Austrian for foreigners

The Basilisk of Vienna

2023-10-27T22:03:00.001+02:00

The story is about the Basilisk, a mythical creature that is said to live in the sewers of Vienna. The Basilisk is a hybrid of a rooster and a lizard, with a deadly gaze that can kill anyone who looks into its eyes. The legend is that the Basilisk was born from an egg laid by a rooster and hatched by a toad. It was first sighted in the 13th century, when it terrorized the city and caused many deaths.

One of the most famous incidents involving the Basilisk happened in 1212, when a baker named Hans Resel discovered the creature in his well. He tried to kill it with a spear, but the Basilisk's gaze turned him into stone. The people of Vienna were afraid and did not know how to get rid of the monster. They consulted a wise man, who told them that the only way to defeat the Basilisk was to make it see its own reflection.

A young apprentice named Johann Rettensteiner volunteered to carry out the plan. He took a mirror and descended into the well, where he faced the Basilisk. He held up the mirror and made the Basilisk look into it. The Basilisk saw its own eyes and was instantly petrified. Johann emerged from the well as a hero and was rewarded by the city council. He later became a famous painter and sculptor.

The story of the Basilisk is still remembered today in Vienna. There is a fountain on Schönlaterngasse that depicts the scene of Johann and the Basilisk. There is also a house on Domgasse that has a relief of a rooster's head on its facade, which is said to mark the spot where the Basilisk's egg was found.

Viennese German vs. German German

2020-04-07T13:22:00.002+02:00

Pipihenderl

2017-07-06T12:14:00.002+02:00

Some entertainment with chicken today. As always: Henderl is a smaller version of chicken. Hendl would be used where I am from.

And Pipi is for chicks - small chicken, because that's the sound they are making.

Enjoy! - And if you have a headache after, don't blame me!

New Beginnings

2017-06-13T17:28:00.002+02:00

Today something German: The great author Hermann Hesse. The line "Und jedem Anfang wohnt ein Zauber inne" ("A magic dwells in each beginning") is just so current.

As I ran into many "Page not found" errors, I simply copy the URL and the text.

Enjoy!

http://www.hhesse.de/gedichte.php?load=stufen

Stufen
Wie jede Blüte welkt und jede Jugend
Dem Alter weicht, blüht jede Lebensstufe,
Blüht jede Weisheit auch und jede Tugend
Zu ihrer Zeit und darf nicht ewig dauern.
Es muß das Herz bei jedem Lebensrufe
Bereit zum Abschied sein und Neubeginne,
Um sich in Tapferkeit und ohne Trauern
In andre, neue Bindungen zu geben.
Und jedem Anfang wohnt ein Zauber inne,
Der uns beschützt und der uns hilft, zu leben.

Wir sollen heiter Raum um Raum durchschreiten,
An keinem wie an einer Heimat hängen,
Der Weltgeist will nicht fesseln uns und engen,
Er will uns Stuf' um Stufe heben, weiten.
Kaum sind wir heimisch einem Lebenskreise
Und traulich eingewohnt, so droht Erschlaffen,
Nur wer bereit zu Aufbruch ist und Reise,
Mag lähmender Gewöhnung sich entraffen.

Es wird vielleicht auch noch die Todesstunde
Uns neuen Räumen jung entgegen senden,
Des Lebens Ruf an uns wird niemals enden...
Wohlan denn, Herz, nimm Abschied und gesunde!
4.5.1941

https://mindmastery.wordpress.com/2007/02/17/hermann-hesse-steps-stufen/

Steps
As every blossom fades
and all youth sinks into old age,
so every life’s design, each flower of wisdom,
attains its prime and cannot last forever.
The heart must submit itself courageously
to life’s call without a hint of grief,
A magic dwells in each beginning,
protecting us, telling us how to live.

High purposed we shall traverse realm on realm,
cleaving to none as to a home,
the world of spirit wishes not to fetter us
but raise us higher, step by step.
Scarce in some safe accustomed sphere of life
have we establish a house, then we grow lax;
only he who is ready to journey forth
can throw old habits off.

Maybe death’s hour too will send us out new-born
towards undreamed-lands,
maybe life’s call to us will never find an end
Courage my heart, take leave and fare thee well.

Die Presse Quiz

2017-04-13T08:20:00.001+02:00

Today, the Viennese newspaper Die Presse published a quiz on the dialect used in Austria. If you read the blog and did the assignments, you should be easily able to complete the questions.

Good luck!

http://diepresse.com/home/bildung/5197542/Oesterreichisch-fuer-Fortgeschrittene_Was-ist-ein-Heckenklescher

Surm

2017-04-04T09:24:00.002+02:00

Today we are talking about the great word "Surm". "Surm" is a noun and our friends over at Rind Vieh
http://www.rindvieh.com/Dialekte/Oesterreich/Surm
Say that this is a stupid human. However, they place it into the category of harmless words. Harmless words are for them abusive language for every day use. Interesting definition!

"Surm" causes a lot of confusion, as in different people use it in different ways. We over here at "Austrian for foreigners" have the mission to make things clearer, or at least more fun. "Surm" is definitely one of these words that can provide that kind of entertainment.

Simply looking to our authoritative friends over at Ostrarichi hey have two variations:

First they call Surm a meat heat:
http://www.ostarrichi.org/wort-2245-Surm-Dummkopf.html

Second they call Surm a confused person:
http://www.ostarrichi.org/wort-15574-Surm-ein_verwirrter_Mensch.html

User ant18ikes does the only thing that a true Austrian can do: Make things smaller. So simply use "Surmerl"!

Servus

2017-03-12T16:31:00.003+01:00

As you know, Austrians are very friendly people. Part of being friendly is to have manners. Having manners includes that you greet.

You also know, that Austrians are super-efficient. As such, they have multi-purpose words: You can use the same word in multiple situations.

One of these words is Servus. The word comes from the Latin servant of slave. According to Wikipedia "The phrase is an ellipsis of a Latin expression servus humillimus, domine spectabilis, meaning "[your] most humble servant, [my] noble lord." No subservience is implied in its modern use, which has the force of "at your service." Servus is the origin of the word serf." - But that sounds very complicated.

Servus is great, because you can use it to say Hi when you meet somebody. You can use it when you cheers with somebody. You can use it to say Good Bye.

Or to put it with the words of the late and great Peter Alexander: Every city has their own parting words; in Paris you say "Bonsoir, bonsoir, Paris!" in Roma you say Ciao! Or you sing Arrivederci Roma! But by us in Vienna you simply say Servus!

Google Friend Connect

2016-01-08T13:02:00.000+01:00

This is just an administrative message, in case you have not read the update on Google Friend connect here:
http://buzz.blogger.com/2015/12/an-update-on-google-friend-connect.html

Basically, Google Friend Connect should be a way to easily follow blogs. I cannot comment on this, as I never got it to work.
https://www.google.com/friendconnect/admin/site/setup always came up with some strange error messages.

In theory, once should have been able to able to log into Friend Connect with a number of accounts, including Twitter, Yahoo, Orkut or other OpenId providers and then use this Friend Connect account to follow blog content.

Please, if somebody is using this tool from Google, could you please post in the comments section your experience with it?

Update from the 19th of January
As I did not get feedback in the comments, I will post the Google Help text here:

Manage blogs you follow

You can read the latest posts on your favorite blogs by adding them to the reading list on your Blogger dashboard.

Follow a blog

When you follow a blog, the latest post will be displayed in your reading list. There are two ways to follow a blog.
From your Blogger dashboard

Sign in to Blogger.
Under “Reading List,” click Add.
Enter the URL of the blog you want to follow. To add more blogs, click +Add.
Select whether to follow publicly or anonymously.
Click Follow.

From the blog's Follower's widget

In the blog that you want to follow, look for the Followers widget.
Click Join this site.
Sign in with your Google account.
In the window that appears, choose to follow publicly or privately.
Click Follow this blog.

If you choose to follow publicly, your picture and a link to your Blogger or Google+ profile will be displayed on the widget.

Change how you follow a blog

Here’s how to change your privacy settings on the blogs you follow:

Sign in to Blogger.
Under “Reading List,” on the right, click Options.
Next to the blog you’d like to change, select your privacy setting to public or anonymous.

Stop following a blog

From your Blogger dashboard

Sign in to Blogger.
Under “Reading List,” on the right, click Options .
Next to the blog you want to remove, click Stop following .

From the blog's Follower's widget

In the blog that you don’t want to follow anymore, look for the Followers widget.
Click Options > Site Settings.
In the window that appears, click Stop following this site.

Let readers follow your blog

To let other people follow your blog, add the Followers widget:

Sign in to Blogger.
Select the blog to update.
In the left menu, click Layout > Add a Gadget.
In the pop-up window, click More Gadgets.
Search for Followers and click Add .
Select your settings and click Save.
On the top right, click Save arrangement.

To see your followers and what blogs other people are following, click their pictures.
To prevent a user from appearing in your Followers list, from your Blogger dashboard, click Followers. Even if you block a follower, they may still be able to read and comment on your blog.

Deppenzepter

2015-08-13T09:08:00.003+02:00

Today, we don’t talk about an indigenous, Austrian word. But it is great. So I could not resist. We are talking about the Deppenzepter.

If you Google the word, you may not find that many hits, yet.

Let’s do the normal thing and dissect the word. It consists of the German Depp which could be translated as idiot, fool or joker. As well as the work Zepter which is scepter, sign for the king. Or better the Joker, as in this playing card:

To get an idea about the meaning of the word, think about the last time you were somewhere nice and you nearly got beaten by a person with a stick. Never happened to you? That’s just because the person did it unintentionally. And the stick was sophisticated with a phone on the other end! Does it start to make sense?

As an image tells more than a thousand words, let’s place a great phone from a guy with a Deppenzepter here:

Thanks Heise Foto for the great article!

Homework: Please have a healthy laugh about people making selfies, especially, if done with a stick.

Fenster Putzen

2015-07-23T12:02:00.001+02:00

Austrians have an obsession with cleaning windows. Cleaning, or better clean places, in general. But cleaning windows especially. Being born and raised here I never even thought of that this could be out of the normal, but today I realized that this must an Austrian special obsession. I only realized that today. We have lived a year in the Caribbean, where I wanted to get the windows of our apartment cleaned. Every maid told me that they “don’t do windows”. So I tried to clean the windows myself, which produced not the result – spotless clean windows – I wanted due to the burglar proving. I looked up professional cleaning companies which all responded with dismay to my request of cleaning windows – or better having clean windows. Today, first meeting of the cleaning lady in Austria and she insist of cleaning the windows – which look spotless to me.

Which reminded me of some discussions on a popular social networking site where some of my friends dissed some of my other friends, because they only cleaned their windows four times per year.

Spotless clean windows are a must in Austria

Lesson learnt. Austrians value clean windows more than anybody else in the world. I assume it is because of lack of sunlight here. We need clean windows to have a little bit brighter rooms. In the Caribbean a little dust might help to keep the sun out and the rooms cooler.

Trinidad has more sunlight

Homework: Please post below how often you clean your windows or get your windows cleaned. Please also provide information how sunny your place of living it. It would be interesting, if my theory proves right or wrong.

Na no na net!

2015-04-14T19:28:00.000+02:00

Today, I found a great resource on Facebook: smoonr

They are talking about a great phrase: "Na no na net!" which is the Austrian phrase for "Yes!". You may have learned in school that a double negative is a bad grammar, but you know, we are talking about Austrians: what is a rule not to to do somewhere else is endorsed here.

Kaffeepause? #nanonanet #wortschatz
Posted by smoonr on Monday, April 13, 2015

Is des Holler?

2014-05-11T17:23:00.000+02:00

I hope after todays posting you don’t say about it: “Des is Holler!”

“Holler” is “Hollunder” in Hochdeutsch and “elder” or “elderberry” in English; the scientific name for the plant is “Sambucus nigra” - Now, please don’t tell anybody, that I am not specific! :)

And here you have a pretty picture of an elderberry flower, once again powered by Wikipedia.

I have fond childhood memories collecting the flowers with my mummy and producing the syrup together afterwards. I like elderberry flower juice; and as I am not the only one liking it, there is commercial supply for the syrup these days as well:

In case the flowers are not cut off, the plant can build a fruit, which then looks like this:

The elderberry plant is a strong plant, it is close to impossible to kill it once it grows and it grows close to everywhere. Therefore, there are a lot of recipes. However, I have to admit, I don’t like a single dish produced with the finished fruit.

The most common one is the Hollerröster, where you simply put the berries with some wine, sugar, cinnamon and a apple or pear into a pot and let it boil for an hour or two. When I grew up it was made with little sugar and no wine or cinnamon. High in Vitamins and healthy but not tasty. Actually it looks quite similar to Powidl.

So the Austrian saying “Des is Holler” simply means “This is stupid” - I guess because most people simply consider the dish stupid…

Homework: Think of the dishes you ate when growing up and enjoyed. Extra points for posting information about these dishes in the area below.

Breaking News! Austria wins Eurovision Song Contest as predicted on this blog

2014-05-10T23:30:00.000+02:00

Did you see the news? Austria won the Eurovision Song Contest. Find all details on the website of the BBC. Last time Austria won the Sing Contest was 38 years ago with this great song:

If you want to see past entries about this please go to that section of the blog.

Did you ever cut air?

2014-05-09T20:30:00.004+02:00

Today we cut air. Say what?

How do you cut air? Generally it depends on the consistency. The consistency on the components. If there are a lot of things that attribute to bad air quality, the Austrian is quite quick to say “Die Luft is zum scheiden”.

But these things that attribute to bad air quality don’t need to be physical necessarily. They can also be verbally and/or nonverbally between two people. Then the outsider would say that “zwischen die zwa kaunst die Luft schneiden”. The saying is just that you can cut the air. It does not tell you how.

In German you would say something like “es herrscht dicke Luft” which translates to “there is thick air”. The meaning is the same. In Austria you would use that phrase if three or more people are involved in changing the consistency of air to be able to cut it.

Not only can you use that phrase in a figurative way, but also when actual physical things make the air so thick that you can cut it: when the air is muggy and humid, just as it is before a cleaning thunderstorm you can apply that.

Not only air can be naturally of a consistency to be cut, it can also get that way from humans smoking. Talking about that subject, and especially making rules regarding smoking is always something that causes thick air between everybody involved. You may find a further, quite advanced lesson regarding smoking in Austria in general and in restaurants and pubs in specific here:

Your browser does not support the video tag.

Homework: Relax. Don't take things other people might say to serious and avoid that you can cut the air between you and somebody else.

Do you really care?

2014-05-08T21:33:00.000+02:00

Another great phrase for "I don't care" in Austrian is "Des is ma Powidl". First, you need to learn what Powidl is. Here you have an image of Powidldatschgerln:

Sorry, if you are hungry now; I definitely am. Above seen delights are made out of tasty potato tough filled with jam from plums. I am sure they are calorie reduced. But then Garfield the comic cat stated that calories are there to be eaten and not to be counted…

Now, we call jam in Austria Marmelade, we don't care about the European Union telling us that Marmelade must be made out of citrus fruits, we would rather exit the EU than renaming our Marmelade to the German Konfitüre.

Also, we call our plums Zwetschgen. We would never even dream of calling them Pflaumen, no matter how much pressure might come from Germany in the form of entertainment shows produced there.

Austrians say to this kind of pressure - from the EU to rename the Marmelade to Konfitüre or from the Germans to call their Zwetschgen suddenly Pflaumen - simply "Des is ma Wurscht!" At least with this statement of indifference I managed low carb, as I failed with low calories above.

Just in case you don't know what I mean and to end the post with a fruit - the actual Zwetschge

Homework: Eat a good dessert but don't waste your time counting the calories, simply enjoy it.

Do you eat ice creat the right way?

2014-05-08T10:22:00.000+02:00

Summer is coming - or at least so we hope - therefore ice cream needs to be eaten. The right way to eat ice cream is with friends, outside on a hot day, in a Stanitzel like this:

The great linguist Johann Siegmund Popowitsch (sorry for the article in German, if you want to have details about him in English, please post exact questions below and I will answer them as good as I can) said that it originates from Slovenian: škarnicelj, Croatian: štanicl, respectively škarnicl Serbian: štanicla or Hungarian: stanicli. - I am sure he is right about this!

Stanitzel is a great example for the difference between Austrian German and German spoken in Germany. If you order a Stanitzel in Germany, nobody will understand you. You need to order a Tüte in Germany. However, if you order a Tüte in Austria, you might get into troubles with law enforcement, as you are ordering illegal drugs!

Homework: Look outside the window. If the sun is shining, meet up with friends and eat ice cream out of a Stanitzel. Don’t forget to enjoy yourself and have fun!

Also, post below your favorite flavor of ice cream. Explain, why you like that taste. I am looking forward to your responses!

I hob' gern ...

2014-05-07T19:33:00.002+02:00

As promised before in this article, if you do your homework and post in the area provided below the posts, I will write an article about the phrase “I hob gern”. There were thousands of comments; thank you for doing your homework so proper!

As you know by now by reading this blog, Austrians are fun people. You can only be a fun person if you like what you are doing. Unfortunately, if you like to much what you are doing, you might overdo from time to time - and this is exactly what happens sometimes.

The phrase “I hob gern” means translates “I like”. A good utilization of the phrase is to tell a loved one “I hob’ Di gern” - “I like you”. As stated before, mostly used for love, but can also be used for a close friend or a family member.

Another very prominent application of this phrase is “Du kaunst mi gern hobn!” - literally translated to “You can like me!” - But in no way this is a request for love! It is merely a request to be left alone.

However, some Austrians overdo it and then you hear something like “I hob gern Bauchweh” - which is literally translated: “I like to have have stomach aches” - and no, not even Austrians do like to have stomach aches. It just means that the person saying this has often stomach aches.

Homework for today: Enjoy what you are doing. If it is a task you don’t like think of Mary Poppins (unknown in Austria): “For every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. Find it and - snap! The job’s a game!”

Should the task still be not enjoyable, and should the reason for the lack of enjoyment be a person, then simply tell them to like you - the Austrian way.

Oida!

2014-05-06T11:53:00.003+02:00

Today's word is as great as the English “isn`t it”. Something that you can easily append to every sentence. However, as we are taking Austrian, so the word must be better, mustn’t it?

You can use Oida for everything and this repeatedly! A construct like “Oida, wos wüst Oida” is perfectly fine. Originally, Oida would translate to something like old man. However, in no way the person addressed needs to be old (I would even say the opposite is true) or male - remember we Austrians are politically very correct, especially colloquially. So words that imply that they are only male can be applied to females as well.

A fine piece of art was produced by the guys from Trackshittaz who made a great song with the mind enriching title “Oida Taunz!” Please have a look at it yourself here:

By the way, the Trackshittaz were Austria’s nomination for the Eurovision Song Contest 2012 with the song "Woki mit deim Popo" (the title of the Song would translate to “Shake your booty”). This year we sent a guy or a girl (sorry, I am not too sure) called Conchita Wurst.

Homework: Please tell me if this is a girl or a guy:

If you want to get extra points, please also watch her or his song, it is supposed to be not too bad, I have not heard it myself yet.

G'scheit

2014-05-05T21:11:00.001+02:00

Thanks for checking on today's smart entry!

We are talking about g’scheit, the short form of gescheit and according to dictionary the German word for smart or educated.

However (did you realize that however is one of the most used words in this blog?), you can use g’scheit for more. For example you can tell a child: “Sits g’scheit!” In no way you are telling the child to sit like Auguste Rodin's The Thinker (French: Le Penseur). Just in case your forgot what I am talking about, please find an image here:

No you are just telling the child to sit proper.

Or you can tell somebody: “Des hot g’scheit weh dau!” Again this was not something that hurt and made you smarter in any ways, it just really, really hurt!

As always, Austrians are positive, so they also say "Der is owa g'scheit deppat". They don't mean that somebody is stupid in a smart way, I think you can figure out yourself what is meant.

The Homework for today: use positive language. If I get enough entries, I will write about "i hob gern” - and believe me, I don’t only mean the literal translation that you like something.

Voll Karacho

2011-10-30T19:58:00.000+01:00

Today’s word I have actually seen on a playground in Munich: “Voll Karacho ins Vergnügen? Aber sicher! We regularly check our equipment; however, should a toy be faulty, please call our service line.”

I have no idea where the word is coming from or what its word stem is. The meaning of voll Karacho is something is going with a high velocity or full force. Unfortunately, this great word seems to fade away.

When I was a child, we used “Na der is owa voi Karacho g’fohrn” for every vehicle that went just above walking speed. It was very nice to see this word on a playground. Thank you, Munich! You made my day.

Homework: Tell somebody about a fond childhood memory.

Motje – South-African for an Elderly Muslim Woman

2011-10-22T07:00:00.000+02:00

Yesterday, in Cape Town, South Africa I learnt a new word: Motje. This is an old Muslim woman and the word seems to be quite commonly used. However, they way the people pronounce it here is more like mushy. This then leads to the vulgar Austrian word Muschi.

I will not explain what this word means, as I am sure you can figure that out yourself. Just so much, it can be used for a woman, but is more often used for one specific part of her.

But imagine my surprise when I went out with very nice people, very well educated and generally the best manners, to this high-class restaurant and they call the elderly waitress that took very good care of us a Muschi, sorry, a Motje I mean.

Homework: Treat yourself! Go and have a nice dinner at a nice restaurant and most importantly: Do this with nice people whose company you enjoy!

Learning languages makes you smarter

2011-10-10T11:53:00.002+02:00

Please read this article:Learning languages makes you smarter

Finally, it is clear that learning another language makes you smarter as it shows you other facets of live. Now with the wonderful Austrian language this is even better as there are so many words that you can use for completely different things.

Just remember our lessons here about Schachtel and Blunzn. Do not forget Schnitt'n!

Waschlappen

2009-07-12T07:49:00.005+02:00

Nobody can beat Wikipedia with the preciseness of the description of this one: "Ein Waschlappen, regional auch Seiflappen, ist ein mehr als handtellergroßes Textilstück zur Körperpflege. Er ist oft als Waschhandschuh in rechteckiger Form gestaltet, in den eine Hand hineinschlüpfen kann. Das Material ist unterschiedlich, doch wird baumwollhaltiges Frottee bevorzugt benutzt. Abgesehen von der Alten- und Krankenpflege werden Waschlappen heute nur noch selten verwendet..." - together with an excellent picture:

The Google translation for this text is even better: "A washcloth, Seiflappen even regionally, is a more than palm-large textile pieces to personal hygiene. He is often referred to as washing glove in rectangular shape into which a hand can hineinschlüpfen. The material is different, but is preferably used baumwollhaltiges terry. Apart from the elderly and nursing washcloth are today only rarely used"

Now, there you see a couple of interesting facts: I thought that it must be only me, who has never heard Seiflappen before; but as Google does not know about it, that word simply cannot exist!

Also, that Google refers to the Waschlappen as "He" is quite telling: This great tool I grew up with is in fact a male noun! Google really knows everything - this is a new breeding ground for conspiracy theories. But as this is not the purpose of the Blog, I will skip on that.

I will make a note about "hinenschlüpfen" oder the much better, because Austrian, version "einischliafn" and explain this in another post.

So, but we still did not come to the "Austrianity" about this word; I don't want to leave the impression, that this tool is nowhere used for hygienic purposes except in Austrian. Yes, it is still used here, but not only to wash. It is also used for education! Not directly, but figuratively. There is no man who did not hear that sentence when he was younger: "Bist a Bua oda a Woschloppn!?".

I guess this great sentence has made us what we are. I mean, just look at Arnold Schwarzenegger! This is how we all look here. Because clearly, we are "kane Woschloppn"

Nudlaug

2009-07-11T10:53:00.000+02:00

This is one of the all time favorites of everybody! You pronounce it as Nudlaug, but is should be written as "Nudelauge" - if you say it that way it is even more insulting.

Talking about insulting: Yes it is a cuss word, but let's go to the terminology: Nudel is noodle and Auge is eye. Doesn't fit together you think? Think again, we are talking about Austrians :)

As we are talking about where the word comes from, this word was made super-popular by the series "Ein echter Wiener geht nicht unter" staring Karl Merkatz as Edmund "Mundl" Sackbauer.

But I still owe you the complete root of the word: Nudel as noodle is not referenced to spaghettis the singular form is more fitting and then only if you use it in the context of part of the male reproductional system. But then you might wonder what an eye has to do with that... If you are still wondering, you might have to watch more movies!

Salzburger Freundlichkeit

2007-05-04T11:05:00.000+02:00

Today's might be a little bit hard to understand. But we have to move forward to advanced lessons.

Salzburg, Hochsommer, Mittagshitze ca. 38 ° C:

Steht ein Mann in Badehose mitten an der Salzach, füllt einen Maßkrug mit wasser und will gerade zu trinken anfangen, als vom Ufer ein Salzburger zu ihm hinüberbrüllt: "He, Du, wos mochst'n Du do? Bist deppert? Du konnst doch net des dreckerte soizochwossa saufn. Do wirst doch kronk und griagst an sackrischen Duachfoi und schbeim muaßt a sicher drauf! Hund und Kotzn scheiß'n eini; do is ois mit Bakterien und Vir'n versaicht. Wenn's bled hergeht, muaßt sogoa gonz elendiglich dro voreggn."

Der Mann an der Salzach schaute ihn an und fragte: "Wat ham se jesacht? Sprechen Sie kein Deutsch, Mann?"

Darauf plärrt der Salzburger im perfekten Schriftdeutsch noch lauter: "Gaaanz langsam trinken, das Wasser ist seeehr kalt"