a u b u r n & i v o r y

Baby Update

2012-02-17T16:18:00.000-08:00

I realized that the below post might have made it sound like I was not oh-so-excited for the lil' bundle of joy that is headed our way in roughly 16 weeks. This is not the case at all...we are beyond thrilled to meet our little one but it has definitely been a path of ups and downs. I promised Bill that I wouldn't turn this into a baby blog but it seems babies (or at least one baby in particular) is always on my mind lately. Plus I am terribly neglectful of this blog as it is and would like to find a new way to keep it up. So I thought I'd talk a little bit about the pregnancy so far and our battle with insurance and doctors. I'd love to hear about your experiences.

I guess I'll start by saying that I have always, always, always wanted to be a mom. Ever since I can remember I've loved the idea of having children. But I also knew I wanted them at a certain time and place in my life. I'm not sure if there would ever have a been a right time but it seems like in everyone else's mind the moment you turn 30 is when you should start popping 'em out. The funny thing was I turned 30 and I wasn't really sure anymore. I was in a pretty good place with my career and I really wanted to focus on that and I wanted things with my husband's career to get more settled before starting a family. Of course, it would be about this time that the universe decided that we would just have to figure all that stuff out AND have a baby. So needless to say, when I found out I was pregnant I was happy but I was also completely overwhelmed. Especially in the first trimester, I was sick and tired 24 hours a day and on top of that I was battling some serious baby blues. I've always been prone to periods of sadness and I also get very anxious about change. My neurotic, worrisome behavior was in full effect. Not helping at all was the fact that our insurance company was being a pain in the arse about authorizations and letting me see the OB/GYN. I had my initial appointment and then it took 4 months to get the medical group to send the authorization for the full pre-natal care. That is a lot of days stressing over what could go wrong. I just tried to be as healthy as possible and be as informed as possible hoping that everything would be OK.

Miraculously, the moment I hit the 2nd trimester the depression I had been feeling totally went away. So did the nausea (replaced with never-ending hunger). We finally got to see the doctor again, had all of my blood tests (all good) and had our first 3-D ultrasound. This little girl is already super, duper tall! She's got super long legs and gorilla feet just like her mama. I've definitely been enjoying the past few weeks. I love being able to feel her move around (which she does a lot of)...it's like my favorite thing ever. I can understand how other mommies miss that but I'm really excited to meet Eleanor too and can't wait for her to make her debut.

I would love to hear about your experiences...did you ever feel depressed, overwhelmed? Or was it 9 months of total bliss?

2012-01-13T11:03:00.000-08:00

So this happened. I have been beyond neglectful with A+I and there is no excuse. Except my world is consumed with blogging here most days and doing this other days and then whatever free moments I do have I feel like I'm just stuffing my face. I am so hungry, like, all the time! Which is better than the first trimester which was all nausea all the way. No fun.

I'm hoping today will bring goods news. I'm coming up on 19 weeks and have had a disaster of a time dealing with insurance companies, medical groups and doctors. Waiting for authorization forms and not getting the information I need has caused a lot of stress that. I'm hoping today will bring good news, so cross your fingers for us, and we'll be able to get into a doctor's office next week and find out what this little tyke is - boy or girl. Then we can finally settle the great name debate....or not.

Fall flavors

2011-10-12T16:00:00.000-07:00

I love fall. If there were a magical land where it was constantly autumn I would move there in a heartbeat. Of course, I picked the place that is constantly summer. I love layering on clothes, especially scarves, I love cool but not too cool weather, I love horror movies and, of course, I love all the treats. Last week I baked the yummiest pumpkin donuts and I just had to share the recipe from Blue Eyed Bakers. They were super easy to make and super delicious. Just FYI...let me save you five million trips trying to find a donut pan...you can get one at Sur la Table.

AFTER-ish

2011-08-25T13:02:00.000-07:00

A photo of the living room with the furniture and shit out of boxes.

Since I work from my couch most days I tend to get addicted to certain shows on Netflix instant. I just finished Dead Like Me and I'm kind of sad to say goodbye to my little TV friends. I need a new show to distract me. Any suggestions?

LA Lady

2011-07-13T23:30:00.000-07:00

{photo from leftover flowers from last week's awesome, musical, bohemian, beach-y, desert wedding}

We are slowly settling into our new Los Angeles life. I actually love it here...as long as I don't have to venture out of the apartment too often. There are definitely some bad attitudes out on the streets....more so than I ever found in San Diego...and I find it really wearing on me. I'm talking about you crabby lady who takes my money at the flower market. Would it hurt to smile? You are surrounded by flowers! Life can't be so bad! I had some not so admirable moments this past weekend....one of which may have involved me having it out with a flea market vendor. But she had it coming, I swear. I'm really going to try to be a better, kinder, calmer, more patient person. Being in this house helps because I love it here. It's so bright and big and open. I love working here though I think I'm going to need to start unplugging. Me and ol' mac-y are pretty much attached at the hip these days. I need to listen to more music, read more, spend time with my husband more. I've been reading Elizabeth's blog and I love her style, attitude, all around awesome mamaness. She is the ultimate LA lady.

What are your routines to unwind and forget the cranky cathies you might encounter? How do you balance life, work, love and happiness?

Our New Place Before-ish

2011-06-17T17:46:00.000-07:00

So we're all moved in...poor moving guys were not prepared for the killer stairs and all of our crapola. I kind of have no idea what to do with the place. All of our stuff is in here but it doesn't look quite right. I'm hoping you guys can help me out. Any ideas / inspiration?*

This is the front door and the killer stairs that you HAVE to take. There is no getting around that. I don't move a whole lot so it's probably a good thing these are here.

The living room is actually bigger than it looks here. There is so much light! You have no idea how happy that makes me. We've lived in caves for so long.

I hate those flippin' cupboards but hey what can ya do.

This is the little hallway nook. Isn't it cute? And around the corner is the washer/dryer. Word.

The other set of killer stairs. This bad boy is not messing around.

And the loft. Yeah I know you're jealous of that carpet. Mhm.

There's also a bedroom and an itty bitty extra room downstairs. There are hallways and hardwood floors just like a grown-up house! We whispered and tip-toed the first few nights because we felt like we were staying at an older relatives home. Kind of wacky.

OK, now what should I do with it?

*these photos were taken PRE-move in

LA Bound

2011-05-26T12:39:00.000-07:00

In less than 10 days, we'll load up everything we've accumulated in San Diego over the past 5 years and u-hauling it to Los Angeles. This is a move that we've talked about ad nauseum since we came to California in 2005 and I can't believe we're finally making the leap. 2011 = the year of the leap. We found an amazing loft-y apartment with dark hardwood floors and huge windows in Eagle Rock. No more box-y apartments with no hallways, no more carpet, no more dank and dark cave dwelling. I go to sleep at night dreaming of brand new floor plans and furniture configurations. Money is sure going to be tight for awhile considering the increase in rent and cost of living in general. But I still fantasize about what our new dream life is going to look like. I hate the process of moving but I love the idea of being able to start a-fresh and create the living space and living style that you've always wanted. Our little bohemian artist lovenest full of tapestry and texture, leather and lace. Joining a community garden, going to art shows, feasting with neighbors. These are things that flutter around my brain everytime I pack dusty records into crates. Of course, I usually end up going back to my same routine of work all day, clean, TV, sleep, repeat but the vision of a new life gets me through the transition process. Thank goodness for Pinterest* which can satisfy my need for daydreaming and categorizing pretty pictures. I started collecting dream home photos long before we had handed over our deposit and I can't wait to start actually using some of this inspiration for real life decorating schemes.

{via Lonny Mag}

{by Carlota Santamaria}

{via bash, please}

*I have some invites left if you want to get on the pinning train express

hi.

2011-05-11T23:53:00.000-07:00

hi.

{sheepish lopesided grin}

sooooo. it's been awhile. it's totally my fault i know. i'm sorry. there's just been a lot of stuff going on in my life and you know how time has a way of getting away from you.

but i've thought about you every day. i hope you know that.

so what's new?

oh me?

i quit my job, started my own biz and now i'm moving to LA. yeah that dreamy place in the sky that we've always talked about moving to but never mustered up the strength to actually go? well, we're going. like in two weeks. we have a house...an amazing house with hardwood floors and stairs...STAIRS!...like a real home and citrus trees and a loft. things are going to be totally different and i think i'm gonna love it.

it's so crazy how when you make a decision about how you want your life to be and then you just leap. like just make the biggest change in your life ever. how it all ends up working out so much better than you ever imagined it. like this is what you were supposed to do the entire time and you just let your silly worries and fears hold you back. when in fact there was this net to like save you. and it all ends up working out somehow in the end.

i'll be back. i promise.

xo.

Melinda and Clyde

2011-01-05T14:02:00.000-08:00

Melinda and Clyde, Episode 1 - watch more funny videos

On a happier note...my amazing, super talented husband co-wrote and co-directed a web show - Melinda and Clyde - and the first episode is up! Please check it out on Funny or Die and vote (funny, I hope)! Thank you loves!!!

Presley Love

2011-01-05T11:31:00.000-08:00

This is our baby Presley. She is like my child. Seriously...I love her more than I have ever loved anything else (except for maybe my husband). She sleeps next to me with her head on a pillow and she is just the cutest thing in the whole world. Last night she got sick and we had to take her into the hospital. Over $1500 and 17 hours later she is still there with pneumonia. The doctors say she is looking and acting better which is a good sign but they still want to monitor her until tonight or possibly tomorrow. It was such a good week and it stinks that something crappy like this always has to happen to balance things out. Now our moving fund is pretty defunct and we may still lose our baby when this is all over. Presley and I are a tad co-dependent and I don't know what I would do if I lost her so if you guys could send out some good thoughts her way that would be awesome. Thank you!!!

UPDATE: Presley is finally home and doing much better. She is not 100% but she is getting there, I hope. Thank you so much for your sweet comments.

I did it!

2011-01-03T10:54:00.000-08:00

{image via Miss Moss}

I gave my notice this morning! It was scary and sad but exciting at the same time. My colleagues here have always been like my little California family and it will be heartbreaking to leave them after all these years but taking a leap in a new and thrilling direction is pretty rad. AND I booked a client today that I was really, really crossing my fingers for! So far 2011 rocks. I'm over the moon!

I'm off to design and write full time now! Woohoo! Thank you all so much for your kind words and support. You guys are the best! xoxo.

A New Year and A New Adventure

2010-12-30T12:27:00.000-08:00

I started writing this post weeks ago so it might be a little schizo. I have a lot on my mind!  It is a little bit rant/ramble and a little bit New Years' resolution.

I've hinted here + there about changes a-brewing...changes in location and changes in life and we are approaching the deadline for the major transition period. I've been gathering information, inspiration and slowly been preparing myself for the next phase of my life over the past couple of years. But...

I've never dealt well with transition. I've been a panicky mess the past few weeks. Dropping me off at summer camp for the first time was a nightmare. Of course, two days later I would be frolicking in the woods and making paper mache masks but the hours leading up to the event were always absolute torture. I know I'll be fine and everything will turn out OK but I still always manage to worry myself into a frizzy in anticipation. Also, in order to live the life I want I have had to force myself to act in a way that is slightly uncomfortable and out of my nature. I definitely have crazy, hermit, cat-lady tendencies. If it weren't for this whole ambition/follow your dreams kick I've been on I would be more than content holing myself up in my apartment and speaking to no one but my husband and my dog for days at a time.  I have chosen a path, however, that involves a lot of face time with other human beings. I love these people dearly but I've had to really condition myself over the years to come out of my shell and be a braver, bolder person.

So...next week when everyone gets back into the office I am giving my notice. Eek! I have worked as a coordinator for a non-profit arts organization for the past 4 years. I applied for the position while I was the Admin Asst though I thought I might be completely unqualified. Part of me, the part that is afraid of rejection and would prefer to take the easy way out, almost didn't hand in my resume. But I got the job and I proved to myself that I was in fact qualified and developed the position into something so much more than it was when I started.   I really found myself in this little office and learned so much about what I am capable of and what I really love to do. As comfortable as it would be to stay here forever I wouldn't be the brave, bold person I want to be...the person who takes risks and doesn't take the easy way out...if I didn't leave now and start on the new adventure.

I have no idea what this new year will hold...the last year was jam-packed with new beginnings and surprises...but I know that I want to continue on this path. This New Year's I resolve to...

1. Keep on being bold n' brave.

2. Keep on taking risks and avoiding the easy way out.

3. Take all those beginnings and surprises from 2010 and make them even bigger and better.

2010-11-29T15:52:00.000-08:00

I am closing in on my three year anniversary with Auburn + Ivory. It is so weird to go back through all the posts and see how much has changed. Not necessarily my tastes (I still love Beach House + Miranda July) but my life would be totally different if I hadn't got up the nerve to write that first post. I shudder to think what I would be doing right now. I probably never would have met really rad people that I consider good friends and I definitely wouldn't be on the same adventure.

And it is a crazy, busy adventure right now. I've neglected this little space recently and I've been struggling with whether or not I want to keep updating it or to just remember it fondly and get on with the next chapter. I haven't been putting as much effort into writing unique posts and that just doesn't cut it. I don't want to just regurgitate things I like in my google reader.

I'm not ready to say goodbye yet but there may be some changes a-coming. I may get a little more personal here which is cussing scary. Up until this point I've been careful not to get too intimate and instead have chosen to just share pretty things and the occasional plea for advice. In the past, some of you have requested more talk about my life and I'm going to try and deliver that from here on out.

Stay tuned...

Fate + The Floral Lab

2010-11-12T09:55:00.000-08:00

{photo by the Youngrens}

The universe can be a funny place. I don't always know if I'm fully convinced that there is such a thing as fate or destiny but then something totally kooky and amazing happens and I have to wonder. Sometimes it's a subtle sign and sometimes it's a big ol' slap in the face...in the best possible way. That's how I feel about meeting Leigh Anne of The Floral Lab.

The day before my wedding I got an email from Paige and Kelly asking me to be a part of Hitched. First, I was filled with joy and excitement but then I remembered that my schedule was absolutely chaotic and wondered how would I ever pull it off. With deep regrets, I had to decline their offer. Two weeks went by and I received another email basically telling me that no was not an option and I was going to be at Hitched one way or another. They paired me up with The Floral Lab since we were both in San Diego and it would be easier to meet. I truly believe that the match up was fate. Working with Leigh Anne was totally awesome. We have very similar working methods and similar aesthetics and just get along famously so when she told me that she had to pack up and move to New York City I was sad that I was going to lose a new friend. Then she totally floored me by asking me to manage and design for The Floral Lab here while she worked on building The Floral Lab part 2 to the east coast! I couldn't deny the universe any longer so I jumped at the chance. We have worked on four gorgeous weddings together over the past month and I have already learned so much from Leigh Anne. She is so talented and I am honored to be a part of The Floral Lab team.

We love designing for events all over Southern California and New York City will not be deprived of The Floral Lab talent any longer! Keep us in mind no matter what coast your planning from!

2010-10-20T21:50:00.000-07:00

{via designlovefest}

Gahgahgahgah. I.have.no.words. That is a giant Anna Karina head over pretty painted stairs. Can I live inside this Kate Spade pop up shop, please?

Grunstein Halloween

2010-10-19T15:57:00.001-07:00

These are some totally creepy images from Denise Grunstein. Possible Halloween costumes??? I have no clue what to be this year and I have a rad party to go to! Help!

2010-10-11T10:28:00.000-07:00

{via Wisteria}

I would trade in all my other furniture and possessions for this sofa.

Lonny Magazine

2010-09-15T22:20:00.000-07:00

Lonny Mag has a new website and it's purtty little categories speak to both the design lover and the organizer in me. Each room has it's own chic little section so you can find exactly what you're looking for and with insane interiors like these I have a feeling that won't be hard.

2010-09-08T20:29:00.000-07:00

{via}

I'm obsessed with this photograph from Marc Jacobs' first apartment in Paris. I just keep going back to it. Sure, it's a bit 90s-tastic but so am I so we make a swell pair.

The Brass Petal {Part II}

2010-08-25T10:05:00.001-07:00

OK I couldn't resist posting more pictures of Emily Henderson's - the WINNER of HGTV's Design Star - apartment by Terilyn Fisher. I can NOT wait for her show to air on Sunday. She just kills me with her perfect styling.

The Brass Petal

2010-08-20T15:02:00.000-07:00

I watched one episode of HGTV's Design Star, wasn't exactly thrilled with it and haven't seen an episode since. BUT the clear favorite for me just from watching that first one was Emily. Her room design was exactly my style and her outfit was just too adorable. She actually ended up in the bottom two, I think, that week so I was happy to hear today that she is one of the top two to win it! I was also REALLY happy to hear that she has a little blog of her own - The Brass Petal. She is an insane stylist with shoots for Domino under her belt. I actually saw the living room above somewhere else recently and it turns out this is HER living room (by the way, Emily, I agree with your husband)! I still want you to style my house when I move to LA, though! OK, off to start reading The Brass Petal from the beginning!

2010-08-19T15:43:00.000-07:00

{photo by Kawashi Makotori via Scout Holiday}

I can't get over this little face!

2010-08-10T17:29:00.001-07:00

{via}

I know, I know. I don't blog for a month and this is all I have to say?

2010-07-15T18:00:00.000-07:00

My friend is selling her condo in San Diego and it is seriously stunning. She has an amazing eye and is always super chic. Oh and it doesn't hurt to have a fabulous architect as a husband. I'm trying to get her to redo my apartment (on a shoestring budget, natch).

2010-07-08T11:47:00.000-07:00

I have caught a serious nesting bug, folks. Gosh, I feel like such a cliche but I moved directly from wedding mags to home decor mags in a matter of two days. It's sick, I know. I'm looking forward to rearranging the apartment this weekend and dreaming about the possible places our itty bitty nest egg fund could get us. Why of why did Domino have to go away??? What are your favorite decorating mags now?

I kind of want to just paint everything we own black and white.

I'm pretty sure I would never get out of bed if this were mine.

{via housebeautiful}