Aspiring Mom2three

I'm still here

2011-10-15T18:37:00.000-05:00

I'm here. Really, I'm still here. It's been almost a month since I last wrote and there are days that go by that I don't even get to the computer to turn it on. Overwhelmed at times with feeling like I need to get it all done but realizing that it's okay it doesn't have to be "all done". I've been here before and I am smart enough to know I'm not the only one. God gives me moments and answers just when I need them, in His time.

No one has died or fallen ill because

the floor wasn't mopped
the laundry is still in the basket
the dishwasher still needs to be emptied
we had "clean out the fridge night" again. So thankful that we have extra food!
the baby toys are still on the living room floor when I go to bed
the bathroom tub looks "slightly" used this week
the dog cleans up the kitchen floor when food is dropped

I've been battling with sleepless nights (even with a prescription sleeping pill) and exhaustion during the day. I've battled with this since college, but seems it has gotten worse With little ones that I care for, sleeping during the day is not an option. After trying Lunesta and still not sleeping through the night or even going to sleep, the doctor put me on a different med and I am thankfully sleeping until my alarm goes off most days. I'm a much nicer person when I get sleep!

Lady with Miss C

Kids

Oldest has started college and got his first official job working at Ultimutt Dog Care as a dog handler. Seems like we see him less, but he is loving having classes finish before 1 p.m.
Only is in the middle of her senior year just started her first official job at Pizza Warehouse as party and game hostess. She continues cleaning homes for two families once a week - doing school in the mornings.
Youngest is in 8th grade and very involved in Boy Scouts. He enjoyed an adventurous summer camp and is involved in a local drama winter production of A Christmas Carol.
Little Ones: I no longer care for Miss H, but have added a new little one, Miss C, who was born the end of this June. Sweet baby smiles and cuddles are what I love.

I was blessed when Glenda at Notes on the Journey told me I had won a copy of Life: Beautiful (Faith for Your Journey) on her blog giveaway. It is filled with not only beauty, but inspiration and encouragement in my faith. I have really enjoyed reading through it - I needed that!

Adams Photography

We finally had some family pictures taken by our sweet friend and talented photography, Amy from Adams Photography. I'm making a shameless plug for her - she has a wonderful affordable Fall Special going on if you live in my area.
Contact her by:

Email: maadams0408@yahoo.com
Facebook

Finally comfortable

Our poor German Shepard, Lady had surgery 10 days ago to remove a large vascular tumor, commonly referred to as "The Hangy Downy thing" in our home. Her incision was 6" long and horribly uncomfortable, but we are thankful to have it done. Y We switched vets this year to a clinic closer to home and at this time, we've seen a big blessing financially. The first day we took her there for a yearly check up (shots and stuff) - I had been saving for the $58 from my baby-sitting checks and God gave us the BIGGEST blessing! Someone came in, while we were back with the vet, asking if we were there, and PAID our vet bill for that day!!!!! I was in tears when I left! I still don't know who our angel was, but we are over whelmed with their kindness. Yesterday we had her stitches out and found out the results of the histopathology. What the vet said just about made me crumble on the floor and cry, but I had Youngest with me, said the mass was potentially Malignant. I know that says potential, which is a big word, but we have a big God. I know this is just a dog, but this dog does not leave my side. For some reason, she follows me around constantly, watching me, dependent on me to make sure she feels safe. I'm not a dog person and really just tolerate them, but I must say I do love this dog.

Taken Hostage

2011-09-20T07:04:00.002-05:00

Poor Honey was startled this last week

to discover this critter was using

our TRASHCAN for it's latest home

unwelcome visitor

Yes, that is a possum that crawled INSIDE a plastic bag on some cool night

seeking shelter in the midst of our trash and baby diapers

Our family was taken hostage this last week, by the most vial (think skunk smell) and ugly creature, forcing us to store our trash in the garage. Oh, we tried a variety of methods to make it leave

we asked it nicely (by leaving off the lid)
not too nicely by kicking the can
We made fun of it
we gawked at it
took pictures
poked it with a stick
Honey got out his BB gun and shot it several times
(those who may be with PETA please stop reading)
and put the lid back on.

Guess what? Last night when Honey checked on it last night, It was playing possum, literally! It had crawled out of the bag and found a more comfy place. When he moved the can it merely stretched like a lazy kitten blinking it's eyes as if to say "Is that all you've got?"

Playing possum

Growing tired of this situation, Honey and Oldest put on their brave faces, took the can and our stinky visitor to the stream beside our house, tipped it over and waited for it to get the hint.

It did not. So grabbing the nearest eviction notice (a big stick), they prodded and drug it from it's slumber, until it finally had enough. Our trash can now has a vacancy and we're not looking for new tenants.

This is probably the most gross thing I've written about and it's
kinda silly that we let such a ugly little creature hold us hostage. I know there is a spiritual thought tiptoeing quietly through my head, but with a 3 day migraine, it's all I can muster at this point.

We're all laughing about it now, but it was quite the stinky situation! Have you ever had an unwanted visitor and what did you finally do to get it/them to leave? Would love to hear your story!

Zoe's Blissful Confection

2011-09-11T16:00:00.000-05:00


in the beginning

A little more than nine months ago

over a delicious Italian dinner

a sweet friend confessed,

she was expecting
a new little one

a girl, we later learned

and Immediately a plan formed in my brain

Some girlish material for a sweet little girl.

Zoe's Blissful Confection Quilt

So fresh from God

Why I choose the Blissful Confection quilt pattern:

Confection: a work of fine or elaborate craftsmanship

Babies are a beautiful gift and the product of elaborate crafsmanship from God + a little of Daddy + a little of Momma = A Blissful Confection (Zoe)

Pinning down the quilt

Zoe's quilt

So I present to you

Zoe's Blissful Confection Baby Quilt

Made from the heart

Her foot prints

Bob and Audra

Today, we visited Zoe's family and presented the quilt to her. I'm horribly nervous each time - Just praying they wouldn't look too closely (but they did).

Zoe (Isn't she just a cutie!)

Isabella (older sister) wanted in on the pix

Back side

The front

I'm really not great at this stippling and free-motion quilting yet, but it's getting better. The Quilt Lady is a great encourager and teacher, a great listener, and makes this easier. I'm so thankful that through quilting I'm reminded that only God creates things perfect.

Gifts of Grace

2011-08-29T18:18:00.000-05:00

Recent Gifts of Grace

Only with Baby Zoe

Baking 800 cookies with the help of great ladies
Date night with Honey
Friday - a break from the craziness of the week
Full nights sleep
Kids cleaning up the kitchen without being asked
Baby Zoe arrived safe and healthy 9 lb 12 oz!!!
Wonderful cool morning, quiet with only the birds singing
Honey brings, yet another racing tire home - I love his boyish side!

Honey with his tire

If you would like to join in recording the Gifts that He has given you, or would like to learn about "A Dare to Live Fully, Right Where you Are: One Thousand Gifts , go to Ann's blog at A Holy Experience and join people from all walks of life and places in the world as we Count His Gifts.

What do you say, but pray?

2011-08-23T22:01:00.000-05:00

Yesterday evening, I sat with a friend in her vehicle, expecting to hear about her first few days in the classroom, as our boys were in their Boy Scout meeting. She was unusually quiet, though she is soft spoken, she was missing her usual smile.

Her son, the same age as Oldest, had moved out of their family home just days after his return from the Belize mission trip and moved in with his girlfriend. I was stunned. She said that he had told them he didn't believe as he used to, that God doesn't answer prayers or talk to him, and the Bible/God can't be proved He is real. It's as if he has rejected everything he was taught and what he professed he once believed. There have been many trials in their family and their children made their professions of faith without prompting...

She said they have been praying and petitioning God to change his heart. They're hearts are breaking. They are clinging to:

Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6

It frightens me a bit as well. We're just at the beginning of our Oldest going to college, being more independent, venturing out, us learning to let go, believing and trusting that he will make choices of the heart that verify He is still so present and guiding him in all his decisions and life choices. Oh, this makes my tremble,

Gifts of Grace

2011-08-22T08:03:00.001-05:00

Recent Gifts of Grace

Only in Belize

Protection for Raine's husband during a heart attack - often called the Widow Maker. Stint placed in artery.
Temps so high (115º) that we hit a record for the country... no grass to mow because it's all dead!
Messages from Only while on Belize Mission Trip
Wonderful refreshing rain during drought and high temps (117º)
Parents who don't spoil or give in to their kids to the point the children that they are more than difficult to be around.
Youngest's movies he creates, frame by frame, action in motion, brain whirling, creating.
Quiet evening with Honey
Plump juicy watermelon
Making mud puddles with youngest in the rain, mud squishing between toes.
Children who listen to God, go, see through His eyes the needs and loveA babe, so new of God, from His hands and heart
Seeing and hearing the words: Momma, Mommy, Mom
Doctors who follow the calling to help, solve, and save
To be a mom to three wonderful gifts God has given us.
Safely back from Belize, Oldest and Only, hearts open to experiences You've given them.
Oh, Sweet rain to a dry parched ground - quenching a thirst
Hugs from my big kids. I so missed them when they were gone to Belize
Sweet shy smiles and kisses from Miss I
Mike and Amy (dear friends) are pregnant and due in March!!!
Oldest has a JOB!!! Thank you God!!!

Miss J and Only at the Mayan Ruins

What I'm reading and who I visited this week

2011-08-21T19:17:00.000-05:00

It's always a treat when I can find a few minutes to visit friends and people, via blogs. Many times, I find the messages written there are somehow just what I needed to read. I'd like to share some of the post and blogs that really inspired, educated, and touched me.

Jamie at PrudentBaby showed her readers how to make Sun Butter. I have a few friends who have have children with severe Peanut/Nut allergies (one is air born) and I was so excited to see Jamie's post. I know that Sun Butter (like peanut butter, but made from sunflower seeds is very expensive to purchase, but safe for those with peanut allergies). Made sure I passed this on to those friends, but I'm tempted to try it myself!

Christina from Denmark, (Photographer and Life Coach) at Divas and Dreams really spoke to my heart when she honestly wrote how Comparison Kills and self esteem.

When our "inner critic monster" wants to sabotage our passion and creativity by comparing itself to another, it distract us from our flow, owning our value and unique contribution.
Jhen Stark at From Here to Eternity for her honest post that lead me to Christina

The Money Saving Queen wrote about being The Balance Queen

For the sake of complete honesty, this area has become a major struggle for me. I'm only mentioning it today because I know God is all about balance and if you are out of balance you can also easily take yourself out from the blessings of God as well. I've seen this in my own life. It is important to keep balance in all things

I loved Robin Dance's post at incourage about Just Breathe (marriage)

If you're needing a fun and simple experiment to do with your kids, try this experiment with "Magic Milk" and food coloring. Can you guess what we're going to study and do this week with the girls? Cows and milk!

I'm so glad you stopped by for a short visit. I would love to hear what has been going on with you this week!

Circling around and leaving a mark

2011-08-19T10:55:00.000-05:00

When I left the public school system a few years ago, I didn't think I would really use my teaching degree again (past homeschooling our two school age kids). I've worked in public schools, a preschool when Oldest was little, a private University Model school, and homeschooling. This last May, I ended a three year term as a private teacher for a family whose child has ADD and Aspergers. So what am I going to do when I grow up???

This week, it hit me... I've got these sweet little girls God has put in my life! So this week we started doing some fun learning activities and they seem to love it!

Happy Things

Yesterday's theme I planned ahead of time (Mice), and had no idea that Only would wake up to find one crawling ACROSS her bedroom floor! She's not been back in her by herself yet, but we'll catch that pesky critter! **Cute and Pesky Mouse was caught late last night by Youngest and has been reunited with his ancestors - all is well.

Each morning, after breakfast and watching an episode of Super Why, we're head to the living room for a little "Circle Time"

"Ashy, Ashy, Fall Down!"

Singing songs
reading books
talking and asking questions
Bible Story
talking about direction and placement
(I use an old Beanie Baby Frog that "leaps and crawls" under, over, on top, below, in, out, etc. of places)

Our Direction Frog

and if the girls are in a really good mood, a craft or science project. Yes, I know we are talking about 3 girls under the age of 3 - call me crazy...

Mice show how to mix primary colors

Yesterday day we had a great day talking about mice, counting, singing, doing London Bridges, finding Thumbkin, and learning how God made the world.

Miss I mixing colors

We had to find out how those pesky mice mixed their colors by doing it ourselves and boy did we have fun!

Miss AB Mixing colors

A Trio of Lunch time fun

Surprisingly, there was not a huge mess, especially with Miss AB. I later found out this was her first time doing finger painting.

I'm very thankful for the great parents who allow me the opportunity to watch their girls and to get to know them better. Each day is different, but we learn something new each day. I have really enjoyed getting to know the moms more each day and look forward to their brief visits at the end of the day.

Bugs, bats, natives and other tropical encounters

2011-08-17T13:42:00.000-05:00

Short video about the trip

On July 30th, Oldest and Only left for Belize for a week long mission trip with 19 other short term missionaries. I really wanted to share a little bit of what they did:

Miss J and Only at the Mayan Ruins

Sunday:

They went to church at the Dump today and studied Luke 4. They also went to the Mayan Ruins and to eat ice cream. They are looking forward to tomorrow. They are going to walk the streets of Bella Vista visiting and praying with people. May possibly do a building project. Thanks for praying...keep it up! One of the girls woke up with a 103 temp, ...

Monday:

1. Everyone is healthy!

2. They had a great day today ministering to children. They did a bible study and made bracelets with the 60 children that showed up.

3. Tomorrow they will be passing out sugar. Sugar is difficult to get there. They were able to buy 300 pounds of sugar today and are excited to give it away tomorrow.

From Only:


Only on the way to a village

Hey! Hope you're having a good week. I sure do miss you guys a lot. Can't wait to come home on Saturday and tell you all about the trip.

      It rained on Sunday and Monday so was pretty cool most of the day without the sun out.
      Tuesday in Bella Vista was hot hot hot because the sun was while out all day. Which made everyone irritable and grouchy. (Not to mention the bugs are more aggressive this year in my opinion.) But the kids who showed up seemed to really enjoy making bracelets and listening to the Bible story. There is a bit of a language barrier because most of the kids and families speak Spanish and Kache.

300 lbs of sugar

      Today we're going back to Bella Vista and I think we're going to distribute sugar around the village because Belize is going through a sugar shortage. Then we'll be back to show a movie later that night at the river of life church for the teenagers. Please pray that well be safe out there cause it can get pretty sketchy at night, because it's in a secluded part of the village.
       We've decided that we're going to leave a day early for the resort. :D So Thursday morning will be our clean up day at The Dump and we'll be leavng for the resort after our day in the village. As you can imagine we're all pretty excited about this. :)
I can't wait to see you guys Saturday!! Love and miss you guys soooooooooooooooooo much. Tell Youngest I can't wait to see him! :D

Only with Belize kids

Tuesday, Aug. 2: What a great day the team had yesterday. On Monday, they walked the village just talking with people. That opened the door for passing out the sugar yesterday. They had a great time doing that. As they passed out the sugar they invited people to come and watch one of the Jesus films. They had 176 people show up! Praise the Lord!

Oldest ended up waking up one morning to discover he had somehow rolled over on a small black scorpion while he was sleeping and killed it without being stung. We were so thankful for that! He actually brought it back with him in a ziplock bag. Gas was between $5.80-$6 a gallon (US currency). They also encountered bats, lizzards, iguanas, sand fleas (very painful), parrots, and many Belizian people hungry for God in their lives.

Show us some feet after walking!

Wednesday:

1) Walked the village of Bella Vista, Belize, meeting and praying with people,

2) had 60-70 kids for VBS at River of Life church. Tom taught the kids about "let the children come unto me," while the others made bracelets with the kids,

3) 176 people showed up for the movie on Wednesday night, led to many fruitful conversations, etc.,

4) prayed for local sick folks,

5) reconnected with folks from past trips.

At the Beach

Thursday About 3:00 (4 our time) they will be leaving the village to head to Jaguar Reef. They should get there after dinner time. Once there, they should have access to WiFi again…so be watching for those facebook updates J

Only and Honey - Home at last

Thanks for reading about what the kids did in Belize. Our family is looking forward to hearing and seeing how God is going to use this to impact their lives.

Gifts of Grace

2011-08-15T14:34:00.002-05:00

Recent Gifts of Grace

Having food on the table, the whole family around - laughter and love
Jello for sore throats
Tissues with Lotion - Oh so soft!
Sewing machines to make sewing faster and easier
Protection for Oldest when a shooting and triple murder happened just 3 blocks where he was working. The killer was not caught until a week later in MI
Weeks groceries only $42 cash!!! Gotta love Aldi's
Two sets of contacts free to tie me over until my eye check up, this is after I had gone past my change date on my last pair.
Belize trips are both completely paid for!
Re-reading stories of funny things our kids said or did when they were little tykes
Oldest and Only arrive safely in Belize with their Mission Team.
Youngest arrives safely home from Boy Scout camp
Relaxing massage
Oldest and Only arrive safely home after a week in Belize
Fire fighters and police working in the 110º+ heat
Sweet juicy watermelon - a 35 pound gift from Crabtree Farms! Oh so yummy and delicious!
Choices in education

Between the toes

2011-07-31T17:35:00.001-05:00

The best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Was so surprised

when

Youngest

reported

that it was

RAINING!!!

So I got him

to join

outside

A little dancing

in the driveway

some sloshing

in the only

puddle we could find

There's got to be something to be said

for making a mess!

You pray for rain,

you gotta deal with the mud too.

That's a part of it.
Denzel Washington

Pancake memories

2011-07-25T21:34:00.000-05:00

Did you ever do something and it takes you back to your childhood. Sometimes it's unexpected - like a tidal wave and other times it may come back as a gentle breeze - barely ruffling you memory - like a faint whiff of perfume.

MN Historical Society

Tonight it was pancakes. Sounds silly, I know, but as I was fixing Honey's favorite "Breakfast for dinner" meal, I was hit by a tidal wave memory. Youngest is at Boy Scout Camp, Only is working to earn money for the Belize mission trip she and Oldest are going on (they leave this Saturday), and Oldest is working this week to earn money for college. When there are so many gone, I go for as simple as possible. I was suddenly taken back to my elementary school years. While I make my pancakes from scratch, when I'm in a really BIG hurry or my kids are fixing pancakes, out comes the Bisquick.

Flickr

When I was growing up, my mom used to make pancakes (out of Bisquick) on Saturdays for us - you know the meal: Pancakes, bacon, syrup warmed on the stove, and scrambled eggs. Sometimes she would make silly shapes - Mickey Mouse, a smiley face, cat, or just squiggly intertwined lines. It's not so much the meal, but the pancakes that take me back. When my mom made pancakes, there were always these lumps of the mix left in each pancake, like it wasn't mixed thoroughly. Then I'd take a big pat of butter, melting thoroughly (I'm sure it wasn't healthy, but it sure tasted good!). You could probably press your fork on it slightly and melted butter would wet the underside. Pouring a "bit" of Aunt Jemima Syrup until it flowed off the sides like a sweet slow,thick river. No knife needed here to cut twin stack, but I always had to dissect the outside brown layer to find those small lumps hidden among the flaky texture. I think it must have drove my mom bananas! What I really loved to do, when she wasn't looking, was dip a piece of fried bacon into the pancake batter and eat it... Sick huh?

The funny thing is, when I've used Bisquick, I can't get those lumps in my pancakes no matter how little I mix it. Do you have a special memory of a childhood meal or something silly you used to do? Please tell me I'm not the only one out there! I'd love to hear your memory, no matter how silly and if you tried to recreate this for your kids.

Late Mother's Day gift

2011-07-21T16:56:00.000-05:00

photo credit

It was absolutely fabulous.

It's a little over due

With the girls arriving soon and school starting back up

I knew I had to do this soon.

Not sure why I didn't do this sooner.

One hour of pure relaxation

spent

getting a massage

at Pure Energy Massage

from Miss Nancy

Who knew I had so many knots

hidden so deep under these shoulder blades?

The massage

was so wonderful

that I made an appt

to get my last overdue gift next week

Now I'm off to fix dinner for Honey and myself

(what should I fix?)

as Youngest is spending the night with a friend

and Oldest and Only are painting and helping a friend move.

Maybe something Italian with some Rosa Di Rosa...

What I've been reading and visiting in blogworld

2011-07-13T13:11:00.023-05:00

These last few days, while I've been sick, I've had a little more time to visit some blogs I like to read. I wanted to share a few of these with you.

Craig Love thins out the herd of negative voices (eliminating negative voices) this was REALLY good. In all fairness, you really need to read all of his "Love" series to fully understand, but it very worth the time. for a matter of the heart.
The Queen Mommy wrote about Motherhood's Journey in which journaling about our growth, effort, accomplishments and successes through the journey of Motherhood and to see how God is changing us. This really touched my heart as a mom.
Glenda about her daughter following in a legacy of missionaries and moving to England with Reign Ministries.
Shelly at Life on the Wild Side about taking a sabbatical with her husband.

Walking across a precipice

Cindy at For One Another did a review of HOMESCHOOLOPY. What a hoot! I think it might be kind of fun, but if you know me, Monopoly is actually call The Divorce Game at our house. No, it has not caused a divorce, but it sure does not embody fond feelings. A few years ago, Youngest had a part in our church's Annual Business meeting which had The Great Adventure (Indiana Jones) theme. As a token of appreciation, he was given the Indiana Jones Monopoly game and it's actually the only Monopoly game we can play without huge disagreements.
Due to recent illness at our house, I made a ~~great~~ large investment in Jello and Kleenexes with Lotion (this has got to be the best invention - really!). Did you know that Jello has a Jell-O Lounge? Care to make a guess what that is about? Hint, you must be 21 to enter. Yes, recipes for Jello with a bit of a twist. I had no idea this was out there!

Finally decided to quit feeling like a train wreck and going to the doctor in an hour. Jello and yogurt are only good for so long.

Well, after two hours at the doctor's office, I have fluid on both ears, high fever (STILL) after 5 days, sinus junk and a myriad of other stuff. A horribly painful powerful antibiotic shot later, 5 days of free sample antibiotics, with a script for an additional 5 days ($10 a pill), and horrible headache I'm exhausted... Guess it's time to apply MORE Miracle Rub from The Momma. I was so thankful that Only drove me to the doctor and fixed dinner after gathering 5 dozen eggs and caring for friend's critter... Anyone need some eggs?

Gifts of Grace

2011-07-11T09:09:00.009-05:00

Some more recent gifts of grace

Morning kisses from the kids
Homemade sandwich bread
Oldest, working until 1:30 a.m., still got up for church the next morning.
Children, getting up on their own, honoring commitments made
Sirens sound- dedicated emergency workers give to save and protect
Mentors in marriage, showing through example.
Devotion of Lady, who should be fearsome, yet gentle and forgiving to the youngest, watchful, loyal
Watching fireworks with family
Sunday naps with Honey,
4th of July spent with new friends from other countries
Freedom
Seeing happiness and joy through other eyes, a joyful Japanese student
Conversations with dear Cousin Raine
Only, growing in confidence, learning independence and responsibilities
Mission trip to Belize for Oldest, paid in full, by hard work for others
Oldest, continuing to work, to help pay for Only's trip to Belize, secretly putting money on her acct.

24 hour jam session

2011-07-10T21:56:00.001-05:00

I'm sure this is not

my first 24 hr. jam session

I would certainly bet,

it won't be my last

but 24 hrs in my jammies

eating only jello, cottage cheese or ice cream

with my roll of toilet paper

(for my nose)

wearing a Breath Right strip

(I've got to breath somehow right?)

fighting chills

fever

*almost worse than "power surges"*

sore throat

achy

sneezing

*no little drawfs here*

and a nose

that would rival

Niagara Falls

I will continue for

yet

another day

Oh yeah,

to make this better yet

Oldest has decided to join me

in this Jam Session

*sigh*

I do not like

~~24 hour~~

~~48 hour~~
week long

Jam Sessions

I'm a little slow, but I'm learning...

2011-07-07T16:22:00.003-05:00

Words fly through my head and I write posts in my head, but yet somehow, they don't make it to blog world. There are times that I want to be so transparent, but yet I'm fearful. Why is that? What am I afraid of? Afraid that someone won't like what I say? Maybe that you won't "get it" like do or I won't make sense and you'll look at me like my kids do. Maybe it's acceptance or worry. So what's the deal? I'll must confess that I've edited, revised, deleted, and revised, and still I wonder...

Am I afraid of what you might find out? That you'll be disappointed or disagree and somehow leave? Kind of silly, but just ask... Go ahead. Ask that question... Yes, I had an abusive father, I was bullied and teased in high school (no this is not why we home educated two of our three), I was a "C" student in college and it's a wonder I got that, I'm sure Youngest inherited his ADHD from me, I can't make myself follow a recipe, I'm a rebel at heart, my prayer life is not what it should be, and please don't ask me for directions for anywhere important. Are you still with me? No, I don't need to see a shrink, my pastor says I'm fine... Really! LOL.

I can zip through a fiction book like I'm breaking the sound barrier, but put a non-fiction book in my hands, and my mind literally goes blank. It takes me a while to process and re-process, take notes, underline, and what ever else it takes for me NOT to forget what I've read and learned. This last March I began reading (oh so slowly), One Thousand Gifts, as well as When a Woman Trusts God, and Sheet Music (I dare you to check this one out). Now if you look at these three books, they don't seem to have anything in common and all is fine, but then I started to reading and guess what?   All three of the books (plus a fiction book) all came to the same subject at the SAME time.

Whoa! Suddenly it's all that pops in front of me - a quote on FB, "Don't you trust me" from Youngest, following through on commitments... Each time Pastor Paul speaks, the message seem to somehow reflect what I had studied that week. God has been using not just His word, but is using all His sources to get it into my fluffy brain. TRUST. Okay God, I get it! You want me to listen, take to heart and live this, right?    Chapters 7-9 of Ann's book stopped me flat out. God's not taking the soft route here, but is constantly reminding, guiding, prodding (probably nudging is more correct), showing, loving, leading...

Ann says "I've to get this thing, what it means to trust, to gut-believe in the good touch of God toward me, because it's true: I can't fill with joy until I learn how to trust:

Romans 15:13: May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

John 6:29 "Jesus answered, “The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent.”

She said the word pisteuo (which is Greek, really I looked it up) is used in the NT (over 248 times according to the 2001 Strongs) and is often translated as "belief" but she also learned that pisteuo ultimately means "to put one's faith in; to trust." To commit to trust. Wow! (pg. 146-7)

"This is the trust I lack: to know that if disaster strikes, He carries me even there." Ann (pg. 148)

"Worry is the warning light that God as been shoved to the sideline. The moment you put Him back at the center, you have peace again." Rick Warren

God never promises to remove us from our struggles. He does promise, however, to change the way we look at them." Max Lucado

John 14:1
The Message: "Don't let this throw you. You trust God, don't you? Trust me."
NIV: “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me."

So, when it comes down to it, through giving thanks for His blessings, (though I may perceive "I" or someone made the bread, sew, ability to play an instrument, cleaned the toilets, picking blueberries, etc), I am learning to count those blessings and that He is the One in Whom I trust. He is the one who gives me these gifts, lovingly when I do not deserve or always appreciate them. And His ultimate gift? What would be your answer as to how God is blessing you? Is Trust easy for you?

Just ask

2011-06-22T17:34:00.001-05:00

Last night,

a sweet friend, Melissa and I

had a girl's night out

just the two of us

Delicious Stuffed Chicken Marsala

We had the best time!!!

Not as two moms,

or as someone's wife

just two good friends

good conversations

delicious food

Want to hear the funny part?

Both of us

share the same wedding anniversaries

June 23

19 years apart

our oldest children are dating
and our daughters are best friends
(it's complicated)

Stay with me...

So I had to ask...

yes, I did!

I asked our server

if we could have a dessert

to celebrate our anniversaries!!!

No, our husbands were not present

Guess what???

This is the yummy celebration dessert we received!

Our celebration dessert

"I don't want to judge..." she started

We had a little explaining to do

We are not married to each other

GASP!

"Our husbands are unavailable to celebrate

One is at boy scout camp and the other doesn't like Italian

It's Girls night out!"

Oh so delicious and rich!

We gave our sweet server an bit more of a tip

took our dessert to Sweet Bay

got a coffee and chai

two forks

and each had two-three bites

more good conversations

two good friends

Ah, we must do it again soon
for we had to go home way too soon.

Dusting off my shoes

2011-06-21T13:23:00.000-05:00

Last week,

the first official day of our 7 weeks of summer break,

I dusted off my running shoes

stretched my unused muscles

(they protested greatly)

and plugged in my moving sidewalk

(this clothing hanger is officially called a treadmill).

Last week I did 8 miles not great,

(please read 8 miles in one week, not in one day, ugh)

but everyday getting faster and better.

I'm ashamed to admit that this last year I allowed stress and adjustments to our family structure stress me and use food as a crutch and I gained those 25 lbs . I worked so hard the last few years to not just lose the extra pounds, but to be healthier, and feel better about myself, and improve my marriage. Although getting up at 5 to go spinning at 5:20 and working out for 3 hrs. a day was helping me to lose the weight and tone up, it was taking it's toll.

Tracking progress: A few years ago I used FitDay, because I need be held accountable, but found SparkPeople easier to use on my phone when I'm out. I like the options of entering data on my phone or on line and it automatically updates. In the past I found that MyFitnessFriends was a wonderful support and encouragement, I probably should head back over there! Slowly, yes slowly, I'm working back towards my goal. I loved being the size I was for years, and it's not really about the specific size or the number on the scale, but it's about how I feel about myself and the role model I am for my kids. I told myself all those years ago that I wouldn't go back to where I had started, but I did.

*Note to self
Do not swing arms when jogging
arm will catch on ear buds connected to phone on which I'm listening to Pandora cardio music because I must then jump over my phone as it falls on treadmill. It easier to attach it to self and avoid such supposed disaster.

** Note to self
Lock cat out of bedroom while walking
she is magically drawn to the moving "play toy"
The last time she tried to join me,
she jumped on the treadmill (which was moving)
I tried to jump out of her fast and unsuccessful use,
landed back on the moving sidewalk,
but I did one of those ungracefull falls off,
which slid me backwards in the blink of an eye.
I had abraisions and bruises on the left side of my poor body
could hardly move for 4 days afterward.
All the videos you see on AFV of people doing the same thing...
It's really not that funny

Gifts of Grace

2011-06-20T07:03:00.000-05:00

Some recent Gifts of Grace

Honey's 21 yrs at the same job
Expensive meds cheaper via generics and insurance
Honey cleaning and organizing the garage.
Protection for Raine's husband when faced with demonic druggie at work
Friend has Stage 0 breast cancer - thankfully they caught it early
Oldest's enrolled in college classes
Oldest's college paid for via Pell Grants and scholarships (we even get $$ back to use for books!!!)
Men who step in to be daddies for those who have lost theirs
Quiet Sunday afternoons
Morning kisses from the kids
Movie night and pizza with family