Amy Bayliss

What's a girl to do?

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:25:00 +0000

A while back I posted about wanting a baby sling. When I was pregnant with my boys - eh um, more than 8 years ago - I wasn't a savvy, internet surfing mommy who was able to discover such things. My knowledge of baby care products was limited to what I saw in Wal-Mart. 'nuff said

But now, eight years later, I see all of these amazing things that would make everything so great. The idea of having my baby with me most of the time and having my hands virtually free was something I just had to go for. How else would I type and hold baby, hmmm?

So my good friend Karin heard my plea and sent me a box full (like 8 full) of slings in all styles, patterns, and oh my word, degrees of fashion and convenience. I love it! It was like Christmas in October when I opened the box.

She also sent me a totally brand new double breast pump. Can I tell you I seriously prayed for that? I knew I needed one because unfortunately my last two papooses developed jaundice because they just didn't get enough milk so the doctor had me pump and measure for every feeding. That was with a single, manual pump. All I did was pump. For six months I pumped, drank water, fed baby, drank water, changed diapers, drank water, took vitamins drank water, fed baby, pumped again... you get the idea. This pump got rave reviews and I'm quite sure it will give me some peace of mind when the little one gets here.

Just look at all that love she sent me... thanks, K!

Well the point of my rambling is that I've also discovered something else and I really would like some opinions about it. You know we are trying to save money and I'm a somewhat "green" or "organic" or "natural" mommy, however you want to put it. I'm just sort of mediocre in that area but I think I'm in awe of the concept of cloth diapering. Who knew there was more out there than Gerber white, rectangular, tri-folds with massive ducky safety pins?

I've discovered the cute, the fabulous, and the wow aka FuzzyBuns, bumGenius, and even Happy Heinys! I know it would save room in landfills and I know it would be easier on Baby Bayliss's buns but is it really that much cheaper? Is it really worth the extra effort?

I'm asking because I would hate for us to invest in this and then find it is not as wonderful as I think it is. I just can't imagine them not leaking, or not mildewing while in the bag for two days, or well.. you see what I'm saying.

Help a sista out... tell me about cloth diapering. Is it the way to go?

Radio Show & Discounts Galore!

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 16:08:00 +0000

A while back I received an email from an eager and excited Noelle about a new project she was working on with Lori Kasbeer. Noelle has founded a new resource for Christian women called "Christian Women Affiliate." CWA will have weekly radio shows through Blog Talk Radio and I am one of the hosts.

Yep, she gave me my own show.

No. I have no clue what she was thinking but I am excited to be able to participate and I do hope that you will join me. I'll be on every Thursday at 1pm CST. You can listen here: CWA Blog Talk Radio or call in: 347.850.8893. You can chat while listening and even call in to ask questions.

I'm focusing solely on issues related to women. That pretty much means that everything goes! :)

I'm not coming from this with a psychological, philosophical, or any of those kinds of ways but instead I am going to go to the bible for answers then we'll open up the topic for discussion. It will kind of be like a bible study each week broadcast live on radio. Sweet, huh? So what do you want to know about? What questions do you have? Give me some more ideas so that I can start digging into the word for answers. CWA Radio has shows seven days a week so you can be sure to find something that interests you. Check it out!

Oh and I have a bunch of coupons for some great stores and I won't be able to use them so if you can and you want them then just let me know and I can either email you the discount code or mail you the actual coupon for use in store. It is first come first serve so I only ask that if you request them that you be sure you can use them. Last time I did this I had tons of requests and so if you aren't sure you can use them I know someone can.

So here is what I have:

J.Jill $25 off purchase of $100 (online coupon) expires November 15
Eddie Bauer 15% off purchase (online coupon) expires November 15
Kohl's 15% off everything plus $10 cash for every $50 spent (online coupon) expires November 15
(2) Coldwater Creek $30 off purchase of $100 or more (online or in store) expires November 30
The Children's Place 15% off next purchase (online coupon) expires November 17
Bath and Body Works $10 off purchase of $30 or more plus free shipping if online purchase (online or in store) expires November 29
Gymboree $20 off purchase of $75 or more (online or in store) expires November 25
Gymboree 20% off entire purchase (online or in store) expires November 25
(2) Gymboree 15% off entire purchase (in store) expires December 24

This code is for everyone:

Gymboree 15% off entire purchase (online) use code: 111F3V9UV080247 (expires December 24)

So let me know if you would like them and be sure to listen in on the radio show today!

He absolutely does provide!

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 20:40:00 +0000

I've been awfully frustrated lately with the state of our current economy and just our state's overall condition. I've spent days helping my brother look for employment. There is nothing. A man can serve his country overseas and come home and have no income. I just thank God that he does not have a family yet. That would be unthinkable.

I absolutely have faith in God's promises but I'd be lying if I said I always had a peaceful content spirit about me when it comes to finances and needs. The truth is I throw lots of fits. I do that when I am not in control of something. It is like a natural reaction. Thankfully, God teaches us the principles to change those natural sin reactions and gives us the Holy Spirit to encourage us to make Godly choices. I have had to make those quite often lately.

One of the main prayers I pray is for God to just change my mindset. I may not want to think this way or do things in another way but I ask Him to change my heart about it. He absolutely does.

Just this past Sunday in church we had to sit in the back because we were running a bit late. We usually sit in the front so I can hear better but for some strange reason I was okay with not sitting in "our" seat. After worship was over we are usually asked to greet one another and that usually puts me in a tizzy. I have no idea why but I am just not comfortable with this practice. I always feel weird like I am being forced to be nice or something. Idk. I make no excuses. I have no idea where this pattern of thought comes from but I did ask God to change my heart this Sunday.

When announcements were done and the pastor asked us to turn around and greet one another I did not even hesitate. I can't explain it. One or two people even tried to pretend they didn't see me wanting to greet them but I did it anyway. Then there was this sweet little couple that seemed overly excited to have me tell them good morning. It did my heart good.

I sat down so content and happy that God had given me the grace to do that. I immediately thanked Him and prepared my notebook for the message that was about to be delivered. That is when she tapped me on the shoulder.

This sweet, older lady that had been so happy for me to say good morning to her put some cash in my hand and said, "this is for the baby." I was dumbfounded. I turned to thank her and she just smiled and said, "shhh!" and started to read in her bible. I'd never had this happen before. I didn't know what to think. I went to show my husband and that is when we noticed that it was a $50 bill. Wow. Okay, Lord. I get it. I really do. I hope.

I was so thankful for that. Then the whole message was about how the Lord provides exactly what we need each and every day and how we shouldn't worry about it. Worrying is the devil's way of stealing time away from us. We can't worry about what might not ever happen and even if it does happen the worrying can't change it.

With that I went home and thanked the Lord for all that He has provided us with. He even gave me a new way to look at coupon/sale shopping!

I used to see it as tedious. I would do it but I wasn't excited about it so I prayed for a change of heart. If I needed to do it then I could at least be content with it. He changed my heart. I began to see it just like I do that one shopping day of the year that I love: Black Friday. My sister and I scour the ads looking for great deals. It is like winning the lottery when you find things that have been on your "one day" list and can purchase them for just a fraction of the cost.

Now I see every Saturday as my "Black Saturday". I scour the ads and coupons just looking for stuff we use and only pay a fraction of the cost. Why pay full price when they will give it to your for 70% off? It is such a joy now!

My challenge is to spend less than $75 a week on groceries including toiletries and cleaning supplies. I hear other people do it on $40 a week but we have no stores here that double coupons and there are no Aldi's or Kroeger's here so I have to deal with what we are provided with. So far I have been able to shop each week for less than $75.

I haven't been to CVS in a while because we didn't have one nearby but that all changed a few months ago. A CVS opened up just right down the road and so I decided to start saving once again using their method. For those of you who aren't sure how the CVS method works check out these sites: The Thrifty Mom and Money Saving Mom. There are also many more links to money saving blogs in my sidebar feed.

Here is my first trip to CVS. I got everything pictured here for $42.59 and have $7 in Extra Care Bucks to use towards my next purchase. In addition to shopping for only what was on sale I used coupons that totaled $32.66! I would have had to buy this stuff in the near future anyway so by buying it a few weeks early I put more than $32.66 back in our pocket!

I'm excited about this stuff now! I can't stop looking for resources.

I also shopped a great sale at Albertson's this week. You get $10 back by spending $30 on Proctor and Gamble products. I bought two of the 60 roll packs of toilet paper at $15.95 each and used two coupons for $2.00 off so I saved a total of $14 on these items that we use everyday, many times a day. We should not have to buy more until next year! :)

While I was there I picked up a couple more things that were on sale and that I had a coupon for. I only buy what I know we will use. I saved more than I spent and that makes me happy!

I thank God that He changes our hearts when we ask Him to. This may be minor to some people but this is such a big deal for me. I'm actually excited about it!

Free "City Girls" Template

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 18:29:00 +0000

This is a Blogger template that is fully customizable using the "fonts and colors" option and the header is customizable by using the free program, Paint.net. Remember, if you continue to try to design your own blog but don't get the professional results you are looking for, just visit my design website: Split Decisionz and then send me an email. I can help!

As with all changes to your blogger template, please be sure to back up a copy of your current template prior to uploading a new one. Also, be sure to make backup copies of all of your blogger widgets. Copying and pasting them into a notepad or word document is sufficient. Be sure to name the files accordingly so that they are easy to find later. I actually suggest using a practice blog before installing it on your actual blog. Follow directions completely.

If you use this template, I ask as a courtesy, please place a link to AmyBayliss.com or place the button on your blog in the sidebar. Though these items are free to you they do cost me money to host, purchase graphics, and also lots of time and effort. Appreciation is always good! :)

Download template file
Get Copy of .png Header to Upload (can be edited with paint.net)

The font used in the header is: Pea Stacy Tunibug

Using Internet Explorer, download this file to your computer. (You must right click and "save target as". Copying and pasting will not work.)
Find the file and rename with the .xml extension. (ex. citygirls.txt should be renamed citygirls.xml)
Sign into your Blogger profile.
Click on "layout"
Click on "edit html"
Using the template upload feature, browse for saved template file.
Click Upload.
Tweak as necessary!

Don't miss a single template or tip. Sign up to receive updates in your inbox.

How To Get Your Own Domain Name

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 16:37:00 +0000

There are many reasons why you might want to get your own domain. The first reasons that come to mind are personalization and professionalism. It also makes it easier for your readers to remember your URL and find you again, just in case they forgot to bookmark you.

When choosing a domain name remember to google the name first to be sure that no one else has a similar name. Try to be as unique as possible. It is easy to confuse URLs that are similar.

Google allows you to purchase your domain directly through them and it only costs $10 per year.

Log into your blogger account.
From your dashboard click on “settings”.
Next, click the “publishing” tab.
Under “Advanced Settings” it says, Need a domain? Buy one now” Click “Buy one now.”
This will now walk you through the process of purchasing your domain and in three to four days it will be active.

So what is your new domain name? I'd like to know!

Because we need fun stuff to do...

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 13:53:00 +0000

I was over at She Reads and saw a post that gave me a great idea...

The post says, "Whenever I visit someone’s home (or office), I always peek at their bookshelf. You can tell a lot about a person by the type of books they read."

I thought it would be fun for me to post some of the books that I am currently reading and see what you can decipher from them and leave a comment stating what "type of person" you think I am because of those books.

Let's make it fun! The more witty and hilarious the better. If you want to play and have me -and others- decipher you too then leave me the link in the comments.

So here is what I am reading:

Now, what in the world does that say about me?

Great thrift store finds and baby update!

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 20:59:00 +0000

I just love Jen’s Frugal Fashionista posts over at Beauty and Bedlam. I’ll admit that shopping for clothing at the thrift store is something new for me. I am just so used to shopping via magazines, online, and other stores that sell clothing new. Maybe it is because of my clothes shopping phobia that I’ve never looked for clothes at the thrift store? Probably.

In any case, Jen really encouraged me and gave me some great tips on how to look for great pieces. Her posts on the topic are really helpful and I put them to the test.

Last week my mom-in-love and I went shopping. I did not have any luck at our local Good-Will stores and their prices were a bit much for the quality of the items so I was getting a bit irritated but then we went to the American Thrift Store. I promise angels were singing from the moment we walked in. Racks of beautifully organized clothing hung by size (yeah, GoodWill take notes) and the prices were wonderful! I bought three maternity tops and 2 pairs of maternity jeans for 16.25! The best part is that they looked like they had hardly been used! Oh was I ever excited. I even took pictures for you:

Not bad, huh? Gosh, I need a haircut.

Anyway, I saw my OB this week too and he says all is well. I have only gained 3lbs since I found out I was pregnant. That is hard for me to believe. The baby’s heartbeat is a bit over 160 beats per minute which he said is “girl range” but he also said not to hold him to it. I won’t. Brennan’s heart rate was always in the high 150s and I don’t think it slowed any after he was born. He is still like the energizer bunny. We will have a sonogram next visit so we shall see if it is a “she” or a “he” then! Anybody want to take a guess at the sex of the baby? :)

Free Christmas Blogger Template

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 15:20:00 +0000

This is a Blogger template that is fully customizable using the "fonts and colors" option and the header is customizable by layer using the free program, Paint.net. Remember, if you continue to try to design your own blog but don't get the professional results you are looking for, just visit this page: Blog Design and Consultation Services and then send me an email. I can help!

As with all changes to your blogger template, please be sure to back up a copy of your current template prior to uploading a new one. Also, be sure to make backup copies of all of your blogger widgets. Copying and pasting them into a notepad or word document is sufficient. Be sure to name the files accordingly so that they are easy to find later. I actually suggest using a practice blog before installing it on your actual blog. Follow directions completely.

Download template file
Get Copy of .png Header to Upload

Get Copy of .pdn Header to Upload (can be edited with paint.net)

If you use paint.net to alter the header file, you will see the layers with information like this: Pegsanna HMK 36 #70E0E0. That lists the font style, font size, and font color.

Using Internet Explorer, download this file to your computer. (You must right click and "save target as". Copying and pasting will not work.)
Sign into your Blogger profile.
Click on "layout"
Click on "edit html"
Using the template upload feature, browse for saved template file.
Click Upload.
Tweak as necessary!

Don't miss a single template or tip. Sign up to receive updates in your inbox.

Free"Pinching Pennies" Template

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 15:10:00 +0000

As with all changes to your blogger template, please be sure to back up a copy of your current template prior to uploading a new one. Also, be sure to make backup copies of all of your blogger widgets. Copying and pasting them into a notepad or word document is sufficient. Be sure to name the files accordingly so that they are easy to find later. I actually suggest using a practice blog before installing it on your actual blog. Follow directions completely.

Download template file
Get Copy of .png Header to Upload

(can be edited with paint.net)

Using Internet Explorer, download this file to your computer. (You must right click and "save target as". Copying and pasting will not work.)
Sign into your Blogger profile.
Click on "layout"
Click on "edit html"
Using the template upload feature, browse for saved template file.
Click Upload.
Tweak as necessary!

Don't miss a single template or tip. Sign up to receive updates in your inbox.

Free "Scrap Style" Template

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 13:09:00 +0000

As with all changes to your blogger template, please be sure to back up a copy of your current template prior to uploading a new one. Also, be sure to make backup copies of all of your blogger widgets. Copying and pasting them into a notepad or word document is sufficient. Be sure to name the files accordingly so that they are easy to find later. I actually suggest using a practice blog before installing it on your actual blog. Follow directions completely.

Download template file
Get Copy of .png Header to Upload

Get Copy of .pdn Header to Upload (can be edited with paint.net)

If you use paint.net to alter the header file, you will see the layers with information like this: Pegsanna HMK 36 #70E0E0. That lists the font style, font size, and font color.

Using Internet Explorer, download this file to your computer. (You must right click and "save target as". Copying and pasting will not work.)
Sign into your Blogger profile.
Click on "layout"
Click on "edit html"
Using the template upload feature, browse for saved template file.
Click Upload.
Tweak as necessary!

Don't miss a single template or tip. Sign up to receive updates in your inbox.

Kids just don't understand about money...

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 16:14:00 +0000

"Mom, can you buy me a watch like this?"

"Mom, I want a four-wheeler for my birthday."

"Mom! You never buy us anything!"

Am I the only one who hears things like this around the house? Please say it isn't so.

I really was so frustrated with the thought processes our boys had concerning money that I was about to just snap. I mean, they thought I could whip out the debit card for any and everything their little hearts desired and that was that. Money had absolutely no value to them. That is not a good mindset in this day and age when so many are suffering financially. I want our kids to handle their finances better than the current "buy now - pay later" generation that is greatly suffering today.

So, I had an idea...

It all started with Gevan's economics work. I remember looking at the textbook and thinking that he can't possibly understand any of this without a proper revelation of the value of money. So I came up with a way to show him.

I used this form, Value of Money, to initiate this process. When we first started he loved being able to write down all of the things that he wanted to buy but as he got further into the assignment he began to realize some things about money. When he had to figure out how many weeks he'd have to work (chores, jobs at grandmas, etc) to earn enough to purchase certain things then it began to click. He also figured out really quickly what the difference is between a need and a want. He even started to do something I never dreamed he would do... he saved some!

Now I will admit the saving thing was short lived but he does have more in-depth knowledge of the value of money.

Some other things we've done is always make them use their cash at the register. That way they have to have the exact amount and they figure out quickly about how Uncle Sam gets his cut. I've also followed some advice that I heard at the Heart of the Matter online conference this year by Carol Topp. She said that if your kids don't realize the expenses that come out of your paycheck each month then you can use play money to show them. Simply count out the amount of your paycheck and then, with the kids watching, deduct from it the expenses your family has each month. That way they can see for themselves where the money goes.

What about your kiddos?

What is it that they say about lemons?

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 17:08:00 +0000

Recently, we lost over 1/3 of our income (no more child support). That is quite a blow. Thankfully we have no debt other than the house but things are still really tight, only $50 a week for groceries tight. With no stores that double coupons, no Kroger's and a desperate need for a second vehicle, my husband and I had to sit down and make some decisions.

We are first of all completely thankful to be out of debt. There is no way we could have fathomed making it otherwise. We cut out all unnecessary expenses, dropped a phone line, went down to the cheapest cell phone plan, cutting coupons, you name it. We are doing it more diligently than were were before. We know things will be rough for a while but God has always provided and I know He always will. He reminds me of that often:

Yes, He made sure my name was on Johevah-Jireh in the prayer room at She Speaks. I had no idea at that time that we were expecting and I also couldn't foresee the financial issues that would arise. But He knew...

With these things in mind we decided that I needed to generate an income again: the steady kind. Ministry is always going to be the forefront but until we hear God tell us otherwise then we are going to keep walking and doing what we can to generate some funds as well. This may only be for a month or two or it could be for a year. I don't know.

I started listing items on eBay again: id SplitDecisionz and also on Amazon: id SplitDecisionzBooks. I am currently selling some items for a friend but I will be listing lots more in the upcoming weeks so please keep checking. I will also start taking orders for blogger designs again and do some consulting. I will only be taking enough orders to fulfill our current need so it will be first come, first serve. If you are interested in those services please visit this page: Blog Design and Consultation, and then contact me at inquiry (at) amybayliss (dot) com.

If you don't need anything then would you please spread the word and say a prayer or two for my family? That would mean a lot to us! Thanks!

Too many spiritually immature Christians?

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 12:41:00 +0000

I think at one time or another we have all looked and someone else and thought that we were more spiritually mature than that person. I know I've done it. ...too many times. But then I usually sense God speaking to my spirit and saying that we are not all on the same scope of learning and that we each have our area of difficulty. Of course, I usually huff and puff because I know He's right and then I repent.

Something else that I have dealt with is that I have found too many people saying, myself included, things like, "well that wasn't the Christian thing to do."

Oh mercy.

Where do we get this stuff from? Is it our uncontrollable urge to feel better than others? Is it simply our judgmental angst? Perhaps we just don't know what in the world we are really talking about. I think that's it.

Maybe we should change that.

I have an assignment for you. It's simple. Define "spiritual maturity" and tell me what makes a person a Christian. You can answer either or both but I really want to see what God reveals to us through this. Make sure you ask Him to speak to your heart and give you some revelation about it. This is an area that, in my opinion, we girls really need to overcome. It's hard to unite as one cohesive unit (the body of Christ) when we all think we are a more key player than most of the others we are uniting with.

Tell me what God speaks to your heart...

I love this time of year!

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 12:28:00 +0000

"Let them once get in touch with nature and a habit is formed which will be a source of delight and habit through life."
Charlotte Mason

What is co-schooling?

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 12:06:00 +0000

I heard this term a while back when my sister was debating on whether or not to homeschool her kids. She is currently in college pursuing her degree in elementary education and wasn't very confident that she could pull off homeschooling and college. Her concerns prompted us to do some research and that is when we discovered "co-schooling".

Co-schooling is another form of home education that works in partnership with the school the child attends. The premise for this method is that the parents are the absolute authority over the child's education and they work closely with the child's teachers to give the student the best education possible. Without open communication and a desire to teach and train your child this method will not work. The point is to not leave the bulk of the responsibility up to the school but instead take some of that responsibility upon yourself.

Become acquainted. Get to know your child's teacher and help her or him get to know your child. This is a team effort and all great teams require strategic planning.
Communicate. Set up meetings or phone calls all throughout the year so that you can each get a glimpse of the child's progress and needs.
Plan and Prepare. Ask for lesson plans and homework schedules so that you can supplement the education they are receiving in the classroom with appropriate materials at home: books, games, trips, TV shows, etc. The homework schedule allows you to monitor the child's work and see how they are doing in regards to mastering concepts. It also helps you to keep them accountable.
Learning Environment. Give each child a space for doing homework in peace. Make sure there is lots of light, pens, paper, and any other necessary supplies within reach.
Set Goals. Talk with your child and help them to set goals for each school year and then break them down by semester. Review them every so often to make sure the child always has that goal in view. It is easier for them to walk towards success if they have a plan for doing so.
Volunteer. It makes you a part of your child's world away from home. You can get to know those who engage and encourage your child each day and become a part of the process instead of just being a spectator.
Know your rights. Educate yourself on the laws and rules that govern your child's school. Find out whom you are to speak to if there is a problem. Find out what the school's responsibilities are and then make sure you understand your own responsibilities.

Above all, know that you are the parent and that the child's teacher and other administrators are there to help you educate your child. Don't take a backseat to the system. Unfortunately, the majority of parents of school age children have just handed over their children to the schools and because of this those children are educated under a broad spectrum. Without an advocate, your child's teacher has to guess as to his or her abilities and they have to discipline and train without your input or support. This is not what was intended and this is not being a good parent.

Even if the only thing that you can do is email or call then do it. No one knows or loves your child more than you and no one else should be more involved in their education than you.

What about you? Do any of you have tips or advice on how to effectively co-school our children. Any teachers want to weigh in?

Untypically Jia Online Ministry Review

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 13:30:00 +0000

Today we are reviewing Jia's blog, Untypically Jia.

Jia's online ministry offers multiple posts during the week, lots of photos, and regular entries to the Daily Gratitudes meme. At first glance I am drawn in by how soothing it is. She has a fine writing style and updates regularly. You will really feel as though you know Jia after you spend some time around her blog.

In reference to the basics:

What is your ministry about? I can tell immediately that this is about enjoying life amidst whatever circumstances you are given.
Is your site easy to navigate? I found the navigation tabs to be helpful and the labeling was done well. There is nothing worse than fifty labels for one blog. Jia only has a few and they were precise and informative.
Is your design eye catching yet soothing? I really like Jia's design. It is soothing and feminine but yet, it still has some edge to it. The only suggestion I could make here is to bring in at least one other color to give the design some "pop" or the wow factor. That would put it over the top!
Do I know how to contact you? Yes, Jia did give me a way to contact her (contact tab in the navigation) and I can also see how to find her via Facebook and Twitter as well.
Is your content alluring and biblically sound? I find Jia's content to be very alluring. She speaks the truth in love and is honest about her situation all the while giving God the glory for the changes in her heart. Jia's beliefs are clearly defined and I appreciate that. While I am not Mormon, I do know that they also use the same bible we use and the biblical scripture quoted on her site was found to be sound.
Are you providing the necessary services to encourage long term readership? I quickly located her "follow" widget, feed buttons and was even given the opportunity to given links to where else on the web that I could find her. She also has a 125px by 125px button for me to share.
Do you have an "about me" section or page? Jia's testimony is really gave me insight into who she is and whatshe desires out of life. She loves her pups and her hubby is her one true love. She told me all about her struggles and how she overcame. It gives her great authority in areas that need more advocates.

Things that I loved:

Jia uses lots of pictures. Most of them are personal but she also uses stock photos for other posts. That is such a helpful visual for readers. I enjoy blogs more if they have photos than if they don't. Great job!
In her sidebar she links to a site that clearly defines her beliefs. This is so helpful. Not only for those seeking to know more about her faith but also for those who may be unfamiliar with or misguided about their beliefs. This way you can view it for yourself!
I love the scrolling marquee of ministry buttons that is located at the bottom of her sidebar. This is a great feature because it allows her to display the buttons without cluttering her sidebars which can be quite distracting.
She has an FAQs page linked in her navigation bar with questions that others may have. Not only does this give me a greater glimpse in Jia's world but it also prevents me from emailing her a question that she may have gotten ten times already this week!
The message against drunk driving is an absolute winner for me! Kudos for that one! btw... read the story behind the button. Her mother was such a beautiful woman taken by tragic circumstances. We should all do our part to prevent things like this from happening.
She has a music player but it does not start automatically when I open the page. YAY!!

Some areas that could benefit from a bit of a change:

I would prefer to see a bit more color throughout the blog design. It is very good as it is but I do believe it could be even better with more oomph!
I didn't see too many invitations for comments. Asking questions, seeking opinions, or just plain ol' saying, "leave me a comment" encourages our readers to communicate and leaves them feeling like part of the community - like they matter. I know they appreciate that.

Overall Jia is an amazing woman with a heart for helping others heal. That clearly shows through her writing and her blog. Be sure to go and pay her a visit!

What do you think of Jia's online ministry?

How honest should you be?

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:22:00 +0000

I often have others tell me that they could never blog or reveal private thoughts, moments, or life experiences to a bunch of strangers. They don't understand how I can write "so freely" to people I may have never met or to people that I may not know are actually reading. There really is a method to how I decide what I should or shouldn't write.

Certain things are absolutely off limits: my husband's job, family member's personal issues, other people's children, and our small church groups. I generalize about these things but never give details because we are entrusted with certain information and have to remain true to our promise to protect that information.

When it comes to events in our lives like summer camp, vacation, sporting events and such then I always wait until days or even weeks later to post about them. I do this because I don't want some stranger (one that I don't know is reading) to know that my 8-year-old is at summer camp with blah-blah church and got on bus number XYZ on his way to your town, my state. So, I take photos, write the post and then save the draft for a later time when I know it is safe to post about. Which would typically be long after said child has returned from camp - safe and sound. I also don't post information about my kid's co-ops, schools or teams. I think it is too easy to obtain information about those things from websites and I want to do my part to protect them.

There are some events that I post about immediately. Gevan receiving a scholarship to the LPA conference and the boys' baptism were two such events. That was something I wanted others to be able to celebrate with us about and we have lots of family who read my blog to keep up with the daily grind in our lives so I want them to see things like that. There is simply no reason not to post something like that. It is a time of rejoicing!

As far as information about my marriage, my children's struggles, our financial situation, or my divorce... those are things that are only talked about once I feel God prompts me to. I don't think there is any reason to post something that isn't beneficial to someone else and the only way I have found to determine what is and what isn't is to let the Him prompt me. There are many, many things pertaining to my divorce that I have never spoken of. There are things happening now with their father that I wouldn't dare speak of until I felt a release from the Lord. For now, it is to be handled between my husband and I and the boys' dad. If I didn't wait then this would all be about me, not Him. I've actually learned that He has to have the glory for every word I write or else it really is in vain. If I want to view my blog as a ministry then ALL OF IT must be ABOUT HIM.

I know lots of people use cutesie little names for their kids instead of their real names and that is fine. I don't use my boys' last name and so I feel it is okay to use their first names. Truth be told, anyone who knows a thing or two about the Internet and how to search can find out things like that. It isn't very hard. But, we all need to do what we feel is best for our family. I still have no idea what I'll do about this baby. I may very well use a cutesie little name because obviously the last name will be known. I don't know yet. We'll see.

So what do you think of all of this. How honest are you and what precautions do you take to protect your family? What are your boundaries for writing online?

Girlfriend! Don't Eat the Cake!

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 12:54:00 +0000

For a couple of years now I have been on this health kick. We have been taught over and over again that we must watch what we eat. The bad stuff may taste ever so sweet when you’re savoring it on your tongue but when you are carrying that weight around afterwards it just doesn’t seem worth it, does it?

Well, on Saturday my sister and I went shopping at the health foods store. I had a simple list: bread, chocolate milk, honey, chicken, and pineapple. Yes, chocolate milk. A girl has to have her daily intake of calcium and flavanoids. I’m sure I read that somewhere. So we perused through the store admiring the organic, non-harmful nail polish and body lotion all the while gathering my groceries. I even brought my reusable grocery totes to enhance the experience. There were goodies everywhere and the word "organic" seemed to make the calories disappear but I knew better. We were almost done browsing and shopping when we got to the bakery department and I turned around and noticed my sister was missing. Knowing someone wouldn't mistake her for a dessert...

To read the rest of this post please join me for a cup of coffee over at the Cafe!

Real "on the job" Training

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 14:25:00 +0000

My multi-talented husband is a computer/game system repair person aside from his day job and well, Gevan just loves to sit and watch dad tinker with the electronics. He finally asked dad the question we had been waiting for,"Dad, can you teach me how to fix this one?"

*all smiles*

Of course dad didn't mind and Gevan was quite successful at his first attempt. He got this one working on the first try thanks to the great lessons he received. Afterwards he asked the question we weren't waiting to hear, "So... how much do I get paid?"

Way to go, Gevan!

Top 10 Tips from a Veteran Publisher - She Speaks Recap

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 13:31:00 +0000

Sandy Vander Zicht from Zondervan was the guest speaker for this session. Can I tell you that I learned sooooo much in one hour that it has taken me all this time to truly absorb it? It was good stuff. That's all I can say.

Lucky for you I'm sharing...

On Writing:

1. Write like you talk. Things to avoid:

writing like a teacher (dictating, dry)
writing like a preacher (bullying, fire and brimstone)
writing like a dead person (don't' write to a bygone era)

When Sandy discussed these things there was laughter and a bit of shock in the room. Most of us at one time or another have actually done these things. Don't get me wrong, there is a time and a place for these writings but it typically isn't in a published book and it definitely isn't for those seeking a book deal.

Your writing must reflect your personality. The reader wants to connect with you and that can only be done if your book is written in a conversational tone. Remember those old dry text books from school? You may have learned about the Spartans but did you really connect with these infamous military men? Did you feel like you had been taken on a trip to ancient Greece? Not likely. That is the difference between dry facts and living literature. Putting your personality into the writing creates an adventure that takes you to that place. It gives you something solid to grasp and help you to understand.

The old preachy preach books. Hmmph. The book is not your pulpit and your readers are not your congregation. Let me see a show of hands. How many of you would like to read a book that tears you down to nothing, tells you how worthless and invaluable you are, and how you can never get it right? Then, does it benefit you in any way for the writer to try to remedy the situation by quoting a bunch of scripture that doesn't seem to fit with any of the problems that you have identified in your life?

I don't think so. That doesn't mean that someone won't try to write that book though.

There is a way to speak the biblical truth without condemning and belittling people. The best way is by showing them, through testimony, that sin can be overcome. It takes on a whole new perspective when someone admits that they have fallen into a trap that led to sin and then shares a biblical perspective on how God brought them out of it. That does more that just a bunch of dictating dos and don'ts with consequences. If that method worked then we wouldn't have need for the bible. It is full of testimonies that help to build our faith, encourage us, and it shares God's love for us imperfect servants.

John 19:35, Revelation 12:11 and many others teach us the importance of sharing our testimony.

I never would have thought that people would write like dead people but come to think of it, I've read (or tried to read) a couple that may have been written by dead people. Books that seem to be written to women by women who lived in the 1800s is rampant. There were many great books that came from that era and unfortunately, too many women are trying to duplicate them. You are not CS Lewis. You are not the apostle Paul. You are not Corrie Ten Boom or Mother Theresa. Just be you and write to your audience.

She also mentioned that you should not use words that you would not normally use in conversation. It doesn't make you appear smarter. It makes your reader feel ignorant.

2. Don't write like you talk.

Edit out filler language.
Allow your book to breathe.
Get to the point.

Filler language buys time until the person speaking can formulate another complete thought. Books aren't on a clock so there is no need for "praise God" and "know what I mean" to be present throughout a book manuscript. Edit it out.

Make sure you use short, easy to read paragraphs and use subtitles to mark a shift in thoughts. This helps ease the reader into the fresh material. It also makes it easier for them to mark a place and to find it again later.

As far as getting to the point, Sandy stressed that the reader shouldn't have to guess at what you are thinking or where this road is leading. In other words, if you drag the person on, paragraph after paragraph, then you will lose their interest.

3. Rewrite, Rewrite, Rewrite

Read your book.
Get objective opinions.
Let the book rest.
Eliminate unnecessary words.

The best thing you can do for your readers is to become one. Read each sentence aloud and preferably to someone else so that you can truly experience what your reader will experience. It was mentioned that Max Lucado reads his books over and over aloud to his agent before the book ever leaves his hands. He writes, reads aloud, fixes mistakes, reads aloud again, etc.

CS Lewis is quoted as saying that we should write with our ears and not our eyes. That is some good advice if you ask me!

She also mentioned that you should send your chapters to objective readers. That means don't send it to your mom, or your husband. Don't give it to your daughter or your best friend. You need an honest objective review. Your readers deserve that.

Another great tip was to let your book rest. Just walk away from it for a while then go back and read it. You won't believe what you can notice days later with that fresh pair of eyes.

When you do go back over your script be sure to do some weeding. Take out all of the filler words, the redundant sentences, the bad metaphors, etc.

4. Show, Don't Tell
This was probably the most profound point for me. She read a sample from a book proposal that she had received and it was dry, lifeless and well, just a bunch of statements. Then she read the reworked version for us. It came to life. You experienced it. You were really taken on a journey with her. You could feel the emotion of tucking in the children alone; smell the musk of bamboo; see the clock ticking away minute by minute; and hear the chirp of crickets outside the window while she wrestled with God over what He told her to do. We wanted to hear more and that is what works. That is what sells because it engages the reader.

You must write in real time and from your perspective.

5. Read, Read, Read
Real lots of books. Whether good or bad, books give you an idea of what works and what doesn't.

That is all for now. Part two is on publishing and yes, I have many more notes from this session so I will post those in a couple of days. :)

Eating me out of house and home?

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 13:41:00 +0000

I've never understood that saying. I mean, how can someone eat you out of house and home? Anyway, one issue that I have always had is the inability to purchase enough food for growing boys. They wake up and they want to eat. They come home from school and they want to eat. Before they go to bed they want to eat. That is just way too much eating going on and can you imagine the cost?

We won't go there.

Where we will go is to the refrigerator where I now have a snack bin. It consists of enough snacks for each child for the week. I prepare it on Sunday and organize it so that it is effective. That means each child gets the same number of carrots and crackers. You know they count them. You know they do.

I start by making a simple list of what snacks will go together. Then I assign the groups a number. This is so that the kids know what snacks go together just in case they don’t all fit in a baggy. They receive enough snacks per day that will allow them to have something at least four times but they can eat it all at one sitting if they choose. They just don’t get any additional snacks for the day if they do that. Here is a sample list that we use:

peanut butter and jelly sandwich / banana
two cups of popcorn (have you noticed that the shaker pans are back? so 80s!) / 3 small pickles
triscuits / beef sticks / cheese stick / pudding
grilled cheese sandwich / apple slices
corn dog / yogurt
pizza rolls / carrots / granola bar
tortillas with cheese / boiled peanuts / trail mix

Each group of snacks goes into a baggy and is then marked with the appropriate number. I also put each child’s initials on a bag so that they only get one of that group of snacks. They have been known to be partial to one particular group and “accidentally” eat their brother’s snacks!

Then I pack them all snuggly inside a container and slide it into the refrigerator.

Now all the boys have to do is go into the fridge and grab a snack! I don’t have to stop several times a day to make things and police what they are eating. This gives them boundaries and it saves us a lot of money.

What kinds of things do you do to make snack time easier? Any ideas to add? You know I am all about good ideas!

Perception of Happiness

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 15:40:00 +0000

This morning I happened to catch a segment on the Today Show about how women's happiness is progressively declining. Apparently, research shows that women who are well educated, successful, healthy, and achieving all of their goals are still not happy. In fact, while going through a list that consisted of: being a mother, achieving a certain income, improving their physical appearance, meeting Mr. Right, and even attaining a social celebrity status, it was mentioned that not one of these events contributed to improving their happiness overall.

That is just sad. No pun was intended.

What is going on here? Is it that women have such a long list of things that they want to check off that they never feel accomplished and thus unhappy? Perhaps responsibilities that should be a priority but were overlooked in the pursuit of other things keep them from enjoying the success? Who knows?

I guess we could also argue that the media plays a significant role in all of this. After all, 100 years ago there was no TV or movies. Tabloids didn't exist. The only pressure a woman felt to succeed was from her desire to provide the best home possible for her family. But we should also be fair and state that she couldn't have been that "happy" all the time either. Every time she gave birth there was a 50% chance that her baby wouldn't make it to the age of 2. There was also a much greater chance that her husband would be murdered or die from an accident in the field. That must have been pretty stressful and heartbreaking to live through.

The truth is that happiness is an emotion that is temporarily obtained by circumstances. Our circumstances will not always be pleasant. We are going to go through things. We can't control our surroundings or the people in them. We can't predetermine what way to travel to avoid the frustration of traffic. We can't control the economy or our kids. For some it is that lack of control that brings on the unhappiness.

Happiness is a God-given gift that should be enjoyed and remembered to carry us through the not-so-happy times.

We shouldn't try to achieve happiness because we will usually end up failing and getting the opposite result. The one thing we should strive for is typically overlooked. It is something that you can have whether you are happy or sad.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
John 14:27

Peace is what we need. Peace is what we should pray for, strive for, and actively pursue. Peace can exist among tragedy or triumph. Happiness can't. Sadness can't. Obtain peace. That is the pursuit you should be after...

If your sinful nature controls your mind, there is death. But if the Holy Spirit controls your mind, there is life and peace.
Romans 8:6

Your input requested...

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 14:58:00 +0000

We have so much going on at A Woman Inspired right now. I've been training ladies to do different jobs and we are anxiously awaiting the reveal of the new site. Lisa Boyd is awesome and I just know she is going to give us a site that is beyond our expectations. I'm really excited about all of the ministries and ladies that are jumping on board to encourage and inspire others. It is absolutely a biblical representation of the body of Christ working together for one common goal. I really want to make sure that we give women a platform to follow the Titus 2 model:

Titus 2:3-5 (New International Version)

³Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. ⁴Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, ⁵to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

A major part of teaching is inspiring the student to put into practice what they have learned. I find that videos and photos have a way of bringing confidence that you can do something since you can see the goal that you are striving for. Have I lost you yet?

I've had a couple of ladies inquire about doing videos and photo tutorials in a few key areas to women: cooking, health and beauty care, proper cleaning, and other things of that nature. My question is what do you think about that and what would you expect to receive if we incorporate this? What do you want to learn? What is important to you to know and become better at? Would you be interested in doing any videos and submitting them?

These videos would be a part of our monthly newsletter and displayed on our site. It would be specific categories, nothing random. Give me some feedback. You know I love to hear from you!

You have to know when to let go...

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 17:23:00 +0000

One thing that I have discovered over the last couple of months is that life, my household, and ministry really do go on without me. Now that may be old news to some of you but to me it was quite the revelation. I guess I had the frame of mind that says "if someone can't do it just like me then I might as well do it myself because it takes too much time to teach them how to do it just like me."

I know that none of you have ever thought that.

I guess sometimes God really does have to use acute bouts of exhaustion and morning sickness to teach you a thing or two. I mean how else does one realize that that although they are quite capable, effective, and may have even worked out the perfect schedule in which to get a jillion things done that it might still not be God's perfect will for them? Lying in bed unable to move will cause you to ponder these things.

I'm still preaching to the choir. Bear with me.

I find it funny that I have often YELLED (via chat) at Amy Stults to let go of some things and trust other people to do them so that she would have a little room left on her plate for dessert yet... I didn't yield to the same advice. I am not the only one capable of designing the layout of a magazine, newsletter, document, or website so why do I constantly push myself to do it as though I am the only one?

God taught me - the hard way I might add - that He created the body of Christ for a reason. "Body" being the keyword here. Just because I can pick up a pencil with my toes and move them enough to create what might resemble writing it doesn't mean that my toes should do all of the writing. I've had to swallow my pride and allow others to do work that quite frankly, took up too much of my time and energy when it wasn't necessary.

I've spent the last couple of weeks training different people to do different jobs over at Heart of the Matter and A Woman Inspired and you know what? I feel like a semi truck has been lifted off of my shoulders. He sent just the right people at just the right time. It is simply amazing. Now I can focus on the ministry aspect of it all...

He is so good!

So am I really preaching to the choir here or do any of you ever go through things like this?

The Twitter Phenomenon

inquiry@amybayliss.com (Amy Bayliss) — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 16:06:00 +0000

My husband likes to set the alarm to blare the radio really, really loud in the morning. Now he does this so that I'll actually get up. Truth be told I am not a morning person and well since I can no longer have coffee, mornings are even harder on me.

So back to blaring radios.

This morning on our local news station the host announces that Miley Cyrus is giving up Twittering because her boyfriend is uncomfortable with such private information being put out to the public. That got me thinking...

You see, I think Twitter is a magnificent tool for socializing online and spreading the word. Granted, I haven't been using it much considering I've been comatose and/or enjoying the effects of morning sickness but when I do log on there are certain things that engage me and encourage me to respond. Others, it is like reading a play by play of the person's day and I'm just not as interested in that.

I guess it is really all about how you view Twitter. Is it a daily diary of events in your life that you like to share with everyone or is it a way to have a conversation with friends all over the world? I prefer the conversation.

So what kinds of "tweets" work and which don't? Here are some great tweets that engage in conversation: (and yes, these are real tweets by others that I follow)

The red outfit or the black outfit? My toes are pink.
God led me to Philemon. What is in Philemon? Who is Philemon?
I need a 7 letter word for "state of being or condition" so I can finish this 3 year crossword.
Should I delete, mark all as read, or actually reply to all of them?
If this were like the rest of the world, "Pay-per-Tweet" then what would you tweet?
Better question, "what would Jesus tweet?"
I've been on Twitter now for 2 hours straight! Agh! What is your record?

Those tweets triggered me to respond. Now of course, there are some that are so witty that I actually laugh out loud and cause my family to think I'm nuts but I don't usually reply to them. I might retweet but that occasion is few and far between. But... I am a sucker for a witty tweet.

I literally just walked into the wall while tweeting. Don't act like you've never done it.
Don’t just think outside the box, go ahead and get out of it…
when clicked to add myself as friend on digg it said “You cannot befriend yourself silly. Go find some new friends!”
My artificial plant died. I guess I should have pretended to water it.
Face it. As long as there are tests there will be prayer in schools. We win!
I wondered why the frisbee kept getting bigger... and then it hit me.
I am a firm believer that pushing harder on the remote buttons works even if the battery is dead.

The ones I don't really pay attention to are those that simply state what the person is currently doing... like having coffee, going to work, yada, yada. Unless of course it is a friend and then I can pick with them but for people I don't know I just ignore those.

So there you have it. My unofficial, unprofessional, somewhat guide to what to do on Twitter.

What kind of tweets do you respond to?