Attitude and Longitude

Breaking free from the prisons of perceptions

2009-11-03T07:58:35-06:00

There is nothing so confining as the prisons of our own perceptions. –William Shakespeare

Maybe it’s as simple as consenting to watch a television program your teenager likes – at first you think the program is silly, but then you see why she values it and then so do you.

Maybe it happens when you’re looking for a new job because yours has been eliminated and at first you don’t want to take that great job which will require a hour-long (or longer) commute, but you do it because it’s better than waiting for the economy to rebound next year.

Maybe you encounter it when your childhood-influenced prejudice falls away after interacting with the special terrific-ness of someone you never imagined you would admire and respect.

Maybe it’s a subtle kind of thing that comes upon you as you move through life, like when you find yourself understanding someone you’ve known for many years by seeing things in a way you never have before... from their perspective.

Whatever it is, whenever it is, breaking free from the prisons of perceptions can shift a troubled moment into one of peace and joy. I find this a suitable motivation, don’t you?

The Art of Finding a Career You Love requires a whole-brained, balanced approach

2009-10-28T08:45:55-05:00

I’m excited about the tele-coaching coaching session that my partner, Jay Markunas, and are teaming up to do together tonight. The synchronistic way that it’s all come together still amazes me. It’s got us wondering if we should perhaps offer this as an ongoing monthly program. We’ll have to see!

This idea, which we’re calling “The Art of Finding a Career You Love,” came to us without us having to wrack our brains very much. It kind of seized us and said, “Hey, there... listen up.”

When something finds me like this versus when I deliberately go looking for it, I think it’s especially fun to ponder the meaning. Call it the philosopher in me, call it the spiritual seeker in me, call it the poet/intellectual in me.... but I love to see the connecting points and meanings in events, as well as in the words we use. Interestingly, this is probably one of the qualities that allows me to be so helpful to others who enage my coaching services.

So yesterday I was wondering why in heck did Jay and I decide to call this coaching program, “The Art of Finding a Job You Love” – specifically, why is it the ART of...? I mean, we didn’t really think about it – it just came to us as a package deal. It said, “This is what you’re going to do and this is what it’s called.”

Some thoughts that occurred to me:

Art, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder, or in other words, each of us has a unique perspective. What appeals to one person may not appeal to another. One of my friends thinks Andy Warhol’s “32 Campbell’s Soup Cans” is not art at all – his idea of art (as is most people’s) would be Michelangelo’s work on the Sistine Chapel. Like our tastes in art, our career choices are uniquely individual.

actively

Interestingly, our tele-coaching session tonight will be about the art of finding a career you love by accessing both brain hemispheres. When we ask someone to fill out a 14-page worksheet filled with questions designed to pull out information that the right brain knows but the left brain might not be aware of (e.g. questions that access what one is passion about... what one loves to do), this is where the leaps forward begin. When we ask that person to summarize, analyze the answers to these questions, as well as the results of a DISC assessment, we are taking information that the right brain so graciously provided so the left brain can make sense of it and apply it to the outer world. This where the leaps forward really kick in!

So my ponderings have led me to see that “The Art of Finding a Career You Love” is really about passion AND research, which is a whole-brained, balanced approach. That’s fine by me – I adore the balanced approach!

Are you doing the work that was born in you?

2009-10-21T08:34:44-05:00

No man is born into the world whose work is not born with him.
-James Russell Lowell

A few months ago, a woman at one my workshops was stumped with a series of questions during the group-sharing portion of the module.  The answer to these questions would reveal her childhood gifts and early interests, which would point the way to her work and the way she would do her her work in the world.

As the group continued through the other exercises (our intention was that each attendee walk away with an idea of their personal mission or purpose), this woman, a middle-school administrator, raised her hand. When I acknowledged her, she excitedly told us that she'd figured out her answer and wanted to share her it.  Her enthusiasm was palpable, so even though we'd moved on to the next module, I encouraged her to tell us about her breakthrough.

"Well," she began, "when I was a kid, I loved watching the Jerry Lewis Telethon. You know, Jerry's kids? Raising money for muscular dystrophy?"

We all nodded, and she continued, "You asked us to think about what we wanted to be when we grew up, and I couldn't think of anything at first. Then I remembered how I dreamed of being that little girl who held the basket during the telethon. I wanted to do it so much that I would go around the neighborhood, getting all my friends together, and we'd have our own Jerry's Kids fundraisers.  I was only 9 at the time, but I see how this is still what I do to this day. Organizing activities to help kids is still part of my work today!"

It's funny to me now that when I was a teenager, I had a pin button that said, "Work is a 4-letter word." Hey, wearing pin buttons were a fad when I was in high school, what can I say? Anyway, today I think about that phrase and realize that when we do our work - I mean our real work, the work that was born in us, as James Russell Lowell so wisely points out - it doesn't feel like the 4-letter word my button implied. Instead if feels like play (a much better 4-letter word!) and fun. It feels natural, so natural that we are compelled to do the work. If we deny ourselves the chance to do our work, we become mis-aligned, out of sorts, depressed, unhappy, angry, etc.

So, are you doing the work you love - the work that was born in you?

Another "Act of Kindness" Sighting

2009-10-19T08:26:21-05:00

My faith in humanity's capacity for compassion and gratitude was reinforced yesterday when I witnessed an act of kindness. It was a lovely day, temps in the 70's, bright blue skies, beautifully sunny. My friends and I met for lunch at one of Austin's best-known places to enjoy a good meal outdoors... Shady Grove on Barton Springs Road. We weren't the only ones with this idea - the restaurant was packed!

Naturally, after we were seated the waiter left to fetch our drinks, giving us a few minutes to look over the menu. He delivered our drinks, telling us that he'd be back in a minute, and moved a few steps over to the table next to us where 6 or 7 young men dressed in digi camo were enjoying their meals.  Before my friends and I could resume our small talk, we heard the waiter say to the soldiers, "Just wanted to let you guys know that your bill's been taken care of by that man sitting over there."

One of the young men (and I mean young... they all looked to be about 19 or 20 years old) asked, "Which man, is it the one over there in orange and blue?" When the waiter said yes, the young soldiers all rose immediately and walked over to the table where this man and his family (consisting of two little kids and his wife) were getting up to leave after paying their own tab. To a man, they shook his hand, saying thank you before going back through the busy restaurant to their table.

After witnessing this awesome moment, I went back to the conversation with my friends. What an gracious act of kindness, I thought. Not only to do it in the first place but to pick up what must have easily been a $90+ meal for those soldiers. Later, as the young men stood up and started to leave, an older woman, probably in her late 40's, came over and boldly looked each one in the eye and thanked them for their service.  I couldn't miss this display as it happened right next to our table.  They politely accepted her comments, donned their black berets and filed out of the restaurant. My patriotic heart was singing, but even more than that I was proud of my fellow civilians for unabashedly showing their gratitude for those who serve and defend our freedom.

After telling my husband this story, he showed me the website for The Gratitude Campaign. This site has a short video encouraging and showing how to make a hand sign to express "thank you from the bottom of my heart" as a way to thank members of our military when you see them in public.   American Sign Language starts the sign for thank you from the chin, but, apparently, the original sign, started at the heart, as shown on this website.

Now I have a way to show them my gratitude next time too. In the meantime... To all of the members of our military, active or inactive, thank you from the bottom of my heart!

For an extra degree of personal motivation, watch this!

2009-10-16T08:01:13-05:00

The link to this video (see below) is buzzing around my local community. I saw it courtesy of Launch Pad Job Club member, Lynn Wilson, who shared it with the membership courtesy of Pat Goodwin, our mutual and dear friend, who brought it to her attention.

Very inspiring, so I wanted to be sure to share it here in case you haven't seen it yet. Give this little video a few minutes of your time, and you'll feel an extra degree of personal motivation today!

www.212movie.com

Let Your RAS Focus On The How

2009-10-14T07:49:41-05:00

Finally! I have an even better layperson's understanding for what happens in our brain when we shift our thinking. You see, I'm not a brain scientist (nor do I play one on t.v.!), but I've read and heard many times that when we change our thoughts, we literally change our brain... that we cause the neural cells to rearrange and reconfigure in our brain. In doing so, we are able to shift old patterns of thinking and being. What I didn't know is that there is a messaging system at the base of our skull called the RAS (Reticular Activating System) that connects the brain with the rest of the body.

In Getting It Together, author Christina Randle explains that using this RAS part of our brain "makes it easier to get what we want - and in a more organic and easy manner." She says that our brains are "designed to have us be right." Randle also points out that the brain doesn't understand when we want less of something or words like "don't." When we tell a child, "Don't spill the milk!" the child will, of course, spill the milk.

Randle suggests that we focus on what we do want rather than what we don't want as much as possible. In my work with clients who are creating shifts forward inwardly and outwardly, I encourage them to list what they don't want as a way to access what they do want. After that, the focus is all about what they do want. We shift forward when we purge that negative stuff which no longer serves us.

Randle sums it all up with the following comments: "One of the best aspects about an Intention is that you are telling your brain and the body what you want. It will figure out the how. Once you have clearly identified your Intention, the RAS immediately begins to scan your environment for options, ideas and resources. This way, you don't have to worry and focus on the specifics of how this will happen. You focus and get clear on the what - the Outcome. The RAS focuses on the how."

It's What We Notice

2009-10-09T09:09:13-05:00

A few evenings ago, I had the pleasure of listening to an interview with the venerable author of What Color is Your Parachute?, Dick Bolles.

At one point in the interview, Mr. Bolles cited another author, Don Tapscott, who’s written a terrific book called Growing Up Digital. The phrase he cited from Tapscott’s book was “it’s not what we see, it’s what we notice.” He was stressing the importance of becoming clear about what we want so that we begin to notice things in our path that help us get what we want.

Mr. Bolles then went on to tell a story about a biologist walking in Times Square with a friend. The biologist heard a cricket chirping and asked his friend if he could hear it too. The friend could not, at least not at first. The friend asked him how he could hear such a thing in a busy, noisy place filled with city sounds. Without saying a word, the biologist took a handful of coins from his pocket and tossed them onto the sidewalk. People nearby in the crowd scrambled to grab the coins as they bounced and tinkled on the pavement. “You notice what you want to notice,” the biologist told his friend.

Taking time to get clear or “doing homework on ourselves,” as Mr. Bolles calls it, is not just important to our personal development, it’s a vital step in getting what we desire. When we get clear about what to notice, we’ll hear the crickets in Times Square even when no else does.

Intention + Passionate Desire > Fear = Reality

2009-10-08T08:29:47-05:00

Intention Equation: Intention becomes reality at the point when our desire is greater than our fear.

Recently, I had the privilege of meeting author and life coach Sherry Ransom when she gave a terrific presentation about how to turn a job search into a creative journey. Underlying her comments was a true understanding of the intention equation. She told us there are actually four steps to manifesting our intentions rather than the three (thought, words & action) that most folks talk about.

Step 1: Wish (thought)
Step 2: Ask (words)
Step 3: Intend to create (action)
Step 4: Have passion

I love that she has added that last part about having passion into the equation. It's true that when we infuse our desire with passion, the intention truly has a better chance of becoming - some would even say that passion ensures the manifestation of desire. Nevertheless, passion is the great fear equalizer, don't you think?

By the way, Sherry also gave a clever definition of fear:
Framing
Everything bad
As
Reality

What a great reminder of the abiding truth... that we are in control of our perceptions!