photos that I think I look terrible in. When Emerson is older and sees photographs of me, she will probably think I look like a big weirdo no matter what... even in the photos that I love! I guess, most of all, that I want her to see that I was there, that I loved her, and that I have a lot of terrific and precious memories that, out of the two of us, I'm responsible for preserving.

So, here you go. Thirteen photographs of me and EB. The good, the bad, and the "ugly.":::

P.S. I think there might be even fewer of Chris & EB; and fewer still of all three of us.

baby in my butt

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 15:19:00 +0000

A couple months ago, Emerson was having a hard time falling asleep. I ended up rocking her for 30-40 minutes. A really strange thing happened, though. She didn't want me to hold her like I normally would--with her head on my shoulder. Instead, she insisted upon scooting way down onto my extended legs (resting on the ottoman) and resting her head on my belly. We hadn't really talked about the baby in mommy's belly, but it was like she just knew. I can't explain it. The whole event may have been brought on by her then-fascination with belly buttons, but that's not what it felt like.

So we started mentioning the baby in mommy's belly, occasionally. We ask her to be gentle, say hello, give loves, etc. And every time I relax into the couch and pull my shirt up to expose my belly (is it just me, or is that something that most pregnant women do? ...in the privacy of their own homes, of course) Emerson will come and kiss my bare skin or give me a little pat.

Does she really have any idea what's going to go down in five months? Highly unlikely. In fact, in the above photos I asked her where the baby is and she pointed to my butt. Yeah, EB, we get it; mom's got a big butt... Will she be okay with the big change? I really hope so. The good news is that she love-love-loves babies. As in, sits in her rocking chair and pats her baby doll's back as she rocks. Such a little caregiver, already.

the decision

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Tue, 16 Apr 2013 15:48:00 +0000

I am in a bit of a dilemma. I had a Cesarean delivery with Emerson. My doctor has cleared me for a VBAC, if I want to do it. But I can't decide!

The facts:
EB had the most perfect little round head.
I didn't labor at all, really, before the C.
EB was born at 39 weeks and was just over eight pounds.
Recovery was painful.

So I keep going back and forth in my head:
GO VBAC: recovery will be so much easier, especially since I've got a toddler to care for, too.
NO VBAC: omg, what if I don't go into labor until the kid weighs ten pounds and I labor all day and end up with a C, anyway? I don't even know what the freak a big fat contraction feels like; why put myself through a new pain when I can go with what I already know and can be prepared for?
GO VBAC: but a C is seriously major surgery; do I really want to put my body through that again?

I guess the very worst possibility would be planning for one and ending up with the other. Or dying. That would probably be worse.

one year

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Mon, 15 Apr 2013 16:03:00 +0000

Easter 2012 | 3.5 months

Easter 2013 | 15 months

It is truly extraordinary how things can change in a short one year's time. I was barely pregnant for Easter 2011, and Easter 2010 I was still in school and not even thinking about kids. It's hard to believe that by Easter 2014 I'll have a two year old and a seven month old.

It is strange, isn't it? How a year can drag on forever or speed by in a flash? In my life, time seems to be constantly picking up pace. Four months ago, Emerson was not walking. She was not talking, really. Now she walks--she runs. She talks non-stop (she's using 50+ words on her own (BRAG)!!!). She takes naps on a big-girl bed. She has preferences, makes choices, expresses wants and needs, throws fits, blows kisses. And get this--she even has started telling us when she needs to poo, and GOES IN THE TOILET!!! Granted, it's only happened twice (but it was two days in a row!). She is constantly keeping us on our toes. It's easy (for me) to get stressed out about what she should be doing and learning. Are we challenging her enough? Can she do that? Should she be able to do this? Fortunately (in most instances) Emerson has been an independent little person who often leads us in the parenting department.

One last thing on my mind... How the heck am I supposed to not laugh when EB tries to bite my toes? It is HILARIOUS. I guess I just need to think of how terrible it would be if she started biting other kids. That might help me keep a straight face...

things I want to say, but don't really want to FB

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Sat, 13 Apr 2013 18:07:00 +0000

I recently took a break from Facebook and it was glorious. Two weeks of not obsessively logging in, checking out the pages of those who I intentionally have blocked from my feed because they annoy the crap out of me, etc.

I'm back on FB now, but it seems pretty boring and pointless now. BUT I still have things that I want to say. Hence this blog post. Here it goes:

I'm pregnant again!! Yes, it was planned. No, I'm not sick. Yes, been there--done that. I know nobody really wants to hear about my boring second pregnancy, but I'm a stay-at-home mom to a toddler--I don't really have much else to talk about. And I WANT to talk about this new baby! (Due September 13, by the way.) I want to talk about how quickly this pregnancy is whizzing by, how we haven't even talked about names, and I want to talk about how scared I am to commit to trying a VBAC.

Speaking of being a mom to a toddler... I want to talk about her, too. A lot! I want to talk about how smart and funny and cute and observant she is. I want to talk about every trip we take to the zoo, every time she does something new, every word she says (or can't say), and every frustration I have with teaching and caring for her.

There is a lot more I want to talk about, but my mind is sort of exploding right now, so I'll save it for later. Except for this: being a mom is really difficult. and lonely. and tiring. BUT, I love it.

Six Months

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Sat, 13 Apr 2013 17:49:00 +0000

A small little collection of photos that we took on the day Emerson turned six months old.

The Nursery

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Sat, 13 Apr 2013 17:48:00 +0000

Feeling guilty about all the photos we take that stay on our hard drive and are never seen again!

Here are photos of Emerson's (first) bedroom; before we bought our house and moved out of our ghetto rental.

Yes, I realize that these are on Facebook, so they HAVE been seen, but I'm working up to new crap. ;)

^ letter E from Hobby Lobby

^ name banner from baby shower, changing table thrifted, dresser rescued from sure destruction and refinished by EB's Pop.

^ cross stitch by me, whale and Jesus thrifted.

^ dollhouse bookcase from Craigslist, piggy banks gifted.

^ crib from Walmart, shark art from Hobby Lobby, mobile & bedding made by me.

^ handmade doll, flower print, shark embroidery, and turtle dove painting gifted. shark print (below) from Etsy, pink shark print free download, pregnant stick person (below) from my baby sister.

^ glider from Craigslist, cushion made by me. letters from Hobby Lobby, clouds made by me.

^ drawer pulls from Hobby Lobby.

Growing

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Sat, 15 Sep 2012 16:24:00 +0000

I still don't understand how this was possible!!

The Operating Room

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Wed, 11 Jul 2012 13:58:00 +0000

It is so hard to believe that these photos are over six months old! Things to note:

1. Emerson's legs show that she was definitely a breech baby. Sort of makes me wonder if those nurses who had to check so many times to see where her head was were wrong. I guess we'll never know!

2. I am SO DRUGGED! My skin is sickly. I almost look like I'm half asleep.

3. Chris is the cutest new dad ever!!!

a little background information

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 15:08:00 +0000

Emerson Beatrix was born December 22, 2011. We call her EB, E, or Emerson. We do not call her Em, Emmy, and certainly not Trixie. She is the light of our lives.

You want a birth story? There's not a whole lot to tell. My doctor asked me if I wanted to be induced at 39 weeks. I blurted out an affirmative. It was probably not the best decision I've ever made, but my baby is happy and healthy and here; I try not to beat myself up about it. Why would I? Because I ended up having a c-section. Bummer, I know. Here's how it went down:

We arrive at the hospital at six or seven in the morning (it's all a blur now). They weigh me, strip me, stick me, and start pumping that pitocin. I had gained 48 pounds! I really hate being naked! The nurse misses my vein with her first IV attempt! Pitocin! Actually the pitocin is not bad at all, not yet anyway. Before they get started, two different nurses check me to make sure E's head was down. Neither nurse is 100% sure, so they do a quick ultrasound to confirm. We start pitocin around 8:00 or 9:00am. At 1:30pm I am dilated to four centimeters and my doctor comes to break my waters (what a strange feeling, by the way!). Then she says "I don't think that's her head. Yep, that's an anus."

Emerson had been quite wiggly all morning, but she had been wiggly my entire pregnancy. Later they asked me if I had felt her flip. How was I supposed to know what that felt like? So now my baby is breach and we have to go the c-section route. I am terrified! I had literally covered my eyes when, in our birthing class, they showed a computer generated simulation of how it worked. A knife! My body! I cry. They stop the pitocin and we wait for the anesthesiologist. I will say that once my water was broken I really started to feel those contractions. I don't think I was prepared for a vaginal delivery.

Sometime before 3:00pm, Chris and I get ready to see the inside of an operating room. They take me first, and say Chris would be allowed in once they got me all prepped and numb. The spinal. I feel like I'm floating and have zero cares in the world. The anesthesiologist had informed me that about 3% of people get a little tingly in the fingertips. My whole hands are rather numb. This thing really works for me. Next, things get a little scary. Fortunately I'm so relaxed that it doesn't faze me.

I roll to my side, they do the spinal. I roll back. My legs keep falling off the table. They insert the catheter. They give me some anti-nausea medication. Then I hear the nurses. My blood pressure has dropped, along with my heart rate, and Emerson's too. "Is Dr. Litherland here, yet?" "She's right outside." "Get her in here!" I see people rushing around. A nurse quickly (and messily) squirts the iodine on my belly. I see her turn towards the door and frantically wave the doctor in. Dr. L is cool and collected. The nurses inform her that E's heart rate is eighty something beats per minute. "Is that mom's heart rate?" she asks. "No, mom's is [sixty something]."

Somewhere in all this I've asked the anesthesiologist if someone has gone to get Chris, and he has sent someone to get him. When Chris arrives, they've already started. He is there for maybe one minute before I feel a sense of tugging and then hear a cry. It takes a second to realize that they are finished and that cry is hers. Chris goes to watch them dry her off and warm her up and take pictures and pretty much be the cutest dad I've ever seen. I say something and Emerson turns her tiny, perfect head towards me. Bliss!!

Emerson Beatrix arrived at 3:08pm on December 22, 2011. She weighed in at eight pounds, two ounces. She was 22 inches long. She was perfect.

slow clap

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 14:20:00 +0000

It has been way too long since I've blogged! A lot has happened. Emerson is now six months old. Chris was promoted at work. I quit my job to stay at home with E. We are house hunting. Our ten day vacation to Buffalo, New York is just five weeks away. That's just off the top of my head. Please bear with me as I try to do a little catching up. And please forgive me if by catching up I mean posting a crap ton of photos of my baby (and that is precisely what I mean). xo

Oh, and the title? I'm just trying to motivate myself to keep blogging by envisioning all (32) of you seeing that I'm making an effort and participating in a unanimous slow clap heard 'round the world; or at least at 32 different keyboards around the world... ;)

the kiss

noreply@blogger.com (Tasha Early) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 21:24:00 +0000

My little brother is married.

Crazy.

12.17.11