Babylove Wisdom

TGIF Free Your Mind

2011-08-19T08:45:00.000-07:00

Happy Friday all! I figured while I'm in such good spirits these days I should go ahead and dabble in what I love doing: writing! Okay, maybe I didn't come up with some of these thoughts myself I felt they were interesting and thought provoking so enjoy! Leave a comment also if you'd like.

If happiness was the national currency what kind of work would make you rich?
Do you push the elevator button more than once, and do you really believe it makes the elevator move faster?
Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? (Look deep down with honesty.)
Would you rather lose all of your memories, or never be able to make new ones?
Has your greatest fear ever come true?
Do you remember that time five years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
If we learn from our mistakes why are we so afraid to make mistakes?
Would you break the law to save a loved one?
Which is worse: failing or never trying?
If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice what would it be?

Dignity or Dollars?

2011-08-11T09:34:00.000-07:00

Perhaps I need to vent to make it through the work week, I don't know. My newest thought though is when it comes down to dignity and employment which would one choose? Especially in this economy where even with a degree and stable work history it's like pulling teeth just to get an interview. I've never been one to truly want to be "in" with the popular crowd in school. I've always been somewhat of a rebel, so when it comes to compromising my feelings and playing my intelligence down it really bothers me. Maybe I am being judgmental when it comes to the things I see in my office, but I just can't bring myself to join. I think my biggest issue is that I feel I condone the actions that I know are inherently wrong and borderline illegal at times. I'm no self made millionaire, nor do I have an air tight plan on what I would do if I no longer had this job, but I wonder if it came down to me compromising or securing my employment which would I choose? Which would you?

What Women Shouldn't Do

2011-08-10T06:40:00.000-07:00

Mincing words, playing it safe, trying to be delicate is not what I can do on this subject. While recently watching a court show there was a woman suing a man for child support and defamation of character. He had implied that perhaps the child was not his. Yes, we have all heard this story time and again with it being a 50/50 chance that the child could or could not be. Well as the couple had taken a paternity test it was found that the child was NOT his. The child had been born in 2003 and assuming the show was current is now around 7. Not surprised huh? Me either as it could have gone either way, but what disgusted me was the woman's reaction. It was so nonchalant and her only retort was "I'm sorry". Really? Let's really look at this situation for what it really is nasty! At best it was her just being deceitful, but in the cases where women are unsure YUCK! The raw, uncut truth is a woman would have had to have unprotected sex allowing MEN to ejaculate in them in such a short period of time that they are unsure who fathered the child. To even think of that, not evening noting the unsafe practice, is just downright disgusting. As women we should have a little more respect for our bodies than that. Also the "men do it" excuse will not fly on this one. No, it may not be fair that men seem to be able to do anything when it comes to a lot of things and not be judged, but it is what it is. Besides, why size up your moral calls based on what someone else can or can't do? Sometimes I hang my head in shame for some things women allow themselves to be involved in. Let's hold ourselves in higher regard, and if we see a younger woman going through it show her the way by leading by example.

New Year Resolutions

2011-01-25T12:40:00.000-08:00

We are about a month into 2011 and I'm wondering if people have kept or even made resolutions. I vowed to make this year better and more productive than last year. Yes, I know it's a broad goal but a goal nonetheless and I knew it was attainable. What drives us to create these resolutions and better yet, what causes us to fail to maintain these resolves throughout the year?

Self - Worth

2010-07-06T21:22:00.000-07:00

Bottom line, stop sacrificing yourself to appease others. When it's true love it will never require you to lose your identity and become the person you love. Stop being angry for letting yourself bend over backward for someone else. People only do what we allow them to do. Take responsibility for your misery when it's all said and done. Yes it's easier to blame someone else when we are hurting but lies will not heal the heart, it only masks the problem which allows it to continue on with the next person. Do not become bitter with love or compromise or even sacrifice with the person who would be willing to do the same for you. Being bitter will make you miss out on that one special person who was meant for you all alone. KNOW your self- worth, because once you establish that initially, you probably would never jump through hoops for anyone ever again. Love yourself, spend time getting to know the real you and who you are and what you like. You'd be surprised to discover all the wonderful things about yourself you never knew, and you will never settle again for anyone undeserving.

Wisdom & Love

Cheadle vs. Foxx

2010-07-06T21:07:00.000-07:00

Don Cheadle and Jamie Foxx, both nominated for Best Performance by an actor in a leading role in 2004, for the movies "Hotel Rwanda" and "Ray", respectively. Don Cheadle playing the leading role in Hotel Rwanda depicting the horrific and graphic events taking place in Rwanda in 1994 as the world turned its head. Jamie Foxx played Ray Charles, in the movie portraying the late musicians interesting life. These two movies, while both based on true events, are two different genres so can barely be compared in that respect. So who should have one you ask? Or so Kenny asks. So what was the ultimate deciding factor in who was the best actor? Who would you have chosen? Personally I am partial to Don Cheadle as this movie was not only true but shed light on a subject that still is not widely shared with the world. Why didn't he win if this movie was so profound? The first thought that popped into my mind was Hollywood and its superficial values. In my opinion, and those of my peers frankly Jamie Foxx is "easier on the eyes". This is the bottom line, when it comes to Hollywood. Appearance means almost just as much as talent. This is not to discredit Jamie Foxx's talents in anyway as he is an excellent actor and did a wonderful job, however I believe those actors found less attractive have to work all the more harder. This being said I think Cheadle should have came out on top, but again Foxx won, which was not a bad choice, I just question the motives.

Wisdom & Love

Is Race Still An Issue

2010-03-18T10:13:00.000-07:00

What is the deal with black men dating white women vs. black women dating white men? You would think in this day and age and especially the younger generations would no longer see race as an issue in dating. Music is ever converging and blurring the color lines so why not the relationship scene just as fast? I have personally experienced the difficulty in finding my white counterparts who seem interested in dating outside their race. It doesn't seem so difficult for white women to find black males who are interested. Maybe I am wrong but this is how it seems as have some of my female friends have pointed out as well. I have asked a few of my male friends their thoughts on dating outside their race and they have stated its not an issue for them. So then what seems to be the problem? Well we tend to date those who we come in frequent and contact with so if we aren't in the environment with white males the likelihood of dating them becomes slim to none. Perhaps our common interests or careers don't usually place us in these types of environments. Then comes the rejection factor. Rejection is difficult for male or female so to go that extra mile to approach someone of a different race places the rate of rejection higher because people do view race as a factor. Perhaps not in a negative light but the outside is always seen before the personality is discovered. Its just human nature which can't be changed unless we all become blind. Perhaps black males come in more contact with white women than do black women with white males. I don't think its so much a matter of discrimination than is opportunity. So to all my females and males out there looking to date outside their race don't give up. Just build up the courage because what you think that person may not go for could be exactly what they want.

Wisdom & Love

Live Like We're Dying

2010-03-07T18:49:00.000-08:00

Ever since my dad passed and I've matured I have a different outlook on life. I see how people really carry such an importance on material things. I can't say that I do anymore. I'm not saying I don't have goals or aspirations, I mean otherwise I wouldn't even be writing. It's like that song by Kris Allen "Live Like We're Dying". Everyday and every decision you make truly counts. We always, always assume that we have time to correct things or change them or take that last trip. To tell someone you love them that you haven't spoken to in years, or someone you were even afraid to tell. That place you say you will visit one day, and that day never comes. Who is to say that the world won't end before we have done even one thing that is important to us. Do things today that you feel you can put off tomorrow. It doesn't even have to be anything big. Maybe its something you feel you should say...then just say it. People always say "tomorrow is never promised" but do they truly feel that in their hearts? I believe we should live like each day is our last because it very well could be. So do at least one thing you've always wanted but were too scared to do. Make a list of things you want to do and do them. I think in living this way you are TRULY living.

Wisdom & Love

Love: A Simple Explanation

2010-03-07T18:33:00.000-08:00

Many people ask what the meaning of love is. That is not a simple question to answer because there are many different types of love. I think though most people wonder about that "relationship" love. So where to begin. You have to know what it is to be loved and to love someone. Usually you are loved by parents or grandparents or whoever raised you. This love is the exact way people should love one another. The only difference is that relationship love is a bit deeper. This first love we are taught is unconditional and without intent behind any of its actions. This love is given without expectation that it should be returned. This love comes with sacrifice that we sometimes don't even see. Some parents will go without for the sake of giving to their child. This is true love. Never selfish and without need to be reciprocated. You give your all without concern of what you will receive from it. You love even when you are afraid your love will never be returned. You make decisions based on not just you but the one you are with. You listen with an open heart and soul to truly hear the other point of view. You make the compromise to do things you may not enjoy for the sake of another's happiness. Loving someone means you do what is best for the other person even if it means you set them free. True love is about how much you are willing to sacrifice for the happiness for another. I think the key to love is selflessness. If you can say that you would stick by a person's side when they are weak and frail and you see them dying day by day you know what it means to love.

Wisdom & Love

Dad: March 4th 1997

2010-03-07T18:26:00.000-08:00

What can I say about Herschal Brightful? He wasn't famous or an inventor but he was my dad. I can't say he was amazing to the world but he was to me. He was cool and laid back. Truly easy going and an all around great person. Like all of us on this earth he had his faults. But those are faults that were his and no one else's. What can I say? He was my dad and I wish when he was here he was around a lot more. I adored him with a love that I now feel overwhelmed with. Sometimes I feel like I am the only one who remembers at times. Since I'm the oldest of four daughters I can say I was blessed to have spent the most time with him, but cursed because its harder to let go. Missing him hurts in a deep way that seems to go on forever. I think of the times we will never share and the piece of my soul that he has taken hurts even harder. I will forever miss him and nothing will ever replace that part of my soul.

Wisdom & Love

Lines...Who Needs Them Anyway

2010-03-01T11:27:00.000-08:00

I hope I understand Mr. Gillis's suggestion on the topic of why male and females are corny and give wack lines. The age old confusion between the sexes: men vs. women. Why do men use lame lines to pull women? Why do women do the same? Well I can only speculate from a man's point of view since I am a female. Perhaps some men just aren't creative enough to come up with their own sayings to attract a female. Better yet, maybe these men fail to understand that most women don't even require elaborate schemes to be pulled in. Most of us are content with the straight forward, polite approach. Again maybe men think women are that mind boggling that this can't be true. Yes, it is! Believe it! For most of us, especially mature women, lines tell us that this man is scripted and any further communication may seem like a play that has been written. Women on the other hand respond to lines with lame excuses as well. I guess we feel why put in the effort of an elaborate let down when the approach was lame to begin with.

My theory also applies to women who try using lines as well. It's hard enough to work up the courage for male or female to approach anyone. Rejection is a huge ego blow so perhaps its nervousness that cause people to use lines. You always go for what you know when you can't think of anything else. And maybe some people feel like why be creative when there is a 50% chance of rejection.

So that being said I say keep it simple. Be polite and honest when approaching the opposite sex. I know I'm not impressed by lines and I'm sure I'm safe in saying that plenty of people feel the same. Keep it simple and have confidence.

Wisdom & Love

A Father's Unwavering Love

2010-02-24T15:33:00.000-08:00

To have an unwavering love for anyone can be difficult but never impossible. The bond between parent and child is unbreakable. A bond between mother and daughter is special. A father's unwavering love for his daughter is something out of this world. Maybe people don't realize that as a parent you are a model for your child of how a respectable adult should behave in the ever growing world around them. Men may also not understand the importance of their love for their daughters specifically. Perhaps men feel because their daughters are not sons they have little to show or give. This misconception couldn't be further from the truth. A father's love given unconditionally teaches their girls the very epitome of self worth and respect. The females are shown what love from a man should be always, which will in turn teach them never to settle for anything less from another male. Loving your daughter despite faults, mistakes and downfalls teaches the love of oneself. It's maybe never seen in this respect but it is an essential component to a life lesson learned. A father's unwavering love is also very special because men, in general, do not naturally have the talent to display this intense emotion of love. I commend all fathers who continually show love to their children. Unconditional, unwavering love is the foundation to a mentally sound stable life. Kudos to all the dad's out there! Continue to exude love for your children and especially your daughters. You may have no idea how one small action can change her life.

Thanks Mr. Kenneth Cooper

Wisdom & Love

Customer Service: So Sad

2010-02-18T12:55:00.001-08:00

I am sure that people have noticed the decline in customer service. The nonchalant attitudes of people in the customer service field is ridiculous. Yes, people do have 'bad days' but if everyday is a bad day then frankly you should quit. I believe it takes way more effort to be cruel than kind. I'm not even expecting for anyone to go out of their way but at least use routine manners learned in preschool. I don't want to see 'eye rolling' or hear hard breathing because I want to change my order or I have a question that you just don't feel like dealing with. Is that not your job? It's in the very description of your title. Servicing the customer, and no the customer is not always right. I have been on the other side of the fence and customers can be jerks at times. But those are few and far between especially when you keep the attitude positive from the start. Even the look on some one's face tells me if they want to be bothered or not. No, you don't have to smile 24/7 but don't look like I just kicked you in your back and now I'm asking to borrow money from you. This attitude of 'it's not my problem' is so off the marker. It IS exactly your problem if I'm the customer and you are servicing me. Maybe in this day and age of faceless services work ethics are no longer a priority. I even see this attitude in managers which trickles down to the employees which makes the overall experience for everyone uncomfortable. Maybe consumers have grown used to it and no longer have time to complain so we just deal with it. In turn the cycle continues because there is no repercussion for this terrible service that is being given. Maybe this is not your dream job, but that gives no reason to have such attitudes. In these economic times you should be happy enough to have a job and do all you can to keep it. Instead of complaining, because I know I'm not the only one, let's start complaining and turning these bad attitudes around. If I'm spending my money, which I hate to have to do anyway, I sure don't want sucky service while doing it.

Wisdom & Love

Beloved: Spoiler Alert!

2010-02-18T12:45:00.000-08:00

Um, yeah so I know this is WAY overdue but I just saw the movie Beloved. First of all WHY? I'm not really a symbolism type of person and I assume it had a lot of that in this movie. If that's not what it was then this movie was worse than I thought. Before I start I will say if you haven't seen the movie and would like to see it please don't read this. I pretty much sum up the movie and I wouldn't want to ruin it for anyone. So it opens up and I thought maybe I had started the DVD off in the middle of the movie. You know how some DVDs will start from where it was last stopped at? Yes, this is what I thought at first. Kids are screaming and a dog is being twirled around in the air by some invisible force. WHAT? I thought 'is this a horror movie'? I started to pick up the box and read the back but I said no I'll just wait and watch. So some kids run off and then years later Danny Glover shows up. Oh, believe me I skipped nothing, so if you're wondering what that opening was about so was I. At this point I'm like WHO are these people? I saw Oprah and some kids, then Danny shows up. Who is he supposed to be? Apparently he knows her, okay so he decides to stay. I still have no idea how he is related to Oprah's character and then he walks in and he sees the house glowing red. I am shaking my head because I am just so lost, but I am hoping my questions will be answered as the story goes on. I figure the house is haunted, still no indication from the movie, but I assume that is what is happening. Kimberly Elise is Oprah's daughter in this movie and she is apparently sick of living in a haunted house! Finally we're getting somewhere, she confirms it, but at this point I have like 100 other questions that haven't been answered. Meanwhile as I'm trying to put two and two together the movie is continuing to unfold which develops more and more questions. At this point I'm just watching to see what craziness happens next. So Danny moves in, they're all still dealing with the haunting until one day the ghost gets really angry and Danny, fed up, screams at it and its over. REALLY? That's all it took? Okay, so now start the flashbacks from the past, which are supposed to fill in the blank spaces but only makes things more confusing. Again, I can't very well turn it off now, I have to see what happens next in this three ring circus. Next thing you know Thandie Newton shows up, dressed all in black and sounding like someone who has smoked their voice box down to nothing. They take her in and are all living like a family. Thandie, who plays Beloved, apparently is mentally challenged. I think this is the only thing in this movie that I picked up on right away. I don't know if she had special powers but she convinces Danny's character to have sex with her. Again, WHAT? He does, feels guilty and leaves, leaving Oprah, Kimberly, and Thandie to live as a family. Oprah discovers that Thandie is her daughter she thought she had murdered as an infant. One more thing that I finally picked up on as well. So Oprah's character is happy, but then Thandie begins to spiral out of control, and finally you realize she is pregnant. Oprah is losing it, and Kimberly has to take up work to support the three of them. Sounding insane or like some parts are missing? Well yes, it's in sane and no there are no parts missing, trust me aside from the random flashbacks which will not help to explain anything else. So as Kimberly is trying to maintain working, a mob shows up at the house. I assume they have heard of the hardships of Oprah and Thandie and they are singing at the entrance to the house. Oprah and Thandie come out on the front porch, mind you Thandie is fully naked and pregnant the mob gasps. Oprah then, upon seeing a white man approaching to pick Kimberly up for work, believes he has come to take her and Thandie away. Oprah's character approaches with an ice pick and is held down. Thandie screams and then she disappears. Never to be seen again. At this point I am pretty much done with this movie. It can only go downhill from this point. The best part of this movie were the credits rolling at the end because it was over. I will say the acting was impeccable, and I assure you I am not being sarcastic. The story line however seemed like some one's terrible dreams all meshed into one story that took too long to end. I'm sorry, I love you Oprah but I can't hop on board with this movie.

Wisdom & Love

Something More Annoying Than Snow: Motor Vehicle Administration

2010-02-18T11:28:00.000-08:00

I am by far no expert on the structure of any motor vehicle department. I have never encountered any other motor vehicle administrations outside the State of Maryland but I am sure the stories are all the same. Let's just say Motor Vehicle Express is an oxymoron. Perhaps it seems when you do visit its always terrible because you don't really frequent this administration on a routine basis. It's hard to compare the level of service when you only visit maybe once or twice a year, so in their defense I'd say it's more of a hit or miss in the level of service. However that has never been my experience. The anxiety starts before you even hit the parking lot. Not only to find a space but you know the line will be wrapped around the building twice before they even open. Sure enough you see people in line, paperwork in one hand and a bagged lunch in the other. OH?! You forgot your lunch, too bad because you will be there for the better part of the day. We haven't even gotten to the customer service part. Again, I will say they have gotten a little better with the wait. That doesn't make up for the craptacular customer service. Clerks who act as if you spat in their soup the night before give you the least amount of information they can. Do they train them to do this just to see you stand in line for hours on end to have another question they didn't answer and you are re routed to eight different lines only to find out you are missing the blood sample required for a state issued ID. Then there is the discrepancy in information given by the clerks. Do they have totally different employee handbooks for each new employee because none of their information on procedures, or paperwork required, or what office does what ever matches. It's as if they are all working for different employers. I didn't know they were contracted workers who make up the rules as they go. Also why do you need so much proof of anything for the most simplest transactions. "I'm sorry ma'am I can't give you a copy of your driving record without the proper DNA sample". Wow really, okay! Is this administration run by the IRS? My hats off to those who work there who have been able to retain excellent customer service and actually KNOW what is going on. All in all thought I love having to go to motor vehicles because that is a sure fire excuse to have a whole day off from work.

Wisdom & Love

Nice Guys Finish Last

2010-02-04T16:10:00.000-08:00

First let me just say when I say guys I mean people but that phrase is more catchy. Hence me being nice for the sake of the public eye. So now that is out of the way lets get to it. For the sake of argument lets say when you die you go to heaven. So during one's years on earth you, assuming you're in the 'nice club' have been used, abused, stepped on and over all for different reasons by fellow humans. Maybe you believe in remaining faithful to humanity and therefore rendering you 'mean challenged' you think: "hey, I will receive my reward in the future or even afterlife". Guess what? The same 'meanies' here on earth will probably end up in a line at the gates and as on earth ahead of the nice crew. How unfair you ask, unless of course you aren't 'nice'. Believe me also when I say this, just because you are reading this does not make you nice. Not to the point that you are always last in what seems like everything life has to offer. So in my theory I see fussing and fighting in the afterlife and once again the nice guys are at the back of the line. Being patient and wondering at this point was it really all worth it? Maybe they should have been those miserable old ladies who own dozens of cats, keep the shades drawn, or those old men who just have no filter on their brains when it comes to speaking to people, or purposely tripping small children with their canes. And just as all seems lost, the nice guys notice that in all the fighting and bickering the mean folk have inadvertently stepped out of line and made way for those of us who have patiently waited all our life for our turns. We step up quickly, enter the gates as they gently close. Leaving behind all those who took us for granted wondering now what. Leaving us saying: JUSTICE!

Wisdom & Love

The Beginning

2010-02-03T17:02:00.000-08:00

Regarding anything new requires a 'start', so this is my start to my new life. I was about to say I hope but I don't hope I only do in regards to my writing. I won't bore you with my life's details or go on and on but I didn't want to leave my blog empty. I wanted to at least start out on some note, so here it is. What can you expect? Any and everything I encounter. I'm hoping to bring humor as well as education and any topics anyone would like to suggest is also welcome. I love having discussion and giving opinions on any subject. I feel I have a lot of wisdom to share and I love to hear wisdom from others. So join me on my journey, I welcome all who are interested and look forward to entertaining as well and educating.

Wisdom & Love