Art Therapy for a Re-Discovered Artist

Happy birthday Lynn! I'll miss & love you always...

2011-02-13T03:08:00.009-05:00

Photo Lynn took for Mother's Day 2005

1 of countless guardian angel ornaments decorating our mother's Christmas tree this year. 1 of the things Lynn & I most looked forward to during the holidays as children was when we all decorated our tree together while listening to Christmas music.

The start of Lynn's garden made for her by our mother

Lynn's painting behind the angel gift I gave our mom

There's no better description for Lynn

Although she passed at 43 on Oct. 15, 2006, today would have been my oldest sister's 48th birthday. Without her here, there is still a void in my life that cannot be described or filled. Despite all the times I'd cry when she got a spanking...and she'd laugh when I got them...Despite the numerous other mean things she'd sometimes do...the gut-wrenching yelling & countless times I wanted to stop speaking to her...forever...but she'd always get me to forgive her...Despite all the jealousies & sibling rivalry...a sister is one you can never stop loving...for long. She's the one who chased a friend with a baseball bat when she thought he'd made me cry...despite how many times she'd done it. She's the one who would tell me in disgust to "stop being a baby" as our Greyhound bus drove us further away from our mother each summer--as she wiped her own tears & then let me lay my head on her shoulder or lap to fall asleep...then, during car rides, & while watching TV...She's the one who'd yell at me one minute & be sweet as pie the next...One year, our mother bought us each a sibling rivalry Christmas ornament. (We don't know what happened to hers.) I'm so glad we made amends & though there were still always some times of closeness as children, we really became closer than ever in our last decade together, after my middle sister passed. I know that come spring, she'll be amongst the butterflies fluttering about our yard and gardens, including the one seen here that our mother made for her the spring before she passed so she could view it, even once bedridden. I know she is as happy-go-lucky where she is now, as she usually was when here, and I know (since she told me shortly before leaving), that this guardian angel wants nothing more than for me to be happy as well...

See Which Famous People Have Purchased Art from My Cousin Harry Lee--& Why He Should be Famous Himself

2011-02-12T23:00:00.008-05:00

How many people do you know that are paralyzed from the waist down, who have still managed to compete in special olympics, earn a living through art, give art/history presentations at schools, teach Sunday school, take martial arts, lift weights at a gym, drive his own customized van--cross country selling his art at various shows, and inspire a whole town to get on board with making more public places accessible to the physically challenged --before this was required? Well now you do. His paintings range from religious to sports, music, African/ethnic, Americana, and seascapes/landscapes. To see more of his art than the piece below, and to purchase some, either go to his website at
http://davisartstudio.net/Homepage.html or, look for Harry L. Davis amongst the Wilmington Art Group on their facebook page

Below is just some of the additional 411 online about him, stemming from the UNCW library, but one amendment is that Oprah Winfrey owns none of his work (that he knows of) but actresses Halley Berry and the late Nell Carter, actors Denzel Washington and Bill Cosby, plus African-American novelist Gloria Naylor are amongst those who do:

MS125
Harry Lee Dav is
Harry L. Davis, born in Wilmington, NC, is a self taught artist and operates the Davis Studio in Wilmington. Davis is an oil painter whose use of bold bright colors and his attention to detail has become his trademark. Davis focuses mainly on African American heritage and culture and his paintings have included themes such as African/Tribal, Americana, Spiritual and Boxers.
Although he drew as a child, Davis had no formal art training. After an accident while a member of the 82nd Airborne Davis used painting as a form of therapy. Since then he has built a successful career and his paintings are owned by celebrities such as Denzel Washington, Oprah Winfrey and Bill Cosby and institutions such as University of North Carolina at Wilmington, Home Savings and Loan Association, Wilmington and the Stout Vocational Rehabilitation Institute at the University of Wisconsin, Monomania, WI.
Davis has exhibited his work all over the United States in cities such as Boston, Chicago, Atlanta and New Orleans. Davis has also been working with North Carolina students since 1988 to help teach them about art and African culture. In 2001 he was named the Man of the Year by the Town Hall Community Education and Cultural Center in Wilmington.
This collection is a reflection of his artistic career featuring newspaper clippings, correspondence with celebrities and children and publications featuring his work.
This collection has been designated Accession number 125 of the Manuscripts Collection, Special Collections Department, William Madison Randall Library, University of North Carolina at Wilmington, 601 South College Road Wilmington, North Carolina 28403-3297.
There are no access restrictions on this collection.
Processed by Mary Katherine M. Abbott
Manuscripts Collection
William Madison Randall Library
The University of North Carolina Wilmington
Summer 2006
Inventory
Manuscript/Box/File
125/1/1Newspaper Clippings
125/1/2Wayne County Public Schools Correspondence, related to a visit from Davis
125/1/3Correspondence referring to his work including names such as Oprah Winfrey, Spike Lee and Gloria Naylor
125/1/4Contracts and Agreements
125/1/559th North Carolina Azalea Festival, 2006, cover designed by Davis, see p. 9
125/1/6Web Print out from "The Virtual Muse," Davis' website featuring his work
125/1/7Programs and Advertisements for Harry Davis exhibitions and work
125/1/8Program referring to Davis as Man of the Year, 2001
125/1/9Publication, Indulge, Vol. XI, Issue 1, mentions Davis p. 9
125/1/10Publication, U.S. Art, Vol. 6 # 4, p. 60 Davis' art featured in article about boxing
125/1/11
Art exhibition brochures for 2006 NC Azalea Festival, The Event, and Art on the River; email correspondence
125/1/12
Newspaper Clippings, 2005
125/2/1
Prints by Harry Davis, all with Certificate of Limited Edition

Wodaabe Herdsman 124/200
The Baptism 271/500
Southern Legacy 157/300
Hausa Chieftain 322/750
Akie Tracker 144/300
After The Drought Artist Proof One of 20
Desert Charge 48/500 (Map Drawer 18)

COPYRIGHT: Retained by the authors of items in these papers, or their descendants, as stipulated by United States copyright law.

My Cousin's Sept. 11th Memorial Artwork Won Him a Place in His Local Newspaper

2011-02-12T18:15:00.005-05:00

Here Now - Local artist finds a way to connect with others

Photo by Mike Spencer

Buy photo

Rachard McIntyre, 31, is a man with Asperger’s syndrome, who creates hand drawn portraits and sells his art at the Riverfront Farmer’s Market.

By Si Cantwell
Si.Cantwell@StarNewsOnline.com

Published: Saturday, February 5, 2011 at 3:30 a.m.
Last Modified: Friday, February 4, 2011 at 9:20 p.m.

Rachard McIntyre 31, has Asperger’s syndrome, a type of autism. But don’t define him by his disability.

McIntyre is an artist. He sells his works at Wilmington’s Riverfront Farmer’s Market every other Saturday during the season, which begins April 2.

“In Memory of the Twin Towers” is a series of five poster-sized works of the New York towers destroyed on Sept. 11, 2001, drawn with the handwritten names of the victims.

“Word Play and the Eiffel Tower” depicts the famous Paris landmark in facts and sentences about the tower. It’s beautiful to look at and interesting to read.

McIntyre has books filled with pencil drawings of famous people: Marilyn Monroe, Ava Gardner, Jackie Robinson, David Copperfield, Mr. T. He works from photographs but gives life to the portraits by bringing out the personalities of his subjects.

“The more he draws, the better he gets,” said Carrie McIntyre, his proud mom.

She gave copies of the “Twin Towers” set to Rep. Mike McIntyre, D-N.C., and Rep. John Lewis, D- Ga., a civil rights pioneer who visited Wilmington on Jan. 30.

Rachard lives at home and works at Food Lion.

He loves lying on the floor doing his artwork.

“I feel more intelligent,” he said. “I feel that I can do anything, no matter what it takes. It makes me feel strong.”

Asperger’s is similar to high-fuctioning autism. Autism is a brain disorder that makes communicating and interacting with others difficult. It’s less severe in people with Asperger’s or high-functioning autism.

Carrie credits an innovative public school program in Vineland, N.J., with helping put her son on a positive track.

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Carrie grew up in Burgaw and Rocky Point. She was working in Brooklyn, N.Y., for a company that eventually became part of Verizon when Rachard was born. She moved to southern New Jersey, enduring the long commute to give Rachard a better life.

Early on, teachers noticed Rachard was different. Carrie said a team of five people observed him, including a neurologist, a psychologist and a social worker. They’d sit in his classes or watch him on the playground interacting with students.

After some intensive one-on-one tutoring, he was “mainstreamed,” put back in a classroom where he did well.

He discovered he was good at art at an early age, maybe 4 or 5 years old.

Rachard said his teachers “were amazed the first time they saw me doing it.”

Carrie said his second-grade teacher called wanting to show her Rachard’s work.

At the Farmer’s Market, Carrie said, people marvel at the meticulously drawn architectural works and the portraits.

Rachard urges other people with challenges not to become discouraged.

“If you have a dream and want to pursue it, don’t ever give up,” he advised. “Trust in God that he will provide you what you need.”

To arrange a viewing or learn more about Rachard McIntyre’s work, call (910) 794-4048 or

e-mail carriemcentire@bellsouth.net.

To tell others how to find the article above in the news other than clicking the link at the top, which also enables viewing of his photo and some of his art, have them go to www.wilmingtonstarnews.com/photos After getting onto the site, they must search for “local autism artist.” My cousin Carrie here reached out to me today for help. Please help us spread the word since this year is the 10th anniversary of the Sept. 11th attacks and they are already being flooded with orders since this article broke. In addition to putting our own heads together, we are requesting tips on making it big in the art world. They will be coming up here to NJ promoting his art soon. We would deeply appreciate you letting us know of any art shows, galleries, etc. he might become part of...

Percy Sutton, my brother-in-laws' famous uncle & 1 of my idols, dies at 89

2009-12-28T15:52:00.003-05:00

Percy Sutton, trailblazing businessman, dies at 89By Jamie Guzzardo, CNN
December 27, 2009 8:34 p.m. EST
Businessman Percy Sutton served as an intelligence officer for the famed Tuskegee Airmen in World War II.STORY HIGHLIGHTS
Percy Sutton remembered as "friend and mentor" by New York Gov. David Paterson
Sutton "was suave and eloquent and debonair," the Rev. Al Sharpton said
Sutton was African-American broadcasting pioneer by buying radio stations WLIB, WBLS
(CNN) -- Civil rights attorney Percy Sutton, who represented Malcolm X and became an influential New York politician and broadcaster, has died at age 89, associates said Sunday.

As a businessman, Sutton was credited with leading the revitalization of Harlem, including the restoration of the famous Apollo Theater. In a statement issued after Sutton's death Saturday night, New York Gov. David Paterson called the former Manhattan borough president "a friend and mentor."

"Percy was fiercely loyal, compassionate and a truly kind soul," Paterson said. "He will be missed, but his legacy lives on through the next generations of African-Americans he inspired to pursue and fulfill their own dreams and ambitions."

And in a statement issued by the White House, President Obama called Sutton a "true hero to African-Americans in New York City and around the country."

His career as an entrepreneur and public servant made the rise of countless young African-Americans possible.

--President Obama
RELATED TOPICS
Al Sharpton
Michael Bloomberg
Harlem
Apollo Theater
"His life-long dedication to the fight for civil rights and his career as an entrepreneur and public servant made the rise of countless young African-Americans possible," Obama said.

A native of Texas, Sutton served as an intelligence officer for the famed Tuskegee Airmen during World War II before becoming an attorney. He represented Malcolm X until the onetime Nation of Islam leader's 1965 assassination, and continued to represent his widow, Betty Shabazz, until her death in a 1997 fire. He then defended Shabazz's 12-year-old grandson, who admitted to starting the fatal blaze.

In the 1970s, Sutton was a member of the Harlem circle dubbed the "Gang of Four," which included U.S. Rep. Charles Rangel; Paterson's father Basil, who became New York's secretary of state; and future New York Mayor David Dinkins. He served as Manhattan borough president from 1966 to 1977, and New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg ordered flags at city offices to fly at half-staff on Monday.

"It's hard to capture in just a few words how important Percy's contributions were -- and just how unique an individual he was. He helped move African-Americans and all of New York forward," Bloomberg said in his declaration.

After public office, Sutton became an African-American broadcasting pioneer by purchasing radio stations WLIB and WBLS, launching the first radio chain aimed at black listeners, civil rights leader Al Sharpton said Sunday.

"He was at the forefront of everything you can think of in black America," Sharpton told CNN. "He was the quintessential black American. He pioneered black business, black media and black politics. He opened those doors and he kept them open."

Sutton also reopened the Apollo, the Harlem landmark credited with launching the careers of performers from Ella Fitzgerald to Michael Jackson, "when it was boarded up -- when the only ones here were the rats and the roaches," Sharpton told reporters Sunday.

"He was suave and eloquent and debonair," Sharpton said. "He had a coolness about him that I think that we will never see the likes of. There was a grace about Percy Sutton that was hard to describe."

And Rangel said Sutton "never stopped fighting for our rights and building community, especially in his beloved Harlem."

"Percy Sutton wrote his own story, and in doing so, he leaves behind a remarkable legacy of achievement and social justice that will serve as an example and inspiration for generations of leaders, now and forever," the veteran congressman said in a written statement.

Our Mother; Devoted to Her Educational Career & Community Improvement

2009-11-22T13:02:00.012-05:00

Gift to my mother from Secondary (High School) Parent Council


Perhaps for her work with Renaissance Newark, maybe for her work to improve housing in Newark, or work on various committees

Re-elected as president of Arts High P.T.S.O. (Parent Teacher Student Organization) from 1976 until finally resigning from it around turn of the century, she also stayed active with the Arts High Alumni Association until retirement

1 of my best gift ever from my mom, my precious Chaos & sister Janet

Words of inspiration from an inspiration

1 of Lynn's Christmas gifts to our mother was this painting

I have never met more than two people in my entire life who knew my mother that did not rave about how sweet and wonderful she was. Triple that for people who've known her through educational arenas as a child advocate. I've never known anyone so dedicated to improving the communities we have lived in and Newark's public schools for ALL children. My mother repeatedly served as president of our residence association as we grew up, and she coordinated many youth programs during and between such times.

Yet, despite all my love, I secretly envied the kids in her "Student Leadership Group" and otherwise for gaining so much of her love and time as she did things for them through one of the many volunteer positions she'd created on and after the job-- because she then started coming home from work much later every night and too exhausted for as much quality and quantity of time with me. By this time, Lynn and Janet were in college. This continued into my adulthood though the love between us was still clearly there and strong.

Eventually,at some point, a civil service test was created just for her because she wore so many hats at work as an administrative assistant. She then became the Coordinator of Secondary Student Activities at her job after passing it. She was given a nice big office and her own assistants. That is, until a year after the state came in and took over our Board of Education, turning our district into Newark Public Schools. This was a couple of years after I'd begun teaching. My sister Janet had been diagnosed with a terminal illness the summer before I became a full time teacher in March (after substitute teaching since college) and my maternal grandfather had caught prostrate cancer shortly afterward, dying less than two months before my career took off.

After the state took over, our mom was amongst those given an unjust demotion instead, just two weeks after my sister Janet was buried, four years after her diagnosis. Lynn had also gone back to Atlanta after staying up here for months at the time helping to take care of Janet before getting a huge cut in pay herself for leaving so abruptly to take care of our sister as my mom and I basically kept so buried in work what with me trying to get tenured and Ma trying to avoid the pink slip that so many competent staff members were getting from the new district leaders. I became tenured during the year that Janet passed away and I still feel guilty for not being there as much as I wanted to be when she needed me most. I did not know until sometime this year, that those demoting her, had apologized to my mother at some point after learning all the things she had done for Newark's youth.

This middle sister had always been my 2nd greatest idol and we had such a tight bond that Janet was actually one of my best friends (besides Lynn's). I thank God for her that Janet and Lynn have visited and spoken to Mommy many times since passing, in beautiful, reassuring dreams at night. I have had a couple of similar ones.

The next summer after Janet passed, my maternal grandmother, who'd come to live with us after my grandfather passed, had a stroke and I got the pink slip (mistakenly--which was quickly corrected) that same week, just two weeks or less before returning from summer vacation. Grandma passed away the following November, in 98' due to complications from a healthcare accident made by a worker at her nursing home. I had always wanted to be so financially successful from my own businesses started on the side, that no one close in my family would have to struggle through life for any reason or end up in a nursing home. Seeing my grandmother in one for over a year was unbearably painful and that, plus again staying buried in work much of the time, also makes it hard to think about her too since she has passed as well...Unknown to many who knew her, the period after my grandmother's stroke bore heavy on my mother too, but unlike myself, she was always great at appearing fine despite the worst of circumstances. I could literally see the weight lift off her once she knew my grandmother was in a better place after passing.

We also finally had to put to sleep, the cat seen here which I'd had for literally half my life---sixteen years--about a month before my grandmother's passing. My mother had named him "Chaos" the night she found him getting a flat tire replaced at a gas station during a lightning storm since it was such a chaotic night when he was found. Many a friend of the family, including people once terrified of or enemies of cats, came to own cats of their own after seeing what a fabulous cat Chaos was while spending time at our, and later, my homes. He and the other cats we have had as a family and/or individually, all stem from my mother realizing how beneficial cats can be as a sweet addition to any family when she brought home our very first kitten when I was less than 5 years old.

O.k., enough with the rambling. Back to my mother:
Always great at multi-tasking, a gene my sisters shared, she has won Employee of the Month, Citizen of the Year from Newark's former mayor and city council, and as I said, God knows how many other awards. She was even included in a book on the history of Newark. But now, today, I just want to say on behalf of Lynn, Janet, and myself, "Thank you Mama" for the greatest role you've ever played... "Mother of the Millenium" and "My #1 Idol!"

Mommy We Thank You --for You, Your Miniatures, & Other Art!

2009-11-22T12:55:00.011-05:00

I saved the best for last.

I get my artistic talents & appreciation from both parents but especially my mother. We always received compliments on how beautifully Mommy decorated the homes we grew up in and they were always neat and filled with arts, crafts, and cultural artifacts, particularly a couple of her high school paintings framed and displayed along with paintings she made of our family when we were small. Then she started building those infamous miniatures A.K.A. dollhouses. Everything from the first mansion built for Lynn, which eventually had 23 rooms, to the country houses for me & my grandparents, to the brownstone for my sister Janet, etc. Later, she branched off into building other miniature buildings i.e. a country store and roomboxes, including those designed just for the holidays, & the latest is a winery.

Family-oriented TV shows were all we ever watched--usually while huddled up together on the couch (whether at our home in New Jersey or in North Carolina w/my grandparents and "Uncle" Donny), whether here in NJ or at our vacation home in NC. It was not unusual for us to sing, dance, and play around the house together as well as sing family songs she taught us during car rides, when not playing some car game that Lynn created. It was truly a Cosby Show lifestyle --without the Cosby couple & dough.

She would drive us to malls, bookstores, and on tours around the city (that's NY for any of you foreigners), including to museums, parks, the aquarium, international festivals, Chinatown, Little Italy, and window shopping walks at Christmastime so we could see all the lovely decorations. We were enrolled in the YMWCA where Lynn excelled in gymnastics, we took art classes at Newark's Museum, Lynn even took piano lessons and I took dance lessons for at least 7 years--all outside of school. We were also in the Girl Scouts (or Brownies)-- which she'd created a division of in our apt. building as president of the Residence Association.

Bedtime rituals included a storybook when we were really young and we never outgrew the good night kisses and hugs, plus "I love you's" after we said our prayers. Our living room was filled to the brim with boxes, wrappings, and holiday decorations on Christmas Day and my spoiled self even asked "Is this it?" one such holiday after opening all the gifts that left boxes covering our entire living room; mom always had us make a list but then bought us whatever "she" wanted us to have, some including educational toys & always including great books. We had a bunch of New Year's Eve implements that we all made noise with together and danced around with right after the annual countdown at Times Square watched on TV --along with a few sips of wine. At Easter, we'd go Easter egg hunting around the apt. we spent most of our remaining childhood in after decorating the eggs-- if we weren't at an Easter Egg Hunt in our family churchgrounds in NC.

While Ma was at work, other than extracurricular activities after school, such as Lynn's cheerleading, we had to walk straight home, check in with her every half hr. while playing outside with friends, and be in before dark. As much as I detested this as a pre-teen and adolescent (since none of our friends' parents were anywhere near as strict and "smothering"), I finally appreciated it by my sophomore year in college--when I became an activist and advocate of parenting skills myself.

Mommy would come straight home from work and start cooking for us--that is, until I (being the youngest)became a teenager and lived off of my own cooking until later at night when she finally arrived home from one of her countless educational/community meetings. Those peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, oodles of noodles, & cereals sure couldn't replace the meals I coudn't wait for her to get home to cook. Thinking back though, she did come up with a couple of rather creative recipes we'd fondly named "Mama's Garbage" (all the leftovers mixed together from pastas, meats, and tomatoe bases) and "Flojjaloppa" (all the leftovers mixed together from the bottoms of our cereal boxes)--but they, too, were delicious. As a matter of fact, even something as simple as a cup of her instant coffee and toast is still to this day second to none--and don't even get me started on her full course hot breakfasts! Back then, much of what she'd throw together was processed food, but in later years and especially since retiring, oh my God...you just wouldn't believe what a gourmet and health-conscious chef she's become! Meals have always been eaten together at the dinner table in our homes--after saying grace. It wasn't until Lynn wrote a high school paper entitled something to the effect of "I Never Knew We Were Poor" that I, too, realized that we'd grown up poor despite a middle class lifestyle & tastes yet were always rich on love.

In Loving Memory of My Grandparents

2009-11-22T11:36:00.009-05:00

We never saw our mother as religious but her parents were devout Christians, religious and influential enough to impact our walking to church together on our own a few blocks from home back in Jersey, when the spirit moved us. (Lynn even sung in the choir with Whitney Houston at this church which owned the apartment complex we'd spent most of our lives growing up in--but Whitney just had fame as a magazine model back then).

I always wanted to go camping and never forget one summer telling my mother that I wanted to do this instead of spending the whole summer downsouth. Her reply, which I came to appreciate and understand years later, was: "Go camping in your grandparent's backyard!" Our yard down there was surrounded by woods on two sides, including behind our farm, so there actually was that possibility--though I never took it. Instead, we'd spend our time down there helping to pick and shell butter beans, eating my grandmother's great preparation of those and many other forms of fresh produce that we grew, playing cards or watching TV together, and coming up with all kinds of fun, creative ways to entertain ourselves outside when we weren't playing on our swingset or in the pool that Grandpa bought for us, on our bikes, in Donny's go-car, visiting with friends and family nearby, going swimming at a nearby beach...

Theses photos depict my maternal grandparents without whom none of us would be here. They were loved dearly, not only by immediate family, but a host of nieces, nephews, and great ones that they'd helped their many siblings raise. They'd grown up together and one of my grandmother's 6 brothers also married my grandfather's sister (which is just one reason why I have many double cousins). My mother refers to this great aunt and uncle as her other parents and their 13 children as her siblings, rather than 1st cousins.

Active in the NAACP at one point, and very traditional about gender roles and other things, Grandma stayed home managing the household throughout their marriage and they also helped raise many of their numerous nieces and nephews--and great ones-- since she was only able to bear my mother and my grandfather only had one other child, my Aunt Anna, who is much older than my mother.

When they moved up to NY so my grandfather could work in a factory during the Great Migration, their home was the origin of many another family members jumpstart to life in the north (mostly NYC and Newark NJ back then). One photo shows them at their 50th wedding anniversary renewing their vows in our family church down south (built by relatives), another shows them later in the day after they did the same for their 60th wedding anniversary. They were married for 64yrs. before my grandfather moved on to the next life.

He'd worked in that factory for many years and later as a car mechanic, before he retired and they started their own farm back in our hometown, like a couple of their siblings still had. Each of the 3 grandparents that I knew, died at the age of 84; may they rest in peace. Most of their siblings also died one or two years after another, during the last couple of decades in their 80s as well. I can still remember from age 7 when my great grandmother, who my mother was named after, passed away in her 90s. A couple of my grandfather's sisters are still kicking and hysterical in their 90s. We all go to visit them whenever we get the chance while "at home" downsouth.

Just a Couple of Our Mom's Talents/Hobbies -- & Family Roots

2009-11-22T11:05:00.011-05:00

When my mother was in elementary school, instead of taking home economics like other girls, she took shop, like the boys. This taught her carpentry skills still being put to use today. I've long told her that she could have--and still can--become wealthy as an architect, interior decorator, or miniature builder, but instead, she has mainly used this skill for her favorite hobby, designing miniatures (dollhouses that you don't get to play with) for pleasure. She always kept decorating magazines and dollhouse magazines around, amongst others, and was like a kid at Christmas at dollhouse shows, miniature stores, and with others in her miniature clubs.

One photo here reveals just a tiny aspect of my mother's talent and love. It shows one room in my 8 room miniature countryhouse, built upon request when I was a child by my mother. The 1st one she'd built entirely from scratch, was a 23 room miniature mega-mansion the length of a wall in our dining room, that had been built for Lynn.

Each of us had our own rooms, literally, in this mansion though, including a few extended family members--though she chose all the decor and objects that reflected our favorite things. Eventually, she built a brownstone townhouse for my sister Janet which is about 4 feet high, an old fashioned country store for my brother Donny which came actually as another one of my requests, another country home for my grandparents, and a variety of roomboxes, including one for Halloween & one for Christmas. The one time she finally decided to take my advice and start a business with them, after so many had asked her to build one for them, she received two orders immediately, but after designing the first one, she couldn't part with it.

Another photo displayed is from a Newark Museum exhibit--that included one of my mother's miniature roomboxes. The entire museum display was about Kwanzaa, and they requested that she design one reflecting this African-American holiday. If you click to enlarge it, you might find the miniature photos of my niece Amina, my great-grandparents through my maternal grandfather, one of Janet's wedding photos, and even one of my mother's paintings-- of me as a child--in miniature.

There is a also a photo showing my mom and I at this museum exhibit's opening ceremony along with one of my mother's many close 1st cousins, Silvia--of the 52 1st cousins from the lineage of those great grandparents mentioned above alone! Those great grandparents raised their 10 children (and many of their own children followed suit with large families)on their self-sufficient farm, owned a thriving general store that catered to both Blacks and Whites, a nice home with lots of acres of land (which is still there), and all this at a time when most African-Americans downsouth were sharecroppers!

Our lineage has also had countless family reunions in their honor over the last couple of decades and my mother has coordinated, or helped coordinate, most of them. Lynn coordinated one in Atlanta (her home for 18 years), and the next to last one, which was in NC. Our mother has been the closest thing to our family griot at each one, after painstakenly spending years searching archives to trace our family geneology all the way back to my 5th great grandparents--alive during the time of George Washington--and creating the framed family tree charts that you see in the photos behind she and Silvia (which you can again click to enlarge).

My family still owns many acres of land in the area and it tears me up now that much of it is for sale and I cannot afford to buy and preserve it. I have always longed to do many great things with all that land for our whole extended family so it would be a place that remained full of my kinship groups who are proud to call it home. It was bad enough that I grew up hearing how my father and his father sold over 100 acres of land from their part of my lineage. But Lynn and Janet were the only relatives in our generation besides myself that also loved it so much. The others think it's "too countrified" and boring even though the nearest city has been growing by leaps and bounds these last couple of decades from all the people relocating to it's many beach areas.

I'm back! Just in time for some Thanks Giving!

2009-11-21T17:36:00.019-05:00

Hi again! It's been too long! A ton of stuff has happened since I last added new posts here, and I'll be getting you caught up in due time. I was just too bogged down with work, planning my Fiji trip, the follow up business from both teacher fellowships, and more work... I'll soon be adding all the goodies about my trip of a lifetime to Fiji--on my Fiji blog--now that I'm exhaling a little since our 2nd school cycle just began. But first, I've updated this whole site with new photos added to some of my old posts.

Last week, 150 people attended the celebration of such a close friend of our family, that she is more like family; a former neighbor from our apt. building. The day I returned from Fiji this summer, my mother informed me that her husband, who'd caught cancer the year Lynn died from it, had died from a sudden heart attack and been buried while I was in Fiji. Then in September, one of my best friends, M.K., was diagnosed with lymphoma and began chemotherapy. I led the annual breat-cancer fundraising drive at my school this year and we raised $331. Yesterday, I explained my annual Thanksgiving card-making assignment to my students. Later, I got a text from a dear friend of mine from college, S.K. He'd lost his father the day before and they are trying to have the funeral before Thanksgiving.

His parents have always been very kind and loving towards me and his Dad, retired and a handyman, even painted a couple of closets and fixed some things around my house shortly after I moved here. When someone dies suddenly from a heart attack like he did, besides feeling bad for them and their family, it makes me gasp in terror with the thought that I could lose another one of my closest loved ones that way. It also makes me count my blessings for those that I have ... and have had. S.K. and I got to talking about how his parents were married for 57 years and it made me think of my grandparents and how most of my other extended family members have or had long marriages.

And now... well... I just feel moved to share another source of my sisters and I's talents and inspirations--our parents. In subsequent posts, other relatives will also be acknowledged for Thanks-Giving! None of them can supercede my mother. I cannot begin to count the numerous awards and plaques she has won in her career and as a leader but on this day, just a few days before Thanksgiving, I feel moved to thank her especially, and my other closest relatives in general for being such great,special people, role models, and gifts that God created for this world, Lynn, Janet, and I.

As I listened to Steve Harvey's radio talk show just before getting out of my car for work yesterday morning, he spoke about being influenced by a woman who once told him that when she died, she wanted to have used up so much of her God given talents that she had none left; then when she went to meet her maker, she could hear "Well done my child, well done." This struck a nerve in me and made me feel anxious to do the same. I have yet to paint outside of aTi and actually shed tears driving to aTi the first day this summer because I had made the decision to just partake in the afternoon aTimpact fellowship workshop and skip the morning arts workshop so I could prepare more for school before my Fiji trip.

My mother had gone to the Newark School of Fine & Industrial Arts located above Arts High after majoring in art there, the Arts Student League in NY,and taken Sociology courses at Rutgers Newark. Then she married Lynn and I's father. Daddy was quite the Renaissance Man himself but never fulfilled his many talents though many of them he had. Mommy has done quite a lot with her talents and I hope she will do even more because she is so full of them.

Once they broke up, as a single parent, she worked as an educator, educational advocate, and community advocate for most of our lives in Newark, including being re-elected for over 20 years to the post of PTSO (Parent Teacher STudent Organization) president at Arts High, beginning the year before Lynn attended it--until she retired almost a decade ago. Lynn, Janet, and I, all followed in my mother's footsteps majoring in art at this first school of the arts in our country--Arts High. Ma was also heavily involved with the Arts High Alumni Association. As such, she was part of the committee who spent years pushing for a new wing to our alma mater which finally materialized well over a decade later.

Most of us know something of the horrible statistics and outcomes of single parenthood (especially in the inner cities) of African-American communities over the last fourty or so years. Over 70% of African-American women have never been--and probably will never be--married. More than 3/4 of African-American men are unemployed, are or have been behind bars, addicted to drugs, gay (or on the down-low), with women outside of their race, if not dead. Well, I am happy to say that we not only lived a cozy middle class Cosby-show-lifestyle in many ways amidst the poverty surrounding us in Newark, my mother never went on welfare or food stamps.
Only in very rare circumstances would she ask our father for a dime yet she never said a bad word against him as we were growing up.

I always understood that he was struggling and fighting his own demons for the rest of his life so he always had my love and we always knew we had his. He was raised by his paternal grandmother at 1st and also lived with his Dad until at age 12 or so when he watched his father get shot to death while trying to break up a domestic dispute involving a cousin who also lived with them. Right after his grandmother died, not much later, he moved in with his other grandparents (who were sharecroppers),his brother,and a number of first cousins. His mother would send them all gifts and money from her job in NY which she'd relocated to and re-married in when he was very young. But this was quite odd at a time when most people's parents stayed together and kept their children close. It was not until his adulthood that he moved to NY himself and ever lived with my paternal grandmother. These were just some of the events that wreaked havoc throughout his life.

Every so often, as we grew up, he'd come get Lynn & I & bring us to stay along with him for a weekend at our paternal grandmother's house in Brooklyn where we'd see his side of the family (other than those we'd see in NC during the summer). Or, we'd go to a unisex salon where he worked, get our hair done by him, while getting to spend time with him. Besides that harmonica, his artistic skill went into styling hair and he had a lot of loyal customers who wouldn't let anyone else touch theirs but him. I also recall feeling pride every time I'd go by a restaurant whose windows he'd painted pictures of the food on. I could always tell he wanted to get back together with our mother--but she wasn't trying to hear it and barely ever spoke to him or saw him after their marriage ended.

The Rollercoaster Called Life!!!

2009-03-08T23:43:00.045-04:00

Thanking God:

I was in a car accident Feb. 24th, on the morning of my niece Amina's 21st birthday, 5 days after her father (my brother in law) died, making her an orphan. I can't thank God enough for the fact that we're both alive and seem alright. Also, that I just renewed my car insurance a week and a half prior! Both cars were messed up but although mine stayed in the shop a few days, I'm able to drive it again now. A week and a half after getting my car from a mechanic & paying ridiculously absorbitant fees, I was right back to doing the same thing again! I bought it wholesale 8 1/2 yrs. ago for half the retail value & it has served me well for most of these years. But I still need a lot more expensive work on it and that will now have to wait along with numerous other priorities I planned to spend all this money on.

Though Chuck had passed on Feb. 19th, my niece's stepmother was thoughtful & considerate enough of Amina to postpone the funeral until last Monday so it would not be during the same month as her birthday. She invited me to join them in one of their limos for my brother-in-law's funeral in NYC which I was going to take off from work for but then I did not need to because school was cancelled due to a blizzard and I ended up not getting to attend due to the storm & challenges with getting transportation to their place before the afternoon. However, I met them at the house afterwards & we had another good talk & cry as she shared how beautiful and special it was with me. Despite the blizzard, it was a full house and funeral at the beautiful Riverside Church in Harlem and Rev. Al Sharpton gave the sermon. Amina is still our little trooper (all grown up now), as admirable, strong, and lovely as ever, even through the sad times which slip through her usual optimism and practical stances.

It was heartwrenching for me to see Chuck on his deathbed and to be with him during his last night though I'm so glad I finally brought myself to deal with him leaving before he was totally gone. But it tears me up every time I think of that call when Amina woke me up sobbing right after they'd called her at college to say Chuck only had two weeks to live. She was only four when my sister Janet was told she was dying. It reminds me so much of that first week when Janet was hospitalized and I found Amina on her knees in front of the couch in our living room, praying and crying with her tiny folded hands for God not to take her Mommy. This was the summer before I began teaching. Even though Janet fought hard for her life and lived four more years (keeping her doctors in shock) as the best mother I've ever known, she finally succumbed to it in July of 96' when Amina was only eight. Her last words were "What's gonna' happen to Amina?"

Although Lynn lived in Atlanta all of Amina's life other than when she walked away from her store management position to take care of Janet during Janet's last couple of months and until moving to N.C. in Jan. 05', she and Amina were still always very close. Lynn's last big trip taken with that advance on her life insurance was to take Amina on a Spring Break cruise to the Caribbean as a high school graduation gift. It was right after this trip that we saw the most rapid physical deterioration and countless hospitalizations. She tried hard to get me to come too like she'd gotten me to do on all these other last trips and I regret to this day, turning it down. Lynn died during the fall of Amina's first year in college and then Chuck was diagnosed with cancer a year and a half later. His passing was the worst of a series of crisis in my life over the last month and a half. But I know that the sun always follows the clouds. By the way, guess what Amina's major is? You've got it! She followed --and furthered--the path laid down by her mother, aunts, and grandmother who'd all majored in art where I teach and her major is fine arts! Isn't she lucky? That's her in Janet's arms in the photo above. Lynn is hugger on the left & I'm hugger on the right--w/the short fro' :)

Great news which I may go into more detail about at other times:

1. During the week of the accident, I was nominated by my good friend since college (Kimeth, who I consider the Queen Bee of Creativity & who gives parties to die for) & selected to be on a panel discussion at our alma mater (Rutgers New Brunswick). This was given by current members of our Black & Latino campus newspaper, "The Black Voice, Carta Boricua," which I & the other alumni panelists had strong connections to when there!!! (Partially because I gained a strong following through an editorial and the poetry I contributed to it. I was also advisor to the school news staff where I teach for 2 1/2 years thanks partially to this experience and many staff members at my school told me that our best issue was also the best one they'd seen throughout their career at Arts High.) The panel discussion was last Wed. evening, and it turned out to be a great experience & wonderful event. Other panelists included the famed Kevin Powell (newspaper, magazine, and book author; MTV personality; leader; and lecturer; plus recent Congressional candidate seen at http://www.kevinpowellforcongress.org/ who attended R.U. and was an activist with me. Alfred Edmond Jr., editor-n-chief & Sr. V.P. of "Black Enterprise" magazine (http://www.blackenterprise.com/) had graduated the summer before I came and he was another panelist. It was good seeing some old friends and even a few that I've maintained since college. I'm looking forward to my 20th college reunion in May. (Hope to lose at least 30 lbs. by then.)

2. Yesterday, I was notified that I am amongst 25% of 60 grant applicants accepted for a Geraldine Dodge Foundation (http://www.grdodge.org)/ Teacher Fellowship I applied for in early December!!! It allows teachers to get thousands of dollars to fulfill a proposed dream of a lifetime and professional development simultaneously! I'll be going to Fiji and possibly also New Zealand!!! I discovered after only applying for the "Reef Survey & Cultural Immersion Project" in Fiji on my Dodge application, that I can combine programs within the program applied for if accepted. So I am going to find out hopefully tomorrow if I can also do New Zealand's Karori Preservation Project as well as be a teacher's assistant in an art therapy class with inner city New Zealander youth. Now my good friend Michelle who I had a good time hanging out with for a while yesterday really wants to go too even though she wouldn't apply at the time I tried getting her to; so I'll find out if that's possible also since she is a Newark Teacher as well and this year they limited the applicants to our district.

3. You may recall that I said here months ago I'd be taking photography lessons so I could improve the photos of art displayed on my blog. Well guess what? I just didn't get around to noting that in the end of Jan., I finally went & enrolled for a number of them to be provided by the top museum in our state, the Newark Museum--which I coincidentally became a member of last summer during its centennial year (http://www.newarkmuseum.org/. I was taking part in a series of workshops there for the Teaching American History Grant won by my school district at the time. I also went to the annual Black Film Festival at the museum once last summer for the first time in over a decade after an Academy-award-winning filmaker-turned-Newark history teacher invited me. We happened to meet shortly after I took a screenwriting workshop in June. So be on the lookout for a film by yours truly one day back to the future. Hey, I did also take a TV production workshop series a couple of years ago! It just takes a little longer for my seeds to grow than many people thank you very much! You see the TV production studio from that workshop series in 2 photos above.

4. I also registered for a series of art workshops at the museum for the first time since my mom did it for us when we were kids! They are in oil painting so I can finally complete all of my paintings begun in aTi without the distractions of working from home). I've wanted to take these workshops again for years!

5. Today, I took the first of the photography workshops, entitled "Photographing Your Art!" The professor Rich Russo from http://www.richrusso.com/ took 3 photos, including the one above, which are drastic improvements over some of those seen elsewhere on my blog (under titles of "Shades of Grey," "2nd painting in aTi --Summer 2007," and "aTi Summer 2008 Art Exhibit."). Unfortunately, had I known he wasn't taking photos of all of my work or allowing us to apply what he taught there (after telling us to bring several samples of our work), I wouldn't have let him use the "print" above vs. the original for his first demo during the workshop. Moreover, since I forgot to put my signature on the other 2 in advance, you all will have to wait until I can apply what he taught me myself before you see what a dramatic difference true photography skill & equipment makes. I can now make them turn out just as good as they all came out in his Dover studio. (Yeah, right!)

1st steps in aTi Fellowship

2009-01-27T17:46:00.008-05:00

Note: My actual name & some other info. altered to maintain some semblance of privacy.

January 27, 2009

Dear D.J.,

Thank you for accepting the aTimpact Fellowship. This letter provides information on the next steps of your participation in the Fellowship Program.

IMPORTANT NEXT STEPS

1. Our first Fellows meeting will take place Saturday, March __, 2009 from 3-5pm at William
Paterson University, Wayne, NJ after the aTi follow up from 9am-3pm.

At this meeting, you will be presented with an official certificate of your fellowship recognition and have the opportunity to meet the other fellows. We will discuss the details of the fellowship program, outline participation requirements, discuss what a best practices guide is and answer any questions you have. Please RSVP to http://us.mc515.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=michele@artshorizons.org or 201-567-1766 x114 immediately to confirm your participation.

2. Arts Horizons new website, http://www.artshorizons.org/ has a special section devoted to the aTimpact Fellowship Program. Go to the Artist/Teacher Institute link and click on
“aTimpact”.

This site provides you with regular updates and information on the Fellowship Program.
Participate in online discussions on the “aTimpact blog” at http://atimpact.blogspot.com/
where you can share your thoughts and ideas as the group develops the best practices guide.

3. By February 1, 2009, please submit a one page profile that will be posted on the aTimpact
website. Send your profile to http://us.mc515.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=michele@artshorizons.org or mail to aTimpact Fellowship
Program, Arts Horizons, 1 Grand Avenue, Suite 7, Englewood, NJ 07631.

Your profile should include:
- Your name, school, grade level(s) and subject(s) taught.
-In your own words, describe who you are, how you came into teaching, what
drives you to teach, your interest in the arts and why you think the arts are
important to education.
-Describe how you benefited from attending the Artist/Teacher Institute (aTi)
and why you are participating as a fellow in the aTimpact Fellowship Program.

Please contact me if you have any questions at http://us.mc515.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=jenifer@artshorizons.org or 201-567-1766 x102.

Sincerely,
Jenifer Simon, Director
NJ Programs and Partnerships
Artist/Teacher Institute

Congratulatory letter for aTi Fellowship I was selected for

2009-01-27T17:42:00.004-05:00

Note: My name and contact info. altered for privacy purposes

January 20, 2009

D.J.
____ High School
Newark, New Jersey

Dear D.J.,

This letter is to confirm the acceptance of your fellowship in the Artist/Teacher Institute’s 2009 Teacher Fellows Program, an initiative of the NJ Artist/Teacher Institute funded by the Dodge Foundation. Your active participation in the first year of this prestigious fellowship program called “aTimpact” will document how your participation at aTi has impacted your teaching and students. As an aTi participant, you were selected based on your accomplishments at aTi, dedication to documentation and reflection, commitment to arts-in-education curriculum, aTi instructor nominations and educational community.

You will join a distinguished group of nine other fellows who represent a variety of subject areas, grade levels and schools throughout the state of New Jersey. Together, you will envision and create a best practices guide with expert guidance from renowned education evaluators, teaching artists, and aTi alumni. Your work will help build a model for other teachers and schools to use in their arts-in-education curriculum. It will be available to the larger community of New Jersey teachers, administrators and artists in a variety of media formats demonstrating the positive impact of aTi and highlighting how you integrate the arts into your development as a teacher for enhanced student learning.

As an aTimpact Fellow, your out-of-school time participation will include:
· A full scholarship to attend the Artist/Teacher Institute summer 2009 where you will take a hands-on arts workshop and participate in the aTimpact Fellows workshop while earning 60 NJ Professional Development Credits.
· Participation in roundtable discussions with other aTimpact Fellows, school administrators, arts specialists and education evaluators.

I look forward to working with you and transforming the role of the arts in education in NJ! An announcement of your fellowship has been sent to your school principal and district superintendent to let them know of this distinguished honor.

Sincerely,

Jenifer Simon
Director of New Jersey Programs, Partnerships and aTi

I've been nominated & selected by aTi instructors as 1 of 9 fellows!

2009-01-26T23:59:00.004-05:00

I'm so happy and honored!!! The director of aTi informed me last month that I've been selected for this year-long program in which I will meet regularly with the other award-winners so we can produce a product to be used throughout NJ teaching best practices for integrating the arts into teaching! When I get time, I'll post the whole congratulatory letter here so stay tuned! This award is something new started this year and it caught me totally by surprise to be so honored right after I mailed off my Geraldine Dodge Teacher fellowship application!!! There weren't even any applications for this one!

2nd Major School Accomplishment This Month!

2009-01-26T23:52:00.002-05:00

We all received an email earlier this month notifying us that our school received the Bronze Medal in the magazine "U.S. News & World Report" for being one of the top schools in the nation! Then this week, we received the following email (which for some reason looks messed up when pasted here):

Subject: FW: Arts High School's Performance on the Prompt Portion of the Biology EOC Exam> > > Great news!> > I happen to believe, Ms. Kilpatrick/Williams, that our> students> performed with higher success rates than the other schools> because they> are artists in training and have enough time in their> majors to enhance> the other portion of their brains that would not> necessarily be nurtured> and or/honed in a Science Academy. J> > Peace,> > Dennis> > > > > From: Pedro, Ricardo> Sent: Friday, January 23, 2009 3:08 PM> > > Congratulations and thanks to Ms. Kilpatrick, Ms. Hooper> and Dr.> Hnatczuk for all they did in preparing their students for> this test.> > > > Great job!> > > > Ricardo Pedro> > Vice Principal> > Arts High School> > > > From: Kilpatrick, Ivory> Sent: Friday, January 23, 2009 2:37 PM> To: Pedro, Ricardo> Cc: De Antonio Jr, Michael; Hnatczuk, Oksana;> Newton-Hooper, Chenita;> Brown, Norma F.> Subject: Arts High School's Performance on the Prompt> Portion of the> Biology EOC Exam> > > > I just wanted you to know that I received the results for> the prompt> portion of the Biology EOC Exam yesterday. I am elated to> report that> Arts High School had the highest overall average of any> school in the> district.> > > > * Arts High School's female students scored an> average of 11.38> out of a possible 24; the state average was 11.68.> > * Arts High School's male students scored an> average of 10.51> out of a possible 24; the state average was 11.07.> > * All students scored an average of 11.03; the> state average was> 11.37.> > > > * Science High School's female students scored> an average of> 10.01.> > * Science High School's male students scored an> average of 8.02.> > * All students scored an average of 9.29; the state> average was> 11.37.> > > > * Technology High School's female students> scored an average of> 9.45.> > * Technology High School's male students scored> an average of> 9.22.> > * All students scored an average of 9.34; the state> average was> 11.37.> > > > * University High School's female students> scored an average of> 8.15.> > * University High School's male students scored> an average of> 4.25.> > * All students scored an average of 6.67; the state> average was> 11.37.> > > > Note:> > I believe that we were the only school to offer an after> school academy> for biology. Our academy was established for the purpose of> exposing> students to the nearly 40% of content that we were unable> to get to in> class. Imagine what our scores could have been if, we had> academy to> reinforce material already covered in class!

Initial Email Correspondence to & from Another Fabulous Former student

2008-12-31T22:59:00.005-05:00

Subject: Re: you are a phenominal person!!!

To: S. Vega

Date: Saturday, September 6, 2008, 1:00 PM

Oh-h-h Sophia!!! This is my 1st time checking this site in days & what a pleasant surprise! Your letter is so very touching & moving! How could I ever forget S. Vega? I was truly thrilled to see you too at the NPS convocation at Pru. Hall on Thursday. It had to be divine intervention because you have honestly come to my mind every so often all these years,including recently. I always wonder how some of my favorite former students are and you were definitely one very high on that list. Whenever you re-enter my mind though I go back to procrastinating about trying to reach you and hoping you'll just pop up in my class one day like many other former students have.
How fabulous to know you're starting your 1st year of teaching now! With all the love you showed me as my student, I'm sure you'll shower your own students with that same precious gift. Some will go to their graves without showing appreciation and love to all the special people in their lives. Many students wait until years later to let some teachers know how they touched their lives but you were one of those who did it on a regular basis while in my class. It is students like you who truly make teaching worthwhile and give us that extra boost when the going gets rough as a teacher. Many students used to give me notes or cards which explained how I impacted them but you were one of the few who gave me gifts and often said or did such sweet things but left me wondering how I'd earned the honor of your admiration. Today, you have answered that question for me and I thank you so much for all of your beautiful words. Stay sweet, stay beautiful, and God bless. I will always love you and I hope we stay in touch!

Love, Miss Whitley

P.S. -- Which year did you graduate? -- It's funny you asked about Do Something. That's the last after school activity I coached & haven't done it since 2002 but just applied to coach it again this year! It's now known as "The League" and the Newark headquarters are still on James St. You can go to http://www.theleague.org/ also for more information.

On Thu, 9/4/08, S. Vega wrote:
Subject: you are a phenominal person!!!
To: sis joy
Date: Thursday, September 4, 2008, 1:37 PM

I was genuinely happy and excited to see you today! Sorry, I just couldn't wait to email you. With all of the students you have had---I was shocked you remembered my name and I am honored you did--thank you !! I know this may be corny and kind of cliche but I have to> > let it out... you were such a phenominal teacher to me--you gave me inspiration. you were so energetic and gave us so much information in a cool conversational kind of way. I learned a lot from your history classes--but I must be completely honest---what I remember most is how knowledgeable you were and the discussions we had and most of all if there was something that was not neccessarily in the text book--well you encouraged me to "read between the lines" and you know what?? I had NEVER even heard that expression before you! And now its a huge part of who I am and how I live my life. It is how I see the world to be honest (lol) I have always treasured all the little things you shared with your students...so although your a great teacher--the fact that you were so curious and would verbalize questions to us that you pondered and were just cool! really just a cool person--very humble and down to earth and had a conversational way of teaching and learning. It seemed like a college course. we all got into it and it was fun.
THANK YOU- really thank you. you reached me....and although you may have had tons of students before and after me---you were supposed to know TODAY that you really made a difference in MY life.
hey I still remember "do something" can you help me get involved in that? I know its my first year but I want to be like you ....and really encourage my 4th graders...call me or email me...loooooovee you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! --S.V.-

photos of Lynn's pathways through life

2008-12-31T02:10:00.002-05:00

Mental Potpourri by Lynn

2008-12-31T00:59:00.002-05:00

I just found another pair of Lynn's writings!!! I can't help being excited. Could it be she is sending them to me or me to them? I have hungered for something more she'd left behind all this time. I searched all over her pc after she and our father's funerals, hungry for the few gems that I did find then. I don't know why I never looked so thoroughly through her laptop. Am I wrong? I mean, she had to know there'd at least be the possibility that we'd go through all of her things--including on her computers--and she had plenty of time to get rid of anything she did not want others to find. That's it then! These are her last gifts to us and that's that!

Mental Potpourri

February 4, 2006

The only choices are fear or faith.

I want to rage! “Sike”, no, I don’t…but isn’t that how I should be feeling?

What does it mean that I have no rage, no anger and no sadness about a life which has been wasted? Does it mean that I have lived a good life, filled with love and happiness? Does it mean that I really do believe that the pain or sadness that we experience makes us appreciate the good times? Is life really a roller coaster ride filled with ups and downs…but all of it thrilling? Is my glass always half full and never half empty? Let’s see, what else have I been telling Gia all these years…

Success should be designed by each person for themselves. For me, it has nothing to do with climbing the corporate ladder or making a six figure income. My wealth has always been about love and how much of it I have…creativity and much of it I can use…courage/faith and much of both of those I am willing to use. Climbing the corporate ladder was fun for me, as long as I was climbing to a new position that would entertain me. Making more money allowed me to do things for others or play a little harder. Neither are things that I put on my success page. My success page is filled with the people I’ve loved, the people I’ve helped, the people that I have inspired to be the best that they can be and things which have celebrated or showed off the gifts and talents that God gave me. The most fun & pain that I’ve ever had has been on the projects that I created out of thin air, nothing but a thought or nothing but a feeling that “I think I can”.

February 4, 2006

Have our jobs become our identity? What happens when, what was once the biggest focus of our lives (our jobs) become the smallest fish in our pond…Or that job no longer exists due to illness, retirement or loss of that job. Who are we then?

How are you introduced at a dinner party? What do you say when that dreaded question comes up “So, what do you do?” If you answer truthfully are you dismissed as un-important or un-interesting? What do we put on our business cards? Do we even carry cards anymore?

2 Poems --and then some--by Lynn & I

2008-12-30T23:14:00.015-05:00

I just discovered these poems below in Lynn's computer. She wrote them 2/4/06, several months before passing. I'm at our home in NC again for Christmas vacation & my mother just reminded me that we aren't supposed to view the personal contents of anyone's computer--after reading the poems with me. Though she is right, I cannot help but view whatever I can in Lynn's computers. It makes me feel closer to her and I pray that she'll forgive any offense, be grateful that I am allowing her to live on through any part of her legacy I can dig up, and understand that my expressions of love for her through this blog are helping me & hopefully one day others to heal through ways unexplainable even to myself.

The 1st poem reminds me of how much the cancer altered her looks. First, the massive weight loss was a welcoming view for she & I and we spoke of it in the positive light of the cancer taking off the weight that we'd longed to say goodbye to anyway. She had been increasingly overweight for years. Although we'd attributed the much celebrated 40 or so lb. loss from fall 04' to spring 05' to the Adkins diet & a gym membership, it was great to see her so happy to finally fit into whatever she wanted within two months of her 1st chemo treatment. My mother who has also struggled with weight, steadily lost her own weight from being sick with worry the whole time my sister was ill. One fond memory & silver lining from this was when we went shopping one day that July & were all able to fit the same pair of pants for the first and only time. The 3 times I saw Lynn again before then & one yr. later, though the cancer kept doing it's dirty work with dramatic speed on her looks, she was often dressed to kill--and loving every moment of finally being able to look and dress sensually and otherwise however she wanted to again.

But all that materialism & skin-deep appreciation for that ever-changing new suit-for-her-spirit had stopped by the time she was bedridden that next July of 06'. She was such skin and bones by then that she would no longer get on a scale. And though I still deeply tried to believe she would not get worse, flashes of our sister Janet's last months just a decade before, kept coming to mind. Lynn lived in Atlanta then and she had told Janet early on she'd be up here the moment she needed her. So she moved up here and took care of Janet her last couple of months after a days notice at her career as "store manager and event planner" in a major supermarket (Kroger-Savon) the moment Janet let her know she could no longer take care of herself or Amina who was then eight. I was always knee deep in schoolwork even then (though it was nothing compared to now) and I've never gotten over that guilt. Janet's condition at this point still haunted my memory as I looked at Lynn that July of 06' but she still had her upbeat attitude and spirit all the time (even having a party from hospice and seeming so well there that August that they sent her home because she wasn't dying fast enough and they needed her bed for those who were).

But the destruction of Lynn's looks when I got back there shortly after Labor Day were so heartwrenching, that I cannot write of such pain other than to say that I put a pillow in front of her mirror after helping her back to bed following another challenging trip to the bathroom (because she proudly refused to use the wheelchair that hospice had sent her). I did this still hoping to give her hope after helplessly watching her look at the stranger in the mirror in a rare instance of sitting up in that hospital bed sent home to her bedroom--which she hated being relegated to.

Lynn's 2nd poem makes me think of how we often talked of our mutual longing to have children--and her countless attempts to get pregnant--including one hilarious account of dropping Viagra into the drink of her 2nd husband (who she was engaged to before her 1st husband)! It also reminds me that even though her seemingly undying spirit seemed almost gone from early that Sept. until the end (a month and a half later), there were a few moments and days even then when it would come shining through again. And she always made me feel it was because I was there by her side, still fighting for her to stay herself and stay here.

Who’s in the Mirror Today?

Who’s in the mirror today
Is it you so full of life and energy
Or is she back…that stranger, that creature, that other which has your eyes in her head and your secrets in her heart

Stolen Seasons

Babies that are never born
Children die well before dawn

Where is the teenager who loved so much
Where is the young woman with the grace filled touch

Seasons of love
Seasons of happiness
Seasons of ecstasy

I have been loved hard
I have loved hard
My life has been full, every season has been stolen
Every season has been a gift

I don't know why but I now feel a need to do add this, months later:

I went back to work a couple of months following the 3 funerals one week after the other of my sister, father, and father's first cousin Margie who was more like his sister. The two of them had lived part of their lives together as children plus she and her kids came to live with us for a while when I was a baby. Margie had just called me the day after my father died to come get a couple of hundred dollars to help with his funeral. When I called her to announce I'd be stopping by to get it two days later, I found out she'd been rushed to the hospital herself. Before I knew it, as soon as Daddy was laid to rest next to his mother in our family church's graveyard, most relatives rushed from his repasse to the hospital because we'd just gotten a call that Margie had just passed herself. She was buried on the other side of my father. It was already into Nov. by then and I couldn't go right back to work, especially with the holidays right around the corner.

After having had my family medical leave extended (which had begun in the beginning of the school year), I finally went back to work right after the New Year. On Lynn's first birthday after she died (Feb. 13th), I sent my mother, our cousin Gia, and Lynn's best friend Suky flowers before I went to work. At work that day, I wound up in an unpleasant conference over one of my kids who was partially taking out his failing grades on me. He'd always been very warm towards me before this and I found out later that this freshman had been taking care of his dying grandmother for years and was simply at wits end. Because I'd become so paranoid that my mother might lose her last daughter (me), after his threats, I had him removed from my class though I requested both consequences and help for him. We made amends a couple of weeks later and he sincerely apologized but he was still transferred from our school for failing most or all classes for the year although he'd lost his grandmother before the school year was over.

This was just one of many instances where I've never understood how some can treat people who are mourning. Though some support was given in both instances, we were both expected to carry on like our personal lives were just fine before and after these family deaths. I've added this in just to say, please take time to be more caring towards people going through something like this; you never know if it will be you, your loved one, or how you'll react. It's easy to judge when you haven't walked in someone else's shoes. I found out through a friend of his at my school that he seems to be doing alright at his second high school.

Though I've always longed for, yet never had biological children, I've always said I have a lot of children because all children are the sociological children of all adults --since we all influence them and thus help make them who they come to be--the job of parents.

Lynn always loved children and had a flock of sociological kids of her own who were crazy about her as well. Like I did at one point whenever I heard a former neighbor's baby crying, Lynn even spent more time with one of her friend's babys than the mother herself did. Another of her older close friends, Veronica even named her baby after Lynn and so did one of our cousins, Kim. I have two sets of godchildren myself and Lynn had her own godson through her other best friend Deborah. Well, you may think we're crazy but believe it or not, my mother and I now have peace of mind knowing that Lynn finally has a child of her very own. Unknown to most, my mother has always had "deja vu" experiences that were previously in her dreams. On the one year anniversary of Lynn's passing, she had a new experience that she convinced me was real:

Our cousin Judy had taken her to Charleston South Carolina for the weekend and as they left, Judy stated that they were "taking Lynn with them." They saw butterflies all along the hours drive and my mom said they could literally "feel" Lynn's presence. Then, in the midst of that night, when she got up to use the restroom, who do you think appeared in the doorway, grinning at her, before saying "Mommy; I brought someone to meet you" as she pulled a little girl who appeared to be five-- with my eyes and Lynn's bright, bubbly smile-- from behind her. She then asked, "Ariel, do you know who this is?" The girl replied with glee "Grandma!"

And then they were gone. Ariel is the name Lynn had always told my mother she would name her daughter.

Daddy

2008-12-30T22:08:00.033-05:00

After being childhood sweethearts and married for 12 years, my parents split up when I was 5...

After he started dying just a few hrs. before Lynn's wake (which he'd insisted on being at, even though he'd be on a stretcher with oxygen), I had to rush from the funeral parlor which we'd only been at for 5 min., viewing Lynn's body for the ceremonies to come, to have my Dad rushed to the hospital due to non-stop seizures his nurse called me to say he'd been having for 20 min. When I left him in the emergency room to rush home and get changed for the wake, I thought he was just snoring because they'd got him under control. I found out two days later, hours before he did die, that he was actually doing then what's called "the dead man's snore (named for a sign of death)." Daddy died of liver cancer on Oct. 22nd, the day after my sister's funeral, at age 68. following is an excerpt from my father's funeral program:

Dallas later moved to Newark, New Jersey where he married his childhood sweetheart Carolyn Simpson Whitley in 1961. Together, the two became a happy family of four with the addition of their daughters the late Lynn Chante Whitley and Deanna Joy Whitley. Dallas was a nurturing and supportive young father who had abundant love for his children. He and his ex-wife Carolyn maintained that together they combined the best of themselves- strength, compassion, creativity, intelligence- when they had their beloved daughters Lynn and Joy.

As a young enterprising entrepreneur, Dallas owned four barber shops before working in other shops across New Jersey. His clients in the shop he owned across the street from his Atlantic City location included notable entertainers such as Marvin Gaye, Sammy Davis Jr., Diana Ross and her group, the Supremes, Joe Tex, and Smokey Robinson. He and Marvin became close friends and Dallas would have traveled on the tour with this famous star had he not been expecting the birth of his youngest daughter, Joy. In the company of such great entertainers, Dallas was also a talented artist who loved to write poetry, sing and play the harmonica. He was a learned man, a great conversationalist, and avid reader who had a special interest in Black History. His photographic memory gave him a keen recall of historical, statistical and geographic facts. He loved mysteries, especially the James Bond series. Dallas will always be known for his comedic wit and ravenous appetite with a penchant for sweets.

Yes; that was my Dad. I wish I had some of his artwork or music to share here which I have such fond memories of, but I haven't seen any of the former since I was young and I haven't been able to find the tape with his harmonica music since before he and Lynn asked to hear it during their last year. I can always find some things until I most need them. If or when I find these, you'll know it via podcast addition! By the way, guess what one of the Christmas gifts I gave myself this year was? A harmonica!

One of my father's closest cousins, who he was partially raised with, was Margie. They developed such a bond that people thought they were siblings. When he passed, Margie called me to come get a couple of hundred dollars to help with his burial. When I called her a couple days later to say I was stopping by to get it and come see her, I discovered later that she hadn't answered because she'd been rushed to the hospital for complications to her own chronic health issues with diabetes. Just as my father was about to be lowered into the ground during his funeral, a cousin's cell phone rang. When she checked to see who'd called her right afterwards, the next thing I knew, most family members went rushing from my father's repasse at the church, to Margie's hospital room. The call had come from the hospital to inform my cousin that Margie had just passed. She was buried right next to my father in our church cemetary; on the other side of my father is my nana, who'd passed just 8 months before them & my sister Lynn.

One of Margie's daughters and I who lives in Maryland, developed a close bond after that. One of Margie's sons, a doctor in Atlanta, announced at her funeral,(the 3rd Saturday in a row that month--after Lynn and Daddy), that he was starting a college scholarship in her name for the children of our hometown. My mother is now the manager of that scholarship fund. Margie's funeral program is in the photo next to those of my father and grandmother above.

Lynn's high school sculpture, college drawings, & other creative juices

2008-12-30T18:55:00.017-05:00

My mother and I found these while looking through Lynn's photos shortly after she passed. Needless to say they were an instant tear jerker. She was so creative & talented in so many ways. . .

My sister graduated from a female-only version of an Ivy League school known as Wheaton College in Massachusetts with a degree in Fine Arts--after 1st majoring in interior design. She immediately fulfilled one dream by moving to beautiful Houston, TX for several years where she lived in a few gorgeously decorated apts. within charming apartment complexes while working as a Macy's buyer in the jewelry dept.

Then, after returning home temporarily for just a few months, she moved to the metro area she'd planned to enjoy since childhood; Atlanta, Georgia. While she lived in the cutest apts. there, whether with her 1st husband or alone, we would always love going house shopping whenever I came for a visit. After a few gigs as store mgr. in some large chains, and a couple of adorable houses bought with her 2nd husband (who she'd been engaged to in Houston before marrying her 1st one), she finally added a few dreams within and outside of her career.

Her 1st business creation on the side was the Atlanta Wedding Expo and she then went on to be the 1st executive producer for the annual nationally-televised gospel music awards known as the Stellar Awards which airs in January! While being store manager at a large supermarket, Kroger Savon, in the Atlanta area, she also joined (or started) a community outreach division through which she planned various fascinating events in the store for the public. This was followed by her dream career--despite much lower pay--as community relations mgr. and event planner at the Fairburn, GA Barnes n Nobles bookstore.

I used to often try to convince my family that we should start family businesses of our own, especially a bookstore... Lynn, Janet, my mother, and I all loved event planning and reading. We've always had tons of literature and my mother's library must have naturally turned us into bookworms. We would be in 7th heaven just buried in our own reading materials in the living room together or spending hours in a bookstore. My mom would sometimes have to tear me away from them when we went to a mall... Since people's mouths water while waiting for my mother to finish cooking a meal, our customers would have always been able to feed their faces and minds at the same time. My brother could have had people cracking up for days after hearing his natural comedian wit on "comedy nights" and my sister-in-law's clients could always venture next door into our bookstore instead of waiting their turn in that hair salon she always wanted. My nieces and nephews could have honed and polished even more talents and interests of their own while being "assistant managers..." Isn't it nice to dream???

Anyway, I was thrilled to experience three of the countless events Lynn had organized in Barnes n Nobles during a few visits. I joined in one lively discussion with the Imani Book Club, that she'd founded and coordinated. Another time, I did a poetry reading at a Jam which she raved about later to others, claiming I'd given the best performance. She also excitedly talked my ear off one day about a regular children's storyteller that was performing that night--which I just so happened to miss. Lynn did so well that they promoted her to regional trainer for managers in that position of the store within a 5 state area!

As if that weren't enough, another creation was born once Lynn discovered that her state had the highest illiteraracy rate in the nation. While still doing an an outstanding job wearing all those hats at Barnes n Nobles, my superwoman sister taught herself web design, created her own non-profit organization through self-taught methods, designed the website for it, and made herself executive producer! It was entitled the Atlanta Literary Festival and this magnificent week long festival, which donated the funds to literacy groups in GA, grew larger for three consecutive years until her cancer diagnosis was the end of it in 2005. Her friends gave her the nicknames Pocahontas, Pippi Longstockings (from one of our favorite childhood characters), and "the Brain" (after the cartoon Pinky & the Brain) because she always came up with so many exciting things to do which she got them to go along with & get involved in, including this.

I was finally actually reading Lynn's superbly produced promotional magazine for the festival--which she also created--just a few days ago. I always longed to be there to witness the whole event after she told me of all her great plans, but she wouldn't change it from the 3rd week of my return to work after summer vacation--and I knew my supervisors wouldn't take too kindly to that.

As I get the chance, I will keep adding more of my sister's art here. As you can see, I've already added her huge wall hanging drawings from her beautiful 2nd house in Atlanta and part of its decor (though you can only see two of the three sketches here) and a page from her Literary Festival newsmagazine. Theses drawings now hang in our NC home & the 1 seen below is my favorite art piece that she made. After that lo-o-ong trip down memory lane, my biggest point is this:

Lynn was just 43 (my current age) when she passed on. I've often heard that graveyards are full of riches... All that wealth from untapped talent, unfulfilled dreams, and other potential... Let's all pray that the rest of us with this gift of life and creative power don't add to that list.

painting #2 aTi summer 08': Shades of Grey

2008-12-30T14:03:00.013-05:00

This painting was made on my 2nd day at aTi summer 08' & is a first in 2 ways. Now that I've taken a workshop on photographing art, you see a better photo of this 1st "attempt" at abstract painting than the original one posted here.

This is also the 1st one I made to fill a request. My hairstylist, asked me to paint something for the white room in a new property he'd just purchased & remodeled beautifully for various parties. He also told me I could host an art show in it; giving me my 2nd confirmation that I could actually use this talent for income! (I've had at least 5 other requests since, plus the 1st, from a manager in a nursing home near aTi.)

Since I had no idea of how to make an all white painting to match the all-white-things in this fabulous all-white-room, he allowed me to use these colors. Actually, I chose the title I did & the colors of black, white, & grey as sort of a tribute to he and his White wife since they are an interracial couple with children.

It could also be seen as my acknowledgment of wise words from one of my former students during my 1st year of teaching. I'd had a double-major in college of Africana Studies & Sociology & though my focus in courses within the latter major had been on all types of oppressed groups within the U.S., & I teach in a very diverse school, I felt so enlightened & enthralled by learning of my own heritage, and upset that I had learned so little of it prior to college, that my teaching of history was originally a bit imbalanced by it,especially while I was a substitute teacher & during this first year. So 1 day, this sweet, outspoken Portuguese freshman student named S. Pastor raised her hand to say something to the effect of, "Miss ______, I'm tired of learning about what Whites did to Blacks (in this world history course). The world is not black & white; there are shades of grey!"

S.P. mentioned in her farewell card to me (when she was about to graduate as valedictorian), that she hoped I'd learned as much from her as she had from me. She couldn't have put it any better. Miss Pastor had become a Mrs. when she last reached out to me by paying me a lovely visit in my classroom several years later. She had recently married herself; and though I had assumed it was to an African-American, I learned otherwise many years later.

The circle is a very significant symbol in traditional Afrikan culture (which I learned has no "c" in its languages that is not followed by an "h"; thus, my spelling above of "Africa"). There is no beginning and no end to the 360 degrees in them and one Afrikan proverbs says "Let the circle be unbroken." This is an expression of desired unity; a hope for harmony with others. One of my deepest hopes is that racism be destroyed; not only through relatively superficial means such as bonds of friendship and love that can occur between any human beings, but through a deep re-education and enlightenment about contributions & challenges of all racial and ethnic groups, as well as a thorough knowledge of the good, bad, & ugly that exists in all living things and cultural groups, thus making us one. The circles in this painting symbolize that enlightenment which I dream of for the world and the rectangular strips signify the pathways which can lead us there.

Omar requested a twin of this painting when I finally showed it to him a few months ago. Once I finish them, he will then hang them side by side in his all white room-- which is near his all black room--and everyone who views it will see shades of grey...

One beloved artistic student

2008-12-03T00:20:00.011-05:00

The following former student from the c/o 2000, who I wrote the letter of recommendation for grad school for below, was the third person who offered to buy some of my art work! She visited me in my class one day last year and saw my first 3 paintings. After receiving the following letter this Fall, she also asked me to paint something surprising and cheerful for the new apt. she planned to move into soon after. That's also her in the middle of the trio of photos from classes I had many years ago.

Remember, the footer (at the end) is my attempt at going incognito here since this website is public. Read on!

October 1, 2008
Rutgers, The State University of NJ
Office of Graduate & Professional Admissions
(other contents of addresses deleted for this blog publication)

To whom it may concern:

There are some students that a teacher never forgets. K. Berryman, one such student indeed, receives my recommendation for your program without the slightest hesitation. She is an absolutely outstanding human being who is just as wonderful in personality as in the role of a top student within my world history class during 1996-97’. This student is a tremendously gifted writer and has excellent higher level thinking skills.

Her creativity and enthusiasm for learning was demonstrated numerous ways both in and out of our class. We actually met at William Paterson University where she was an outstanding student during the summer prior to her freshman year at the highly acclaimed W.E.B. DuBois Leadership Institute where I was an adjunct professor and residence coordinator for a month. Later at ____ High, while I was advisor for our school newspaper staff, she contributed articles and even started her own “Dear Leena” column, giving wise advice to her peers. In addition to this, she was a talented poet and song writer. K. took her education very seriously, always added liveliness to our class discussions, and went above and beyond expectations with her work.

This lovely young lady still maintains a vibrant, bubbly demeanor and that awesome originality. We run into each other in the neighborhood and otherwise communicate now and then due to her current role with the education-centered Abbott Leadership Institute and our fond memories. I never cease to be impressed with her spirit and dedication to her work. Last year, I had the distinct honor and pleasure of being invited to her 25th birthday party and was quite impressed with her “Berryman Awards” theme for it which was incorporated throughout the affair. After putting on a star performance with her acting, dancing, and lip syncing skills in the spotlight, she proceeded to award various guests who gave impromptu performances of their own. (I was even nominated for something!)

Your graduate program will be forever enhanced by Ms. Berryman’s presence. Some of you will find like I, that although many fuzzy names and faces have come and gone over the years, she is one who will forever leave a cherished imprint in the memory of those she comes in contact with.

Sincerely,

Ms. D J
_____ High School teacher

The written word: There, Over the Rainbow

2008-11-20T00:46:00.017-05:00

I'm going home tomorrow--to my rural hometown in N.C. that is!!! Whoever came up with the line "There's no place like home" described my feelings exactly. Both sides of my family are from there & my great grandparents and beyond all grew up there and it was the site of my entire childhood summers, just like my mothers.

When she was a child, she grew up in NY and NJ but helped my grandfather and his brothers build our house down there one summer. From then on, it was their vacation home until my grandfather retired and my grandparents and Uncle Donny (who's my cousin by blood but adopted by my grandparents, making him my uncle, although he's a year younger than me and more like my brother through age and love) then moved down there. My immediate family and I had been living with my grandparents for a year until that time, when I was about three, after I'd spent my first year in Atlantic City and the next two in our NC home. Once Grandpa and Grandma moved,we too then moved out of the two family home once shared with them and another family up here and into a different two family nearby.

Most people in our community down south are my extended relatives from different lineages, a tradition carried over from traditional African cultures. I've continued to go there one to three times p/year throughout adulthood. As soon as my mother retired, she had moved into our home there within a month. She started remodeling and creating her own gardens right away and you can see here some photos of the many upgrades she has made (including one showing my niece Amina (Janet's daughter)and her best friend having an art auction of their work in our yard when they were around 12. Lynn, my mother, and I were vying for the treasured pieces. :) There's another one showing Lynn, Amina, and our other nieces and nephews (Donny's kids) playing and lying together on pillows on our living room rug, after telling spooky stories to each other.

On Saturday, I'll be in my oldest friend's 2nd wedding down there. I'll post the pictures below after her wedding. We've been close since I was age 5 and she, 6. Her parents are still amongst our closest neighbors there. Her sister, who Lynn was very close to, married one of my paternal cousins. Her brother was Lynn's childhood sweetheart from the time we were little kids until he passed during a pool accident when he and Lynn were just 21. He and Lynn always planned to marry and he'd recently moved to Atlanta because that is where she knew she wanted to live after college. I know he and Lynn are finally together again, living happily ever after on another plane...

I wish I could just go home to stay and once I retire myself, I'm so there! A few days after our father's funeral on 10/22/06, (He died the day after my sister Lynn's funeral-- after almost dying a few hours before her wake), I began writing 2 pieces about Lynn & our home downsouth which we've all always cherished. Here is one of them:

RAINBOW'S END & LYNN

There’s a reason we call our home here in N.C. “Rainbow’s End…”

It’s not only the abundant bounty of nature that instills everyone who steps foot on our land with an indescribable peace or the endless beauty, creativity, warmth, & coziness that envelopes u as soon as u walk up the steps & pass through the threshold. It’s this pot of gold called love & joy that are the ties which bind not only the blood of this household but the extended family & friends who’ve become family & also feel at home once they arrive here. Lynn Chante Whitley has always been one of the greatest treasures in this pot.
Although we feel that a part of ourselves is missing, we know she now lives on in spirit & amongst the butterflies still fluttering about in our gardens when they should have been long gone by this time of year. And when we replace her & my other sister Janet’s favorite flowers, the sunflowers, that Lynn planted in her 1st & only garden here last spring (& our beloved grandparents planted here many moons before), we’ll not only remember the precious memories of her undying spirit, love of life, & what seemed to be her last yet unforgettable event, that precious farewell ceremony with all its magical balloon, dove, bonfire, dancing, twinkling eyes following us everywhere, & butterfly moments, we’ll also remember to treasure all who made this transitional time so much easier. We are eternally grateful for the treasure that is you & we hope you, too, will treasure all of your loved ones while you still have them & the beauties of nature like Lynn did.

Join me if you will, & think of her each time you go to the beach or see yellow butterflies & if the spirit moves you, try planting/giving sunflowers to those you treasure in her memory so that they, too, may bask in the sunshine that these beauties, like she, will forever emit through wonderful memories. Just as the butterfly has undergone life transitions from egg to caterpillar to pupa …before reaching its fullest potential, we know Lynn has gone through the cycles of life from an embryo to a fetus, a babe to a child, and an adult to… a spirit in that special place where she’s been given her wings.

She’s flying amongst & above all whose lives she touched with the nectar of her sweetness & who continue to keep her alive in the sasa by speaking her name. Wherever we are, there is she; waiting until the day we’ll be able to fly beside her & our other loved ones in our heavenly home…at the other end of the rainbow.

Lynn's invitation for a sisterhood-girlfriend's retreat

2008-11-20T00:35:00.015-05:00

My sister Lynn was full of creativity & often planning something exciting for friends or family to do with her. I've included photos here of a couple of such occasions. The first one is from her Atlanta Literary Festival which she got all of her friends and many others to help her with. Then there are 2 from our childhood in our 4th home at the time, which reminds me of some of the wacky games and creative things she'd come up with for us to entertain ourselves as children--such as turning our bedroom into a campground using blankets to create makeshift tents. One shows Lynn and our youngest niece at Disneyworld, the 2nd trip she planned and carried through after her diagnosis. She treated Donny, his wife, their two sons and two daughters, and I on this trip that she'd actually wanted us all to go on for years. Another photo shows our oldest niece holding our youngest niece on a trip Lynn took all of our nieces and nephews and I on, to Myrtle Beach in South Carolina.

I found the letter below on her computer a few days after our father's funeral, a week and a half after she passed. Then I was moved to write the attached piece which I'm really hoping you will click on to enlarge and read first (and please excuse the typos on it; I discovered after the fact that it was printed on an earlier, rather than final, draft--for all you other teachers out there)!

Dear Family,

Join us for a wonderful week (or long weekend) on the beautiful North Carolina coast at a beautiful ocean front cottage aptly named “Surviving Stress.” The date has finally been set – Saturday, October 15 through the following Friday, October 21st. Surviving Stress is located in Caswell Beach on Oak Island approximately half an hour from Wilmington. The house itself is breathtakingly beautiful with three levels, an elevator, and a gourmet kitchen that will have us all grabbing the pots; four oceanfront decks facing the Atlantic fully equipped with hammocks, swings and rocking chairs; six beautiful bedrooms and 3.5 baths; there’s a fireplace in the main floor living room; a den on the 2nd floor balcony. The house comes complete with multiple cable televisions, VCR, DVD with surround sound, CD player etc. Bring your favorite music and movies! There’s also a fully stocked game cabinet, so get ready for bid whist, spades, bingo or whatever! A short walk right off the back deck connects to a private boardwalk across the dune to the beach and ocean. The house is spacious enough for everyone to find a quiet spot to read or quietly enjoy the ocean views. Painters bring your sketch pad or portable easel, writers that special pen and lots of paper……you will be inspired by the sisterhood and the beautiful setting. Note to the gamblers: The casino boat leaves from Little River twice a day. It’s about thirty minutes from where we will be staying. Note to the shoppers: The outlet centers at Myrtle Beach are half-an-hour away so bring those charge cards if that’s what you like to do! I know we will see you there…just imagine watching the sun rise on the ocean! You can’t resist. We love you and hope you can share this very special time with us. COST: The cost is the same for the weekend or the full week….$300. This covers the rental, linen service and maid service at the end of our stay. We will share the cost of food.

Love,
Lynn

I also wrote about this unbelievable experience afterwards in the piece that I've submitted here. Although we all have yet to go back to this breathtaking place, you can find it yourself online at www.survivingstress.com Maybe you'll get that much needed R&R there that we have yet to take advantage of!

7/10/07 poem: I am a Wavebird

2008-08-24T14:22:00.002-04:00

Artist/Teacher Institute
Playwrighting Workshop

Assignment II: After closing your eyes and scribbling for 7 seconds, circle an object in your scribble and write a script about it within a couple of minutes.

I AM a WAVEBIRD

I am a wavebird
Yes, that’s what I said thank you!
I am a bird that floats on the waves
…AND soars through the skies.
I have no limitations!
I am free and you cannot catch me.

Come from below, I’ll rise to the clouds.
Come from above, I can dive beneath the surface of the sea.
I repeat; YOU CANNOT CATCH ME! I AM FREE!

I bask in the sun.
I paddle with my partner for fun.
I don’t need a lighthouse.
I stay in the sunshine & let my own light shine.

THE END

Note: O.k. so I’ve written poetry in my past; never before tried to be a playwright – but I loved this activity & the resultant poem! :)