Turned On By Life

Sex Addiction, Orgasm and Influencing Sexual Transmutation

2009-11-10T16:40:00.000-08:00

Are you addicted to orgasm?
How would you even know? Orgasm is such a natural act and most men have been orgasming very regularly from a very young age. Is addiction a problem anyway, it is natural and harmless…. But is it really?

Women can be orgasm addicts to. Do find yourself irritable or moody especially with your partner if you haven’t ‘had it’ for a while? Can you last a week without it?
Scientific studies have shown that orgasm produces chemical changes in the brain that are similar to heroin addicts.

Recent brain science discoveries reveal that sex is governed by the reward center of the limbic system in the brain. A Dutch scientist discovered that brain scans of orgasm closely resemble scans of shooting heroin. Other studies show that after orgasm a "sexual-satiation" neurochemical shoots up, and the neurochemistry affecting libido changes radically. In short, conventional sex can cause a hangover.

http://www.reuniting.info/introduction/about_science

So what impact does this have on our life and relationships? Biology has ‘wired’ us to mate and move on to increase the gene pool and procreates the species. Not a good program for the promotion of monogamous, long term relationships. So why fight biology and just give into our natural urges? What would you rather have in life, a long term, fulfilling and loving partner or a series of exciting short term flings that leave you empty and craving for more? A best friend and lover or a hot passionate lover every now and again?

Addictions can cause pain if we can look beyond the short term ‘buzz’ and excitement. Are we even aware of intense cravings for more and irritability when we don’t get it? Are we aware of the way we treat our partner the day after we have released our sexual energy through orgasm.
Pornography and lust intensify addictions. These two things can reproduce the same chemistry in our brain that brings on the cravings for more. So how do we overcome sexual addiction?

Firstly we have to be aware of it. This is the hardest step. For any addict it is hard to admit it, after all that would be admitting to flaws in our character, or so we think. So what constitutes an addiction? How long can you go without orgasm? How long can you go without looking at pornography? Does it eat into your work time or consume your rest time? Sometimes we are not even aware of how our addictions are affecting our moods and our relationships until cracks start to appear. It is not until something usually negative, brings our behavior to our attention.

George was an orgasm addict. He wasn’t going to admit it until after his 2nd marriage was starting to show signs of deterioration. It was his frustration and pain that showed him his first marriage ended because of his addiction. He was determined that his investment in his second marriage was not going to end up like the first but the feelings and frustration that led him down the path of destruction were starting to show 5 years into his 2nd marriage. “The first few years were awesome. My partner shared the same high sex drive and enthusiasm for sexual exploration as I did. After 2 children things have dropped off and I don’t know what to do. I can’t concentrate at work and I am becoming very short fused at home. Spending time on the net to satisfy his cravings was only making them worse.”

So how about willpower? Cross this one off the list. Studies show that willpower is not the best approach to any addiction. Distracting someone with negative consequences doesn’t work.

The Influencer, The Power to Change Anything provides valuable keys to tackle addiction. It describes how a nation decreased the incidence of the spread of AIDS virus through influencing the use of condoms. If large populations can be influenced, tackling your individual problems must be a breeze.

http://www.amazon.com/Influencer-Change-Anything-Kerry-Patterson/dp/007148499X

Here are a few of my notes from the Influencer to start you off on the Sexual Transmutation of lust and addiction to empowerment.

Behaviors in people change because-
1. They think it is worth it
2. They think they can do it

Ways to enhance "I think I can do it"

Little chunks. Set a strategy or a plan for this month only then check in with the results at the end of the month to set your next strategy or plan.
Break mastery into many goals.

Best strategy• transform the difficult into the easy,
• the difficult into the easy,
• the aversive into the pleasant
• the boring into the interesting

Are you a grabber or delayer?
Delayers created diversions to take their mind off rewards to delay gratification.
Delayers focus on tasks rather than rewards.
People who glance at the reward most often were least resistant.
Individuals that exercise self control achieve better outcomes than those who don't.
Self discipline can be learned. Much of will is skill
Adopt a growth mindset.

Personal ability - demand more from yourself to increase self respect.
A change in heart cannot be imposed- it can only be chosen.
The difference between sacrifice and punishment is not the amount of pain but the amount of choice.

Create a vision of who you want to be.
Engage in moral thinking. Many of us just go through the motions without associating what we are doing with a sense of a greater purpose.
See you choices as moral quests or personally defining moments - keep this perspective despite distractions and emotional stress.

When can you be the lover?

2009-11-07T17:49:00.000-08:00

When can you be the lover? OSHO

You will have to live dangerously. You will have to move towards the unknown, and you will have to love persons and not things. You will have to be ready not to possess anybody, because the moment you possess the person is not there. Only a thing can be possessed. OSHO

When you look through the eyes of logic, you will know a few things, but those few things will not give you the vision of reality. They will be only abstractions.

When you look through love, then you know the reality as it is. Love is falling with the universe, together; falling in a togetherness. It is orgasmic: you are streaming, and the existence has always been streaming, and both streamings meet and mingle and are infused in each other. A higher synthesis arises: the part is meeting in the whole and the whole is meeting in the part. Then something arises which is more than the part and the whole together -- that's what love is. 'Love' is one of the most significant words in human languages, because love is existential language.

But somehow, from the very childhood, we are being crippled. Our roots with the heart are cut. We are forced towards the head and we are not allowed to move towards the heart. It is something humanity has suffered for long, a calamity -- that man has not yet become capable of living with love.

There are reasons.

Love is risky. To love is to move into danger -- because you cannot control it, it is not safe. It is not within your hands. It is unpredictable: where it will lead nobody knows. Whether it will lead anywhere, that too nobody knows. One is moving into utter darkness but roots grow only in darkness. If the roots of a tree become afraid of darkness and don't move underground, the tree will die. They have to move into darkness. They have to find their way towards the deepest layers of the earth where they can find sources of water, nourishment.

The heart is the darkest part of your being. It is like a dark night. It is your very womb, it is your earth.

So people are afraid to move into darkness; they would like to remain in light. At least you can see where you are and what is going to happen. You are safe, secure. When you move in love, you cannot calculate the possibilities, you cannot calculate the results. You cannot be result-oriented. For love, future does not exist, only the present exists. You can be in this moment but you cannot think anything about the next moment. No planning is possible in love.

The society, civilization, culture, church, all force a small child to be more logical. They try to focus his energies in the head. Once the energies are focused in the head, it becomes very difficult to fall towards the heart. In fact, every child is born with great love energy. The child is born out of love energy.

we teach logic. These seem to be measures for survival. We teach fear, we teach caution, we teach prudence, and all these together kill the possibility of love.

If you love a woman, you are immediately ready to reduce her to being your wife, that is, you are ready to reduce her to a certain role: the role of a wife -- which is more predictable than the reality of a beloved. If you love a man you are ready to possess him like a thing. You would like him to be your husband, because a lover is more liquid; one never knows....

A husband seems to be more solid. At least the law is there, the court is there, the police is there, the state government is there to give a certain solidity to the husband. A lover seems to be like a dream: not so substantial. Immediately people fall in love, they are ready to get married -- such fear of love! And whomsoever we love, we start trying to control. That's the conflict that goes on between wives and husbands, mothers and sons, brothers and sisters, friends -- who is going to possess whom? That means: who is going to define whom, who is going to reduce-whom to a thing? Who will be the master and who will be the slave?

Remember, the first calamity is that one becomes head-oriented. The second calamity is that one starts substituting love needs with things. Then you are lost, lost in the desert land. Then you will never reach to the ocean. Then you will simply dissipate and evaporate. Then your whole life will be a sheer wastage.

The moment you become aware that this is what is happening, turn the tide: make all efforts to again contact the heart. Make contact with the heart again to undo that which has been done to you by the society. Undoing that which has been done by the society is true religion, undoing all nonsense that has been done by your well-wishers. They may be thinking that they are helping you, and they may not be knowingly destroying you; they may themselves be victims of their parents and their society. I'm not saying anything against them. Great compassion is needed for them.

The head has become so dominant that it does not allow any spontaneity. It has become dictatorial. It does not allow the heart even to utter a single word; it has forced the heart to be completely quiet. You will have to listen again to the heart. You will have to start dropping logic a little. You will have to take a few risks.

You will have to live dangerously. You will have to move towards the unknown, and you will have to love persons and not things. You will have to be ready not to possess anybody, because the moment you possess the person is not there. Only a thing can be possessed.

Try to understand it as deeply as possible: the moment you fall in love with somebody, immediately your whole conditioning starts trying to possess him. Resist that temptation; the devil is tempting you -- the devil of the society, the devil of civilization and the church. The devil stands in a very religious garb, and the devil goes on quoting scriptures. Beware!

Whenever you start possessing you are killing love. So either you can possess the person or you can love the person; both together are not possible.

The ego goes on agreeing for wrong things, because the ego can exist only with the wrong. It feeds on the wrong. So whenever you feel that your ego is fulfilled, beware! -- you have eaten something wrong, you have swallowed something wrong. Whenever you feel egoless, relax -- now you have eaten the right, something which is in tune with your nature.

Ego arises out of disturbance, but ego has its own logic. It goes on saying that you are important, that you are the most important man in the world, and you have to prove it. And we are all trying to do this one way or the other -- somebody by possessing more money, somebody by possessing a beautiful woman, somebody by possessing prestige, power, somebody by becoming a president or a premier, somebody by becoming an artist, a poet, somebody by becoming a MAHATMA -- but we are all trying in some way or other to prove our innermost fantasy, that we are the most important person in the world.

Then you cannot be a lover.

OSHO

New discussion forum - using the art of Sexual Transmutation

2009-10-31T17:46:00.000-07:00

Join our discussion community and share your inspirations and stories using the art of sexual transmutation. I have had amazing feedback from a few sportsmen recently that have really noticed an increase in performance by controling ejaculation.

We all need motivation to actually put into practice techniques so lets give each other feedback and encouragement. How long can you maintain an ejaculation control cycle and is there a point where there is no longer an intense urge/desire to release or 'reset'.

Sexual Transmutation is not just about ejaculation control or men as a matter of fact. The power of the mind is a major factor. How do you use it.

For women, can you enhance your energy through increasing orgasm or is your response more masculine and you experience the 'roll over and go to sleep" affect?

Join the forum

..

Sexual Overstimulation

2009-10-27T14:12:00.000-07:00

Our overstimulation causes a cycle of addictions.

We become addicted because it feels good. We lose addictions when we find out it feels better not to be addicted. It feels far more empowering to know that we have control. Addictions control our mind and our actions. To be released from addictions is to be released from a prison.

Overstimulation is the cause of stress, depression, and clinically labelled disorders such as bipolar and sexual dysfunctions.

We over stimulate our body and our mind with information over load, high work expectations and the top it all off with chemicals that over irritate our nerve cells and excite our nervous system...... then wonder why we can’t cope with life, we wonder why other people can’t cope with us, and wonder why we have weight issues, cardiac disorders and sexual dysfunctions before the age of 50.

For example, over consumption of caffeine sets up a cycle of hypoglycaemia which comes from an overstimulated pancreas. This then causes the constant rollercoaster ride of caffeine highs, sugar lows, the shakes and cravings for more caffeine and a sugar cravings boost to the blood sugar levels.

An over stimulated mind is a stressed mind even if we have formulated the beief that ‘I function better under pressure’. An over stimulated mind overstimulates our bodies cortisol levels, a stress hormone, that then depresses our testosterone and our libido, our erections. Testosterone is our youth hormone. It is our strength to stay young and motivated and energetic.

Over stimulation kills our creative edge. Our mind may be functioning at 100 miles an hour solving problems and analysing, processing. We may think we are functioning at our peak, but in reality our effort is all concentrated in 3% of our mind power and that 3% is working dam hard.

To really tap into our inner genius and come up with creative solutions ... effortlessly, and without chemical and mental over stimulation, we need to let go, we need to release all our overstimulating addictions and still the mind.

We can then use the powerful techniques of sexual transmutation to take our creative genius to a higher level. The sensualising of sexual energy that has been stimulated naturally (and not overstimulated by too much of anything artificial including mechanical toys and vibrators) to sensual energy, filtered through heart emotions of gratitude, humility and appreciation, can be the most profound and amazing experience you can share with another person.

In the east they call it Samadhi, the ultimate euphoric experience.

Better Sex Now!

2009-10-17T13:46:00.000-07:00

Let me share something with you that most people are embarressed or even ashamed to talk about.

Have you seen those big yellow and red billboards that proclaim “Make love longer” and “Better Sex Now” … the medical profession and drug companies encouraging quick fixes to your sex life and performance that has disinterrgrated because a a very simple factor in peoples lives.

You don’t need drugs to awaken your personal friend (attached down there) that can provide you with so much pleasure and fulfilment.

Find out how you can re-light your fire naturally.

Find out HOW to stimulate your sex energy for success in every area of your life.

Find out how to tranform that energy into sensual heart energy to transform your relationship.

Find out how to elevate your energy, happiness, inspiration to a new level.
Find out about full body orgasm.

The Currency of Sexual Energy – the art of Sexual Transmutation – Y.S de Jong

“I wish I could have read it at the start back last year. You really have changed my life in more ways than I could possibly have imagined.”

Sexual Repression has a price

2009-10-13T14:22:00.000-07:00

Last night I caught a cab home with an amazing gentleman called who I will call Lakmi. Lakmi is from India. I was walking down Clarendon st watching as his cab was driving past me in the other direction and the thought entered my mind, “I’d like to hail that cab”. I watched as the cab immediately turned around and pulled over beside me with out the slightenst indication from me that I wanted him except for my glance. After complimenting the ‘cabbie’ on his receptivity, we launched into an hour long conversation about sexuality. It didn’t actually take an hour to drive home, we kept conversing outside of my home.

Lakmi has a friend who got himself into trouble. As a married man who doesn’t ‘get much’, he was easily distracted by another woman's advances. He was invited into her home and he watched as she undressed in front of him and offered him to ‘be with her’.

Hardly an offer any horny man can refuse in the heat of the moment. The out come was not as ‘lucky’. The next day the woman had rung the police and reported that she had been raped by this man.
I believe this mans story that he was taken advantage of. Our sexual hormones and chemicals can be mind controlling and as addictive as heroine. The offer of sexual satisfaction can override all rationality and common sense.

I also understand the enormity that our social conditioning has on guilt and shame associated with sexuality. The seductive woman may have had a great time at the time but then the consequences of guilt and shame seeping in by morning can elicit a reaction of panic and regret. Shame and guilt can drive a person to suicide so it is understandable and comprehensible that she had this emotional reaction and claimed rape.

The other big factor in this story is the origin of the people involved. They come from India, a country where Westerners go to find enlightenment but also a country where their social conditioning has sexuality in a state of shame and repression.
We all feel this conditioning to some degree no matter what country we are from. Control and suppression is the breeding ground for frustration, and sexual expression that isn’t so healthy.

Find a way to express your sexuality. Allow it to flourish in a healthy way and learn the art of transforming that energy into inspiration. Allow your sexuality to empower you instead of trapping your mind and body in outdated social ‘rules’ and belief systems.
Learn the power of creating sensual connections. Sensual awareness and sensual communication can change lives.

Secrets of sex alchemy

2009-10-09T13:25:00.000-07:00

Yasmin,
Stumbled upon your website - it's pretty impressive how you've managed to consolidate the 'secrets of alchemy' into a usable modern format - congratulations. This is going to be extremely useful for the members of the 'New Golden Age'.

We are both from the medical profession [I qualify as a medical doctor in 6 months time], so you may have noticed this in your previous years' research - a lot of the great 'alchemists' of the past were medical doctors and medical professionals - I sometimes wonder why.

I was just curious as to whether your book included anything on solo cultivation.

Not too sure whether the public realise that what you have given them in a single book is what people got burnt on the stake for practising - these are some of the world's most highly kept and sough after secrets - this stuff is truly powerful.

Another thing - I work with a lot of the top doctors and professors in the country and noticed one thing - these guys look surprisingly young for their age. It kinda clicked in my mind that what was going on was that these guys were unconsciously [ or consciously - perhaps they were part of a secret society], transmuting their sexual energy, which had the side effect of slowing down ageing. I was kind of shocked when the idea came to my head - have a look - geniuses seem to age slower than everyone else.

It's awesome that this information is coming out - people go for botox treatments to look younger, without realising that they are degenerating themselves by spilling their sexual life force energy - it's essential that this information comes out.

Later on, I would like to do your sexual transmutation course - spinal tap studies appear to show microscopic evidence of sexual fluid in cases of sexual transmutation [ I can forward you the book I read this in if you like] - this is VERY VERY interesting stuff, and it blew my mind when I read it.

Sexual transmutation and 'kundalini science' needs to be made available to everyone in the world - it is my hope that one day, sexual transmutation will be as normal as brushing our teeth. Imagine Yasmin - the world will be transformed!!

The cuddle drug

2009-10-08T02:45:00.000-07:00

Oxytocin is the love hormone. Love is a magical ingredient that enriches our life and balances our egos. The cuddle hormone comes from sensual touch as opposed to sexual touch.

Lao Tzu in the Hua Hu Ching, taught that ordinary sex which places emphasis on pleasuring the sexual organs ‘dissipates and disorders the subtle energies’. The need to strive for orgasm disharmonises the emotions. The focus on physical pleasure to satisfy a relationship soon disintegrates and leads to feelings of dissatisfaction and restlessness.

By evening out the chemical rollercoaster and slowing down intimacy, the cuddle hormone can dominate and flourish, enhancing deeper chemical connections. Slowing down also enhances focus on forging deeper awareness though sex creating deer spiritual connections. This connection at a deeper level is a million times stronger than a physical connection.

Sex drive comes from instinct. Instinct wants us to reproduce. Our intellect tells us we are more than just an animal that is pre programmed to exist a certain way of life on this earth. We have a higher level of consciousness, our intuition tells us this. Our intuition, our inner knowing turns our intellect into intelligence.
Physical desire keeps up rooted to the earth. Our intuition releases us from the chains that keep our mind and ego locked into a primitive way of thinking. Our intuition frees us from the confines of our emotions. If we let our emotions rule our life then we are at the whim of the world and it’s influences, we have no real control or mastery over our life.

When we allow a greater energy to enter our body, orgasm is like an electric current pulsing though our body awakening our consciousness and reconnecting us. This greater energy is beyond a chemical orgasm of testosterone and dopamine. It is the mind and ego that knows a chemical orgasm and is addicted to this chemistry. It is also the ego and the mind that fears letting go of this experience. Letting go of physical control is like walking over a cliff and trusting that you can fly. Who would believe that you can fly until you actually experience it?

Read more "The Currency of Sexual Energy" Yasmin S.de Jong

Inspiration or gratification – but sex is my passion!

2009-09-13T12:56:00.000-07:00

Where is your focus? Where are you focusing your life energy, your sex energy?
We all have it, some more than others. For some, we overstimulate that energy with porn and one night stands focussing on gratification of the sense and create compounding addictions that rule our life and waste our energy.

But sex is my passion you say!

Yes, sex can be your passion and can create more passion and inspiration than you ever imagined elevating your mind to the level of a genius… IF… you can control your focus.

If you learn the skill of stimulating your energy for a purpose then focussing that energy on inspiration instead of gratification…. BIG difference. Just sit for a while comparing those 2 words and ask yourself where either of them will get you, where they will take you in life, what results they will produce and how they will affect other people.

Gratification has you spending hours (and dollars) on the internet wasting time, stimulating and arousing you and probably frustrating you to the point of wanting to ‘release’ that energy through self orgasm.

Inspiration has your mind and body buzzing with energy which is released through writing, painting, creating or training for a major sporting event.

Sex addiction ruins lives. It can create chemical changes in the brain that alter behaviour that conflict with our deepest and heart felt beliefs and love relationships. It can put us in situations that risk our health and go against our better judgement. It can rule our every thought…. every minute of the day.

We can retrain the subconscious using the intensity of the sex addiction itself…. Only if the participant is willing and aware of the addiction and it’s consequences on their life.

It is simple… not easy. You will need willpower and awareness, and the realisation that sexual frustration is impacting on your life and others in a detrimental way.

Two words – inspiration or gratification – where is your focus?

Sports Energy Intensive

2009-09-08T21:15:00.000-07:00

If you are an elite athlete with a rigorous training schedule, your body needs maintenance, your energy needs maintenance and you are probably very strict on your time management, your diet, your energy resources and ration out a slim social life if any.

How can you provide yourself with well needed timeout to recharge and refresh yourself while maintaining a full time job and strict training schedule?

If this is your issue, then invest in yourself with a unique therapy that combines deep tissue massage, sensual massage (yes we like it deep but want to feel good too) AND and informative program of energy enhancement through natural Sexual Transmutation techniques. Boost your drive and strength by boosting your testosterone.

Makes sense doesn’t it. Look after yourself in a bundle….. save time mix body maintenance with a pleasurable sensual overtone. How unique!

SPORTS ENERGY INTENSIVE

Cupid's Poisoned Arrow

2009-09-07T14:37:00.000-07:00

This is the introduction out of my newly released book The Currency of Sexual Energy. I had under estimated the significance of this first story until last night when I started reading Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow – from habit to harmony in sexual relationships by Marnia Robinson. I take my hat off to an author who has completely challenged conventional sexuality and our learned behaviours and habits that keep disharmony in our relationships.

Introduction:

John’s phone call to me was that of urgency. He had to find someone to give him ‘hand relief’ and he needed it before his lunch time appointment.
John had a fairly high sex drive, but it wasn’t being satisfied. He was like most average men, addicted to the rush of orgasm and ejaculation. In his mind he needed stress relief and to ejaculate would provide that for him.

The problem was, his need was controlling him. He was like a drug addict looking for his next fix. He could not focus on his next meeting until he had got his hand relief out of the way. The add he saw intrigued him. Surely something called sexual transmutation involved hand relief were his thoughts.

I told him clearly on the phone that an appointment with me would not include hand relief or any genital massage. So why would a ‘addict’ take a chance at a drug that wasn’t promising him his fix?

John’s sexual urges were natural but they were controlling him, frustrating him, disempowering him. He was like a drug addict. I asked John if he would like to turn all that around? He made an appointment for the next day.

His feed back was that of astonishment. He never new he could feel so good without actually having sex or ejaculating. A new dimension had entered his life. He found out sexual desire is a force in our life that we can use to our advantage rather than it using us.

Cupid's Poisoned Arrow

“[Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow] seriously challenges conventional ‘wisdom’ about human sexual interactions. It is antithetical to modern cultural beliefs about sexual behaviour as Galileo’s treatise was to astronomy. In Galileo’s time the earth (like the orgasm) was thought to be the incontestable centre of the universe. Marnia Robinson’s hypothesis might result in much needed navigational improvements for modern family relationship’s” – A.J REID FINLAYSON, MD, Division of Addiction Medicine, Department of Psychiatry, Vanderbilt School of Medicine.

I could not put this book down last night. Her insights, research and stories were frightfully compelling and I realised, I had heard a lot of them before in a different form, from different people….. my clients at the studio.

The Currency of Sexual Energy was written to supplement the work that I do at the studio. It is written for my clients who are mainly men. The concepts definatly are just as applicable to women and after reading Marnia’s book, she has reinforced to me that yes, orgasm is just as addictive and destructive for women as is for men.

So back to my introducing story about John. (not his real name of course. I get a lot of John’s at the studio) John is a sex addict, a natural ‘junkie’ addicted to the rush of orgasm and dopamine release. (Marnia explains this concept exceptionally well al throughout her book.)

What he experienced when he first started the program was that withholding from ejaculation could keep his drug of choice (dopamine) at high levels. He was on a constant high instead of the rollercoaster ride of high and lows that kept him irritable and moody and craving for more of his fix. With holding from ejaculation is a powerful natural antidepressant and also provides natural pain relief. How amazing is the human body and yet we abuse and misuse our body temple without a second thought. (or maybe because of our extreme focus on pleasure regardless of the consequences)

The next step for John is now to use this powerful energy boost for physical and creative purposes. This is sexual transmutation – the conversion of one energy into another.

Sexual Transmutation is indeed a powerful tool

Sex and sexual energy is such an amazing powerful tool. It can turn your whole world around, turn your whole frame of mind around and it can empower you. Active sexual transmutation is the conversion of energy into action. Sexual energy gives you drive and enthusiasm. Sexual transmutation is using this sexual energy focussing it into action and higher creative outlets.

Marnia does indeed mention Sexual Transmutation in Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow under the chapter TRANSORGASMIC SEX.

“Transorgasmic sex is not a tradition. It’s a model developed by Chilean psychologist Francisco Moreno Tellez. I include his remarks here because he offers a modern approach to an expanded understanding of sexuality.”

“Transorgasmic experience is very different from regular sex because lovers surrender to the pleasure of lovemaking, yet conserve the sexual energy. There is a transscendant and alchemical process of transmutation. We can create a new consciousness; we can move energy and insights from the unconscious body. One feels better and more alive. This is not a theoretical thing.

In contrast, if the ego cannot hold the tension, this energy is discharged. The energy returns to the unconscious without being integrated. The gap between conscious and unconscious widens. The individual has less energy and more confusion. Addiction, compulsive behaviour, violence and other meaningless activities are examples.”

“Transorgasmic sex helps us to understand the true link between sex and spiritual paths. Spiritual practices are also energetic practices. Their goal is to help us use our energy in the service of self development”.

This last statement is pretty much what sexual transmutation is about – using the energy from sex for self development. But first we have to harness it! This means firstly addressing the 2 main issues I see at the studio; sexual repression and sexual addiction. I love life’s challenges!

Inspired Sex Energy - a journey of self awareness

2009-09-04T15:40:00.000-07:00

Sexual transmutation or Inspired Sex Energy is NOT just about the transformation of physical energy. It is a journey of self awareness, the stimulation and transformation of energy into INSPIRATION. In-spiration is about being IN – SPIRIT, your true nature, your true spirit.

Repression and self judgement stifle our true spirit. S.T, or Inspired sex energy awakens an energy that can open our world of inspiration. S.T or Inspired sex energy is like adding water to a flower that has wilted, we return to our natural state of bliss. The hot sun (society) may draw out the moisture and wilt the flower so we have to be sure to keep watering ourself. Top up our souls with inspiration and sex energy to keep our energy high.

When we perceive judgement or rejection/non-acceptance from the world, we can easily turn our thoughts into self judgement. We create stories in our head in reaction to the feedback from the world. We may also react with projecting that self judgement onto others creating and compounding negative memories and energy into our system.

In Power vs Force, Hawkins describes in great detail kinesiology and how things and thoughts calibrate – they either weaken us or strengthen us. Anyone who has dipped their toe into the self development stream may have come across the adage that thoughts either strengthen us or weaken us.

The opposite or strengthening thought to self judgement is self awareness.

So let’s take an alternative reaction to rejection, criticism, outside judgment – self awareness. First we must still our emotional reaction to become more self aware. Easier said than done, we have so many learned reactions. Feel your emotion, acknowledge it, learn from it then put it aside and go deeper. Really enquire.

Question your thoughts.

Ask yourself where they come from. Let go of blame from the outside world. The easiest and most effective way to do this if you need assistance is thought what Byron Katie calls The Work is her book Loving What Is. She has a wonderful way of allowing yourself to purge all your thoughts and emotions then questioning each one, turning them around.

Remember – self awareness strengthens us self judgement weakens us….. But here is the aha-

judgments of others IS self judgement,

and this is profoundly obvious once you go deeply into inquiry with The Work of Byron Katie.

Know thyself – don’t judge thyself.

Life Changing Inspiration

2009-09-01T04:26:00.001-07:00

Yasmin,
Just a short note to say I finished your book on Friday. [The Currency of Sexual Energy]
A great read, a very special way to treat yourself and your partner . It gave me much more detail on what you have emphasised at our sessions. Some things made a lot more sense and it gave me an overall picture of what your ideas (is philosophy the right word?) are all about. I wish I could have read it at the start back last year.

My girlfriend read it at the same time as me and she was impressed as well.

When I suggested, we both try orgasm control as suggested in the book she was amazed and more than pleasantly surprised. She said I am the first male she has ever been with who wanted more than "getting his rocks off". Over the last few days our lovemaking has been much more than sex leading to orgasm. We both went a Saturday night (2 hours) with some pretty intense lovemaking stopping just short of orgasm on three occasions. We were both walking on cloud nine on Sunday. Your ideas really do work.

After a few days of kissing/cuddling and lovemaking without an orgasm (for either of us) she thinks I am the greatest thing since sliced bread. You really have changed my life in more ways than I could possibly have imagined.

We both agreed to try and last until next Saturday without an orgasm. If we can achieve this it is going to be a sensational end to the week.
I haven't felt so contented in I don't know how long.

Thank you.

(name withheld for privacy)

Sex Energy is Life Energy

2009-08-17T16:10:00.000-07:00

Sexual energy is life energy. Sexual energy is creative energy. Where are you focusing your sexual energy?

Activate your sexual energy to activate your intention.

Sexual energy gives us the power of creation, stimulating our creative inner genius, igniting passion for life and living. Use sexual transmutation to infuse your life with sexual energy and let it fill your life with passion.

The conversion of sexual energy to sensual energy takes us to the next level of sexual transmutation and transformation.

Sensual energy is sexual energy filtered through our heart. What we hold in our heart is reflected in our hands.

Sensual energy can then be combined with Intimate Inspirations.
Intimate inspirations are the seeds of inspiration, and intense sensual energy magnifies them, activating them so that they grow deep within the subconscious mind, affecting our life in subtle but magical ways.

The Currency of Sexual Energy

2009-08-12T13:06:00.000-07:00

Available Now!

The publishers have finally delivered my much awaited new book.
It is available at the studio and will be available on line through amazon.com and Borders bookstores.

The Currency of Sexual Energy was written as a supplement to the Inspired Energy Massage Sessions conducted at the studio. The art of sexual transmutation is a modern and natural system of enhancing sex energy.

Our sex energy is our life energy

Our sexual health is just as important as every other aspect of our health and one we tend to put in a box under the bed.

Learn how to infuse your whole being with sex energy so that you can energise your life and stimulate your creativity and passion.

Treating premature ejaculation with antidepressants

2009-07-03T03:31:00.000-07:00

Treating premature ejaculation with antidepressants is like hack sawing off your ankle because you have a sore toe.

In our everyday life we alter the chemistry of our body and our mind with artificial substances. We get up in the morning and stimulate ourselves with coffee or strong black tea. We reach for an energy boost and have a mars bar at morning tea time.

Our day is full of mental over stimulation, the newspaper, the T.V, the radio on the way to work. Our email is full of information to filter though. Our internet gives us the ability to engorge our mind with even more information than our grandfather had to deal with in 5 lifetimes. We de-stress ourselves at night with a glass of scotch.

We build addictions and crave for more instant gratification.
It is no wonder that our sex life suffers. With all this over stimulation you know where I leading to don’t you? Yes - Premature ejaculation comes from over stimulation.

So our smart medical system, (or is it the intelligence of the major drug companies) feed us another chemical (anti depressants) to override our over stimulation and squash our libido enough so we are relieved from premature ejaculation. Great solution don’t you think!

Our bodies and minds are far more amazing that we give them credit. We have within us, an abundance of the most powerful chemicals and hormones that can give us pain relief, that can elevate our moods, that can reduce our blood pressure, that can give us long strong erections and full body orgasms. It is not often that we can experience the ultimate natural high vibrational state because we are too busy using artificial substances and stimulation.

Honour your body and seek an alternative to antidepressants if you suffer from pre-mature ejaculation. The drug companies are rich enough.
Sexual Transmutation, and inspired energy massage is about creating a natural high on life. Re-inspire and re-energise yourself … naturally. It’s simple.

Sexuality and guilt

2009-07-03T02:44:00.000-07:00

Is your service confidential, I don’t want my partner to know I am coming here?

If you feel reservations about a non-sexual service that will enhance and inspire your life and relationship, then pushing through that fear will intensify your courage and inner personal strength. Inspired sex energy is a mind, body, spirit journey. The S.T Studio is not a parlour disguised in a spiritual cloak. Inspiration though pleasure of touch is inspirational, not about gratification and gee I hope the ‘misses’ doesn’t find out.

Yes, our sexual journeys may begin as something very personal and private but ultimately we desire to share our sexuality with those that we love and adore. Do we want to show them a watered down version, one that is acceptable to society and our religious concepts of marriage and conformity?

Guilt imprisons us and our sexual energy. How can the mind and ego be freed and let go completely if there is background guilt?
Fully experiencing sexual energy can not be realised when there is underlying fear or guilt. Full body orgasm is completely letting go of any negative emotions that keep us trapped mentally and physically.

Inspired energy massage (or S.T massage) is improving and enhancing your experience that you will have with your partner. You may not be able to tell her/him about it, then realise you are not free to be all that you want to be.

Question your ideals and your model of relationship/marriage. If we shield our relationship from all that we are, we create a false happiness a conditional happiness that gradually will weaken and crumble, that is if we don’t totally give our soul away trying to make something perfect out of a fabricated utopia.

Let go of shame surrounding sexuality, be brave and test the waters of where you can take your life and zest for life and living. Challenge yourself, inspire your soul. Be open to everything and closed to nothing. It is our thoughts that turn us on. Be turned on by life!

Sex energy is pure divine energy – The energy of sex is divine energy. For love to be profound in your life, let go of the social repressions of sexuality and allow your energy to flourish. The more you accept sex with a quality of sacredness, the more sacred it will become. It is a tremendously valuable energy, the greatest creative power in the universe.

The Currency of Sexual Energy - Book Release

2009-05-24T22:05:00.000-07:00

“The Currency of Sexual Energy” soon to be released.

A fresh and inspiring new book that explores modern sex energy in easy to relate to concepts, “The Currency of Sexual Energy” is a natural approach to enhancing libido for success, creative stimulation, relationships and spiritual growth.
Through a blend of scientific information, self development and awareness and a spiritual inspirational overtone, the author brings about a greater awareness of the concept of sexual transmutation. The transforming of sexual energy is approached from all levels, mind, body and spirit.

This easy to read and relate to guide will teach adults how to master our most powerful source of internal energy- sex drive. Transmutation, the transforming of one form of energy into another, is a technique used by charismatic successful people unconsciously. Learn the secret ingredient that makes a person more notable and magnetic than the average.
Re-inspire your life and bring passion and purpose back into your everyday. Intensify your sexual experience to intensify your life. Your sex energy is your life energy, learn how to take it to a higher level.

Why will this book appeal to readers? What message do you hope to convey?

The subject of sex is still quite taboo in our society today and yet our repression has created an obsession. Curiosity and self awareness has caused people to look more closely at a part of our whole being including sexuality and the link it has to our health, well being and spiritual growth.

Sex, desire and lust are powerful emotions that most adults have struggled with in their life at some stage. The message is don’t suppress it. Enhance, harness and fine tune your sexual energy to keep your life energy naturally high. It is a part of your health, our wellbeing, your success and your spiritual journey.

Quote

Sex and sexual energy is an amazingly powerful tool. It can turn your whole world around, turn your entire frame of mind around, and it can empower you. Sexiness doesn’t need to be affirmed; it isn’t about being adored and satisfied. Sexiness is your attitude to life and to yourself. It is self-respect, self-love, worshipping your own beautiful body temple by keeping it healthy and balanced. Sexual transmutation is the art of stimulating your own sexual energy and then channelling it towards a creative outlet. It is about walking around feeling sexy all day, feeling turned on by life without always needing to be turned on.

Sexual Transmutation is a subject that Napoleon Hill wrote about in his success manual Think and Grow Rich, in 1937. His research uncovered a major factor in successful people is sex drive and the ability to transform sex drive into success.
Napoleon brought Sexual Transmutation to our attention but left a lot of the detail to our own imagination due to society constraints of his era.

With our increasing knowledge and awareness of the human biology, we can now explain physical sexual transmutation in precise chemical detail. Our growing personal development industry and thirst for spiritual awareness has inspired the need to expand this topic to greater depths.

Yasmin has developed a 4 step program designed to teach clients the concepts of enhancing and transforming sex energy through sexual transmutation which she has implemented at The S.T Studio. The transformational results and feedback from clients has been overwhelming.

About the author-

Yasmin has been guiding clients and practitioners in the concepts of inspired sex energy and sexual transmutation for the past 2 years through consultations and sensual energy massage at The S.T Studio. After an 8 year journey of self and spiritual discovery, it became her burning passion to share her inspirations.

‘The Currency of Sexual Energy’ is creative byproduct of embracing the sex energy techniques she actively teaches and writes about. It is her vision and passion to inspire men and women to reignite their life energy by reconnecting with their sexual self and creating deeper interpersonal relationships.

Her back ground in nursing and natural health has provided a template of essential knowledge which she has infused with the inspiration channelled through sex energy. She has an ability to communicate a sensitive and taboo subject and relate to the average person looking for something more out of life and their relationships.

What was your inspiration for writing this book?

After experiencing major life changes triggered by reading Think and Grow Rich, I decided to explore the concept of sexual transmutation in greater depth. Appling these concepts and using sexual energy to stimulate my own creativity, the inspirations written in this book and taught in sessions are the result.
Dealing with many clients over the years, the work and concepts have evolved and continually been refined. With each and every encounter, more is uncovered and discovered.

This is Yasmin’s first book.
Yasmin is also self publishing a range of supplements to the book including: Intimate Inspirations – a set of 70 intention cards, Intimate Inspirational Journal, Intimate Inspiration gift card range.

Love, Jealousy, Ownership

2009-05-24T14:24:00.000-07:00

Let’s look at the emotion of jealousy. You are in a relationship and have a business conference in another city for the weekend. When you return, your lover tell you her stories of what she got up to for the weekend. She went out with friends Saturday night, met a male friend of her best girlfriend and spent Sunday on the beach with them both.

Mmmm….. did you feel that? Yes that little twist in your gut. Was that jealousy? You’ve been working all weekend and here your girlfriend is having fun in the sun with another man! What else really happened? You figure that if you didn’t love her you wouldn’t care, you wouldn’t be jealous. What kind of conditioning is that! Where did jealousy come from? Aren’t you happy for her that she had a great weekend?

We have come to closely associate the emotion of jealousy with being in love or being in a relationship. There is no jealously when a friend finds a new lover, how can jealously be a component of love. It is not, it is a component of ownership and fear of loss.

We are human we have all felt jealousy. I asked myself to become a better person how can I tame the destructive painful emotion of jealousy? How can I understand and be compassionate for those who are jealous of my actions? I have many mentors who I turn to for advice, growth and learning. Osho’s words speak loudly to my soul. I turned to Osho for advice on jealously and found this article. Quite a long article to read but then again jealousy is quite a strong emotion to overcome.

Take the time to understand your self and others, take some time to understand the emotion of jealousy. Here is his article:

http://www.osho.com/magazine/oshointro/VisionIndexDetails.cfm?Vision=jealousy

Jealousy, Love, and Relating in the 21st Century

Osho,
What is jealousy?

Jealousy is one of the most prevalent areas of psychological ignorance about yourself, about others and more particularly, about relationship.

People think they know what love is -- they do not know. And their misunderstanding about love creates jealousy. By `love' people mean a certain kind of monopoly, some possessiveness -- without understanding a simple fact of life: that the moment you possess a living being you have killed him.

Life cannot be possessed. You cannot have it in your fist. If you want to have it, you have to keep your hands open.

But the thing has been going on a wrong path for centuries; it has become ingrained in us so much that we cannot separate love from jealousy. They have become almost one energy.

For example, you feel jealous if your lover goes to another woman. You are disturbed by it now, but I would like to tell you that if you don't feel jealous you will be in much more trouble -- then you will think you don't love him, because if you loved him you should have felt jealous. Jealousy and love have become so mixed up.

In fact, they are poles apart. A mind that can be jealous cannot be loving, and vice-versa: a mind that is loving cannot be jealous.

What is the disturbance? You have to look it as if it is not your question -- somebody else has asked, it is somebody else's problem -- so that you can stand aside and see the whole fabric. The feeling of jealousy is a byproduct of marriage.

In the world of animals, birds, there is no jealousy. Once in a while there is a fight over a love object but a fight is far better than to be jealous, far more natural than to be caught up in jealousy and burn your heart with your own hands.

Marriage is an invented institution, it is not natural; hence nature has not provided a mind that can adjust to marriage. But man found it necessary that there should be some kind of legal contract between lovers, because love itself is dream-stuff, it is not reliable...it is there this moment and the next moment it is gone.

You want to be secure for the coming moment, for your whole future. Right now you are young; soon you will be old and you would like your wife, your husband, to be with you in your old age, in your sickness. But for that, a few compromises have to be made, and whenever there is compromise there is always trouble.

This is the compromise that human beings have made: to be secure about the future, to be certain about the tomorrows, to have a guarantee that the woman who loves you is going to love you forever, that it is not a temporary affair....

That's why religious people say that marriages are "made in heaven"...a strange kind of heaven, because if these marriages are made in heaven, then what can you make in hell? They don't show the signs, the fragrance, the freshness, the beauty of heaven. They are certainly disgusting, ugly...they show something of hell certainly. But man settled for marriage because that was the only way to have private property.

Animals don't have private property -- they are all communists, and far better communists than have appeared in human history. They don't have any dictatorship of the proletariat and they have not lost their freedom, but they don't have any private property.

Man also lived for thousands of years without marriage, but those were the days when there was no private property. Those were the days of hunting; man was a hunter. And those people thousands of years ago had no cold-storage system, no technology -- whatever food they got they had to finish as quickly as possible. They could only hope that tomorrow they will get some food again.

Because there was nothing to accumulate, there was no question of marriage. People lived in communes, tribes; people loved, people reproduced, but in the beginning there was no word for `father'. The word `mother' is far more ancient and far more natural. You will be surprised to know that the word `uncle' is older than the word `father' -- because all the people who were the age of your father...you didn't know who your father was. Men and women were mixing joyously -- without any compulsion, without any legal bondage, out of their free will. If they wanted to meet and be together there was no question of domination. The children never knew who their father was, they knew only their mother. And they knew many men in the tribe; someone amongst those men must have been their father, hence they were all uncles.

As private property came into existence with cultivation.... With hunting, man could not survive long. People have destroyed complete species of animals. Hundreds of species which once used to dance and sing on this earth...man has eaten them up. Something had to be done because hunting was not reliable. Today you may get food, tomorrow you may have to be hungry. And it was very arduous. The search for animals did not allow man to develop any of his other talents, his genius. But cultivation changed the whole life of man.

You must be reminded of the fact that cultivation is the discovery of women, not of men. The woman was confined -- she was not able to go hunting. Most of the time she was pregnant, she was weak, she was carrying another soul within her. She needed care, protection...so she was living in the house. She started making the living space more beautiful -- and this you can see even today, after thousands of years.

If you enter into a bachelor's room you can immediately say that it is a bachelor's room. You may not be able to decide by seeing the bachelor whether he is bachelor or not, but his room certainly is a bachelor! The woman, her touch, is missing. The house of a bachelor is never a home, it is just a place where he sleeps. It is not something with which he feels a certain intimacy, a certain creative relationship.

The home, the village, the city and the whole civilization are because of the woman, because she was free from hunting and she had different values of the heart and of the mind -- she was more aesthetic, more graceful, more earthly, not at all interested in hell and heaven and God and the devil and all that crap! No woman has written a single religious scripture. No woman has been a philosopher thinking about abstract, faraway things.

Woman's consciousness is interested only in the intimate surroundings -- she would like a beautiful house, she would like a beautiful garden. She wants to create a small world of her own -- cozy, comfortable. She imparts a certain quality to a dead house and it becomes a living home. It is a magical transformation.

Man continued to hunt, and the woman started looking around...the man had no time. He has always been busy without business, but the woman had all the time there is. The basic work of hunting was being done by the groups of men and the woman started looking around. She discovered cultivation because she saw wild fruits growing, she saw many other things growing and she also saw that every year the crop dies, the seeds fall back into the earth and when the rains come, again those seeds sprout in thousands of plants. She started experimenting to find what was edible and what was not edible. Soon, as hunting was becoming more and more difficult, men had to agree with women: "We have to shift our whole economic focus. We have to go for cultivation, for fruits, for vegetables. And these are in our hands -- we can produce as much as we want, as we need it, and there is tremendous variety."

Slowly, slowly the nomads, the wandering tribes...because hunters cannot stay in one place. They have to go on moving as the animals escape. Once hunting was dropped and cultivation became our very measure of survival a new thing also happened alongside.

There were people who were powerful people and there were people who were weak people. The people who were physically powerful managed to claim much ground as their property. They earned much...slowly, slowly the barter system started, because when you have too much of one crop, what are you going to do with it? You have to exchange it; then you can have many more things. Life became more complex, with more excitement.

But a problem was felt: after a person dies, who is going to inherit his property? Nobody wanted their property to be inherited by any XYZ. They wanted their property to belong to their own blood.

It is out of economics, not out of the understanding of love that marriage came into existence. Its very birth was wrong, under the wrong stars.

And because man had to agree for marriage.... The woman was very willing for the simple reason that for thousands of years in the hunting period she was not financially a part of the society; man was all. Man continued his power, although the whole social structure changed. The hunter's nomadic life became a peaceful life in a village but man's concern about his property.... He wanted a contract with the woman to be certain that the son she was giving birth to is not somebody else's, but his own. For this simple purpose all the woman's freedom had to be destroyed. She had to live almost like a prisoner, or worse.

Man agreed -- under compulsion, he compromised. If the woman was losing a few things -- her freedom of movement, her freedom in changing lovers -- man was also ready to sacrifice his freedom. They would remain devoted to each other forever.

But it is against nature. Even if you want to do it nature is not going to support you. Nature is for freedom, not for any kind of bondage.

So new problems started arising. Men started finding prostitutes who were no-one's wives, or as it was phrased in India, the prostitute was the wife of the whole town: nagarvadhu. She belongs to anybody, she is a commodity; you have to pay and buy her time and her body. Because of marriage it was very difficult to find married women because then there were more complexities: they had their husbands.... Prostitutes were good.

And you will be surprised to know that in India every city had its topmost prostitute -- she was the most beautiful girl born in that city. Because she was so beautiful it was not right to let her get married to one person, she had to be shared. She was so beautiful that if she got married there would be trouble, there would be problems -- people would go on falling in love with her. It was better to keep her free for anybody who would pay.

Marriage created suspicion. The husband was always suspicious about whether the child born to them was his own or not. And the problem is, the father had no way to determine that a child was his own. Only the mother knew. Because the father had no way of being certain, he created more and more walls around the woman -- that was the only possibility, the only alternative -- to disconnect her from the larger humanity. Not to educate her, because education gives wings to people, thoughts, makes people capable of revolt, so no education for women. No religious education for women, because religion makes you saints, holy people and it has been a male-dominated society for centuries and man cannot conceive a woman to be higher and holier than himself.

Man has been cutting from the very roots any possibility of woman's growth. She is just a factory to manufacture children. She has not been accepted by any culture in the world as equal to man. There are even cultures like the Chinese which have denied the soul to woman; woman is only a machine, without a soul.

In China you could kill your wife, no law existed against it. The wife was your possession and if you wanted to destroy it, it was nobody's business to prevent it.

All over the world the woman has been suppressed. The more she has been suppressed, the more her whole energy has turned sour. And because she has no freedom and man has every freedom, all her repressed emotions, feelings, thoughts -- her whole individuality turns into a jealous phenomenon. She is continuously afraid that her husband might leave her, might go to some other woman, might become interested in some other woman. He might abandon her, and she has problems: she is not educated, she is not financially capable of standing on her own feet. She has been brought up in such a way that she cannot go into the world; she has been told from the very beginning that she is weak....

Indian scriptures say that in childhood the father should protect the girl; in youth the husband should protect the girl; in old age the son should protect the woman. She has to be protected from the very childhood to the grave. She cannot revolt against this male chauvinist society. All she can do is go on finding faults, which are bound to be there. Mostly she is not wrong; she is mostly right.

Whenever a man falls in love with another woman something in him towards the first woman changes. Now they are again strangers, there is no bridge. She has been crippled, enslaved and now she has been abandoned. Her whole life is a life of agony.

Out of this agony arises jealousy. Jealousy is the anger of the weak -- one who cannot do anything but is boiling within, who would like to burn the whole world but cannot do anything except cry and scream and throw tantrums.

This situation will continue until marriage becomes a museum piece.

Now there is no need for marriage. Perhaps it was useful. Perhaps it was not useful, but it was only an excuse to enslave the woman. Things could have been worked out in a different way, but there is no point in going into the past.

Right or wrong, one thing is good about the past: it is no more.

As far as the present and the future are concerned, marriage is absolutely irrelevant, inconsistent with human evolution and contradictory to all the values we love -- freedom, love, joy.

Because man wanted the woman to be completely imprisoned, he wrote religious scriptures making her afraid of hell, making her greedy for heaven...if she follows the rules. Those rules exist only for women, not for men. Now it is so clear that to let women live any longer in this poisonous situation of jealousy is against their psychological health.

And women's psychological health influences the pyschological health of the whole of humanity -- man is also born of woman. The woman has to become an independent individual.

The dissolution of marriage will be a great, festive event on the earth -- and nobody is preventing you: if you love your wife or your husband you can live for lives together, nobody is preventing you. Withdrawing marriage is simply giving you your individuality back. Now nobody possesses you.

You are not to make love to a man just because he is your husband and he has the right to demand it. In my vision, when a woman makes love to a man because she has to make love, it is prostitution -- not retail, but wholesale!

Retail is better, you have a chance to change. This wholesale prostitution is dangerous, you don't have a chance to change. And you have married for the first time -- you should be given chances because you are an amateur. A few marriages at least will help you to become mature; perhaps then you can find the right woman. And by right woman I don't mean the woman who is "made for you."

No woman is made for you and no man is made for any woman. By the right woman or the right man I mean that if you have understood a few relationships, if you have been in a few relationships, you will understand what things create miserable situations amongst you and what situations create a loving, peaceful, happy life. Living with different people is an absolutely necessary education for a right life as far as love is concerned.

You should first graduate from a few relationships. In your college, in your university you should pass through a few relationships. And you should not be in a hurry to decide -- there is no need, the world is big, and each individual has some unique quality and beauty.

As you go through a few relationships you start becoming aware of what kind of woman, what kind of man is going to be a friend to you -- not a master, not a slave. And friendship needs no marriage because friendship is far higher.

You are feeling jealous because that jealousy you have received as an inheritance. With me you will have to change many things -- not because I say to change them but because you understand that a drastic change is needed.

For example, the idea has been spread all over the world that if a husband sometimes goes to some other woman then this is going to destroy the marriage. It is absolutely wrong. On the contrary, if every marriage has the weekend free it will cement your relationship more strongly, because your marriage is not disturbing your freedom, because your wife understands the need for variety. These are human needs.

The priests and the moralists and the puritans first decide on an ideal. They make beautiful ideals and then they force the idea on you, for you to become like the ideals. They want to make you all idealists. For ten thousand years we have lived under a very dark and dismal shadow of idealism.

I am a realist. I don't have any ideal. To me, to understand reality and to go with reality is the only right way for any intelligent man or woman.

My understanding is -- and it is based on thousands of experiments -- that if marriage is not such a tight thing, rigid, but is flexible, just a friendship...so that a woman can tell you she has met a beautiful young man and she is going this weekend to be with him -- "And if you are interested I can bring him back with me, you will also love the person." And if the husband can say, not as a hypocrite but as an authentic human being, that "Your joy, your happiness is my happiness. If you have found someone, forget about the house, I will take care. You enjoy, because I know whenever you come back, enjoying a fresh love will make you fresh also. A fresh love will bring fresh youth to you. You go this week, and next week I may have my own program."

This is friendship. And when they come home they can talk about what kind of man she met, how he turned out, that it was not that great.... You can tell her about the new woman you have met.... You have a shelter in the home. You can go once in a while into the sky, wild and free, and come back and always your wife is there waiting for you -- not to fight but to share your adventures.

It simply needs a little understanding. It has nothing to do with religion, but just a little more intelligent behavior.

You know perfectly well that howsoever beautiful a man or woman might be, she starts becoming heavy on your nerves sooner or later. Because the same geography, the same topography, the same landscape....

Man's mind is not made for monotony; neither it is made for monogamy. It is absolutely natural to ask for variety. And it is not against your love. In fact, the more you know other women, the more you will praise your own woman -- your understanding will deepen. Your experience will be enriching...the more you have known a few men, the more accurately you will be able to understand your own husband.

The idea of jealousy will disappear -- you both are free, and you are not hiding anything.

With friends we should share everything, particularly those moments which are beautiful -- moments of love, moments of poetry, moments of music...they should be shared. In this way your life will become more and more rich. You may become so attuned to each other that you live your whole life together, but there is no marriage.

Jealousy will persist as long as marriage remains the basic foundation of society.

Just give the man, with your full heart, absolute freedom. And tell him he need not hide anything: "To hide anything is insulting. That means you don't trust me." And the same has to happen to man, that he can say to his wife: "You are as independent as I am. We are together to be happy, we are together to grow into more blissfulness. And we will do everything for each other but we are not going to be jailers to each other."

Giving freedom is a joy, having freedom is a joy. You can have so much joy, but you are turning that whole energy into misery, into jealousy, into fight, into a continuous effort to keep the other under your thumb.

I have heard about a man who was in utter rage and despair because of his wife's behavior. It was not her fault...she was a nymphomaniac. Now what can you do? Somebody has a headache, somebody is a nymphomaniac. She was continuously falling in love with anybody! He took her to the doctor.

She was a beautiful woman. The doctor asked her to go inside the examination room. He went with her and soon, after a few minutes, moans and groans...and the husband was sitting in the office listening -- it was too much! He just entered the room and what he saw he could not believe -- the doctor was making love to his wife.the husband said, "What is happening?"

The wife said, "You idiot, you will never understand. Now you are asking what is happening! Can't you see?"

But the husband was furious. He said, "I am not asking my wife, I am asking you, doc! What is happening?"

The doctor said, "Nothing is happening, John, you are doing everything. I am simply taking her temperature."

John was afire. He had suffered so much and even the doctor...and what nonsense is he talking, that he is taking her temperature? So he took out his switchblade knife and started rubbing the knife against the doctor's shoulder. The doctor said, "What do you mean? What are you doing?"

He said, "Nothing. Just be careful. When that thing comes out, remember -- it had better have numbers on it!"

We have created this circus instead of a culture. It goes on and on in different ways. I hope that in your life you can drop being a part of this stupid game.

And it is easy: if you understand yourself, you will be able to understand your wife too. Don't you have other women in your dreams? In fact, to see your own wife in a dream is a rare phenomenon. People never see their wives or their husbands in their dreams. They have seen enough of them! Now even in the night, even in the dream, no freedom....

In your dreams you have the wives of your neighbors, the husbands of your neighbors...you should understand that somehow we have made a wrong society, a society which is not according to human nature. The desire for variety is an essential quality in anyone who is intelligent. The more intelligent you are the more variety you would like -- there is some relationship between intelligence and variety. A buffalo is satisfied with one kind of grass; for her whole life she will not touch another kind of grass. She does not have the mind to change, to know new things, to discover new territories, to adventure into new spaces.

The poets, the painters, the dancers, the musicians, the actors -- you will find these people more loving but their love is not focused on individuals. They are more loving but to as many individuals as they come in contact with. They are the intelligent people, they are our creative part.

Idiots don't want to change anything. They are afraid of change because any change means you will have to learn something again. The idiot wants to learn something once and remain with it his whole life. It may be a machine, it may be a wife, it may be a husband -- it does not matter. You have known one woman, you know her nagging, you have become accustomed...sometimes not only accustomed, you have become addicted too. If suddenly your woman does not nag you, you will not be able to sleep that night -- what happened? What has gone wrong?

One of my friends was continually complaining to me about his wife; "She is always sad, long faced and I am so worried to enter the house...I try to waste my time in this club and that club but finally I have to go back home and there she is."

I said to him, "Do one thing just as an experiment. Because she has been serious and she has been nagging, I cannot imagine that you enter the house smiling."

He said, "Do you think I can manage that? The moment I see her something freezes inside me -- smile?"

I said, "Just as an experiment. Today you do one thing: take beautiful roses -- it is the season; and the best ice-cream available in the city -- tutti frutti; and go smiling, singing a song!"

He said, "If you say so I will do it, but I don't think it is going to make any difference."

I said, "I will come behind you, and see whether there is any difference or not."

The poor fellow tried hard. Many times on the way he laughed. I said, "Why are you laughing?"

He said, "I am laughing at what I am doing! I wanted you to tell me to divorce her and you have suggested I act as if I am going on a honeymoon!"

I said, "Just imagine it is a honeymoon...but try your best."

He opened the door and his wife was standing there. He smiled and then he laughed at himself because to smile...And that woman was standing almost like a stone. He presented the flowers and the ice-cream, and then I entered.

The woman could not believe what was happening. When the man had gone to the bathroom she asked me, "What is the matter? He has never brought anything, he has never smiled, he has never taken me out, he has never made me feel that I am loved, that I am respected. What magic has happened?"

I said, "Nothing; both of you have just been doing wrong. Now when he comes out of the bathroom you give him a good hug."She said, "A hug?"

I said, "Give him one! You have given him so many things, now give him a good hug, kiss him.... "She said, "My God...."

I said, "He is your husband, you have decided to live together. Either live joyously or say good-bye joyously. There is no reason...it is such a small life. Why waste two person's lives unnecessarily?"

At that very moment the man came from the bathroom. The woman hesitated a little but I pushed her, so she hugged the man and the man became so afraid he fell on the floor! He had never imagined that she was going to hug him. I had to help him up. I said, "What happened?"

He said, "It's just that I have never imagined that this woman can hug and kiss -- but she can! And when she smiled she looked so beautiful."

Two persons living together in love should make it a point that their relationship is continuously growing, bringing more flowers every season, creating more joys. Just sitting together silently is enough....

But all this is possible only if we drop the old idea of marriage. More than friendship is unnatural. And if marriage is stamped by the court, is killed under that stamp in the court.... You cannot bring love under the rule of law.

Love is the ultimate law. You just have to discover its beauties, its treasures. You have not to repeat, parrot-like, all the great values which make man the highest expression of consciousness on this planet. You should exercise them in your relationship.

And this has been my strange experience: if one partner starts moving on the right lines, the other follows sooner or later. Because they both are hungry for love, but they don't know how to approach it.

No university teaches that love is an art and that life is not already given to you; that you have to learn from scratch.

And it is good that we have to discover by our own hands every treasure that is hidden in life...and love is one of the greatest treasures in existence.

But instead of becoming fellow travelers in search of love, beauty and truth, people are wasting their time in fighting, in jealousy.

Just become a little alert and start the change from your side -- don't expect it from the other side. It will begin from the other side too. And it costs nothing to smile, it costs nothing to love, it costs nothing to share your happiness with somebody you love.

Osho,
And what is love?

Love is the only religion, the only God, the only mystery that has to be lived, understood.

When love is understood, you have understood all the mystics of the world.

It is not anything difficult. It is as simple as your heartbeats or your breathing. It comes with you, it is not given to you by the society. And this is the point that I want to emphasize: love comes with your birth -- but of course it is undeveloped as everything else is undeveloped. The child has to grow.

The society takes the advantage of the gap. The child's love will take time to grow; meanwhile the society goes on conditioning the mind of the child with ideas about love which are false. By the time you are ready to explore the world of love, you are filled with so much rubbish about love that there is not much hope for you to be able to find the authentic and discard the false.

For example, every child everywhere has been told in a thousand and one ways that love is eternal: once you love a person you love the person always. If you love a person and later on you feel that you don't love, it only means you never loved the person in the first place. Now this is a very dangerous idea. It is giving you an idea of a permanent love and in life nothing is permanent...the flowers blossom in the morning and by the evening they are gone.

Life is a continuous flux; everything is changing, moving. Nothing is static, nothing is permanent. You have been given the idea of a permanent love which is going to destroy your whole life. You will expect permanent love from the poor woman, and the woman will expect permanent love from you. Love becomes secondary, permanence becomes primary.

And love is such a delicate flower that you cannot force it to be permanent. You can have plastic flowers; that's what people have -- marriage, their family, their children, their relatives, everything is plastic.

Plastic has one very spiritual thing: it is permanent.

Real love is as uncertain as your life is uncertain.

You cannot say that you will be here tomorrow. You cannot even say that you are going to survive the next moment. Your life is continuously changing -- from childhood to youth, to middle age, to old age, to death, it goes on changing. A real love will also change.

It is possible that if you are enlightened your love has gone beyond the ordinary laws of life. It is neither changing nor permanent, it simply is. It is no more a question of how to love -- you have become love itself, so whatever you do is loving. It is not that you specifically do something which is love -- whatever you do, your love starts pouring through it.

But before enlightenment your love is going to be the same as everything else: it will change.

If you understand that it will change, that once in a while your wife may become interested in somebody and you have to be understanding and loving and caring and allowing her to go the way her being feels...this is a chance for you to prove to your wife that you love her. You love her -- even if she is going to love somebody else, that is irrelevant. With understanding, it is possible that your love may become a lifelong affair, but remember it will not be permanent. It will have its ups and downs, it will have changes.

It is so simple to understand. When you started loving you were too young, with no experience; how can your love remain the same when you have become a mature person? Your love will also attain to some maturity.

And when you have become old your love will have a different flavor to it. Love will go on changing and once in a while love will need just an opportunity for change. In a healthy society it will be possible and yet your relationship with someone will not be broken.

But it is possible that you may have to change your lovers many times in life. There is no harm in it. In fact, by changing your lovers many times in life you will be enriched, and if the whole world follows what I am saying to you about love, the whole world will be enriched.

But a wrong idea has destroyed all possibility. The moment your partner looks at somebody -- just looking, and his eyes show attraction and you freak out. You have to understand that if the man drops being interested in beautiful women on the road, in beautiful actresses in the movies.... That's what you want; you want him not to be interested in anything except you. But you don't understand human psychology. If he is not interested in women on the road, in the movies, why will he be interested in you? His interest in women is a guarantee that he is interested in you, that there is still a possibility that your love can go on and on.

But we are doing just the opposite. Men are trying so that their women should not be interested in anybody other than themselves; they should be the only focus, her total concentration. The woman is asking the same, and both are driving each other mad. Concentration on one person is bound to lead you into madness.

For a lighter life, for a more playful life, you need to be flexible. You have to remember that freedom is the highest value and if love is not giving you freedom then it is not love. Freedom is a criterion:

Anything that gives you freedom is right, and anything that destroys your freedom is wrong.

If you can remember this small criterion your life, slowly, slowly will start settling on the right path about everything -- your relationships, your meditations, your creativity, whatever you are.

Dropping old concepts, ugly concepts.... For example, in this country, millions have died by jumping alive into the funeral pyre with their husbands. It shows that the possessiveness of the husband is so much that not only does he want to possess the woman while he is alive, he is afraid of what will happen when he is dead! He will not be able to do anything -- it is better to take the woman with him.

And you can see that this was applicable only to women -- not a single man has jumped into the funeral pyre of a woman in ten thousand years. What does it mean? Does it mean that only women love men and men do not love women? Does it mean that the woman has no life of her own? Only the husband's life is her life -- when the husband is dead, she has to be dead.

Such nonsense ideas have settled in our heads. You have to do continuous cleaning -- whenever you see some nonsense in your head, clean it, throw it away.

If you are clear and clean in the mind you will be able to find solutions for every problem that arises in your life.
Osho,
Sermons in Stones,Chapter 13

Copyright © 2009 Osho International Foundation

SYSTEM in dealing with lust

2009-05-18T03:51:00.000-07:00

We can convert lust into something more healthy, maybe even love but first awareness is essential.

Bring about awareness especially recalling moments of initial lust. What triggered it? Many people can remember the very moment they fell ‘in love’ (translate lust). Did they reject your advances or affection at any stage? That’ll certainly do it! Our ego likes a challenge and wants what it think it can’t have.

Do you feel like you need this person? Why? What is in their persona that you may be lacking or craving in your life?

Are you addicted to the chemical rush of lust?

We become addicted because it feels good. We lose addictions when we find out it feels better not to be addicted. It feels far more empowering to know that we have control. Addictions control our mind and our actions. To be released from addictions is to be released from a prison.

Do you like feeling the dizziness of desire and being turned on at the thought of that person?

Are your feelings towards this person intense desire? Do you long to be with them? Is it an obsession? Do you have them on a pedestal?

Ok now what? How do we let go of the turmoil of lust? We need to go deeply into the feelings and there may be love underneath the chemical addiction and psychological need. Still the ego, not an easy thing to do. Love does not need to possess. The lust driven ego needs achievement and possession. It is insecure and needs to own a person.

Know the heart. Feel what is in their heart, not what you see in their actions, reactions and words. Two hearts in love will vibrate at the same frequency. They will not demand or need words of love. Just being around each other feels good because hearts are in sync. Go deeply and if you feel love emanating, let this be enough. Hold on to that knowing instead of the hope that love will keep the ego happy fulfilling expectations. Love is peace.

Question your demands and expectations. “If she/he loved me he would call more often.” Do you really know that to be true? Love reaches you beyond phone calls. “If she/he loved me he would show me more respect.” Turn that one around first by showing yourself more respect. She/he is only mirroring your own self respect and respect for themself.

Join the person you have on the pedestal. What put them up there and embrace those qualities.

Love reminds us that we are all connected. Yes you do not have to limit love to one person. Love the one you are with and those you aren’t and you may even find that the love you have for those not with you is even more pure.

Have you ever felt that your love/lust was unrequited?
This last message quoted from TUT - theuniverse@tut.com, may sound a little cryptic but it really is a powerful "Aha!"

"If you could actually stand in someone else's shoes, to hear what they hear, see what they see, and feel what they feel, you would honestly wonder what planet they live on, and be totally blown away by how different their "reality" is from yours.

You'd also never, in a million years, be quick to judge again.
Just sayin'
The Universe"

Retrieve your energy. Call your spirit back from the magnetic force of lust. Turn it all around with this self question - "Am I coming from a place of NEED (ego) or DISCOVERY (spirit)?" Need is taking energy. Discovery is sharing energy. Need is gratification, discovery is inspiration.

The Sexual Transmutation of Lust

2009-05-18T03:15:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been driven crazy with desire for someone? You think about them all the time, fantasise about a life together? Is there someone you find your self getting tongue tied around, nervous, lose all your sensibility about yourself? Our lust tends to intensify when we are not noticed or rejected by the object of our desire. We easily misinterpret lust for love with very little information or interaction with a person.

Lust comes from the ego, where as love feels from the heart.

Love is peaceful, lust creates inner turmoil, discomfort and pain. It is the pain that asks us to grow in awareness. Lust calls for sexual transmutation into spiritual growth or it will keep you in a continuos cycle of being in and out of lust, never finding paradise or realising the love that may be hidden behind the lust. The chemical addiction that lust creates can cloud the love that is growing in the heart.

Showering someone with words of gooey affection and self sacrifice, “I would die for you” is buttering up the ego, not reaching the heart. It is placing the object of your desire on a pedestal and lowering your self worth. You are basing your own self worth on the conditions of the return of your affection. This is setting your self up for pain and a broken heart (broken ego really).

The person who we have on a pedestal and are proclaiming our undying love, does not feel our love fully when we are targeting the ego. Deep down, their heart knows what they see is neediness, not love. It can repel and repulse the receiver of too much affection because intuition can see through false love. True love let’s go and let’s be.

If you do win someone over through targeting the ego, only neediness will be returned, not the true love you are seeking. By seeking you are pushing it further away.

Love that comes from the heart is still. It does not need affirmations or gifts, it is just happy being, existing. Love does not ‘need’. It is most powerful when both hearts know they are sharing the same vibrations just by being around each other. An inner knowing brings an unshakable peace. Love that comes from the heart, doesn’t need words and words can hardly describe the level that love can take you.

Lust is a form of obsession. Osho tells us to meditate on our obsessions.

So if you have any obsession, don't call names. The moment you call it an obsession you have already started condemning it. And if you condemn something you cannot watch it -- you are prejudiced against it. How can you watch the enemy? No need to condemn; whatsoever is the case is the case. Just by condemning it you can't change it; by condemning it you can only repress it. You can avoid seeing it, but the wound will continue; it will become cancerous, it will go on growing inside.

Rather than condemning it, rather than calling it names, giving it labels, watch it -- without any conclusion. See what it is. See as deeply as possible, with great friendliness towards it, with intimacy. It is YOUR obsession, YOUR wound! It says something about you, it is part of your biography. It has arisen in you, just as flowers arise in trees. It is essential because it says something about your past. Go deep into it, with care, with love, and you will be surprised: the more care you show about it, the less it hurts, the less it dominates, the less it forces itself upon you.

Yes, in a certain way, enjoy it! But by enjoying I don't mean become identified with it. If you become identified with it you go insane. If you condemn it, if you repress it, you go insane again. Avoid both the extremes. Keep yourself exactly in the middle, neither condemning nor identifying. Just be a pure witness.
And slowly slowly, it will be healed. Slowly slowly, it will lose all its poison. Slowly slowly, you will see it changing into a positive energy rather than a negative force. It will become helpful. Each obsession is a knot in your being. Once it is opened, great energy is released.

Love, don't get too close

2009-05-07T14:51:00.000-07:00

Has your heart ever been broken? Well if you have survived puberty the answer to this should be yes. What is our reaction when we do get our heart broken… or ego damaged in reality, is to lick our wounds, cry and stamp our feet, label our lost love, “the one” and go sulk in a corner. We retract our heart and try not to get too close.

Maybe this is a good thing, not getting too close. Getting too close creates a relationship, expectations, hope for the perfect future. When we engage without getting too close maybe somehow we can maintain a best mateship. Mates seem to command more respect and consideration than love relationships. When we try to turn love into a relationship, we bring in expectations and the need to control.

Our insecurity and lack of self identity causes us to forfeit self respect in order to be loved by someone to create a relationship. We get wrapped up in societies expectations and create marriages to help our insecurities and prop up our identity.

I enjoy the philosophies of Osho and this quote from him describes love and relationship beautifully….

The moment love becomes a relationship it becomes bondage, because there are expectations, there are demands and there are frustrations, and an effort from both sides to dominate. It becomes a struggle for power. Relationship is not the right thing. But love as a state of being is totally different. It means you are simply loving; you are not creating a relationship out of it. Love is like the fragrance of a flower. It does not create a relationship, it does not ask you to behave in a certain way, to act in a certain way. It demands nothing. It simply shares. And in sharing also there is no desire for any reward. The sharing itself is the reward. When love becomes like a fragrance to you, then it has tremendous beauty. And something that is far above the so-called humanity— it has something of the divine.
OSHO – Freedom

What about the dream of finding a soul mate? Why do we get caught up in finding our soul mate? Maybe our soul mate is our best mate. Maybe free love is the way to go so we can have many soul mates. Just food for thought, then no hearts are broken, maybe egos offended but they seem to recover quicker. Our ego is pretty resilient.

And is ego really a dirty word? I don’t thinks so, it serves a purpose in helping us get by in this crazy world. Consider your ego as a safety line, the line that takes all the weight (a fuse) that breaks to protect the heart from actually breaking.

The drug called lust

2009-05-07T03:54:00.000-07:00

Lust…. It’s a drug as addictive and thrilling as heroine.
We like the buzz that comes with thoughts of admiring someone usually from a distance with very little information or knowledge about them. Mystery deepens the desire. We drive ourselves crazy with desire, yearning and fantasies, then our egos get hurt and we think it is our heart that is breaking.

Getting high on sexual energy through the flightiness of lust is addictive. It is like taking a hit of an illicit drug, albeit natural (so it must be good for us) but just like any drug, natural or not, there are side effects. Drugs alter our perception, our judgment our stable frame of mind as too does lust.

When do we get over it? Usually when someone gets hurt, then we discover it feels better not to be in lust anymore. It turns it head and bites us, and we bleed. (it’s our ego remember, not out heart).

With any addiction, we some how forget about the side effects and get hooked on the high, coming back for a second round in different circumstances. Once again, when do we get over it? When we finally realise it feels better not to be addicted.

So how can we convert lust into empowering energy instead of fantasising about converting into love? Let’s take a close look at our heart. It is a great filter for sexual energy. When we have sex, make love, we share our energy through our heart as well as our genitals.

Hold in your heart, gratitude – gratitude that you can feel so turned on…
Appreciation – for being alive, and being able to feel all that we can feel…
Humility – to ground the ego… we don’t want to kill it completely, it does play a role in protecting us…

And self respect! This is a big one… we tend to let self respect fly out the window when we are focused on the object of lust. Really absorb what this means for you… self respect… then listen and open your eyes and really see the object of your desire in all their duality. Yin and yang, everything has opposites. All that you lust and admire has a dark side… be prepared.

On the chemical level getting back to the similarity of lust being an illicit drug, how much dopamine and over stimulation can your mind and body handle! Balance it with some oxytocin, go hug a tree or pat a cat, or get a massage. Oxytocin, the cuddle drug soothes and calms the over stimulation of dopamine. And if you really do want the buzz of a natural drug, go stimulate some adrenaline and jump off a cliff (with a harness on of course!) or join the circus, flying trapeze is so much fun!

Sexual transmutation of lust…..

Creative illumination through sex energy techniques

2009-04-24T17:21:00.000-07:00

How can I use sexual transmutation to stimulate my creative side?

Sublimation or Sexual Transmutation can be used in a similar way as NLP or neuro-linguistic programming. It is about creating a heightened state of arousal and using this altered state to tap into the subconscious mind. This has the effect of being able to redirect your life in a subtle but magical way.

Highly charged emotions cause us to store events and thoughts in the subconscious. The emotion of sexual arousal is an intense positive emotion. Combine this with a positive intention during arousal and this acts like a magnifying class which etches the intention into the subconscious mind. The energy is sublimated or focused into creative energy.

The process involves taking sexual activity to a level beyond pure physical sex. An altered state is created when sex becomes a moving meditation. The focus of sexual arousal needs to be distributed around the body to ignite the whole being. When we focus on the pleasure parts and genitals, the pressure builds and we expel the energy through orgasm. When we let go of our learned way of heating up the genitals during sexual activity, we can bring our awareness to experience the affect that sexual energy has on our whole body, our whole being.

Create an intention before you engage in any kind of sexual activity. Hold this intention in your mind as you begin to feel ‘turned on’.
Keep notes and journal your thoughts that are ignited after you are aroused and when you are in an aroused state.
The significance of maintaining ejaculation control for men is that it helps maintain the ‘energy’ or the state of arousal that stimulates the mind and creativeness.

What being rich turely means

2009-04-23T17:20:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3d3l9WG6SXQ