[Buzzfeed]

[OhGizmo!]

Olivia Wilde is one of the reason some dudes (like Dyna) watch House on Fox. Yes, it’s a good show…but don’t kid yourself. Ranking in at #8 on our Top 10 Chicks of Prime Time list (and admittedly deserving a higher rank), she’s also been called the doppelganger of Megan Fox. In fact, Miss Fox has somewhat of a girl-crush on Olivia. I believe the quote from GQ goes something like:

“I mean, I could see myself in a relationship with a girl — Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands. She’s mesmerizing.”

So, you’re welcome for that. Olivia Wilde is 25.

Bree Turner is a dancer-turned actress. She danced in the background in films like The Big Lebowski, Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me, and She’s All That. Then her first speaking role was in Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo and she’s since appeared in a bunch of other comedies and such. She’s 32.

[Olivia Wilde and Bree Turner on Chickipedia]

“I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”

I said “WHAT??!! What was that?!”

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear… “You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’d just buy them all.

She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.” She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.”

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.”

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?”

I then said “honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.” And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”

Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either.”

You’d have to be one hell of a geek to drop $30-$40 on a bottle of Star Trek-branded fragrance. I guess with the new movie coming out this year, the marketers are out in force trying to get the brand in your face. But seriously…cologne? I guess Captain Kirk had to smell pretty good when he was seducing green women. If it’s good enough for Bill Shatner, count me in.

[OhGizmo!]

Anyways, if you could take a second and go vote for us, that would rule. This thing has been going on for about a month now and they’ve narrowed it down to 8 bands. Voting for this round only lasts through Sunday, March 8th so if you’re going to do it, do it quickly! If we move on to the next round, that will begin on Monday the 9th and there will only be 4 bands left. Here’s the link to vote. Just click the bubble next to “Megaphone - Gravitate” (you can listen to the track if you like), fill in a valid email address at the bottom, then watch your inbox for the confirmation email. The vote won’t count until it’s confirmed and it may go to a spam box so look hard for it! Also, if you wouldn’t mind getting some friends to vote too, that would be great. Thanks!

While I commend the neighbor for trying to save a rape victim, I have two questions: What’s with the sword? And what the hell kind of porn is that guy watching that it sounds like rape? That’s just wrong. You can check out the local news report (which the reporters seem to find fairly humorous) at the source.

[BuzzFeed]