arbit fundaes

the general theory of racism

2009-10-31T12:12:00.004+05:30

No one is new to racism in this world. Many must have experienced the ugly treatment, and it would not be politically correct for anyone to take sides with the racist. But the truth is that in India, we are fed daily doses of racism in the form of fairness cream ads on the TV. Going by an ad, a girl has to be fair to be playing tennis; how fair is that. If there are people raising ridiculous voices for calling a barber a barber, why has not anyone done so against money-making products exploiting the same gullible people.

But that's not all there is to it.

I call it racism for the absence of a more appropriate word, but it's nothing more than discrimination. Discrimination between two persons, two objects, two anything, when there's nothing really fundamental that rates one above the other. The two things are different, that's it. He is white, i am not. He grows a beard, i do not. How and why does one compare the two? And it's not just human beings that such things apply to. The number one victim of such a discrimination is i would say the night. All poets across all countries have likened the day to hope and good, while the night is sad and evil. (One could, but i would rather not, steer towards classifying things as good and bad, but instead would use the prevailing simple ideas.) Even amongst the nights, a new moon is supposed to be inauspicious, but a full moon is beautiful. Now you can see, where the bias in favour of the white skin comes from. Severely skewed sex ratio in several parts of our country is a testimony to the 'racism' being applied to not only colour of the skin but also to gender of the children. But is it obviously not fair. All the people, the day, the night, moonless or otherwise are created by the same entity, let's call it nature rather than God, then how could it be that one is better than the other. If one were really better than the other, won't nature be blamed of elitism, and then that would be a very hard thing to digest.

Again that's not all there is to it, and this one affects our lives more closely.

Say, someone likes apples, and someone else oranges. Even in such mundane matters, some people tend to become very opinionated, and then the person loving apples would say with a lot conviction that he does not like oranges at all. It's then funny yet sad to see the orange-lover get offended, and go on narrating the benefits of his favourite fruit. Why not let the other person love his apples peacefully, and go buy oranges for oneself. And where also is the need to deny people from liking their oranges? One could look around and see such stuff going on everywhere. Things grow to unruly levels, and with disturbing frequency, if one replaces the fruit one likes with the god one worships or the language one speaks or the clothes one wears or the music one listens to. It's not like i have an answer for all of the world's problems, but even on a much smaller scale, where your interaction is limited to a relatively smaller number of people, taking such things at face value would contribute towards reducing a bit of friction in our lives.

You can observe some commonalities across all the things in which such racism is prevalent. The fairer and bigger is in most of the cases supposed to be better than the darker and smaller. Maybe it's wired into our brains, because what makes the first impression on an interviewer's mind is the colour of the candidate's skin, so i was told before our campus placements. I think it's a notion that has carried itself -- and spilt over in other areas -- from the olden times. It was unwise then, and hence bad, to venture out after dark; when you couldn't take your survival for granted, you obviously had to be stronger than the others. Such things were on a very local level, and they changed drastically once you crossed an ocean or two. For in that foreign land survival might have required you to be on the shorter side. When the world was connected several centuries ago, when peoples came face to face with each other, they failed to shed those notions from their minds, and it gave rise to a feeling of superiority (and inferiority). But we humans as conscious beings, i believe, can certainly overcome the wired emotion. For example, they say, the basic aim of all the species is to increase its number. If again we were to follow that instict, the world would be a worse place (than it already is) to live in.

come, fall in love with a demon!

2009-02-11T15:25:00.018+05:30

There are several people i know who adore Andaz Apna Apna as if it were there own child. I also have personal list of a few such movies (and a couple of books as well). You can start anywhere and end anywhere. There's nothing in the movie you don't know, rather every line and every twist is known to you. Yet on no occasion does the movie fail to entertain you to a degree that doesn't diminish with time. A few days ago, i watched such a movie, worhty to be included in the category above: The Exorcist.
(I don't know if this can be called a film review, but it does contain plenty of spoilers.)
There are mainly two things which make this movie stand out from the rest of the horror movies made. First is the manner in which the scary factor of this movie is presented. It does not involve some slithery slimy beast or a creepy zombie, who would attack the protagonist from behind when s/he would least expect. Instead it has a demon in the body of 12 year old girl who would deliver a hard smack right across the face. And the second one is the memorable conversations that the younger of the two priests has with the demon. At times what the demon says seems horrifying, as well as a bit amusing. Whoever thought of adding humour to a hardcore horror flick! The point where the demon imitates an answering-machine reply: 'Your mother's in here Karras. Would you like to leave a message? I'll see that she gets it.' is an astounding piece of dialogue. I would never think twice before voting for it to be included in a list of all-time favourite quotes., if there ever is such a poll. Also wonderful is the quote, 'What an excellent day for an exorcism.', again coming from the demon. This is at the time when Karras and the demon are having a chat, man-to-man.
What makes the movie a sucees is the superbly true demon. The demon should indeed be called the protagonist of the movie, but alas, civic sensibilities won't allow that. Due credit should to be given to Linda Blair who plays the possessed girl, and of course her make-up artist. The vastly numerous profanities alone wouldn't have been central to make the movie thoroughly enjoyable, but they positively add glamour to the movie.

Having said everything i could in praise of the movie, i do harbour a serious complaint against the movie. Even though the possessed form calls itself the Devil, other characters say it is only the demon claiming to be the Devil itself. Why was the form shown to be content with calling itself a demon? Given the scale of the blasphemous content, in the movie, it is difficult to comprehend that portrayal of the Devil could have made things any worse. If you can show Jesus why not the Devil? Nothing would have changed, other than the identify of the form as the Devil proper. I know little about Christianity, but after watching this movie, i had a feeling -- and i may be entirely wrong -- that in a way the Devil is more sacred than the God.

the apt Gangaram

2009-01-21T20:55:00.015+05:30

What all things can you think of when you hear Gangaram?
There are quite a few already who go by this name. One is a Marathi movie titled Ram Ram Gangaram, starring Dada Kondke et al. I haven't seen that one, but you can't miss getting some idea, regards the content of the movie, by just knowing the actor. Next comes a shoe shop by the same name in Udaipur. It is a crap place which i would recommend only if all other shoe shops in Udaipur and neighbouring cities are shut down. If you discount a break in the syllable, there's also a hospital in Delhi by the name Ganga Ram, and as far as i have heard about it, it's got the best the capital has to offer in terms of medical facilities; so what if it has to share its name with one of Dada Kondke's movies.
What else?
The occasion was a fair in the city, held every December, where you can choose from among a myriad of things to gift someone. You can see paintings, wall-hangings, furniture, leather goodies, thick carpets with prices running into five figures, and what not; and a plethora of diverse and dazzling performances coming from all corners of the country. At the same place there was an enclosure from which a microphone-equipped man was luring the passers-by into witnessing some outstanding powers of a donkey. And guess what was the name of the donkey; yup you guessed it right, it was Gangaram.
So i paid ten bucks to enter the enclosure, which was basically a simple tent. It's one good thing about roaming all alone, you don't need to consult anyone before changing your path abruptly (a one-line digression à la Chetan Bhagat). In the middle there was the host, and all the people who were tempted like me, formed a circle around him. First up, using his hands to close the donkey's eyes, the host asked for someon'e watch and told a girl to keep the watch. I was not impressed much when Gangaram went and stood next to exactly the same girl when asked to. That must be some regular girl, thought i. But as the show progressed, i could see there was indeed something. Like when the host asked Gangaram to point out a man wearing spectacles; lo and behold, that ass moved a full circle and stopped near me. I was so astounded, that i couldn't stop myself from fondling Gangaram, falling short of only a peck. I looked around to see if there were many men wearing spects, but there was only one: i. A few more of such Qs and As followed.
It's obvious that there was some terrifically imperceptible coding system in place between the host and his pal. Either that or the donkey is really an extraordinary animal, who not only understands the question but also is intelligent enough to answer those.
That's Gangaram for you, an apt one at that.

'gimme a break mate!'

2009-01-06T15:22:00.006+05:30

Almost every other day, you can find someone or the other writing, either through newspapers or blogs or some online article, on the Australian cricket team's poor current performance. Now, there's one more to the list.
People are bashing these guys right, left and centre for their poor tactics with the the bat, the ball, and in the field. They are writing pages on how Australia should have planned better, given that the retirements of McGrath and Warne were round the corner, and how the selectors should have used some more of their discretionary powers.
I agree, everything that they say is fine. Australia are playing cricket at a level that is nowhere close to the what they played a few years ago. In the past 10 years' period, no one is used to seeing Australia fight despearately to save a Test on the last day, except on a few occasions, you know against whom; but in their own backyard -- naaah!
But come on, think of it! What else do you expect? Australia has been at the top almost for a decade now. I am not much into statistics myself, but you can put appropriate filters at cricinfo statsguru and check it for yourself. And now it's only natural that they are being replaced. How interesting would cricket be left if Australia does another hat-trick of World Cups? I, for sure, won't love it. But that does not imply that Australia has to take flak for that.
I daresay that there's little difference between being vicarious and bashing the Aussies for there current run. It can be, at times, equated with sadism. Australia is not used to attract any sympathy in recent times, but i don't want to be a sympathiser either, for i fear the i-told-you-so attitude.
So what's up for the Aussies now? Ponting for sure can't do anything better than keep his mouth shut. If he does otherwise, he's sure to receive more from the same people. But i would be very heartened to see him open his mouth and scream at the top of his voice, 'Gimme a break mate!'

Bansi baby

2008-10-20T23:25:00.003+05:30

It's been more than a year that i am in the land of camels, Rajasthan, yet i rode this animal for the first time only yesterday. I was with a friend roaming around a popular tourist centre in Udaipur, a place i must have passed by 50 times if not more, where you can emjoy a camel ride.
I had a strange feeling as i mounted the camel, thinking that i will be riding not my regular motorcycle, but an animal, a living animal. With both of us on top of the camel, for a moment it felt we would be landing straight on our noses from a 10 feet as the camel got up, first on its hind legs and then the front ones. We came to know that the camel was named Bansi, but i aint sure if that means a male or a female, it didn't strike me then to enquire more about it; must be a male though, not sure.
It indeed felt like the camel ride that they have at Essel World as Bansi strode leisurely. As i was adjusting myself to the bumpy ride, i felt, for only a few minutes, like walking in the shoes of those who have to travel miles together on a camel. I read somwhere recently that the Indian army near the Pakistan border maintains a fleet of 700 camels.
As we finished our ride, we had some small talk with the kid taking care of Bansi. I was curious to know if Bansi was able to tell this kid from others, and he said he could. It was a beautiful animal indeed, and i could see this kid liked him very much from the hug he gave to his dear pet. A camel need not be as handsome as a stallion or an Alsatian, but it is a good pet, nonetheless. In fact, i think any mammal, for that matter, would be a good candidate for a pet, but am not sure if an iguana can tell its master from a stranger.

speaking tree

2008-05-23T20:25:00.011+05:30

It's the daily column on the edit page of ToI. Now to be really frank, ToI, i don't think, is a great newspaper. Especially this Ahmedabad edition, where everyday on the front page you will find a news where some Gujju has achieved something. It's a newspaper's duty to publish such events, but ToI, Ahmedabad, i feel is highly biased in such matters. The Speaking Tree, on the other hand, has no such regional issues; yet, i have borne a prejudice against this article, thinking that it always carries heavily loaded, un-understandable philosophical or moral stuff.
But today's article was quite entertaining to read. It has a thought in it that made me smile gently, instantly. The writer asks why don't we blame the fire if it spreads accidentally and causes damage. Or why don't we question a person who's admiring beauty of the Moon on a clear night. It's because, he says, it is natural; a fact about such things that we have understood very well, accepted fully, and learnt to live with. In what follows, the writer furthers the thought where he replaces fire and the Moon with people. He proposes that learning to accept people as they are, and by not having too many or over-ambitious expectations from them, will help us live our lives more happily. Now the thing about such arguments is that if put in sweet words, they look pretty convincing to me. So much so, that several times, both the the 'View' and the 'Counter-View' -- again from ToI's edit page -- seem equally appealing. But in the present case, one can immediately ask if that implies that we should mutely accept even the ill things around us, and not do anything about it? Well, he doesn't dwell on that, but giving him the benefit of doubt, i would say he implies no such thing.
But that's not the point at all i want to emphasize upon. I aint sure if it struck many to question fire as to why does it burn things down? You can put a thousand scientific fundaes explaining the properties of fire, but there can always be a final unanswerable 'why'.
It feels nice to read such things, gives me a reason to post regularly. Speaking Tree is, after all, not such a bore. As for ToI, it's somewhat like orkut, you know it's no good, stuff it has doesn't have great value, but still you go for it everyday.
Old habits, dude, ...

cool dude

2008-04-12T17:19:00.006+05:30

Everyone must have enjoyed the recent thriller of a match between West Indies and Sri Lanka, if not the entire match, at least the highlights (like i did). Shivnarine Chanderpaul rose to the occasion, and the guy who is known to sitck to the wicket till the end of the innings in a Test, proved that he could as well do it in an ODI and snatch victory.
However, there was one more player who amazed me equally, if not to a greater extent. And that was West Indian captain Chris Gayle displaying a sedate demeanour during the final moments of the match. Towards the end of WI innings, as the hosts were getting closer and closer to the target with wickets falling in rapid succession, the camera frequently pointed at Gayle, and someone unaware of the state of the match, might have thought that he has just woken up from slumber. He was not biting his nails sitting on the edge of the chair like Ganguly used to do; neither was he chewing a gum and getting restless like Ponting does. Slouched in his seat, he was watching the proceedings carried out at the wicket with cold eyes. Didn't he want WI to win the match? Of course, he wanted to! As an opener he had scored 52 and played his part very well.
Was he indifferent to the result of the game?
Well, i can not say with surety anything about that, but it looked like he very much followed what a great guy had instructed his student about one's efforts and its fruits, on a battlefield a few thousand years ago.

the right way?

2008-03-30T18:57:00.004+05:30

I was a tad disappointed seeing that i hadn't got a window seat in the bus even after asking the ticket vendor to get me one. It was a pretty comfortable bus, one in which you wouldn't mind taking a five hour long journey. The man sitting next to me looked like he had skipped the daily bath. It was only when the conductor came asking for tickets, that i came to know that this person didn't have a ticket with him. He had a letter from some acquaintance which he had assumed was enough to give him a free journey on the bus. The TC suggested that he should buy a ticket, but he was not exactly insisting him to do so. In reply, this guy mildly offered the TC about two thirds the ticket price as a bribe, which he declined softly.
Later as the number of passengers dwindled, this guy changed his seat, and sat somewhere at the back of the bus; and i got the seat i wanted. It was a pleasant journey with slightly overcast skies accompanied by a small drizzle. Moreover, with nice songs to keep company, one couldn't ask for more.
All of a sudden the driver slowed down the bus. I looked out of the window, only to see a man walking with unsteady steps towards the front of the bus with a big piece of rock in his hand. It was not difficult to guess that he was heavily drunk. The driver as well as the conductor got down immediately and tried to hold him down. Sensing trouble, this guy who was sitting next to me, and who now occupied a seat somewhere at the back of the bus, got to the scene promptly. Without a second's hesitation he slapped the drunkard hard across his face. He tried getting him in the bus to hand him over at the next police station for raising such a situation. Mind you, it was a national highway and it was broad daylight. Another hard slap across the face. Finally, the drunk was saved as a friend of his somehow managed to stop these fellows from taking him into the bus.
Alright, so what's the point?
Nothing as such, but there's quite a lot to observe from this incident.

om shanti om

2007-11-24T22:48:00.000+05:30

I am just back from watching this movie, and i tell you, i enjoyed it. Enjoyed it for reasons that beg to be brought out.
There's this song wherein Farah Khan has managed to rope in like half the Hindi film industry. Every time a hero or a heroine makes an entry, there are shrill shouts you hear in the song, even i hooted on a couple of occasions. You could see those familiar steps from oldies like Jeetendra, Dharmendra and Mithun; things which make you change the channel if you see them while surfing, things which they themselves, i guess, must be ashamed to have performed and lured the audiences with once upon a time. Then there were the heroines, whom you could count to be well beyond their prime, Juhi Chawla, Urmila Matondkar, Tabu, Karishma Kapoor. No sooner do you try recalling is there someone important from the same age that's missing, one who's been a very 'lucky' part in all of SRK's movies in the last few years, than you see Kajol. They go through the K2H2 things once again, and it all seems pretty. Then there's the big three Khans: Sallu, Saif and Shar Rukh. With OSO, SRK also has joined the bandwagon of the other two who are only too happy to shed their shirts. And if you are talking about muscles, how can you forget Sanju Baba. The four of them get on top of the bar counter, all in a mood to do a striptease. There must be something like 50 of such characters in the song.
Otherwise the movie is crap, i admit; but i also admit that what one sees in a Hindi movie is what one can really count as our own. In spite of all the English movies that i enjoy watching, i aint sure if i would enjoy one with all Hollywood actors coming together for a similar song sequence. The song is like what you feel when you attend a close wedding -- the wedding is just a reason, what you care for is having a great time with your loved ones.
I feel if somebody has to teach the alphabet to a toddler it would be a good thing to start with: A for Amitabh, B for Bollywood ...

hurtful convenience

2007-07-01T21:23:00.000+05:30

It was one of my early days at my workplace when i had an urge to address the call of nature. On such an occasion one feels relieved, literally and otherwise, on finding a decent loo, but imagine my bliss on finding one with an attachment to wash your ass clean once you are done with your job, with just the turn of a knob. It's no great deal, i admit, but then you won't find it every place.
After having finished doing the thing i turned the knob and had a strong jet of water directed straight at my sensitive rear end. I turned the knob to weaken the force -- fine -- but as fate would have it, i turned it the wrong way, and in response to the increased force i turned it further, again the wrong way. It took me some time to compose myself after what i thought was like a pointy steel rod shoved up my rear end.
That was one feeling of pain i have experienced. It must have lasted for a time interval no greater than one fourth of a second, but i cringe everytime i relive that one fourth second. It's like what you feel on the way down a joy ride making a 70 degree angle with the horizontal. The descent lasts only a few seconds, but you feel as though you have lived an eternity.
I guess it was the price of convenience, or perhaps of my foolishness.

taking sides

2007-06-21T20:31:00.000+05:30

I parted ways with majority of my schoolmates after my 12th standard when i decided to go for B.Sc. Physics instead of engineering. To be honest, i don't think i had put a lot of thought into it at that time (all i had decided was that i won't go for medicine). Apart from that, i remember aspiring to become a teacher of organic chemistry, influenced by some teacher at the coaching classes, but my poor score at 12th in Chemistry left me wanting no more of that subject. After B.Sc. i cracked the entrance exam to get into IIT Madras for my M.Sc.
Towards the end of my first year at IITM, i had made up my mind to do Ph.D. I again managed to clear the necessary exams and interviews (4 out of 5) to be faced with the big question: Which institute should i choose? Having come to PRL (that's Physical Research Laboratory), the first six months saw me doing the mandatory courses, and then there was the second big question to be answered within a span of one year: Whom should i choose (approach for) to be my guide?
Now let me steer to the main topic. The questions mentioned above are the ones that i had to answer. I would have been stuck if i were not able to decide if i were to go for B.Sc. or engineering, and later if i should choose PRL any other institute, and so on. Let's say at such junctures, i had to physically take some action, like filling up a form for either Ruia or VJTI, and booking a ticket to either Ahmedabad or Bangalore. This might seem childish, but may prove really important.
But what if such a decision proves to be a terrible one? If you ask me, i would never feel sorry for that decision. You can call it sheer endurance or a refusal to admit an error in making the decision itself (NOTE). Things could have been equally bad or worse at any other place, but this is no consolation i offer myself anytime. It's just that, as a matter of policy, i don't feel there's any room for repentance anywhere under such a situation, all you can do is bear the storm as it comes.
Having said all this, i put forward another question. I am doing my Ph.D. right now i.e. i am doing some science. There are people who get all excited while talking about science, they get a smile on their face while discussing some interesting stuff, and most of the times they think about science and nothing else. These people are not nerds or scientists that are portrayed in a contorted way in cartoons and comic books, they are normal human beings who have devoted themselves truly and completely to science. On the other hand, i can say that science like other occupations has evolved, and that it should be treated just as any other profession. That would mean i can watch movies, attend parties, go for picnics, and work for science on the weekdays. The flip side to that is, i feel, it allows room for mediocrity, just like in other professions. (Even then i feel you won't find that in science, because here everyone works for themselves -- right from a student to a director -- and nobody else.) So which path do i choose? It's not that i would get stuck in a place if i don't answer the above question. In fact when i wrote NOTE in parentheses above, i was hinting towards making a similar choice.
Another such question would be: Was WMD the only reason why George Bush bombed Iraq, or did he have any hidden, selfish motive? There have been n number of articles saying that the US has been eyeing oil supplies in the middle-east for a long time, whereas one also has to note that it's not just the US, but countries like Russia and India too, that are hunting for oil in Iraq. So unless one takes pains himself to find out the answer, one's opinions would be based on reports from journalists with a probably questionable unbiasedness, or on purely gut feelings, in the extreme.
It seems that the answers to such questions don't matter. Here i may be totally wrong, but i will review it i feel so. Irrespective of the choice i make i will be leading my life in the same way i did before i was posed the question. So whether i decide to be a 'hard core' scientist or a 'professional' scientist will probably make no difference to how i actually do things when i am working. I can't resist at this point the temptation of relating the question to the dog in the idiom 'let sleeping dogs lie'.
In the end however, i can surprise you by giving a possible answer which equates the two sides. It's when Richard P. Feynman walks all the way around the entire hall to his chair, and not directly towards it, he says that 'I could do that, but i won't' is just another way of saying that you can't, in the book Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman!

the day i had a lot of FUN

2007-05-27T10:57:00.003+05:30

It's not everyday that you find yourself buying movie tickets to three shows in a single day at a multiplex. But i experienced such a day only recently, and i must say it was an experience worth noting down.
I love watching movies in a theatre. If it's not a CD/DVD i have hired, i have watched few good movies on my television set. With all the advertisements, people around you prompting climaxes in advance, and other distractions, watching movie on a TV/PC doesn't seem all that attractive. But it can be rewarding if you succeed in getting rid of all the parameters mentioned.
A movie theatre on the other hand manages to give you the right ambience, but for ringing cellphones. It was not until my graduation years that i started to go out for movies in place of classes. It was also our favourite way of asking friends 'lecture yaa picture?', and spat came the reply 'picture'. Another time i enjoyed watching movies every Saturday in an Open Air Theatre (OAT). Watching a movie in OAT is one thing you can't replicate any time, any place. The interval was the time to catch up with friends you hadn't been in contact with in the past week. And if your birthday happens to fall on a Saturday, you will be amply gifted with birthday bumps by about a dozen friends. A particular incidence was during Incredibles, in which the whole crowd broke into shouts and applause in the last half an hour of the movie; something that can be paralleled only by the hysteria displayed by people during last three overs during Lagaan. Bunty aur Babli was the last but one movie i watched at OAT, if i remember correctly, and there were shrill whistles all around -- as if it's a real-life nautanki or tamaasha -- when Rani Mukherjee makes an entry clad in a tomato red dress, flanked by mud-wrestlers in an akhaada; each one showing off curves appropriate to oneself.
Wait! I am digressing way too much. Coming back to it!
The current place i am in, doesn't have much to offer towards this end. Wanting to see a movie, i even went for Namastey London, a thing which otherwise i wouldn't have done, probably. So when the opportunity showed itself, in the form of a stretch of three holidays, i couldn't resist the itch to run from the place and catch up with what i missed. I reached Ahmedabad early morning on a Friday, it was Good by the way. I had planned to watch four movies in the span of three days, but was forced to cut it down to three in a single day. Thus i had 300 at 1115, The Namesake at 1720, and Pursuit of Happyness at 2000 hours. I admit, however, that by the time the last movie of the day resumed after the interval, i was drained; but that was the best among the three.
Having said all this i must add that before going for the movies i was all excited, but it was undue, is what i felt after the movies. Something like when Mangal Pandey let down Aamir Khan fans.

the immortals

2007-04-20T20:37:00.000+05:30

It is only when it strikes him that the girl he keeps on seeing doesn't seem to grow up over the years, does the mathematician John Nash realise that she does not exist at all but for his imagination in the Russell Crowe starrer A Beautiful Mind.
But you have lots of others who would be stuck in time for as long as the humankind exists -- the cartoon characters. So you have Jughead and Archies forever going after Betty and Veronica (whatever the order may be), and you have Calvin, alongwith his pal Hobbes, who simply would not stop himself from playing pranks and getting into troubles. That and many more.
So kudos to Tom, Jerry, Hagar, Helga, Calvin, Hobbes, Nancy, Sarge, Beatle, Archies, Jughead, Garfield, Jon, Chintu, and all the wonderful people who try make everyday a good day for all of us. I won't wish them to live a hundred or a thousand, for they are truly the immortals. And this time around, unlike almost a millenium ago, I bet, there won't be a person to put their name to test.

every dog has his day

2007-03-28T19:38:00.000+05:30

It so happened that these two guys were out at the grocer. Now you must have seen a dog sneeze, i mean heard, i mean both, but imagine their surprise when they realised that the dog occupying an unobtrusive corner of the street was coughing; yes, the dog seemed to have a kind of sore throat. It was amusing to these guys initially as they kept staring at the poor fellow. So much the dog minded their intrusion that just like a bathroom singer who'll stop singing midway if he sees an intruder -- not a highly likely circumstance though -- this dog actually tried to suppress his relentless coughing. This almost threw the two into hyesteric fits of laughter. It was these two humans who in the first place had interrupted his solitude, must have thought the dog, and now they are making my delicate health issue a butt of ridicule. Ultimately unable to bear the shame at the hands of a species who takes pride in calling a dog as its best friend, this beast that can simply make the same species flee with a snarling display of his canines meekly surrendered to his fate and walked away from the place.
After all every dog has his day!

the morbid me

2007-01-12T18:34:00.001+05:30

This gives an account of morbid tales of slaughter as narrated by a friend of mine.
Coming to the smallest of the animals, a chicken. It is held by its legs and its head is banged on to a wall, that's it, the little fellow is dead and out. If I remember correctly, a 'broiler' will be killed instantly in such a process, but a 'poultry' has a stronger will to live, I guess. A chopper can also be used to do this job. Here, if you are a Hindu, you will have to hit the neck, and if a Muslim, then cut the throat. A Muslim do it with two and a half strokes of his knife, each stroke accompanied by the Almighty's name. The religious distinction as regards the method of slaughtering holds for any animal; any damn animal.
Next comes a goat, a supposedly big animal. A rope is tied around its neck, passing through its horns and fastened to a tree. At this point I thought they might be strangulating the goat, but never had I heard of strangulating a goat to its death, and neither was I on the right track. Once secured to the tree, the goat is physically stretched by somebody holding its front legs and somebody else the rear ones. Having done that a strong swing of chopper is all that is needed to put an end to the goat's life. If you are quick enough, you can collect the spilt blood which will coagulate on adding some ingredient; and this my friend says tastes extremely delicious on frying.
Coming to the hulk of an animal: the cow/bull. It is locked up in a cage like the one they have in a veterinary hospital for livestock mating/vaccination. Then about a dozen men force the cow to sit down by using wooden logs placed on her back. Once motionless, the cow -- perhaps the most serenely innocent of all the domesticated beasts -- is slaughtered. Just imagine the huge quantity of meat. Even if half of it (let's say 200 kg) is turned into productive meat, it can very well host a feast for about 400 people.
One might ask at the end, when and how did I start with this topic; why after all?! Well, it all began with a video clip on seeing which a friend of mine was almost about to puke, puke with disgust, fear, horror and what not. The video -- downloaded from BBC site -- showed a couple of men standing by the side of a third one who was lying on the ground blindfold. One of the men standing produced a chopper and started sawing the helpless person's neck, just as one would saw off a log. With half of his neck cut and blood gushing out as milk would from a split milk pouch, the man's chest, pretty much involuntarily, I believe, was gasping for air. This went on for a few seconds, before the man resumed his job, and sawed the head completely off the rest of his body, and placed it on his torso. What followed seemed quite sober: shooting down people.
That's it, I guess!

guest?

2007-01-06T17:33:00.000+05:30

When the Unwanted Guest arrives
I might be afraid
I might smile or say:
My day was good, let night fall.
You will find the fields ploughed, the house clean,
The table set,
And everything in its place.

-- Paulo Coelho in The Zahir

arxiv

2006-12-05T18:45:00.013+05:30

> a man is not his job; he is apart from his job.
> do you know what's the best way to better your 'Best Times' in minesweeper?
reset them!
>'isn't it sad how some people's grip on their lives is so precarious that they'll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth', so says Calvin.
> there's no better way than working to pass your time at work.
> once a cricket lover, always a cricket lover.
> you can choose not to get angry when stuck in traffic.
> getting upset over someone's religious, political or cultural opinions is the first step towards intolerance.
> sometimes you feel like a sick bastard!
> stay hungry! stay foolish! ... steve jobs.
> what's in a place? that which we call a gulab jamun sitting on a toilet seat, would taste as sweet!
> there's hardly any black or white, all you see is shades of grey.
> Calvin: i've got PLENTY of common sense! i just choose to ignore it.
> the handlebar of a cycle is a place to rest your hands on while riding, using it to manoeuvre the cycle is just a subsidiary function it can perform.
> blogito, ergo sum.
> 42.7% of all the statistics are made on the spot.
> if you can read something without much effort, a lot of effort has gone into its writing.
> do not laugh at a person's gait before walking in his shoes.
> when you don't know what you are doing, do it neatly.
> sometimes it's better to treat an unknown entity as a degree of freedom than a handicap.
> nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.

. . . some silly, interesting things i come across some place.

ahh! the second way!

2006-11-15T18:24:00.000+05:30

Know what?! There are two ways you can brush your teeth:
(i) You can move your hand with the brush going up and down, left and right.
OR
(ii) You can hold your hand steady and keep on shaking and nodding your head so
that your teeth brush against the toothbrush.

Now isn't that novel?

twinkle twinkle little star

2006-11-05T12:41:00.001+05:30

¨ ... yet it sometimes happpens, perhaps because of the very real and aesthetic appeal of astronomy and the almost incomprehensible vastness of the Universe, that the more solidly practical and duller mentalities tend to see the study as an ¨escape from reality¨ -- surely one of the most thoroughly lopsided views ever propounded. The knowledge obtained from astronomy has always been and will continue to be, of the greatest value. But, this apart, only the most myopic minds could identify ¨reality¨ solely with the doings of man on this planet. Contemporary civilization, whatever its advantages and achievements, is characterised by many features which are, to put it very mildly, disquieting; to turn away from this increasingly artificial and alien world is to escape from unreality; to return to the timeless world of the mountains, the sea, the forest, and the stars is to return to sanity and truth.¨

-- Robert Burnham Jr.

here is more:

Twinkle, twinkle, little star, How I wonder what you are.

Up above the world so high, Like a diamond in the sky.

When the blazing sun is gone, When he nothing shines upon,

Then you show your little light, Twinkle, twinkle, all the night.

Then the traveler in the dark Thanks you for your tiny spark;

He could not see which way to go, If you did not twinkle so.

In the dark blue sky you keep, And through my curtains often peep,

For you never shut your eyes, Till the morning Sun does rise.

As your bright and tiny spark, Lights the trav'ler in the dark,

Though I know not what you are, Twinkle on, please, little star.

Twinkle, twinkle, little star, How I wonder what you are!

Up above the world so high ...

the Sun lover

2006-11-03T18:16:00.000+05:30

It's one of those things you read a long, long time back and still but still can't help recalling it time and again.
It was a story about a lion in some jungle who was in love with the Sun. Just before the sunrise, the lion started running eastwards to catch the place where the Sun would begin its journey of the day. The entire jungle witnessed him running like a maniac possessed by some sort of a spirit. There a deer and there was a hare standing along his way, but he had no time in the world to cater to his bodily instincts. After a furious bit of running he reached the bank of a vast river across which this king of the jungle saw the magnanimous ball of fire rise.
That's it, nothing more! Just the story a child would like to read.

???

2006-10-26T18:28:00.002+05:30

Right now I am in a fix. This site has seen me coming every now and then and yet I am unable to decide what contents should be published here. This blogging is, believe me, more addictive than orkutting -- if I may say so -- for anybody having the slightest liking towards writing.

... until the time I make up my mind.

insane instinct

2006-10-16T19:44:00.000+05:30

In Mumbai and almost the entire Maharashtra, it was raining like hell since last Friday. It was only today that the mighty Sun shone its warm light on a drenched world. There were a couple of things that turned me on this monsoon. First, the State Transport bus journey from Ale, my native place, to Thane via the Malshej Ghat. It was something you have to witness yourself to have an idea about. I am not so good a writer to describe the sheer naked beauty of a rain-soaked mountainside. I feel Mumbai should consider herself fortunate to enjoy the proximity of the mighty Sahyadris. Second, the book ‘Maajhi Mulukhgiri’ by Milind Gunaaji. I felt almost ashamed on reading the numerous places that he has given a first-hand information on in his book, because I must have visited not even a tenth of those; with all these places within Maharashtra. These rains had left me marooned in my own house. Our plan for a trek to Vikramgad that was to materialise today was also force-cancelled. And then, I had a tremendous urge. With a friend showing little interest, I was left all alone to go to Yeoor, a local hill; not that I don’t like the idea.
So yesterday I started from home at about 3:20 and reached Yeoor base around 4 pm. I had no intention of climbing the hill on a tar road. So no sooner did I see a path going right into the jungle, than I ventured onto it. The path was good enough surrounded by dense trees and criss-crossed regularly by rivulets. The danger of a cheetah lurking from behind and pouncing on my back was always there. I kept on walking; simply. I was questioning myself at what point should I back off. The tension within me was telling and I felt sweat in spite of a continuous drizzle. I must have walked for about 35 minutes and the thoughts of retracing my path back to the tar road were getting stronger when I was met by a loud roaring stream with a considerable force through which I saw some people making their way. I followed them for some time, blindly; the stream not letting them any knowledge of a lone walker just a few steps behind them. I had to turn back on knowing from them that this path won’t lead me to the aashram on the hilltop. I didn’t attempt much of tracing back my path, but just held on to some trace a passing stream had carved. To my surprise I was led to a tar road with a dead end. I took the road with the dead end behind me. The gate marking the end of road would probably have attracted more attention on my part had I not been in a hurry to find a way out.
There had been a point of time before I reached the road when I thought that I would be really lucky to get home safe tonight. There have been a couple of instances where an apparently safe action had landed me in deep trouble, though not ever-lasting, and walking through the jungle I just prayed that this doesn’t turn out to be something like that; if it indeed had, I would possibly have required to pay dearly; very dearly.
So walk I did along the road. I felt relieved at the sight of a few people across the fence on my right, which was running all along. Now it was just a matter of time before I got back to something ‘human’. To my left was a rising mountain slope and down it flowed many a big and small streams on to the road and down the fence. At last! I saw an opening in the fence – a properly cut-open part – and without worrying about trespassing I went through it. The rest was easy. The area was adjacent to a hill resort and the fence I believe was meant to protect it from cheetahs. I took a dip in the stream there – a mighty one again – and headed down the hill, on a road. Strangely I showed a finger to another path that seemingly promised an adventurous traveller a shorter route to his destination through the deep jungles.
Now show me two people in the world who will agree on the definitions of ‘instinct’ and ‘insanity’ and I will tell you one from the other.

are you afraid of the DARK?

2006-10-16T19:40:00.001+05:30

I first of all would like to mention the name of Sydney Sheldon, for I owe the title of this essay to one of his novels; the mention however stands a value if this essay is responsible for a reduction in sales of the suspense storywriter’s famous book, if any.
It's been a long time since somebody asked me the question I have put forward in my title and when I wonder why this is so, it doesn’t take much time to figure out things. It's in the childhood only that a normal person is faced with this question. The reason can be put down to sheer unfamiliarity of the dark world. Childhood is the time when your daily routine is seldom perturbed; you are supposed to wake up at 7:00 am, go to school, have lunch and a siesta in afternoon, do some homework play a lot, watch some TV and so on, that's it. You don't need to stay up late until night and worry about your position two years into the future.
It's only after getting to your tenth or twelfth class, when you start having sleepless nights. I remember very nicely one of my first such experiences. I had spent some time in my balcony leaving aside my studies trying to enjoy the all-pervading silence. The city was asleep and there were lights burning everywhere, nevertheless that really seemed like the rule of the dark, the time mother nature planned for us so that we can relax; and contemplate on the day's events, perhaps. On a certain day I also listened carefully the sounds of the canine community in my neighbourhood. The present institute where I am studying knows no sleep. You can go anywhere, anytime and your friend can't curse you or ask you to come later if he is in deep sleep, and you decide to spend some time with him. It's been quite a few times that we returned to our hostels late in the night after visiting some nice place, like the beach or a hotel or a late night movie.
The essence of the whole essay is that, you have to get familiarised with a thing, if you want to be not afraid of it. Now, being a student of science, I will try to see if the hypothesis works equally well with some other things. What about the fear of talking to new people, fear of undertaking a project or for that matter, even the fear of riding a cycle in a crowded city street. A bit of thinking and you will see the question doesn't need an answer from anybody other than yourself. It's not that I have put here the greatest piece of advice you will ever receive, it's just that I tried to generalise a thing about which I personally have little questions to ask.