BaBoYnALuMiLiPaD

2024 and it's the almost end of February.. hmmmm..

2024-02-28T00:41:00.002+08:00

Yeah hmmm... 2024.. the last time I updated this blog was year 2021 and I wasn't able to finish it.. and yes until now i've forgot how to attach a pic.. so yeah. Its February 28, 2024, Wednesday and it's almost 1 am.. I'm still charging my phone (battery was used up by my "makulit" na nephew Zaijan, and he's now sleeping beside me here in our Bagong Silang residence..)

I don't know somehow i have forgotten all my password and i had to retrieve them all over again.. Luckily I was able to recover my old emails.. maybe i'll have to go back and update u again next time.. i still have work later this morning.. so yeah good nightttt! or morning rather!!

and Hey 2024.. not a good year for me so far. bye!

Hello 2021! Miss me?

2021-08-01T06:21:00.003+08:00

Hi it's August 1, 2021 and im just about to sleep, it's already 6am and i just tried to retrieve my old email addresses and remembered that this is linked to my many blogger profiles haha., So yeah it's been sooooo long, I almost want to delete all my pics on here cause most of my posts about my lovelifes and stupidities were all embarrassing 😄 Yeah younger me. This blog is like 12-13 years now? So yea looking forward to write here again, though i know blog is kinda ignored nowadays, it's 2021! Different times, new generation and technologies.. Facebook, Youtube, Tiktok, Instagram, Twitter are the "in" thing now,. Gone are the days I still use Friendster, Myspace, Yahoo Messenger and MSN.. And that added a decade on my age!

Speaking of which i think i have to sleep na for i don't want my old to regret it in the morning,. Oh it's already morning haha,. Oh well it's Sunday so whatever😁

Kkkk. Bye!

PS:

Ugh i forgot how to attach a pic.

MEET ME HALFWAY

2012-06-13T22:12:00.003+08:00

If you're not interested, tell me now so I won't have to waste anymore of my time. But if you are, put in some effort and prove to me that you want this as bad as I do because im tired of fighting for something that may never be. I wish you'd understand that being the best one is meaningless to me when I'm not the only one. For such a smart guy, you sure are dense. This is ridiculous, I shouldn't have to compete for your love when I'm here giving you my all. It's not like I'm asking for much, I just want to know that you care, that you've acknowledged everything I've been doing. To truly love someone, is to put their feelings before your own, and that's true for the most part, but I can't cater to your every need. But I know that if I keep putting myself first i'll only succeed in pushing you away.

I guess, at the end of it all, I have closure even if it isn't what I wanted. If someone doesn't care about me or won't make any efforts to show that they do, then it really isn't worth it in the long run. it just sucks to want something so badly, but having to concede to have nothing at all. I'm partially sorry for lashing out at you. I'm also partially sony for wasting my time. I don't want to characterize it as such - time wasting and all I want to reflect on this as a lesson learned and a period in my life where I lived "in the moment!' Sadly, I cannot. The way I see it, however, is that I did myseff a great disservice, and at least now I can heal on my own.

I want a platonic relationship

2012-03-03T23:59:00.002+08:00

On Sat, Mar 3, 2012 at 5:47 AM, Mj Uzumaki <mjuzumaki@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> Lately.,ive been thinking "why is that some guys will just text u,call
> u or hangout with u if he only likes u.,?" i know ive whined about
> love in d past.,there were times that i felt a bit desperate looking
> for d right one.,but since im a gemini, change is the only constant
> thing in my life..yesterday i want a lover,NOW im not in d mood to be
> inlove.,i just want to enjoy hanging out with someone.,talking with
> them.,laughing,being silly.,like when im with my girl friends.,in
> short,.I WANT A PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP.,
>
> a kind of relationship where u care bout each other but not as
> bf/gf.,just because he/she is ur friend.,no expectations.,no rules.,no
> conditions.,no sexual desire.,no lies., but its kinda hard to get.,Q_Q
>
> for example this guy.,we've been friends for like 3yrs now.,he's one
> of my good friends who's always there to console me.,i owe him a lot d
> last time i was down because of Phijay.,(early Feb2012).,i sent him a
> txt msg around 3 or 4am and he called me up immediately..though i
> didn't take his call,cause at that time im not really in d mood to
> speak with someone.,maybe i just need a soundboard.,but still he keeps
> on texting and calling me.,i find it nice of him talaga.,he's
> funny,super nice and sweet.,but i don't know..i just wish he'll stay
> that way na lang.. I find it awkward kasi when sometimes he's being
> too sweet to me.,,im not dense naman.,i
> find it weird whenever he says im cute.,even my "big nose" he calls it
> cutie nose" hahahaha., :)) though i should be flattered that someone
> appreciates me despite my flaws...he's too good of a friend to be my
> bf.,correction: i want him to remain as my close friend.. Maybe i used to consider him as a bf because he's smart and all.,but i only see him now
> as a buddy,and i hope he feels d same way.,i don't wanna lose him as
> a friend cause its hard to find a good guy like him.,not
> maniac.,sensible and stuffs.,
>
> although i know that its too good to be true.,that's why it kinda
> sucks when ur comfortable with a guy that u can be urself,be
> funny.,then emo d next.,without any pretensions.,and u not having to
> impress him.,u can act silly around,.be sweet.,then all of a sudden
> it'll all be awkward,cause he'll like u.,suddenly ur not just a
> friend.. I wish we could stay friends..i wish guys would hangout with
a girl not for anything.,not because he's gay,.not because he likes d
> girl.but just because he wants to have another "crazy girl FRIEND".,:)
>
> On a 2nd thought,.that also brought me into conclusion,that a lot of
> times when u see a guy as a friend.,we girls show the real us.,but
> when we like a guy or have a crush on him, we tend to impress him to
> the point of faking it, just for him to take notice and like us., and
> rarely it works.,and even if ur "small roleplaying" works.there's
> always the time when our real selves will creep in,then we'll become a
> monster in disguise in their eyes., Lesson: always be who you
> are.,don't pretend to be someone for him to like u.,cause a guy who
> really loves u will love that "creepy and crazy gal" inside u.,:)

Wrote this ng maalimpungatan ako after a weird dream..:P

My Alternative Songs Month

2012-02-21T01:17:00.002+08:00

the angels they burn inside for us

are we ever

are we ever gonna learn to fly

the devils they burn inside of us

are we ever gonna come back down

come around

I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold

I consider this month of February as my "my alternative songs month"..why? cause i was soo sad (not anymore) ayun this song "Angels and Demons" by Dishwalla caught my interest..,along with the other old stuffs.,like "I Think God Can Explain by Splender".,"Look After You by The Fray" and a host of others..(click this ALTERNATIVE to listen to the songs ) Pinapakinggan ko siya noon everytime i feel sad and wanna reflect.,it helped.,kaso lalo lang ako nasa-sad that time kaya hindi ko muna sila pinakinggan.,but now that im feeling better.,ayun ok na :)

What i like about these songs aside from the melody syempre are the lyrics.,its totally what i felt at that time.,and mga gusto ko sabihin.,lyrics is important to me bago ko mgustuhan yung song.,kaya aun.,:)

Angels and Demons..yung time that im still depressed

I think God can Explain...when i finally learned to accept and let go.,.,ill just let God do his will i guess.,this song kinda made me stronger.,and helped me to move on :)

It's all right, I'm O.K.,

I think God can explain,

I believe I’m the same,

I get carried away

It's alright, I'm O.K.,

I think God can explain

I'm relieved, I'm relaxed,

I'll get over it yeah.

How many boyfriends you've had??

2012-02-21T00:27:00.002+08:00

A lot of times i got ask "how many boyfriends you've had in the past?" Im sure someone had ask you the same question..Some would answer "just a few" or "nope i've never had one" (ay bongga maria clara c ate!)..A few (mostly guys) would brag about how many girls they've managed to get laid in the past.,(honestly guys its not a turn on..). But most of us always choose the safest answer answer "i don't know hindi naman ako nagbibilang".

In the past,.gamit na gamit ko yung last answer..maybe because ayaw ko lang mg-elaborate too much.,or i was afraid that someone might think i have lots of experience.,i know it sucks -_-.,but its a fact.,A lot of people thinks that a girl who had a lot of bf must have a lot of sexual encounters.,so judgemental right? Not all are maniacs.,LOL.,! and not all relationships naman consider sex as the cohesive tape between two partners.,might be true in most cases but not always..

Oh well my Gemini thingy kicked again.,im losing my point lol.,im here to tell you what's my answer to the question i mentioned before.,"how many boyfriends did i have?" .,Like what ive said i used to give the safest answer.,but that was before.,Cause for the past 2yrs and a half of being single i realized i only had ONE boyfriend in my entire life.,

Yeah some of the peeps who asked find my answer a bit weird..Some of my friends would even say "aw don't believe her, she had lots! " Yeah im not saying i only had one guy.,they're right i had lots..don't get me wrong.,im not implying that im pretty ha! how i wish LOL!..im just average.,not the type of girl na "mapapa-second look" ka.,but i guess its because when i was still young i was pretty active in the dating scene.,not active like grabbing a guy and have some "fun" thing okay?? What i mean is when i was young i had this crazy pattern which im not proud of.,I know a lot of people na meron den nitong pattern na to.,

Here's the pattern : When you were young and your steady bf/gf are breaking up or close to breaking up..lots of times there's always the "reserba" guy/girl..and this "reserba" might be the reason you guys are breaking or migt come after your relationship ended..,but whichever.,this "reserba" is the next person you'll have a relationship with.,if you're the one who cheated, he/she is your "kabet" of some sort.,If ur the brokenhearted one, this person is ur "panakip butas"..You get what i mean? Im not saying the "kabet" or 3rd party is always the bad one okay? He/she might be super awesome that you chose to him/her over the one you're with..(teka nalalayo na naman ako) What im pointing is, when we were young we tend to engage ourselves to a "rebound relationship".,(ill tackle this one on my future post) SO because of this rebound thing, which is like "jumping from one relationship to another"., i had lots of guys...(actually not lots naman, i know others have tons lol)

Of course i had strong feelings for these guys.,AT THAT TIME ha.. we said iloveu's.,cared for each other.,the usual bf/gf thing.,ive left some of them and broke their hearts which made them hate me at that time (hehehe nagmaganda eh no)..,But of course,there were also those wo left me and made me stay awake,crying all night ng bongga.,these guys are the one whom i thought i really love.,cause when someone left you,its automatic that you'll feel like "OMG i can't lose him,i love him so much.," OR "i beg you fate,bring him back.,cause i won't ever love this way again"..blah blah blah., Sometimes i'll even tell that person who broke my heart "I won't ever forget you for the rest of my life.." LOL.,now that i think about it,i realized im full of crap! haha., Maybe i meant those words at that time.,i even remember being heartbroken for this one guy (Naruto) for a year.,it even affected my work till i left my job.,cause i was sooooo depress talaga.,(he's the reason why i started this blog years ago.,) Cause i was so heartbroken i needed an outlet,.i said ill give my all just to get him back....

But you know what?? All these guys i said i loved (including Naruto)..none of them ang kino-consider ko as my boyfriend or ex now...except ONE..my longest relationship with Mr.Babyface..(corny codename eh,lol.,i can't
think of any that would describe him) So yeah Mr.Babyface is my longest one..my first relationship was 1year then some just lasted for months.,but Babyface and I were together for 5yrs...tagal no? I know its still kinda short but we're just bf/gf at that time.,not "living together-bf-gf".,so its still an achievement.,but i left him..

NOTE:

(teka inaantok na ko.,actually this post is from my phone.,i wrote this February 5 i think..,not knowing na ilang days pagkatapos ko itype to,makikita ko ang old diary ng ex q n c Phijay (yep xa si Babyface) and will realized that i still care for him pala.,after 3yrs of my soul wandering,..i broke up with him 3yrs ago, and thought that hindi ko naman n xa mahal na.,i was wrong...kea nagkulong me ata for 4days sa kuwarto lol., (i lost 5pounds tuloy!haha) for the longest time,..nun lang me ule umiyak.,soooo yeah maybe xa paren ayt? ayun nililipat ko lang tong post q d2.,actually mahaba p 2.,kaso tamad n me mgtype...-_- and oh! after a week of pagmumukmok im ok naman na.,made some rationalization kaya eto im back to my old happy self again! kaso antok n qoh,migraine pa.,cge will continue this next time!CIAO)

Life goes on..

2012-02-20T22:31:00.000+08:00

"You can shed tears that he is gone, or you can smile because he has lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back, or you can open your eyes and see all he has left.

Your heart can be empty because you can't see him, or you can be full of the love you shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember him only that he is gone, or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back.

Or you can do what he would want: SMILE, OPEN YOUR EYES, LOVE and GO ON."

no copyright intended

ANOTHER VALENTINE...

2012-02-19T00:07:00.003+08:00

ayun another valentines had pass..2010..2011..2012..loveless ang lola mo..! LOL.,although its not much of a big deal naman.,.technically i think i spent valentines without a guy for 5yrs talaga.,cause the first two years eventhough im still with Phijay, he wasn't here naman because of his work.,soooo it means 5 consecutive years na aqong ZERO! no letter.,no card.,no cake.,no flower.,no gift.,no iloveu's.,hehehe.,so wawa.,

though someone asked me for a date naman.,kaso i don't know..sometimes gusto ko na sapukin sarili ko.,why can't i even go to a "friendly date".,sobrang tinatamad talaga ako.,specially when i don't feel anything naman with the guy.,i don't wanna lead him on.,sayang naman ang effort at money nea right?? but the downside..its like im limiting myself.,instead of widening my horizon, ako naman yung tanggi ng tanggi.,to think na wala naman akong karapatang maging "choosy" cause sabi nga ng quotes "choosy ka pa,juicy ka ba?" LOL.,im not naman.,kaso don't know maybe gaya ng sabi ko sa isang guy friend.,as u get older u tend to be a bit picky.,ang hirap ng mainlove.,or kiligin.,BLAME THE HORMONES!

but going back.,im still happy! cause i was able to spend my vday with my family! :) 2009-2011 i spent it with my friends.,umalis den naman kmi ng family.,but this year 2012.,its exclusively for my family lang.,we ate out and konting pasyal (nasira nga lang diet ko) sobrang pagod.,nakatulog agad kami as soon as we
got home..i wasn't able to go to my friend's house sa sobrang pagod.,but its cool.,i love spending time with my Papa,Mama,Ate and my pamangkinz naman :)

Next Year 2013...oh well! by hook or by crook.,ill have a date na.,and ugh i wish ill get a bouquet of flowers! .,ewan ko ba.,kahit d last time that someone gave me ng bouquet my mama told me "makakain mo ba yan?" basta gusto ko pa ren nun.,! I envy kasi yung ibang girls when they get a flower kahit nde vday.,:( wala na kasi si Phijay para magbigay ng flowers.,(scripted pa yun hahaha) I remember my ex Chad gave me one noon,ayy suprised talaga ang lola mo.,its soooo big and super nice.,soooo sweet! before that i didn't know ganun pala yun, i thought corny kasi..but hinde! A bear or any other stuff will do ren.,lol DEMANDING? ahhh basta.,i'll find that sweet guy ule.,hinde na ko tatamarin! You'll see.,next year,iba na nakasulat here :)

AJA AJA FIGHTING v ^_^

Mind Over Matter..

2012-02-13T01:40:00.000+08:00

I don't want to mind the matter lol..wow my english is so deep,i can't swim!

oh well,this past few weeks..lage ako sinersuman ng nanay ko na ayusin ang aking closet..well actually i like to keep it organized naman..kaso minsan ewan q ba sa mga kapatid qoh ginagawang taguan yung aparador qoh.,or minsan naman kumukuha ng damit ng walang paalam (yung mga old tees qoh na mejo small pa ung size..) i know..sabi ni mama nde q nman na sinusuot..eh kaso im still hoping na papayat pa qoh lol.,anu bah?! so yeah..

last night..im challenging myself.,cause u know i have this "weird talent",talent b un? actually its not yet confirmed pa but wala lang i just wanna try it lang.,and my weird thingy ay related sas paranormal i think? i don't really know what's the right term.,but i guess its like "ESP" (extra sensory perception)..,actually since i was a kid.,i had these "weird hunches".,not really like a premonition..kasi wala naman akong nakikita..but whatever.,ayun nung bata pa lang ako..ahmm there was this old neighbor na may sakit and i told myself that he won't last long.,

teka.,tom na lang.,its 1:28 am here.,mejo lumamig.,kinabahan bgla lola mo lol.,cge takutin ba sarili!.,tom q nlng tpusin to! mahirap na :P

Lessons in Life

2012-02-10T10:38:00.000+08:00

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You'll have your heart broken and you'll break others' hearts. You'll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you'll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone's hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back.

I Love to Hate You

2012-02-09T22:50:00.003+08:00

Me after meeting a pathological Liar..>my Ego hurts >Hate > Indifference > Amused :)

Dear Mr.Lemon,

I could say a lot of hate words that can make you wince.,but i'd rather not.,i just want you to know that you really amused me.,lol.,thanks for the entertainment.,but i kinda pity ur gf for having a guy like u..tsk tsk

In just one snap

2012-02-06T03:27:00.014+08:00

Funny when the one thing that you thought doesn't matter to you for years..could make you feel like you just wanted to die in just one snap..,

I just woke up around 3am and this random thought suddenly came to my head... thinking of Phijay .,i wish i could turn back the time..so i could take back my words..that i wanna be free from him..it sucks that after 3yrs of not caring, i just found myself missing him.,why now ko lang na-realized how great his love was for me...?? just hurt a lot that i wanna die ( not literally though,msakit weh) in sleep...hope this is just for now..

Misery

2012-02-05T11:10:00.000+08:00

Misery loves company. Don't let miserable people suck the happiness out of your life.

First Rant "Should You Check Your Partners Cellphone/Facebook?"

2012-02-05T10:00:00.005+08:00

Hi girls! I'm Mr.NotSoGoodGuy and apparently this is my first post. I'm not really good in this thing cause i'm a lazy ass,(rather play on my PS3 gah!) but Fickle asked me to do this, cause she said i need some release too hahaha! and yeah to give a guy's point of view here..

Oh well, you guys don't know but i just got out of a bad break up recently. Really really bad, that i'm starting to get scared with the girls! lol kidding..You see, this girl i used to hang out with for like a month, started showing signs of being crazy..Suddenly she wants to get all my passwords..on my email, Facebook (which she gladly deactivated after we broke up ) my phone password and would you believe even my game accounts!!?? Crazy right??

Yes it was really crazy but come to think of it..now that i try to look back and think of my reaction at that time..maybe she really have a reason to be suspicious.. Honestly, i kinda regret
that i snapped at her.maybe we would still be together now.. I don't really had some issues with my past ex gf's if they'll open my account..Really. But at that time that i was with my last ex..I am kinda flirting with this girl from my school..We texted and exchange a few messages on FB..That's the time i decided to change my passwords and put a pin on my phone, just to avoid my gf's eye..But like what they always said, the truth will come out, no matter how good you are in keepin' it..

Blah-blah-blah-blah..blah..

To make the story short. and to answer the question "Should you check your partners cp/fb?" Ok in my opinion as a guy (i am not speaking in behalf of the other guys,they might have another say to this) BUT in my opinion, YES, you should respect the privacy of your partner. YES, you should trust him. Cause sometimes us guys tend to get scared with girls who are very controlling and jealous. BUT in case you asked if you can check his cellphone and he freaked out or snapped at you in an instant..OR didn't give it to you outright..then maybe you really have a reason to get suspicious..Cause as much as i value my privacy, if i am not doing anything wrong behind my girl's back, I don't have any reason to hide my stuffs from her.. And if I really do love her, i wouldn't want her to doubt me even a bit..so i'll be gladly to sacrifice my so-called "privacy" just to prove to her that i'm not doing anything bad. And with that maybe she'll trust me more..

Just tips girls..(i am not bias, this also goes to 3rd sex relationships) so girls and gay guy..if you're planning to be a spy..act cool..learn to read your man's reaction. and please stop acting like you're going C-R-A-Z-Y..you'll just waste your energy..just be calm..be observant and the truth will always come out..Peace, outta here!

you can also leave a comment, you can also suggest some topics,questions or whatever.and again sorry for the typos, not trying to be an ass but oh well i guess i am an ass, hope i didn't offend anyone aight! Good day!

Appreciating Sadness

2012-02-04T11:03:00.001+08:00

Sometimes when im feeling okay.,i find it a lil boring.,don't get me wrong,im a happy person.,i love being happy.,but sometimes i kinda miss being sad.,the feeling of being heartbroken.,cause it is when i appreciate the lyrics of a song.,it motivates me to write and express my feelings.,it reminds me to appreciate what i have over what i need.,sadness makes me aware that even if someone left, the real people who loves me are still there.,sadness makes me thankful for my family and friends who embrace me with their unconditional love especially when im in my lowest moment., Being sad doesn't necessarilymake you an emo.,being sad is a form of connecting to your innerself., discovering yourself.,and knowing the importance of the people who really matters.,See? Its not that bad.,

2012-02-04T02:19:00.002+08:00

Now.,I might be crazy thinking bout you.,while ur busy thinking of
someone else.,
Now.,You must be very happy taking care of her heart, while ur breaking mine.,
Now.,I maybe holding on to your promise while u've already forgotten
all about it.,
But time is my friend.,
Tomorrow you'll see.,
Everything will change.,and my feelings is no exception.,
Just watch me..

Crazy thoughts 1

2012-02-03T10:59:00.001+08:00

"..have u ever think of me even once? You may not be in my thoughts as much as before,.but every now and then, especially when im alone.,i sometimes thinks of u.,i want to convince myself that you're just busy
with some stuffs.,but do you think its an excuse enough.,? "

Journal hopping

2012-01-31T07:17:00.001+08:00

Nope.,not d usual blog hopping where i go to one blog to another.Remember last night i was hoping to find an online notepad..why? Causei can't open my Penzu diary on my phone.,although i do have mypersonal blog on blogger ( d mother of all my blogs,cause i have lots)its not working as well on my cp whenever i try to compose one.,i waslosing hope n tlga.,even tumblr doesn't like me:( so then i decidedto just settle with a downloadable diary like my old one efficient diary.,but then again im still skeptical den kc what if ma-wipe outang memory q.,so i searched for top blogsites.,it gave me livejournal.,i transferred my posts on penzu one by one.,a bittedious.,then i found out they're not really for free and the layout kinda bored me.,so i went back to blogger again.,good thing,they have email2blogger.,not sure if if that's the right term.,but that means ican just type it on my email then it'll automatically publish my postafter sending it to a certain addy.,im currently doing it now butstill have to struggle with char limitation.,hahaizt.,how i wish ihave a smartphone,even the cheapest one.,-_-

My not-so very first entry

2012-01-30T19:14:00.001+08:00

This is my first time using this.,i used to have an online notepad but i guess they shut it down.,i also have an online diary at penzu but unfortunately i can't access it here on my mobile.,so yeah im trying diz stuff.,facebook notes naman kainis.,after a long paragraph ill soon find out that it would be cut in half.,hopefully this one won't disappoint me.,i really need a good online notepad cause every now and then a thought will just popped out from my mind.,and im not always infront of the pc naman.,or aun naputol...kaasar d ba? haha oh well ill paste this na lang sa livejournal..ugh

~imported this from an online notepad..kalimutan q na anu un..

MY SIMPLE ROOM TRANSFORMATION

2011-12-25T07:36:00.002+08:00

in exchange of my wish PSP/netbook this christmas, i decided to just ask my Papa to build me a little room.,(our house is just small)..soo after buying some of the equipments and with my Papa & Mama's help (and my nephews too) i was able to do my lil project.,my christmas gift for myself ..=)

took 2 months though cause my Papa can only work on it on Sundays.,and hey i did all the painting and decorating.,took me 2 whole days to finish the painting of the wall and the ceilings...didn't know its that hard..i wasn't able to open my right hand that much because it hurts :( but lol its worth it! so here's the pic when its still super "kawawa" (ugly and messy) till it was done..its not that super okay..just simple..but i still love it.,♥

First Day: October 2011

what a pity sight lol., my papa started building the skeleton..=] my niece Ali messing with my Papa's work

2nd Day : till the 3rd day, put some directory papers stuff on my ceiling to hide the imperfections and dust..such a tedious job..!

i also made this some sort of a string lamp for my light..not a perfect round shape though :P

Day 3 : around November i think..i made this sketch for a shelf i would like to have :)

my sample shelf, i used my fave child actor's pic, Zaijan hehe :P my papa started making the shelf

now its done! put it up on the wall..!

Day 4: Around December, now it's my turn to paint the whole thing up! was excited at first, dying after long hours of painting lol! :D

what i used : 2 cans of white paint ( flatwall for the primer & semigloss for the final coating)

2 small tinting color ( yellow and red )

1 mini rolling brush

(had to remove all the figurines and stuffs..will just put it back after)

my not so pretty walls

after painting the primer...ahmmm okay lang?

for Final Coat : tried mixing peach color and oh i also painted my ceiling with flatwall

and here's the final coat! a glossy one! :)

Day 5: Had to wait for the paint to dry..and then i moved on to putting some old and new stuffs back :)

i just used linoleum for flooring since my room is just small, no need for bed frame

put some curtains..

placed my books and some of my collections

and VOILA! my new room! ^_^

December OverHaul!

2011-12-04T03:06:00.002+08:00

well it's been soooo long since my last post here.,i don't know why..maybe i just like writing when im brokenhearted lol.,and im not sure if its a good thing or not, cause that means i am not "duguan" when it comes to love.,just plainly single.,no hang ups, no worries.,i am happy though.:)

so anyways Christmas is coming and i guess i need to update my blog on what happened to me this past few months.,well just two things actually, last month (November 21) i had a minor surgery (again after 4yrs)..and i was really excited cause i'm the type of person who really loves testing myself when it comes to pain..but my god, "masakit siya teh!!" i mean i thought im gonna go crazy in pain, cause the anesthesia wore off in the middle of the incision so i had to bear the pain throughout the whole operation....:( and now i don't like to be even go back for a check up..bad experience..-_-

going back..so it's the 4th of December, only 21 days before my christmas...i wasn't able to buy my christmas wish..a new PSP..:( cry cry...(cause i had to sell my psp last yr for my tuition.heartbreaking..ugh) cause i decided to
have my room fixed..actually my first actual room..cause i used to share mine with my 2 sisters and nephews...now im all alone! ( not exactly cause i asked my nephew Jusper to sleep with me,cause im scared of sleeping alone..-_-) The room's a bit messy when my papa first started building it, i had to put paper stuffs in the ceiling just to make it a bit presentable,took me 2 days!!

soooo yeah last Nov.30 and yesterday i bought some stuffs for my room! (its a bit small,like a cupboard lol.,i call it Harry Potter room cause its soooo small, but i still love it! ) It's a bit tiring but oh well, im EXCITED to see what it'll looks like before xmas :) i also bought some anime figures and i think it would be cool to collect them..i only bought 4 for now....ugh can't let go of my inner child.!

BUT! lastly, i want to thank my Papa for building me my room..and for the patience cause i always bugged him especially when its Sunday and he got no work.,and for my Mama for helping me to shop for stuffs that i'll need, and for sewing my bedsheet and curtains! i love them! Tomorrow's a big day! making shelves!

all about me..

2011-10-18T08:27:00.006+08:00

I saw this question and answers stuff on my drafts.,i don't know when i answered this..i just find it funny how bitter i was lol...this must be 2 or 1 yr ago..not sure..

If you could be stranded with one person for 24 hours who would it be?
* ndi na kailangan itanong yan
What is the hardest thing for you to say?
* goodbye and sorry
Do you remember your 1st crush?
* ahmmm yeah ung neighbor nmen hehhe
Have you ever flown a kite?
* tried.,msarap.,kso kkangalay.,
When was the last time that you went swimming and where?
* last march.,office outing
Do you consider yourself successful?
* uhmm not really.,have a lot of plans pa
Have you ever asked for a horse?
* nope :)) mhal kea nun.,hahah!
What did you do this past weekend?
* chat.,chat..,chat.,text..text.,text.,
Miss being at school right now?
* sobraaa!! im planning to study ule if my stable job na
Do you want to
be single?
* yeah its cool to be single.,no worries
How are you feeling today?
* okay, i guess
Have you ever been suspended or expelled from school? why?
* nope.,bait me noh
Do you bite your nails?
* when i was young
Can you handle the truth?
* ahm not all the time.,sometimes its hard for me to digest it
What 3 things do you always bring with you to places?
* phone,kikay kit.,and perfume
What's your deepest secret?
* bkt ko nmn e.ppost dto lol :P
Do you believe in love?
* yeah.,but not now
Is there something you want that you can't have?
* yeah .,that's life
Who did you last hug?
* he's not here
Where is your phone?
* ambot nlng asa na to =))
What was the last thing you ate?
* chicken neck..again! :D:))
What song are you listening to?
* because im a girl.,by kiss
Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
* welter, my classtmate from highschool sa cp

This survey gets a little personal can you handle it?
**Hit me

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette
** i don't smoke weh
Are you single/ taken / heart broken/ confused?
** cool to be single
Do you get along with girls?
** Yeah. why not?
Do you think somebody loves you?
** maybe.. i ain't that unlovable. haha.
Is it easy to make you cry?
** ahm nah.,maipon me ng tears,.kea bigla buhos
How do you feel when someone kisses you on the forehead?
** ahm naiinlove me,.the sweetest kiss for me isa sa forehead.,
Do you find it hard to trust others?
** It was never easy.
Do you like using big words?** Just to impress people? No. Babaw naman.
Do you care too much/ not at all/ just enough?
** He knows.
Have you ever had depression?
** yes.,but ahm sndali lng
Do you love someone?
** ahmm b4?
What if I told you that you were pretty?
** I know--since birth, :P joke lng ah.,wla q piso!un lng
Do you get jealous easily?
** Oh yes.pero d q agad pkita
What about mad?
** nope.,when i trust the person nde me mdali mgalit
What about upset?
** same
How fast does your mood change?
** moody lng me pag inlove.,pasaway kc
How often do you cry?
** ahmmm gusto q umiyak ng umiyak.,pero im controlling it
Ever found out the person you cared most about doesn't care about you the same way or anymore?
** ahm yeah.,he lied to me
How does it feel to be heart broken?
** Empty.
Are you afraid to tell your true feelings?
** No.
Can you honestly say you' re okay right now?
** Maybe
Do you tell people you' re okay when you' re really not?
** Lot of times
Why do you think so many people cheat on their bf/ gf?
** something's missing sa relationship
Are you afraid of getting cheated on?
** been there,done that
Tell me what's on your mind?
** ung answer sa question n2.,hehe
If you could make your lips bigger, would you?
** haha! nah yaw q nga.,contented with my lips
Do you know anyone that drinks?
** i know a lot.
How many people do you trust?
** konti lng
Are you happy with your life?
** yeah new start.,
``Do you have a friend that you've known since you were little?
** Yeah.mdami
`What do you usually do first in the morning?
** open my eyes.. :p
`Is being single fun?
** ahm yeah.,free as a bird
`What color are your eyes?
** black d bgay blue weh.
`Will you talk to someone on the phone tonight?
** ahmm yeah sa cellphone.,im gonna call a friend.,promise me weh
`Can you honestly say looks don't matter?
** No. We live in a superficial world and that's a fact.
`Was today a good day?
** hmmm.ahmmm much better than yesterday.,when all lies as in lumutang tlga
`What were you doing last night at midnight?
** texting my friend
`Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
** When shared with ur true love,yes. :)
`If you were to die today would your life be complete?
** NOOOOOOOO. :(
`Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?
** my relatives :p
`Where will you be in 2 hours?
** still here.,chatting with my friends
`What are you doing tomorrow?
** work
`Which girl' s house was the last you spent the night at?
** ahmm can't remember
`Do you have a ceiling fan in your room?
** I do not have a room
`Next time you will kiss someone?
** when i find the RIghT ONE.,
`Ever told someone you loved them and meant it?
** Of course.i dont say it when i dont mean it.,

WHAT A CRAZY DREAM

2011-09-19T07:50:00.002+08:00

Yesterday afternoon as i was sleeping..i had a dream..(expect it to be a weird one..oh well all dreams are weird anyway..) sooo yeah..one thing i really love bout sleeping is DREAMING..its like a "free movie" wherein you're the lead character.,funny when sometimes in your dreams you'll encounter individuals you haven't seen in your entire life..(although i've read that all the people you see in your dreams even if u don't know them or they're not familiar to you, the fact is you've seen that person once in your life ,might be someone from your school, or someone you've seen while you're in a bus, etc. ) One time i had a dream that my boyfriend is this
one HOT hollywood actor lol ( then most of the time my phone under my pillow will ring as we were about to kiss.,grrrrrr! >.< )

So going back, yesterday afternoon i had this one dream..in my dream my bangs hides my face a bit so some of the people mistaken me for this one actress..guess who..?! its so funny..Iwa Moto! ( she'll kill me lol, actually i don't know why Iwa Moto,she's not even my idol but the funny thing was..she's so pretty, baka mas maganda pa saken patay na kuko ni Iwa, hahahaha! ) Anyways, in this dream there were 3 couples who visited me daw in our house, they were all good looking..the guys are hot and the girls are all polished.,They payed me a visit cause im their idol daw cause im soooo pretty..but they didn't know its because im hiding my face...then when i accidentally flicked my hair, they saw the "real me"...the "not so pretty me" ...so they were disappointed if not disgusted and made rude remarks..like "omg you're a fake! your not even pretty! " ...Of course i was hurt then i told them " you guys are all superficial, so what if im not pretty, u can all get out of my house! "....i was crying because of embarrassment., so they all stood up and left but this one guy hesitated at first...but he went out of the room den eventually..i was left crying upstairs daw...

Then as i was crying, i heard a guy singing..,soooo i got curious and went downstairs...and there he was..(the one guy who hesitated to leave..) He's singing this song while looking at me and the lyrics left a mark in my heart...

You're my piece of mind, in this crazy world

You're every thing I've tried to find

Your love is a pearl

You're my Mona Lisa

You're my rainbow skies

And my only prayer is that you realize

You'll always be beautiful in my eyes...

I thought my heart will melt then he walked towards me and hugs me daw...and told me " you might not be the prettiest girl in the world, who got long legs, small waist or perfect skin.. but for me you're the most beautiful one, remember that.." it made me cry even more, not because im still feeling insecure or sad, but because it touches my heart and made me realize that someone appreciates me for who i am...i won't ever forget that dream...even though i wasn't able to recognize that mystery guy it felt so real..i feel loved..but then again..

it was just a dream..

The lesson : i've learned that i may not be perfect but im still beautiful inside and i don't have to pretend to be someone else cause someone will see and love me for the real me..we just have love and appreciate who we are, we're all beautiful in our own way :)

WORKKKKKKKKKKK

2011-09-09T21:50:00.003+08:00

oh well.,im back again.,im recording the audiobook of Paper Towns by John Green..kea bawal me mg-ingay here sa pc..kea eto i decided to write here nlng since matagal na ren akong nde nkkpagsulat here sa blog qoh.,

so ano b ngyari sken these past few months.,aun last January finally i got my college diploma.,thanks God sa tagal-tagal ng
panahon.,i also owe it to my former colleague Marvie.,cause he's the one who convinced me to go back to my school and finish my practicum.,so un then apply2x.,first for abroad.,but then i realized i need more experience pa.,so i applied for local jobs then..,and it was a rollercoaster ride.,i was happy kc ive never failed an exam (except sa lie detector lol.,management trainee for KFC) and interview and i always get hired nman but its either the task was too demanding or may problem sa hauz.,i was hired first as Accounting Assistant in one company kaso ugh sakit sa ulo.,so i quit.,that was February.,then ngmukmok me sa hauz for a month.,kc mejo na-depressed me cause i kinda doubted my abilities.,

But then again.,of course i need to have work.,so March 1.,i went to Summit One Tower here in Shaw Blvd.,super like qoh sana ung job n un kc my group training but then they told me stop daw ung hiring nila.,sad n nman me.,my iba p qong inapplyan na job and fortunately nkapasa nman.,but i chose ung Management Trainee position sa Mc Donald.,ok nman ung compensation.,mejo nghesitate lng me dun sa "bond" cause after like 5months.,may bond n xa.,na u have to stay sa company for 2yrs or else u have to pay them around P28,000...errrr mejo mhirap ata un kc although i know its part of being committed sa job.,im really not sure.,bka in d long run ill have a change of heart d ba.,but i tried pren mgtraining for 1 day..,kso kapagod teh! lol.,so aun quit ule.,mukmok ule s hauz.,

Good thing last saturday.,my nreceive me text galing dun sa company sa Summit One.,my exam and interview daw me on Monday..(aug.14,8:30am)...

Pic from : www.oatmeal.com (love this site)

will you ever forgive me for hurting you? and if so would you like me to explain why i did it in the first place?

2011-03-27T01:10:00.001+08:00

its all water under the bridge..before ive been meaning to ask u why but i guess what uve said on ur blog explains it all. and sometimes some questions are better left unanswered

ASK MAJHO HERE