Bridging the Distance

Old Crushes #2

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Tue, 22 May 2012 15:41:00 +0000

My closest friends and I have been talking about our old crushes in emails. Some of us have never really shared our old crushes to one another, so I suppose it's high time that we shared our "skeletons in the closet". Well, not exactly "skeletons" ha ha ha...but anyhow...

It was interesting to note that some of us don't really know anymore why we ever had a crush to certain boys in the past (this feeling appeared when we looked up the boys in recent years or when we accidentally met them somewhere). However, some crushes are still memorable enough to tell. The butterflies in the stomach, being tongue-tied when we were face-to-face with our crushes, doing silly things he he he...

I remember that when I was around 15 years old, I started having a crush to a classmate. You can read the story here: Old Crushes.

When I met R2 for the first time, it was also VERY VERY nerve-wrecking because I had to suppress my feelings so much. I knew he was the one, but I just couldn't let my feelings control me because we hadn't met in real life yet. But the meeting was really "the final piece of the puzzle" (just like an Aussie emailpal phrased it - read this post to get a better idea: Missing A Friend).

Last night I was rereading my old emails and I found one email I wrote to a Belgian emailpal, telling him about our wedding plan (I wrote the email in 2005). He replied: "What? You're planning to get married already to a guy whom you met only once, and that meeting happened over a year ago? You're a brave girl!"

I didn't feel brave at that time. I just knew in my heart and guts that it was the right thing to do (I didn't think it was such a big decision except for the part where I had to leave my job, family, and friends behind and started life from zero again - but the part about him was something I was so sure about), so I suppose my heart was much stronger than my logic, because now when I REALLY think about it (with my logic), things COULD have gone REALLY wrong...but they didn't and I'm SO THANKFUL for it. :-D But if I had a daughter who said she'd get married to a guy she met once in real life, I would have probably not known what to do or say. Now I'm just stunned to think at how much my parents (esp. my Mom) trusted my judgment and choice. *bowing in respect*

glitter-graphics.com
P.S. Oh yeah, while we were talking about old crushes, come to think of it R2 had it "easy" because he didn't really have to ask my hand to my parents or anything like that. I mean, he came to Indo to meet my parents a few days prior to our wedding day, so my parents had accepted him even before they met him HA HA HA HA HA HA...Lucky him!!! :-D

P.P.S. A few years ago I showed R2 my class picture and told him to guess which one was the boy that I had a crush on. He scanned the pic for a little while and then pointed to the guy. I was shocked. I asked him how he knew. He said, "It's easy. I just picked the most handsome one of the bunch." GAAAAAHHH!!! NOT FUNNNN!!! HE HE HE HE HE...

The Highlight of Our Vienna Trip

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Wed, 16 May 2012 10:41:00 +0000

*cross-posted with my IF blog*

The highlight of our Vienna trip was actually the conversation we had with a mutual friend. This woman came to Sodankylä a few years ago and then went back to her home country. Back then we used to hang out every now and then and chat about anything. When she lived here, I was in the throes of TTC, so I shared with her our hopes and dreams.

So naturally after not having met for years, she asked us about baby program. She also told us that she had just started talking about having kids with her boyfriend. So I shared with her what we had experienced until we ended up with our decision to surrender to a life without kids.

She asked about adoption and I explained to her our decision. I didn't take it the wrong way 'coz I know she cared. Actually, sharing what I know about adoption and the maximum age difference between the parents and the adopted child made her think. She's now at my age when we started TTC, so she wants to learn more about her options IF for some reason the natural way doesn't work (though I hope it'll work well for her).

What really touched me and made me happy was the fact that she asked R2 about his job and life and R2 said, "I'm happy." It's one thing to hear from your spouse that he's happy, but it's a different thing to hear him say to someone else that he's happy in life. The unsaid words are "even without kids". :-D So I'm THANKFUL for this memory.

3BT: Random Days

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Tue, 15 May 2012 17:13:00 +0000

1. My yearly work evaluation went much better than last year. Got better marks than last year and positive feedback plus I got to tell my boss what I wanted to learn in my job.

2. Prior to my yearly work evaluation, in the morning out of the blue a customer told me something that really made me stunned. I can't believe how much warmth I've received from many customers!!! SO grateful for that!

3. Making plans for our summer holiday - and spotting a chance to experience an air balloon ride (though must save money first for that 'coz it's not cheap, but the possibility is really exciting!!!) WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

4. Almost all the snow has gone now and soon it'll be time to work out in the yard - raking the dead leaves we didn't have a chance to rake last autumn.

5. Being able to ride my bike in full speed is quite a feeling (compared with riding my bike in the dead of winter when there's snow and the temperature is so cold). Especially when the sun is shining! :-D

6. The food I cooked for Mother's Day for MIL was a success - as well as my flower picks and the gift. :-D

7. Finished reading "Baby Jane" by Sofi Oksanen (in Finnish).

8. Being able to save money this month (just got my paycheck) though I wasn't sure I could due to some things - but thankful for getting some extra hours last month.

9. After some time off translating the book my customer gave me, I've started continuing it again. Bit by bit. Phew! :-D

10. Talking about old crushes and silly memories via emails with my closest friends and having a laugh with them. Boy oh boy...

11. Customers who say "No need to hurry" whenever I try to half-run to the till from other spots in the store. THANK YOU, thoughtful customers!

12. People who are just like sun rays whenever I meet them - all bright and sunny and cheering up my whole being with their radiant smiles (not just pasted on smiles on the lips, but smiles that come from within).

Air Balloon Ride

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Mon, 14 May 2012 10:36:00 +0000

Over a decade ago (16 years ago to be exact) I wrote a dream list on places to visit and things to do. About a week ago when we were browsing on places to visit for our summer holiday, I saw an ad about an air balloon ride and it reminded me of my dream list. Air balloon ride is on the list and that's been kept at the back of my mind until I saw the ad.

Funny thing was that on the list, I also saw "a husband - nice and gentle" HA HA HA HA HA HA...and I guess that has come true.*GRIN*

Another dream that's come true is watching a ballet performance. The first time I visited Finland in 2004, I told my friend who lived in Helsinki (I spent some nights at her place) that I was interested in watching a ballet performance, so she booked two tickets for herself and me. It was quite an experience - watching a ballet performance. I must say that I don't really understand classic ballet, but I liked the modern version of ballet better (there were two parts of the ballet acts that we saw). And it was surreal to hear the tock-tock of the shoes on the stage. They were loud!!!

Anyway, back to my air balloon ride dream. Not sure yet if I'm going to be able to make it come true, but right now I need to find out some things first 'coz a friend of mine did such a thing once and she said that the box was pretty high (I'm only 145 cm, you see) and it won't be fun not being able to see anything much. And what's more, I need to save money for this first 'coz it's not going to be cheap he he he he...

Random Vienna Pics

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Fri, 11 May 2012 10:26:00 +0000

On the last full day we had in Vienna, we had a chance to meet a friend for lunch. Coincidentally it was such a lovely, sunny day, so we sat on an open terrace and got a suntan afterwards ha ha ha ha...She took us around an area and told us about where to go shopping and gave us ideas. It was just nice to catch up with her and enjoy the sun, too.

Anyway, this is what I ate that day. Spicy chicken briyani or something like that. It was DELICIOUS (and spicy enough that I didn't have to add any chili sauce)! :-D Forgot how much it cost, but it wasn't too outrageous.

R2 had Chicken Schnitzel, which was also delicious (he said). :-D

We found this guy in Stephansplatz area. The next day there was a different guy in another spot in Stephansplatz, doing something like this. In the beginning I was wondering if he was really a person 'coz he didn't move a muscle, but I noticed that the wind was blowing his sleeves he he...

And guess where this lady is sitting????

Voila! Uppppppp high on a Burberry store in Stephansplatz ha ha...I only noticed it when R2 was trying to find our way somewhere, so we were sitting on some benches and I was looking around the place.

From the same sitting spot, I zoomed in on this statue. Mind you that those are live birds he he he...it was funny 'coz there's a bird down there and it looked as if the statue were looking at it. :-D

And after lunch our friend sadly had to go to work, so we went to Marienhilf area to go shopping (she said it was a good shopping street and the prices aren't as high as in Stephansplatz). I found some pairs of leggings at such a good bargain and a pair of jeans on a discount he he...

Anyway, R2 saw the car and I told him to pose in front of it HI HI HI HI HI...

This building facade looked lovely, don't you think? Found this after we passed by Naschmarkt area and we were standing in front of one of the Asian supermarkets in that area.

Another random stuff we found there...a lovely ball on top of a building.

And I found this sign to be SO cute (I mean the dog is cute!)

OK, I guess that's all for now. Gotta prepare myself to work. Have a lovely weekend, people!!!

Albertina + Natural Arts Museum

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Tue, 08 May 2012 13:56:00 +0000

In Vienna we went to two museums. The first one was Albertina. They were displaying artworks made by the Impressionists, although there were also the abstract section, but we didn't go there because I'm not into that. We didn't use any audio guide for both museums, so we were just looking around at the paintings mostly. The Natural Arts Museum is FAR bigger than Albertina, but as usual we weren't allowed to take any pics of the places.

Anyway, here are some pics of Albertina. I was really fascinated by these stairs! I think the painting must be some kind of waterlily painting by Monet or something like that. Unfortunately there were only a few small Monet paintings there, though I would have loved to see more. I bought a thick and heavy Monet book when I was in Indo and I left it there. Maybe someday I should take it to Finland with me.

Then here's us after we ended our tour in Albertina.

While walking around the city, we passed by the building again, but from a different angle, so here's the pic:

In Natural Arts Museum, there was this one section dedicated to Klimt. It was a small but fascinating section, but what blew my mind was the sizes of other rooms of the building. It really had tall ceilings and some of the paintings were SO HUGE that if one fell over you, you'd be knocked out right away. To see the huge paintings well, I had to step farther back across the room in order to enjoy it. And there were so many huge rooms and paintings to cover that it took so long to finish (this is without audio guide, I can't imagine how much longer the tour would take with audio guide!!!).

The below pic only shows half of the museum, 'coz the other parts looked like they were being renovated on, so I didn't take a pic of that part.

Zooming in on the dome:

Anyway, in the middle of the rooms for the paintings, there was a really charming cafe with a lovely dome on top. I wasn't sure if we could take pics of the cafe or not, but I saw some other tourists doing so and nobody said anything, so I took a quick pic of the dome and the cafe from one angle. Here they are:

OK, that's it for today. It finally feels like permanent spring has arrived, but let's keep our fingers crossed so that no more snow will come ha ha...My MIL told me that in the old days, it was usual to snow still in June. Anyway, take care, people, and have a lovely day there!

Sisi Museum, Imperial Apts and Imperial Silver Collection

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Sun, 06 May 2012 10:19:00 +0000

Let's carry on with our Vienna trip diary, shall we? One afternoon we decided to visit Sisi Museum in Hofburg (in Stephansplatz), but turned out we got there too late. The Imperial Silver Collection closes at 5 pm if I remember correctly and we were there at around 4 pm. Luckily for us, the ticket lady told us that it took about 2,5 hours to cover everything, so she suggested coming another day. So the next day we went straight there to make sure that we got there early so we'd have plenty of time to see everything.

Because we knew we didn't have time to visit Schönbrunn Palace (which was farther away from where we stayed), we didn't buy the combined Sisi ticket with Schönbrunn, but if we had had time, we would have chosen that combined ticket. The tickets we paid allowed us to enter Sisi Museum, see the Imperial Apartments as well as the Imperial Silver Collection, but we were only allowed to take pics in the Imperial Silver Collection rooms. Mind you that the collection covered gold, as well. So it was really bling bling he he...

Again like in Mozart's House, we had to get audio guides so we could listen to the stories behind everything. It was really a vast place with lots of things to see and hear, so it did take about 2,5 hours at least to cover everything. Was it worth it? ABSOLUTELY!!!! It was amazing to see what a full set of dining table looked like in a palace in the old days including everything else they had to offer like stories about Empress Sisi (I hadn't known anything about her prior to this trip). It was amazing to see the piles of cutlery needed every day for the whole palace household (can't imagine having to wash them all every single day by hand ha ha...). Click here if you wanna see pics of Sisi Museum and read some stories.

This is a picture of Hofburg Palace from one side (there were so many buildings around it so I had to split the photo into two parts). Apparently they're renovating something there:

A pic of Hofburg from the other side - sorry I couldn't take a good panoramic pic without cutting some parts of the palace (either the dome or the lower side of the palace) ha ha...Click to see a bigger version.

Here are some pics from inside the Imperial Silver Collection. In the first pic R2 is listening to the audio guide (the tool he's holding with his right hand).

And apparently there's some Chinese influence, too, during a certain period of time.

After we finished this tour, we entered Sisi Museum and from then we could see the Imperial Apartments, but couldn't take pics. It was just interesting to know that if there's a certain banquet with the Empress for example, once the queen put her eating utensils, then the dinner was over, so Empress Sisi had to make sure that she was still holding the knife or fork until everybody else had finished eating. And there was also this rule that one could only talk to the one sitting on one's left or right in the palace dining table.

Another interesting thing to know was that King Franz Joseph was a busy man. He worked every day from morning till 10 pm (from around 4 am or 5 am). He accepted people to come to his work chamber and present whatever they wanted to tell and the waiting room for those people was the same. So it didn't matter what kind of rank or job the visitors had. They'd all be waiting in the same waiting room and each of them could meet the King face to face. :-D

We could also see Empress Sisi's bedroom. It was interesting to me that her bed was put almost in the middle of the room diagonally (no side touching the walls) and they put a screen on one side to separate it from a bunch of sofas. We were also told that it took three hours each day for her to do her hair. Geezzzz...while somebody did her hair, she was listening to another person reading books from Greek mythology or something like that.

What I didn't know was the tragic life of Sisi. At first Franz Joseph was going to be bethroted to Sisi's sister, but he fell head over heels in love with the young Sisi, so he proposed and she cried buckets upon hearing his proposal. She was never too much involved with the palace affairs 'coz she didn't like all that. Her eldest son killed himself and then she herself was stabbed to death by someone when she went abroad. Poor Franz Joseph was brokenhearted.:-(

Enough of this sad story, though. After visiting all the places, we browsed through the souvenir store and I found a pair of nice earrings. They're the replica of Empress Sisi's star-shaped hair jewellery. Mine is made of silver and Swarovski crystals. Price: €20. Oh hey, here I found Sisi Online Shop in case you wanna see the details.

OK, I'll end this here and continue with our travel diary later.

Dancing Lights

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Thu, 03 May 2012 14:50:00 +0000

I've been busy due to situations at work, so haven't had time nor energy to do anything much blog-wise, but today I've uploaded some Vienna videos and here are a few chosen ones (to watch more you can just click on my username in youtube).

The first video is a video of dancing lights on a tall building. It's right in front of our hotel window. I had to open the window and sit on the ledge (no balcony) to take this video he he...Every day while we were there this light dances started at 19.30 (7.30 pm) and the pattern kept on changing. That was why it was so interesting to watch it. :-D

The second video is a view of a part of Stephansplatz (the city centre):

OK, I'm pretty tired right now and R2's getting sick ever since he got back from Vienna (his voice has gotten sexier and he's been coughing and feeling weird, you know)...good thing we were both OK in Vienna, but now I'm starting to feel weird, too. So gonna take some time to rest 'coz my work schedule is getting busier again (summer season is approaching fast!!!). So TAKE CARE to everybody and enjoy the videos!

Vienna Trip: Stephansplatz #1

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Tue, 01 May 2012 11:44:00 +0000

The second day in Vienna started off sunnily. Before going to Stephansplatz, we went to find an Indonesia foodstore at the opposite direction. I knew I'd want to buy many things from there, so each of us brought a backpack. I had printed the map of the store: Toko Sederhana. It was about 2 km away from our hotel, so we were planning to go there and then back to the hotel to put everything we bought there and then we'd go around Stephansplatz to visit some museums or a church or something like that.

Here's a pic of us walking back to the hotel from the store...

Here are some views when we walked to Stephansplatz (about 4-5 km away from our hotel). R2 didn't want to use any public transit so we walked there everywhere.

Our first stop was Mozart's House. Unfortunately I couldn't take pics of the inside of the house but I found a link where you could see some videos/pics of the place: Mozarthaus Vienna.

It was the first time we used that kind of audio guide. So we paid the fee and got two gadgets like rather thick mobile phones and we had to punch in the numbers shown in each room/wall in order to listen to the explanation. We started off from the 3rd storey. The tour went SO long (around 2 hours or more?) that I was REALLY REALLY starving when it was finally finished. Here's a pic of me in front of the entrance:

So right after that we went to find a resto to have lunch ha ha...We didn't really know where to eat, so when we found some place that looked OK with menus on the wall, we just went in. We ended up in Lindenkeller. We had to go down some stairs, so it felt like being in a nicely decorated cellar. The food was OK. It was nice to dine in a place with a different atmosphere (something Sodankylä doesn't have).

R2 had some beer and schnitzel whereas I had goulash and pasta. The goulash was spicy and nice, but I had tasted much better goulash soup in Budapest (I've promised myself that if we go back to Budapest, we HAVE to go to the same resto again just so I can eat the goulash soup!!!) he he he...Here are some pics:

Then we toured around the area. Here's the link to the website if you want to see panoramic photos and read more info: Stephansplatz.We went straight to St. Stephen's Church and bought a ticket to go up to the tower by lift (sorry, didn't feel like walking a few hundred steps to the other tower 'coz we had been walking and we would still be walking for a few days around the city). The ticket cost €4.5/person. It got cloudy at that time and the wind was SOOOOO cold up thereeeeee!!! BRRRRRRRRRRRR...

Anyhow, here are some pics:

I think this is long enough now, so I'll separate the other photos in another post.

Vienna Trip: Prater

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 10:46:00 +0000

We arrived in Vienna on Sat evening, so we went out right away to find some food 'coz we were starving already. On Sunday because I thought other places may have been closed, we opted to go to the Prater. We were thinking of going to Madame Tussaud's Museum as well as the Giant Ferris Wheel. You can click the link to see the full info on Prater.

Here we were in front of Prater:

We bought a combo ticket for Madame Tussaud and The Ferris Wheel (cheaper than buying the tickets separately). And inside Madame Tussaud's Museum we took lots of pics, but I'm gonna share some only here... Me with Hitchcock. When I stepped on the bathtub, I heard a woman's scream and some more sound effects (you know, like in the movie), so it helped me pose like that ha ha....

Me and Kate Winslet:

Was trying to look for Leo's wallet HA HA HA HA HA HA...

Me and Thomas Muster:

R2 and Audrey:

R2 and Einstein. See the machine on the left back of the photo? It quizzes your knowledge by asking you questions (multiple choices) he he...We tried one part (10 questions) and we got 6 right out of 10 he he...

Don't wonder why he looked SO happy. She's his all-time fave actress (in terms of beauty, that is). :-D

And then we went to Ferris Wheel right across the museum (apparently we had to change the tickets we got from Madame Tussaud's Museum before we could queue to get into the Ferris Wheel). We had to scan the barcode part on the new tickets to the scanning machine in order to get in. And inside the place there were old Ferris Wheel carts and inside the carts they put miniatures of different scenes of the Ferris Wheel. Here's a view of one of the carts:

After we looked around at different miniatures in different old carts, we had to queue to be taken pics by their photographer (the scene was like we were inside one of the red Ferris Wheel carts, overlooking Vienna). It wasn't compulsory to buy the pics, but naturally many people did opt to buy a pic or two. They took 4 pics of us with different poses and we bought one for €9.80 (I'll scan the pic later). Then we had to go out and queue to get inside the Ferris Wheel. They also had this kind of dining cart where you could have a nice dinner, but we didn't try that he he...

Here's a pic of R2 inside the cart. I find it a bit annoying that there were two benches in the middle of the cart so it was hard to move around to take pics from different angles 'coz there were so many people PLUS the benches!!! GRRRR!!! But anyway....the cart swayed slightly while going up there, but thankfully not too much - otherwise I would be afraid of getting motion sickness ha ha...

Yep, it was a cloudy day and after going up the Ferris Wheel, it rained lightly but non-stop for a few hours at least and the weather got colder. Here's one view from up the cart:

Another view:

Another view...the building with the red top on the right is the entrance to Madame Tussaud's Museum.

OK, that's all for now and I'll share more pics later. :-D

Back from Vienna

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Sun, 29 Apr 2012 10:07:00 +0000

Hi, people! Had a great time in Vienna and then when we got back, I had to work 2 days straight, so haven't had time to do anything much. I didn't use the internet at all during our trip to Vienna, so when I got back my mailbox was flooded ha ha ha...

Anyway, the weather in Vienna was around 14-20'C during the day while we were there, but it could still drop down to 8-13'C during the night. One day it rained for hours (light rain), but on other days it didn't rain. The last full day we spent there was the hottest ever. There were almost no clouds in the sky and it got up to perhaps 20'C. We got some tan after spending hours in the sun. One of the highlights of the trip was that I could meet my Hungarian friend who was in Sodankylä for a year as a volunteer worker. The last time we met was probably 3 years ago at least he he...R2 knows her, too, so it was fun having lunch with our acquaintance. Plus she got to tell us some places and shopping street that she frequented. :-D

We stayed in Adagio Wien Zentrum and we found that it was a really nice hotel/apartment with a small kitchenette, a fridge, a microwave, coffee maker, etc. etc. etc. As per someone's recommendation in tripadvisor, I requested a room on a higher floor, facing the river and they manage to get us just that even though the management couldn't really promise us that when I sent my email (we stayed on the 8th floor).

We got a bit confused when we were in the lift, though...here's what the panel looked like:

So we went in and tried to press on 8, but couldn't find it, so had to read the panel first before we realized that D = 8 HA HA HA...and when we tried getting back down to the lobby, we also had the same problem 'coz we tried to find 0 in the panel, but turned out we had to press E.

Here are some pics of the room and the shower:

Here are the views from our room windows (I could open the windows and sit on the ledge to take pics HA HA HA HA HA...).

I aimed my camera to the right side of the window, then the left side, then the middle part. The white building with a dome on top is an observatory.

Notice the lit up rooms in the observatory pic above? In the evenings they held some kind of dancing lessons or exercise lessons there 'coz I've seen dancing women as well as some women doing stretches on mats. :-D

Here's a view of the hotel lobby (photo taken while we waited for our cab to drive us back to the airport):

One bad thing about staying in Vienna is that we couldn't watch any movies or TV series 'coz everything was dubbed in German, except some BBC channels and some news channels. Doh!!!

Here's a pic of me with flowers right outside the hotel. I was SO SO SO happy to be able to see so many blooming flowers around me ha ha ha ha ha...

Our conclusion after Vienna trip, though, is that we still LOVE Budapest more than Vienna. We feel that Budapest is a nicer place - plus cheaper, too!!!!(click on Budapest to read about our trip there last year) Plus we could still watch movies or TV series at night after we got back from roaming around the city ha ha ha ha...but anyway, we're THANKFUL to be able to go on this holiday and we've made many more travel memories together. I'm gonna share more photos later in several posts.

On Being Unique

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Mon, 23 Apr 2012 10:39:00 +0000

Note: I've saved this post in my draft folder for a while now...it wasn't properly finished yet, but I thought I'd just finish this right now and publish it.

There are advantages to having a unique face (read: the only Asian working in the store) in my line of work. For example, if I have done a little extra something for a customer, he or she will probably remember it better than if the deed is done by someone else. However, last year there was a surprising incident that happened while I was on my summer holiday.

Last year I earned 3 weeks of summer holiday, which was divided into 2 parts. After I got back from my first week of summer holiday, my manager told me that the other day a grandma came back and claimed that she had returned something to me, but I hadn't given her the money.

My manager checked my work schedule and found out that I wasn't working that day and then she found the receipt in the office (because everybody who returned things to get their money back had to sign a receipt) and she showed it to the grandma and asked, "Is this your signature?"

She said yes.

Problem solved...but I couldn't help thinking that because of my face and someone else's fading memory, I can also be accused of doing something or not doing something. Good thing there are receipts!!!

You see, many people living here are already pensioners, so I don't blame the old lady for her fading memories. But it was the first time that I felt the disadvantage of having a unique face: if I do make mistakes, it's easy for people to remember me! Fortunately speaking up till now people have been forgiving. THANK GOD for forgiving people!!!

glitter-graphics.com

Beauty Chronicles

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Fri, 20 Apr 2012 10:55:00 +0000

I've been talking to my Indo best friends about beauty and I've found something interesting. Each of us is different: different build/height, different eye shape/facial features, different skin colour, different personalities.

I asked them if they had ever felt beautiful in their own skin in Indo (esp. during teenage years) and based on their answers, it SEEMS that those who received positive feedback/validation from lots of people during childhood can still maintain that image of theirs in their minds (whether it's cute, beautiful, pretty) during their teenage years.

On the other end of the spectrum, during childhood some who received so many strong messages about outer beauty that was the opposite of what they had still remember very well that message even until now (for example: that darker skin is ugly). They were affected by this negating strong messages (that negated their own kind of beauty) at least until their teenage years.

However, in the middle of both extremes there are also those who never really received any positive nor negative feedback on their outer beauty and that led them to having mostly neutral POV on their own beauty during their teenage years.

glitter-graphics.com

This is only pure observation from childhood until teenage years and I don't claim that my POV is the right one, but I'm just wondering about the effect of messages given during our childhood. I belong to the latter group in which I had never really received any positive nor negative feedback on my outer beauty during my childhood and as such, in my teenage years, I mostly felt neutral about my outer beauty - there were times I felt beautiful, there were times I felt not too lovely, but most of the time I felt okay enough.

Now in my adulthood it's a whole different case, of course, as per what I've written down here: The Thing About Beauty.

3BT: Random Days

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 11:39:00 +0000

1. Both hubby and I were busy in front of our own computers (he was busy gaming) and then I went to turn on the printer (next to his computer) and was setting the layout for printing some documents and R2 clicked on the switcher so that I didn't have to do it. The switcher for the printer was on his computer desk and I had forgotten that the printer was linked to his computer at that time. LOVE his thoughtfulness!

2. A customer joked, "I like being served by you. The only bad thing is that I have to give you money." ROFL ROFL ROFL...He made me laugh and feel appreciated!

3. Another customer sharing her verbal appreciation of my service. You people don't know just how much I appreciate your verbal appreciation!

4. Going full speed on my bike the other day when the snow had melted from almost 80% of the sidewalk (though it's snowed again ever since then, but it was GREAT to be able to do that then).

5. Receiving my tax return calculation form today and realizing that this coming December I'd get more return tax than last year. WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! It's like being forced to save money. YEAH!!!!

6. Voice chat with my Japanese friend. It made her feel SO close! :-D

7. Watching this ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS video clip that made my day (better viewed in widescreen) --- a HUGE THANK YOU to Michelle Frost for having sent me the link via email:

Legacy

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 13:01:00 +0000

In the past even before we tried having kids (but especially when we were busy trying to have kids), there was always this thought at the back of my head that this blog of mine would be a kind of legacy for our kids, as well. I've written down so many things and memories, including our love story.

If I reread some of the older posts, the legacy tone kept on repeating itself in some posts. It used to be so painful, thinking of this loss, thinking of how much I would have wanted to share with our kids. It took a long time to let them go...Now that we've decided to live a life without kids, I have to renew my perspective on legacy. No matter how much earthly belongings we accumulate, they'll end up in other people's hands (not our kids' hands), so what would my legacy be?

I thought to myself, "Well, now this blog is my legacy to whoever is willing to read/listen. Proof of our existence. I hope that whoever has been reading has benefited from my posts, that they may learn from my mistakes, that they may be humoured/entertained by some of my posts, that they may feel less alone, that they can get a broader perspective in life by having read my perspective on things."

Now when I reread my older posts with the legacy tone, I don't feel the pain anymore. Instead, I feel that I've gone to the right direction - that when one can't change something, then one learns to surrender to it. Surrendering doesn't mean giving up. It means accepting the fact and learning to dance in the rain.

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Memories: Best Friends

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Sun, 15 Apr 2012 09:25:00 +0000

I have 6 friends whom I consider best friends from Indo. We all live in different places now. I met four of them in Junior High and 2 of them in High School. The degree of closeness between us varies and fluctuates, because we are all different people with different interests and each has such a busy life nowadays, but we still keep in touch until now (mostly via emails) and share our lives with one another.

All of us got our boyfriends rather late in life (either after we were at uni or after we graduated from uni), so that meant that we enjoyed so much quality time together without boyfriend troubles or without having to consider dates with boyfriends. Plus, 'coz some of us had long-distance relationships, that meant that we could still hang out together a lot. The first of us to get married was when she was 25 years old.

What did we do to have fun back then? Before any one of us started learning how to drive, we went by public transit to the cinemas. Mostly we just went to eat in a cheap restaurant, watched movies in a cinema, then browsed around the stores to look for cute stuff we couldn't afford buying. I'm sure shopkeepers used to dislike us 'coz we would touch so many cute things on the display and discuss them with one another without buying anything he he he he he hehhhh...

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After we got to uni, we became busier 'coz we went to different universities and faculties and we had different schedules and some of us had started becoming private tutors, but we still met quite often. By then we had more pocket money (esp. those who had started becoming private tutors) and some of us had got driver's licenses and cars, so we had more freedom. We usually just went to malls or stores and different cafes (trying out different cafes or restaurants), CD stores and cinemas. Or we just drove around in somebody's car around the city while talking about nothing and giggling. We'd stay in a cafe for hours and just enjoy being with one another. Some talks could become deeper, some were just us joking around and teasing one another. Another thing we loved doing was also stay in someone's place and talk and joke around. We'd also arrange sleepovers every now and then.

Life seemed more uniformed back then, esp. before we went to uni. After uni when we went to different faculties and universities and then we went to work, it seemed that life took us to very different directions 'coz by then some of us moved to different places already. It got harder and harder to really understand what's going on in my friends' lives, esp. if I haven't had any experiences in that area, but that doesn't mean that I don't try to understand as best as I can.

Anyhow, each of us has plenty of fond memories of those days (and each of us longs to repeat those days whenever the mood strikes). One time we even wrote a silly story together - each of us wrote some pages and then the others took turns in continuing it. Did we ever finish it? No, but last time I went back to Indo, I got the books from a friend who was the one keeping them for us. It was so funny to read how different personalities affected the characters and the plot. Yeah, the characters didn't stay the same throughout because each of us could change them as much as we could and I giggled like crazy when I reread the story.

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Some of us did have some clashes at some time, but it was mostly due to misunderstanding and once the misunderstanding was resolved, we all got back together again.

I remember that years and years ago, one best friend's much younger sister sharing her envy about our friendship at one time. At that time she had just moved to our hometown and she did have friends, but the friendship wasn't like ours. I was surprised to hear that, but as time went by I realized even more that what we have is so precious and that it's so hard to find best friends like these girls (not just people to hang out with and have fun with).

I can rely on them to keep my secrets and they've never backstabbed me nor said bad things about me. We've shared our innermost thoughts and feelings with one another - some more than others - but the main point being is that they've shaped me, helped me, supported me, encouraged me, inspired me, accepted me for who I am, entertained me, enlightened me, taught me things I'd never have learnt on my own, and in the end they have made my world all the more colourful.

3BT: Random Days

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Thu, 12 Apr 2012 11:26:00 +0000

1. Loving my bike's speedometer 'coz it encourages me to ride my bike even more (and faster if possible - sometimes when the road is icy or thickly covered in snow, it's impossible). Plus it's not expensive at all!

2. Rain!!! It means the temperature is warm enough to melt the snow bit by bit.

3. The upcoming free dinner paid by the company. It'd be nice to finally be able to sit down with all my colleagues and just chit-chat and laugh and enjoy a nice meal together without having to think about work.

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4. Missing hubby whenever I have an evening shift ('coz we'll only meet at night).

5. Remembering a fond memory of hubby that just warms up my heart no matter how grey it is outside.

6. Hearing news that there'll be a slight raise of the hourly wage because the union had fought for this for all of us in my field of work. Thank you, union!

7. They still had the lovely ice-cream at the store, so I bought a package yesterday (it's a special kind that only came in a certain batch and once the batch is gone, then there'll be no more).

8. Making kampanisut with MIL's recipe and it turned out just LOVELY!!! (I'd been craving for some lately - the day I baked it, I ate 3 right after they were done ha ha...)

9. Having a space to fume over something unpleasant I heard and feeling glad after having let it all out. :-D

10. Going back to normal after PMS and period mood wrecking out my balance.

11. The knowledge that my parents are proud of us, even though they have never said it verbally. And that they love us even though they don't actually say "I love you" verbally, either. This kind of knowledge is VERY precious and I cherish it with all my heart and soul.

The Orange Moon Setting

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Tue, 10 Apr 2012 18:15:00 +0000

Okay, I finally found a free video converter, but it was hard to choose the settings for the video...anyhow, here's my attempt at showing you how orange the moon was. It was that orange (just like what's shown on the video).

Cabin Trip Easter 2012

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 12:53:00 +0000

After work on Thursday we went to the cabin. The day started off sunny but then it got cloudy during the afternoon. We arrived at the cabin at around 4 pm and this time we had no trouble walking on thick snow 'coz it had condensed in many parts and became harder (compare it with Cabin Trip Feb 2012). There were tracks of cross-country skis in many places.

I forgot to note the temperature that day, but it was probably around 3'C under the sun and closer to 0'C after it got cloudy.

Here are some cloud pics...I LOVE taking pics of different cloud formations ha ha...

This is what the view on the frozen lake when we had just arrived there...

Zooming in on the above pic...

Then the dark clouds shifted and here was what it looked like...

Another view of the lovely clouds...

After taking those pics, we tried clearing the path towards the lake before we could get some water for sauna (not drinking water). Then R2 had to get some water, so again he had to do hard work to make a hole in the thick ice. At around 6 pm the sky got so dark again and snowstorm came. It probably lasted for about half an hour or an hour at most, then we enjoyed a very nice view of sunset at around 8 pm (click to view it in a bigger version).

After the sun went down, the sky was filled with stars!!! And a full moon! :-D

At around 5 am I woke up to pee in the outdoor toilet and I saw the HUGEST orange moon ever (I took a short video clip of it but I haven't converted it yet). The orange moon was dangling so low in the sky as it was about to set. I've never seen the moon that low and that huge and that orange before...just amazing!!! I tried taking pics of it but it didn't turn out great (it only looked yellow and it looked small). But anyway, this is a very lame pic of the setting moon...

I'm telling ya that the real deal was more orange than that. I just wish you could all see it for yourself...but anyway...here is why we had to clear up the path before we could get some water. Pic taken when we were on the way back to the car...

Yep, the sun was shining SO brightly on Friday and it was so warm. :-D Here's one other random pic I took when I was there...

OK, now I still have plenty of things to do...wishing you Happy Easter and for those who don't celebrate it...then hope you've all enjoyed a longer weekend! :-D :-D :-D

End of March Photos

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 11:00:00 +0000

Yep, not going to ramble about anything today...just wanna show you some photos I took last Saturday. Here they are...

It was snowing heavily during the afternoon...but then the sun was really persistent. It was peeping in the background. Quite a sight, actually. To see all the snow and the vague sun. :-D

These two photos below were taken about 15-20 minutes later, after the snow stopped falling. :-D

Don't you think that from this angle, it resembles the tongue of a snake? :-D

The Thing About Beauty

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 08:20:00 +0000

The other day when I was feeling upset (reflected in my post Somewhere I Belong), one other thing that bugged me at the time was a small exchange I made with someone in my FB list.

She had posted a few new pics of herself and they all look stunning. For all that's worth, she's a very beautiful, slender, and tall young lady, so under one of the photos, I wrote this comment: "So pretty."

A little while later, she wrote back, "Thank you."

But right away she added, "But my cheeks are chubby."

Mind you, I was already upset at those things I wrote in that previous post - plus I'm having PMS - so the moment I read her second response, I got upset (yeah, PMS mode can be bitchy mode).

Then I wonder why I got upset simply because I read such a response. I think I got upset because I just wanted to shake her and ask, "Are you blind????? Your cheeks aren't chubby at all! Not even close!" (Believe me, anyone on earth who saw the photo would say the same and I'm not being biased here!)

Besides, what does chubby cheeks have to do with beauty? Then I started wondering if there had been people commenting that her cheeks were chubby (Indo people can be that nosy, I tells ya!). Then I got more upset 'coz if that happened, then it meant she believed what they were saying. This had happened to me in the past - I gained a few kgs in Indo, but I was happy in my own skin UNTIL people started telling me, "Oh, you've gotten chubbier these days." And then I started panicking! Sigh...

Then I got upset again 'coz I can feel the topic repeating itself in my own life, in my other female friends' lives...I wonder if men also fuss so much about beauty. I know one sore spot for R2 is the almost bald patch on his head, though I find it cute and it doesn't lessen his sexiness (I love tickling it and then scratching it and hear his sigh of relief he he he...).

It's just that at the end of the day I think to myself: Why are we so hard on ourselves? I know the world pays more attention towards our external self (esp. those who don't know us well), but why is it so hard for us to see our own beauty?

I think I've once written a post where I talked about this topic - about how in Indo I knew I didn't belong to the "beautiful girls" group. I guess it has something to do with age as well - seeking confirmation about yourself from others (read: comparing yourself with others) VERSUS knowing about yourself from within (read: embracing yourself just as who you are at the moment).

Now that I'm getting older, I find that there are days when I just wake up, look at myself in the mirror, and see a beautiful face. Don't get me wrong. On those days when I look at myself in the mirror, I'm NOT comparing myself with anyone (not even with myself in the past). I just see beauty in front of me (in the mirror) just like I see a beautiful flower or a lovely painting or something like that. It does NOT make me feel proud, but it makes me feel good in my own skin, like I belong there. It's like saying to myself: "You're a piece of artwork made by God and I love you."

This doesn't happen every day, but in the past when I was younger, it only happened after I lost some weight or after I put on some make-up and dress myself up or after I reached my weight goal. These days it's not the case anymore and I wonder if any of you has ever felt this way, too? ---> Tell me I'm not crazy!

Ah...I'm rambling...I suppose in the end the small exchange I had with that young lady just evoked the scars I had in the past when I still lived in Indo - where people would comment on my weight and made me feel like I'd done something wrong. And damn me for having succumbed to their words and their standards of external beauty!!! (I know this is easier said than done for those who live in such a pressured environment, but anyway...) OK, I'll just stop here before it gets too long he he...I'll just leave this post with this quote:

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.

- Confucius

MIL's Cows

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 10:18:00 +0000

Before I forget some of the cow stories that MIL told me, I'm gonna write them down here.

MIL and FIL were farmers at one point in their lives. They had plenty of cows, a huge shed, and a big field. MIL told me the other day when she visited me that they named the cows and it got harder and harder to do it.

There was this small cow named Annukka who always kept to herself in the field. She'd munch grass in peace at the corner of the field and when it was time for all the cows to go back inside the shed, she wouldn't even hear a thing. She was so focused on munching and munching and munching and MIL would let her be until the other cows got back inside.

Then she'd go outside and call out, "Annukka...come inside!"

The cow would turn around towards MIL and then she'd look around and upon realizing that the others had gone inside, she'd run as fast as she could into the shed. :-D

MIL also said that when this small cow had a calf, even though she was small in size, she produced so much milk. And she said that normally cows had their young for the first time when they reached 2 years of age. And she always remembered the happy look on her face after she became a mother. She was a good mother, MIL stated. :-D

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One cow managed to produce 12 calves in her lifetime. That meant she lived until she was 14-15 years of age. However, MIL said that these days there's a rather strict law that states that if cows don't produce enough milk after they have their calves for the first time, then they'd be sent right away to the butcher. MIL says that this is a rather bad strategy because some cows only produce the best quality of milk after giving birth three times.

MIL also told me about this one cow named Onneli who (after giving birth) would always moo so loudly when MIL came inside the shed, as if she'd say, "ME FIRST! ME FIRST!!!!". She'd want MIL to milk her first and only after that she'd be willing to start eating he he he he he he...There was also another cow who'd want to eat from her hand while she was being milked.

MIL said that life in the farm was really something else (I bet!!!). Her cows had plenty of calves during the years, but due to the limitations of space, she had to sell those calves. She said if it was up to her, she would want to keep all the calves, too. :-D

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Next time I'll ask her to tell me more about these types of memories. I just LOVE hearing her stories! :-D :-D :-D

3BT: Random Days

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Thu, 29 Mar 2012 15:38:00 +0000

1. Reading this sweet post-it note that hubby left on the inside part of our front door:

2. Just realized it the other day that I'm already halfway down till my retirement age. :-D

3. Having been diligent enough to force myself to keep on translating the Finnish book no matter how hard it is. This story I'm currently translating is definitely tougher than the previous ones!

4. Knowing that my friends and family members are safe despite the demonstrations going on in different cities in Indo due to the fact that the government will raise the prices of gasoline.

5. MIL came for a visit and we had a nice, long talk about many things, including funny stories about her cows. :-D

6. She could even explain to me one particular word that nobody else knew (I had asked around to other Finnish people in Facebook) hat I found in the book I had to translate. YEAHHHH!!!!

Temple Grandin: Movie Recommendation

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Wed, 28 Mar 2012 14:45:00 +0000

Last night I finally got the chance to watch "Temple Grandin". Had been dying to watch it ever since I accidentally saw it in imdb a while back he he...

I HIGHLY recommend the movie. It's now officially one of my fave movies of all time. Claire Danes did a BRILLIANT job on becoming Temple Grandin. I hardly recognized her at all. Even Temple Grandin herself had stated that she was very pleased with Claire Danes' portrayal of herself.

The movie is brilliant in many ways, especially in taking me to view the world through a highly functional autistic woman's eyes. Here's a quote from the movie:

I know I was different, but NOT less!

Anyway, here's the trailer:

And if you're interested in watching this long video clip of the real Temple Grandin (the speech starts at 6:20 if you want to skip the introduction), here goes:

Finnish-English Translation Update

noreply@blogger.com (Amel) — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 12:00:00 +0000

During the week when I was not feeling very well, I got lazy and I didn't do any translation at all, but now I've started focusing on it again. I must say that it's a really challenging task. There are just some things that sound natural in Finnish and the English translation of it would sound a bit weird. Plus in Finnish you can write such a loooooonnnngggg sentence that just can't be translated into English without my chopping them up into at least two sentences.

I haven't been translating long texts in a LONG time, so my translation brain is kinda rusty. Oftentimes I get stuck because I have the image of the word in my head, but I can't bring myself to remember the word. It feels frustrating to be able to view the image in your mind without being able to voice it.

Another challenge for me is the vocabulary (obviously). The main character goes fishing and some fishing gears are mentioned along with names of fishes or animals that I don't know 'coz they don't exist in Indonesia. THANK GOD there's Google and free online dictionaries. Otherwise I wouldn't have survived (so far I've only translated 3 stories). *GRIN*

The writer also has a certain style of writing that I'm not familiar with. After all, most of the time I've been reading translated novels (English to Finnish), so I haven't got too much experience reading novels written by Finnish writers (I did start reading Puhdistus by Sofi Oksanen, but then as usual*** I switched book in the middle - my bad!!! But I shall get back to that book someday he he...).

*** Confession: I'm not really a "good reader". I do LOVE collecting books, but I switch books A LOT while reading them. There are only a few novels (among all the novels I've read in my lifetime) that I read without switching and stopping in between. And yeah, that meant that lots of time I had to reread the books I had left behind from the beginning again ha ha ha ha ha...

P.S. I'd love to recommend Terry Pratchett's "Going Postal". It's VERY FUNNY and I LOVE all the characters. For some reason I enjoy this one better than Pratchett's Colour of Magic. Here's the trailer: