RYS Blog by Victoria Allen

Love Gets Messy Sometimes!

2013-01-29T15:25:00.000-08:00

Lets' face it: Love gets messy sometimes!

Have you ever heard yourself say, 'This can't be love' or 'I think I've fallen out of love'? Maybe you've had the experience of losing respect for your partner or friend for a time. You've 'had it' and you want to take a break! Or, you might even be an expert at dreaming an exit strategy. If you've been in a committed relationship, you may know what I'm talking about.

Love does get messy at times. Knowing how to clean up the mess and return to an even stronger connection is an art. Learning this art requires your attention and action to be committed to a life of growing the Love that is always inside of you. When you are devoted to becoming a Courageous Lover you consistently ask yourself:

"What Would Love Do Now?"

10 Ways to become a Courageous Lover

1. Vulnerability Rocks Your Relationship

Get real and be yourself. If you want to be loved for who you truly are, why pretend? Risk being vulnerable by taking off any masks of protection that cover over your fears, feelings and thoughts. Good relationships demand the strength that true vulnerability offers. Commit to Loving!

2. Bury the 'Right/Wrong' Game

Give it up and choose happiness over being right. When two people with two unique dreaming minds create a relationship there is bound to be disagreement. Agree to disagree, respect each others differences and let go of your need to 'be right'. Choose happy over being 'right' and everyone wins!

3. Embrace the Messiness

Relationships get crazy messy sometimes. Let yourself and your partner be in these challenging spaces without making a big or dramatic story about it. Give up your exit strategies. Often the hardest and most confusing of times opens you into new agreements with each other. Relationships are about growth!

4. Make No Assumptions
Asking questions rather than making assumptions is a straight path to intimacy. Making assumptions about what your partner is feeling or why they do what they do keeps the mind spinning its stories. To deepen the heart of your relationship, ask questions with the intention of truly listening. Listening is the first act of Love!

5. Retreat and Return
Love opens the heart of relationship while fear shuts it down. Everyone steps away from their beloveds at times. Hurt, frustration and disagreements send us away to contemplate and reorganize our self. The real power arises in knowing when to take space and when to return. Choose to return to Love!

6. Speak Up
Do you become silent when you desperately want to connect? It takes courage to access the power of your voice and say what is really going on inside of you. Use "I" statements and speak from your own experience. Squelching your voice is a set up for disconnection and resentment. Communication is the foundation for great sex!

7. Live With Respect
Holding 'high standards' or creating a View of how your partner needs to be for you to be happy doesn't work. This lack of acceptance and disrespect damages the best of relationships. Supporting your partner to live their life in their way is the biggest gift you can offer them. Learn the Power of Respect!

8. Get Mad when You're Mad
It is refreshing when anger is expressed cleanly. Anger is a secondary emotion that arises from hurt, fear or frustration. Dumping anger or taking passive-aggressive actions shuts down the openness of love. Embrace and express anger as it arises in the moment and use it as a signpost to discover the deeper feeling underneath. Then let go and move on!

9. Take Responsibility

Be accountable for your own emotions, thoughts and actions. No one causes you to feel or do anything. You do what you do because of you and not because of others. As you realize this truth, you give up victim stance. Responsibility Frees You!

10. Be The True Lover
You are the source of Love in your life. No one can give you this experience. Self-acceptance, self-respect and self-trust create this golden elixir called Love. Fill up first and offer your abundant heart into life. Expressing your Love is a direct route to Happiness!

Meet the Mighty Saboteur

2012-12-28T14:24:00.001-08:00

A mighty Saboteur can sweep you under in a heartbeat with its handy dandy broom of self-doubt, reason and addiction — robbing your spirit and intent.   

You feel great. You’re poised to shift into new endeavors, to change the direction of your life. Looking ahead you can see the results of this shift: an increased sense of well-being. Your intentions are clear, your commitment to action is in place—and then something thwarts the process. That “something” is your Saboteur who shows up as a subconscious menacing force in your life.

  Its first strike is to challenge every aspect of your intention to expand your life. You take a risk, do things differently, try a new creation, or uncover a part of you that has been squelched far too long. Soon the doubting voices arrive on the scene to undermine your new commitment to thrive.

As creator and operator of your safety program, your Saboteur coaxes you to abort change and cling to what is familiar and predictable. This force attempts to maintain the status quo of your life. Its' motto is: “We’re currently safe, so let’s keep everything as it is.”

  The concept of sabotage comes from the Netherlands in the fifteenth century when workers threw their wooden shoes into the wooden gears of the textile looms to break the cogs, because they feared the automated machines would render the human workers obsolete. When the Saboteur feels the threat of change, it throws in the shoes and does its best to muck up the works.

  But change is inevitable. The universe is built on the principle of constant flux. We are either the agent of change as our intentions fuel our new actions, or we experience the results of change as events prod us to stretch, grow and move into new arenas.  

Choosing a new direction that summons fresh possibilities opens us to greater fields of light. It shifts us into new and unknown spaces where all we have known will be up for examination. Expansion, by its nature, gives space for inspiration, innovation and excitement. And, along with these juicy states comes a dose of trepidation or down right fear.  

When life unexpectedly turns onto a new path that we weren’t prepared for, we find our self unearthed. Our safety zone is challenged. What we have relied on is gone and we are shaken to our very bones. Free-falling into foreign territory, our ground quakes with confusion and trepidation.

  No matter whether change starts from within or takes us by storm from outside, one thing is sure: your Saboteur shows up shoes in hand. Its force slows or stops your momentum. It doesn’t trust the unknown spaces of transition—too unstable for its taste.  

Do you remember a time when you were about to undertake something new? Perhaps you were about to initiate a new creation, take a new job, or commit to a relationship. Your heart and mind felt engaged. You made the choice to follow what felt right and true for you.  

Did you notice uneasiness and voices of reason chime in to cause you to doubt yourself? Those were your Saboteurs tactics attempting to convince you to avoid the discomfort of change. This force is not concerned about your happiness or fulfillment; it is interested in keeping you the same so it stays in control.

  Reason is the main tool your Saboteur uses to halt growth and keep you stagnant. It comes up with reasonable strategies to remind you that change is dangerous. Even if your world is feeling constricted or is lacking in vitality your Saboteur sticks to the motto: “Stay safe and keep everything as it is right now”.  

New actions frequently give us a feeling of going against some force. That force is your Saboteur. You can see people making new decisions and taking unprecedented actions and then they pause to say, “This must not be right or it wouldn’t be this hard.” Not true! Changing our program is hard work as it takes a huge amount of energy to shift into a new direction.  

Even if a situation is abusive or dysfunctional and you know you need to leave it, your Saboteur will convince you to put up with it. Here the different tones of its voices: “It could be worse.” “Maybe things will get better if I stay here, ” “You will likely re-create the same problems in the next relationship.” “You can’t possibly do this.” “It won’t work!” “Can I survive?” This banter appears intelligent as it tries to convince you to stay in unsafe or impossible situations.  

Your Saboteur works to control change. Like a big black hole consuming huge amounts of energy, its fight against the inevitable expends your vital life force. It ensnares you in inertia, indecision and indifference. When it is in exceptional form, you may find yourself unable to get out of bed.  

This sabotaging mechanism is not born from negativity, although his program certainly engenders negative thinking. It is all about protecting what is safe and familiar.  

While sabotage is often demonstrated through reason, it has another powerful mode to keep you from expanding. The Saboteur is a master at procrastination. It will keep you from starting or completing any task. This is its way of coping with the anxiety that accompanies change. If your actions are counterproductive or delay your new intention, you are caught in your Saboteurs' trap.

Your Saboteur has another finely tuned mechanism to interrupt momentum in your life. Rather than experience the uneasy feelings that arise with expansion and freedom, your Saboteur will point you to your familiar addictive patterns in an attempt to modulate your energy—keep you in your comfort zone.  

Just as you have taken up a new way of being, your Saboteur reminds you of the comfort that your past or present addictive behaviors have given you. He sends you back to the cigarettes, on to create drama, out to shop till you drop, or plops you down to surf the web. The frenetic activity of addiction attempts to keep you from feeling the huge influx of light that opens within you as you ignore your Saboteur in an attempt to raise the state of your life. Your Saboteur perceives this as foreign, thus dangerous. It wants you to panic and retreat from everything unfamiliar.  

When you stay focused on your intention to change or expand your life, expect your Saboteur to show up to test you. It hammers you with reason, undermines you with doubt, keeps you in procrastination mode or activates addictive tendencies. You can get angry at its drag on your life and waste your energy in frustration. Or, you can accept it for what he is: an outdated program fraught with errors and lies that is holding you back from your potential.

Turning Point For A New Dream

2012-12-23T10:24:00.000-08:00

Today is the darkest day in the year, 12/21/12. It is also a day predicted by the Mayan prophecy that our world is ending. Taking this outer message into my dreaming mind, I'm making a conscious choice to see this time as a turning point in my life.

Will you join me in consciously passing through a turning point in your life? 2013 Is Dawning!

When we meet a turning point in a sleeping dream, we look at the symbols or messages after that point. They reflect to us deeper awareness or new direction. These symbols show us transformation is on the horizon. As a dreamer, we participate in consciously bringing this change into our life.

Everyday, each of us is met with many turning points. Will we choose to be happy over being right? Will we let go of judgment to choose respect and forgiveness? Will our conditioned patterns of protection stay in place or will we enjoy the strength of our vulnerability? Will we take the high road and grow into our whole Self, or will we shrink from this task to stay safe?

When we choose to participate in the turning points of our soul's evolution, we exercise courage to let go of what no longer serves us, nurtures us or grows us. We embrace new possibilities, learn to breathe into unknown spaces and bring compassion to the emotional content that arises. We participate in the transformational process, the evolution of our life.

If we choose to resist the natural evolution of our soul's path we suffer needlessly. We ignore the knocks at the door of our heart. We disrespect ourselves and we put up with unhappiness, anxiety, overwhelm or perhaps downright pain. In our very resistance, the unconscious erupts in the form of chaos, accidents, crises, relationship difficulties and illness. And, Who wants that?

Now we are at a new turning point ~ 2013. What is it going to be? What will you activate on the other side of your turning point? How will you use your energy more impeccably and how will you Raise Your State? What will you focus on? What truly matters to your heart?

I'd love to hear from you. What is your heart's desire for 2013. What will you be creating after your turning point?

Please email or give me a call. I'd love to hold witness to your new dream.

May your New Year be filled with health and abundant happiness!
Victoria

10 Ways to Thrive Through the Holidays

2012-12-06T09:43:00.001-08:00

The holiday season is here. Do you dream that your holiday will be Magical? Filled with connection, celebration and joy? Or, are you with the other 45% dreading the upcoming weeks? Yes, one large study shows that 45% of us want to avoid the holidays altogether.

What is happening? I can only imagine that the increased stress added to already stress-filled lives that is the cause for so many people dreaming a holiday retreat. What I do know about this time of year is that many people get bogged down in "busyness," stress and old patterns.

Here are 10 ways to turn that around and create the holiday magic when you take really good care of yourself.

Give yourself a break. Perfection - even perfect happiness - just isn't possible. Let your best be good enough.
Make a budget for both your time and your money and stick to it. It really is the thought that counts.
Make conscious decisions. Get clear about what you really want to do over the holidays before compromising with others. If you don't have a clear plan and clear intentions, you might find yourself getting swept along by others' desires. Even if you compromise later, get clear first.
Shorten your to-do list. What do the holidays mean to you? For many, it's about family and friends and spirituality. If an item doesn't add to your holiday spirit, scratch it off.
Say NO when you want to. It is very liberating. Try it and see. It sounds simple, but too often the sense of obligation trumps desire. When faced with options, choose the one that would make you happier.
Limit obligatory activities. If you can't avoid certain events, limit the time you're there.
Take good care of yourself. The old standards help keep stress at bay: eat healthfully, exercise, drink lots of water, and breathe deeply. Schedule time for relaxation and fun.
Start early - like this week! To avoid a last-minute frenzy that can bust your budget, start shopping or making gifts now.
Ask for help. Reject any notion of martyrdom. The burden of preparations should not fall upon one person. The more specific you are in your request, the more successful you will be.
Establish new traditions. If you have experienced a major life-changing event, such as a death, break-up or divorce, consider doing something you've never done before over the holidays. Change it up! Get support.

If a glorious holiday season feels completely out of reach, you may experience the holiday blues. Many people do. Don't beat yourself up for feeling that way. Reach out for the support you need.

I hope these 10 tips help de-stress your holiday!

Reframe Your Ideas of 'Selfish'

2012-11-25T20:17:00.000-08:00

Your conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness. Listen to it carefully." ~ Richard Bach

Many people label "selfish" a bad thing. Have you ever abandoned your own needs in order to not be "selfish", and then ended up feeling you went against yourself? Why not take on "selfish" as a healthy stance that attends to taking care of Self.

When you selfishly guard your life force, you stay filled up on the inside and you ultimately have more to offer others.

Are you trained to not be "selfish"? Do you experience pangs of guilt when you need to say "no" to your partner or friend and "yes" to your personal needs?

If you've learned to be super responsible, a caretaker or have co-dependent tendencies, taking care of Self is often a stretch. It redirects the outside focus of attention and points you inside to your most precious gift, yourself! When you embrace the light side of "selfish", you will experience the luxury of valuing yourself. You will find ease in saying Yes to you.

Tools to shift you to the light side of "selfish":

Make a list of all the things you would be doing if you stopped labeling them selfish.Turn each one around and ask yourself: "Does this "selfish" action really mean I'm taking care of me? Is it loving, is it kind, is it necessary for me to honor me?
Endeavor to take one new action that you have considered to be selfish. Work with the guilty nudges that arise as you break this pattern. Rinse and repeat.
Daily affirmation: "I am responsible for the choices I make.

Breaking any long held pattern feels awkward, uncomfortable and is sometimes anxiety provoking. This is just the old pattern attempting to survive. Have the courage to do it anyway. Know you are heading in the direction of loyalty to yourself.

Do you take the High Road?

2012-10-28T07:20:00.003-07:00

"We don't see the world as it is, we see it as we are." ~ Anais Nin

At times we feel hurt, betrayed or disappointed by someones words or action. And, on occasion our own hurt wants to hurt them back or at least know they might be suffering too. While we are still licking our wounds, we might even imagine that person is happily going about their life. Life certainly doesn't seem fair sometimes. Have you ever experienced this scenario? I have!

Choosing to Raise Our State is a process of refining our character. Learning to take the high road when we feel hurt or betrayed pays off.

Consider this truth: "What we do to others, we do to ourselves."

High Road Strategies:

Feel the feelings without making a big story out of them. In time, when you are present to your feelings, they subside. Stopping the story is the big task.
Refrain from reaction and wait to respond. Reaction hurts you and clear response strengthens your integrity.
Look at your participation in the relationship. Is there anywhere you can take responsibility? Are you a victim or a volunteer?
Strive to find your peace through forgiveness.
Let go and move on!

Puff Up Your Patience Power

2012-10-27T19:56:00.000-07:00

"Be patient toward all that is unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to be able to live everything. Live the questions." ~ Rainer Maria Wilke

It feels awful to react strongly to a situation and then regret you didn't respond from a centered place. Have you made a hasty decision only to discover that if you had waited a tad bit longer you would have made a wiser choice? And, most likely saved yourself a lot of time and energy in the process.

Patience is a power that allows us to take a breath and get comfortable in the unknown spaces of life. It supports us to bear the times when old structures are dismantling and new ones are not yet in place. As an act of refrain, patience keeps us from forcing situations or attempting to control others.

Patience is the result of experiencing life as a process rather than a goal. It is a key ingredient that allows us to hold the tension long enough to gather all the information needed to make a decision. As we embrace the bigger co-creative flow of life, we strengthen internal trust and Patience becomes power!

This week use your awareness to note a time in your life when being patient paid off. Remember how it felt to hold the tension and then to discover it was all worth it.

Do you have a situation in your life now where you could exercise a little more patience? Practice breathing deeper each time the tendency to force things arises. Patience is like riding a gentle wind. It honors the flow of life and Raises Your State.

Remedies for Harsh Energies

2012-10-27T19:05:00.002-07:00

A wise mother knows: It is her state of consciousness that matters. Her gentleness and clarity command respect. Her love creates security. ~ Vimala McClure The Tao of Motherhood

People storm, systems are dysfunctional and stress is expressed everywhere. Even our own mind participates by offering up defensiveness, judgment or resistance at times. In all their forms, harsh energies first jar our energy field. Then, they impact our physical body creating dis-ease.

One antidote to dense and violent energies is to cultivate Gentleness as a way of being. Do you know what it is like to feel super stressed and then walk into a gentle, peaceful environment? The experience is recognizable. As we cultivate a gentle state within, we become the healing balm that has the power to soothe our soul. We settle ourselves inside and this allows our body to unwind its tension. Through Gentleness we uplift our heart and download the stress filled mind.

The next time you feel the weight of dense, harsh, stressful energies impacting you, consider one of these Gentle Remedies to counter stress and feel better.

Gentle Remedies:

Lie down and put your feet up the wall. With your hips about 6 inches from the wall and feet straight up, you are actively relaxing your sacrum, the triangular (sacred) bone at the base of your spine. This bone contracts when your mind is active with stressful thoughts and relaxes at will when you put your body into this position. Put soothing music on and breathe. The is a great exercise to do the very first thing when you arrive home from work to download the tension of your day. Try it, this daily practice becomes a good addiction.
Water is a grounding element that de-charges our energy field. Draw a warm bath with a scented oil that you love to smell. The dense mental-emotional field from the world you interact with each day will dissipate. In just 15 minutes you will notice feeling more grounded and present to you. Water mirrors your life force and brings you back to your source where you touch into your gentle nature. De-charging is necessary for anyone who works in the healing profession.
Earthing is a powerful form of connecting with your own vibrant health. Just as the sun gives you Vitamin D, the Earth under foot gives you a natural, gentle nurturing dose of Vitamin G - think Ground! Go barefoot outside on grass, dirt or even concrete every day. It is especially great to neutralize the technology vibes you pick up from computers or re-charge the energy that is drained with florescent lighting. Learn more about this growing field call Earthing as a way to gentle you everyday.
Cultivate a daily practice through a morning intention to be Gentle with your thoughts, words and actions. Check out your words: Are they Kind, True and Necessary? Especially the words you say to yourself. At the end of the day, check in with yourself, 'In what ways was I gentle with myself today.'

As with all inner states we choose to strengthen, focus and discipline are a necessity. What we focus on grows and whatever we are a disciple to becomes our truth. Why not be a disciple to your natural Gentle State? Discover how these simple remedies make a difference in your life.

Conscious Intention ~ A Daily Practice

2011-11-12T08:00:00.001-08:00

Does your morning alarm jar you awake and jolt you into action? Or, do you have the luxury of marinating in your dreams or doing a little bed yoga to ease into your day?

No matter how you wake up, consider starting your day with the potent practice of Conscious Intention.

This practice brings focus to our day, disarming
the auto-pilot that lulls us into familiar and routine habit.
It sets up a conscious GPS that navigates direction and keeps us on the track of where we intend to go.

Have you ever awakened with an intuitive message or knowing?
During our first waking moments, our rich and wise inner guidance still lingers in our energy field. Our mind is not yet plugged in to the activity of our waking world. This sacred time is perfect to harness the power of these wise inner messages and bridge them into the focus for our day. The practice of Conscious Intention begins here.

Daily Ritual:

1. Heart Center: Focus your attention on your heart space and breathe. Take a few moments to allow the energy that arises from focused breath to expand within you. Our clearest and most sincere intentions arise in our heart. Connect with your gratitude as your heart experiences the abundance in your life. Even if your mind comes up with lack or limitation, keep focusing on the gifts your heart perceives. Opening our day with heart focus is the way we give rise to Love each day.
2. Get Clear: What matters most to you today? Make it simple and specific.
3. Commit to Action: Conscious intention needs concrete action behind it. Thinking about it is not enough. Writing down our intention, putting it into this concrete form with 3 action steps makes it real and more doable.
4. Gentle yourself: Stretch, drink a glass of water and be ready to catch the moments of your day when you feeling aligned with your intention.

Whether you wake up facing challenging tasks, mundane activities or great fun, taking time to gather your energies to create conscious intention will raise your state.

At the end of the day, you'll recognize that this morning practice makes a difference. You will re-enforce the experience that what you focus on grows. Over time, you will notice that giving rise to love each morning grows your heart and brings you closer to what truly matters to you.

Do you have 'Comparinoia'?

2011-08-17T11:55:00.000-07:00

"You yourself, more than anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha

Do you ever compare yourself to others? Is 'Comparinoia' tweaking your self-esteem?

Making comparisons is a sure fire way to create our own needless suffering. Whether we use comparison to inflate or deflate our sense of self, neither feels good. We label others "better than" and our very judgment causes our head to drop, we feel shame or guilt. Aren't we supposed to be 'good enough' as we are?

If we look at others through our "less than" lens, we may puff up for a bit, yet some part of us registers that our arrogant nature has gotten the best of us. This doesn't feel good either.

Being in a group, sitting with a friend or watching TV, brings this habit to the forefront. 'Comparinoia' is a mind pattern that creates separation from others, while also separating us from our own heart. When this insidious habit takes a hold of us, we don't settle in to appreciate our uniqueness, our own special ray of light. We evaluate ourselves instead of valuing ourselves.

Imagine thinking a fish is better than a giraffe because it swims in a water habitat. Or, a peacock is more valuable than a sparrow because his feathers are bigger and brighter. While we do have our preferences, it works to see the unique beauty in all things without using the mind of comparison.

If you want to Raise Your State, consider appreciating the different fragrance of everyone and everything . To include your own special fragrance. Each time you notice yourself inflating or deflating someone or yourself, stop and note you can do this differently. You can notice the unique and special ways people act, dress, live and express themselves. The best remedy for this annoying habit is to truly honor what is special and unique about you.

Monday Mantra Practice

2011-08-17T11:47:00.000-07:00

"Mahatma Gandhi used his mantra to remove negativity for over 60 years."

A mantra is a sacred syllable used as an object of attention that creates focus and quiets our mind. Mantra can be a prayer or blessing. The sounds of sacred mantras infuse our nervous system and Raise the State of our very own DNA.

Mantras have a potent ability to protect us from our own fear and negativity. They are useful to diffuse obsessive worry. Ultimately, they take us beyond our mind into the heart of who we are. They connect us with our essential self.

This week we offer an adjunct to our weekly intentions ~ A Monday Mantra. By creating your own personal mantra, specifically in line with what really matters to you, you will build a powerful focus to infuse and vitalize your week.

To create your Monday Mantra, check in with your current state. Listen deeply inside. What word or phrase speaks specifically to what you want to strengthen this week? Try it out and notice if the sound of this personal mantra resonates in your heart. Does it uplift your spirit? Does it spur you on? If so, you most likely got it.

'Thank you-Thank you-Thank you' is a mantra used by one of my good friends. 'Peace-Peace-Peace' is another mantra that resonates in the heart and softens the mind. 'Perseverance- Perseverance-Perseverance' might be just what you need to take you to a finish line. 'Om Namah Shivaya' is a steady mantra I use that means, "I bow to the One consciousness that dwells within everyone." It is one of the most potent mantras, as its' syllables spark the main energy centers within us.

Whatever mantra you choose, make it perfect for you. Ground it in by writing, repeating and illuminating it in anyway you choose. Make a sign or put it on your desktop. Speak it silently upon waking in the morning, say it throughout the day and let it be the last thought of your day.

When you choose to join this practice, our cute teal quetzal bird will remind you to infuse your week with focused intention. Initiate a Monday Mantra to Raise Your State.

Sink or Swim

2011-08-17T10:11:00.000-07:00

"Water in the boat is the ruin of the boat, but water under the boat is its support." ~ Rumi

All of our relationships create an energy exchange. We can manage our own energy more effectively when we discern Who gives energy and Who zaps it. While some people create buoyancy, some take us right to the bottom of our tank.

Positive energy in others is rejuvenating. When we choose to relate with supportive and heart-centered people who have cultivated their happiness, we feel ourselves lifting into states of well-being. Do you remember a time when you and a great friend laughed, played and supported each other? People with buoyancy in their being offer enthusiasm and nurture the best of us.

When we tangle with people who blow their negative wind toward us on a consistent basis, it takes our own effort, our own energy, to survive the experience. Energy zappers, whether chronically negative victims of life, or even ones who kindly entice us into non-stop talking, gossip or complaining, can leave us completely drained. Zappers aren't bad people, yet they haven't generated respect for themselves or others.

It is up to us to manage our energy. In fact, if we choose to sustain states of well-being, it is Top priority.

This week use your awareness to inventory the people in your life who offer a buoyant state, one that uplifts you. And, while you are at it, check out who you see or talk to on a regular basis that zaps you. Track how you feel when you are with each of these energy fields.

Raise Your State 101 ~ "Everything is alive and connected." Our energy is a precious commodity and it is up to us to take responsibility for what we do, what we live and what we communicate. This way of Raising our State encourages us to be the best buoyant being we can be.

Compassion

2011-08-17T10:07:00.000-07:00

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion." Dalai Lama

Do you struggle with a hard spot, a demon, an aggravating characteristic, or a gnarly unhealed wound that rears its head occasionally? You might recognize this as a quality that you don't like, judge harshly, defend to the end or often repress. We frequently hide these edgy places in the closet, along with the coat we wear only once a year.

Anger, greed, jealousy, insecurity, envy, pretense, anxiety, pride and denial top the list of these so-called virtueless qualities. They are the dark angels that lurk in our being. They masterfully separate us from our self love and can do damage to our relationships.

A great way to befriend these odd fellows is to offer them your deepest Compassion. Compassion for our self is our ability to 'be with' all aspects of our character without judgment, resistance or adding self-pity. Compassion for others offers our empathy and respect without an overlay of sympathy or pitying them. With compassion, our heart holds an open presence that brings the healing substance of love to our self, a person or situation.

As we deepen into compassion, we embrace the whole of us, exactly as we are. This includes the qualities that we love about our self, as well as the darkened shadows we experience. When we become friendly with our dark angels, we can bring them under control rather than battle them. Compassion turns a win-lose situation into a win-win and we expand into Love.

Compassion is the salve that initiates the thawing, softening and releasing of these contractions of our mind.

This week use your awareness to witness any dark angel that may visit you on occasion, or even the ones that show up everyday. Experiment with becoming the witness -embracing without judgment - and offer your compassionate heart. The kindness and gentleness that radiates from Compassion Raises Your State.

Choose Happiness

2011-08-17T09:45:00.000-07:00

"Because of willfulness people sit in jail. From willfulness the trapped birds wings are tied. From willfulness fish sizzle in the pan." ~ Rumi

The 'need to be right' causes us to stubbornly and willfully cling to positions which don't lead us to peace and ease. It is a habit that creates stress on our system and havoc in our relationships.

When we engage the full force of our will behind a 'need to be right', we are insisting that our own beliefs are the true and only reality. We imply that someone is right and someone is wrong. When you take this stance, you create separation from your own heart and from others. Look carefully at where the 'need to be right' takes you.

This week use your awareness to monitor if you have any stubborn tendencies. Make a mental note that you always have a choice to either be 'right' or 'happy'. At first it may not seem that these two are mutually exclusive, yet the fact is, you can't have both.

When we commit to a path of heart we learn to make the smart choice over and over again. Our consistent choice to 'get off it' and choose happiness Raises Our State.

Meditation Visions: Are yours Real or Imaginary?

2011-07-15T14:19:00.000-07:00

By Doug Allen

Have you ever become fascinated by visions that arise during meditation? These visions, often felt as breakthroughs, show us a glimpse of something beyond our sensory system that normally dominates our awareness.

People like to experience visions because they lend credence to the idea that we are more than just our physical body- that there are extraordinary worlds beyond the body. Those who don’t have visions when meditating often feel left out or somehow less advanced.

Through many years of meditation practice, it has become abundantly clear to me that visions of the inner planes are not indicative of spiritual growth. These visions are a superficial veneer of underlying movements of consciousness. In and of themselves, they are meaningless. It is the underlying movement of consciousness that has meaning.

Having a sense that we are being stretched energetically, or having a new feeling inside of our self, is what matters. Increasing awareness that our character is strengthening and our love is expanding indicates spiritual growth.

Visions are of two varieties- real and imaginary. It is up to each person to honestly test the veracity of a “vision” to determine if it is real or imaginary. A real vision will create two responses. First, the physical body will register a sensation of some sort, your feeling state will shift in a way that you know you couldn’t do through imagination. You may have a feeling of bliss, lightness, goose bumps, pressure, a feeling of delightful expansion or other sensations.

Second, the mind will immediately try to intercede to understand what is happening, and this often ends the vision experience. The ability to hold the mind at bay as you are being impacted by an energetic is a skill that is developed. In a true vision, the mind will remain still and unattached. In fact, the easiest way to tell if your vision is real or not is whether the activity of the mind makes it go away. You can’t regain the experience once the mind attaches to it.

Especially in the beginning stages, the typical pattern is that you will drop into meditation as the mind becomes still. As the waves of thought become still you begin to have a deeper experience of your own being. At this point a vision may arise. Then the mind will jump in with its desire to understand and question the experience, and in a sense, take control of the experience. The mind loves to think it is the ruling force of our being, while in fact it is just the caboose on the train of our being. Thus the mind will take over, add its story to what is occurring.

Knowing that visions can arise only when the mind is still, and that as your energetic state shifts the mind will want to re-insert itself, you can start to gain discernment of whether you are seeing or imagining. If you honestly assess what the mind is doing, it becomes easy to discern the true visions from imagination.

True visions tend to be abstract and, at best, only partially understood by the mind. After all, you are being moved to a new place of awareness, how could you understand it at first experience? How could you make sense of it especially when the inner planes have a reality that is different in nature than the physical plane? It is like visiting a new land with a language you don’t know. It takes time to learn the language, customs, and terrain.

It takes practice to develop the inner eye and get a handle on how the inner planes appear. If you are fairly new to meditation and you have visions in clear detail, you are imagining. If you switch from scene to scene, you are imagining. If you have no physical response, you are imagining. If your vision looks just like something in the external world, you are imagining. Be honest with yourself with this assessment.

True vision will not boost the ego; it is part of the process of destroying the ego. The energetic that is behind a vision will take you beyond your normal comfort zone, not increase it. A true vision is part of an energetic that shakes the system; it won’t build up pride and ego. The energetic behind a true vision should diminish the ego as it forces you to re-orient your idea of who and what you are.

Ultimately, what counts is to experience yourself being moved into a new state sVisions are absolutely unnecessary for this process to occur, in fact, vision is rarely associated with profound growth. It is a meager by-product of the process. On the spiritual path what must be focused on and worked with are the feelings of stepping into new and uncomfortable territory. If visions occur along the way, fine. If you don’t have visions you need not be concerned. Know that as soon as the mind grabs onto the idea that visions are important and a primary focus, you will inflate or deflate yourself.

If you have a desire to have visions, you will eventually be trapped.

In my 25 years of spiritual work, and hundreds, if not thousands of visions, I can say that a vision has never moved me forward on the path. Think of visions as a signpost on the road. They are not the road, the map, the vehicle, the fuel, nor the landscape being crossed. It is only my bold willingness to step into the uncomfortable unknown that has moved me into deeper territory within and a stronger connection with spirit. It is our ability to be shaken by forces greater than our mind, embrace the mystery and not turn away from what life presents us that is the measure.

"The Teo Effect"~ Pyramid Journey

2011-06-29T21:20:00.000-07:00

By Doug Allen

A significant cornerstone of Raise Your State teachings is our trips to the pyramid complex of Teotihuacán, Mexico. The architectural design of this ancient mystery school is a playground of profound states of consciousness. When we step into a journey to Teotihuacán, we discover a road map into our mystical nature. It moves us into the deepest places within, revealing our true nature.

During the five-day retreat, participants melt into the energy that permeates Teo. Through the levels of our being, we are touched, uplifted and transported by the power of the light here.

To best utilize and maximize the energy that lives within this power vortex, it helps to see how the human form is constructed. We have four primary levels to our being: physical, subtle, casual and transcendent. The physical level is the physical body. The subtle level is electrical and magnetic in nature. It is here that we store our past impressions, compulsions, habits and addictions. The majority of our identity resides here. The causal level is formless and is comprised of thought. The transcendent is the eternal aspect of our being. This is the aspect of our being that never changes, and because it never changes is our eternal state.

The subtle body is where the vast majority of our spiritual work happens. It is a very complex compilation of electrical circuitry. Whenever we feel or talk about energy in our body, we are dealing with the subtle body.

Within the complexity of the subtle body are seven primary areas where energy is especially concentrated. These are called chakras. It isn’t easy to describe chakras, as each one is its own universe. However, we can make some general statements that are very helpful. First, each chakra has structures that are typically called petals because of their similarity in shape to flower petals. Second, the position of these petals, upward or downward facing, determines how much light we perceive and contain.

In addition to the chakras are three primary energy channels that flow in the center of the body from the sacrum to the top of the head. The middle of the three actually goes up through the top of the head. These channels carry life force into the chakras, which then distribute that energy to the rest of the subtle and physical bodies.

What is typical is for the petals to point downward putting us in a bound condition. As such, the energy flows down from the top of the head and gravitates into the lower three chakras where it gets used in our pursuit to manage our life and environment. As such, we find it normal to concentrate our energy around work, money, relationships, pleasure, security, survival, sex and making life work.

When we choose to transform our life and raise our state, the task at hand is to shift the position of the petals from downward facing to upward facing. When the chakras are facing upward, two primary results arise. The first is that we begin to touch into the higher states of our consciousness. Second, we begin to store energy in our system, which improves our state on all levels of being. With increased energy, personal power increases.

So how do we shift the petals? Power spots, such as Teo, are permeated with the vibrations of beings that lived in a state wherein the petals are upturned. When we visit those places our subtle body resonates to those energies. In effect, our petals are temporarily moved into the upward facing position. Thus, we get a taste of what living in a higher state of consciousness is like.

The deliciousness of this exquisite elixir is so enticing. We experience this bliss, yet to become established in it is our spiritual work. As with every new state, it takes time and repeated attention to acclimate our subtle body and sustain it in higher states of consciousness.

Until we are established we find our self moving back into what we might consider our “normal” mode. And with this move, the petals go back to the position they were in before being upturned.

As frustrating as it is to not be able to hold that higher state, at least it is now a known state. It is no longer a matter of conjecture it is a real experience that we can tap into. If the desire is strong enough to get established in that place, to make it your new normal mode, then you will undertake spiritual practices.

Spiritual practices are primarily about purification and withstanding the purification process. Purification is the means by which we release limiting beliefs and false identity in order to re-collect our true essence. These limiting beliefs are stored on the petals. As we release them, the petals rise to their upward position.

As the limited beliefs and emotions get shaken loose, they don’t just disappear, they rise into our awareness. The standard reaction is to get a little depressed to once again be experiencing feelings we don’t like, but what is really happening is that we are being offered a choice.

Purification asks us to look at feelings that arise, recognize them, feel them, and yet not attach to them as who we are anymore. When you notice them and don’t accept that they are you, if you say, “I choose to feel differently”, they will detach from your identity. They will unravel from this contracted expression and release back into pure energy. This is how we hunt energy and is the essence of the stalking process.

As these patterns come up, they feel like a strong force that tries to push you down your well-worn paths, such as anger, envy, pride, jealousy or righteousness. In the midst of this onslaught you have to stand up to that force and hold your ground and not get moved down that path of identity that no longer serves you. This is not easy. You are choosing to turn away from an uncomfortable yet known path, and move into the unknown of new states that create more ease and freedom.

Teotihuacán in itself gives you a taste of what the unknown is like. You know where it is you are going and why it might be worth the momentary discomforts of purification to get there.

The necessity of developing the skill to not attach to all the feelings that arise in you cannot be underestimated. It is our key to freedom. As free will beings, we have this choice, it is our part of the work.

To raise our state, we must transform our concept of who we are. The speed with which anyone moves on the spiritual path is determined primarily by how fast we can make this shift.

We visit Teo regularly to put this whole process into action. The boost that Teo gives will show you more of the real, eternal you as well as shake up the forces that keep you bound, giving you the opportunity to see them and say, “No more, it is time to do it differently.”

What is required to be successful is your honesty and determination. You have to want to know the truth of yourself and be determined to face whatever needs to be faced to live in the state of truth. The development of this skill is one of the primary aspects of the Raise Your State teachings.

We invite you to join our journey to experience the magic of Teotihuacan March 16-22, 2012.

Three Qualities of Love

2011-06-29T16:40:00.000-07:00

By Doug Allen

The ancient spiritual teachings say that everything in creation is composed of three qualities. These qualities are so intrinsic to the human experience that the overall layout of the pyramids of Teotihuacan is based upon them. Theses qualities are known as Inertia, Action and Purity. They are represented by Fire, Sun and Moon.

Even Love is expressed through these qualities and I've outlined some of the expressions of love that fall into each quality.

To start with, Fire is the type of love that says, “If you love me, you will _____”. This is the kind of love that is self-centered and makes demands. It is in a state of inertia as the person expressing this quality in love wants others to do for them, without thought of reciprocity. It is a taking quality of love.

The Solar quality of love says, “I will love you, if you love me”. This is a type of love that demands reciprocity. If you tell this person that you don’t love them anymore, they will stop loving you. This is a give and take quality of love. It is possessive in nature.

The Lunar quality of love says, “I will love you without conditions”. This type of love looks like it is a giving form of love, and in a way it is, but for the person expressing it the feeling is more one of sharing. This form of love arises complete within itself and is accepting in nature. It needs no outside support or validation.

The Fire quality comes from a place of powerlessness. This type of person has very little energy with which to give, and so must take. This form of love can be parasitic, if only because the person isn’t capable of a higher expression. This is not to say that it is wholly negative, as we all started life at this level. It is a stage in the progression of love’s expression.

The Solar love is the one we are most familiar with since it is the one that is romanticized. It is hot and passionate. It is all about power exchange and seduction.

The Lunar love is the one we tend to aspire to. It is powerful in that it is self-effulgent-not needing any external validation. This is a supremely free state of love. If it is shunned, it still remains equally radiant.

The Fire love doesn’t care who feeds it, as long as it gets fed. The Solar love is highly selective. The Lunar love is impersonal. This doesn’t mean that Lunar love is somehow aloof, it means that the same love shines on all beings equally. It is a divine form of love.

The Fire love is stagnant; it immovably sucks the energy of others and no matter how much is given, nothing changes. The Solar love is short-lived; it is a flash of intensity that can’t be maintained. All lovers know the feeling when the high of the Solar love recedes. The Lunar love is a cool stream of pure water that never stops flowing.

We can’t think of any of these expressions as good or bad, yet instead we can discern when in our life it is most appropriate to express each form. We can have the ability to move into any one of these at any time.

When we are sick, we can allow ourselves to be in the Fire mode, and let someone take care of us. When taking care of someone sick, the Lunar mode works best. When we want to merge with a lover, we moved in the Solar energy.

Of course, if applied at the wrong time, each form can cause trouble. We don’t want to be in the impersonal Lunar mode when starting a relationship, nor in the Solar mode with everyone we come across. We can’t be in the Fire mode when our presence is needed by another.

A relationship with a life partner needs all three. It needs the steadfastness of the Fire, the occasional passion of the Solar and the long-lived flow of the Lunar.

Become a master of love by recognizing these qualities and how to best use them in your life.

The "Who's Who" of Raising Your State

2011-05-20T16:06:00.000-07:00

Meet Gracee
Gracee is our Inner Self that opens us to Love.

Everyone experiences Gracee. She uplifts our lives from everyday stress and tedium to a state of peace and happiness. While some feel her steady grace uplifting their heart on a consistent basis, others rarely notice. When we tune in to her light, we meet life’s challenges with ease. When we ignore her intelligence, we suffer needlessly.

Gracee is depicted here as a fictional character, yet you will know her as a subtle presence within you. Her essence could be referred to as the inner Self, the God within, the inner light or simply Love. No matter what we call her, she arises from the spirit of life, ever present within us. Gracee is recognized in the moments we are present with life.

Gracee’s path is sculpted of the deepest intelligence—Truth. When in resonance with Truth, we experience a vast energetic river running through us. In our willingness to raft this river, our bodies relax and flexibility is readily available. The mind stills into states of contentment. The usual stress that arises from arguing with ‘what is’ and ‘what works’ dissipates. Gracee is the experience we have when we feel all is right with the world.

To follow Gracee is to come into right relationship with Love. This relationship flourishes only when we drop the protective patterns of the mind. No matter how hard we try to get love from people, accomplishments and things outside of ourselves, it can’t be sustained. Love comes from within and is the strongest power in creation. Love is an energy that heals and uplifts all life.

Gracee’s domain is one of interconnection. Under her influence, we thrive instead of merely doing what it takes to survive. We consider the good of the whole, and we hold another’s heart as our own heart. Connected to Gracee, we experience a deep trust in the higher order that orchestrates the universe.

If you want to Raise Your State, Gracee is the master to follow. Her guidance opens you to the Brilliant Powers that live within you, the ones known as gratitude, generosity, patience, kindness and compassion. When you express these virtues into life you experience love coming out of you and this is what truly creates happiness. These inner powers deepen integrity, awaken authenticity and offer peace.

When we catch a glimpse of her, we want her to be the driving force in our lives, yet how do we make it so? How do we find our connection to Gracee and establish a steady relationship with her guidance? What is it that continually distracts us from her path and pulls us into the fear that denies her existence?

To restore and strengthen our connection with Gracee, we need to look at her counterpart, who works at cross-purposes to hers. We prefer to keep this character hidden in a dark corner of our mind and never acknowledge his presence at all. However, to give Gracee free rein in our life, we have to cultivate awareness of the ways her opponent undermines Love. With awareness we can choose to root out his stealthy interference.

Meet Buddee
Buddee is the energetic master that moves our mind and emotions into distress.

Everyone has a Buddee. Some people have their Buddee’s company every minute of every day, while others barely hear Buddee whisper. Those who follow his advice use their creativity to reinvent ways to suffer and those who ignore his banter find happiness an everyday occurrence.

Buddee is depicted here as Gracee’s fictional counterpart. While her operating principle is Love, his is fueled by fear. As you become aware of Buddee’s mode of operation, you will know him as a force that moves your mind and emotions into distress.

Gracee is constant presence, always moving through us, whether unseen beneath the surface or shining bright. Buddee, instead of arriving whole all at once, begins anew in each of us, assembled piece by piece. He is often referred to as habitual response patterns, neurosis, the ego-based personality construct or the self.

Initially he comes into being as an ally to protect our vulnerable innocent child and to secure our place in this bewildering new life. Thus, Buddee initially feels like a comforting companion, a true buddy. Early on, he steps in to protect us from everything that didn’t match the simple purity of our wise and vulnerable core, which is most of the world, most of the time. The world can be scary to a child who doesn’t know the ground rules yet. Loud noises, abrupt movements, and conflicting behavior seem threatening. Even a small disapproving look from an adult can cut like a knife and penetrate to the core of a child’s innocence.

When we, as children, find ourselves trapped in a maze of situations that frighten us, Buddee steps in to help us cope and navigate. He defines the roles we play and the rules we follow that promise safety in our particular environment.

We have the intrinsic need to survive and belong. Buddee devises strategies to get our needs met. He negotiates agreements we make with our self and agreements we make with others. These negotiations attempt to ensure acceptance, love or, at the very least, that our physical needs are met.

He helps us make sense of our world by teaching us ways to think, act and feel, so we can fit in. He tells us that if we allow him to direct our life, we will be safe and connected in our world.

There is just one little problem. Buddee’s program was set up to help our child survive by fitting into the patterns of those around us. It relates to our current situation in a convoluted way. Often it doesn’t work at all. As an adult, these survival-based patterns contradict our authenticity and integrity.

Looking back at the elders in our life, we recognize the ones whose patterns were based on thriving and growth. From them we sensed the intimacy of heart connection and emotional availability. They inspired us with their authentic nature. The power of living in honesty and integrity brought light into the lives of those around them.

With role models like these we learn how to take care of our basic needs and then move into autonomous ways of thriving. We thrive through belonging to a greater world, connecting through intimacy and developing confidence and self-esteem. Our true nature is one of evolution that takes us through many stages and states. Change is inevitable.

Buddee’s force goes against evolution. He is rooted in the stagnation of ‘staying the same’ to survive.

When the actions of the people who raise us are not aligned with compassion, presence and happiness, or perhaps they’re absorbed in their own world, we become confused and lost. Our confused child has lots of internal questions: “Who can I trust? Why does Mom say she is happy when I see her so sad? I’m just having fun; why do I need to be quiet? How can I stop Dad from being angry? Why doesn’t Mom tell him to stop yelling? What’s wrong with me?”

In an innocent way, we take this confusion into our world. The demands of the external world contradict our internal guidance system, the innate integrity we are born with.

Our frustration mounts as we attempt to answer these questions with our immature intellect. Because the adults have authority and experience, we assume their behavior must be right. We conclude that the fault must lie within us.

This internal message then becomes one of the strongest subconscious and destructive forces in our life. An interconnected system of faulty beliefs arise from the one belief: something is wrong with me.

From this assumption, our Buddee sneaks in to save the day by answering the “how to” survival questions about our life:

“What do I need to do or say to be Okay?”
“How do I act to fit in and be accepted?”
“What do I need to feel safe?”
“Who do I need to become to be loved?”

To meet these questions Buddee devises behavior for us to repeat in any situation that threatens us. He attempts to protect the deepest place of innocence that lives in the soft vulnerability of our heart. He warns against stepping into the fluid nature of life. In Buddee’s estimation, taking risks ends badly. Yet growth always entails a certain amount of risk.

Buddee’s protection begins so early that you may not remember a time without his guidance. He may feel like a faithful ally. His ways of helping you survive as a child may have worked at the time. Yet, if you are consistently unhappy, suspect that your Buddee’s outdated program is still running—and possibly ruining your life.

Buddee Crafts the Saboteur

2011-05-16T13:57:00.000-07:00

Buddee crafts the Saboteur who can sweep you under in a heartbeat with his handy dandy broom of self-doubt and reason — robbing your spirit and intent.

You feel great. You’re poised to shift into new endeavors, to change the direction of your life. Looking ahead you can see the results of this shift: an increased sense of well-being. Your intentions are clear, your commitment to action is in place—and then something thwarts the process. That “something” is your Buddee, who shows up as a subconscious sabotaging force.

Buddee’s first strike as Saboteur is to challenge every aspect of your intention to expand your life. You take a risk, do things differently, try a new creation, or uncover a part of you that has been squelched far too long. Soon Buddee’s voices arrive on the scene with doubt to undermine your new commitment.

As creator and operator of your safety program, he coaxes you to abort change and cling to what is familiar and predictable. He attempts to maintain the status quo of your life. Buddee’s motto is: “We’re currently safe, so let’s keep everything as it is.”

The concept of sabotage comes from the Netherlands in the fifteenth century when workers threw their wooden shoes into the wooden gears of the textile looms to break the cogs, because they feared the automated machines would render the human workers obsolete. When Buddee feels the threat of change, he throws in his shoes and does his best to muck up the works.

But change is inevitable. The universe is built on the principle of constant flux. We are either the agent of change as our intentions fuel our new actions, or we experience the results of change as events prod us to stretch, grow and move into new arenas.

Choosing a new direction that summons fresh possibilities opens us to greater fields of light. It shifts us into new and unknown spaces where all we have known will be up for examination. Expansion, by its nature, gives space for inspiration, innovation and excitement. And, along with these juicy states comes a dose of trepidation or down right fear.

When life unexpectedly turns onto a new path that we weren’t prepared for, we find our self unearthed. Our safety zone is challenged. What we have relied on is gone and we are shaken to our very bones. Free-falling into foreign territory, our ground quakes with confusion and trepidation.

No matter whether change starts from within or takes us by storm from outside, one thing is sure: your Buddee show up shoes in hand. His sabotaging force slows or stops your momentum. He doesn’t trust the unknown spaces of transition—too unstable for his taste.

Do you remember a time when you were about to undertake something new? Perhaps you were about to initiate a new creation, take a new job, or commit to a relationship. Your heart and mind felt engaged. You made the choice to follow what felt right and true for you.

Did you notice uneasiness and voices of reason chime in to cause you to doubt yourself? Those were Buddee’s tactics to convince you to avoid the discomfort of change. He is not concerned about your happiness or fulfillment; he is interested in keeping you the same so he can stay in control.

Reason is the main tool Buddee uses to halt growth and keep you stagnant. He comes up with reasonable strategies to remind you that change is dangerous. Even if your world is feeling constricted or is lacking in vitality Buddee sticks to the motto: “Stay safe and keep everything as it is right now”.

New actions frequently give us a feeling of going against some force. That force is Buddee. You can see people making new decisions and taking unprecedented actions and then they pause to say, “This must not be right or it wouldn’t be this hard.” Not true! Changing our program is hard work as it takes a huge amount of energy to shift into a new direction.

Even if a situation is abusive or dysfunctional and you know you need to leave it, Buddee will convince you to put up with it. His voices come in a variety of tones: “It could be worse.” “Maybe things will get better if I stay here, ” “You will likely re-create the same problems in the next relationship.” “You can’t possibly do this.” “It won’t work!” “Can I survive?” Buddee’s banter appears intelligent as he tries to convince you to stay in unsafe or impossible situations.

Buddee works to control change. Like a big black hole consuming huge amounts of energy, his fight against the inevitable expends your vital life force. He ensnares you in inertia, indecision and indifference. When he is in exceptional form, you may find yourself unable to get out of bed.

Buddee’s sabotaging mechanism is not born from negativity, although his program certainly engenders negative thinking. It is all about protecting what is safe and familiar.

While his sabotage is often demonstrated through reason, he has another powerful mode to keep you from expanding. Buddee is a master at procrastination. He will keep you from starting or completing any task. This is his way of coping with the anxiety that accompanies change.

If your actions are counterproductive or delay your new intention, you are caught in Buddee’s sabotage. He keeps you procrastinating so that you don’t escape his comfort zone.

Buddee has another finely tuned mechanism to interrupt momentum in your life. Rather than experience the uneasy feelings that arise with expansion and freedom, Buddee will point you to your familiar addictive patterns in an attempt to modulate your energy—keep you in your comfort zone.

Just as you have taken up a new way of being, he reminds you of the comfort that your past or present addictive behaviors have given you. He sends you back to the cigarettes, on to create drama, out to shop till you drop, or plops you down to surf the web. The frenetic activity of addiction attempts to keep you from feeling the huge influx of light that opens within you as you raise the state of your life. Buddee perceives this as foreign, thus dangerous. He wants you to panic and retreat from everything unfamiliar.

When you stay focused on your intention to change or expand your life, expect Buddee to show up to test you. He hammers you with reason, undermines you with doubt, keeps you in procrastination mode or activates addictive tendencies. You can get angry at his drag on your life and waste your energy in frustration. Or, you can accept him for what he is: an outdated program fraught with errors and lies that is holding you back from your potential.

Simple Tips to Enhance Dreaming

2011-04-26T06:37:00.000-07:00

Sleep in a clean uncluttered room.
Keep a journal for dreams next to your bed.
Incubate a dream 2-3 times per week.
De-charge your day before sleep. Ways to do that include: a bath or shower, sit by a fire or river, meditate or recapitulate your day. Put your thumb in the middle of a rose and do a personal mantra.
Vitamin B6, Mugwart tea, or a clear quartz crystal under your pillow will enhance dreaming.
Drink a glass of water before bedtime. Alcohol before bedtime will interfere with dreams.
Record your dreams during the night as you receive them or first thing in the morning. ***
Upon waking, keep your eyes closed and lie on your right side. Stay in a relaxed transition phase and notice how you feel, what messages are coming through and what dream images arise.
Title your dreams and take time to decode them.
Take action from your dream messages to integrate them into your conscious awareness.

3 Types of Suffering

2011-04-04T10:39:00.000-07:00

Suffering is a universal experience. It shows up in a myriad of forms in our lives, but each aspect that we endure can usually be categorized as mental anguish, emotional distress, physical pain or spiritual disconnection.

Our first instinct is typically to try to escape it whenever and however we can, yet often it pursues us. On occasion our methods of temporarily reducing the suffering in our lives can turn on us and lead to even more suffering as soon as our avoidance tactics become a habit. Unhealthy addictions begin here.

Consider for a moment that not all suffering is created equal.

Introduced here are three different types of suffering, which lead to three very different outcomes when understood with a different perspective.

Self-Induced Suffering ~ Needless Suffering

The first type of suffering, while often unconscious, is self-induced. It comes from our conditioning, the ways we were domesticated to fit in and survive in our life. When we learned to believe and think in ways that were acceptable to others, we often had to go against our true and authentic nature. This process of domestication is what sets up many patterns that cause us to suffer needlessly.

Our inner child cares about love and happiness. And while these may be strong values to the adults that raised us as well, we often find their own fear based patterning passed on to us. We do what it takes to survive in our family and often our survival strategies and protection are at odds with what is authentic to our love and happiness.

For many people, going against what is integral to authentic nature sets up a life of needless suffering. Unless we take on the task of cleaning our mind of faulty beliefs and creating a way of living happily, we are either tacitly accepting that suffering is a normal way to live or harboring the idea that this suffering has a purpose.

Self-inflicted suffering has no purpose, no meaning and no use. When this suffering causes us to go against ourselves, we are not seeing clearly, yet we are promoting a status quo of survival that arises from fear. Over time, our mental and emotional states, lead to physical and behavioral dysfunction and we suffer.

Fortunately, this is the one truly escapable type of suffering. Since it is self-inflicted, with awareness and the tools to shift beliefs and patterns of domestication, we have the power to alleviate it. The pathway to release ourselves from self-inflicted suffering leads us to Raise Our State.

Externally-induced Suffering ~ Love from the Universe

The second type of suffering, while not comfortable, has a purpose. This is suffering that comes as a result of past actions. This is known as karma, or in other terms, action-reaction. Some see it as, “What goes around comes around.”

This type of suffering is meant to get our attention. It often halts us in our tracks and asks us to see ourselves more clearly. It shifts us to discover more of who we are, how we operate and what we are here to do. Externally-induced suffering is a red flag, a type of love from the universe. When we drift off the course of loving, life pushes us back.

It may appear that life is against us when bad things happen and life feels too hard. Yet, this calls forth the energies needed to break open the limited understanding of ourselves and move us into the greater states of being - those we experience as peace, love, kindness and compassion.

When we are suffering from the events of life around us, we can take a deeper look at what life is trying to tell us. What is the message? What is the gift? What am I being nudged to grow into or out of? Love talks to us very directly though this type of suffering.

Spiritually-Induced Suffering ~ Longing

Spiritual suffering is a longing of the heart. Just as a child cries for its mother, our heart yearns to be connected to the One heart that permeates all creation, the vast love within us, to God.

As externally-induced suffering does its work on us, we begin to awaken to deeper levels of our being. And with this realization, we recognize that a direct connection to our deepest nature is not only possible but the one true thing that brings us closer to contentment. We discover that all the desires we have held were a means to reconnect with our source and the bliss of pure being.

Spiritually-induced suffering lasts as long as it takes for the suffering to fully open our heart. It is then that the clouds of confusion and separation part, our hearts true desire is met, and our suffering comes to an end.

Look closely at the ways you suffer. Notice what type may be present for you to examine right now. From this deeper understanding, discover how to deal with it with increased ease and acceptance.

Raise Your State™ teachings offers tools and guidance to release the trap of self-induced suffering. Simultaneously, you will gain strength and ability to weather the externally-induced suffering. As you Raise Your State, spiritually-induced suffering will be a far away reality.

Quiz ~ Are you suffering needlessly?

2011-04-03T19:51:00.000-07:00

This quiz is offered as an opportunity to check in with yourself. You can evaluate the condition of your mind and life. These questions below may appear a little daunting, as each of them describe habits that carry some degree of stress. Yet, the good news is that all of these habits can be relieved with awareness, deeper understanding and a choice to Raise Your State.

Use this opportunity to be honest with yourself without judgment. Hold a compassionate heart as you shine increased awareness on the state of your well-being by asking yourself these questions:

Is anxiety an all too familiar companion?
Does depression dampen your aliveness?
Is your inner judge a menacing voice in your head?
Do you stress and worry on a consistent basis?
Do you harbor resentment or find it hard to forgive?
Is approval seeking exhausting you?
Does self-doubt sabotage your dreams?
Are your thoughts scattered and confused?
Is guilt a familiar ‘go to’ place?
Are obsessive thoughts conflicting with your happiness?
Do you hear yourself asking, “What is wrong with me?
Are anger and defensiveness common ways you react to others?
Do you attempt to make people different than they are?
Do you push yourself to do more, get better or shape up?
Are ‘ought to, should and have to’ running your life?
Do you find yourself thinking, “This isn’t it!”

If too many of your answers are a familiar “yes”, you might consider that needless suffering has become a subtle or not so subtle visitor in your life. In fact needless suffering may be an addiction for you.

What I know to be true for most people is that they often do all they know how to do to decrease stressful habits and patterns. They read books, make promises to themselves to do things differently, take medication, go to therapy and yet they often fail to change the very ways that cause suffering. They end up frustrated and discouraged.

A quote that acknowledges one reason for this frustration comes from Albert Einstein: " We cannot solve a problem from the same consciousness from which it was created. We must do it from greater consciousness."

To Raise Your State is to access these greater fields of awareness where the power to transform old habitual ways is possible. You can shift what it is you want to shift in your life. Expanding into greater states allows you to discover new ways of thriving and an increased ability to choose your responses to life. In this way, you will relieve ways of needless suffering and at the same time you will recognize that greater ease, confidence and happiness become an everyday reality.

Make your home smile

2011-02-16T11:14:00.000-08:00

How nourishing is your home? How do you feel when you walk in the door? On a spectrum of heavy density—ugh…to highly refined—smile…….how does your home feel to you?

Our thoughts and feelings are alive and filled with energy that lies somewhere on the spectrum of dense to highly refined. Healthy thoughts and feelings are more refined; they are dynamic and flowing, and they uplift the balance in our space. Unhealthy thoughts and feelings create a deadening, stuck or chaotic vibration.

One way to refresh our home is to use an ancient ritual natural to many indigenous people. This is one of smudging to clear negative energies. Smudge sticks made of white sage, sweet grass or cedar are greatly effective in cleansing and heightening the energy of our home or office space.

Smudging our home is as important as cleaning our floor, dusting the furniture or doing the dishes. This weekly ritual is effective in cleansing our home of stagnant energy. It will release negative emotional energy that may still be lurking around from a bad mood yesterday, or a difficult conversation we had with our partner a week ago.

Take time weekly to add a new ritual to your housekeeping. Light a sage stick and then blow out the flames so that the smoke is left to fill every corner of every room. Walk into each room as you allow the smoke to purify. Give thanks to this shelter and acknowledge how it supports your life.

A large shell with a sage stick sitting in it is a graceful reminder that cleaning is beyond the physical. Smudging is a sacred ceremony that communicates: ‘You care about you and everyone who visits your space.' Nourish your home and nourish your life. Enjoy the smile you feel inside when your home is smiling too.

Dream Journal

2011-01-19T16:53:00.000-08:00

Creating a Dream Journal is a valuable way to awaken the spirit of your life. Catching your dreams, writing them down, and mining the gold within them is a spiritual practice and one that unfolds forever. It is an art and a practice to journal the messages given in your dream time. When you capture your dreams, you will experience being more awake and aware to who you are and what you are here to do.

Have you ever caught a dream in the middle of the night and think you will remember it in the morning.... only to find it has vanished. Dream symbols are fleeting and it is necessary to write them down the first moment you catch them, whether 2 am or early morning. If you wake up with a dream, write it down, even if you have no time to explore it.

Some mornings you may have no conscious recall of a dream, yet notice what feelings, thoughts or intuitive impulses are present when you first wake up. Be present to what goes on the first 30 minutes of your day. These early morning moments are still precious dreaming.

Once you have written down your dream, the first thing to look for is the turning point in your dream. A turning point shows up as an emotion or a sudden shift. The message you want to pay attention to will arrive after the turning point. Without the recognition of the turning point, the problem or challenge side of your dream may be interpreted as the solution. This can be a confusing message.

The symbols and people in your dream after the turning point are the actors in your play. Circle each symbol, person or action and ask yourself, “What is my association with this symbol?” “How is this person different than me?” " What is my connection or how would I describe this person?"

Finding associations in dream books won’t give you the potency of your own ability to unravel what your dreams are saying to you. Your dream language is based on what your association is with symbols, no one else can know this. Any dream guide can only lead you to your answers, as you are your own authority.

Right and left hand dialogue is a great tool to hear your unconscious more clearly. If your dominant hand is right, use it to ask your dream symbol what it knows. Allow your non-dominant left hand to respond with whatever message may come forth. Don’t be surprised if you can’t read your non-dominant hand-writing. What will happen is that you will discover its intelligence. Through this method, you will begin to bridge your unconscious messages with your conscious awareness.

Taking your dream messages into your outer waking life is a final step in bringing your dreams into reality. You can take an action you have been guided to take. Or, create a symbol, through any creative medium, that will reflect the message you have received. Once your unconscious message from your dream time becomes conscious and applied to your life, you will truly experience the power of dreaming.

Dream Incubation Ritual

2011-01-19T16:51:00.000-08:00

Dream incubation rituals make a direct request to your inner self. This is the deepest place of knowing inside that has all the information you need to know to be happy. Buried under the unconscious, your inner self is waiting to be heard and acknowledged.

A dream incubation ritual requires that you get clear on your intention. What is it you want to know? Do you want guidance for a creative project, a troubled relationship or an issue with your body? Maybe you are interested in the next step to raise your state. It is necessary to write the request rather than think it in your mind.

Preparation for dreaming sets the stage for your nightly sojourn. Create a clean environment and clear your mind from the stress and activity of your day. Meditation, prayer and yoga are a few ways to make a sacred space for dreaming. Your dream letter is the very last thing you do before sleep.

Dear Inner Self (God, Source, Universe), If it is your will, please show me in a dream tonight what you want me to know about ____________, so that I may come closer to you.

The key is to ask "what" you need to know rather than "why" or "when" questions. Your answers will always give you your next step and won’t give you anything you can’t handle. Fear not, your inner self is always taking care of you. If you have difficulty recalling your dreams, Vitamin B or a quartz crystal under your pillow will enhance your recall.

Take time the moment you wake up to record your dreams. Write about the symbols, intuit the energies and feelings that arise. You are on your way to developing a dream practice.