People, Life and Quotes of International Training and Trainers

Motivational Video Rebirth of an Eagle [del.icio.us]

2011-04-28T00:11:03-07:00

Randy Pausch - Points on How to Improve your Life

2010-09-17T22:41:00.000-07:00

By Randy Pausch

This is amazing, he died of pancreatic cancer in 2008, but wrote a book ‘The last lecture” before then, one of the bestsellers in 2007. What a legacy to leave behind…

In a letter to his wife Jai and his children, Dylan, Logan, and Chloe, he wrote this beautiful "guide to a better life" for his wife and children to follow. May you be blessed by his insight.

POINTS ON HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE

Personality:
1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment
3. Don't over do; keep your limits
4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does
5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
6. Dream more while you are awake
7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..
8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
10. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
11. No one is in charge of your happiness except you
12. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.
Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
13. Smile and laugh more
14. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Community:
15. Call your family often
16. Each day give something good to others
17. Forgive everyone for everything
18. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
19. Try to make at least three people smile each day
20. What other people think of you is none of your business
21. Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
22. Put GOD first in anything and everything that you think, say and do.
23. GOD heals everything
24. Do the right things
25. However good or bad a situation is, it will change
26. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up
27. The best is yet to come
28. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful
29. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it
30. If you know GOD you will always be happy. So, be happy.

While you practice all of the above, share this knowledge with the people you love, people you school with, people you play with, people you work with and people you live with. Not only will it enrich YOUR life, but also that of those around you.

Nine Things You Simply Must Do

2010-09-17T18:03:00.000-07:00

By Dr. John C. Maxwell

Oprah Winfrey and Anderson Cooper are two of the most popular media personalities in America. Yet,
their backgrounds hardly could be more dissimilar. Oprah was born to unmarried teenage parents in rural
Mississippi. Anderson’s mother was fashionable railroad heiress, Gloria Vanderbilt, and his father was a
successful writer/editor in Manhattan. Oprah grew up in poverty, spending her childhood in the inner-city
ghettoes of Milwaukee. Anderson was born into wealth. He appeared with his mom on The Tonight Show
when he was three, and he modeled for Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren, and Macy’s as a child.

Yet, for all of their differences (background, race, and gender), Oprah Winfrey and Anderson Cooper
have unmistakable similarities. At some level, they resemble each other. They have an aura of success
that identifies one with the other.

For example, both Oprah and Anderson Cooper consistently deliver. Whether it’s a talk show, a book
club, or a cause she has adopted, we can rely on Oprah’s candor, inspiring energy, and excellence. The
same consistency can be attributed to Anderson Cooper. One night he’s reporting from New York, the
next night from Cairo, and he’s in London the day after that. Yet, when we turn on CNN, we can count on
him to be poised, polished, and deliver the news with excellence.

What is it about successful people, like Oprah and Anderson Cooper, who, although completely different
in background and style, are almost identical in their approach to work and life? In his book, 9 Things You
Simply Must Do to Succeed in Love and Life, Dr. Henry Cloud passes along his observations of nine
principles commonly practiced by the successful people he knows. The book drips with leadership
application, and I would like to take this lesson to summarize Dr. Cloud’s insights.

Principle #1: Dig It Up
Each person has a treasure trove of ability inside of them. Everyone has dreams and desires lodged
within their soul. Why do some people dig deep and take hold of their dreams while others let them drift
away?

According to Dr. Cloud, successful people give sustained attention to what stirs within them. They find
outlets for their passions. Exercising their strengths is non-negotiable.

Principle #2: Pull the Tooth
Many people I know have an irrational fear of the dentist’s office. The idea of someone poking and
prodding in their mouth fills them with dread. Amazingly, some people are afraid to the point where they
would rather suffer discomfort day after day rather than undergo the temporary pain of a visit to the
dentist.

As Dr. Cloud has observed, successful people go to the dentist. They face their fears and make the
appointment. They pull the tooth that is causing the nagging ache and, by enduring the pain, they come
out better on the other side.

Successful people refuse to carry their baggage through life. They confront their hurt, disappointment,
and anger early, and they seek emotional freedom from life’s injuries. Likewise, successful people quickly
recover when they fail. Rather than succumbing to a downward spiral of disappointment (or even
depression) they come to terms with the failure, make course adjustments to their lives, and move on.

Principle #3: Play the Movie
Dr. Cloud recommends the exercise of playing a movie of your life in which you are the hero or heroine.
What traits does your character have? What happens during the plot of the movie? Who do you starring
alongside you? How does your movie inspire the people in the theater?

Most people live their life and then look at it. Do the opposite. Look at your life and then live it. Envision
and step toward the future you want to experience. Don’t wake up one day to realize that your life is like a
B-grade movie—you don’t want to leave in the middle, but you would never want to watch it again!

Principle #4: Do Something
Dr. Cloud’s fourth principle is short and to the point: successful people do something. They initiate,
create, and generate. Successful leaders are proactive as opposed to reactive. “They do not see
themselves as victims of circumstances,” Cloud writes, “But as active participants who take steps to
influence outcomes.” Their days and their lives are controlled by internal motivations rather than external
currents.

In a similar vein, successful people take ownership for their destinations in life. They don’t assign blame;
they welcome responsibility. They refuse to cede their freedom to others and live dependently. The
successful person has done leadership’s toughest task—mastered the art of self-leadership. The benefit
of leading yourself well is that you don’t have to rely on others to provide direction for your life. You get to
plan the course.

Principle #5: Act Like An Ant
“Go to the ant, you sluggard;
Consider its ways and be wise!
It has no commander,
No over seer or ruler,
Yet it stores its provisions in summer
And gathers its food at the harvest.”
-Proverbs 6:6-8
Dr. Cloud points to the ant to develop another principle of success. Three lessons stand out from the
metaphor of the ant. First, they appreciate the ethic of hard work. Their lives are a flurry of constant
activity as they tirelessly search for food. Second, ants refuse to give up. They never abandon the hunt,
crawling through cracks and crevices in their pursuit of a morsel. Third, ants understand the value of
compounding. Grain by grain an ant builds the hill that becomes its home, and crumb by crumb they
accumulate storehouses of food.

Principle #6: Hate Well
In his writing, Dr. Cloud talks about focusing feelings of anger constructively to solve problems or end
injustice. As he develops his idea of “hating well,” he distinguishes between subjective hate and objective
hate.

Subjective hate is toxic. Dr. Cloud describes it as, “a pool of feelings and attitudes that resides in our soul,
waiting for expression. It is not directed at anything specific or caused on any given day by any specific
object. It is already there, sort of like an infection of the soul.” Subjective hate poisons and corrupts the
person who houses it.

On the contrary, objective hate can be described as anger with a purpose. Objective hate protects by
standing in opposition to dishonesty, exploitation, or deceit. Objective hate may spark entrepreneurship.
In fact, many successful businesses have begun as a result of the founder’s hatred of poor service or
shoddy quality.

Principle #7: Don’t Play Fair
Fairness says “an eye for an eye,” or “a tooth for a tooth.” Fairness weighs all actions in a balance and
continuously moves to equilibrium. The rule of fairness means good actions deserve kind responses, and
bad behavior deserves punishment.

In Dr. Cloud’s opinion, living in accordance with fairness will destroy every relationship in life. With
everyone keeping score of favors bestowed and received, eventually someone will feel victimized when a
good deed goes unreturned. As a leader, I’ve learned the high road is the only road to travel on. Don’t
treat others according to what they deserve; treat them even better than you would prefer to be treated.
By doing so, you’ll keep integrity and avoid sticky accusations or petty arguments.

Principle #8: Be Humble
“Pride is concerned with who is right.
Humility is concerned with what is right.”
-Ezra Taft Benson
In Dr. Cloud’s estimation, successful people have a healthy dose of humility. Humility has an internal and
external component. Internally, humility comes when we admit our errors, and open ourselves to
instruction. Externally, humility is gained when we show patience for the faults of others, and when we are
quick to shine the spotlight on the successes of others.

Principle #9: Upset the Right People
A person’s success will always be inhibited if he or she tries to please all of the people all of the time. I
like how Dr. Cloud explains the principle of upsetting the right people:
Do not try to avoid upsetting people; just make sure that you are upsetting the right ones. If the kind,
loving, responsible, and honest people are upset with you, then you had better look at the choices you
are making. But if the controlling, hot and cold, irresponsible or manipulative people are upset with you,
then take courage!

Be likeable and be gracious, but don’t sacrifice your identity or values for the sake of harmony.

Review: 9 Things You Simply Must Do for Success
Principle #1 – Dig It Up
Principle #2 – Pull the Tooth
Principle #3 – Play the Movie
Principle #4 – Do Something
Principle #5 – Act Like an Ant
Principle #6 – Hate Well
Principle #7 – Don’t Play Fair
Principle #8 – Be Humble
Principle #9 – Upset the Right People

Stephen Covey and his 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

2010-07-19T19:07:00.000-07:00

Dr Stephen Covey's Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People®

Dr Stephen Covey is a hugely influential management guru, whose book The Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People, became a blueprint for personal development when it was published in 1990.

The Seven Habits are a remarkable set of inspirational and aspirational standards for anyone who seeks to live a full, purposeful and good life. Covey's values are full of integrity and humanity, and contrast strongly with the colder logic- and process-based ideologies that characterised management thinking in earlier times.

Habit 1 - Be Proactive
This is the ability to control one's environment, rather than have it control you, as is so often the case. Self determination, choice, and the power to decide response to stimulus, conditions and circumstances

Habit 2 - Begin with the End in Mind
Covey calls this the habit of personal leadership - leading oneself that is, towards what you consider your aims. By developing the habit of concentrating on relevant activities you will build a platform to avoid distractions and become more productive and successful.

Habit 3 - Put First things First
Covey calls this the habit of personal management. This is about organising and implementing activities in line with the aims established in habit 2. Covey says that habit 2 is the first, or mental creation; habit 3 is the second, or physical creation.

Habit 4 - Think Win-Win
Covey calls this the habit of interpersonal leadership, necessary because achievements are largely dependent on co-operative efforts with others. He says that win-win is based on the assumption that there is plenty for everyone, and that success follows a co-operative approach more naturally than the confrontation of win-or-lose.

Habit 5 - Seek first to Understand and then to be Understood
One of the great maxims of the modern age. This is Covey's habit of communication, and it's extremely powerful. Covey helps to explain this in his simple analogy 'diagnose before you prescribe'. Simple and effective, and essential for developing and maintaining positive relationships in all aspects of life.

Habit 6 - Synergize
Covey says this is the habit of creative co-operation - the principle that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, which implicitly lays down the challenge to see the good and potential in the other person's contribution.

Habit 7 - Sharpen the Saw
This is the habit of self renewal, says Covey, and it necessarily surrounds all the other habits, enabling and encouraging them to happen and grow. Covey interprets the self into four parts: the spiritual, mental, physical and the social/emotional, which all need feeding and developing.

Stephen Covey's Seven Habits are a simple set of rules for life - inter-related and synergistic, easy to practice and implement in practical life.

NLP Training - Master Practitioner

2010-05-26T05:13:00.000-07:00

Excerpt from NLP Master Practitioner Certification Course
with Dr. William Horton

The Myth of Time Management [del.icio.us]

2010-04-11T20:01:47-07:00

Leadership and Daniel Goleman

2010-03-21T22:42:00.000-07:00

How does NLP anchoring works?

2010-01-09T04:41:00.000-08:00

How does NLP anchoring works?

Ever heard of Russian physiologist & psychologist Ivan Pavlov? He is most well known for his findings on human and animal conditioning. While doing a research on dogs’ digestion, he discovered this phenomenon. When it came to meal time, Pavlov would use bells to call his dogs to the food. After repeating this numerous times, he found that even without any food, the dogs would salivate from hearing the sound of the bell.
By doing so, Pavlov associated the ringing sound of the bell to food. And the numerous repetitions have conditioned the dogs to respond to the ringing bell just like how they respond to food.
This is how NLP anchoring works. By conditioning responses to unique NLP anchors, we are able to deliberately get into specific states just by triggering the unique NLP anchor. Just like Pavlov’s dogs.
So NLP anchors are really a stimulus for us to get into whatever states we want. Similarly as Pavlov uses the ringing bell sound to act as a stimulus, with NLP anchoring, we can set certain anchors to act as the stimulus to certain states. And after many repetitions, the association between the NLP anchor and the state will be conditioned.
How to set NLP anchors?
The premise of setting NLP anchors is basically the same as Pavlov and his dogs. You set an NLP anchor by associating a unique trigger to a certain state. When in that state, trigger a unique anchor to associate the anchor and the state together.
After repeating that process numerous times, that state will be conditioned to the anchor. Subsequently when you trigger that anchor later on, it will bring you to that state.
Here’s an example. When you are in happy state, anchor that feeling to a unique trigger, let’s say a light pinch on the palm of your left hand. Repeat that process numerous times. Once it is conditioned, each time you pinch your left palm you will be in a state of happiness.
The steps below are the way to set NLP anchors. Let’s say you want to set an anchor for happiness.

1. Get yourself into a happy state. Think of a past experiences when you were happy. Construct happy thoughts and images. Visualize yourself and your loved ones smiling, laughing etc.

2. At the peak of your state, at the most intense feeling happiness, fire off a unique anchor. Let’s say to pinch your left palm. Fire off the anchor a few more times (means pinching your palm a few more times) as long as you are still in that peak state.

3. Change to a neutral state. Break your state by standing up, moving around, shaking yourself out of it. Then repeat the process again. After numerous repetitions, the state will be anchored into you.

A fairly simple process although getting into the desired state in the first place may prove to be a problem for some people. The best way to get into the desired state would be to remember and re-live the memory of past experiences when you were in that state. When there isn’t any relevant past experiences, constructing images or sounds of situations with that experience may help.

Another NLP method may help to get you into a desired state as well. NLP submodalities involves mapping the blueprint of feelings & states, so that whenever you run the blueprint, it will get you into that state.

Your anchors can be a touch at a specific area, a pinch, pressure (pushing in), saying a word or making a sound, looking at a certain image, listening to a sound, a certain music, song, ring a bell etc. It can be anything that our sensory cells can pick up.
However a point to note is that anchors that are made of any type of physical touch is usually a stronger compared against the sounds or visual triggers because biologically a physical touch or pressure has a stronger sensory impact on the body.
The effectiveness of an NLP anchor that you set depends on the following ;
• The intensity of the state – the stronger the intensity the better. Likewise if you set the anchor in a low intensity state, the effect will weak.
• Timing of the anchor – The timing of triggering the anchor is just as important. To be most effective, only trigger the anchor at the peak moment of the state. At it’s most intense moment.
• Uniqueness of the anchor – Make sure your anchor is unique. Something that you don’t normally do, see or hear everyday. For example actions like scratching, snapping your fingers or clapping hands are pretty common and we do it quite often. Use something really unique which isn’t part of your daily routine or gestures.
• Number of repetitions – Naturally the more repetitions you make, the more conditioned the anchor becomes. So make sure you do enough repetitions to make it conditioned.

NLP Anchoring

2010-01-09T04:37:00.000-08:00

Learn NLP Anchoring Techniques

NLP anchoring is one of the most popular NLP techniques out there because of it’s power and immediate impact. With it you can choose to deliberately put yourself in any chosen state such as happiness, energetic, confident, cheerful, creative, calm etc in the blink of an eye.

The term NLP anchors came about by liking the impact of the technique to that of a ship’s anchor. What is the use of a ship anchor? It is to keep a ship in place when it is not sailing. This is to prevent the ocean waves from pushing the ship away. The anchor locks the ship in a specific location.

In the same way, NLP anchors does to us what a ship anchor does to a ship. It keeps us in a certain place (or rather a certain state for a more accurate depiction). By setting up NLP anchors to different states/mood, whenever we trigger that anchor we will immediately be brought to that state.

Self Confidence

2009-12-19T08:21:00.000-08:00

Self confidence is a mental habit. Once you start using it, your self confidence builds more self confidence.

Confidence: A feeling of assurance, especially of self-assurance.

Confidence, or the lack of it, is a huge factor in peoples lives. One of the most common questions people ask is how they can have more confidence. What they are really asking is how they can have confidence at times when they do not. They feel that they could achieve what they want at those times if they felt confident. Confidence is a resourceful state of mind, whereas feeling unconfident generally gets in the way of taking action and finding solutions.

Confident and unconfident are two sides of the same coin.

Like a coin, only one side at a time is evident. Whenever un-confidence is felt, it indicates that confidence is present. Ironically, when a person feels unconfident they are quite confident that they feel unconfident. There are plenty of things they are confident about, that have brought them to the conclusion that they are unconfident about something.

To Feel Self Confidence: Stop thinking about what you can't do. Focusing on what you are confident you can do, puts you into a confident and resourceful state of mind.

Confidence, self assurance, is perceived as a feeling. The confident feeling and accompanying behavioral response are the same no matter what it is in reference to. To feel and behave confidently, mentally make an inventory of what you are confident you can do. Now confidently make a list of things you are confident you want to be able to do. Focusing on what you are confident you can do, will assist you to begin confidently learning to do what you want to be able to do confidently. You can be confident of that!

Secret to Success in 3 Minutes

2009-11-12T09:30:00.000-08:00

Why do people succeed? Is it because they're smart? Or are they just lucky? Neither. Analyst Richard St. John condenses years of interviews into an unmissable 3-minute slideshow on the real secrets of success.

Napoleon Hill - Think and Grow Rich - Mastermind Principles

2009-11-05T19:34:00.000-08:00

This is a message on film of Napoleon Hill discussing the power of the mastermind. He begins to discuss Henry Ford and refers to principles of success. Enjoy!!

Napoleon Hill - Think and Grow Rich - Video Part One

2009-11-05T19:29:00.000-08:00

This is rare footage from the early 1960's on "Think and Grow Rich". The Secret is based on Napoleon's principles. This is "The Secret behind the Secret."

Inspirational PPT Motivational PPT Videos Presentations leaders workshop leadership: Tony Robbins - Unlock what is Stopping You [del.icio.us]

2009-10-02T08:23:24-07:00

1. Ask yourself: What beliefs, goals or values may be in conflict? 2. Re-align your psychology so you naturally take action in the direction you want most. 3. Celebrate your achievements and pay it forward?

Dr.Wayne Dyre: You are What you Wish For

2009-09-12T21:16:00.000-07:00

Inspirational Team Work [del.icio.us]

2009-09-04T18:02:53-07:00

7 Habits of Highly Effective People [del.icio.us]

2009-08-22T05:19:27-07:00

Robin Sharma and Leadership Coaching

2009-07-03T21:21:00.000-07:00

Robin Sharma shares the secret of Leadership

Leadership Coaching with Robin Sharma

NLP - neuro-linguistic programming - free training introduction, NLP principles and techniques guide

2009-03-18T23:52:00.000-07:00

NLP - neuro-linguistic programming - free training introduction, NLP principles and techniques guide

This free introduction to NLP is provided by Robert Smith MBA, a leading international practitioner in neuro-linguistic programming and NLP Master Trainer. Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) was created in the early 1970s by Richard Bandler, a computer scientist and Gestalt therapist, and Dr John Grinder, a linguist and therapist. Bandler and Grinder invented a process known as 'modelling' that enabled them to study three of the world's greatest therapists: Dr Milton Erickson, father of modern hypnotherapy; Fritz Perls, creator of Gestalt therapy; and Virginia Satir, the mother of modern-day family therapy. They wanted to know what made these therapists effective and to train others in their methods. What is offered today as NLP is the product of this modelling process.

how does nlp optimise individual and organizational performance?

Neuro-Linguistic Programming is an extremely powerful concept. It is said by many to contain the most accessible, positive and useful aspects of modern psychology, and so can be helpful in virtually every aspect of personal and inter-personal relations. NLP has many beneficial uses for self-development, and for businesses and organizations; for example NLP enables better communications in customer service, and all types of selling. NLP enables better awareness and control of oneself, better appreciation of the other person's feelings and behavioural style, which in turn enables better empathy and cooperation. NLP improves understanding in all one-to-one communications, especially interviewing and appraisals (whether used by the interviewer or the interviewee). NLP certainly features strongly in facilitative selling. NLP is an enabling tool of Emotional Intelligence (EQ), which is an aspect of multiple intelligence theory. Neuro-Linguistic Programming can also be very helpful for stress management and developing self-belief and assertiveness and confidence. The empathic caring principles of NLP also assist the practical application of ethical and moral considerations (notably achieving detachment and objectivity), and using loving and compassionate ideas (simply, helping people) in work and life generally. These few examples illustrate the significance of NLP as a concept for personal and organizational development.

The experience of undergoing NLP training is a life-changing one for many people, and its techniques offer substantial advantages to people performing most roles in organizations:

Directors and executives
Managers at all levels
Sales people
Administrators
Engineering and technical staff
Customer care operatives
Receptionists
Secretarial staff
Trainers
HR and counselling staff

NLP techniques help particularly by making it possible for people to:

Set clear goals and define realistic strategies
Coach new and existing staff to help them gain greater satisfaction from their contribution
Understand and reduce stress and conflict
Improve new customer relationship-building and sales performance
Enhance the skills of customer care staff and reduce customer loss
Improve people's effectiveness, productivity and thereby profitability

nlp operational principles

NLP consists of a set of powerful techniques for rapid and effective behavioural modification, and an operational philosophy to guide their use. It is based on four operational principles, which below these headings are explained in more detail.

1. Know what outcome you want to achieve. (See nlp principle 1 - achieving outcomes.)

2. Have sufficient sensory acuity (acuity means clear understanding) to know if you are moving towards or away from your outcome (See nlp principle 2 - sensory awareness.)

3. Have sufficient flexibility of behaviour so that you can vary your behaviour until you get your outcome. (See nlp principle 3 - changing behaviour.)

4. Take action now. (See nlp principle 4 - time for action)

It is important to have specific outcomes. Many people do not have conscious outcomes and wander randomly through life. NLP stresses the importance of living with conscious purpose. In order to achieve outcomes it is necessary to act and speak in certain ways. NLP teaches a series of linguistic and behavioural patterns that have proved highly effective in enabling people to change the beliefs and behaviours of other people.

In using any of these patterns NLP stresses the importance of continuous calibration of the person or people you are interacting with in order to see if what you are doing is working. If it is not working it is important to do something different. The idea is to vary your behaviour until you get the results you want.

This variation in behaviour is not random. It involves the systematic application of NLP patterns. It is also important to take action, since nothing ever happens until someone takes the initiative. In short, NLP is about thinking, observing and doing to get what you want out of life.

nlp principle 1 - achieving outcomes

The importance of knowing your outcome cannot be stressed enough. Many people do not have conscious outcomes. Others have no idea what they want but know what they don't want. Their life is based on moving away from those things they don't want. NLP stresses the importance of moving towards those things you want. Without outcomes life becomes a process of wandering aimlessly. Once an outcome is determined you can begin to focus on achieving that outcome.

NLP lists certain well-formedness conditions that outcomes should meet. The first of these is that the outcome needs to be stated in positive terms. This means that the outcome must be what you want and not what you don't want to happen. Outcomes must be capable of being satisfied. It is both logically and practically impossible to give someone the negation of an experience. You can't engage in the process of 'not doing'. You can only engage in the process of doing.

The second well-formedness condition for outcomes is that the outcome must be testable and demonstrable in sensory experience. There must be an evidence procedure. Unless this is the case, there is no way to measure progress towards the achievement of the outcome. With an evidence procedure for the outcome it is possible to determine whether or not you are making progress towards achieving the outcome.

Third, the desired state must be sensory specific. You must be able to say what you would look like, sound like and feel like if you achieved the outcome.

Fourth, the outcome or desired state must be initiated and maintained by the subject. This places the locus (ie position) of control and responsibility for achieving the outcome with the subject and not with someone else. It is not a well-formed outcome when someone else does something or changes in some way. All you can do is have an outcome in which you can change yourself or your behaviour so as to bring about a change in someone else.

Fifth, the outcome must be appropriately and explicitly contextualised. This means that outcomes must not be stated as universals. You must never want either 'all the time' of 'never', but only under specific circumstances. In NLP we always strive to create more choice and never to take choice or reduce the number of possible responses. The goal instead is to make the choices or responses available in the appropriate circumstances.

Sixth, the desired outcome must preserve any positive product of the present state. If this is not the case then symptom substitution may occur.

Seventh and finally, the outcome or desired state must be ecologically sound. You should consider the consequences for yourself and for other people and not pursue outcomes that lead to harm to yourself or other people.

nlp principle 2 - sensory awareness

Once you know your outcome you must next have sufficient sensory acuity to know if you are moving towards it or not. NLP teaches the ability to calibrate or 'read' people. This involves the ability to interpret changes in muscle tone, skin colour and shininess, lower lip size and breathing rate and location. The NLP practitioner uses these and other indications to determine what effect they are having on other people. This information serves as feedback as to whether the other person is in the desired state. An important and often overlooked point is to know to stop when the other person is in the state that you desire.

nlp principle 3 - changing behaviour

The third operational principle of NLP is to vary your behaviour until you get the response you want.

If what you are doing isn't working, then you need to do something else. You should use your sensory acuity to determine if what you are doing is leading you in the desired direction of not. It what you are doing is leading towards your outcome, then you should continue. If, on the other hand, what you are doing is leading away from your goals, then you should do something else.

nlp principle 4 - time for action

The fourth and final operational principle of NLP is to take action now. There is no place for the slogan 'Complacency rules, and I don't care.' NLP is about taking action now to change behaviour for yourself and for others, now and in the future. So, to use another catchphrase: 'Don't delay; act today.'

nlp presuppositions

There are certain presuppositions underlying NLP. These are things that are presupposed in effective communication. Some of these are as follows. Below these headings each presupposition is explained in more detail.

1. The meaning of a communication is the response you get.

2. The map is not the territory.

3. Language is a secondary representation of experience.

4. Mind and body are parts of the same cybernetic system and affect each other.

5. The law of requisite variety (also known as the first law of cybernetics - cybernetics is the science of systems and controls in animals, including humans, and machines) states that in any cybernetic system the element or person in the system with the widest range of behaviours or variability of choice will control the system.

6. Behaviour is geared towards adaptation.

7. Present behaviour represents the very best choice available to a person.

8. Behaviour is to be evaluated and appreciated or changed as appropriate in the context presented.

9. People have all the resources they need to make the changes they want.

10. 'Possible in the world' or 'possible for me' is only a matter of how.

11. The highest quality information about other people is behavioural.

12. It is useful to make a distinction between behaviour and self.

13. There is no such thing as failure; there is only feedback.

nlp presupposition 1 - meaning equals response

In communication it is usually assumed that you are transferring information to another person. You have information that 'means' something to the other person and you intend for the other person to understand what it is you intend to communicate.

Frequently a person assumes that if they 'say what they mean to say', their responsibility for the communication is over. Effective communicators realise that their responsibility doesn't end when they finish talking. They realise that, for practical purposes, what they communicate is what the other person thinks they say and not what they intend to say. Often the two are quite different.

In communication it is important what the other person thinks you say and how they respond. This requires that the person pays attention to the response they are getting. If it is not the response they want, then they need to vary their own communication until they get the desired response.

There are several major sources of 'misunderstanding' in communication. The first arises from the fact that each person has a different life experience associated with each word in the language. Frequently, what one person means by a word (their complex equivalence for that word) may be something different from what another person means by it. The second misunderstanding arises from the failure to realise that a person's tone of voice and facial expression also communicate information, and that the other person may respond to these as much as they do to what is said. As the old saying goes: 'Actions speak louder than words,' and in NLP people are trained that when the two are in conflict, the person should pay more attention to the actions.

nlp presupposition 2 - map and territory

Good communicators realise that the representations they use to organise their experience of the world ('map') are not the world ('territory').

It is important to distinguish between several semantic levels. First there is the world. Second comes the person's experience of the world. This experience is the person's 'map' or 'model' of the world and is different for each person. Every individual creates a unique model of the world and thus lives in a somewhat different reality from everyone else. You do not operate directly on the world but on your experience of it. This experience may or may not be correct. To the extent that your experience has a similar structure to the world it is correct and this accounts for its usefulness.

A person's experience, map, model or representation of the world determines how they will perceive the world and what choices they will see as available to them. Many NLP techniques involve you changing your representation of the world to make it more useful and to bring it more into line with the way the world actually is.

nlp presupposition 3 - language and experience

Language is a secondary representation of experience.

Language is at a third semantic level. First is the stimulus coming from the word. Second is the person's representation of experience of that stimulus. Third is the person's description of that experience by way of language. Language is not experience but a representation of it. Words are merely arbitrary tokens used to represent things the person sees, hears or feels. People who speak other languages use different words to represent the same things that English speakers see, hear or feel. Also, since each person has a unique set of things that they have seen, heard and felt in their lives, their words have different meanings from each of them.

People are able to communicate effectively to the degree that these meanings are similar. When they are too dissimilar, problems in communication begin to arise.

nlp presupposition 4 - body and mind affect each other

Mind and body are parts of the same cybernetic system and affect each other. There is no separate 'mind' and no separate 'body'. Both words refer to aspects of the same 'whole' or 'gestalt', They act as one and they influence each other in such a way that there is no separation.

Anything that happens in one part of a cybernetic system, such as a human being, will affect all other parts of that system. This means that the way a person thinks affects how they feel and that the condition of their physical body affects how they think. A person's perceptual input, internal thought process, emotional process, physiological response and behavioural output all occur both simultaneously and through time.

In practical terms, this means that a person can change how they think either by directly changing how they think or by changing their physiology or other feelings. Likewise, a person can change their physiology or their emotions by changing how they think. One important corollary of this, which will be explored later, is the importance of visualisation and mental rehearsal in improving the conduct of any activity.

nlp presupposition 5 - widest range of behaviours or choices controls the system

Control in human systems refers to the ability to influence the quality of a person's own and other people's experience in the moment and through time.

The person with the greatest flexibility of behaviour - that is, the number of ways of interacting - will control the system. Choice is always preferable to no choice, and more choice is always preferable to less choice. This also relates to the third general principle of NLP, mentioned previously. This principle is that a person needs to vary their behaviour until they get their desired outcome. If what you are doing is not working, vary the behaviour and do something else. Anything else is better than continuing with what doesn't work. Keep varying your behaviour until you find something that works.

nlp presupposition 6 - behaviour and adaptation

Behaviour is geared towards adaptation. A person's behaviour is determined by the context in which that behaviour originates.

Your reality is defined by your perceptions of the world. The behaviour a person exhibits is appropriate to their reality. All of a person's behaviour, whether good or bad, is an adaptation. Everything is useful in some context. All behaviour is or was adaptive, given the context in which it was learned. In another context it may not be appropriate. People need to realise this and change their behaviour when it is appropriate to do so.

nlp presupposition 7 - present behaviour is the best choice

Behind every behaviour is a positive intent. A person makes the best choice available to them at any moment in time, given who the person is and based on all their life experiences and the choices they are aware of. If offered a better choice they will take it.

In order to change someone's inappropriate behaviour it is necessary to give them other choices. Once this is done they will behave accordingly. NLP has techniques for providing these additional choices. Also, in NLP we never take away choices. We only provide more choices and explicitly contextualise the existing choices.

nlp presupposition 8 - context of behaviour

You need to evaluate your behaviour in terms of what you are capable of becoming. You need to strive to become all that you are capable of being.

nlp presupposition 9 - resources to change

People have all they need to make changes they want to make. The task is to locate or access those resources and to make them available in the appropriate context. NLP provides techniques to accomplish this task.

What this means in practice is that people do not need to spend time trying to gain insight into their problems or in developing resources to deal with their problems. They already have all the resources they need to deal with their problems. All that is necessary is to access these resources and transfer them to the current time frame.

nlp presupposition 10 - the how of possibility

If any other human being is capable of performing some behaviour, then it is possible for you to perform it, too. The process of determining 'how' you do it is called 'modelling', and it is the process by which NLP came into being in the first place.

nlp presupposition 11 - behaviour speaks louder than words

Listen to what people say but pay more attention to what they do. If there is any contradiction between the two then rely on the behaviour. Look for behavioural evidence of change and don't just reply on people's words

nlp presupposition 12 - distinguish behaviour and self

It is useful to make a distinction between behaviour and self. In other words, just because someone 'screws up' on something it doesn't mean that they are a 'screw-up'. Behaviour is what a person says, does or feels at any moment in time. This is not a person's self, however. A person's self is greater than their behaviours.

nlp presupposition 13 - feedback, not failure

It is more valuable for a person to view their experience in terms of a learning frame than in terms of a failure frame. If a person doesn't succeed in something, that doesn't mean they have failed. It just means that they have discovered one way not to do that particular thing. The person then needs to vary their behaviour until they find a way to succeed.

nlp techniques and definitions

NLP consists of a set of powerful techniques to effect change. Some of these techniques are as follows, with their definitions:

anchoring

The process of associating an internal response with some external trigger so that the response may be quickly, and sometimes covertly, reaccessed by activating the trigger.

anchors

These may be naturally occurring or set up deliberately. They may be established in all representational systems and serve to control both positive and negative internal states.

stacking anchors

The process of associating a series of events with one specific anchor so as to strengthen the intensity of the subject's response to a specific anchor.

collapsing anchors

A process of neutralising negative states by triggering two incompatible responses at the same time.

chaining anchors

A process by which a series of anchors is created to lead from an undesired state through a series of intermediate states to a desired state.

associated state

Being fully present in a state so as to experience the kinesthetics of it. For past states this involves being in the experience looking from the perspective of the person's own eyes.

dissociated state

Recreating a past experience from the perspective of an onlooker or observer. This means the person does not re-experience the original emotion but instead experiences the emotions of an observer.

double kinesthetic dissociation

The process of watching yourself watching a film of a past experience. This is used in cases of phobias and extreme psychic trauma.

calibration

The process of reading a subject's internal responses in an ongoing interaction by pairing them with observable behavioural cues.

change history

A process of guiding a subject to re-experience a series of past situations by the use of selective anchoring. Resource states are developed for each situation and are installed in the subject's repertoire in order to change the significance of the past events.

rapport

The process of establishing a relationship with a subject that is characterised by harmony, understanding and mutual confidence. This is done by reducing to a minimum the perceived difference at the unconscious level.

reframing

A process used to separate a problematic behaviour from the positive intention to the internal part responsible for that behaviour. New choices of behaviour are established that maintain the positive intent but don't have the problematic by-products.

strategy

A set of explicit mental and behavioural steps used to achieve a specific outcome. This is represented by a specific sequence of representational systems used to carry out the specific steps.

submodalities

The subclassification of external experience. The decomposing into its components of a picture, sound or feeling.

This free NLP article is provided for this website by Robert Smith, and this is gratefully acknowledged. This material can be used freely for personal or organizational development purposes but is not to be sold or published in any form.

Robert Smith biography - Robert Smith MBA is a widely sought-after international consultant renowned for his enthusiastic motivational and forthright style. He is a Master Trainer of Neuro Linguistic Programming, specialising in leadership development and 'Solution Focused' consultancy. He has over 20 years experience developing leaders in a wide range of settings. Robert's early years of consultancy were mainly working for IBM in Europe, Middle East and Africa on their leadership development programmes. Robert has a remarkable skill set including being a psychotherapist (UKCP registered) and is able, by using the latest psychological methods, to help people remove limiting beliefs relating to achievement and success. Robert has worked with the Motorola MBA intake programme and trained the United Nations peacekeeping force in Bosnia. He also worked closely with the British Foreign Office and the British Armed Forces, and has worked with many of the top organizations in the world including Cable and Wireless, the Civil Aviation Authority, Solvay Pharmaceuticals, TNT and Alstom. In more recent years Robert Smith has become a highly respected international trainer enabling the development of trainers, coaches, consultants and organizational leaders, across more than 40 different nationalities. He now runs a training centre in Turkey as well as maintaining training and coaching activities in the UK.

Robert can be contacted via email: robert-smith at freeuk.com, and also via his website treaclenlptraining.co.uk.

Dreamer-and-Big-Dream [del.icio.us]

2009-06-28T04:18:44-07:00

Dream Big

APJ Abdul Kalam: [del.icio.us]

2009-06-09T20:40:23-07:00

APJ Abdul Kalam was among India's best-known scientists before he became the country's President. An alumnus of the Madras Institute of Technology, he worked for the Indian Space Research Organisation (ISRO) where he helped launch India's first satellites into orbit. Later, Kalam worked on developing missiles and other strategic weapons; he was widely regarded as a national hero for leading India's nuclear weapons tests in 1998. In 2002, Kalam was named the country's President, and he held that position until 2007. During the Wharton India Economic Forum in Philadelphia, Kalam spoke with India Knowledge@Wharton about his career as a scientist, his vision for India's future, and the most important traits for leaders, among other issues. An edited transcript of the interview follows:

Anger Management [del.icio.us]

2009-06-07T06:07:06-07:00

Why do you get Angry and How to Manage Anger. Six simple yet powerful tips for Anger Mangement

Dr.Wayne Dyre: Story of Shaya - Level of Gods Perfection [del.icio.us]

2009-06-04T09:37:35-07:00

Dr.Wayne Dyre

SWOT Analysis: A Lesson to Remember [del.icio.us]

2009-05-31T06:24:30-07:00

SWOT Analysis is an effective method of identifying your Strengths and Weaknesses, and to examine the Opportunities and Threats you face. Often carrying out an analysis using the SWOT framework will be enough to reveal changes which can be usefully made.

7 Laws of the Power of Intention from - Dr.Wayne Dyer

2009-03-02T09:46:00.000-08:00

7 Laws of the "Power of Intention" from Dr. Wayne Dyer

Dr. Wayne Dyer's in his book, The Power of Intention gave laws that defined the powers of intention as he saw it. Here is my interpretation of these laws that Dr. Dyer outlined.

1. The first law of intention is to recognize the face of creativity. Creativity in business is really about innovation and creating something from nothing using the power of your mind. Creativity is in you, whether you believe me or not.

2. The face of kindness is next. Any great power that can bring energy and thought into physical form must come out of kindness. In business,this is manifested with the power of positive thinking and an intent to do good. The law of reciprocity can only reward kind intentions.

3. The face of love conquers all, even in business. Think of this power of intention as the face of kindness exponentiation with the emotion of love. When you intend for your clients, vendors, employees and investors to grow and couple that with a lack of judgement, hate, anger or resentment -- more of what you want or desire in the business
relationship can manifest itself without impediment.

4. The face of beauty is truth, honesty and a knowing that what "is" -- is exactly as it should be. You can use this power by re-framing any negative thoughts you have towards others and replace them with an appreciate (a thankfulness attitude) towards them.

5. The face of expansion is next. This is the law and the power of spirit to help you expand your awareness of what is possible in your business life. Be open to the "knowings" that you have always had inside you that have quietly been guiding you. Listen to them. Whatever you think about expands and it is natural to expand. To deny this truth is to deny a part of your purpose here on Earth.

6. The face of unlimited abundance is one of my favorite laws that works in the power of intention or attraction. You were probably taught all of your life about limitations and about what is "not possible." Fortunately, this came from well-meaning people who believed in limitation and not abundance. This law does not require you to be intellectually perfect in order to receive the benefits. Believing in unlimited abundance has no downside, so why not take another look at your business life after you answer this question, "What if I could have it all?"

7. Lastly, the face of receptivity. The universal laws of intention are open to everyone and without any judgement. Consider the application of this principle is really about believing in yourself and your ability to be open to unlimited possibilities. Banish your doubts. Focus only on your positive intentions towards others and yourself to tap into this energy.

NLP Techniques, Decision Making with Time Line

2009-01-19T22:32:00.000-08:00

NLP Techniques, Decision Making with Time Line

“How to Make Good Decisions that you will Follow Through to Completion the Easy Way”

Colin G Smith - All Rights reserved
FREE NLP Techniques at The NLP ToolBox

So you’ve got some new ideas, goals and plans for the weeks, months and years ahead. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, ‘failing to plan is planning to fail’, so in this short article we are going to discover some Master-Keys to achieving effective outcomes.

Begin With the End in Mind

Choose one of the new outcomes you want and ask yourself the following question:

When you have what you want, what will you see, hear and feel?

Elicit Values

Now ask yourself, “And what’s important about that?”

Repeat this question several times on each answer to discover the deeper motivating values.

Amplify Your Desire to Achieve the Outcome!

Looking at your outcome picture as if it has been achieved begin to increase the size of the picture, make the colours brighter, enhance the colours, bring it in even closer.

That’s right! And imagine being able to perceive more depth in the image. You know make it more Three Dimensional; add more parallax.

Now with this motivating image in mind allow yourself to hear a congruent, motivating voice at the back of your head saying something encouraging.

Note: Tweaking these sensory components such as ’size of image’ are known as sub-modalities in NLP and you can find out much more in “The NLP ToolBox.”

Elicit Your Timeline

Have you ever wondered how your mind knows if a memory is from the recent past or the distant past?

Your mind has to somehow codify memories so it can differentiate between different dates and times.

Although man has been using concepts of time and timelines for centuries, it wasn’t until quite recently that we discovered that people actually map out time in their minds eye.

We all carry around a Timeline from which we access memories and resources and put new ones onto it.

To elicit your Timeline begin by remembering a time you brushed your teeth say 5 years ago.

Notice where that image is located in space. Actually point to it.

Good, now imagine brushing your teeth in the present and notice where you would place that image in space.

Finally imagine brushing your teeth 5 years from now. Allow yourself to become aware of where that image is located in space.

When you look at all three images at once you can imagine connecting a line between them.

So looking at your Timeline now, where is your birth located? And where is 25 years from now?

Great, you’ve just elicited your Timeline!

Discovering the Steps for the Desired Outcome

Here’s a cool thing. Bring to mind your Timeline again and now imagine placing it down and spreading it out across the floor.

So if you’re like me you will have your past going off to the left and your future will go off to the right like this:

|____________________|____________________|
Past Present Future

O
Meta Position

Now step off the Timeline into Meta Position. From this position, looking at the future, move the picture along the Timeline until it’s in a position that feels the most
achievable.

Now walk into that future position and associate fully into that ‘Desired Outcome’ picture.

See what you would see, hear what you would hear and allow that feeling of accomplishment to increase.

Amplify those good feelings even more by spinning the feeling up and down your body. Around and around, up and down faster and faster!!!

Keeping the feelings spinning turn around and look back towards the present. Notice what steps are required to achieve this outcome. Plan backwards from the future to the
Present Position.

Great! Now walk back into the Meta Position and notice any other steps or tweaks that are needed.

Back to the Present

Walk into the Present Position on your Timeline and notice all the steps that lead up to the Desired Outcome.

How’s that feel?

If needed you can of course cycle through the positions again to create a better plan.

Remember, earlier in this article, in the section titled, “Elicit Your Timeline,” you became aware of you actual Timeline that you ‘carry around in your head.’

So go ahead now and imagine the Timeline on the ground, with all the steps, rising up and fitting into your actual Timeline.

This will help to program the planning into your mind and if it’s possible get into action right away on the first step.

To boost your motivation from time to time you can step into the ‘Desired Outcome’ on your Timeline, remember your values for doing so, and feel those good feelings as you look back at the required steps.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Get Your FREE NLP Course!

It’s a five part NLP Personal Development Course, revealing Powerful Secrets to Boost Your Self-esteem, Increase Your Confidence and much more….

Including two sections on Timeline Secrets!

FREE NLP Course ==> The NLP ToolBox

Barack Obama - The Winning Lesson of Leadership

2009-01-16T19:39:00.000-08:00

Barack Obama And The Winning Lessons Of Leadership

View SlideShare presentation or Upload your own. (tags: books empower)

Quotations from Famous Presonalities

2008-12-21T18:45:00.000-08:00

Quotes From Famous Personalities To Remember

View SlideShare presentation or Upload your own. (tags: quotes love)

Reframing - The six steps proces

2008-12-18T23:17:00.000-08:00

Changing behaviours: Self-reframing using a spatial format

Sometimes people have difficulty changing behaviours that no longer appeal to them. Behaviours which are hard to change are often labelled 'habits'. Being able to change any behaviour you choose, when you choose, is a prerequisite to successful living. One effective way of changing behaviour, called reframing, is presented here in a spatial format.

Preparation

Mark out the following three 'positions' as circles on the floor, far enough apart to keep each one separate, and close enough to be able to move from one to another with ease. Mark one circle for 'behaviour', one for 'intent' and one for the 'creative state'.

Build yourself a 'creative state'.

Begin by standing outside the 'creative state' circle and think of a time when you were performing creatively according to your own standards. Note what you saw, heard and felt while reliving that experience. When the memory of your choice is strongly present as if it were happening to you now, step into the 'creative state' circle. Then step out of the space for the creative state, and leave the "creative state" that you have just re-lived, in that space. Keep adding other examples of creative states into the circle, one at a time, until the state in the circle feels strongly creative.

The Process

Stand in the circle that represents 'behaviour' and think of a behaviour that you would like to change, or you find limiting or habitual. Make sure that the behaviour is represented in one or more of the senses, in other words, imagine and/or hear and/or feel the behaviour.
Step back to the circle that represents 'intent', and as you do so ask the question, 'what is the intent, function or purpose of the behaviour?'. When you have a sense of the intent for the behaviour move into the 'creative state' circle.
Ask yourself 'how else can I fulfil the intent for the behaviour?'. While within the 'creative state' allow yourself to generate a range of alternative behaviours that fulfil the intent. When you have plenty of alternatives you can shift back to the circle for 'intent'.
Now you can review the alternatives and select the best three options. Step back into the circle for 'behaviour'.
Test out each of the three options one at a time by imagining using each new behaviour in the original context(s). Check are then any objections to any of the selected options? If so, step back into the circle for 'intent' and repeat the entire process, until all objections are satisfied.

Discussion

This format is based on what is known in the NLP community as a Six Step Reframe. Some students of NLP find difficulty when first learning to use the Six step Reframe on themselves. It requires the unaccompanied subject to split their attention between tracking their own internal states and running the process. To be able to do these tasks simultaneously requires some familiarity with the process.

This approach to six step reframing uses spatial sorting of the process into its components for ease of tracking while leaving the subject free to attend to their internal responses.

This spatial format allows you to use this process by yourself anytime you choose to. It is simply a matter of finding a suitable place where you can run through this process undisturbed.

There are other reframing processes as part of the NLP technology.

Changing behaviours - Self-reframing using a spatial format - Reference:

Collingwood, J.J.P., Collingwood, C.R.J. (2001). The NLP Field Guide; Part 1. A reference manual of Practitioner level patterns.

Brain Tracy: Eat that Frog

2008-12-18T18:47:00.000-08:00

There's an old saying that says..."If the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning is eat a live frog, then nothing worse can happen for the rest of the day!" Well, I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty safe assumption.

Brian Tracy, in his book Eat That Frog! says that your "frog" should be the most difficult item on your things to do list, the one where you're most likely to procrastinate; because, if you eat that first, it'll give you energy and momentum for the rest of the day. But, if you don't...and let him sit there on the plate and stare at you while you do a hundred unimportant things, it can drain your energy and you won't even know it.

So, here's your assignment: for the next 30 days take a look at your list, circle the frog, and eat that first.

Important is to keep the important - important.

NLP technique: Overcoming Fear, Worry, Anxiety

2008-12-15T23:17:00.000-08:00

NLP technique: Overcoming Fear/Worry/Anxiety

1. Think of something that you are frightened of or worrying about. Make it something where the feeling is unpleasant, you are not sure what to do, and the feeling is getting in the way of your effective action.

2. Imagine the situation and feel the feeling. Give it a label. It could be “fear”, “fright”, “anxiety” or “worry”.

3. Now imagine that feeling in front of you. Look at it with your mental vision. What does it look, feel and/or sound like?

a. Look
Colour:colour or black and white
Shape: Describe the figure
Depth: two or three dimensional
Size: large or small
Brightness: Bright or dark
Contrast: Well or poorly defined
Focus: Clear or blured
Movement: Still or moving
Speed: fast or slow
Location: up, down, front, left, right etc

b. Sound

Does it have a sound?
Verbal or non verbal: words or sound. If words, what is it saying?
Direction: Stereo or mono
Volume: loud or soft
Tone: Soft or harsh
Clarity: Clear or muffled
Pitch: high or low
Speed: fast or slow
Duration: continuous or discontinuous
Location: up, down, front, left, right etc

c. Feeling

Location: Where in the body is it located?
Texture: large or small
Weight: Light or heavy
Temperature: Hot or cold
Movement: Still or moving

3. Now let it stream past you. Let it go over you, under you, and around you. Let it go through you and as it does, it will become like a wisp of smoke.

4. As it streams around and through you, it will go behind you. Imagine that you can see I behind you disappearing faster and faster into the distance, until it melts into nothingness, as if it is being sucked down one of those enormous wind tunnels. There is nothing left. If you feel a little residue of the feeling, just put it in front of you again, face it, and repeat the process.

5. Now feel you body solid and grounded. You remain. You are not this feeling, because you can separate yourself from it.

Nick Vujicic: No arms No Legs - No Worries No Limits

2008-12-14T17:48:00.000-08:00

Hi! my name is Nick Vujicic

My name is Nick Vujicic and I give God the Glory for how He has used my testimony to touch thousands of hearts around the world! I was born without limbs and doctors have no medical explanation for this birth "defect". As you can imagine, I was faced with many challenges and obstacles.

"Consider it pure joy, my Brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds."

....To count our hurt, pain and struggle as nothing but pure joy? As my parents were Christians, and my Dad even a Pastor of our church, they knew that verse very well. However, on the morning of the 4th of December 1982 in Melbourne (Australia), the last two words on the minds of my parents was "Praise God!". Their firstborn son had been born without limbs! There were no warnings or time to prepare themselves for it. The doctors were shocked and had no answers at all! There is still no medical reason why this had happened and Nick now has a Brother and Sister who were born just like any other baby.

The whole church mourned over my birth and my parents were absolutely devastated. Everyone asked, "if God is a God of Love, then why would God let something this bad happen to not just anyone, but dedicated Christians?" My Dad thought I wouldn't survive for very long, but tests proved that I was a healthy baby boy just with a few limbs missing.

Understandably, my parents had strong concern and evident fears of what kind of life I'd be able to lead. God provided them strength, wisdom and courage through those early years and soon after that I was old enough to go to school.

The law in Australia didn't allow me to be integrated into a main-stream school because of my physical disability. God did miracles and gave my Mom the strength to fight for the law to be changed. I was one of the first disabled students to be integrated into a main-stream school.

I liked going to school, and just try to live life like everyone else, but it was in my early years of school where I encountered uncomfortable times of feeling rejected, weird and bullied because of my physical difference. It was very hard for me to get used to, but with the support of my parents, I started to develop attitudes and values which helped me overcome these challenging times. I knew that I was different but on the inside I was just like everyone else. There were many times when I felt so low that I wouldn't go to school just so I didn't have to face all the negative attention. I was encouraged by my parents to ignore them and to try start making friends by just talking with some kids. Soon the students realized that I was just like them, and starting there God kept on blessing me with new friends.

There were times when I felt depressed and angry because I couldn't change the way I was, or blame anyone for that matter. I went to Sunday School and learnt that God loves us all and that He cares for you. I understood that love to a point as a child, but I didn't understand that if God loved me why did He make me like this? Is it because I did something wrong? I thought I must have because out of all the kids at school, I'm the only weird one. I felt like I was a burden to those around me and the sooner I go, the better it'd be for everyone. I wanted to end my pain and end my life at a young age, but I am thankful once again, for my parents and family who were always there to comfort me and give me strength.

Due to my emotional struggles I had experienced with bullying, self esteem and loneliness, God has implanted a passion of sharing my story and experiences to help others cope with whatever challenge they have in their life and let God turn it into a blessing. To encourage and inspire others to live to their fullest potential and not let anything get in the way of accomplishing their hopes and dreams.

One of the first lessons that I have learnt was not to take things for granted.

"And we know that in all things God works for the best for those who love Him."

That verse spoke to my heart and convicted me to the point where that I know that there is no such thing as luck, chance or coincidence that these "bad" things happen in our life.

I had complete peace knowing that God won't let anything happen to us in our life unless He has a good purpose for it all. I completely gave my life to Christ at the age of fifteen after reading John 9. Jesus said that the reason the man was born blind was "so that the works of God may be revealed through Him." I truly believed that God would heal me so I could be a great testimony of His Awesome Power. Later on I was given the wisdom to understand that if we pray for something, if it's God's will, it'll happen in His time. If it's not God's will for it to happen, then I know that He has something better.

I now see that Glory revealed as He is using me just the way I am and in ways others can't be used.

I am now twenty-one years old and have completed a Bachelor of Commerce majoring in Financial Planning and Accounting. I am also a motivational speaker and love to go out and share my story and testimony wherever opportunities become available. I have developed talks to relate to and encourage students through topics that challenge today's teenagers. I am also a speaker in the corporate sector.

I have a passion for reaching out to youth and keep myself available for whatever God wants me to do, and wherever He leads, I follow.

I have many dreams and goals that I have set to achieve in my life. I want to become the best witness I can be of God's Love and Hope, to become an international inspirational speaker and be used as a vessel in both Christian and non-Christian venues. I want to become financially independent by the age of 25, through real estate investments, to modify a car for me to drive and to be interviewed and share my story on the "Oprah Winfrey Show"! Writing several best-selling books has been one of my dreams and I hope to finish writing my first by the end of the year. It will be called "No Arms, No Legs, No Worries!"

I believe that if you have the desire and passion to do something, and if it's God's will, you will achieve it in good time. As humans, we continually put limits on ourselves for no reason at all! What's worse is putting limits on God who can do all things. We put God in a "box". The awesome thing about the Power of God, is that if we want to do something for God, instead of focusing on our capability, concentrate on our availability for we know that it is God through us and we can't do anything without Him. Once we make ourselves available for God's work, guess whose capabilities we rely on? God's!

"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."

Dr.John C Maxwell - Travel through Life

2008-08-10T19:02:00.000-07:00

Here are Tips from Dr. John C. Maxwell, recognized Leadership expert, where he gave 10 solid tips for traveling through life.

Traveling Through Life – Dr.John C. Maxwell

Tip #1: Travel Light. - You can always tell the difference between an experienced traveler and a new one… by the size of their luggage. John mentioned that too many people travel through life with a lot of emotional baggage, which they’ve not yet learned to let go.

Traveling light is about finding your priorities… carrying only the essential stuff… Oh yes… and asking for forgiveness along the way.

Tip #2: Take someone with you - Life is about relationships. Isn’t it awfully lonely to travel through life alone?

Maybe you’ve been hurt before, but that doesn’t mean that you should close your heart. It only means that you know the characteristics you don’t want in a partner/friend.Let time heal your heart and then find someone to travel through life with.

Tip #3: Follow The Road Map - Have a game plan. If you do not know where you are going, then how can you hope to get there?

It is important to know where you are (A) by doing self-reflection everyday and where you want to go (B) by setting goals… but do not succumb to “destination disease”. Life is not only about reaching B. Life HAPPENS between A and B! Enjoy the journey…

Tip #4: Take The High Road -”Those who are instruments of grace to others become recipients of grace to themselves”.

John talks about the necessity of having a life stance - your overall frame of reference - your attitude, assumptions and expectations of yourself, others around you and life.

Taking the high road means that you do not keep score. You learn to forgive others and do your best to help the people around you.

Tip #5: Stop And Ask For Directions -Most people are too stubborn or proud to do that. They would rather go around in circles than stop to ask someone for directions.

Remember that no matter the direction you are heading, it’s very likely that someone else has already been there and done that. Be prepared to ask for advice… and shortcut your learning curve.

Tip #6: Make A U-Turn When Needed -”Life is the art of drawing without an eraser.” You can’t turn back time when you have made a mistake… but you can change directions and make a U-turn before it’s too late.

Sometimes, we may find ourselves headed into a dead end… the sooner we realize we have to make a change and do it, the more likely we will find ourselves back on a safe route.

Remember… not changing when you have to may lead to death!

Tip #7: Appreciate The Detours - Life is not a smooth one way street. Along the way, you will meet obstacles and challenges. Appreciate and learn to take the detours.

I love the way John reframed “Problems”. He said that problems are…

Predictors

Reminders

Opportunities

Blessings

Lessons

Everywhere

Messages

Solvable

Could you see how that can be really empowering?

Tip #8: Take Pictures - Create Memories.

John suggests that you should….

Work like you don’t need the money

Dance like no one is watching

Sing like no one is listening

Love like you’ve never been hurt

Live like it’s heaven on earth

How beautiful is that?

Tip #9: Travel The Extra Mile - And then some…Who knows what you would find in that extra mile? Another adventure… A beautiful sight… A lovely encounter… An enchanting lover…

Go the extra mile… it may be worth the whole journey.

Tip #10: Stop To Smell The Roses - Remember not to rush though life… Take some time out to appreciate its beauty… Enjoy the butterflies’ dance… and last but not least, be grateful… for everyone and everything in your life.

Introduction of NLP

2008-08-05T05:19:00.000-07:00

Neuro Linguistic Programing

Let us tell you a story about magic. It's a magical story, full of wows! And woes. It's a story of magicians and wizards and frogs turning into princes. It's an adventure into the very magic that occurs everyday in human neuro-linguistics, a story about you and the magic that's going on this very minute in your neurology.

What we call NLP is really the story of a new cutting-edge model about--

* How to run your own brain.

* How to effectively represent your experiences.

* How to map the world of experiences that you've been through, that you think is possible to experience, and that you hope you will get to experience.

* How to take charge of your states.

* How to develop effective strategies for your everyday life.

Now what we call, "the magic," is simply the highest and best of human experiences, "excellence" in human functioning. And the magic of that magic is this: there is rhyme and reason to your everyday experiences.

In NLP, we say, the magic has structure. Above and beyond the details and content of any experience-- there is a framework that explains how it operates. And when you know that, you know many of the secrets of magic.

Magic?

Yes, the magic of getting over past hurts, the magic of forging a great big compelling future and making it happen, the magic of implementing your knowledge, the magic of getting into rapport with others, working through conflicts, taking another person's point of view on things, etc.

We use the term "magic" in NLP to speak about the very structure and experience of excellence. So when anybody does something in a superb and wonderful way-- from learning, decision making, staying motivated, being resilient, operating proactively, managing, making wealth, selling, etc., we know that that experience has structure and that we can learn and replicate that magic.

And that's what NLP is all about.

The Letters-- The Letters

Okay, okay, the set of letters themselves. NLP literally stands for a mouth-full of a phrase: Neuro-Linguistic Programming. This refers to the fact It means that we have a mind-body system that we can program very much the way we can program software for a computer.

This mind-body system or our neuro-linguistics is made up of our neurology (our nervous systems that enables us to live, breathe, think, and function) and our linguistics (the symbol systems that run the neurology).

Put mind-body together-- the linguistics of neurology and we have a marvelous, mysterious and even magical human bio-computer. And the best news-- it's programmable. Sure, it's hard-wired with a few basic dispositions, but for the most part, "as we think (symbolize, give meaning to things), so we are." And with that, the adventure begins.

How?

What do you mean?

We mean that if you don't have a great strategy for making friends, learning, staying healthy, looking at the world with the eyes of opportunities, etc., then you just need a strategy.

You work perfectly well. There's nothing wrong with you. You may simply not have the right strategy for the job, or you may have some stupid strategy running your programs of thinking, feeling, speaking, and behaving that's getting in the way.

NLP, as a model of human functioning, takes a very different attitude from some of the old psychologies. In NLP, we do not start from the assumption (and what an assumption it is!) that people are broken. No. Instead, we assume the opposite-- that people work perfectly well, that they have all the resources that they need, and that the only problem isn't with them, but with their programming.

The Sources

If that sounds familiar and similar to other fields, it is. NLP is a branch of the Cognitive Sciences and Cognitive Behavioral Psychology. It grew out of General Semantics (Korzybski), Transformational Grammar (Noam Chomsky), Anthropology and Cybernetics (Bateson), Reframing (Watzalawick, et al.), Family Systems (Virginia Satir), Gestalt Therapy (Perls), Medical hypnosis (Milton Erickson), and several related studies. This is most of the respectable body of knowledge from which NLP arose.

The Founders

To understand the story of how NLP came to be, you have to understand the times of the early 1970s in America and specifically in California. In a time of social upheaval, Vietnam War protests, drugs and rock-n-roll, a young college student happened upon the work of Fritz Perls and then Virginia Satir and found that he could mimic their high-level therapy skills to a degree that surprised him.

So he got a young college professor of linguistics to help him figure it out and supervise a class and suddenly they both were replicating the skills that were supposed to be graduate therapy skills.

So the student (Richard Bandler) and the professor (Dr. John Grinder) teamed up to see if they could figure out (or model) the magic of these therapeutic wizards. So there on the campus of the University of California at Santa Cruz, Bandler used what he knew about patterns in mathematics and computers and Grinder used what he knew about patterns in linguistics to create a model about the Perls and Satir model-- a meta-model ("meta" is Greek for "above, beyond, and about).

Bandler's natural gift for mimicking enabled him to hear and replicate the language patterns by Virginia and Fritz. So he play acted with a group of students to see what he could do.

After enjoying immediate and powerful results from this initial modeling, Richard and John set out to model the hypnotic skills of Milton Erickson. And it so happened that he and Dilts and others of the original group were taking classes from Gregory Bateson at the University who not only introduced them to Erickson, but to other influential persons.

Within two years, they produced the original NLP books--

The Structure of Magic, Volumes I and II

The Patterns of the Hypnotic Language of Erickson, Vol. I & II

And that's how it began.

They built a communication model about human "thinking" and "processing" and used that model of how we see images, hear sounds, reproduces smells and tastes and touches in our mind to track and model the structure of subjective experiences.

NLP-- The Study of Excellent Experiences

Robert Dilts was soon commissioned to write the first scholarly book on NLP. He entitled it, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Volume I: The Study of the Structure of Subjectivity. This set forth NLP as a model and the key features of the model.

For example, NLP speaks about "thinking"-- or information processing as the reproducing in the mind the sensory components of what we see, hear, smell, taste, and touch with our sense receptors. This is known as the Representational Systems, the VAK systems and these stand for the way or the "modes" by which we represent information:

Visual (Eyes) - for the Pictures, Sights, Images

Auditory (Ears) - for the Sounds, noises, tones, volumes

Kinesthetic (skin/body) - for the sensations, touch, pressure, etc.

When we think about something, anything, we encode our "thoughts" using our "senses." So we speak about our sensory systems or modalities. This makes our "thoughts" much more specific.

Think about your home or apartment. Got it?

* What does it look like?

* Sound like? Any noises or sounds associated in your picture?

* What about smells?

Here's an "Thought Experiment" that we have in the book, User's Manual for the Brain. Try it out. Have you ever experienced anything that you would call "pleasant?"

Recall a pleasant experience from your past. As various things may pop into your mind, just allow yourself to go with some pleasure memory for the moment and allow yourself to go with that thought....

As you experience this pleasant memory, notice its visual aspects. What do you see? Notice the images. Now make the picture larger. Let it double in size... and then let that picture double again... Notice what happens. Do your emotions intensify?

Now shrink the picture. Make it smaller and smaller. Allow it to become so small you can hardly see it... Stay with that a moment... Do the intensity of the feelings decrease? Experiment again with making the picture bigger and then smaller.

When you make it smaller, do your feelings decrease? And when you make it larger, do your feelings increase? If so, then running the pictures (sounds, feelings) in your awareness in this way functions as it does for most people. However, you may have a different experience.

Did you? No big deal. We all code our experiences in our minds uniquely and individually. Now, put your picture of that pleasant experience back in a format where you find it most comfortable and acceptable.

As you maintain the same picture, move the picture closer to you. Just imagine that the picture begins to move closer and closer to you, and notice that it will. What happens to your feelings as it does? ... Move the picture farther away.

What happens when you move the picture farther away? Do your feelings intensify when you move the picture closer? Do your feelings decrease when you move the picture farther away? Notice that as you change the mental representation in your mind of the experience, your feelings change. This, by the way, describes how we can "distance" ourselves from experiences, does it not?

Now experiment with the color. Are your pictures in color or in black-and-white? If your pictures have color, make them black-and-white, and vice versa if you have them coded as black-and-white . . . When you changed the color, do your feelings change?

What about the focus of your images? Are they in focus or out of focus? Do you see an image of yourself in the picture or do you experience the scene as if looking out of your own eyes?

What about the quality of your images: in three dimensional (3D) form or flat (2D)? Does it have a frame around it or do you experience it as panoramic? Experiment by changing how you represent the experience. Change the location of the picture. If you have it coded as on your right, then move it to your left.

Playing with the Brain

Did you like that playing with your brain? The neat thing about playing with our brains in that way is that as we change our coding, we change our feelings. The neurology of our emotions responded to the linguistics (or symbols) of our brain. When we change various features of our representations, it affected our responses.

This describes, in part, how "the magic" of NLP works. As we work with the very structures and processes of representation, rather than content, we change the programming. In the Thought Experiment, you might have changed how you feel by changing the quality and structure of your images. Amazing, is it not?

And when you know the structure of experience, then we can begin to use that knowledge to create more generative processes for improving life all around. What would happen if you made all your unpleasant pictures small, dim, and far away? What would happen if you made all your pleasant experiences big, bright and up close?

To learn to play with your brain and make it do wild and wonderful things, to run it for fun and profit, to induce the kind of positive states of mind-and-body, emotional states and states of value and belief, you only need to understand some of the basic components and how they work.

The VAK Representational Systems-- Sights, Sounds, Sensations, Smells, etc.

These are the basic components.

Each of these have certain Audio-Visual components. Think of a TV or Radio and we have volume, tone, pitch, location, etc. We have distance (close/ far), clarity (clear/ fuzzy), dimension (3_D or flat and 2_D), etc. The NLP term for these qualities or distinctions is "sub-modalities."

Perceptual Positions-- the point of view that you take in thinking about something: your own (first person), another person's (second position), the point of view of the larger system (third position).

Running Your Own Brain

In the past 25 years, hundreds of techniques (the NLP technology) has arisen that provide step-by-step processes for "running your own brain" to produce outstanding results. There are patterns for effecting lasting change with phobias and trauma (the Phobia Cure pattern), for changing long-term habits (the Swish Pattern), for changing old traumatic reactions to memories (Decision Destroyer), for altering meaning (Reframing patterns),

NLP does indeed offer a fairly large toolbox of techniques. And it is it more than that. Co-founder, Richard Bandler has said,

"NLP is an attitude and a methodology that leaves behind a trail of techniques."

The attitude of NLP involves one of intense and excited curiosity. It involves the desire to know what goes on behind the scenes. With this kind of attitude of curiosity, we want to know what makes the human mind work. So NLP runs on an attitude of experimentation.

This attitude leads us to try all kinds of things. After all, we do not sort for "failure," but only for "feedback." If we find that something doesn't produce the results we want, we just try something else. When you get the attitude or spirit of NLP, you'll experience a wild and wonderful passion for exploration, experimentation, and innovating. It will make you more creative, more open to the world of possibilities, and more of a pioneer.

The methodology of NLP is that of modeling: coping and mimicking how something works

Chetan Bhagat...Keep the Spark

2008-07-27T08:48:00.000-07:00

Keep the Spark

Inaugural Speech for the new batch at the Symbiosis BBA program 2008

Good Morning everyone and thank you for giving me this chance to speak to you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this college, leaving the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my new classmates - there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.

Where do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-year old twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut their own birthday cake.

I see students like you, and I still see some sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the spark?

Imagine the spark to be a lamp’s flame. The first aspect is nurturing - to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to guard against storms.

To nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is possible for you. It isn’t any external measure - a certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.

Most of us are from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement.

But it isn’t the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr Ambani would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore. Steve Jobs won’t be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come to work everyday?

They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that next level is important.

Nature designed with a random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature’s design. Are you? Goals will help you do that.

I must add, don’t just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.

There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school. Where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One last thing about nurturing the spark - don’t take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the yoga practice. The teacher said - don’t be serious, be sincere. This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It’s ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.

I’ve told you three things - reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.

Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don’t go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you.

But it’s life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember - if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that’s where you want to be.

Disappointment’s cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don’t know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release.

Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning how to write scripts , having a side plan – I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life - friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.

Unfairness - this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it – not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people luckier than you.

In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and understand this speech in English means you are pretty darn lucky by Indian standards. Let’s be grateful for what we have and get the strength to accept what we don’t. I have so much love from my readers that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don’t get literary praise. It’s ok. I don’t look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It’s ok. Don’t let unfairness kill your spark.

Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.

There you go. I’ve told you the four thunderstorms - disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.

I welcome you again to the most wonderful years of your life. If someone gave me the choice to go back in time, I will surely choose college. But I also hope that ten years later as well, you eyes will shine the same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark alive, not only through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I hope not just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something cool about saying - I come from the land of a billion sparks.

Thank You.