Andrew Malcolm - Investors.com

Vlad and Barack: Brothers in arms (deliveries)

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 13:02:00 GMT

It's great, isn't it, to see Barack Obama, the ex-state senator so eager to avoid confrontations, getting along so well with Vladimir Putin, the former Russian KGB chief?

Things must be hunky-dory between the world's top two nuclear powers, just as Obama promised during his 'secret' whispers in Seoul last year. Why shouldn't the two be smiling for the cameras?

They're staying at a posh Irish resort for another of these expensive G-297 or whatever meetings that mean zippo, except for the padded expense accounts of journalists there who'll pass on to their news consumers all the official Pablum dished out.

The lights are on these two leaders. Their wives are not present. Well, Putin doesn't have a wife anymore. And Michelle Obama is touristing in Dublin with her daughters. Never mind sequester, all three get suites with Mrs. Obama's costing American taxpayers $3,300 per night. (Scroll down for a peek.)

The family's Ireland visit is cheap by Obama standards, "only" five-million taxpayer dollars. The Obama family's trip to Africa later this month is estimated to cost up to $100 million. (And don't forget Joe Biden's $585,000 hotel bill--for one night?)

And then there's Michelle Obama's entourage, enough staff to fill 30 luxury hotel rooms. "It is good to be home," Mrs. Obama told one possibly-puzzled Irish audience.

The Obama-Putin domestic political problems should be left at home. Putin's problems somehow have a way of getting arrested or silenced. But he's had a grand time recently making fun of Obama's NSA citizen monitoring scandal as not really consistent with an open, democratic society.

The American is expected to get backstage earfuls from allies over NSA leaker Edward Snowden's revelations that Americans closely monitored all participants at previous G-whatever summits.

Anyway, the public Putin-Obama face presented Monday was jovial, if empty. And questions were forbidden. (Scroll down for their complete joint text.)

Take this candid statement from Putin: "We also spoke about the problem of North Korea, and we agreed to emphasize our interaction on all the directions." And you can take that to the bank, folks, whatever "that" is.

Or Obama: "We had a discussion about the fact as the two nuclear superpowers, we have a special obligation to try to continue to reduce tensions." Well, that's an immense relief.

Putin on Syria: "Of course, our opinions do not coincide, but all............

Democrat Obama vows to spy on gays equally with other Americans

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 13:04:00 GMT

Our 153,000 combined followers on Twitter (click here for that) and on Facebook (then click here to subscribe to that) know that on weekday afternoons we regularly share a selection of that evening's late-night jokes before broadcast.

Usually, we publish a collection of these jokes at the start of each week.

Fallon: Last week Obama asked China's president to stop spying on Americans. And the Chinese leader responded, "You first."

Conan: Everyone please turn off your phones. I've got some jokes I don't want the government to hear.

Leno: Eliot Spitzer and John Edwards both have birthdays the other day. Which explains why no strippers were available for other parties.

Fallon: Hillary Clinton finally joined Twitter and got more than 200,000 followers in five hours. They were like, "Hillary in 2016!" and "Washington needs Hillary!" "Hillary for the White House!" That's not her followers. Those were her tweets.

Leno: A new article says online readers rarely finish what they're reading online. At least I think that's what it said. It was two pages long.

Conan: Marco Rubio announced a new bill to require immigrants to learn English to become citizens. Many Americans say it's the goodest news they has heard all year.

Conan: The new Playstation 4 will allow gamers to record video footage of their gaming and share it with friends. All the gamers would need is an Internet connection and friends.

Conan: An anonymous bidder paid $1 million for a private lunch with billionaire investor Warren Buffett. The first tip Warren Buffet gave him is, "Stop paying $1 million for lunch -- you moron."

Conan: We're learning more about the NSA leaker who started this whole scandal. Edward Snowden's girlfriend is a pole-dancer. I guess that settles the debate over whether or not he's a hero.

Leno: The good news is Tim Tebow got a job playing for Boston. The bad news is, it's the Patriots. So now the IRS is investigating him.

Leno: The NSA leaker said he exposed the scandal because he felt he was part of something doing far more harm than good. Why can't we convince the Kardashians of that?

Letterman: The old Secy. of State Hillary Clinton is on Twitter now. A politician on Twitter. What could possibly go wrong?

Letterman: We had a terrible show last night. Tell you............

Obama: 'Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there'

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 13:40:00 GMT

President Obama's weekly remarks

Hi, everybody. This Sunday is Father's Day, and so I wanted to take a moment to talk about the most important job many of us will ever have -- and that's being a dad.

Today we're blessed to live in a world where technology allows us to connect instantly with just about anyone on the planet. But no matter how advanced we get, there will never be a substitute for the love and support and, most importantly, the presence of a parent in a child's life. And in many ways, that's uniquely true for fathers.

I never really knew my own father. I was raised by a single mom and two wonderful grandparents who made incredible sacrifices for me. And there are single parents all across the country who do a heroic job raising terrific kids. But I still wish I had a dad who was not only around, but involved; another role model to teach me what my mom did her best to instill -- values like hard work and integrity; responsibility and delayed gratification -- all the things that give a child the foundation to envision a brighter future for themselves.

That's why I try every day to be for Michelle and my girls what my father was not for my mother and me. And I've met plenty of other people -- dads and uncles and men without a family connection -- who are trying to break the cycle and give more of our young people a strong male role model.

Being a good parent -- whether you're gay or straight; a foster parent or a grandparent -- isn't easy. It demands your constant attention, frequent sacrifice, and a healthy dose of patience. And nobody's perfect. To this day, I'm still figuring out how to be a better husband to my wife and father to my kids.

And I want to do what I can as President to encourage marriage and strong families. We should reform our child support laws to get more men working and engaged with their children. And my Administration will continue to work with the faith and other community organizations, as well as businesses, on a campaign to encourage strong parenting and fatherhood.

Because if there's one thing I've learned along the way, it's that all our personal successes shine a little less brightly if we fail at family. That's what matters most. When I look back on my life, I won't be thinking about any particular legislation I passed or policy I promoted. I'll be thinking about Michelle, and the journey we've been on together. I'll be thinking about Sasha's dance recitals and Malia's tennis matches -- about the conversations we've had and the quiet moments we've shared. I'll be thinking about whether I did right by them, and whether they knew, every day, just how much they were loved.

That's what I think being a father is all about. And if we can do our best to be a source of comfort and encouragement to our kids; if we can show them unconditional love and help them grow into the people they were meant to be; then we will have succeeded.

Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there, and have a great weekend. ####

Obama's long history of scandals--and his escapes

Barack Obama: Real Good Talker, Really Bad Communicator

The latest Obama polls you will never see reported in the MSM

GOP: Do you realize Obama is seizing control of local education too?

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 13:02:00 GMT

Sen. Lamar Alexander gives the Republican Party Weekly Remarks

I'm United States Senator Lamar Alexander.

This is the season for high school graduations. And more than two million of those graduating are going to college. (Scroll down for video of these complete remarks.)

Both Republicans and Democrats agree that college is the surest ticket to the middle class and we want to help by making it simpler and smarter to get a student loan.

That's why the Republican House of Representatives has passed, and President Obama and Senate Republicans agree, on the same idea: A permanent solution to all student loan interest rates before some automatically rise on July first. The idea is to allow the market to set interest rates.

It's fairer to students and fairer to taxpayers.

Now some Senate Democrats want a short-term political fix that will only benefit forty percent of new student loans, but they stand alone.

Between now and the end of the month, Senate Republicans will work hard with the President and with the House to produce an agreement that ensures all student borrowers benefit from today's low interest rates. That would mean that 100 percent of all new student loans made this year would have a rate below five percent.

We may be in agreement on student loans, but we have a major disagreement about who should be in charge of our 100,000 public schools that educate 50 million American children.

To put it simply, Democrats want a national school board; Republicans favor local control.

Over the last decade, the United States Department of Education has become so congested with federal mandates that it has actually become, in effect, a national school board.

If you remember the childhood game, 'Mother, May I?' then you have a pretty good sense of how the process works--states must come to Washington for approval of their plans to educate their students.

This congestion of mandates is caused by three things: No Child Left Behind, Race to the Top, and the administration's use of waivers. Together, they've imposed federal standards for what children must know in reading and math, they've coerced some states into adopting Common Core standards, and they've imposed federal definitions of how a state should measure school, teacher, and principal performance.

This week, Senate Democrats reported to the full Senate an eleven-hundred-and-fifty-page plan that would not only freeze these mandates into place, but double down, creating more than twenty-five new programs as well as more than 150 new reporting requirements.

Republicans voted to move in a different direction. We offered............

Obama, campaigning again, blames D.C. mess on pols campaigning too much

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 13:06:00 GMT

An amazing scene in Boston yesterday.

Barack Obama returned to the city of one of his biggest triumphs (his 2004 Democrat convention speech) and one of his worst political spankings (the 2010 repudiation by Massachusetts Senate voters of his candidate).

Those were tough days for the ex-state legislator, you may remember. Virginia voters had just rejected Obama's choice for governor. New Jersey voters had just rejected Obama's choice for governor.

Both setbacks were indicators of the rising tide of dissatisfaction over Obama's preoccupation with ObamaCare when what voters really wanted was Joe Biden's three-letter word, "J-O-B-S."

Americans are still waiting for Obama's employment extravaganza. But meantime later in 2010, they turned the House over to Republicans in an historic surge. Obama now says his big goal is to get that speaker's gavel back in the more compliant hands of Nancy Pelosi.

In January, 2010, Massachusetts voters were filling Ted Kennedy's Senate seat, a seat filled by Democrat bottoms since 1952. As in the middle of last century. Nine years before Obama was born you-know-where.

Hours before polls opened, Obama went up to Boston to campaign for and with Democrat Martha Coakley, as he'd done with his chosen ones in New Jersey and Virginia. Coakley had been slipping in the polls. And the White House wanted to give her one last push across the finish line.

Bay State Democrats responded to the president's special, special-election attention by electing lowly state legislator Scott Brown. Oh, look! He was a Republican.

Brown opted out last year and some Native American woman got in. Then this year Obama needed a new secretary of State to not rescue any Americans abroad surrounded by terrorists. He picked Sen. John Kerry, who represented Massachusetts, although he moors his yacht in Rhode Island to save on property taxes.

Kerry's departure set up the current contest, a special June 25 election between long-time liberal Democrat Rep. Ed Markey, who's never missed a photo op with a PBS character, and Gabriel Gomez, a former fighter pilot and Navy SEAL turned businessman with his moderate GOP brand and Hispanic heritage. (Scroll to the bottom for a C-SPAN video of the June 5 Gomez-Markey debate.)

Markey has 36 years of Washington maneuvering to Gomez' none. But............

Barack Obama: Real Good Talker, Really Bad Communicator

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 13:02:00 GMT

Once upon a time Barack Obama was known as a good speech-giver. That's how he debuted in 2004 and why he almost always relies on a teleprompter; so he can concentrate on the delivery, not the content.

Does he even know how often he rotely says "I am absolutely confident"? Watch him on these day-trip photo ops. This afternoon Boston. Tonight Miami. He's like a tired actor in a long-running Broadway play, reciting the same lines over and over with less and less conviction.

For the big summit with China's new president the other day, America's first lady didn't even bother to go. She sent a letter instead to China's first lady.

Recall last week when Obama had no teleprompter and staff forgot to deliver his speech to the podium? The most powerful man in the world was speechless, literally. Flummoxed. Improv not his thing. Had no idea what to do or say. Reduced to mocking his own staff. Hilarious video here.

Turns out though, we now know, Obama might sound good. But he's actually an awful communicator.

There've been past signs of this weakness: He and the Mrs. are totally tone-deaf to political optics. Thousands die in Japan's double-tsunami; Obama plays golf. The worst environmental disaster in the nation's history hits the Gulf coast. Obama takes days to visit, weeks to address the country, wife goes to Spain on luxury vacation before the family hits Martha's Vineyard for another.

As unemployment soars and the economy sours, the Chicago crowd parties at the White House with Hollywood glamor pals and bundlers. While three dozen Obama staffers fall a third-of-a-million dollars behind in income taxes.

Now, comes the first year of Obama's second term and the man Bill Clinton once called "the amateur" is flailing, clearly in over his head.

Reduced to saying he didn't know about this scandal or that investigation. Imagine how bad the real reasons must be for the President of the United States to publicly admit he's so badly out of the loop in his own administration. At one point he even talked of the Internal Revenue Service as if the department wasn't his responsibility.

Hello, South Sider. Can you hear me now?

Second terms are problematic for many presidents. Can you............

Obama's IRS won't do Powerball winner's taxes til it knows her political party

Tue, 11 Jun 2013 13:00:00 GMT

Our more than 153,000 combined followers on Twitter (click here for that) and on Facebook (then click here to subscribe to that) know that on weekday afternoons we regularly share a selection of that evening's late-night jokes before broadcast.

Usually, we publish a collection of these jokes near the start of each week.

Conan: The founder of IKEA has stepped down. He said he plans on spending some time putting his life back together.

Fallon: There's apparently a 66-year-old man in China who just found out that he is actually a woman. Yeah, he went his whole life thinking he had a yin, when it turns out he had a yang.

Leno: Obama's been spying on all our phones. How about he spies on the IRS next time it has a $4 million party with our money?

Fallon: Russia has enacted a new law that bans smoking in public places. Smokers there weren't happy at all. They were like, "What is this, Russia?"

Fallon: Google says it's buying a wind farm in Sweden. Not to be outdone, Bing is buying an oscillating fan off Craigslist.

Fallon: Disney World hikes ticket prices so it will cost a family of four almost $400 for a day in the park. Which explains the new vacation plan: Buy a Mickey Mouse costume and take the kids to Six Flags.

Conan: An 84-year-old Florida woman finally claimed her $590 million Powerball prize. For the last two weeks she's been driving home from buying the ticket.

Conan: That Taco Bell employee photographed licking a stack of taco shells has been fired. He's been replaced by Michael Douglas.

Conan: Michelle Obama got into a heated face-to-face confrontation with a heckler who turned out to be a lesbian. After hearing this, Bill Clinton said, "This story just keeps getting hotter and hotter."

Leno: That elderly Florida lottery winner is happy about the $590 million. But the IRS can't calculate her taxes until agents determine if she's a Republican or Democrat.

Fallon: Obama's National Security Agency has collected Verizon phone records for weeks. That explains Verizon's new ad, "They can hear you now."

Conan: Florida Sen. Marco Rubio says he'll vote against............