FOUR Bedroom Habits That Should Go BUST

You don’t MAKE LOVE, you just do things to reach an orgasm. This is probably the biggest gripe of women against us men folk: sex is like a race to the ejaculation finish line. Oh, where have the days gone when you used to engage in foreplay for hours? This is what women want from us once in a while. You know, savor the journey instead of focusing on the destination.

You know your TV guide, better than your woman. A lot of men can’t seem to tune into sex until they’ve tuned out their TV sets. I know you need to unwind when you come home but for some nights at least, resist the urge to watch any TV. Almost scandalous during these times I know, but trust me, this one pays wonders in the bedroom!

Try this tonight: make it all about lovemaking tonight. The minute you arrive home, make sexual innuendos; start caressing a part of her body when no one’s looking; carry on flirting until you guys are in bed (or on top of the coffee table) and engaging in hot sex.Friday nights=poker nights; Saturday nights=sex. Nothing can be LESS romantic than sex on a schedule. If you engage in sex only on certain days (or worse, only on certain occasions), then chances are you are also using the exact same sexual moves, right? And then sex is all over in exactly 11.5 minutes.

Bust this habit! I know that it’s hard to get rid of something that’s so ingrained in your relationship already so try something that will jumpstart it again. For instance, buy your woman sexy, hot, see-through lingerie; subscribe to adult magazines; rent adult movies and watch them together. At this stage, you need a MAJOR injection of thrill in your relationship so do that and busting your sex schedule will occur naturally.

Be More Spontaneous

Why is it that we men are bent on treating our women like ‘eggshells’ or ‘proper ladies’ in the bedroom? Don’t you remember how being so hot and dirty earlier in your relationship resulted in the best sex ever?

And guess what? Women don’t always want tenderness between the sheets either! In fact, a lot of women will appreciate a little more excitement in the bedroom every now and then. (Just remember not to scare her by whipping out a pair of handcuffs right in the middle of sex!)

So just be a tad more adventurous tonight… for starters anyway. For example, when going oral, instead of going down on her, ask her to sit on your face instead. If she loves woman on top, try reverse woman on top where she faces your feet. If you guys always go missionary OR doggy-style, try one after the other tonight!

Take just a minute to check out ‘The Female Orgasm Black Book’: “How To Give Her Mind Numbing, Leg Shaking Orgasms”

Related articles:

1. How to Induce Sexual Desire In Your Bedroom
2. The 5 Biggest Mistakes Men Make In Bed - Are You Guilty? (Video)
3. 5 Ways to Turn Your Bedroom Into a Sex Magnet
4. 3 Mistakes Men Make That Causes Women To NOT Have Sex With Them Ever Again!
5. Erotic Massage: How Erotic Touch Can Turn Up the Heat in Your Bedroom

Your Local Health Department

Your local health department is probably step one when it comes to getting the best free or reduced cost health and sex services. Believe it or not, your local health deparment will provide services including free or reduced cost physical exams, breast exams and pap smears, as well as sexually transmitted disease testing and sexually transmitted infection treatment. Many health departments offer free birth control supplies including condoms and birth control pills, as well as other hormonal birth control methods such as the IUD, the diaphragm, the birth control ring or the birth control patch or shot.

Find your local health department by visiting Health Guide USA and clicking on “local health departments.”

SexEtc.org

SexEtc.org is a great sex education resource for teens. It’s an easy to navigate website with full feature videos, forums and articles on the sex topics teens really want to know about. The best thing about SexEtc.org? It’s written by teens, for teens! Most teenagers hate the “condescending” feel of sex education from adults, and SexEtc.org gives teens the information they need from their very own peers. Teens can even chat and participate in polls on everything from their first time to homophobic bullying and more. If you are a teen or are a teen’s parent, definitely check out SexEtc.org!

Scarleteen.com

Scarleteen.com is another teen oriented sex education website with lots of useful information presented in a way that teens and even young adults can understand and relate to. This website is article heavy, but the articles are precisely on the topics that teens today want to know about, such as male reproductive choices, how guys can prevent rape and even more topics for girls! When researching sex ed topics, be sure to look at several credible websites and use your own judgement - most of the time, if you see similar information on a topic come up again and again on different websites, you can trust that the information is reliable.

Positive.org

The message given by Positive.org is a simple yet powerful one - you have the right to complete and honest sex education! A little less colorful than some of the other teen centered websites, Positive.org appeals not only to many teens but also adults of all ages who want the straight facts on sex. This site is a little more difficult to navigate, but talks about every sex topic you could possibly want to know about, including information about STD’s and STI’s, homosexuality, teen sex, safer sex, pregnancy prevention and much, much more.

Sexuality.org

Sexuality.org is a more adult oriented sex education website and is like an online book with lots of information available. Read articles about sexuality topics, review guides on educational books and videos, and check out transcripts of presentations from popular therapists, doctors and other notable figures. Sexuality.org offers lots of different perspectives on topics from erotic massage, tantra and BDSM, as well as other sex education topics such as pregnancy, birth control and STD and STI prevention.

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5. Parents. You ARE The Sex Ed Teacher.

Distinguishing Between The Truth And A Lie

It’s all well and good to ask something you just met an important question, like ‘Are you married?’ or ‘Do you have an STD?’ but if they lie about the answer, it’ll render your fact-finding mission null and void! The short answer is—you really can’t—so my nutshell advice is: don’t sleep with them until you find out for sure! And even then, there are thirteen or so other questions you need to know before you even consider entering into that sacred contract and dropping your drawers! That’s right. It should be much more of a process than we often make it out to be.

So back to the dog: So I see this crumpled up thing—it’s green. Does not resemble regular puppy paraphernalia from a distance. I hone in and as I get closer I realize it looks suspiciously like money. I lean down to reclaim what turns out to be a tattered half of a ten dollar bill. I look round for the rest and find a few other scraps that match and now I am on a mission to reconstruct this note—to no avail, I am afraid. (Fortunately, my 17-year-old walked in and informed me casually that as long as I have 52% or more of it the bill, I could take it to the bank and get the full value in exchange.) Suddenly am left to ponder why dogs seem to have so little discrimination— I ended up telling myself, “She’s a dog, that’s what they do” and left it at that. Number one, because I couldn’t ask her, and number two, it wasn’t something I cared enough about to waste any more time over.

So what does this have to do with the earlier question which is, how will you know when someone is telling you the truth? Well, unlike my dog, the person you are interviewing as a potential partner can speak (although sometimes you may wonder if they, in fact, can — but unlike my dog, you cannot come to conclusions about who they are and why they do things as easily – at least not without potentially putting yourself in harm’s way.

If my dog COULD speak, and I asked her why she ate the money, being a dog she would probably say ‘cause it was there. As for your interviewees, they have brains that have well-developed behavior patterns and strong personality tendencies to go with them, and it is your job to take care to research whether or not what this person does and says match. THIS is how you can not only determine if they’re telling the truth, but determine what type of people they are: trustworthy, honest, liars, sneaky, etc.

Would You Rather Dare?

In real life when it comes to human beings, you will have to take this kind of vigilance and commitment over time—and bottom line, that’s what it takes to know if people are who they say they are! You must train yourself to watch what people say and what they do and make sure they match (before you drop your drawers). The good news is, we all have a few basic abilities that make us able to do this:

1). Our intuition, that gut feeling, whatever you want to call it, when you know or suspect or guess, deep down, something is or isn’t right.

2). We have the abilities to be logical and reasonable and we must use these skills to determine what our next steps will be with a potential partner.

The bad news is, too many of us have pushed these skills, intuition and reason down, down, down until we’re not used to listening to and trusting ourselves. And that makes it hard to determine if we should trust somebody else!

Related articles:

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Dear Dan and Jennifer,

My girlfriend doesn’t like anal sex but I do. I mean, I really do! It’s something I want to experience with her - how can I get her to do it with me?

–Jason, MO

Give Her A Hint

If you want your partner to really get into anal sex, the best method of approach isn’t a blunt one. Hint at anal sex during regular sex by caressing your partner’s buttocks during sex, tickle her anus with a feather or your fingers and perhaps even get her involved with playing around your anus. Don’t do anything drastic at this point - if she’ll let you, a little hot finger play around her anus is all you want to go for right now. Start hinting around in this manner with your partner a month or two before you really want to take the plunge into anal sex. She’ll really need a mental warm up before she’s ready.

Get Her Emotionally Ready

Believe it or not, anal sex is a huge emotional step for a woman. It’s a “taboo” and very submissive act. She’ll need time to get mentally prepared for anal sex, so a couple weeks after you start introducing the light finger play, talk to her about anal sex. You don’t necessarily have to have a “sit down” talk with her about it - that might actually intimidate her. Try watching a pornography together that features anal sex and talk to your partner about how much it turns you on. Watch your language though - make sure she gets the idea that it would turn you on to have her do that with you and not that you simply think anal sex is hot.

If She’s Interested

If you’ve gotten your partner to accept the idea of having anal sex with you, congrats! It’s not over yet though. If you want to have anal sex with your partner more than once, it’s important to make sure that you make this experience a positive one for her. First, get a good, solid bottle of water based lubricant. Don’t be shy with it either! Make sure you use plenty of lubricant. The anus is not self lubricating, so use as much lubricant as you like - you definitely can’t use too much! Start slow and be gentle - the anus is not a place to have rough sex. It’s not made to accommodate something go in, so it can tear quite easily. Give your partner a lot of warm up time, and give yourself time to enjoy it!

Extra Tips

Always wash your penis after anal sex. Bacteria can spread, especially to the vagina. Never insert your penis into the vagina after anal sex unless you’ve thoroughly washed it, because your partner can get some pretty nasty infections that way. If you’re not in a faithful, monogamous relationship with someone who is STD and STI free, wear a condom during anal sex. Anal sex actually has a higher rate of STD and STI transmission than traditional intercourse! If you just want to be safe, wear a condom anyway. After having anal sex with your partner, make sure you tell her you love her and that you still respect her!

Take just a minute to check out ‘The Sex God Method’: “If You Want to Give Women Screaming Orgasms, This Video May Be The Most Important Video You’ll Ever Watch”

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Skin to Skin Contact

The Pattie Cake

With your pointer and middle fingers, gently pat your clitoris. Vary the pressure and the speed. Your little man in the boat will stand at attention. Your inner labia and clitoris will feel sticky sweet and warm up. The inside of your vagina will overflow with your love fluid. Directly before you come, push those same two fingers into your sticky sweetness. Rub the natural lubricant from inside of you onto your clitoris, and rub hard until you come.

The Sandwich Cookie

Imagine your first two fingers as the hard cookies that sandwich a creamy filling. Gently grip your clitoris between your first two fingers. Stroke your clitoris with your other hand. Vary the pressure and speed until you come.

The Open-Faced Sandwich

Use the palm of your outstretched hand, gently pat and then push down gently. Continue with this rhythm until you begin to feel hot. When you are almost to the end, just push and let go, push and let go, never letting your hand leave skin contact.

The Pulsing Pelvis

Begin touching yourself with your fingers how you like it the best. Start to softly contract your leg muscles in order for your pelvis to gently pulse in a rhythm reminiscent of lovemaking with a partner. Rock up and down, up and down, until you come.

Take a Dip

In the Pool

Spread your legs as far as you can while positioning yourself in front of one of the jets in your pool or hot tub. Stand far enough away from the jet so it is not uncomfortable for you, then move closer and closer until the stimulation is just the right amount to jet you into orgasm.

With Your Shower Head

Use your handheld shower head to masturbate. Actually take the shower head off of its hook and press it on your clitoris. Rub softly. Rub firmly. Alternate between the two extremes, or find a middle ground. Always synchronize your motions to escalate the masturbation experience.

In Your Bathtub

Get into your dry bathtub and sit directly underneath the faucet. Make sure the faucet is aimed directly at your clitoris. Turn the water on warm and let the flow of water hit your clitoris. Use your elbows to hold up your upper body and stick your hands underneath your butt. Right before your orgasm, turn the water temperature to hot … a comfortable hot … and let yourself come.

Common Toys

Dig the Shovel

You can use whatever object turns you on. Pick out a vibrator or anything you like. Mimicking a gently digging motion, use the toy to play with your clitoris. Slide your toy down your clitoris, across your clitoris, and upward, removing the object entirely from your body. Repeat until you reach orgasm.

It’s Electric

When using an electric toothbrush to stimulate your clitoris, simply use it as if it were a vibrator. Touch softly at first, and then as you get more excited, get into a rhythm of hard, soft, or medium pressure. Go up, down, all around, in little circles. Find the motion that suits you the best.

A Play Station

Use a Metal Gear Solid CD on your Sony Playstation, and grab the vibrating controller. Follow the same instructions for the electric toothbrush and the rest is easy. Find yourself. You’ll figure out what to do.

If you have already tried all of the above masturbation tips for women, try adding your own personalized touch on variations to these techniques. If this still isn’t doing it for you, stay tuned for the next set of tips from the professionals.

If you follow the previous tips, you too will experience the self-satisfying beauty of climactic joy through masturbation. When you find something new that works for you, you can share your little secret with your partner.

Take just a minute to check out ‘Faster Female Orgasm’: “How To Reach Orgasm During Intercourse In Just 5 Minutes (Or Less)”

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Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’ve had sex with a few guys, but they all seem to be doing something wrong in the bedroom and I can’t put my finger on it! Is this a common thing? Do a lot of guys make mistakes in bed and if so, exactly what mistakes are they making?

–Judy, LA

When A Man Isn’t Dominant In Bed

Women are drawn to confident men both emotionally and sexually. In bed, one of the biggest mistakes a man can make is expecting the woman to lead and make all the moves. Sometimes women want to be dominant, but more often, women want a man who knows what he wants and isn’t afraid to let a woman know. Don’t be shy about taking the lead in bed – if you want her to go down on you, let her know! If you want to make love to her, just go for it! No girl wants a jerk, but every girl is drawn to a man that is enough of an alpha male that he can take control and she can simply surrender.

When A Man Is Emotionally Distant

You might not think your emotions are involved in the bedroom, but they definitely are, whether you’re with a long time partner or in a new relationship. If you stand behind an emotional wall outside of the bedroom, you’re going to stand behind one inside the bedroom too. Not letting your partner get emotionally close to you during sex really puts her off – you seem indifferent to her, as though you could sleep with her or not and that it doesn’t matter. A woman doesn’t want to think you’re indifferent about sex! Let her in emotionally, let her know that you want her and she will want you right back.

When Men Become Boring And Predictable

Most men get excited when they find a sex technique that a girl likes. They get so excited that they want to repeat that technique over and over, because if it worked the first time, why wouldn’t it work the next twenty times? Girls don’t want a man to become predictable – they want him to be passionate and interested in finding new things that please them. So try new positions, try using sex toys and try lots of different things so you can find several things that she likes and always keep her guessing at what is going to happen next.

When A Man Is Technique Obsessed

Many men are interested in learning lots of techniques that make them better lovers – and kudos to them for taking the initiative to learn more about what a woman wants! But some men become obsessed with technique, to the point of leaving out the emotions and spontaneity of great sex. Don’t let your brain get overwhelmed with techniques – even if something doesn’t work exactly like the book says, go with the flow and focus more on having a great time and giving your partner pleasure.

When Men Pretend To Know Everything

Some men have all the techniques down pat, and others just pretend that they do. The only problem with that is that women can see right through it! Don’t worry about looking like you know exactly what you’re doing. Worry more about learning about how to do things right and being yourself in the process!

Take just a minute to check out ‘The Sex God Method’: “If You Want to Give Women Screaming Orgasms, This May Be The Most Important Video You’ll Ever Watch”

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It may not take a lot to ensure that your boyfriend/husband/lover reaches a climax but the ‘intensity’ of that peak is what we’re talking about here. So ladies, to stand out from all the rest listen up because you’ll now learn how to truly treat him to mind-blowing sex. The secret? Knowing his secret sex zones.

That’s right, men - just like us women - have certain pleasure buttons too and if you know where they are and, more importantly, HOW to stimulate them then you’ll soon make him scream in bed.

So in the interest of ’science’, I and couple more female friends, took it upon ourselves to experiment so that we can give you the low-down on male sex zones.

HIS Hot Zone # 1: Cremaster 101

You may be thinking we made up this name but seriously, there IS such a word as cremaster and it’s a muscle that covers the male testicles. This wonder muscle works pretty much like a bungee cord or rope and it pulls the testicles up (when they’re exposed to cold) and down (when they’re exposed to warmth). You can thus say that the purpose of cremaster is to ensure that the testicles are protected by regulating temperature.

How to master the cremaster: When your partner is just about to come, his testicles retreat. Think of it as a spring coiling tight before the big deployment! It’s of course the cremaster that’s making this ‘coiling’ possible. In contrast, lightly pulling down on his family jewels while making love helps delay ejaculation, thus extending pleasure. So, if you want him to be delirious without pleasure for a long time, make sure you are delaying the effects of the cremaster!

For instance, as you perform fellatio, make sure that you are gently pulling or tugging at his balls. Your tongue action on his member will make him want to explode, but your pulling action is preventing the cremaster from tightening and pulling the testicles up to the point that he reaches a climax. It’s sort of like finding the secret to lasting all night!

As you try the tip above, be sure that you’re not tugging too hard. Remember you want to delay his climax while providing pleasure. You want a deep moan out of him, not a shout of pain.

HIS Hot Zone # 2: The P-Spot

If we women have the G-spot (Gräfenberg spot), men have the P-spot or what is called the prostate, which is actually a gland that holds a fluid that gets ejected with semen as he climaxes. The prostate is just about the size of a walnut and it surrounds the urethra. And just like our g-spots, when the prostate is stimulated, he can be in for a very wild erotic ride.

How to master the P-spot: To stimulate his prostate, you need to know about the corpus cavernosa first. These tissues run over the length of the penis (from the pubic bone to the penis head) and are actually the ways by which blood pumps to the penis, making it erect.

So to cut the long story short, stimulate his penis and you, in effect, stimulate his P-spot. What’s the best way to do this, you ask?

Wrap your dainty hand around his member and instead of making an up and down motion as you normally would, push your hand - gently! - towards him. The result? The corpus cavernosa tissues will go down and ‘cuddle’ the prostate.

HIS Hot Zone #3: Perineum

The perineum is that diamond-shaped area between his balls and back door. It feels slight hard to the touch but it’s jam-packed with nerve endings that can easily send him to erotic heaven!

How to master the perineum: You can stimulate the perineum anytime you wish since it’s pretty much located at an ‘accessible’ angle. However, what a lot of women forget is to stimulate it just when he’s about to come.

For instance, most men seem to prefer to be in the missionary position when they’re ready to explode. So, when you sense that he’s nearing his climax, simply reach down between his legs and press this diamond-shaped pleasure nub with the knuckle of your index finger. Why the knuckle? Well, it really is sensitive so you want to avoid scratching him there. You want him to shout in pleasure and not to shout (at you!) in annoyances or pain.

If on the other hand, you want to stimulate the perineum at the onset of lovemaking, think of it as his clitoris. By this, we mean you should make sure that you are applying various degrees and types of pleasure. (Isn’t it that our clitoris sort of becomes immune, if not even irritated, if it’s constantly treated to the exact same treatment or pressure?)

So be sure that you massage, draw lazy circles, press and ease away, and pretty much keep his perineum point on the edge as you stimulate him.

HIS Hot Zone #4: Lips

Well, what do you know, one of his erogenous zones is one of ours too: the lips. This is not surprisingly really. After all, the membranes that make up the lips are packed with nerve endings. So the next time you think that he’s not much of a kisser, give him a lip treat that will MAKE him want to be kissed over and over again.

How to master his lips: It’s soooo easy to kiss your partner on the lips that you probably just go ahead and plant a big wet one anytime you like. Well, this time, make him beg for it by kissing him everywhere… EXCEPT on the lips. And make him really anticipate it too by making sure you plant really wet, sloppy kisses elsewhere on his body. Make sure you apply various kisses too: wet ones, hard ones, quick ones, sucking ones, you get the idea.

All these moves will make him want you to kiss him full on the lips soon. And when you finally ‘give in’, make sure you do various things such as lining his lips with your tongue, and when they’re wet, exhale gently on them. This wet-cool technique will drive him WILD!

His Hot Zone #5: Nipples

Remember the times when you thought you were almost ‘coming’ because he’s soooo good licking, grazing and sucking your nipples? Well, guess what, you can apply the same delirious pleasure on him.

True, his nipples are not as ‘obvious’ as ours even when they’re hard and erect. However, those little nubs are still packed full of pleasure nerves that you can tap!

How to master his nipples: Start off by kissing, licking and breathing your hot breath on his nipples. That would make them erect enough! Now, as you go on your favorite woman-on-top position, give him a double sensory delight. By this, we mean make his eyes dance with delight as your bosom jiggles up and down in front of you as you ride him. While this is going on, reach out and draw lazy circles around his nipples! We guarantee, he won’t know to which pleasure he should focus on!

So there you have it; five secret sex zones for you to play with tonight. Enjoy!

Take just a minute to check out ‘Blow His Mind Tonight’: “What Your Man Secretly Wishes You Knew About Oral Sex… But Will Never, Ever Tell You To Your Face!”

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High End Vibrators

While there are a number of modestly priced vibrators that are easily available for purchase, they often will break quickly or won’t do the job right. If you want a quality, whisper quiet vibrator, your best bet is to go with a high end vibrator. Although these types are more expensive than ones that you’ll find in novelty stores, you will get so much more for your money. If you’ve ever bought cheaper products and ended up having to replace them several times, you might already know that a more expensive product will actually save you money in the long run. But what if you could find the perfect vibrator with everything you wanted that was sleek and discreet? Believe it or not, sex toys have come a long way from the tacky dildos of the past and the perfect vibrator isn’t just wishful thinking anymore.

Lelo Vibrators

Want the ultimate class available in a vibrator? Lelo’s sleek toys are among the best the world has to offer in vibrators and you’ll be surprised at how well they do the job. The ultra sleek, Nea clitoral massager fits right in the palm of your hand and is incredibly quiet, while the GiGi will give you rocking G-Spot orgasms in mere minutes. Lelo’s toys are made with body safe materials and are discreet enough to bring along with you anywhere. Don’t forget about the super chic men’s toys available from Lelo - say goodbye to bulky, tacky anal plugs and say hello to “Bob”: the sleekest, most stylish ‘gentleman’s’ plug available.

Jimmy Jane Toys

Jimmy Jane’s products come in a variety of styles and colors, offering exquisite pleasure with the widest array of choices. Why limit yourself when it comes to your own pleasure? Try a classier version of the iconic “Rabbit” vibrator, or explore the incredible completely waterproof, rechargable Form 6 vibrator with a cordless charging dock. If you really want to wrap yourself in luxury, indulge in one of Jimmy Jane’s famous slim vibrators in real platinum or real gold, adorned with almost a carat of conflict-free diamonds. Set the mood with Jimmy Jane’s ultra luxurious fantasy suede play sets, or scent your room with sexy, delicious emollient candles. And for the men and their partners to use simultaneously, the Iconic Ring is a waterproof penis ring that will keep you erect and titillate your partner’s clitoris in a chic and modern way!

Vibrators can be a great addition to your sex life whether you’re flying solo or with a partner. Finding the right vibrator for you doesn’t have to be an ordeal of spending tons of money just to be disappointed. Just put together what you would have spent on a multitude of cheaper, tackier vibrators and just buy one luxe, perfect vibrator that you’ll keep for the rest of your life. Who says pleasure isn’t a smart investment?

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During the few times you’ve managed to reach a climax with your lover, it felt GREAT, right?

So why not apply a few tactics to guarantee the process to bliss? How? Easy. Just learn MORE regarding your own body. The more you know about what makes you tic sexually, the sooner your climax will be. I asked a few sexuality experts to help us out and following are their wonderful tips. Try them all and figure out which one works best for you. Who knows, they may ALL work for you.

Self-Pleasuring 101

Firstly, engage a little ALONE time naked. As you stimulate yourself, concentrate to the state of your mind and how your body reacts up until you reach your climax. Later, when you are with your man, try to re-create these moves.

It’s also imperative to develop an exciting mood. The idea is to establish a scenario that supports a very sexy mindset. For example, sure, you may know what ‘moves’ to apply to induce orgasm but if you open your eyes and see clutter all around, that will zap your sexual mood. Try soft pillows, scented candles, and soft, romantic music. Find out what ambiance works for you and go about ’staging it’.

Create A Mental Sex Picture

When it comes to sex, men are visual creatures, whereas females are more mental ones. To put it in simple terms, we women like to be ’sexed up’ up down there before he even makes a move. So to help you reach your orgasm sooner during sex, think of all the hot and sexy things he’s going to do to you (or that you want him to do) tonight. Paint a sexy mental picture and you’ll find that you will be twice more excited as he actually goes about doing the deed.

If visualization is not enough, don’t be afraid to engage in a little self-pleasuring. However, you should NOT reach a climax. Just make things hot - but not too hot - for yourself. When you make love with your partner, your body will instinctively start from where you left off earlier, making orgasm within easy reach.

Sure-Fire Orgasmic Sexual Positions

Females have two major sexual key points: the clitoris and the G-spot. The G-spot, or the Grafenberg spot, is located about 2-3 inches up the front of your vaginal wall. And one of the best ways to locate this spot is to insert your (or his!) index and middle fingers, palm up, inside you and search for a slight bump (like the clitoris, the G-Spot gets engorged when stimulated). So it makes sense that the straight road to orgasm is to stimulate both these sex zones simultaneously!

For instant stimulation of both these areas, woman-on-top seems to be the winning position. This is because in this position, you get to control the angle by which his penis hits your G-spot, the depth of penetration, and other factors.

Now, I did say double stimulation, right? So for your clitoris, give it the attention it deserves by grinding your front against his body. Be sure to try various speeds and movements. For instance, make your hips grind against him in a circular fashion rather than going up and down. This way, you get to stimulate the clitoris as you move up, and his penis gets to hit your g-spot as you move down.

Of course, there’s also the doggy-style position. In this position, his penis is angled almost dead on your G-spot!

If he’s gifted in the size department down there, he may even hit your A-spot, a place some scientists think is capable of producing mind-numbing orgasms too. At the very least, going on all fours enables you to NOT face your lover if you’re the shy type.

If you want to increase the pleasure you feel, you can also squeeze your pubococcygeus (PC) muscles (the ones you use when you try to stem the flow of your urine) during sex. By squeezing these muscles, you are pulling your clitoris and vagina inwards, increasing the level of friction against them as he thrusts.

How to Maximize Your Pleasure

A woman’s body has many sexual secrets. There are a lot of erotic nooks and crannies. The key is to be able to stimulate as many hot buttons as possible at any given time.

For instance, I just love it when my man goes all oral on me. But when he reaches upwards too to fondle my erect nipples as his tongue does his magic down there, I get to the Big O faster than I can blink!

You can also try the ‘reverse cow girl’ position, where you go on top of him but are facing his feet. This position enables you to have your G-spot stimulated by his penis… while your hands are busy stimulating your C-spot at the front. And of course, encourage to multi-task too! Whatever position, tell him to touch, caress, lick and rub anywhere!

Gadgets to Speed Up the Big O

Sometimes, a few sex toys increase the pace to a mind-blowing orgasm. For instance, too much thrusting can make your vagina a tad dry so why not use a bit of lubricant so that everything flows (pun intended) smoothly?

Also, why not experiment with some sex gadgets? For instance, whip out the vibrator and really give your clit a titillating time. If you think this will offend your lover then just slip on a ‘finger vibrator’ on him, which will help, rather than replace, his stimulating moves. For his pleasure, why not put on a penis ring? There’s also buzz toys that you can place between your bodies to give you both a tingly feeling each time you grind against each other.

Orgasmic timing is always a bone of contention between males and females. Bridge that climactic gap by finding ways to speed up yours. It’s a win-win situation so go for it!

Take just a minute to check out ‘Faster Female Orgasm’: “How To Reach Orgasm During Intercourse In Just 5 Minutes (Or Less)”

Related articles:

1. The C-Spot and G-Spot Orgasm Cocktail
2. Top 10 Tips To Give Women An Orgasm
3. How To Give Your Woman The Kind of Orgasm SHE Wants
4. Is Your Woman Faking Her Orgasms?
5. Why Men Fail Miserably at Giving Their Women Orgasms - Even After Applying the Right Techniques

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Cuckold question: I like watching my wife get banged by a well endowed man. I love watching her climax in ways she doesn’t with me. Is this TOO weird?

–John, IN

Who Gets To Determine What Is Normal?

First of all, what is considered “normal” in this society? There are so many varieties of people with different cultures and different backgrounds who all do things a little bit differently that it’s practically impossible for anyone to determine a baseline of what is considered “normal” or “abnormal.” With that said, people might think your fantasy is weird if you share it with them, but what about those guys who like wearing women’s underwear - do you think that’s weird? Everyone’s own fantasy or fetish isn’t considered strange to them, but other people’s fantasies are labeled “weird” or “abnormal.” It’s all subjective, so worry less about what is “normal” and what isn’t and focus more on how to get what you and your partner both want in a sexually healthy relationship.

Confidence In Your Sexuality And Masculinity

If you enjoy watching your wife have sex with another man and are genuinely cool with it, you deserve some kudos! While involving other women with their wife in a 2-girl, 1 guy threesome is a typical man’s fantasy, the tables often get turned when a woman suggests bringing another man into the equation. Most men are too self conscious, too jealous and too insecure with themselves to really enjoy watching their partner be with another person sexually. If you’re not bothered by watching your wife become sexually intimate with another man and truly enjoy watching her be pleasured in this way, it speaks volumes about your confidence in yourself and your masculinity.

Have Fun!

The best way to judge if your sexual fantasy or fetish is “crossing” the line is to ask yourself the basic question - does it involve only consenting adults? Is everyone comfortable with what is going on? If so, have fun! As long as you and everyone involved can legally consent to sexual activity and no one is being harmed or doing something they’re uncomfortable doing, there is absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying your sexual fetish or fantasy. Make sure your relationship with your partner stays strong and healthy, and communicate with them regularly about what you like, what she likes and what the third person likes during sex. If any hard feelings come up, talk to your partner about them. If you have any suggestions about what would turn you on more, or if your partner has any suggestions about what would turn them on more, it’s important to keep an open line of communication going when it comes to your sex life. The biggest reason that threesome fantasies crumble is that partners have a breakdown in communication - enjoy yourself and talk to your partner often for a healthy and happy sex life!

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So why not aim for higher sexual heights with a ‘blended orgasm’?

What’s a Blended Orgasm?

As the name suggests, a blended orgasm is one where you climax via your clitoris (c-spot) AND Grafenberg spot (g-spot). As these pleasure zones are located in different places, the orgasm that you feel from one largely differs from the other. As a result, if you can stimulate both and climax from both simultaneously, then you can say you’ve hit the mother load of climaxes!

The Blended O… Solo

Before you run off to tell your man that you want a blended orgasm, take some time to figure out how to do this first on your own. This way, you can guide him better and can remove any possible awkwardness or frustration later together in bed.

The best way to try this is to close the curtains (or dim the lights), play some soft music, and then lie down. When you feel relaxed, start to stimulate your clitoris. No rush, just take your time.

When you’re finally wet and really aroused, leave off your c-spot for a while and go seek your g-spot. Insert your index finger inside and try to feel alongside the front wall of your vagina for a slightly rough and engorged nub. In general, you g-spot should feel like the upper side of your mouth. Don’t worry; when you’re close the g-spot you will definitely feel it because waves of arousal will hit you.

Note that as you stimulate your g-spot, you may feel this sudden urge urinate. Oftentimes, this is when things go wrong because women, thinking that they’ll embarrass themselves by peeing, will start to tense up and demand for the stimulation to stop. On the contrary, just keep on going and this feeling will soon come to pass.

Now as you feel yourself nearing your g-spot climax, use your other hand (or if your fingers are long enough and you can angle your hand properly, use the thumb on the same hand you’re suing to stimulate your g-spot) to go back and titillate your clitoris.

All I can say at this point is get ready for tremendous tremors to rock your body!

The Blended O… In Tandem

Now that you know how to bring yourself to a combi-orgasm, it’s time to bring your lover into the equation.

Lie down as comfortably as you can on the bed and ask your men to prop your hips with a small pillow. (This is to elevate your groin.) To warm you - and him - up, ask for some oral loving.

When you’re all hot and wet, tell him now’s the time to enter. As he thrusts, his penis should hit the gspot (thanks to your slightly elevated position). If this is not the case, then tilt your hips higher. If it helps, tell him to ‘drag’ you to the edge of the bed so that he’s standing as he thrusts. Continue until you’re just about to burst from a g-spot climax.

When you feel this is the case, then either ask him to finger your clitoris or do it yourself. (Nice visuals for him!)

AGAIN… all I can say at this point is get ready for tremendous tremors to rock your body!

Sex Positions for More Blended Oomph

Now that you guys have the Blended O basics covered, it’s time to experiment with new positions!

Try doggy-style. When you get on all fours, your behind is naturally slightly tilted already. As such, his penis is correctly angled to hit your g-spot like a marked bull’s eye! For the Blended O to occur, simply reach down and fondle your clitoris or better yet ask him to do it!

Try reverse woman-on-top. Women just love the woman-on-top position because we get to control the depth, speed, and even the roughness of intercourse. Well here’s another reason to love this position, it’s great for c-spot and g-spot stimulation especially when you do reverse woman-on-top (i.e., when you stride him the other way and you’re facing his feet).

As you ride his pole, reach down and make sure your c-spot does not feel neglected. Contract and relax your internal muscles to ensure increased friction between your genitals. Plus, it’s a nice treat for his penis!

And for the third time… all I can say at this point is get ready for tremendous tremors to rock your body!

Take just a minute to check out ‘Faster Female Orgasm’: “How To Reach Orgasm During Intercourse In Just 5 Minutes (Or Less)”

Related articles:

1. How To Give Your Woman The Kind of Orgasm SHE Wants
2. Targeting Her Pleasure Buttons: How To Finger A Woman’s G-Spot
3. Top 10 Tips To Give Women An Orgasm
4. Send Her To A Cloud Of Pleasure: How To Hit The G-Spot During Sex
5. Women: How To Have More Orgasms

 Dear Dan and Jennifer,

 

I’m very comfortable with my sexuality and a little on the BDSM side… I’ve been this way for years. My fiance and I have done a few things, but I want to try even more - costumes, props, etc. I don’t think he knows how dark my sexual side can be. How can I bring it up to him without scaring him?

 

–Desiree, MO

Click here to view the embedded video.

Let Your Partner Go First

Ask your partner what turns them on. This is not the time for a “sit down” talk, rather, you want to ask him in a very nonchalant sort of way. Bring it up if you’re watching a romantic movie with a hot sex scene, or even if you’re watching pornography together. If you’re visiting the mall, pop into the lingerie store or even the novelty stores that carry some sex toys. Asking your partner what turns them on opens them up to their own fantasies and gets their minds going.

Introduce Yourself Slowly

Don’t break into your fetish by surprising your partner with a leash and collar while wearing a full black leather outfit. You might scare them off! Try incorporating light BDSM into your foreplay and sexual routine, such as using a feather duster or even a light whip. Try purchasing some racier lingerie, or sexy shoes that reflect what turns you on. You can even suggest roleplaying light BDSM roles, such as light submission or light dominance. You might find that your partner really likes this type of sex play and begins to get more into it! If this happens, just ease into your fetish or fantasy slowly, until you’re really sharing with your partner what you like and what turns you on.

Try A Fantasy Box

A “Fantasy Box” is something you and your partner can try if you’re really shy about sharing your fantasies with your partner or your partner is really shy about sharing their fantasies with you. Write down your fantasies on a scrap piece of paper and put it in the box. Have your partner do the same. Make a “rule” that once a week, a fantasy is pulled out of the box and is enacted. If some fantasies require planning, give you and your partner enough time to purchase costumes, etc. This can even be something fun that you do together that can bring you and your partner closer! Decorate the fantasy box with things you both find sexy to make it even more fun.

No matter what, your sex life should be enjoyable and fulfilled, no matter what fetish or fantasy you like. You might be surprised – your fetish or fantasy probably isn’t as uncommon as you think it is! If your partner is freaked out by your fetish, whether it’s BDSM or something else, and you can’t work past it, consider that they might not be the partner for you. Remember – there’s someone out there for everyone!

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4. BDSM 101 - Moving Beyond Plain Vanilla Sex
5. Is It Normal For a Virgin to Be Into BDSM? (Video)

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

 

My girlfriend gives me blow jobs, hand jobs, etc. Every time we play, this white sticky stuff come out, and then after a few minutes cum comes out - what is all this stuff coming out of me?

 

–Jason, TX

Sperm, Semen and Precum

Lots of girls want to know – what’s the skinny on sperm, semen and precum? What are they?

Precum – The clear, thinnish and somewhat sticky liquid that comes out of the head of the penis in small amounts during penile stimulation before he actually ejaculates. Precum can and does contain live sperm, although in significantly smaller amounts than actual semen.

Semen – The whitish, thicker fluid that comes out of the head of the penis during ejaculation that contains millions of sperm.

 Sperm – Organisms carried within semen and precum that join with a woman’s egg to conceive a child.

 Which Of These Can Get A Girl Pregnant?

In short – all of them! Precum and semen both contain sperm. Having unprotected sex without a condom, even before the man ejaculates, can get a woman pregnant. It is better to treat a penis like a loaded gun. Many women believe that allowing a man to have intercourse with her without a condom is safe, as long as the guy pulls his penis out of her vagina before he ejaculates, and ejaculates away from her vagina. While this is safer than allowing your partner to actually ejaculate inside you, it is not a way to protect against pregnancy. Sperm can travel out of the penis pretty much at any time – allowing a condomless penis to get within the vicinity of your vagina puts you at a definite risk of getting pregnant.

Don’t chance it! Even allowing your partner to rub his penis on the outside of your vagina without a condom can transmit sperm from the penis to the vagina and there’s a reason that sperm are called “little swimmers.” They travel! For the safest type of sex, use a condom to prevent pregnancy. You can also discuss with your doctor other methods of birth control that can be used in conjunction with a condom for added protection, or in lieu of a condom if your with an STD free partner and in a completely faithful, monogamous relationship.

Which Of These Can Transmit A Sexually Transmitted Disease?

In short – all of them! Again, treat a condomless penis like a loaded gun, even more so if you’re unsure if your partner has a sexually transmitted disease. To clarify, unless you have a piece of paper in your hand that says your partner has tested negative for STD’s and you’re 110% positive your partner has not had any type of sexual contact with anyone else since the test was taken, you’re unsure of whether your partner has an STD. Protect yourself. Both precum and semen can carry the HIV and AIDS virus, as well as other sexually transmitted diseases. It is important to be even more vigilant if you’re concerned about STD’s, however, because you don’t just have to worry about any fluids from your partner’s penis coming into contact with your vagina, you also have to worry about these fluids possibly coming into contact with your mouth or any open sores or cuts on your body.

For example, if you knicked yourself shaving and your partner rubs his penis up your leg without a condom, you can possibly contract an STD that way. It’s rare – yes. But possible. Be safe and get STD tested, suggest that your partner get STD tested, stay in a monogamous, faithful relationship whenever possible, and use condoms during anal sex, oral sex and vaginal intercourse any time you’re unsure. Always treat your partner’s penis as though it can get you pregnant or give you an STD because in truth – it can! That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy sex. Just be safe and smart about it!

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Dear Dan and Jennifer,

 

I lost my virginity over a year ago, but every time we have sex it feels like losing my virginity all over again. Should it still be hurting? Is this normal?

 

–Danielle, PA

Click here to view the embedded video.

Why Does It Hurt?

Sex can hurt for a variety of reasons. Some of them are medical, others are not. Let’s take a quick look at the medical issues that can cause sex to become painful and stay that way with no relief. There are many sexually transmitted diseases and vaginal infections that can cause sex to be painful. Chlamydia and Gonorrhea are among the many STD’s that can cause vaginal discharge, odor and painful sex for a woman.

Untreated STD’s will continue causing these symptoms and they may become worse or even unbearable. Common vaginal infections, such as yeast or bacterial infections, can cause discomfort during sex with or without other symptoms. If sex has become painful for you, it is important to see your medical doctor for an exam to rule out any medical issues or infections that could be causing your discomfort. Find a doctor you are comfortable with, and don’t worry – doctors see it all! You should feel comfortable enough with your doctor to discuss your sexual habits and the reasons you might be feeling sexual discomfort – if you’re not, it’s time to find a new doctor.

Common Issues

Common issues for uncomfortable or painful sex go beyond medical issues. There are a few reasons beyond your control – and some that are within your control – that could be responsible for sex becoming and staying painful. First, your partner may be too large for you. Whether your partner is exceptionally large or not, he may be too large for your anatomy. Everyone is made differently and although vaginas are extremely accomodating, your partner’s hardware may just not match yours in a way that is comfortable for you. You also may be prone to vaginal dryness. This isn’t necessarily a medical issue, however, it can cause plenty of discomfort during sex.

What To Do

Other than seeing a medical doctor to rule out any physical issues for painful sex, you can make sure you have lots of foreplay before sex and are very, very relaxed and aroused. This will help you to make soothing vaginal secretions that will aid any vaginal dryness, as well as help your vagina to better accommodate a larger penis, if that is the case. You can also use a good, water based lubricant during sex, and try different positions that allow for less penetration if you feel that your partner may be too large for you.

No matter what, sex shouldn’t be painful, or especially continue to be painful. It should be pleasurable! Talk to your doctor to see what you can do to make sex more enjoyable for both you and your partner. Your doctor may recommend a sex therapist, after ruling out any medical conditions responsible, to better help you and your partner to find ways to make sex more enjoyable and comfortable for you.

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Dear Dan and Jennifer,

 

I have a fetish for cross dressing. I like dressing up in sexy lingerie, but I don’t go out in public or anything. Are the any women out there who are open enough to consider this a normal part of a healthy sex life? I also like the idea of dressing up as a French maid and submitting myself to the lady of the manner….

 

–Jonathan, FL

Click here to view the embedded video.

Some Like It, Some Don’t

Many women aren’t going to be turned on by men who enjoy cross dressing – it’s just fact. While some women don’t mind it, some are going to be turned off by it. That doesn’t mean you have to give up what you enjoy though! There are women who enjoy cross dressing themselves, and who enjoy being with men who like to cross dress. There’s someone for everyone, no matter what your fetish or fantasy is. You just have to find them!

Where To Look

Okay, so popping over to the bookstore might help you meet a nice girl, it’s not likely to be the best place to meet someone who either won’t mind your cross dressing or someone who might even share your fetish with you. There are, however, lots of good places online to meet people who share your interests or similar interests to yours! Browse through online dating websites or online fetish websites where you can specify your interest in cross dressing before you even meet someone. It’s refreshing to know right off the bat that someone who shows interest in you through these websites know that you enjoy cross dressing and either like it or don’t have a problem with it.

How To Tell Someone Who Doesn’t Know

What if you’re already involved with someone or are dating someone who doesn’t know that you like to cross dress but you would like to share this fetish with them? This can be a tricky situation, but it’s definitely not an impossible one. Don’t have a “sit down” talk with them. This can be uncomfortable and will put your partner on the spot, and it can be especially awkward if they don’t react to your cross dressing in the way you expected. Try introducing it slowly. Buy a silky robe and see if your partner likes the feel of it on you. Try wearing her panties to bed and see what she thinks – if she doesn’t like it, you can always play it off as having fun. If she does, visit a lingerie shop with her, and pick out fun, sexy lingerie for both of you. Sharing your cross dressing with her slowly can help warm her up to the idea, and then you can begin to share your fantasies with her!

No matter what your fetish or fantasy is, it’s important to have someone you can share it with. Don’t judge other people and don’t let them judge you – to each his own and there’s always someone out there for everybody!

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