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Where is this paper on economists being wrong I'm remembering?

DyRE — Thu, 23 May 2013 05:04:03 GMT

Some time ago, I came across a paper analyzing the predictions or theories of a number of economists relating to the recent economic troubles. The paper was very detailed (I didn't finish it) but the gist was that every single theory or prediction analyzed was wrong. Anyone know what I'm talking about and where I might find it?

Here's some details I hope I'm not misremembering:
- I thought I found it on the blue but a lengthy perusal of the economics tag hasn't yielded fruitful results, nor have my Google searches (economists being wrong is apparently a popular topic).
- I think I came across it within the past couple years. More than a few months ago at least.
- I want to say the number of economists whose ideas were analyzed was around 40, or at least under 100, but I might be wholly wrong on this one.
- There was a bit at the start of the paper that gives the conclusion (they're all wrong). The bulk of the paper was dedicated to individual analyses and it's quite lengthy.

New News Feed Release Date?

rmttws — Thu, 23 May 2013 04:30:33 GMT

I saw that Facebook has created an updated version of the News Feed (see it at Facebook.com/newsfeed) that has larger pictures and less text. I really liked it, so I signed up for the waiting list. A month has passed and still no sign of the new design. Anyone know when the public release will be?

Is my writing style overly complicated?

Unhyper — Thu, 23 May 2013 04:28:56 GMT

I learned English as a second language (native is Finnish). The emphasis in school was on vocabulary and very basic grammar; we did not to my recollection deal with stuff like passive voice etc. So in terms of writing in English, much of my "voice" has developed simply from what sounds right inside my head. However, I've been told that the way I write is overly complicated. Is this so?

I never try to complicate my writing with unnecessary stylistic choices or fancy words. I believe that anything that makes it more difficult for my point to get across is detrimental to the writing. Yet, at the same time, I don't think one's writing should simply cater to the lowest intellectual denominator.

Anyway, occasionally when I let others read what I write, they suggest I simplify things. It's not necessarily bad advice, but it has made me a bit concerned over the quality of my command of the language. The trouble is, my natural way of constructing sentences is, I suppose, unnecessarily verbose - yet it is most natural for me. For instance, I was responding to something on Facebook and quipped the following: "By default, I just assume that any insect the nutritional habits of which I am not aware of, is one that sucks blood."

A friend of mine pointed out that I could have just said something like, "If I don't know what an insect eats, I assume it sucks blood." Okay, fair enough.

My question is, would that be better writing, grammatically? Phonetically? Is it simply easier to understand? A sentence like that just sounds so... I don't know. Inflexible? Rough?

LaLa to Swaptree to Swap to...What?

softlord — Thu, 23 May 2013 03:31:21 GMT

Once upon a time, there was a site called LaLa.com which offered peer-to-peer CD trading services. You listed the CDs you had, the ones you wanted, and it paired up people who had what you wanted and wanted what you have. And all was right with the world. (can you see there this is heading?)

Then Apple bought LaLa and swiftly shut it down, but not before they allowed people to migrate their want and have lists to a competitor called SwapTree, which offered the same service, but for movies, games and books too (hooray!).

A few years later, Swaptree became Swap.Com, got bought out by some scandinavians, and closed the trading portion of their site with no warning to the users. (boo!)

What I'm looking for is a replacement for the above functionality, focused mostly on CDs (ten years in the music biz = hundreds of CDs i'm not fond of), with an active enough userbase that it wouldn't be a total waste of my time to re-list.

I've found bookmooch.com for books, though all i've gotten is requests for my books rather than offers for the books I'm looking for.

Please hope me!

Why Castor Beans?

Anonymous — Thu, 23 May 2013 02:50:28 GMT

Someone in a neighborhood near mine is growing Castor Bean plants in their front yard. I had always thought of Castor Beans as a waste plant that grew up, unwanted, in disturbed areas. Owing to its toxic nature I thought it a strange choice for a carefully planted yard. Are castor beans more common in landscaping than I thought?

I pass this house often on my walks and I wondered why anyone would purposely grow castor beans in their yard. I came home and Googled Castor Beans. I discovered that there are many medicinal uses and Castor Beans are even used in some places to raise silkworms. So now I know that there may be any number of reasons someone would choose to grow this plant, but here is what made me think it seems odd. First, the plants were initially planted in the thin strip of yard between the side walk and the street, they grew big quickly and caused passerby on the sidewalk to brush past them, sometimes breaking or bending the leaves. The plant did not fit the space well and when winter came, the plants all died. This spring new Castor Bean plants have been planted in the exact same place and now more of the plants have been planted in other parts of the yard. These are individual plants, obviously transplanted into specific places, not a volunteer plant , not some seed that blew in and took root. Its neither here nor there, but Castor Beans are not naturally occurring in our area and they do not seem to do well, with out a great deal of care, which these plants obviously get. Someone puts a great deal of effort into these plants, they are being grown for some purpose. So I wonder, why would someone choose to put a toxic plant like the castor Bean in their yard? Do any of you know people that grow these plants on purpose? Are there medicinal or food usages that are common in other countries or in other parts of the US? Any gardeners out there, have you ever grown this plant, what reasons did you choose it?

The reason I ask this anonymously, is that my first reaction was to wonder if maybe someone isn't using the beans to make Ricin. I want to make absolutely clear that I have NO EVIDENCE that this is the case, and I AM NOT ABOUT to go around accusing anyone of anything. I'd really just like to quell these little twinges of worry. I had a very strong gut reaction when I put Castor Bean plants together with Ricin, and although my intellect knows that worrying is most likely silly, my gut would like some reassurance.

Breathing new life into an old website, input on new name and content

christopherious — Thu, 23 May 2013 02:10:14 GMT

I created an online, open source academic journal website several years ago and it may be near the end of its first life. I'd love to get feedback on what folks here think might work best. I want to reinvent it and breathe new life into old content. Help me, MetaFilter, rebuild something that doesn't have to die into something new and beautiful!

I created this website several years ago

Journal of Men, Masculinities and Spirituality (JMMS) is an online, scholarly, peer-reviewed, interdisciplinary journal. JMMS is published twice a year with provision for other special editions. JMMS seeks to be as inclusive as possible in its area of inquiry. Papers address the full spectrum of masculinities and sexualities, particularly those which are seldom heard. Similarly, JMMS addresses not only monotheistic religions and spiritualities but also Eastern, indigenous, new religious movements and other spiritualities which resist categorization. JMMS papers address historical and contemporary phenomena as well as speculative essays about future spiritualities. The academic interests of the editorial board reflect these diverse positions.

The site has done pretty well, but submission rates have dropped this past year. The executive editor is now thinking considering pulling the plug (we had a good run, we both agreed), but I talked him into letting me do something with the content. I'd love to get feedback on what folks here think might work best, or reasons why this might not be worthwhile.

The changes I'm considering include a fresh, new theme (less minimalist), a new website name and domain name, and some new content areas. Perhaps even a public forum and public blogs.

Help me breathe new life into something that doesn't have to die!

Needing recommendation for premarital counseling

4ster — Thu, 23 May 2013 01:55:35 GMT

In October, I am officiating at wedding for a man and woman in Virginia. However, they are living in the financial district of New York (the zip is 10004), and I've (sadly) never been to New York. Could you suggest someone in that area who could provide premarital counseling for them?

The counseling can be secular or religious. Either is fine. They are just looking for something basic.

Thank you for your help.

Offline ipad games

bq — Thu, 23 May 2013 00:37:15 GMT

What are some good games that I can play while offline? I've seen this question but I am looking specifically for games. I know I can download books and stuff. I want to PLAY! On an airplane. Without paying for Internet. Help me out.

Engagement didn't work out - but she's still on the mortgage

Anonymous — Thu, 23 May 2013 00:28:05 GMT

So I got engaged and bought a house with my fiancee. We lived together for a couple of years but it did not go well and she moved out. So I'd like to keep the house but do that I'll need to get her off the mortgage and off the deed.

The same week that she moved out I lost my government contractor job. Thanks to the (fear of) sequester I sat at home unemployed for 7 months. Now I'm back at work but because of the sequester I took a $35000 pay cut. So I'm working but my income has been cut by a third.

Right now I am renting out two of the rooms to help make ends meet. It's a nice house in a good location near public transit so I get decent rent for it. I figure the only way to get her off the mortgage is to refinance. I'm not sure if I can do that on my current income. I'm struggling a bit to keep the payments up as it is.

She figures her interest in the house is about $15000. So she has told me if I can pay off that much of it to her then she thinks that it's fair. At first we were talking about monthly payments but now she's telling me she would like to get that in a lump sum. I should add that she has rather expensive tastes, is not good with money, and is currently broke.

To be frank I don't know if I can do much of anything - besides selling the place, at my current income. However I do think at some point Congress will get off their ass, work something out, and I can get another position closer to my old salary.

So I'm looking for some pointers because to be quite frank I'm not even sure where to start.

I don't understand the question, and I won't respond to it.

burnfirewalls — Wed, 22 May 2013 23:17:21 GMT

What are the Netflix engineers currently doing to make sure that this weekend's release of Arrested Development Season 4 will go off without a hitch?

When Simcity 5 launched in March 2013, the network connection required to play caused scores of problems, not the least of which were server outages. This is a recent example of many high-profile game launches that received mass negative backlash based around server availability and performance.

With the hype and excitement and sheer data required for Netflix to stream the 4th season of Arrested Development into the devices of thousands of fans this weekend, what preparation are they likely doing to make it a success and avoid the pitfalls of so many game launches?

Home Sales Party- How do I end this sales pitch?

karyotypical — Wed, 22 May 2013 23:11:29 GMT

My friend will not stop pestering me to invite my friends to her home sales party. How do I navigate this situation without damaging our friendship or leaving one of us feeling bitter?

I am sure other people have been in this situation, and I could use some advice. One of my close friends just got involved in home sales parties (along the lines of Mary Kay). It seems like a good fit for her, as she has a strong personality, a young daughter, and is in need of some extra cash. Personally, I am fine attending one of her parties and buying some overpriced lotion. However, in order to host more parties, she is asking all of her friends to bring their friends over for a "girls night out."

My friends are mostly graduate students and I would never want to put them in a position where they felt guilted into buying (even if money wasn't an issue). After she didn't get the hint when I said I wasn't comfortable setting a party date, I then told my friend less-subtly that none of my other friends were interested in the party/sale. She immediately responded about how "there is absolutely no obligation to buy anything" and I should re-ask them (also adding in that this would be a great opportunity for her to meet and relax with my friends). She has also contacted me several times trying to get me to choose a date and has put this on me, saying "I really need your help in getting my business started. I know you'll help out because you've always been such a good friend to me." I keep saying no, but she isn't having it. She has calculated that at the rate she has been going, she "will be making about $90,000 a year" and is now making plans to quit her job. She has been doing this for less than a month and is typically very level-headed, so I'm really surprised at how indoctrinated she seems.

I'm getting together with my friend this weekend, and she just wrote to me about how we can use some of that time to plan a date for all of my friends to come over. I thought the "none of my friends are interested" spiel would be enough, but clearly it isn't. I'm fairly non-confrontational, so I could really use some advice on what to do when she keeps bringing this up. I really don't want to lose a decade-long friendship over this, but I am at a loss. How do I get my friend to drop this? Advice or even a script would be very much appreciated!

Help me create the perfect Appalachian playlist

Grandysaur — Wed, 22 May 2013 23:06:31 GMT

I'm looking for songs that are in love with Appalachia, mention places, rivers, Dogwood flowers, etc and are full of that Blue Ridge heartache. Blue grass, country, folk and that ilk. I'm driving along the blue ridge parkway, and want a killer soundtrack. I already have the Sweetback Sister's Virginia is for Lovers, Paradise by John Prine, Tom Wait's Oh Shenandoah and of course, Wagon Wheel, on repeat on my playlist. What am I missing?

What's the best easy, web based wiki/collective note software out there?

GilloD — Wed, 22 May 2013 23:03:20 GMT

Here's what I need to do: Keep a lot of disparate bits of info in one place. There will be never more than 15 users. I'd like to use it software as service, I don't want to have to worry about hosting it. Bonus points for being mobile friendly and/or having an app. We'd like to be able to jam images and videos in there, too. It doesn't have to be a Wiki, a helpful Evernote plugin or something would be a-okay, also. Just looking for a recommendation!

Does the dot suffix of a website's name matter?

letstrythis — Wed, 22 May 2013 23:01:13 GMT

How important is having a .com suffix to the perceived legitimacy of a website? How does it affect traffic/success, etc? Does holding onto .com as the ideal make sense in this world of domain squatters? Can we make a list of good and bad choices?

Need advice for a corporate LAN/port/network security issue.

JPowers — Wed, 22 May 2013 22:52:57 GMT

I have a corporate LAN/port/network security issue that I'm looking for some advice on.

Let's say you have an application server (AppServer) which has a good bit of sensitive data living directly on its harddrive.

Let's also say AppServer lives within a LAN (i.e., it is not in a DMZ).

Now let's imagine that a bunch of remote users (i.e., users who are not living within the same LAN) need to connect, using a thick application client, to AppServer.

Finally, let's say that, because of the cost of setting up a VPN server, a decision is made to just universally open up port 443 through the LAN, so that all of these remote users can talk directly to AppServer (via SSL) from their thick application client.

In this situation, what are the security risks of opening up port 443 like this? Also, is this reasonably advisable?

Dealing with the after effects of a sudden seizure

kanata — Wed, 22 May 2013 22:42:35 GMT

I had a seizure on Monday. Is it normal for your emotions to be affected afterwards and what can I do to remain calm and not panic until the results of a CT scan come back?

Sitting at my computer on Monday I had a seizure that apparently lasted about three minutes and caused me to bite my tongue and wet myself. I've never had one before. I went to the ER and was sent home with everything in the clear. Today I had a CT scan and won't get the results until Friday afternoon.

Since the seizure I have found myself to be massively depressed. I suffer from depression normally but this seems different. I just feel a sense of hopelessness and being trapped in this life. I feel like I've been hit by an emotional truck. Is this normal? Is it common also to have nausea and a headache days later?

I also feel panic at the idea of a seizure. I've been staying off Google but people can't help but inform me of their friends who had a seizure and it was a stroke and then they died a horrible death, etc. Or, worse in a weird way, people tell me it is nothing and I'm upset for nothing. I feel alternatively dismissed and panic.

What can I do to not panic and give into the hopelessness until my doctor's appointment? I have a therapist and have talked to him but just can't seem to distract myself from the constant worry.

Is it okay to plant pepper seeds from China?

serathen — Wed, 22 May 2013 22:37:52 GMT

A friend of mine recently brought back a bag of crushed red pepper from her home city in China. I had the idea of trying to plant some of the seeds in my plot at a local community garden and seeing if they'd grow. My concern is whether this would be safe and legal to do.

These are so-called "facing-heaven chiles", which are specific to Sichuanese cuisine and hard to find in any form in the U.S. She brought back the crushed kind, because friends had had problems with customs trying to bring in whole dried peppers. I don't want to be responsible for importing some exotic pepper virus to North America. This is in Boston, so I'm not close to any commercial farms (and also may be too late in the season to try this anyway; not sure about that either).

Resume: How to say - "Can work with you on getting work visa" (in Fiji)

DaftMythic — Wed, 22 May 2013 22:05:48 GMT

How do I express to potential employers in Fiji , "YES, I am American, YES I only have a Visitor Visa right now... but I have the resources to do whatever hoops and get the Work Visa, just tell me what is best for you"?

I am in Fiji. I need a job to stay here with my Fiancee (who for other reasons I should not legally marry until we are both in the USA). I am currently under Visitor Visa until August.

I am applying for jobs and from what I understand I would technically need to leave the country and then apply for work visa and then re-enter*. I am cool with that. Or maybe the company has another procedure they want me to use (or they have a friend somewhere in the government who can work some magic). I am cool with that too.

I even have an Australian Work and Holiday Visa in the bag so I can go back and forth between Fiji and Australia as needed.

How do I put that in a simple form on my resume that:
1) Does not make them automatically reject me because I am only a Visitor Visa
2) But that lets them know I am only interested in the job if they can get me a Work Visa
3) And I am willing to do whatever it takes to achieve #2

Thanks!

* Referencing This Fiji Embassy Document: Which says "anyone intending to apply for a temporary, short or long term work permit should do so from outside Fiji;"

Japan aficionados: help me plan my trip!

idlethink — Wed, 22 May 2013 22:03:55 GMT

I would like to see Tokyo, Kyoto, Miyajima, Hiroshima and Naoshima in the space of 10 days. What should I see? Is this possible? and if not, all advice welcome! Details after the jump.

I'm planning a ten-day trip to Japan in June, part of which will be with family (one member of which is very familiar with Japan, so I am less concerned about those parts of the trip) and the rest on my own. I am flying into Kansei (Osaka), and from then will have a 7-day JR pass which will expire on the 20th, by which time I plan to be in Tokyo.

14-17 June: Kyoto with family
17-18 June: Solo - Miyajima
18-19 June: Solo - Hiroshima
19/20-24 June: Tokyo with family

My question is in two parts.

1) The question of the extra day

I potentially have one more night solo (19-20 June) before I head back up to Tokyo to spend the rest of the vacation with family. I'd love some advice regarding this extra day. I am extremely interested in seeing Naoshima/Teshima, but am having trouble deciding if that's logistically feasible. Options presently:

(A) Just spend another night in Hiroshima and take it easy
(B) Train up to Naoshima and Teshima, staying overnight on one of those islands
(C) See Naoshima, then stay overnight in a relatively nearby city (Okoyama? Kobe? Osaka?)
(D) Skip Naoshima entirely and spend the second night in a major city between Hiroshima and Tokyo, which would make getting back to Tokyo on the 20th easier

If (A), is two nights in Hiroshima too much? If not, I would love recommendations. Obviously, I am going to spend a good deal of time in the Peace Museum.

If (B) or (C), am I severely underestimating the amount of time it would take me to get from place to place? For example, if I left Hiroshima early on the 19th, by what time could I reasonably expect to actually be on Naoshima - and would there be enough time on the island before museums close or the ferry stops running? If (B), is it in fact worth staying the night? I have been told by many people that Naoshima is actually not quite even a day trip.

If (D), which city?

2) The question of what to see

I would love recommendations on anything I should see or do while in Japan, given where I'm going! My interests tend somewhat away from sightseeing as such (i.e. seeing for the sake of having seen), and more towards experiences unique to the place I'm visiting: seeing interesting exhibitions and museums (I am a historian), wandering around quirky & interesting places, people-watching, eating good food in interesting environments, watching interesting food or objects being made, visiting funky bookstores or shops, etc. I am not a huge shopper and not very much into souvenirs, but I'd happily buy edible things or crafted goods that are really unique to the place, if such things were available.

Any help would be enormously appreciated, and my apologies for the very long post. Thanks in advance!

Travelfilter: How to get the cheapest flight from Vancouver - Tokyo?

abbagoochie — Wed, 22 May 2013 22:02:04 GMT

I've wanted to go to Tokyo all my life, and have a few weeks off soon. I've been looking for flights and the cheapest I can find are $1450 all in... but I suspect if I the trip was broken up a bit by not flying there directly, it'd be a lot cheaper. Are there any resources you know of to help with this/have you done this before/do you know a good route that would shave off the $$$? Time isn't overly important as I have three weeks between jobs for exploring. But I don't want to be paying this off till next year. Help!

Desperately seeking heavyweight black v-neck t-shirts

holgate — Wed, 22 May 2013 21:31:50 GMT

My favourite t-shirts are on their last legs, and the place where I bought them (Principles for Men) no longer exists. They're black, v-neck, with side seams and vents, and very much designed as outerwear. The fabric is heavy, perhaps even a little heavier than Hanes Beefy or Fruit of the Loom Heavyweight (6.1oz) and most store/fancy-brand shirts use much thinner cloth. Any suggestions? US sources as a first option, but ones in the UK are useful as well.

Aged, Poor and Stubborn

Oriole Adams — Wed, 22 May 2013 21:00:35 GMT

How can an adult child help an elderly parent (age 80) who lives below the poverty level but is against/afraid of applying for assistance? (prepare for tl;dr details inside)

The backstory: My Dad retired in 1973 while in his early 40s because his plant closed and he had a "30 and out" union contract. Nevertheless, his monthly pension was $477 (after taxes), which was technically poverty level at that time, but Dad didn't think so. It was always someone else's fault - gas shouldn't cost 50 cents a gallon, there's no reason a loaf of bread should be X amount, etc etc. He was probably technically delusional or some other mental health diagnosis, but whatever. I started working at age 16 in an office (time release thing from high school) to earn money to help buy stuff Dad's pension wasn't supplying. I also lived at home long after the traditional age because Mom relied on my income for essentials and I couldn't afford to live on my own and pay her various bills.

I've long since married and moved out of the family home, but I still gave my Mom some $$ (no set amount) every few weeks when I visited to help her out, as did my brother. But within the past two years my employment/living situation has changed, as has my brother's, and we cannot afford to to give her as much as before. (She never outright asked for money, mind you, and was always reluctant to accept it [sometimes I had to slip it into her purse when she wasn't looking], but she always profusely thanked me for it and reciprocated in her own way.) Anyway, since my Dad died two years ago, her Social Security has been cut down, and she frequently mentions in emails that the heat/humidity are making her feel sick, but she won't run the air conditioning because that jacks up the electric bill to $200/month. Or she'll get a cash advance on her credit card to pay for new eyeglasses, car insurance, property taxes and other things that her monthly check won't cover, and then she frets about the interest.

Her income is less than $10,000 per year, so she certainly should qualify for one or more forms of government assistance (food stamps, etc). But she adamantly refuses every time I suggest it, for two reasons....first, she insists that it would require her to fill out forms with all sorts of personal information and the government will "get all in her business" (she *has* no business, nothing to hide, nothing untoward in her history, no hidden bank accounts, etc), and second, she sort of implies that it's "bad" or beneath her (for lack of a better term) to go on assistance. She'll comment to me "I was buying X at the grocery store yesterday, and the woman in front of me in line was using food stamps," as if it was a bad thing. But Mom forgoes a lot of basics while grocery shopping because she won't consider public assistance due to some sort of personal altruistic mindset known only to her. She also thinks that if she applies for "welfare" they will first make her sell her house (because it is paid for). (If she *were* to sell her house, she wouldn't get nearly what was originally paid for it....the neighborhood has "changed" in recent years, as they say....houses in her neighborhood that sold for $40,000 in 1995 are going for $20,000 or less today. Many neighbors are just posting "for sale" signs and leaving the property empty.) She keeps talking about "if I could only get a job...." except for her pancreatitis that frequently causes her debilitating pain and prevents her from leaving the house... (not to mention most employers unwilling to hire an octogenarian)...

The only plus point in her favor is Dad's UAW Blue Cross contract is very good as far as health insurance goes, so at least major medical/hospital costs/prescriptions aren't an issue. But other than that, she is struggling and I want to help her somehow. If I convince her to fill out applications for, say, food stamps and SSDI, will a caseworker actually come to her home? Can all of that be done via mail/email? From a cursory look online, it seems that the only utility bill assistance available in Michigan is for heating, not cooling. Any other ideas as to what services are available to Mom? And can I truthfully tell her that applying for same won't majorly invade her privacy or have strangers pop in unannounced to inspect her house/living conditions?

5-day gap between apartment leases

RUPure — Wed, 22 May 2013 20:38:05 GMT

My current lease ends on June 30, but my new lease does not begin until July 5. We've talked with both current and new landlords, but neither are able to help us out by allowing us to stay late/move in early. What are some creative solutions to this problem?

I'm sure this is a common problem, but I will have a 5 day gap between my current lease and my new lease. If I go the traditional route, I have to pay for movers twice, and for storage. These seems like I will be spending a lot of money for only 5 days, so I'm hoping to figure out another solution. I've looked into Pods and ABF Relocubes because I've used them in the past, but they are not allowed in the city of Chicago, where I live. I'm not too concerned about where I will stay because I can stay with family or friends, but I do have a decent amount of furniture and will have many boxes, so my stuff cannot come with me to crash with friends/family.

Any thoughts?

I know that this question addressed a similar situation, but it was only an overnight gap, and in NYC, whereas it will be 5 days for me, and in Chicago. I figure there might be different responses given these differences.

Thanks for your help!!

Passing out on a plane.

futureisunwritten — Wed, 22 May 2013 20:34:07 GMT

What would make someone pass out on a plane?

My dad is 68 years old and has hypothyroidism, ulcerative colitis, and an aortic aneurysm that is being monitored. However, he's pretty active, eats well, is not overweight, and doesn't smoke or drink. On Friday night, he flew to France from eastern Canada and passed out on the flight. He said all he remembers is waking up with the entire flight crew standing over him. My dad flies probably dozen times a year and this has never happened before. I told him to get his ass to a doctor but he said he'll wait until he gets home to see his GP.

Already Googled the hell out of this one and now I'm asking you fine folks. How common is this? Has it ever happened to you or someone you know? And was it ever indicative of a larger problem?

How Can I Be Notified of Aurora Sightings in NY Tristate Area?

Quisp Lover — Wed, 22 May 2013 20:06:44 GMT

Since we're in a period of increasing solar activity, I'm hoping for some hot aurora action in the NY Tristate area. But while there are countless aurora forecast/advisory services, I can't find one for this area.

There are a zillion places to go for info on solar activity, aurora forecasts and advisories, and even SMS heads-ups. If I lived in Alaska, I'd have all the info in the world. But I'll be damned if I can find a way to be notified of aurora activity if/when it occurs down here in the NY Tristate Area.

This makes sense, since it's such an extreme rarity. But OTOH, I certainly wouldn't want to miss something so extremely rare. There was aurora visible here once in the early 1970's, and I'm still angry at my parents for not waking me up!

Ideally, I'd find a way to receive sighting reports via email or SMS. But I'd settle for a forecast web page silly enough to stay current re: this (unlikely) area.

Have Users Change a Running Python Script's Variables over the Web?

millerizer — Wed, 22 May 2013 19:51:43 GMT

I'm writing a simple simulator with python and I would like to be able to have my users log in to the simulator over the internet and change their own set of variables.

I know next-to-nothing on web programming and I'm not to concerned about security, the simulation will be on it's own dedicated machine.

What to do with this body?

Thorzdad — Wed, 22 May 2013 19:41:51 GMT

Let's say you drop-in to visit an older loved one, and find them dead...

Sorry to be such a downer, but this is a scenario I could easily find myself in, and I am clueless as to how to proceed.

What should you do upon discovering a loved one who has passed away. Let's assume no foul play. Natural causes.

Do you call the cops? Call an ambulance? Just call 911 and let them decide who to send?
Seems to me, taking the body to a hospital would be silly (as well as expensive) because, well, they're dead. But, the body has to go somewhere.

Do you immediately start cold-calling funeral homes and have them handle whatever has to happen?

Obviously, I have absolutely no experience in these matters, but I can see it happening in the near future, and I can't find the chapter covering this in my Human Bean Handbook.

Who are today's innovative, socially involved, networking Freemasons?

HopStopDon'tShop — Wed, 22 May 2013 19:40:04 GMT

Is there an international group of innovative, charitably-minded people that get together and share ideas (physically) in the way that the Freemasons, Rotary and Lions Clubs all do? But without the ceremony, pomp and irrelevance (of some of these associations).

I'm looking to meet and learn with locals that are passionate about their society, successful, enthusiastic and all of that good stuff. However, the majority of the institutions that I am aware of are, frankly, a bit stodgy and very male (even if they are, at this point in time, open to everyone). I would love to join a group that is dedicated to all of the usual good stuff but is truly dynamic, not bogged down by their own history and habits and so on...

I want something really out there pushing it... Like an ongoing TED conference or something I suppose. Any suggestions?

Does a map exist of USG Locality Pay Areas?

psoas — Wed, 22 May 2013 19:25:08 GMT

Either Google is playing dumb or I don't know what to search for, but I'm coming up with nothing. Where can I find (or easily populate) a map of the locality pay areas as defined by the U.S. Government? Bonus if they're somehow shaded on a scale reflecting the locality payment (% increase from "base salaries").

Please help me help my friend deal with his anger

Anonymous — Wed, 22 May 2013 19:23:18 GMT

My best friend in the world has serious anger issues. He throws tantrums, bellows and sometimes just insults me as a way to blow off steam. He's been seriously depressed for some years now, and therapy hasn't helped dramatically so far. I've tried to set some boundaries in terms of how he acts towards me, and his girlfriend is doing the same, but he says he doesn't know of any other ways to deal with how he's feeling. What resources can I refer him to?

I've been living with this guy for six years now, and that isn't going to change. He's always tended to unwind by telling me I'm annoying, my clothes are stupid etc. When I try to talk to him about it he says he likes and respects me, but that he has a massive build-up of negativity and frustration through the day, which he cannot express most of the time as it would get him fired, dumped etc. He throws tantrums around his girlfriend, who lives with us and whom I also consider a great friend, but mostly he does not insult her.

This weekend she decided she had had enough after he yelled at both of us in the street when we tried to change our travel route. We ended up taking a train without him, and meeting up with him later in the day; he was still fuming, and felt that she was showing a lack of compassion because she said she didn't want to be around him when he was that angry. I am supportive of her attempts to set some boundaries here, and after a long conversation I told him he needs to work on how he deals with emotion, and that I won't put up with the insults either.

Therapy has been mostly concentrated at making his life halfway tolerable, and hasn't really succeeded in that so far. He's currently midway through a 6 month break at his psychologist's suggestion, so he won't be seeing another therapist for at least 3 months. He had a bit of a traumatic childhood and arguably didn't learn many emotion management skills at all. I have been talking to him a bit about focusing on things other than whatever's immediately bothering him, but I feel a bit like I'm trying to explain calculus to a three-year-old. It doesn't help that he's so depressed it is difficult for him to envisage any sort of change for the better. However, I have mental health problems too, and I don't think it's good for me to be subjected to a constant barrage of abuse.

I want to point him towards some resources that guide people through how to process emotions in a non-destructive way. He is book-smart but emotionally he is thick as two short planks, so it would be a good idea if they were simple, but not oversimplified.

teenage vigilantes

changeling — Wed, 22 May 2013 18:04:57 GMT

I'm revising a young adult novel that includes legal & police (sub)plotlines and have some questions.

Hi all! I need some help with legal/police/court aspects of a young adult novel I've written. It's set in Southern California. Court stuff, etc., is in the background; the main plotline is how revenge events can stack up and spiral out of control, until the inciting incident (in this case, an unreported rape) is almost forgotten. But I want to make sure procedural stuff is correct.

In the book, a group of guys (ages 16 & 17) brutally beats up a guy (N, age 17) from another school, in vigilante retaliation for a rape. N ends up in the hospital for weeks. The guys are arrested, then released on bail a few days later to await a hearing.

A few weeks after the beating, an infection kills N.

1. What would happen to the guys, out on bail? Would they end up back in jail immediately? Would hearing timelines shift?
2. One of the guys & his family (which includes the rape victim) moves an hour away. They can still get to hearings, obviously. Would that be allowed?
3. Is this manslaughter or second-degree murder? Or what? What kind of punishment would the guys likely be facing?
4. What effect might the rape victim's testimony/reporting the rape have on the outcome?
5. Anything else I'm not thinking of, or got wrong?

Thanks so much!

Is going back to school really worth it?

PrettyKnitty — Wed, 22 May 2013 18:00:27 GMT

I am 28 years old and just completed my first semester of college, which I was unable to do when I was younger for a variety of reasons. Is this is a good idea? Much, much more detail inside.

I was raised in an extremely fundamentalist Christian household. Going to college, especially as a female person, was just not something you could do (or at least I was led to believe). I had no idea of the existence of student loans, for example. I thought people had to pay their entire tuition upfront. (I also thought that dinosaurs walked around with people, but I digress.....)

Over the years, I've worked a variety of (mostly retail) jobs, where I met other people and was exposed to some other facets of life. That, and meeting my husband was my first exposure to other ideas, and I came to realize the world wasn't such a scary place; I had some options!

Fast forward several years, and I was able to extricate myself from the terrible church situation. That was 2010. I wanted very badly to start college, as it was something I had always wanted to do. Unfortunately, at that time, I was employed as a nanny, and worked too late in the evening to allow me to make it to classes at the local community college. My husband and I were barely scraping by, both working low paying jobs.

In 2012, after a variety of factors, we were forced to move back in with my parents, as my husband has not been able to find full time employment, and his student loan (a private loan) was pretty oppressive on top of our other expenses. Finally, I can work less hours, although I still have to work since we have a car payment, student loan debt, and my father wants a fairly significant rent.

So, with that background in mind, I am trying to figure out if I am on a good path. I am attempting to study towards my BS in Computer Engineering, since I am good at math, and have enjoyed playing with python in my spare time. The community college I attend has a dual enrolment with a state school, so all credits earned there will go toward completing my degree.

I guess my real question is, is this a good idea? I am fairly isolated, being introverted and don't have anyone who could be a "mentor" figure in my life. Both my parents, and my husbands parents have always worked low wage, low skill jobs, and 3 out of 4 never even completed high school. I literally don't know a single person who has a similar job. Is going to school worth it? I am concerned with my age (28) and lack of experience in any type of professional job. Will people want to hire a 32 year old new graduate? I have a lot of anxiety that it is already too late for me.

One thing I am totally uninterested in is continuing in nannying or any other type of child care.....I don't want children of my own, and even though I love the children, I do not want to continue down this path as a career. I am also very tired of the changing nature of the job, and the lack of health insurance and benefits. I had no idea what I was getting into when I started, I was just beyond tired of retail.

Sorry for the length, and I deeply, deeply appreciate any ideas, thoughts, experience or ideas that others could impart about my future plans, or anything I could try to do now.

Have I been going about quitting all wrong?

Anonymous — Wed, 22 May 2013 17:59:41 GMT

I'm about to quit my job. I'm becoming increasingly aware that this is going to come as a huge surprise to my boss and coworkers. Should I have been dropping hints?

The gory details: I'm in academia (but not a professor) and I'm leaving for a new industry, in large part because I don't like my long-term job prospects in academia. I haven't had to use any of my current coworkers/bosses for references. I'm planning to give just over a month's notice, although I could extend this, and I'm carefully planning ways to wrap up my current projects and documenting things that the next person in my position will have to do. I have not told any of my coworkers that I'm planning on quitting because I've always believed that it was unprofessional to tell anyone other than your boss first, but this has become increasingly difficult over the past month or so - I'm constantly running up against "Oops, can't talk about that!" topics in conversation with coworkers.

I've been careful to not make promises or specific plans for things that will happen after I'm planning to be gone. I've made dissatisfied noises about my job to coworkers (starting long before I began to make my exit plan), and have had some sincere heart-to-hearts with my boss about what I want from but am not getting from this job. But no one seems to think that I would actually *leave* (I've been here a few years and not one person has left our department since a year or two before I started, so it's not like they're crazy to think this). Also I don't think it would ever cross their minds that I would leave our field.

Is this just normal? When I've left previous jobs (all in the academic/nonprofit world) either I left when a grant ran out and my position was no longer funded, or I was in a place that was an obvious bad fit for me and the organization and they were happy to see me go, or my boss actively helped me look for a better job and wrote me glowing references and things.

tl;dr: I have no experience leaving a pretty good job where they're happy with my work, and I'm afraid of how my coworkers (particularly my boss, who is well-meaning but a little bit prone to freakouts) will react, and I wonder whether there's anything I could have done to make this easier (short of months of slovenly work and loud complaining).

I can't stop cracking my knuckles, and I'm cracking up

Anonymous — Wed, 22 May 2013 17:57:15 GMT

Excessive knuckle-cracking is causing lasting pain in my hand, but I can't stop doing it.

First off, I realize I need professional help. I just don't know where to start - medical? psychological? psychiatric? pharmaceutical?

I am a 35 year old woman. I was diagnosed with OCD in my early 20s, and dealing with a particular personal issue. Since then I have been seeing a psychologist as needed for some personal issues when they come up - anxiety, obsessive thoughts, worry, etc - but not on a regular basis.

A couple of years ago, I developed a habit of running my finger along my eyelashes while reading or web surfing, more in my left hand than on my right. After several months I noticed I was starting to get some pain in my finger and wrist as I did it, but had trouble breaking the habit. A few weeks ago, after I noticed the pain being stronger, I quit "cold turkey" and haven't done it since.

A week or so later, I noticed I was still having some pain, and noticed that it sometimes happened when I cracked my knuckles in my thumbs. This is something I've been doing since junior high, but I'm not sure if it really counts as knuckle cracking. Basically I noticed in junior high that if I flexed my thumbs so that they were completely straight, then bent them all the way, I would hear and feel a satisfying "crack." So I've been doing this for over 20 years, where sometimes I feel like my thumbs need a crack. There are some times when I think they feel like they need to be cracked, but I flex & bend my thumbs and get nothing.

So getting back to the pain in my hand. I noticed that I still felt some pain in my left hand whenever I cracked that thumb knuckle. So I decided I would also stop doing that "cold turkey." Except I can't. It's like when you try to stop thinking about something, you think about it even more. I am now literally cracking my left thumb every five minutes all day - whereas I used to do it a few times a day at most. I seem to have lost the ability to know when it needs to be cracked, and I just keep doing it - so sometimes I hear and feel the satisfying crack, and sometimes I get nothing. I try to stop, and then I just keep thinking about it - what if my knuckle needs to be cracked? I suddenly have become conscious of every minute ticking by, wondering how long it's been and if maybe I could try cracking it again. I'm hoping that people who are regular knuckle-crackers will know what I'm talking about, where you feel the urge in your fingers to crack, and it's hard to ignore. Except like I said, I can't seem to tell anymore whether I really need to. So I only end up feeling a crack about 1/4 or 1/3 of the times I do it. But I
keep cracking just in case.

So now the pain in my left hand is worse. I have pain along the outside of my pinky finger the outside of the hand itself, the top of my hand, my wrist and sometimes my arm. I'm really scared that it's going to get worse and I'm going to end up not being able to use my hand. If I can inject a bit of humor into this rambling story, it reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where George was hand model. He was warned about a model who was not master of his domain and ended up with a deformed "claw" from overuse, and I keep thinking that the same thing is going to happen to me.

So I don't know where to go now. I have a psychologist that I see occasionally, but she's mainly helped me with anxiety and worries - I'm not sure that stopping knuckle-cracking is within her expertise. Do I need a psychiatrist instead? Last year I was taking Wellbutrin for depression and it *really* helped with obsessive thoughts I was having at the time, and I keep wondering if I should take it again to make me stop thinking about cracking my thumb - but the original reason I had stopped taking it was due to bad side effects. After the Wellbutrin I had tried Cymbalta but it didn't seem to help as much. Back in college when I suffered from depression I had variously tried Prozac, Zoloft and Celexa, but had side effects from each of them. I'm wondering if it would be worth trying an over-the-counter product like 5-HTP.

Then there is the option of going to an orthopedic doctor or other medical doctor about the pain, but I'm not sure if that would help if I can't stop the underlying (mental) cause. I feel like the only solution would be to somehow immobilize my thumb completely so that I can't move it at all, but I have no idea how that could be done.

Just to reiterate, what I am doing is probably not how most people crack their knuckles. What I do is extend my thumb so it is completely straight, then bend it all the way (just using the thumb itself, I'm not using my other hand to bend it).

Okay, enough rambling. As you can see, I'm a mess. Help?

I'm turning 40. In Paris. Help me plan the perfect night.

bodgy — Wed, 22 May 2013 17:50:09 GMT

I'm spending my 40th birthday in Paris (early August). I want to have a memorable evening with my husband. Help me pick a fabulous restaurant, a great place for a dessert (either at the same restaurant or elsewhere) and an activity.

I was all set for Chez Francis (stunning view of Eiffel Tower) until I heard it was merely a tourist trap (did I read it wrong?). I'm looking for a French restaurant that would make for a romantic dinner. Moderately priced is my budget (between 100-200 euros is ok). We don't have a car so it must be metro and walk accessible. We are staying in the 17th arrondissement by the Port Maillot station. Not afraid to hop the Metro to anywhere.

Where should we eat? Any place special you can suggest just for dessert? What kind of fun and/or romantic activities would you suggest?

Engrossing, non-disturbing book recommendations

Serene Empress Dork — Wed, 22 May 2013 17:36:25 GMT

Anxiety along with a tendency to depression is kicking up lately, and I'm having a hard time finding non-disturbing yet entertaining things to distract myself with. I need recommendations of books that will be engrossing enough to keep me interested without dark/scary/disgusting/horrifying elements.

No:

-Ghosts, demons, monsters, psychopathic killers or violent crime of any kind
-Torture
-Graphic descriptions of medical conditions or injuries
-Recent losses, grief, delving deeply into past losses
-Disasters, accidents
-Bleak, dystopian
-gross-out elements
-characters or subjects who just have really sad lives

I know some of these kinds of books can be "ultimately redemptive" but I'm just not up for that right now.

Yes:

-Fiction with engrossing characters
-Humor (I'm enjoying Mary Roach's "My Planet" but can't handle her science/humor books... too much graphic awfulness mixed in with the cleverness.)
-Non-fiction (I know that's vague, but I don't want to limit the answers too much.)
-Spiritual (peaceful, calming, uplifting)

So, what books would you recommend me?

ISProblems

eviemath — Wed, 22 May 2013 17:31:16 GMT

What is it with CenturyLink, and some ISP in Hong Kong whose name I forget, that every so often it will decide that it can't "find" a web page... usually one that I was just at, and often including metafilter! Instead of going to the page I want, it redirects me to a CenturyLink search page, like this, which has the link I want at the very top (www.metafilter.com in this example), yet when I click on that link from their completely extraneous search page, it just goes back to the same search page?!

I am travelling, and this is not my home ISP. I am using Firefox, with NoScript. But I only have this problem with certain ISPs (namely, CentruyLink, and whatever it was in Hong Kong).

How do I not get screwed on freelance editing work?

Dr. Lurker — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:40:56 GMT

My question is in regards to making sure I get paid for my work. I'll be billing private individuals as opposed to companies and thus am concerned there will be less incentive for them to pay for services rendered.

After having done some copy editing for pay as kind of a favor for an acquaintance, I now have the chance to do some work for people that are strangers. For now, the work is copy editing and proofing theses and dissertations for grad students. Thus, I'll be dealing with individuals as opposed to companies and businesses.

I charge by the hour and typically bill after completing the job and calculating the hours. I am afraid clients might not pay after I deliver the goods. Do I need a contract? Can I ask for some money up front as kind of a good faith gesture? I prefer charging by the hour instead of charging a lump sum because I feel like it is more fair to me as well as to my often cash strapped clients. I also think it is fair to let the client review the work before paying in full. This is all intended as side income that I don't want to report, so I would rather avoid official channels.

Also, is paypal the best option for collecting payments? I'd like to give my clients the most options for payment methods as I know paying in cash is often a hardship for grad students.
Anything else I should be thinking about?

Cheap, reliable used car or truck with a little character?

Kwine — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:36:16 GMT

I haven't owned a car since 2010, but now it seems like going back to a two-car household might be a good idea. My wife drives a 2004 Volvo S40 daily to work. She often gets home very late on weekdays, and usually takes it to meet her cycling group for the better part of a day on Saturday or Sunday, and I have started to feel like I'm too reliant on her schedule or my friends to get to weekend activities, or to duck out to get another few bags of mulch or can of paint, etc.

We live in north Seattle. This would not be a daily driver, I would continue to take the bus to work, so gas mileage isn't a concern. I would drive it once or twice a week to my sports activities (usually golf and soccer) or the hardware store. I would like it to be at least reasonably reliable and not cost a fortune to maintain-I would prefer a car that broke down more frequently but was cheaper to repair, vs. one that was more reliable but required more expensive repairs and maintenance. If it is a car, I would like it to have four doors. It seems handy to have it be a truck, to do truck-type activities, but I don't know much about trucks. I would kind of prefer that it have a manual transmission.

If possible, I would like it to stand out a little bit-for example, I think C3 Corvettes look awesome and can be had reasonably cheaply, but don't meet my practicality requirements. 'Weird' is maybe closer than 'cool'-if there were some little 80s or 90s thing that met the other requirements and would let me be known as 'That guy with the ____', said with a skeptical eye and a shake of the head, that's maybe what i'm after here. Let's say I'll budget a marginal $500 a year for character expenses-if it's got the right sort of weirdness, I'm ok with spending an extra $500 a year over what a Corolla or whatever would cost in maintenance and repairs.

Let's say I have $10,000 in my budget, but I could reach a little for the right vehicle. If you know what to look for to indicate whether a particular specimen of your recommended used vehicle is a good value, that would be outstanding information to know. Thanks!

Quirky indie songs about love and happiness

aka burlap — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:32:26 GMT

My dear friend who is known for making awesome mix tapes/CDs/playlists is getting married, and I'd love to give him an awesome mix CD as part of my wedding present. So, musical & in-the-know folks of AskMe, please give me your best suggestions for what songs should be on it! Artist suggestions welcome too, but ideally you will suggest specific songs.

What I'm looking for:
* Songs about happiness and love and making a life together (especially songs about love between two playful, creative, quirky people)
* Summery-feeling songs or songs that evoke California and L.A.
* At least a few lesser-known artists/songs. He is pretty knowledgeable about music, but it would be awesome to be able to introduce him to something new.
* I have a slight preference for current stuff, so that this mix can remind him of 2013 and this time in his life. Older stuff is fine too though.

He has pretty broad taste in music, but his favorites tend towards quirky and well-made indie-type stuff, alt/jazzy bluegrass, and some classic singer-songwriter/rock.

By way of getting your minds going, here's a long list of some of the many artists he likes:
* John Hartford
* The Magnetic Fields
* Bela Fleck
* Beach House
* The Books
* Animal Collective
* The Decemberists
* The Shins
* The Mountain Goats
* Fun
* Gotye
* The Tallest Man on Earth
* Dirty Projectors
* Seu Jorge
* Iron Horse
* Deerhunter
* Best Coast
* Florence + The Machine
* OK Go
* Lost in the Trees
* Phosphorescent
* Arcade Fire
* Neutral Milk Hotel
* Lightships
* Wilco
* Iron & Wine
* The Avett Brothers
* Old 97's
* Beirut
* Tom Petty
* The Beatles
* Paul Simon
* Cat Stevens

All right, dazzle me with your songs of love and joy!

Physical Project Management System

crush-onastick — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:26:04 GMT

I direct a research center at a policy institute and I'm also an analyst. I need a project management system and I want a physical system, not software or an application. Other than whiteboards, what are my options? Among whiteboards, which are really useful? Right now I have an electronic calendar and various notes/lists to remind me to do things and frankly, it's not working. In the past, I've tried various to-do list applications, as well as Basecamp, and they did not work for me either.

I have, basically, three types of workflows. Type 1 is typically an 18-24 month project, front loaded with administrative tasks (getting data sets, securing pro bono work, setting timelines, defining tasks, assembling working groups) that I am either wholly responsible for or wholly responsible for nagging into completion. Type 1 usually has a middle part that has me doing some research, interviewing, and checking in with pro bono workers to make sure they are competing their tasks. The end part of Type 1 projects have me drafting preliminary reports, meeting with working groups to discuss preliminary reports, revising and releasing reports, debriefing the project. Press releases and blog posts figure into all stages of Type 1 projects.

Type 2 projects usually track Type 1, but without all the front end admin tasks, although I am generally responsible for setting timelines and goading people into meeting deadlines. In these projects, I do research, make sure pro bono professionals are doing their research, coordinate the drafting, revising, and releasing of reports, but do not do as much writing as in Type 1 projects. Then I debrief the project for our board. Press releases and blog posts figure into some stages of Type 2 projects, which usually last 6-18 months.

Type 3 projects are managed by someone else entirely and I am generally only expected to know the timeline, do some research and writing, and other discrete tasks as needed.

At any given time, I have 5-9 projects of varying types to track and everything I'm doing now (electronic and printed calendars, electronic to-do lists, post-its on my monitor) don't allow me to visualize the entire workload simultaneously. <---- That's the most salient point: I want a physical project management board or system that helps me visualize my entire 6-18 month workload for 5-9 projects simultaneously.

Halp!

Birthday gifts for a new office drone?

peachfuzz — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:22:42 GMT

Ack, I need birthday gift ideas for my sister. She's turning 27, working in her first office job, is across the country from me. She loves...uh, organizing and cleaning things? And working out, I think? And...she has a dog and a new house? help

I love my sister! But we don't really have a lot of hobbies or interests in common, so it's hard to know what to get her.

She just got a new job, and while she loves the job I know it's tough for her to be cooped up inside all day (she's coming from years of coaching college rowing). I was thinking of maybe getting her an assortment of desk toys and other stuff. What are the coolest, most useful/interesting/not cheesy or dumb desk toys you know of?

Alternately: She's been doing all this hardcore nesting lately, moving into a house and getting a dog and trying to cook more and setting up a life with her boyfriend. It seems like something she's very focused on lately. What would you have liked at that whole embarking-on-adulthood stage of life? Sort of like what you would give a new college graduate, except she's a few years beyond that.

Requirements: Something I can order and have shipped to her, or possibly something that can be picked up in the DC area, where she is. Budget is $100ish.

This seems terribly vague :( But I know her budget is tight lately and she's a little down overall about things and I want to give her something that makes her feel like she is rocking at life. Thanks, hive mind!!

Singapore Eid read out

aseno — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:16:11 GMT

The Aseno family is planning to go to Singapore few days after this year's Eid (end of Ramadan). We know in other muslim countries, Eid celebration can last up for up to a week afterwards. Businesses (read: attractions and great food joints) usually take long vacations before they open again on regular hours. We're not planning to go touristy, but instead want to absorb local life style, eat and go where locals go. So, citizens of Metafilter, is it wise to travel to Singapore close to Eid, given our objectives, or should we wait another week or two until it's normal again? Or, if I may switch my perspective, are there anything that is worth traveling to Singapore during/near Eid?

How to handle a prospective employer calling my current employer?

pintapicasso — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:15:25 GMT

I applied for a job 4 hours away. I've since decided that I do not want it. However, I'm worried that they will contact my current supervisor as a reference and she has no idea I'm considering leaving.

1. I have not yet been offered the position at the job I applied for, but I imagine I will.
2. The reasons why I'm no longer interested: When I was contacted by HR I learned that the position is only 24 hours per week and does not qualify for benefits.
3. I originally listed two former coworkers as references, as my current job is the first job in my field so I could not ask any former supervisors. I obviously didn't want to list my current supervisor because I did not want to preemptively tell her I was leaving.
4. Prospective job HR contacted me and asked if they could have a supervisor reference. I explained my position and he said that she would only be contacted "in the last stage." I gave him my supervisors name.
5. Since then an internal position has opened and I have applied for it. I am so worried that the prospective job will contact my director/supervisor for a reference and she will be like"???".
6. Also since applying I was given a substantial merit based raise which has made me want to stay.

How do I handle this? I want to keep my current job.

Recommendations for Surf Camps/Schools in Costa Rica/Nicaragua?

copacetic — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:14:25 GMT

We're looking for a 5-7 day surf school to give my sister as a graduation (from grad school) gift. She's fluent in Spanish, and doesn't need anything super luxury, just good instruction, good break, good vibes. Any ideas?

I know Tamarindo in CR and Sayulita in MX are two of the most common destinations, but I'd love any recommendations for specific businesses. She's already done a 3-day camp in Long Island, and I'm hoping this will be the stretch that gets her over the beginner hump, so I'm looking for a place that actually has good teachers and equipment good enough to not cause frustration. She's not into nightlife, and not into being pampered, but loves a chill beach scene. I've heard there are even some all-girls camps?

Help find the Italian script of this clip

sanskrtam — Wed, 22 May 2013 16:13:05 GMT

Can anyone find or type down the script of this clip from the game StarCraft II? It's in Italian.

Software to monitor network activity AND which program is active?

gnossos — Wed, 22 May 2013 15:59:17 GMT

I am looking for some software (cheap, free) that will tell me which program is currently accessing the net AND how much traffic is being transferred.

I have found lots of software that will tell me which port is in use, or which port is assigned to a certain program on my computer, but I can find no software that will tell me which program on my computer is currently transferring files to and from the net and the current transfer rates.

I am using Win7 on both 32 bit and 64 bit machines.

Can anyone help?

Thanks.

Gnossos

New car, yay! Hip pain, uh-oh.

dywypi — Wed, 22 May 2013 15:45:05 GMT

A couple of weeks ago, I bought a new Subaru Impreza, which I drive for 45 minutes twice a day. Now I'm developing pain in my right hip, and I suspect there's a connection, or something I'm doing wrong, posture-wise.

I'm going to tweak all possible settings for the seat, steering wheel, etc., and stay aware of how I'm sitting. I was wondering if anyone else has had this issue, especially with Subarus, and whether you found adjustments and/or strategies that helped. For instance, did it seem to be specifically a matter of distance from pedals (or how I depress the pedals), or something unexpected such as seat back tilt?

I've searched online and found various suggestions; I would like to hear your first-hand experiences. Thanks.

Tech filter-Do you know which coax type is used to extend this antenna?

cheechman85 — Wed, 22 May 2013 15:35:07 GMT

I am currently installing a HP Indoor-Outdoor Point-to-Point Dual Band 10/13dBi MIMO 3 Element Antenna (J9170A). It comes with three pigtails with N type connectors. I need to extend the pigtails 100ft but am unsure of which coax type to use. Thanks!

Definitely not crunch time

elizeh — Wed, 22 May 2013 14:48:55 GMT

Annoyingly, crunches irritate a bulging disc in my back. Since I'm not keen on having surgery just so I can do this one thing (the disc doesn't otherwise bother me, as long as I keep my core strong), what alternatives to crunches can I try? If it matters: I do already do push-ups, planks and side planks.

Summer Reading You Want to Finish

xenization — Wed, 22 May 2013 14:37:11 GMT

Summer's here. In need of amazing novel recommendations. Particulars within.

The semester is over. Huzzah! Now I have some time for leisure reading, and I find myself craving novels—something immersive, mind-blowing.

AskMe is always so swell about book recommendations, so I put it to you all: What was the last jaw-on-the-floor incredible novel you read? Or, one you recommend to everyone else, regardless of their personal tastes, with an earnest "You have to read this!"

Caveats: No love stories. Stories with a touch of the fantastical or off-beat are particularly welcome, though not required. Otherwise, fire away. Thanks!

How to escape low-wage service jobs in your 20s?

bluelight — Wed, 22 May 2013 14:31:00 GMT

Those of you post-grads figuring it out in your 20s (or 30s) doing odd jobs, waiting tables, jobs not nec. related to your major, where are you now? What advice would you have if you could go back and do it again?

When I was 18, I met a bunch of 23 and 24 year old post-grads living together. Some of them weren't working. Others were working part time shifts at coffee shops, restaurants, and bike shops. All of them were still figuring things out and not pursuing what they originally majored in. When I worked at a coffee shop at this age, my coworkers were late 20 somethings who were figuring things out too. They had been there for a while.

I wonder what happened to those people. And, I wonder if some of them are still working those part-time shifts, that have maybe turned full time. I'm not saying that working in retail or the food service industry is bad, but it's clear that these people had meant it to be a temporary gig.

Now that I'm a 23 year old post-grad, I'm a bit surprised to find myself in the same boat. I majored in architecture, which was hit very hard with the recession, not to mention the flood of architecture grads already looking for work. The pay for entry-level architects is not very high, the hours tend to be very long, and the work is, usually, but not always, pretty mundane as an entry-level with lots of autoCAD, scanning, and Adobe. Anyway, I've decided it's not for me. I've had an inkling of this thought in university, but I excelled as a student and didn't pay it enough thought since school was pretty easy and rewarding for me (scholarships, awards, etc.) But now that I'm faced with reality, none of those things really matter, and more importantly, I know that it's not what I want to do. So now what?

Obviously I need to get a job, so while I'm figuring things out, I plan to get a part time retail or food service job. I understand how easy it is to get comfortable in these jobs though, and that's what I'm afraid of. Waitressing will likely pull in more money hourly (+ tips) than an entry-level architecture job, you'll get more person-to-person interaction, you don't stare at a screen all day and you're on your feet which is much healthier than sitting all the time. But there are no health benefits and though it'll be enough to comfortably live day-to-day, it's not an ideal setup for planning long-term. I know the solution would be to keep your eye on the prize, which is figuring out your next career move, but I'm afraid I'll just slide and get stuck into the service industry field. I don't even know what general direction I want to go. Those aforementioned 20-somethings are now in their late 20s or early 30s and I wonder how many of them are still in those types of jobs. And with the economy the way it is, I wouldn't really be surprised if they haven't left.

So have you found yourself in this position as a post-grad reconsidering your career options (i.e. not wanting to pursue what you majored in but not sure of what you want)? Are you still in it? Or have you successfully used that time off whilst working part time jobs to find out what you really want?

And do you have any advice for someone like me? Or a past you?

Thanks!

Weight regimen?

to sir with millipedes — Wed, 22 May 2013 13:16:35 GMT

I'm not looking to become a muscle guy, but I'd like a weight/exercise regimen that will help me tone my upper body. Can anyone give me a suggestion?

I have been exercising in earnest this year to great effect - I've lost @ 40 LBS, and I'm more comfortable in my skin than I have been in a long time. Most of the exercise I'm doing is lower body stuff. Elliptical machine and arc trainer, stationary bike, things like that.

I wanted to start doing some exercises to tone my upper body a bit so I can add a bit of muscle. I'm not particularly looking to become musclebound, but right now I have very little upper body strength to speak of. I have been using the weight machines at my gym, but I don't really know what I'm doing and I don't have a routine, so I don't think it's having an incredible effect. Does anyone have an upper body exercise routine that has really worked for them?

Is this legit or a bunch of hooey?

PuppetMcSockerson — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:27:11 GMT

Can anyone tell me if Audio Visual Entrainment (AVE) actually does anything? Does it actually help with depression/anxiety, or is it all just a bunch of hooey? Is it worth the money?

Best UK mobile provider for my situation?

olinerd — Wed, 22 May 2013 10:57:27 GMT

I am in the UK. I live in Plymouth. My one year Vodafone contract is finally up and I hate them with a passion. I'd like to switch, but as a still relatively new ex-pat I don't know who to switch to. Can you recommend a provider to me based on my requirements inside?

I have an iPhone 5. I mostly use it for data - work email, personal email, navigation, texting, reading Metafilter on the trains, personal hotspot when I need to connect my laptop while I'm on the go. I live in Plymouth and mostly travel around the southwest/south, though I occasionally go to London. I keep my UK SIM in for travel within Europe, but swap to a US SIM when I'm in that country. Work takes me to other (non-European) countries in which I usually just have them pay the international roaming for my UK SIM. I don't much care about 4G since I sincerely doubt there's even 4G in most of the places I spend my time in. 3G is usually hard enough.

Things I hate about Vodafone:
(1) I've traveled internationally on a monthly basis for the last year. For the first eight months, every single time I was out of the country, they'd cut off my data, saying I'd reached a cap. Twice they cut off my voice too (but required a phone call to re-enable it, because that makes sense?) This kept happening despite me asking every single time to remove any caps. The only reason it hasn't happened in the last few months is that I've mostly only been traveling to the US and I have a dedicated SIM there now. This is infuriating, interferes with my ability to do my job, and shows some pretty crap customer service. Not cool. Don't want this any more.

(2) No visual voice mail. Didn't realize how attached I'd grown to it until I didn't have it. I would like visual voice mail back please. I think O2 might be the only ones in the UK who do this? Is that still accurate?

(3) Unreliable delivery and notification of voice mails. There are some I never get at all.

(4) Same for text messages.

(5) I get a "robot voice" from callers occasionally where the beginning and ends of words are clipped or weirdly digitized. I haven't been able to narrow down any particular combination of providers (sometimes it happens with landlines) but it is typically always from the same people, such as my husband. It doesn't happen when I'm calling them on the same handset with the US SIM so I'm blaming it on the provider. I would like not to have robot voices, particularly when I'm being called by someone for work.

I don't really care about any particular plans or rates or contracts; I'm happy enough to talk to people in the stores about that. What I really want is a provider that doesn't suck, and I'm hoping you can point me toward the right one. Who has the reputation as the least-terrible mobile provider in the UK?

Recommendations for non-English language hip-hop

roofus — Wed, 22 May 2013 10:20:57 GMT

International MeFites can you recommend great hip-hop either entirely in non-English language, or featuring mainly non-US English dialects? previously

So. Itchy.

pikeandshield — Wed, 22 May 2013 10:00:00 GMT

YANAMD. I have many mosquito-bite like pimples on my arms, legs and parts of my back, which typically become itchy in the evenings. As I'm currently abroad and travelling I'm paranoid that it's the symptom of some rare tropical disease and I'm harbouring a parasite or something. Please put the mind of this hypochondriac at rest!

They look almost like acne when they're settled down, but sometimes become itchy and flare up like a mosquito bite. I can count about 15 on my arms and another 10 on my legs. (Pics: arm back forearm wrist)

They've appeared about 3 days ago, 2 days after returning home from SEA (Bangkok and Siem Reap) - initially I just thought they were hives so would go away in a few hours, but they're still here in the same spot 3 days later (albeit not as itchy or swelled). I'm currently in transit in a third country (Japan) before going back home in another fortnight. I have travel insurance with medical cover, but I want to know whether I can just wait for 2 weeks until I get home, or whether this seems like something worth going through the arduous admin for to get treated here in Japan.

I have no fever or anything but do have general malaise (which I attributed to tiredness from my trip), plus some stomach aches and gastro (but not overly out of the ordinary). Is this bedbugs? Hayfever? Heat? Hives? Tapeworm? YANAMD, but just asking for some reassurance or insights into what this is/isn't.

Hunt for a rental while still here or when I get there?

glache — Wed, 22 May 2013 08:51:46 GMT

Hi everyone I'm relocating for the first time ever out of the family home. Should I start should start house hunting now *for a rental) while I'm away, or wait till I get there (I'm very happy to hostel it for a bit, as I don't know of anyone in the area and I'm a bit funny about couchsurfing). Thanks!

finding out what we can take from the UK, to Germany, in a car

Megami — Wed, 22 May 2013 07:40:04 GMT

We are moving to Germany. I have to fly* but my husband is driving, from the UK to Germany. Our removalists will pack nothing perishable, including food in sealed containers, liquid toilettries etc. Can we just take them in the car?

Specifically, I would be looking to try and bring the following with us:
- Potted orchids
- Pantry items, some in bottles/cans/jars never opened, some already used (like the gazillion jars of spices we have)
- Cleaning items, washing powders etc.
I am assuming this would all be okay travelling around within the EU BUT the last thing I want is my husband stopped and given a hard time for carrying a plant or something over national borders when he is not meant to.
Is there a website somewhere that sets this all out clearly, in English?

*Long story to do with visa status, the MOD and their refusal to move our car.