Anyone that has watched Maury knows that he has two main types of shows. It’s either the “I cheated on you/I have a secret” or “You Are (or Not) My Baby Daddy.” This second type of show is on the most. It’s on almost every day. If you need a laugh these shows are a perfect way to start your day. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not funny that these people don’t know who the father is or won’t admit the truth about their kids, but the actual shows are quite amusing.

I think the thing that cracks me up is the emotional level. Some of these women remind me of people that have been set on fire that are trying to get the fire out. They yell, scream, bob, and weave. Many of them go a step further by repeating themselves until you want to stab them in the throat to shut them up (”Come on Maury, Read the results. Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on!.)

When the results are read, there are two patented reactions. If the baby daddy is correct (the one they say it is) then they jump around like they just won the Super Bowl. This is done while pointing and getting in the father’s (I use that term loosely) face because they “told him.” If they are wrong about their choice then they run, screaming and crying, from the stage. These particular women spend so much time convincing themselves that the loser they picked to be the daddy really is that when he’s not they have a breakdown.

The men are sometimes even worse than the women though they are worse in different ways. They do cartwheels and the cabbage patch when they learn they are not the father. When they are the father, some man up and want to see the baby like they’ve been there all along, and others are nonchalant. They are worse when it comes to the before they come on stage videos. They are always so over the top.

“Jenny slept with every man in my building including the janitor! She’s a slut that’s been trying to get pregnant since she realized she had a vagina. She is not sticking me with that baby! It doesn’t even look like me. That slut needs to find her real baby daddy and leave me alone!” – To which the woman always replies….”Bring him out Maury” (multiplied by about 50).

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Post tags: Biological Parent, Connection, Dad, Maury, Mom, My Baby Daddy, Responsibility, Talk Shows

What are the qualifications for one to be addressed by the name mother (or any other associated terms…mom, mommy, mama…you know the drill). The first and most obvious answer would be giving birth.

Still, I don’t think it’s acceptable to leave it at that. In fact, I think the act of giving birth actually has little to do with the responsibility or interest in motherhood. Almost every woman can give birth. Not every woman has what it takes to be a mother.

That being said, we are back at our original question. What makes a mother? In answering this, I cannot help but think of my own mom.

My mother is one of the most selfless people that I have ever met. Despite the fact that my brother is 39 and I am 31, she still treats us like we are two years old. She attempts to clean up after our messes and always gives us hugs and kisses when we are down and out. If she had one dollar to her name she would gladly hand it over (with minimal complaint) to make sure that we had whatever we needed. These things are all very important, but the thing that stands out more than anything is that our mom loves us unconditionally.

No matter what I do and how much I feel I have messed up (if that is the case) I know that my mom will be there for me. I know she will love me no matter what. She won’t bail me out of my mistakes because she wants me to learn lessons from them, but she will still be there to love me anyway. She’s always the first one to be there to take care of me when I am sick and despite the fact that she nags me incessantly I know that she just does it because she wants me to be a better person. She wants me to have all the pleasures and advantages that she did not always have in life.

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Read the rest of What Makes a Mother? (182 words)

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Post tags: Child, Children, Definition, Important, Job, Kid, Label, Mom, Mother, Mothers Day, Rewarding

On Sunday, the Academy Awards will be giving a Humanitarian Award to Lewis for the service he has provided to the disabled community. When protesters pointed out that Lewis has done nothing but harm the disability movement, the Academy pointed out that Lewis has made over $800 Million in 42 years and as such, they should all shove it. I understand this is the only way that Lewis could have ever received an Oscar, but it is a Humanitarian Award. It leaves me wondering who will win next year.

Maybe Carrot Top will win for his contribution to fight poverty (he taught the poor to use 1-800-Call-ATT). There are so many other great men that like Lewis made one or two mistakes (or in his case 1,000,085,247). We can’t really fault them for that. We should just give them awards they don’t deserve. After all, it is not about the racially motivated, ableism or hateful things he says with prejudice. It’s about how he puts down the people that have managed to keep his name in the spotlight long after he deserved to be there.

The Academy claims he raised $800 Million on the telethons alone. Let’s break that down shall we?

$800 Million and 42 years comes to roughly $19,047,619 per year.

I’m hard pressed to say Lewis raised any of this money, which for the record, he didn’t. He only hosted a show. He did not organize, request donations, set up interviews, handle craft services, or synchronize all of the local events that occur around the nation on Labor Day. However, let’s pretend he did. If he was capable of such amazing good, maybe they should have let him distribute the money too, because with all that has been raised nothing has been accomplished.

The telethon accomplishes nothing other than raising money, which goes for administrative costs and Lewis’ travel expenses first and then to some programs, which are cut each year despite profit margins rising. I used to watch the telethon when I was a kid and it taught me two things.

1. I should never make fun of anyone with MD because tomorrow it could happen to me. I could wake up and magically be in a wheelchair. (The telethon has a tendency to be slightly dramatic)

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Read the rest of The Academy is Handing out Awards: Calling Carrot Top (624 words)

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Post tags: Academy Awards, Crippled, Discrimination, Fag, Jerry Lewis, MDA, Oscars

Back in the Day: 5 TV Shows You Loved As A Kid
The Muppet Show
Inspector Gadget
You Can’t Do That on Television
Doogie Howser MD
Roseanne

Who Would You Do?: 5 TV Characters You Would…Well, It’s Self-Explanatory
Jack Shephard
Jack Bauer
Emily Prentiss
Jackson “Jax” Teller
Dexter Morgan

“Tossed Salads and Scrambled Eggs”: 5 TV Theme Songs You Know (and Love) By Heart
Dexter (though it has no words technically)
The L Word
Big Love
Sons of Anarchy
Weeds

Eh: 5 Shows You Just Can’t Get Into
House
Friday Night Lights
30 Rock
Law & Order
The Office

The Starting Line-Up: 5 Channels You Go To First When You Sit Down to Watch TV
Showtime
HBO
ABC
CBS
FX

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Read the rest of Television Meme (473 words)

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Post tags: American Idol, Big Love, Dexter, Lost, Meme, Survey, Television, TV Meme, Weeds

Welcome to the month of Memes! Today we’re starting with the best decade short of maybe the 60s, but I’m not counting that because I wasn’t there for it.

1. How old were you in 1980?
2

2. How old were you in 1989?
11

3. Were you a Toys R’ Us Kid?
Everyone was, though I don’t think my mom shopped there because there wasn’t one real close to us in town.

4. Did you watch Transformers?
I do now, but back then I was more into Rainbow Brite, Strawberry Shortcake, the Carebears, and the Smurfs

5. Did you see E.T. on the big screen?
I didn’t get a chance to see that on the big screen sadly. I did see the Garbage Pail Kids though…twice! Now that was an experience!

6. Did you own a Lite Bright?
Yes!

7. Who is your favorite Golden Girl?
Sophia was my favorite, but she wasn’t technically a Golden Girl. If you’re talking one of the three I love Rose. There was something so comical about her killing her husband in bed. I loved it!

8. When someone says “Who you gonna call?”
Ghostbusters!

9. What was your favorite toy(s) in the eighties?
Pound Puppies, Rainbow Brite, Atari, Cabbage Patch (I had a French one I LOVED), Shirt Tales, and Strawberry Shortcake. I also loved to color and play outside.

10. Did you have a Pogo Ball?
No

11. Did you listen to New Kids on the Block?
Yes. I admit it. I was Hangin Tough for a while, but hey…who wasn’t?

12. What New Kid did you have a crush on?
None. I liked Marky Mark – Still do!

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Read the rest of 80s Meme (914 words)

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Post tags: 80s, Awesome Decade, Meme, Movies, National Lampoons, Toys

I don’t want to ask for help. I want to give it to other people. However, logic tells me that at some point in everyone’s life someone is going to need help. Yesterday, I posted an article about how Dominick needs an accessible van. We had been talking with friends about launching a website for Dominick that would allow us to eventually move out of our non-accessible home and today I broke virtual ground on A House 4 Dom.

I feel this website and this cause is important because:

1. Dominick is only able to get into two rooms in our house. In one room he has to be in his wheelchair. In the other room he has to be laying in bed.
2. He cannot get into our bathroom. In five years he has not had a shower. He’s had to sponge bathe.
3. Dominick cannot go anywhere socially. We do not live on a bus line and we do not have accessible transportation. It seems funny that Dominick can affect lives for the better, but he could never meet these people without getting some help of his own.
4. Dominick cannot get into our kitchen.
5. He misses out on things that would benefit his health.
6. He never complains about all that he needs. Instead, he tries to focus on what someone else needs instead.

This alone would make me want to help him, if I had anything more to give. However, there is more to the story that I never considered mentioning until now. Our 14 year old, we call CT, could also benefit from a new home, for different reasons.

CT is on the Autistic Spectrum. He was abused by the school system as a child and we decided to bring him home and homeschool him. He does well, but he has a social disorder and needs good therapy and he needs social interaction to help him begin to understand people as much as he can. We tried to get him involved in the homeschool group here in our area, but the mother’s felt that CT’s “illness” might rub off on their children. While they have been polite in sending every mother with a disabled child in the county my email, they did little else to help my son or his self-esteem.

Likewise, after having a therapist or two quit on the fly, the best option for therapy in the area, no longer seems to be a viable solution because it only reminds CT of the people that abandoned him. He doesn’t understand when people get a job. He understands a personal connection that he had and lost.

CT moving to another county would help him because:

1. He would be able to be involved in one of the best Autism Programs in the state
2. He would receive group and individual therapy with Asperger specialists that are known worldwide
3. He would be placed in an excellent homeschool group with parents that have children that are understanding to special needs, some of them are “normal” and others are in wheelchairs or have problems similar to CT. The important thing is that they all want to be friends and help each other out.
4. He would be able to become involved in Social Skills Groups and Services that are not available where we live.
5. He would benefit educationally from a better cultural environment and from nearby Summer Camps that he has expressed interest in.
6. It would be a new start for a little boy that feels the people that are supposed to help him have given up on him.

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Read the rest of I Can’t Help But Feel Selfish (243 words)

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Post tags: A House 4 Dom, Accessible Van, Aspergers Syndrome, Autistic Spectrum, Crimson Twilight, Dominick Evans, Group Therapy, Wheelchair

Over the years, I have learned a lot from Dominick. He has taught me that having a gift and a dream are special and that it’s your obligation to do everything you can to make those dreams become reality. He is creative, amazingly talented, and he has a gift for social media. He inspires people and makes them want to do good things. I only wish I could do half the things that he does without an apparent effort.

In the years I have known him I have been proud to say that he is my best friend. I would give him everything I could and I wouldn’t think twice. There is one thing that Dominick needs more than anything that I can’t give him though and that is an accessible van.

Dominick is in a wheelchair due to a form of Muscular Dystrophy. Despite being one of the most intelligent and creative people I know, Dominick has been unable to travel or really even get out of our house in five years. Can you imagine not being able to go to a store or the movies, even to the gas station for five years? Dominick can and the funny thing is, I never hear him complain. He wakes up every single day trying to think of ways to help other people.

Accessible vans cost more than $30,000.00 and if I had it I would write a check tomorrow, but I don’t. In all honesty, it breaks my heart that I don’t. So, I thought long and hard about what I could do to see that his dreams of going back to college come true, and I am calling on the power of social media to help me.

I might not have the $30,000.00 and I am sure that you don’t either. You might have $5 though or more. If everyone that could give managed to spare a few dollars, and everyone that couldn’t posted this on their own blogs or Twitter than Dominick would be well on his way to enrolling in the University of Michigan like he has planned. He’d be able to go out and do things that everyone, including myself, takes for granted.

This small deed could change a man’s life.

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Read the rest of My Best Friend Needs Your Help (98 words)

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Post tags: Accessible Van, Dominick Evans, Donate, Muscular Dystrophy, Social Media, Spread the Word

I get plenty of email all day long. Some of it comes from PR people that are interested in pitching products for our review blog. Lately, one of the PR people has being pitching Autism United to me. I am assuming that they are sending these messages because they want press. The reason I see it this way is because after reading their press releases there is no way I would have went to their website and supported it enough to sign up for any form of solicited mail. In short, Autism United is spamming me and they are doing it every single chance they get!

I am not sure if they think that preying on celebrities that aren’t as diluted as Jenny McCarthy is going to gain my respect, but when they are calling on grieving celebrities they are going about it in a way that signifies that it’s never going to happen.

Recently John Travolta and his wife of nearly 20 years, Kelly Preston suffered a devastating loss when their son, Jett passed away. Many reporters, press, and bloggers are attempting to hang them out to dry on the issue of whether or not their son had a developmental disability and whether or not they chose to do anything because of their religion. While I have my moments of bluntness and cruelty, I have always thought that when it comes to grieving the loss of a child, the parent deserves a day off. My thoughts are with the Travolta’s in their darkest hour and I hope that they are all recovering from their loss as best they can.

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Read the rest of Autism United is Seriously Disgusting! (360 words)

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Post tags: Autism, Autism United, Cure, Death, Grieving, Jenny McCarthy, Jett Travolta, John Travolta, Kelly Preston

The family, which in this case consists of my mother and brother, headed out to Home Depot and then to Target. The transaction at Home Depot was flawless as usual, but I cannot say the same for Target. In fact, after the attitudes and issues that I encountered today I would be hesitant to return to Target.

We were picking up a few things that needed to be loaded up for us because they wouldn’t fit on a cart. We purchased a desk and hutch, a desk chair, and a television stand. All in all, it came to just under $400. I don’t have a problem with the price, but when the customer service was as poor as it was and the store has as many issues as this one seemed to, it makes it feel like I spent a lot more money.

We knew what we wanted immediately upon arrival. My mother went to look for a sales associate to load the items up so we could pay and leave. We are all busy people and wanted to get in and out. Unfortunately, Target is under-staffed (during the holidays) so it took a good ten minutes to find someone that could call someone else to help us.

After my mom made it back it took a good 20 minutes for Lisa to arrive. You probably have a Lisa in one of your stores. She has a chip on her shoulder, thinks you should wait for her, and assumes because she is helping you that you owe her something. She was obviously a really nice girl.

Being that the store was understaffed, helping just us was not an option. Instead, she helped three customers at the same time, us and two other customers. They loaded up our items first and while we went to look for a lamp (two aisles down) Lisa disappeared. We assumed that she went up to the registers so that’s where we went. When Lisa didn’t arrive that’s when we learned that she had actually went off to help the other people and load up their things, too.

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Read the rest of Target = FAIL (303 words)

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Post tags: Bad Attitude, Bad Service, FAIL, Lisa, Shopping, Target, Under Staffed

I have to watch this movie soon. I don’t know why, but it’s one of my favorite in the series. I think my order of favorites go:

-European Vacation
-Christmas Vacation
-Vacation (the first where they go to Wally World)
-Vegas

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Read the rest of Saturday Morning Movie Clip: European Vacation (46 words)

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Post tags: Clark, Ellen, European Vacation, Jack, New Looks, Rusty and Audrey, Shopping, The Griswolds, Video Clip