South Korea and Japan are both home to large numbers of United States troops and neither are going to invite a nuclear attack.  The Kuomintang, which the US backed, retreated to Taiwan when they lost power and China still asserts their ownership over the tiny island and the US continues to honor their agreement to defend Taiwan.  Russia has been discharging dollars and acquiring gold while Brazil is bucking the buck.  Neither China nor India have significant reported physical gold holdings; they need a hedge to the major currency illusions.  In my book The Great Credit Contraction the liquidity pyramid represents the FRN$ will be the last major currency to evaporate.

The Euro’s evaporation has increased and ultimately has only one outcome.  Sure, Germany wants to retain its voice on the world stage and is faced with a Hobson’s choice of bailing out Greece and eventually the other unproductive free-riding members of the Euro or let the Euro evaporate and lose their relevance on the world stage because Germany only matters if Europe as a whole matters.

CREDIT DEFAULT SWAPS

But the Damocles sword of credit default swaps, which is falling toward’s Greece, can, ultimately, be measured only against gold because gold is no-one’s liability.  Just like the Chinese have feigned their interest in acquiring gold; many sophisticated investors have feigned ignorance of gold’s monetary role.  Many sophisticated investors, like George Soros who broke the Bank of England doubled his gold position in Q1 2010, Paul Tudor of Tudor Investments, John Paulson, David Einhorn, Eric Sprott, Jim Rogers, Peter Schiff, John Embry and many others are likewise allocating their capital based on the premise that gold is a major world currency.

Even Janet Tavakoli, a former adjunct associate professor of derivatives at the University of Chicago’s Graduate School of Business, and author of six books on derivatives recently wrote:

U.S. credit default swaps currently trade in euros. After all, if the U.S. defaults, who will want payment in devalued U.S. dollars? The euro recently weakened relative to the dollar, and market participants are calling for contracts that require payment in gold. If they get their way, speculators on the winning side of a price move will demand collateral paid in gold.

The market can create an unlimited number of these contracts very rapidly. The U.S. wouldn’t have to ever default to trigger a major disruption in the gold market.

The fiat currency and fractional reserve banking system is merely a confidence game built on an illusion and fraud.  Fiat currency is to be valued like the common stock of a government and in gold.  As such the current system will end and holder’s of capital will demand to be shown the money.  Just ask Harry Reid about karma.

The price of gold in evaporating currencies would not so much create a disruption in the gold market as cause a serious loss of confidence in the current system which would result in a tremendous increase in gold’s liquidity, hopefully through use by individuals in ordinary daily activities like what happened in Zimbabwe last year.  After all, who really needs to use fiat currency illusions and why?  In this case, we are seeing both China and India demanding to see the IMF’s gold, the Damocles sword jitters and there is only one protection.  Assets with intrinsic value.

Related posts:

1. In Defense of Speculators, Part III: Credit-Default Swaps
2. Gold And FRN$ Correlation
3. Ten Years of the Euro

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1. To what extent are perceptions of freedom based on objective factors?

In a news item today, I saw Domino’s say that they have 300 branches in India and will go up to roughly 500 in three years. With RBI giving out permissions for all foreign banks (put together) to open 18 branches in India a year, this means we’ll soon have more outlets of Domino’s in India than all foreign banks put together.

Related posts:

1. Health Care – A Crisis Of Central Planning
2. Central Bank Earnings
3. Interesting Readings for November 23, 2009

Turning to the old tried and true, I soon learned that I had started too late, and I was not nearly drunk enough to have properly anesthetized my nerves when I chanced to read Agora Financial’s 5- Minute Forecast report that “The CBO’s latest numbers reveal that President Obama’s proposed fiscal 2011 budget would add $9.7 trillion to the national debt over the next 10 years.”

My hands shook and my guts churned at the horrific prospect of adding $9.7 trillion to the money supply, which means (I gulp in horror at the prospect) inflation in pieces like you never saw! Yikes!

I mean, (my voice rising in pitch and volume) the entire GDP of the USA is about $14 trillion, and the government wants to increase, over ten years, government spending by 70% of everything that this country currently makes!

Apparently eager to change the subject since I seem to be getting worked up about this and could, possibly, probably, almost certainly, damned near guaranteed, erupt into some loud Mogambo Hysterical Tirade (MHT) and make a shambles of everything, The 5 says, “Further, the CBO projects the national debt will be 90% of GDP by the end of this decade”, which I guess they thought would calm me down or something, but it didn’t, which was bad enough to cause me to have chest pains accompanied by loud howls of pain and outrage in another tiresome Screaming Mogambo Fit (SMF), but then went on to make it all worse by saying that debt will equal 90% of GDP, which is “higher than the 83.4% recorded at the end of fiscal 2009 last fall.”

Suddenly, there was an uproar as I jumped to my feet and shouted “What kind of bizarre crap is that? The national debt is already $12.5 trillion in a $14 trillion economy, and somehow you add $9.7 trillion to $12.5 trillion to get 90% of the economy which means that …that…that…”

Well, I knew what I meant to say, but did not have a calculator handy, and the security guards had me by the arms and were hustling me out of the room pretty quick.

I later found out that what I meant to say, but did not have the figures handy, is that this means that the CBO thinks that, unbelievably, in ten short years, a staggering $22 trillion of national debt will be 90% of the economy, which means that the CBO thinks that the economy in ten years will be, I gulp to report, $24 trillion, which is a whopping 71% higher than today! I am stunned!

What can one say but, “We are freaking doomed!”

Perhaps hearing my plaintive voice with its unmistakable undertone of angry paranoia and wanting me to calm down, The 5 says, “We’re 100% certain this comment will elicit the customary response: ‘Look at Japan, its debt is 170% of GDP…and it’s been running massive deficits for years!’”

I think to myself, “Okay, they just take time to raise the blade of the guillotine higher and higher, but the end result will be the same, and if anyone thinks that Japan proves otherwise, then I laugh the Mogambo Laugh Of Scorn (MLOS) at them and turn around to wave my buttocks in their faces in a final fillip of disrespect!”

The 5, in what I imagine is said with a deliciously snotty tone, says, “To which we can only sigh and respond: ‘Exactly.’”

Well, I can do more than that, because I am, after all, The Loudmouth Mogambo (TLM)! And I say that if all prices doubled, today, GDP (which measures spending) would instantly double, too! Hahahaha! Everything costs twice as much, but the economy looks like it boomed! Hahahaha! Welcome to Inflationary Hell!

I often marvel that it’s a good thing that the poor are usually ignorant or stupid, because if they could, or would, comprehend how this huge explosion of money is going to make prices rise and make them enormously poorer and more miserable, worse and worse, and probably for the rest of their lives, they would go freaking berserk.

As for the middle class, they are supposed to be smart and educated enough to know this stuff, but they don’t, and so they don’t understand the sheer enormity of how much poorer and miserable they will be for decades to come, either, and they will suffer, too.

Then there are those of us who are buying gold, silver and oil to protect ourselves against the ruinous, crushing, cataclysmic inflation in prices that this inflation in the money supply, and debt, will cause, because then, for us, it all becomes idle dilettantism and pleasure, which is, once you boil it down, the whole point of investing, isn’t it?

And could anything be easier? Whee! This investing stuff is easy!

CBO Budget Projections and the Horrors of Inflation originally appeared in the Daily Reckoning.

Related posts:

1. Inflation: The Economic Factor that Never Stops
2. Can budget deficits cure the debt problem?
3. Borrow and Spend Economics to Pay for Borrowing and Spending

The Manpower Employment Outlook Survey is conducted quarterly to measure employers’ intentions to increase or decrease the number of employees in their workforce during the next quarter. It is the most extensive forward-looking survey of its kind, unparalleled in its size, scope, longevity and area of focus. The Survey has been running for more than 45 years and is one of the most trusted surveys of employment activity in the world. The Manpower Employment Outlook Survey is based on interviews with over 61,000 public and private employers worldwide and is considered a highly respected economic indicator.

According to the Survey released on Tuesday, employers in most major labor markets expect to hire in the second quarter at a pace equal to, or stronger than, the same period last year.

Many employers have yet to reach their pre-downturn hiring pace, but prospects in the Asia Pacific, the Americas, Europe, and the US, are all registering modest improvements compared to three months ago and the same period last year. Employer hiring intentions are strongest in India, Brazil and Taiwan.

In the US, nearly three-quarters of employers surveyed say they plan to keep staff levels stable, Manpower said, while 12 of 13 industry sectors surveyed said they plan to add staff during the second-quarter. “We continue to see encouraging signs in hiring activity in the U.S.,” said Manpower CEO Jeff Joerres in a statement. “Key industries such as manufacturing and construction are seeing notable improvements on a year-over-year basis.”

The Manpower survey shows employers in 27 of 36 countries and territories expect some positive hiring activity in the second quarter. Employers in Panama were surveyed for the first time this quarter and report upbeat hiring plans for the next three months.

Of the 10 countries surveyed in the Americas region, hiring plans are stronger in comparison to one year ago in all countries where year-over-year data is available and stronger in six countries quarter-over-quarter. Regional hiring plans are again strongest in Brazil, Costa Rica and Peru. At the same time, hiring expectations from U.S. employers are stronger than those reported in the second quarter of 2009.

The survey adds to a mounting list of evidence that labor markets have turned the corner with healthy net US job additions in the months to come.

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1. More Data Shows Labor Market Positioned for Big Gains
2. More Convincing Reports Forecast A Jobs Rebound
3. More on Recession Proof Jobs

His story starts off that “The FDIC is even more broke than it was three months ago” to which most people rudely say, “Welcome to the club! Waddya think, we got some kind of picnic at the beach going on out here in the real world while you pretty-face hotshots talk about who is smarter and about some idiot named Mogambo who must be an idiot because otherwise he would not have such a stupid name!”

Mr. Wiggin goes on undaunted, perhaps buoyed by the knowledge that no matter what happens, he’ll still be better looking than The Mogambo. And smarter, too. And younger.

Maybe that’s why he did not seem to be registering horror at the news of the bankruptcy of the FDIC, and, as if to underscore my suspicions, you can almost hear the confidence in his voice as he explains, “The fund the FDIC uses to ‘insure’ your bank account went $20.9 billion in the red during the fourth quarter of 2009. That’s more than twice the deficit reported when the fund first entered negative territory in the previous quarter.”

Naturally, if these were the old days when the money supply was more-or-less constant, this would cause panic: “Our bank deposits are uninsured! Yikes! The Mogambo said we’d be wiped out and here it is, and he said to buy gold, silver and oil, and we didn’t, and now look at us! Oh, woe!”

But nowadays? Relax! We have a fiat currency that the Federal Reserve can, literally, create at will, at a stroke, all the money necessary to make sure that every Last Freaking Dollar (LFD) dollar in your account is fully protected against actual nominal loss; you had an electronic or paper buck, you will still have and electronic or paper buck!

Unfortunately (and you can tell there is a “catch” by the way the soundtrack suddenly turns gloomy and there seems to be the sound of somebody, in the distance, throwing up into a toilet) this huge, sustained increase in the money supply guarantees – guarantees! – that you will lose buying power in every one of your precious dollars, so you are kind of screwed, either way, when you stop and think about it, by Federal Reserve policies.

My Sensitive Mogambo Nose (SMN) detects (sniff, sniff, sniff!) detects panic. So, desperate for money, I look to prey on the superstitious, and suggest that maybe you should just send all of your “tainted” money to me so that my hoodlum friends and I can have a big ol’ party, where we will raise our glasses in a long series of toasts to you, to your health, and to your good luck because – hey! – attracting the attention of deities, paranormal powers, transcendental influences and cosmic forces could, conceivably, work!

Mr. Wiggin is not enthusiastic about my latest rip-off scam, which I suggest only because I am out of ideas and I am desperate for money. He suggests a perfectly legal and good way to get some money, which is, “As long as banks can continue to borrow from the Fed at 0.25% and park it in 10-year Treasuries for nearly 3.7% (and leverage it up, of course), we don’t see this changing”!

He’s right, of course, but before you rush out to start a bank and get your piece of this Federal Reserve stupidity, perhaps you should consider something along the lines of buying gold, silver and oil in some kind of wild, paranoid, knee-jerk reflex as a small, small part of a whole constellation of symptoms known collectively as Screaming Fear Of Outrage (SFOO) of the inflation that will be caused by such massive increases in the money supply, now additionally caused by the needs of the FDIC, but he goes on that it will get worse than that, as, “On top of that, the FDIC’s list of ‘problem banks’ grew during the fourth quarter from 552 to 702” he says! Yikes!

A long, haunting howl of dismay escapes my lips, perhaps not unlike the sound of ravenous, starving wolves howling, “oooOOOOOOooooooooh!” as they close in on your bloody trail as you crawl along, dressed in rags, wounded, bleeding, in the snow, at night, in the mountains, in a snow storm, with freezing sleet, and you realize that you can’t buy them off with your paper fiat money, but with a flash of True Mogambo Enlightenment (TME) that has come tragically too late, you realize that with the heft of a kilogram of gold in your hand, you can beat the living hell out of anything that comes near you that is metaphorically wolf-like in economic nature, or, with literal wolves, something spewing out .45 caliber bullets in a semi-auto fashion, putting us one more leg-up (as if we needed it!) on wolves of the literal kind, with politicians being of the metaphorical kind of ravenous wolves, thus mixing up literal with figurative, back and forth, up and down until you are in a panic, all confused and bewildered, wondering what’s real and what’s not, and your first instinct is to just start blasting, blasting, blasting until your trigger finger is bloody and cramped, and you manage to clear out a “Mogambo Dead Zone Of Safety (MDZOS)” all around you.

And you probably would have, too, if you had not remembered that you bought a lot of gold, silver and oil just to take care of situations like this! And it’s working perfectly! Ahhh!

But this thing about the “FDIC’s list of ‘problem banks’ grew during the fourth quarter from 552 to 702” is, as I notice with alarm, not only a number that is a huge (almost) 50% higher in just one quarter, a statistic which sets my Sensitive Mogambo Senses (SMS) tingling, as with two data points, a desperate-yet-handsome man like myself can quickly, and easily, discern some kind of Trend Of The Ugly Kind (TOTUK), to which I am particularly alert ever since I noticed that the entire freaking course of human history in the world, a world you call Earth, is the sad, stupid story of one stupid country after another borrowing money and getting into debt that they can’t repay, which is always resolved with inflation in prices, a bankruptcy of assets, and a ruinous war with somebody as we attempt to shift the cost of victim-hood from ourselves to foreigners so that there is, indeed, a free lunch for us.

Mr. Wiggin is not impressed with my penetrating analysis, which is in line with what everyone else agrees is pretty stupid and not worth reading or even admitting that they had even read, even in part, but I notice that he immediately takes up on my idea of “trend” that just I mentioned, and – surprise! – he finds, “Hmmm, let’s see. The number grew 27% in just one quarter. At this pace, every bank in the country will be on the problem list by the fourth quarter of 2012.”

An involuntary “Yikes!” escapes my lips. That’s a trend!

I, as are most normal people who understand how this “economics thing” works, am horrified by all of this, and the only saving graces were that I had gold, I had silver, I had oil, and I had enough firepower – within reach! – to provide calming relief to an otherwise paranoid, screaming, hysterical man, such as myself, pumping adrenaline from every pore in his primal outrage at the sheer terror that is being created by the Federal Reserve.

For some reason, I can actually feel your scorn, as you deride what you think is just another paranoid gold-bug gun nut Loonie-Tunes weirdo since the Federal Reserve can just create all the money and credit that the FDIC needs, so why don’t I, as I asked my kids, just shut up?

With that, I thought it was all over, until he went on, “Another tidbit from the FDIC’s report: Bank lending last year dropped at the biggest clip since 1942”, which was the year after we entered World War II, which seems important, but was a long time ago, and we don’t get to watch watching terrific war footage with things blowing up and – blam blam blam blam! – guns are firing! Things are on fire! It’s all exciting as hell!

Instead, we will note, much more soberly, that this is today we are talking about, not some ancient yesterday, and Americans are not the “good guys” bravely freeing Europe by destroying it all so that our industrial advantages are completely spared, but are, instead, the biggest bunch of feel-good, hyper-leftist morons that the world has ever seen where, despite a national emphasis on education, ample historical evidence, and the Constitution of the United States requiring that money be only of gold and silver, the citizens have allowed a pure fiat money and every kind of slimy flimflammery that such unbridled money supply would allow, which was, as you would guess, anything you could imagine.

The bad news is actually beyond that of mere bank lending being down, since nobody (except governments) wants to borrow money, since nobody has the money to buy anything anybody makes, so why invest money to make something that nobody will buy. The worse news is that bank lending is how money is created.

Money is, by definition, being destroyed, so that there is less money around with which to pay debts.

You know, without me telling you, that all this ain’t good! And these are the times when you are glad that you are safely invested in gold, silver and oil, and the only thing you have to worry about is, for instance, the usual stuff of keeping an eye out for party-killing suspicious strangers who may know your wife or boss, checking for suspicious pods growing near where you sleep, and protecting yourself against vampires, werewolves, and other blood-suckers, which leads us back to politicians deficit-spending, which leads us back to the Federal Reserve creating more money, which leads us back to buying gold, silver and oil in fearful response, which leads me back to, “Whee! This investing stuff is easy!”

Using Gold to Fend of the FDIC and Its “Problem Banks” originally appeared in the Daily Reckoning.

Related posts:

1. FDIC Adds Twenty-Seven More Banks to “Troubled” List
2. Is Your Money Really Safe with FDIC?
3. Gold and Silver Supply: Get Some While You Can

I was surprised to see how small the market reaction was (this image is from Yahoo Finance):

What am I not understanding?

Join the forum discussion on this post - (1) Posts

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(from the FT)

Germany and France are planning to launch a sweeping new initiative to reinforce economic co-operation and surveillance within the eurozone, including the establishment of a European Monetary Fund, according to senior government officials.

Their intention is to set up the rules and tools to prevent any recurrence of instability in the eurozone stemming from the indebtedness of a single member state, such as Greece. The first details of the plan, including support for an EMF modelled on the International Monetary Fund, were revealed at the weekend by Wolfgang Schäuble, the German finance minister.

“I am in favour of stronger co-ordination of economic policies in the EU and in the eurozone,” Mr Schäuble told newspaper Welt am Sonntag.

If France and Germany can agree on such proposals – long urged by Paris – they are likely to set the basis for the most radical overhaul of the rules underpinning the euro since the currency was launched in 1999. The German thinking emerged as George Papandreou, the Greek prime minister, flew to Paris to seek the support of Nicolas Sarkozy, French president, for his government’s drastic austerity programme.

“We must support Greece, because they are making an effort,” Mr Sarkozy said before the meeting. “If we created the euro, we cannot let a country fall that is in the eurozone. Otherwise there was no point in creating the euro.”

His words appeared to underline the greater readiness in France than in Germany to provide some sort of financial support or guarantee for the Greek economy. Angela Merkel, the German chancellor, insisted that no such support had been sought or discussed when she met Mr Papandreou on Friday.

Both France and Germany agree Greece should not turn to the IMF for support, so the idea of an EMF has clear attractions for Paris, though it could hardly be set up in time to help Greece. Mr Schäuble said: “We are not planning a competitor . . . to the IMF, but we do need an institution for the internal equilibrium of the eurozone that would have at its disposal both the experience of the IMF, and comparable intervention mechanisms.”

According to German thinking, the plan could include tough penalties for eurozone members that fail to curb deficit spending or run up excessive government debt. Ideas include cutting off countries that fail to curb deficit spending from EU cohesion funds, temporarily removing their right to vote in EU ministerial meetings and suspension from the eurozone.

Those may prove very difficult for France to swallow, given its own record of greater fiscal laxity than Germany.

Needless to say, this would draw the wrath from Euro skeptics and those, in general, opposed to tighter cooperation among Eurozone member countries. However, as Munchau argues splendid in another FT piece today; a monetary union needs a tight political and fiscal supranational framework to really make it work. Now, we must choose which solution we prefer.

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2. Poor Eurozone GDP Figures for Q4-2009
3. Danske on Eurozone Debt – The Peril of Internal Devaluations

Instead, it is actually true that demand created its own supply, like the “supply” of new “neighbors” at the storage place are demanding (“demand”) that I get that stinking, festering fecal mess out of there or they are going to sue me or something, to which I said “Great! I’ll pay you off with some of these ashtrays, which will make wonderful gifts for your friends and family!”

I bring this up not, as is often rumored, as a last minute appeal to you, the American consumer, to buy a bunch of these dog-poo ashtrays with their “keepsake quality”, and take them off my, literally, stinking hands, but to show you that one of the reasons why the economy is doing badly is that the latest unemployment numbers are Bad News Aplenty (BNA), as people do not buy as much stuff (demand) when they don’t make as much as much money, and the people who make stuff (supply) are then laid off, proving, once again, that supply follows demand.

And, since we are talking about it, people are not buying as much stuff, which I cleverly conclude from the fact that consumer installment debt has been going down since September 2008 as the American consumer is gradually, slowly, ever so slowly, almost glacially, paying down some of their super-sized, staggering $2.5 trillion in consumer installment debt.

How much? Consumers have, in a year and a half, paid down a measly $135 billion! Hahaha!

At this rate, one wonders, at 20% interest on the unpaid balance, how many freaking lifetimes will it take just for consumers to pay off their $2.5 trillion in existing debt, which doesn’t even count the debt they are going to incur in the future, just trying to buy the basics, as the inflation in prices from the insane inflation in the money supply makes things so costly that they get to the choice of debt or starvation, and even then, most people will buy food instead of gold, silver and oil.

Hoping to gently motivate them, and to provide the apparently necessary motivation delivered in a non-threatening, person-centric, positive way, I say, “Hey! You could stand to lose a few pounds there, chubby! Stop eating for a couple of days and use the ‘found’ money to buy yourself some gold, silver and oil, you moron!” but even then, they always act upset, like I said something wrong! See the kind of stupid crap I have to put up with around here all the damned time?

Anyway, their only hope is that everything survives a massive inflation, so that $135 billion dollars is, in terms of buying power, less than a week’s average minimum wage or something like that! Hahaha! Problem solved! Hahahaha!

In case you were curious, I put a lot of it down to the unholy combination of moronic do-gooders trying to save my life and greedy governments trying to drain my blood, as they, all over the place, raised cigarette taxes by several dollars per pack, so that the quarter of adults (54 million) who smoke a theoretical carton a week, have $40, $50, $60 sometimes more than $70 a week less money to spend on everything else, which comes to, at an average of $6 per pack, $3.24 billion per week, or a tidy $168 billion a year in lost spending power!

In short, tobacco addicts stopped buying other things so as to afford one thing that has become so expensive.

If they were smart, smokers would be spending their money on gold, silver and oil, waiting a little while until their prices soar as the government deficit-spends the massive, monstrous amounts of money that the Federal Reserve creates, and THEN taking up smoking when they could easily afford cigarettes at any price, the higher price for insurance, and the needed medical treatments, also at any price!

It’s enough to make you say, “Whee! This investing stuff is easy!”

Consumer Debt and the Supply-Demand Dynamic originally appeared in the Daily Reckoning.

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1. Supply, Demand and Price
2. True Fiscal Insanity: Creating Money to Buy Government Debt
3. Gold and Silver Supply: Get Some While You Can

I am also a guy who thinks that inflation in prices is the Thing Most Feared (TMF) in the whole world in terms of total sheer misery and suffering, judging by the entire last 4,500 years of history, except for, maybe, the plague.

Naturally, for one so dyspeptic and predisposed to paranoia because the people in charge are apparently overpaid, corrupt morons, I am visibly shaken at the news from Bloomberg that “The consumer-price index increased 0.2 percent for a fifth straight month, led by higher fuel costs, Labor Department figures showed today in Washington.” Yikes!

Inflation never stops! Even in a recession/depression like we have now! It’s terrifying!

Anyway, since insane levels of massive governmental deficit-spending of fiat money created by central banks is a world-wide phenomenon, there will be a massive inflation in consumer prices as a result of all of this unbelievably much new money being poured into the economy via governmental deficit-spending, and already the government is forced to report 2.6% inflation.

This is actually down from last month’s 2.7% inflation, and so immediately I get angry emails from people saying, “Dear Mogambo Stupid Head (MSH), You say that inflation is raging because of all the money that the Federal Reserve is creating, so how do you explain Bloomberg reporting ‘Excluding energy and food, the so-called core index unexpectedly fell 0.1 percent, reflecting a drop in new-car prices, clothing and shelter’? You can’t explain it because you are stupid and you are wrong and everybody hates you! Sincerely, Anonymous Reader.”

Well, as nice as it is to hear from my sister like that, it is doubly enjoyable this time because she is so wrong that I rate her as one who “has her own head up her own nasty butt” and I can hardly wait until Thanksgiving when everybody will be around the table and I can remind her of that ugly fact, getting back at her for what she said about me last year, by reminding her that she is so stupid (audience shouts out, “How stupid, Marvelous Manly Mogambo (MMM)?”) that she forgot to read farther into the article to learn that costs are being held down because “Even with higher production and material costs, US companies are reluctant to pass on the expenses to consumers”, which includes Wal-Mart, “the world’s largest retailer”, which “reported fourth-quarter sales that trailed its projection after cutting grocery and electronic prices” which, in a nutshell, explains why I am now screaming, “Inflation is here, you morons! It’s being temporarily absorbed by businesses and their stockholders making less money, and sometimes taking losses!”

That ought to shut her up pretty good, I figure, and if not, then I’ll scream at her until she confesses that she did not consider that the government now uses Hedonic Measurements of inflation, such as how that the turkey she is jamming into her pie-hole used to start getting stale and dried-out after a week or so in the refrigerator. But now, perhaps with the addition of small amounts of preservatives as part of a secret government experiment involving adding tiny little bits of nuclear waste during processing to produce enough radioactivity to kill all organisms that touch it, the leftover turkey will be just as tender and delicious a year from now as it is today!

Maybe even glowing, so you can make a sandwich in the dark!

This increased shelf life of the cooked turkey obviously increases the value of the turkey tremendously, and it also helps to deplete the nation’s nagging problem of its stockpile of dangerous, clumsy and expensive-to-store nuclear waste, producing a double benefit! Double!

Thus, the government calculates that the new, extra benefits of having turkey available for consumption for more days of the year (which is not a problem for my sister since she seems to be eager to eat lots of food, and she’ll probably finish the turkey carcass off pretty quick!), and simultaneously achieving a profound social good of disposing of dangerous radioactive waste, means that the turkey can never go up in price! Only the rising price of the new benefits makes it LOOK like it, because it costs more dollars per pound! Hahaha!

I am sure that she will come back with some of her stupid blah blah blah, but no matter what she says before I interrupt her, I am going to tell her that, even worse, the Labor Department report went on to say that “The CPI is the broadest of the three monthly price gauges from the Labor Department because it includes goods and services”, which was put in there to make you yawn and skip over the part that said that prices “showed 1.4 percent gains in both the cost of imported goods and wholesale prices in January”! Wowser!

As I said, inflation is the only thing that makes sense when considering such unbelievable, incomprehensibly massive increases in government borrowing-and-spending, overshadowed only by the enormous increases of money created by the Federal Reserve, and which makes sense since every doofus is town is yammering about how “inflation is impossible” and how “deflation is the bigger problem” since deflation means that the over-indebted middle class, the over-leveraged rich, the bloated financial services industry and the socialist government would lose, while inflation would affect mostly the poor, which are always the ultimate victim.

My suggestion to the poor? Buy gold, silver and oil immediately, because they will all rise right along with inflation, and probably more. Probably a lot more!

And if you don’t think that “the poor” today, after a half century of one bleeding-heart Congress after another finding ways to give them money and benefits, cannot come up with twenty bucks a month to buy an ounce of silver, then you don’t know squat about “the poor” in America today.

My suggestion to everyone else? Surprise! It’s the same! That makes it easy to remember, as in, “Whee! This investing stuff is easy!”

Inflation: The Economic Factor that Never Stops originally appeared in the Daily Reckoning.

Related posts:

1. CBO Budget Projections and the Horrors of Inflation
2. Borrow and Spend Economics to Pay for Borrowing and Spending
3. M0 Money, M0 Problems: Expect Massive Inflation in 2009 and Beyond