Assorted Diary of Disorganized Thoughts

Nagesh Kukunoor: Spectrum of Cinema

2013-03-17T15:40:00.001-07:00

I call Nagesh the spectrum of cinema because he goes beyond the visible range, sometimes into unknown measures, which can only be felt and not seen.

When I just heard about a Nagesh Kukunoor’s film not being able to find producer, I was shocked, and felt sad for Bollywood. That man should’ve been the face of new Bollywood. Instead, he’s meandering along the course where he’s bound to be forgotten unless someone supports it. He’ll make it good somewhere, surely the film festival culture has supported good filmmakers, and now, is at its peak. It’s the loss of Bollywood.
wiki/Nagesh_Kukunoor

Let’s start from the start; Bollywood is having a beautiful heir-culture. King’s son becomes king, landlord’s son becomes landlord, farmer’s son becomes farmer, and an actor’s son or director’s son becomes actor or director. Wait, didn’t progress mean freedom of choosing your own profession? The kings have long gone, landlords are almost gone, farmers can’t go anywhere but even their children have a sense of freedom. But actors just meander around thin line, and an actor’s son is qualified to be an actor, if he fails he can try at direction or production.

One of the revolutionaries of movement called Parallel Ciname

Let me tell another story. There was a young boy who dreamed of being a filmmaker. He qualified as an engineer and went to US. Still, the dream didn’t die. He saved money, made a film in 17 lakhs. It got critical acclaim at various film festivals, got rewarded as India’s most successful independent film. It was shot in 17 days straight.

Hyderabad Blues started it. Then he made Rockford. Amazingly, from filming a story of a couple set in Hyderabad which is recognized for use of Hyderabad Urdu correctly for the first time, he moved into a school and hostel, and uncovered the tales of growing students underlying various issues which were hardly ever dealt with before. At places, he was terrifyingly honest in his treatment, yet messages were conveyed in the right way, and not in preachy words.

Shawshank Redemption was then remade into 3 Walls (or 3 Deewarein). When you see this film in isolation, and you don’t know that Nagesh has set up a classic film in Indian circumstances, you won’t know. That’s the style. In his first two films, he’d set himself up as a realist, who showed everything true. In the third, he showed his knowledge and creativity by remaking a masterpiece, and still making a masterpiece only.

3 Deewarein: Remake of Shawshank Redemption

Bollywood Calling was a satire on Bollywood itself. A beautiful satire, it got you thinking, and left a deep message. And it was an entertainer. Thorough entertainer, like Hyderabad Blues, like Rockford, this film carried a message throughout. 3 Walls was something else altogether. Hardly have we had good satires on the insides of Bollywood, and of ageing actors and young actresses and how films are made and egos run films.

Hyderabad Blues 2 came, just a usual sequel. While the first one was when he was getting used to coming back from abroad and finding a girl, the second one focused on issues of marriage. Modern day marriage is beautifully captured. He was going on establishing himself beyond ordinary realistic directors by bringing out films after films capturing reality, yet each different from the other. He lived his life through his films.

Iqbal came, then. Anyone who’s seen it will vouch for it being pure magic. A story so beautifully told. Not preachy, but hiding a message inside as sublime as iron inside our blood. We don’t really know it, but the color is given by it. Shreyas Talpade, an amazing actor, was given a break via this film. The film moved into a village, dealt with Muslim characters never giving any bias to anyone against any religion. Now how many of the films can do it? Also, on cricket, hardly any good films are there. This one just made the cut, being in top 5 sports film in the world according to imdb.

Dor was in every way sequel to Iqbal, bigger, better, and carrying a message and seriousness, uncovering layers of human emotions, handling many issues, yet never compromising on story-telling. It was serious cinema with a hint of satire, realistic humor, and some entertainment provided purely by Shreyas Talpade’s acting genius, in a character which could’ve been called unnecessary by many. The film though, belonged to Ayesha Takia and Gul Panag, and remains there best film till date.

Sorry to break my one paragraph per film rule I’d in evidently set, but Dor deserves more. This is a story of a girl from Himachal, a Muslim, Zeenat. She goes to find Meera, from Rajasthan, a young widow, to help save her husband, who’s given death sentence for Meera’s husband’s murder. The story is believable, and that’s what is heart-warming. The story tackles issue of love marriage, of friendships, between friendship and love, of the status of widows, of various other issues, all embedded in a very fine story.

If you ever wish to test whether you are human or you’ve changed to adapt to practical life, you should watch some very fine emotional films meandering on thin line of realistic emotional expressions in cinematic language. Dor is one of those, where if you don’t feel anything, you aren’t probably human. Editing, cinematography, music, all add to the film. Imaan ka asar and yeh haunsla stay with you.

I don’t really know why Bombay to Bangkok was made. An idea to make a cross-language humorous love story is good; it has been tried and tested. The film wasted talents, most importantly of Nagesh Kukunoor. The film, still better than most of today’s super hit entertainers, is a dark spot on his career.

8X10 Tasveer is another movie which takes another route, just like Nagesh likes. This was one of the under-rated but amazingly well made films. Akshay Kumar did his role very well, was restrained for the role which is superb because of the demand of the role. Ayesha Takia is superb again. Direction is amazing, and it truly has the thrills and pace. Slackening at times, obviously, because of the romance and songs probably.

Aashayein is a through-and-through feel-good film. John Abraham’s best performance along with Water, in both of which, I felt it wasn’t the normal John. The ensemble cast, however, is amazing. A story about a man diagnosed with cancer leaving everything and going to a rehabilitation center. The meaning of life is portrayed through beautiful storytelling involving emotions, and dreams, and impossible reality. Highlights for me were dream sequences involving Indiana Jones. Everybody loves fantasy, and to bring out so innocently and in a believable way takes some skill.

Mod, his last released project, was a beautiful film again. Taking on another serious issue, split personality, and the same theme as Dor: How far will you go to save your love. It’s another amazing concept, and amazingly well told emotions. The only glitch here is editing, for the first 15 minutes do not generate the kind of interest this film should. There are thrills, there are emotional moments, there are beautiful performances. Ranvijay is surprisingly good for his second film and essaying a difficult role. Ayesha Takia is always great when in a Nagesh film.

The moving canvas that Nagesh paints with vivid colors in every film, every film vivid in itself; yet the overall contrast he brings in various films makes you think it isn’t as vivid. Only great actors have essayed different roles in different films, for a director, it’s much more difficult because you do live a life every film and to make it real, you need to paint real emotions. This director is a modern-day genius blessed with amazing sense of emotions and story-telling, and packaged with a technical brilliance that is hard to come by. Add to that, a strange satire in many of his films on the society.

yeh haunsla kaise ruke?

It is this reason which makes me feel it’s not good for Bollywood to lose him out to financial gains. We need to start supporting good films. As for him, he’s made films which splendor us in varying degrees of hope and positivity. He won’t be giving up in what he does best.

His Name is Bhagat Singh, and He’s Not a Terrorist

2013-03-15T07:42:00.001-07:00

Shaheed Bhagat Singh: Selected Speeches and Writings: Book Review/ Rather Book Effect

I always misunderstood one statement from Bhagat Singh which said ‘I am not a terrorist, these means are never successful’. I used it to support Mahatma Gandhi. I was all wrong. While reading this collection of speeches, letters and writings, I realized Bhagat Singh has to be among the most educated freedom fighters we have had. And his statement about terrorism isn’t built on some ideals, it’s about a lot of theoretical and practical knowledge he gained.

What came out very clearly is that the Hindustan Socialist Republican Party had strong opinion about everything, and it had much more solid principals and beliefs than some of the modern day parties. They had well thought of plans and demarcations for everything. And they were extremely clever bunch. Amazingly honest, hardworking, didn’t fear to lay down their lives. But most important, they were practical.

They never believed in getting freedom in a year or so, Bhagat Singh in one of the addresses mentioned that as impossible, and a daydream. He had mentioned about a struggle for about twenty years.

Originally, he was part of Gandhiji’s Non-Co-operation Movement. He supported it completely. Then, when on some instances of violence Gandhiji decided to call-off the movement. Before continuing it, I do have two questions a)does one person, as a leader, has right to rule over a movement of lakhs of people whether or not they want to continue it or not b)does 95% or 90% success doesn’t amount to success? If only perfect things were accepted, we wouldn’t have any invention. Probably no human either, babies will have to be killed on birth because they’re not perfect.

There is a clause in the manifesto of Hindustan Republican Party, Right to Recall, something we’re discussing even now. Bhagat Singh believed mental labor and manual labor be judged equally, wasn’t happy with plight of farmers, laborers, with the situation of education etc. We have all these problems even today. Much worse than before. Might be a blasphemous thought, but had Bhagat Singh got equal popularity as a Gandhi, and had Gandhiji got death sentence, India might have been better, more practical.

Mahatma Gandhi was an idealist. Shaheed Bhagat Singh, and Hindustan Socialist Republican Party were practical. Probably biased towards Socialist, but even socialist would’ve been good for today.

Anyway, coming back to Shaheed Bhagat Singh, all he committed was one murder, and no other real crime. His letters to the British weren’t considered probably because they didn’t understand the argument, and the sarcasm, and even though English was their language, they had someone making a mockery of them in their language. Pen is mightier than sword, even in case of Shaheed Bhagat Singh.

I feel saddened by the loss of four books that Bhagat Singh wrote, and were lost. I am thankful for the collection brought along, and at a very nominal price. It cleared many conceptions, made me a fan of Shaheed Bhagat Singh, an amazing icon for education, despite his death at the age of 23. That is education, when you acquire an amazing knowledge of the history of your field of expertise, awareness of happenings around the world, and your own practical inputs.

The Chapter

2013-03-15T06:36:00.000-07:00

While reading one of the short-story collections, I was moved with one story a lot. It made me laugh, it made me smile, and it made me feel amazing. By the end of it though, I felt so bad I literally hated the world. I didn’t hate the world in real; I was just not in the world. I was in the story. After that, the next couple of stories I read but hardly registered.

It took time; ultimately I got over the feeling. That chapter was where I lived a life. But frankly, that chapter is just a part of an overall book. It’s not even the last chapter.

Sometimes in the midst of life, some phase makes us believe that this is life, and this is how we want it to go on. Like in a story, we plan how it’ll end. In the end, we don’t know how it’ll go, so all the attempts at going ahead of the word you’re reading are futile, any association more than the current moment is dangerous.

Sometimes, the previous story and the next have no relation at all. In life, focus can only be on the current word because it’s pretty wide. If you try to take whole of it into picture, you can’t do well for yourself.

Himesh Reshamiya: Life Comes Full Circle: A Tribute Part 1

2012-11-19T13:24:00.001-08:00

Whatever the critics and hates may say, they can't claim to have done half as much hardwork as HR has done and is still doing.

He had started his career producing serials at the age of 16, Andaz being the most famous. He's back now producing a big-budget film Khiladi 786, along with a couple of others. Now almost 40, this guy has been working endlessly in mainstream from last 23 years or so, and since he produced those serials at that age, surely, from much before that.

Himesh Reshamiya, one of the most popular, most famous, most criticized and most hated music composers is a reason for inspiration. He made serials, composed for them to get into music. Born to a composer Vipin Reshamiya, who was the first to introduce electrical instruments in India and has worked with legendary musicians like R.D.Burman, Laxmikant-Pyarelal and Shankar-Jaikishan, and Madhu Reshamiya, he had keep ears for music. His father had narrated in a musical show how he'd be listening and enjoying the music and suddenly stopping and listening attentively whenever his instruments were playing.

Here's his song from the serial Andaz

Apparently, he had close relations with Salman Khan, and his friendship reflects in the first few breaks he'd got in industry. His first song came in the Salman Khan-Kajol starrer Pyaar Kiya toh Darna Kya, it was a beautiful title song crooned by Kumar Sanu and Alka Yagnik and written by Sameer. The sound of the song is so pure, so fresh. Melody has been his strongest point, and it's evident from this song. After a series of chunari songs, he was also given the title of Chunariya-expert. Enjoy this song, truly beautiful:

He gave many songs, many songs for pure entertainment films. But there were always some songs that were so beautiful it was hard to ignore. One of them, which mesmerizes me with it's lyrics 'sarki jo sar se woh dheere dheere, paagal hua re main dheere dheere', somehow this song strikes a chord. One of the amazing features of his songs was they managed to be popular despite being old school.

Here's the link to song teri chunariya

Sonu Nigam has been my favorite singer, and the best singer we have according to many biased and unbiased music fans. Himesh and Sonu have churned out a good number of very beautiful songs. Before Kaheen Pyaar Naa Ho Jaaye also they have worked together, but the first real good song came in this film, hear how beautiful this composition titled 'Pardesi... Maine Mohabbat Karli Karli' is:

in India, there is a big problem of typecast. While he'd not got as much recognition for his beautiful songs deeply rooted into Indianness, he got a lot of films requiring entertainment songs, specially with films like Aabra ka Daabra, Tarzan, Hello Brother, yet he had the ability to impress. If I'd been hearing him during those days, I'd have said this guy has a big potention. Though what made him his fan was obviously his first real solo success as a music director, even though music of Kaheen Pyaar Naa Ho Jaaye was fairly successful.

One of his songs, probably first out-an-out pacy number, is still popular. From the film Kya Dil Ne Kaha, song titled Nikamma, sung by Shaan, with whom he is still working and has many hits, and Sanjivani. I still find hint of beautiful melody in this song, usually missing in fast songs.

Wasn't able to find a better link, here's the song link however:

Humraaz brought him his first Filmfare nomination. It had beautiful songs mostly, and to choose one is really unfair. I'd go with song 'Bardaasht Nahi Kar Sakta' sung by KK in a way only he could, this song has various elements. Other noteworthy songs in the album are 'sanam mere humraaz', the music of which he'd used in the title songs of his serials Andaz and Amar Prem, a beautiful composition nevertheless. Here's the song 'Bardaasht' :

There were some good songs in between, a couple being very popular. But let's move on to Tere Naam. The film got him Filmfare nomination, a Screen award and a Zee Cine award. There is not one song that I'd like to skip from the movie. Whether it is the beautiful title song Tere Naam Humne Kiya Hai, or the sad song Kyun Kisi Ko, the romantic number Tumse Milna Baatein Karna, a little pacy song O Jaana, devotional Man Basia. Despite a couple of good albums doing decent work, this was the film that Himesh Reshamiya truly needed, the only glitch being a couple of very good songs composed not by him but by Sajid-Wajid. Incidently, this film also marked a comeback-of-sorts of Salman Khan and was rumored to be based on his one famous love story.

I remember him talking about the songs of this film in a show, and telling that he's been a fan of Laxmikant-Pyarelal and is literally earning his bread through their songs. Without his telling one could've found the connection. The Indian touch, the soft on ear songs, the beautiful melody, even with the faster numbers, the use of instruments, he was on the right path and Tere Naam was the fruit of his slavery. Here's the song 'Kyun Kisi Ko' from the film:

After this, 11films carried his name in credits in the year 2004. One of my favorite films, Bardaasht, carried only 5 songs, a very rare feature even though in mid-2000s, yet the songs were all beautiful, and very good. One of the songs, janaabe ali, was very popular. Even if you listen to this song now, you'll fall in love with it. It's an out and out fast song, one of the first songs of Kunal Ganjawala and Himesh together. It came in the same year as Bheege Hont Tere. The song also features Shaan.

To be continued...

Vayu Rakshak: A 3D Short Promo Dedicated to IAF

2012-06-09T05:15:00.000-07:00

Joint Work by me and Mayank Sharma. :-)

Rafale B Flying Still

2012-03-18T16:29:00.002-07:00

Maya 2010 and Photoshop used.

Tata Photon Plus: A User Review

2012-01-25T07:39:00.000-08:00

Spoiler: You Might Not Want to Buy One After Reading This.
Short Two World Summary: It's Shit.
I type an address, I hit enter. I wait for 5 minutes. I take out my mobile. I type the address, hit enter. In 5 seconds, the page opens. I see the computer screen. Still loading with a blank white page in front. That's power of Tata Photon. Get Speed within yourself to find options. Get Time for other things, it'll be forever loading. That's not the only problem with Tata Photon however.
Let's start with the start. I got Tata Photon installed. Till the time they came asking money and giving device, they were calling continuously. The person who came promised he'll deliver gift coupons that are supposed to be given with the device. Forward two weeks, a couple of complaints. A week later, I get to know that I wasn't supposed to get anything like that because I hadn't preserved the sms/hadn't been given anything in written. Please note therefore, if Tata Photon or any people related promise anything, ask them to write it down with date and time, there signature, name and check their id, note the details.

Fine, I move on. While the first 5GB are on, I'm supposed to get 3.1MBPS. The disclaimer says UPTO. Means I never really got even 2 MBPS. After the 5 GB, I am supposed to get 155 KBPS. I am frequently getting lesser speed, but it's manageable so I don't complain. A couple of months later, when it gets unbearably low, I file a complaint. I get no response. They say they will charge 150 Rupees for coming. To note here is that they charge around 900-950 Rupees a month. Now after charing 950, they're again on begging terms. Don't they deserve to shut down shop because they can't afford the engineers to solve customer's problems?

I manage somehow. Things get really out of hand when I am unable to do anything. I open speedtest.net. I get a message 'for your speed, try modile speedtes'. Amazing. I try other speed test. I get 20KBPS. It puts me just above one Dial-up speed and below two Dial-up speeds. I complain. Again they say 150 Rupees. I say Disconnect. A couple of days later, I get a call that I'll get 15GB instead of 5GB of High Speed usage. I feel okay let's continue. A couple of days later, I again ask for disconnection. Let me point reasons.

When I asked from when will this 15 GB be applicable?
Ans: From your next billing cycle, that is 26th.
P.S. It again means they don't have any means to solve problems, just trying to offer a bigger plan.

When I asked is this unlimited plan adn again the speed will be ridiculously low after high speed usage...
Ans: They said it's limited to 15GB after which I'll be charged. I get told you anyway use only 7-8 GB maximum.
P.S. I was using this low because after 5 GB, the 155 KBPS they offered was ridiculously low that it was hard to use. If I used 8, it only means I have huge amount of patience. Also, I remember not using any heavy stuff, even youtube excessively because I was afraid that 5 GB may get over anytime.

When I asked: My Account is still not working after 5-6 months of Tata and innumerable complaints...
Ans: They first said you can't do anything and then said you need to send an e-mail.
P.S. In a limited account, you need to be able to check My Account to know usage. And I have already sent dozens of e-mails.

Attaching some interesting speed test screenshots that any modern day service provider will feel ashamed of. Please Note beforehand, they are separately carried, done with only a single internet/download process active at a time.

TechCular: A Promising Technology Blog for an Advancing Country

2012-01-05T23:40:00.000-08:00

Today is the day when we've got a 1200 Rs tablet PC available offering Android and Touch Screen, sponsored by Govt. Another side, we've people who love to buy high-end gadgets. Almost everyone has a Desktop or a Laptop, or have to use one in their office. The time is technologically ripe. With so many options, we do have so many decisions to make and also so many problems coming daily. A machine will always give a problem, and whether it is Android or Mac or Windows, or even an Office Suit, we're bound to get some. And there's a never-ending feeling if we're making full use of our multi-purpose device and not making it work the way our brain does, only 5 percent or so?
Thankfully, there are some places where we can find solutions to problems, and tips to do more with our devices. When you open Techcular.com, you see a simple interface, with the first post generally being a sticky one, with the giveaway of the month. We'll talk about that later. The next ten posts are the latest offering from Techcular, blog entries about the latest the technology has to offer you. Then you get the option to browse through next few pages, reading the posts in chronological order. It's the trend of the day, latest is always the first. No complaints there, in fact it's the simplicity of use that I was amazed with.
There is a button with endless possibilities on the top right corner, opposite to the Techcular logo and name on the top-left corner. It is called Google Custom Search. I love it the most because I can't be sure whether what I'm searching is on the first page of even first 5 pages or so. I type what I'm looking for, and within milliseconds, Mr. Google gives me what I want, like magic. Obviously, it has been posted there before, that's why it appears. Also, a blog like Techcular has innumerable posts and hence to find the one you're looking for is not as simple as ABC. With Google Custom Search, thankfully, it is as easy.
Above the name and the logo are four pagelinks visible in almost every website, and frankly, very important. The first one says 'About Us', You already know what it does. In addition to the background, it also helps you find Techcular and the chief editor, Soumya Pratihari, on various social platforms. Archives provides an easy bulletted interface to finding posts in a particular month or by a particular author. Privacy Policy is, frankly, what very few read, neither did I. Contact Us option gives an easy interface to send feedback, suggestion, or queries.
Below the line featuring logo and name, and the Google Custom Search, is the headings, the taglines used to separate the articles, or group them nicely. IPHONE, Mac, Android, Gadgets, Telecom, Internet, Technology, Computer, Softwares, Gaming, Giveaways. The last one is the best obviously, but with these easy options, you don't know need to worry about finding the right column, although I'd still prefer Mr. Google if my requirement isn't on first page.
Now a couple of mistakes/things not done perfectly. First of all, I am always amazed why people use the term Softwares. It's not a term. Software in itself is plural, as well as singular, depending on requirement. Softwares is not a dictionary term, only Software is. Second, while writing this review, I found the first two posts under Softwares catered to Mobile Phones, an LG on top followed by Samsung. In Gaming, at the time of writing, top post was Canon Camcorder. The other columns are fine.
Now the main point, the Giveaways. That's what gets us charged up. I missed winning a Samsung laptop, giving a go at this one. However, it's great to be able to win something by spending some time over the internet, probably the one which I waste in facebook. I won Aakash Tablet recently, in fact got to know just yesteray from another blog PriceIndia.org from the same man. And hopefully, I'll make a debut in Amazon buying soon. Though whether or not I win, I know where to go when my Aakash Tablet arrives and I wish to do more with it. This is the place.

Techcular.Com: For all Gadget Related Queries.

2011-12-06T00:59:00.000-08:00

We love gadgets, but while buying them, we need careful analysis. A thing once bought is outs, and most of us can't afford to buy it one more time. Thankfully, I found a site which helps me make my choices. Techcular.com, it's a wonderful site. do check it out.

PriceIndia.Org : Before You Buy Check Over It.

2011-11-18T01:28:00.000-08:00

Because of the online shopping becoming huge, the people in the physical market overpricing by loads depending on the condition in the area, there are often chances of paying more than one should do if the trade is honestly done.
There is now a website, thankfully which can help you get the right prices so that before buying you know the approximate costs and don't end up paying too much extra.
Another interesting website, Techcular.com, is a technology blog for gadget freaks, like me.

Enjoy the sites :)

My Experiments with GM Diet for Vegans : Day 1

2011-08-16T07:13:00.000-07:00

Dieting is a commonly misused term. When someone says 'I'm on a diet', it is equated 'I'm not eating anything'. On the other hand, diet is an excellent way of self-management where you are getting disciplined by eating only the foods good for your body. Dieting is good, in short.
GM Diet for Vegans, or the General Motors Diet for the Vegetarians is a vegetarian-variant of a famous 7-day diet schedule which makes you lighter by around 5 kgs and cleanses your system in a week. It sounds magical, but well when you get down the path you know it's not magic but hardwork.
Especially staying in Delhi, Kamla Nagar and not eating anything other than fruits is a punishment of sorts. Yes, that's what the diet said.
Day 1: Fruits and Water. The most difficult thing was that there were no bananas. And in the end I realized, it wasn't what I missed that hurt. It was what I ate. Especially concerning was Water-melon. Half a water-melon took an hour to finish and after eating I still felt hungry. Apples and water melon along with water consisted the diet mainly. Felt lighter, but because I was always hungry.
P.S. I didn't use weighing machine before the start just to test my overall feel during the diet. Weight-loss was secondary. I was more inclined towards the positivity it's supposed to bring because the digestive system gets cleaned. If weight-loss is there, it'll be automatically felt I believe.
My Experiments with GM Diet for Vegans: Day 2, see you tomorrow...
Till then, keep eating. And keep yourself in check so that you don't ever need drastic measures.

Love: Eternal and Impossible

2011-06-10T11:26:00.000-07:00

The article talks about love as in a relationship emphasizing one true love for life.

Gone are the times when we'd do anything to retain our partner

Before moving on to relationships let's ask some questions to our honest self and review our situations.
1)Did we ever feel the need to change our family despite arguments or fights for permanent? Children may want to separate from parents but that's a different issue. What I want to emphasize is did we ever want another set of parents? Obviously wishful thinking is different but exchange the mother of a one-year-old and see how he reacts. Similarly, take away a one-year-old from parents, especially mother, and see how they react. Talking about that time because the love then is of the purest form, not diluted by other factors. We didn't need another mother of father, we may think of staying away from them but won't want them replaced. Forget the scripted shows, talk reality, an honest question to yourself.

2)Would you consider going and living permanently in a different country? Those who make the decisions have some factors. And from what I've seen, there is a longing for home forever.

3)When people are sad, what they do is curl themselves into the shape they are as a fetus, just to try and inverse the process and go back to their origin.

Now coming to the point, we don't want to change things unless very important, be it the old home we live in. We try and get it fixed again and again, get rebuild unless we're forced to shift. And most humans come back to their natives even then, or when going around the place remember there was the house where I lived many a great memories.

The point is, why do we so easily give up the person we'd sometimes dreamed to live the life with? The bond with person is greater because it's not a blood relation and still you imagine getting old with that person. The questions has become even greater today with frequent break-ups, pre-marital affairs, post-marital affairs, divorces, live-ins, etc. If we don't need more than one mother, more than one father, then why do we come to realize we need more than one partner?

The simple answer is, the common frailty, quantity is better than quality. Though it takes a second to remove any doubts. A one-year old will have very few wants, mostly food and sleep. When he gets them, he's happy. When he doesn't, he's sad. It's not that the baby won't have anything else, but anything will do and not a particular thing. A 25-year old on the other hand has multiple wants. He gets them, he wants more. He doesn't get them, he wants them more. In both cases, he's not happy or content for long.

Also, the thing is, with parents we know we'll have them whatever we do and we can't have another set. Having a partner, we always have loved this saying 'tu nahi toh koi aur sahi, aur nahi toh koi aur sahi' meaning if not you, someone else, and so on. It's basically for those who aren't successful in love, and not for those who like to want more than they have.

There are also great people who, have one single person who they will have for life, but will still keep searching for others for pleasure. For them, there's nothing to say really. They've been wronged by a cultural shift but just one thing, if you ever love someone truly and would like to give up everything for that person, you'll remember what all you did and you'll probably be thinking the same is true for the other person as the demon is in your mind. There's an interesting forward sms too regarding that.

It could also be attributed to the tensions and depression. Today, everyone is in depression, so how will they solve the problem of their partner? When the sky is blue, they have a great time, but when sun starts to rise, they go back in search of shade. It's an attitude problem. We are the generation who'll call themselves the problem solvers, and can do anything for the friends is what we say. But we can't constantly go on with a nagging partner all our life, or even an year or two for that matter. And it's not depression we blame. It's the ease of getting away with anything after having made the best use already according to us.

So what is the solution? I don't know. I guess if you love your partner enough, you'll not need anyone else in life for that position. The solution is too simple to really apply that we forget and search for complex solutions.

Render with Ambient Occlusion, MY First Model (Barring Hands)

2011-06-05T02:38:00.000-07:00

Spidy B-)

Pausing Live Video

2011-05-31T11:20:00.000-07:00

This thought stings me, how come you advertise about pausing live video? If it's paused, it isn't live, as simple as that. It's a weird world where to make things simpler people make so many mistakes.They could've said it in a better way, probably pause what you watch, resume when you're free to watch again or something.
Actually, first part may be right, instantaneously, pausing the video you're pausing is actually live only. But the next instant, reality changes.
Life runs like this, there is no pause button, the moment you put it on pause, you're behind others. Make sure you utilize your time wisely.
P.S.: Even taking a rest may be utilization of time.

The Butt, rather the Ass of all Jokes

2011-05-25T17:04:00.001-07:00

In the school, we had a one-liner on the decorated posters which I used to accept during those times but I do feel about it now. It said 'a day as a lion is far far better than hundred days as a deer'. Why, I say?

For me, Lion stands for brutality. Deer stands for beauty. We often say 'thing of beauty is a joy forever', yet we choose brutality, fierceness. That is because we do want to have that attitude, that hunger. But aren't we over-doing attitude thing? I mean we learned metaphors on a beautiful life, and we never talked of lion. And according to science, food chain and food web and balance etc, all are equally important to the overall existence and well-being. Yet we like one thing, choose quite another.

Let's discuss the life of a lion, what metaphors will it hold? Brave, fierce, competitive, brutal? He would be what Boman Irani describes in 3 Idiots. Deer on the other hand, a beautiful runner, fast but second to predator only. We don't want to come second then. Is it? Because it's not supposed to be an article dictating views, I'll leave this point open.

There's another thing that keeps me thinking, we always want and expect hard-work. And we don't use donkey in a good way. In fact it is always joked upon by us. Is it because donkey doesn't have a brain and keeps doing the same things for humans? Then do lions have brains? Would they attack if they weren't hungry? They will die if they don't kill, simple as that. So what's with killing as brave and fierce? Isn't it all a perception in the end?

Everyone who is a lion today has been a donkey at some stage consistently, and still is probably if he is managing those levels. And everyone would like to be remembered for some form of beauty too. So one can't rule our deer either.

What I feel at the end of the day, attitude, passion, talent, etc, all these traits aren't really what determine anything. It's the human trait that determines. Each human is innately different from each other. Being human is about being natural, and you can learn the skills only because your abilities reach your pinnacle during that period of learning and you continue the path of learning all through the life. It's nothing less, nothing more.

TO the Fortress, FOR Rahul Dravid, Carried BY the Madness

2011-05-21T00:44:00.000-07:00

A shortened trip to watch a cricket match in temperatures soaring at 40 degrees and above, it might be called madness. But we had our reasons, and we enjoyed it, specially with a great company and terrific hosts. Here's the details if you wish to catch the enjoyment we had.

A guy doing an IT job using up more than his weekend, a job-hunting guy giving his Saturday interview a miss, a recently-turned 18 going out for first time with people other than family, and another guy who had his minds on various things, all went for the small 2-day trip basically for the match, and Jaipur sight-seeing as a secondary option. Sight-seeing can be thought as double meaning, especially with an all-boys gang.

We did what we went for right from the start, we had fun. Right from the time we met at Kashmere Gate (sans-Kichu), and enjoyed. It wasn't an easy thing to do, with heat catching up. While on our way, two of us slept, Santosh less though, and two others didn't at all. Part of what we discussed is when we can talk about anything any time, why do we use women as a synonym of gossip? Wait, may be we were discussing it while coming back. Doesn't matter, we did, and there's a point.

We reached there, booked a hotel after a lot of hard-work because there was an AIEEE exam scheduled and hotels were mostly full. Santosh left for home, and all the others gave an attempt at sleeping. Most did this time. In fact, it was difficult to wake Aman up from the dreams of Amani. I can claim to have heard him say see you later, love you, etc.

Santosh finally came with his friend Amit. He got his car down, drove for us and had it not been for him we would have been burning in Jaipur. He had actually left an important relative at home just to be with us. Brilliant work I'd say, finally someone gave me importance, albeit because of Santosh. He is a brilliant guy, I don't mean Santosh but Amit. You can't call someone brilliant if you know them for too long, can you? We had brilliant kachori when we got ready. Then it was about roaming around. Amer Fort, where I took a long route, I was alone in fact clicking pictures and walking up under the fury of the sun who was angry probably because I tried to touch it. I didn't really, but misunderstandings always rule the world. Amer Fort is beautiful. The walk alone was interesting, would have liked to go farther to the other forts but when I came back I wasn't in position, and Aman fell ill due to his nocturnal habits mostly. It was his sleep time, the main problem. We entered the insides, took pictures. It was brilliant. Specially to be taking pictures before we actually saw bats. And we ran away. I was always the last one left for the pictures. Sad, who clicks the photographer? Probably someone does if photographer is a female.

From Amer Fort, we headed for Jantar Mantar. It was something you'd like to visit under enthusiasm when you've score an 80 or 90-odd in Science in Xth standard and taken up Sciences for the Senior Secondary and dreaming to be an engineer or a scientist. For most, reality falls early, and in last few years, even the IT fell before reality. Anyway we were enthusiastic anyway. Checked the sun clock which was working fine. Took some pictures, the most beautiful place I found worth taking pictures, later I found, was a toilet. Amazing where toilets are more beautiful than equipments.

We saw Hawa Mahal from outside. It's not bad really, a good architectural piece. Later, we headed back to hotel, and then a bit of rest, and we went to Chaunki Dhaani, a heaven! It's a place I had visited a month prior to this, had loved it. This time, loved it even more. What atmosphere, what serenity. The lighting, the atmosphere, the brilliance of it all, the food, the service, everything was fantabulous. The other three forgot to thank me for forcing them to come there because it would've been cancelled but it's a thankless world really. I mean these guys thank their girlfriends thousands times a day for nothing really, and a friend? Isn't a friend to be taken for granted. Well well. I would've minded if I didn't enjoy it. I loved it. The food was the highlight, a great food, whose one plate would be enough for a family without any extra serving on a normal day, but that day, even Aman finished one-fourth of it who usually gives ants a competition. I had the lion's share. Finished almost everything till my stomach reminded me if I didn't have mercy on it, it'll not have any during the match tomorrow. I had to give up. The cruel stomach still cause problems. We topped the brilliant Rajasthani thali with a couple of Punjabi dishes with a kulfi. Kichu had been wanting kulfi all day so it was but natural that we have it. We had it, we loved it again. Santosh and Kichu went to the dance floor just because there were so many of the girls. I had the best seat, a camera in hand, to supposedly click those two. I just kept on clicking and clicking, a wider frame and tried my best to skip those two and capture everything else. One of those days when you need concentration to succeed and who will have the concentration to click in such situations? Ended with a paan, which was brilliant again. Later, at the room, I managed to finish a cold drink again. A match made in heaven I'd say, cold-drink and me. Roaming around at midnight to search for cold drinks, what else can one say? Obviously others wanted water and that could've waited.

The next day, the big day, the match day. Santosh tried it hard to keep the emergencies coming in so that we do feel like missing the real deal. I bought the Rajasthan Royals t-shirt, Santosh also ghost-bought it. We were with his cousin, we went to Puma store to get the tees, then to a mall which was more of a market and all hopes of getting under the ac went under drains, rather under sun! Would you believe, sun was still angry that I challenged it to go farther than it has ever been? The best thing in the market was the BRRR campaigne. I mean the girl who was presenting it. Coke given inside was chilled, super-chilled, and was therefore brilliant. I gave it a shot, and being the perfectionist I am, couldn't clear it up without any rehearsal and in the two shots they gave me. No respect for their brand ambassador Aamir Khan who wouldn't have cleared a difficult brrr stunt in 10 shots with proper rehearsal. Oh well, life isn't fair always, is it? Anyway for the coke of it, it was fun.

Then came Santosh, and went again for booking tickets. Finally he came, and me and Santosh stripped in public. I mean we changed t-shirts to show our love for Rajasthan Royals. It was one of those days when I'd have done without the slight obesity. But well, thankfully only our group was watching, and it's good not to be liked by boys for your body. Santosh had no such problems. He's a semi-skeleton after all. For the match, along with us four were Santosh's cousin Manoj and friend Ramavtar. They were great hosts, I'd bet better than Santosh. Well sorry Manoj and Ramavtar, that wasn't even a comparison. Anyway.

Off to match, the security guards tried there best to make people turn back and go home so that they could watch all alone. We didn't. I held on to the poster we had made for Rahul Dravid despite them telling it's not allowed. I held on, and kept it open almost all the match, till Dravid got out probably. The match was brilliant. Dravid was batting well before Watson stole the show with a wicket maiden and from then things turned backwards till Menaria came. Earlier in the day, Uthappa got out four times to Warne, while the umpire was sleeping in the first over where three weren't legally out as per umpire, Warnie changed ends and finally got him out the fourth time. For the record, Uthappa got some 4-5 boundaries of Warne. Well well. Coming back to batting. Menaria is brilliant, and before Taylor if was him who gave the impetus to victory. Taylor finished it off with the classy Rahane who seemed to be wasted lower down, as he later proved to. Santosh had left mid-game, continuing the practices from the manual of good hosts authored by Ricky Ponting, with contributions from Andrew Symonds, Michael Clarke and Mathhew Hayden. Ramavtar came back after dropping him and we went to hotel, clicked a few pictures, and had a brilliant dinner. Then going to the bus station, we took the bus.

It's interesting how lovely the ride can be when you're not comfortable. Because you can't sleep obviously. You know you have to talk. I was listening to the fast and full bass songs trying to sleep because that's how I sleep with the aide of music. Aman tried his best and I guess he failed. That's why he started talking to me, probably only the best thing after sitting silently in an uncomfortable bus. We managed to wake Kichu up. Actually Aman managed to, his brilliant idea. He told Kichu if he wanted to learn Punjabi songs now. Obviously, Kichu's heart goes out to Punjabi and so it was really no question of no. He was, for the first time in our trip, physically and mentally both present (other than the match) because he was either sleeping or on phone for the rest of the trip. He messaged someone 'kinna sona tennu rab ne banaya' and was last seen checking his cellphone ten times a second while we were leaving. There was no reply, obviously not everyone stays awake at night in the matters of heart. I had the last cold drink of the trip around 2 am. It was good to be back home finally.