CoachKelley

New Blog Site

2017-11-09T18:10:00.001-06:00

Thank you for stopping by as always my goal is to empower and transform your life. For the past seven years, I have written blogs on blogger as well as over seventy-five. Fortunately, I have a new website, and my blogs will now be inscribed directly on there. However, if time permits, I will drop them here as well. So, don't unsubscribe, just join me on my new WordPress site as I promise to continue to empower and transform your life.

Please click here and subscribe so that when I write new blogs, books and create new products, you will receive a notification. I thank you for following, commenting and subscribing in advance.

Lastly, prepare for my latest book, Detox or DIEt, releases in January 2018.

Detox or DIEt

Have you ever experienced an illness that doctors had no idea where it originated? Are you suffering from chronic fatigue, brain fog or digestive issues? If so, parasites in your body might just be the cause. Doctors asked me had I left the country in the last 3-6 months, and I have not. What that means is, doctors cannot blame Third World countries for this parasitic infection. The healthcare industry would have us think that parasitic infections do not occur as much in North America. However, based on the dis-ease I experienced over the last three decades, healing my body, spending twenty-three in the healthcare industry and being a member of the American Society of Clinical Pathologist, I am convinced that parasitic infections or parasite related dis-eases are rapidly increasing.

Doctors tell us dis-ease is hereditary, change your DIEt, you’re aging, and that somehow disease just arises spontaneously, or for which the cause is unknown. After suffering and healing from hypothyroidism, irritable bowel syndrome, early-stage heart disease, obesity, high cholesterol and inflammatory bowel disease, I know all disease starts in the gut. I have also experienced gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD), constipation, diarrhea, bloating, joint pain, brain fog, allergies and sinus pressure. Lastly, I have experienced dark circles under my eyes, insomnia, headaches, ovarian cyst, bacterial vaginitis, vaginal yeast infections, pityriasis rosea, ringworms, psoriasis, alopecia, and now, according to doctors, lichen planus. Not only does all dis-ease start in the gut, but I am convinced parasites are the reason for all disease. The thought of parasites may gross you out, but I highly suggest you read Detox or DIEt and take control of your health.

Thank you for reading and please share as you are also welcome to comment below.

The Wounded Beautiful Man

2016-02-22T20:40:00.000-06:00

Thank you for stopping by as always my goal is to empower and transform your life. INjoy!

Have you ever truly seen your man, I mean naked, emotionally naked?

Have you ever seen beyond his physical being and looked into his soul?

Has he given you the opportunity to see his fears, insecurities, pain, or the self behind the ego?

Have you ever seen the depths of your man as he reaches the depths of your body?

His pain, fears, anger, jealousy, and insecurities is really the beauty beneath his physical body.

The beauty that calls for him to trust you and share his deepest secrets. As he cries and lays his head upon your breast and wishes for you to nurture him as he longed for it for many years from his mother. His strong arms hold you gently and tightly as he just wants to feel your warmth and security. The security that was stolen from him as a little boy and now he's a man with the same fears and insecurities. You rub his head and assure his safety, the safety of his heart that was once discarded.

He is beautiful and strong as he cries and reconnects with his little boy's pain. He is beautiful as he withdraws and emotionally clams out of fear you might not understand.

He is a man. A man in touch with his feminine energy and not afraid to be judged or accused of being a bitch.

He is a man. A wounded man, who never healed from the wounded boy.

He is a man. A man who trusts you, his woman, to understand, have compassion and love him for who he is.

He is a man. A man who once lived in fear and until he felt your love, he can now live.

He wants to heal, but he needs to know he can count on you to support him and not judge him. He opens up and shows you the beauty of a wounded man. The pain deep down in his soul that has prevented him from loving and trusting you the way you deserve. He's a wounded man, but he's a loving man.

He loves you, but his pain is deeper than you can imagine. Hold him, love him, empower him, cry with him, and never degrade him.

He is a man, OUR man, the man who will protect and die for you. Cherish him, encourage him and let him be.

He's wounded, but he's beautiful as he allows you to see the true depths of his soul. He removes his Ego and allows you to see his true self. The pain he suffers, the fears he face, the insecurities he lives with and the jealousy that scares you.

Have patience with him as he is a man, a wounded man, in need of real love and compassion.

The Wounded Beautiful Man

I am not only a Certified Life Coach, Author and Speaker; I have conquered thirty years of abuse; including incest, rape, sexual, physical, emotional, verbal abuse, and two domestic violence relationships. Today, my vision is to empower you to reach emotional freedom while gaining clarity and discovering your infinite possibilities.

“What happened; didn't happen to me, it happened FOR me and today my mission is to guide you to design a healthy, meaningful life through knowledge, consciousness, self-reflection, accountability, self-love and forgiveness.”

START YOUR HEALING TODAY

Contact me for more details.

773.419.3070

Healing the Mind, Body & Soul

Divine International Healing & Leadership Center

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KARMA Serves You in LOVE

2015-06-17T15:54:00.000-05:00

Karmic Debt is at the soul level, meaning you are born with a certain amount of Karma that your previous person did not receive as he or she died before receiving it.

What does that mean? We are NOT just five sense people (sight, taste, touch, feel, hear) NOPE, we are beyond that. We are multisensory spirits covered in skin, or in the physical realm. Before this life, you're living; your spirit was carried by someone else. (Reincarnation) This PERSONality created Karmic Debt as you had today and died before the Universe balanced the soul's energy (Meaning, passed away before Karma came back to him/her) So, now your PERSONality is born with that soul (spirit) and guess what, that is your birth Karmic Debt. Universal energy needs balancing for the purpose of healing and evolution. We are Spirits.

LAW OF CAUSE & EFFECT: What you have done unto others in past lives or this one (cause), weaves the karmic agreement of your present and future (effect). Consciously acting from love and kindness to yourself and others instantly bring the present and future karmic contracts into greater pathways of empowerment and unfoldment. How do we create Karmic Debt and why is it important to not become upset when we experience it?

Karmic Debt comes from the Universe, and everything from the Universe is all in love. Example, I can recall cheating on my ex-boyfriend years ago. Fast forward, when I dated my son's father, he cheated on me. Was I to be upset when I committed the same act years before? No, but I was as I didn't realize I created that debt. What's more, this was a man who slept with many women so what was I to expect. I got just what I deserved, but all in love. That particular part of my person was broken and filled with lies, betrayal, and deceit. The lesson for me was to remove those behaviors from my life, and I did. Can you see how cheating and being cheated on made me better? Karma is good for the soul; it is just a matter of how the PERSON decides to view it or connect to it. Allow your heart to connect, not your person.

We come to learn what is and is not like love. In the worlds of duality, (good & evil) we learn from “good-bad,” “problem-solution,” fear and doubts, etc. until we evolve into divine love, joy, and awareness. (ONLY ONE SOURCE)

Karmic Debt is here to serve us a purpose as we signed up and agreed to what we have, are, and will experience. It is critical NOT to react; as with everything we feel, say, or do, we make choices. Whatever you choose to do; produce a wave that travels through time; those choices are our Karma, good or bad. Let's go a little deeper.

Imagine the murder of a child. All those attached to that child will react in pain, anger, discord, guilt, and might even commit unhealthy acts. Let us pose this question. What if the "person" who carried the child's soul before the child "person" was born, committed murder? What if? What if the balancing the Universe's energy required the same act committed in the previous lifetime? How would you view this experience then?

What if the "person" I was before today had sex with children and wreaked havoc on them? What if? What would that person's Karma be if they lived to feel it? What if that person died before Karma balanced their soul's energy? Who would then receive that Karma? Me.

As a child, I was sexually molested. The Universal Law of Karma states that the same way the energy is put out into the world is the exact way it is returned. What you do to others will come back and be done to you. Karma is not just in your present life as it also applies to the lives you lived before the present one. One might find this hard to digest as we believe we are only five senses and that once we physically die, that is it. Energy is nor destroyed or created as it is only transferred. We are energy. If you understood that we are multi-sensory spirits, you would see that Karma never ends unless we accept responsibility for our thoughts, emotions, and actions and "allow it to be okay."

LAW OF EMPOWERMENT states that if you “let whatever happens to be ok,” you are accepting the “default” pattern of karma. Empowerment comes from a conscious decision to take control of karma by taking absolute and total responsibility for your life and by always consciously acting with loving kindness.

Everything that happens in our lives is for us as nothing is by chance, and nothing is for our demise. We have to trust the process of life as everything is where it should be and all through our creations. The Universe only provides love.

LAW OF LOVE – Karma begins and ends with love. Karma was created to propel you as a soul on a personal journey of reincarnation through the universe. Karma ends when you have perfected yourself in your ability to love unconditionally. The sole purpose of karma and reincarnation is to bring us all to a state of divine love, joy, and awareness.

EMBRACE YOUR KARMA and LIVE IN LOVE, JOY & AWARENESS

START YOUR HEALING TODAY

Contact me for more details.

773.419.3070

Healing the Mind, Body & Soul

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Self Reflection & Correction

2014-01-25T13:39:00.002-06:00

Thank you for stopping by as always, my goal is to empower and transform your life.

Throughout all my childhood abuse, the toxic relationships with my family, the abusive and/or bad relationships with men, I found my calling and passion. God blessed me with a life full of experiences that many are suffering from today. He not only blessed me, he healed and restored me. I am grateful to God and love Him so. I am nothing without God and I know that if you believe and trust in Him, He will do the same for you. I am a blessed and no longer a wounded woman seeking love, lacking esteem and respect. I am loved by God and myself.

Abuse tends to have an everlasting effect on victims and survivors, however once you become an adult; it is time to "do" the work. The work is self-reflection. You have to look back and deeply within and be totally honest with yourself about how the childhood abuse affected you. You may be a survivor, but is your heart ready and willing to receive and give love.

In order to stand in your truth and live an authentic life, you have to accept your ugly truth. If you are attracted to chaos and negativity, you have to accept it. If you don’t know what love was, accept it. If you think being slapped in the face or beaten is normal, accept it. If you lack self-esteem and self-love, admit it. If you are insecure, accept it. If you are desperate for a man, accept it. If you are afraid to be alone, accept it. You have to accept these patterns and behaviors because the only way to change is to make yourself aware of the problem. What's more, you have to be accountable for your actions.

As adults we make bad decisions and then we blame others. The moment you blame another for wreaking havoc on you, you deny yourself the opportunity to learn and grow. You have to be accountable for allowing someone to mistreat you. If you are in a domestic violent relationship or just a bad relationship and you have a way out, yet you choose to stay; be accountable. That’s not to say you deserve to be mistreated or abused, but it’s simply to say that you could have made a better decision. We all have choices and when you choose to see your faults, it is then that you will begin to grow. Self-reflection leads to self-correction, but the only way corrections can be made is if you stand in your truth and do the work.

Many of you think you can change a man or woman as I did. Wrong. The only person you need to focus on is yourself. When you begin to focus on changing others you lose your sense of self and with that, it’s impossible to see the patterns and behaviors that live within you. Change can only occur when we accept the fact that there is a problem. How you see and handle any relationship will either stunt or improve your growth. Until you are ready to self-reflect and embrace your ugly truth, I highly suggest the only person you date is yourself. Take some time to date and learn self or you will attract another bad relationship. You are what you attract. Dig deep and see exactly what you can do to make yourself better. Otherwise you will take the same person to the next relationship and you will have no one to blame, but yourself. You are not responsible for other’s action, but you are responsible for yours. Don’t worry about what the last man or woman did, worry about what you did or didn't do. People are who they were before you even crossed their paths. Therefore, their actions and behaviors have nothing to do with you and vice/verse.

Don’t walk away angry. When you walk away angry, you take that same anger to the next relationship and wreak havoc on someone who has nothing to do with your last man or woman. Anger will also block your blessings as an angry heart is incapable of seeing, embracing or accepting a blessing; such as a good man or woman. What’s more, an angry person lacks faith and love. How can you give someone your whole heart when you are angry? Walk away in peace and just know that God has something better for you. Wouldn't you rather walk away and suffer for five or ten months than to live the next five or ten years in pain with someone? That’s a question.

Being insecure is a sure way to run a man or woman away. Insecurities are unfortunate self-doubts either originating from growing up in a dysfunctional household or being betrayed and deceived as an adult. The unfortunate part is the behaviors that surface from these insecurities are projected onto an innocent individual and causes unnecessary pain. More than often these behaviors have nothing to do with the other person, but most will try to blame the other person. If you are questioning everything your man or woman does and they haven’t given you reason, you are insecure and needs to do a self-check.

Lacking self-love is a sure way to end up in a bad or abusive relationship. Why? Because you are confused about what love is and will accept anything. When you truly love yourself, you will not put yourself in harm’s way or allow anyone to mistreat you. Mistakes happen in relationships and sometimes you will get hurt, but you have to know the difference between love and abuse. In the end you have to make a conscious decision to move forward after being knocked down. It won’t happen overnight and it will not be easy. But, you can do it. Don’t look at how hard it is, look forward to meeting the person you will become. Move on with your life and work towards creating a new you. Remove the fear and break out into the person you were meant to be. God knows your beginning and end so now it is for you to self-reflect and discover the real you.

START YOUR HEALING TODAY

Contact me for more details.

773.419.3070

Healing the Mind, Body & Soul

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Sexual Abuse & Triggers

2012-02-29T09:23:00.000-06:00

Sexual abuse is a general term for any type of sexual activity inflicted on a child by someone with whom the child is acquainted. It is considered an especially heinous crime because the abuser occupies a position of trust. Experts on the subject estimate that more than 130,000 children a year are sexually abused in the United States. With that being said, most victims of sexual abuse have long-lasting effects called Triggers.

A Trigger is something that sets off a memory tape or flashback transporting the person back to the event of her/his original trauma. Triggers are very personal; different things trigger different people. Triggers can be something as simple as a candle, an odor, a place, a noise etc., and the emotions associated are buried deep within your subconscious mind. When the pain is not processed, these triggers will always be a big part of your life.

The Subconscious Mind – Reactive Mind

The subconscious mind stores all of your emotions, patterns, learned conditions and behaviors. It also takes up a large amount of space in our mind (80-90%) as compared to our conscious mind (2-10%). The subconscious mind is beneath our true self as it prevents us from moving forward, making great decisions, seeing the truth and succeeding in every area of our lives. Too many of us “live” or dwell in our subconscious and is controlled by it. You will no longer live in your subconscious mind. The subconscious mind is also directly connected to our physical and emotional well-being, and our ability to make conscious choices or decisions. Once we face and remove these learned conditions, emotions, patterns and behaviors, we can then see things clearly, thereby becoming conscious, making better decisions, and living our lives on purpose, and with passion. We can also prevent further manifestation in our physical as well as our emotional being. This is what I call self-reflection and correction, or removing the clutter; living with a free mind, and cleansed heart.

Triggers send you to the past experience and the emotions associated with the trigger are what makes the subconscious mind react and show up in your behavior as irrational. When pain and emotional experiences are not processed, managed and controlled it is the subconscious mind we react from as the subconscious mind is reactive and not conscious. How does this relate to triggers?

Example:

Your boyfriend has a history of child abuse. You had a disagreement; he disrespected you by calling you out of your name. After he stormed out of the house, you locked the door and put the latch on. He then kicked the door in and broke the latch. You discover later that his abuser locked him in a closet after she raped him.

Explanation:

His behavior of kicking the door in was based on his child molester locking him in a closet after she raped him. The locking of the closet door was the trigger and he reacted. He reacted from stored emotions surrounding his past abuse as he did not react from a simple disagreement in the current situation. Can you see this?

This is why it is so important to process, manage and control your emotions as the only way to conquer triggers is to go back and understand exactly what happened. You do not want to be controlled by your subconscious mind or unprocessed past emotions. With that being said, I will discuss one my past triggers after I was molested.

Nipple pinching- My abuser pinched my nipples while he molested me and it wasn't pleasing, I never understood the purpose then, but today I do. During sex, if my nipples were pinched, I cringed and was displeased. Nipple pinching literally took me back to when I was being molested. Today, nipple pinching is no longer a trigger. I am healed.

If you haven't healed from your abuse, you will come face to face with triggers and your decisions will be based on yesterday. Once you have defeated your past pain and experiences, triggers are obsolete as they no longer are considered “triggers” since there is no reaction. A trigger is only a trigger if the mind reacts and causes a behavioral reaction based on the emotions surrounding the trigger. If you were a victim of sexual abuse and are experiencing triggers, I urge you to avoid anything that may cause you to have these flash backs. Also, if the act of sex is a trigger; stop, get help and forgive your abusers. As time moves forward you may forget some and others you may not and that is okay. The goal is to forgive your abusers, become victorious and move forward. If you are experiencing any triggers and seeking assistance to move forward, please visit my website.

I am not only a Certified Life Coach, Author and Speaker; I have conquered thirty years of abuse; including incest, rape, sexual, physical, emotional, verbal abuse, and two domestic violence relationships. Today, my vision is to empower you to reach emotional freedom while gaining clarity and discovering your infinite possibilities.

START YOUR HEALING TODAY

Contact me for more details.

773.419.3070

Healing the Mind, Body & Soul

Subscribe to my You Tube Channel

Follow me on Twitter

Like My FB Page

Follow me on Instagram

Thank you for reading; please leave your comments below, follow and/or subscribe.