Barb's Daily Dose

Losing My Modesty

2009-11-06T03:49:00-08:00

Our Featured Guest Writer Today is DJ DeProspero

We're delighted that DJ DeProspero, a woman who's just completed chemo and radiation for Anal Cancer, felt comfortable sharing her experience with our readers. She's an inspiring person for so many reasons including her sense of adventure and her amazing kindness.

And Now For Her Story That She is Willing to Share

From the moment I was diagnosed with anal cancer my modesty, what little I had, came under attack. I realized very quickly that I’d be better off getting over it completely and learn to treat my “private parts” just like I might treat my arms or legs.

I was diagnosed with anal cancer as a result of a routine (age-triggered, I’m 56) screening colonoscopy. A tumor was found in my anus; it and two surrounding lymph nodes were biopsied and all were malignant. I had no symptoms, no expectations that this colonoscopy would be anything other than a somewhat bothersome test (the preparation really, not the test itself). Hearing that I had a tumor in my anus, that I probably had anal cancer was a bizarre experience. I had never heard of anal cancer. An early reaction, after the shock and terror passed, was “why couldn’t I just have breast cancer? How do I tell people have ANAL cancer?” When was the last time you said “anal” in public – or in private?

I realized I had to be straightforward and direct when telling people. Whenever I told anyone, from my family members and close friends to less close friends who had heard about it, I would say “I have cancer, anal cancer.” I would quickly continue telling them how it had been found and what the treatment was going to be so that I didn’t have to deal with their reactions or questions.

The treatment was six weeks of daily radiation with two weeks of chemo during those six weeks. The radiologist warned me that it was hard, “you’ll be severely sunburned inside and out over your whole groin area.” Each week I saw the radiologist on Wednesdays. He always wanted to take a look at the area being treated. The first time he said, “So drop your shorts.” I laughed, stood up, and lowered my pants. He looked at my vulva and then asked me to turn around so he could look at my anus and surrounding area. I appreciated his lack of formality in this exam. I didn’t have to undress, put on a gown, sit on the table and wait for the exam. He just needed to have a quick look, so “dropping my shorts” was fine with me.

Until the week I went in and learned he was on vacation. That was a different experience. This time a different male doctor came in, one I’d never seen or met before, and I was dreading his having to take a look. Luckily he didn’t. He didn’t seem as comfortable with me, nor did he make me feel relaxed. I was very relieved that I got out that day without the quick look. I didn't have to "drop my shorts."

Throughout the course of my treatment I was examined, almost always in this informal way, by three doctors (all male) and two nurses (female). On days when I was less comfortable I would remind myself that “it’s just more body parts – it could be an arm or a leg.”

Talking about what was happening was also a challenge. With friends I almost always jokingly referred to my “private parts.” I realized, after a nurse asked me “how are you doing ‘down there’?” that I wanted to use the correct anatomical names for the parts of my body that were being treated. Women tend to use “vagina” to refer to our whole crotch areas. Generally your listener knows exactly what you’re referring to (in those rare cases when you might actually be talking about that part of your body!) In my case I wanted to be specific since my issues were mostly with the external parts of my genitalia, specifically not my vagina. I looked on the web to review the names and made sure that I spoke of my vulva, labia and anus when I was speaking with the doctors or nurses. I was really bothered that not one nurse ever used those terms. I heard mostly “down there” and “bottom” as in “Here’s some cream for your bottom.”

Throughout my treatment I often thought of modest women I know, some of them very modest, and wondered how they would cope with this treatment. I’m sure the professionals would treat them differently than they treated me; I know I gave signs that modesty was not one of my concerns. But still, being modest would make this cancer even more awful, unnecessarily so. There are times when it’s good to think that your anus or your vulva are just like an arm or a leg.

DJ is recovering from her Anal Cancer and plans to continue reading, gardening, cooking and staying healthy. She's inspired me to schedule my colonoscopy.

The Hormone Guide

2009-11-05T03:09:00-08:00

Women Will Understand This!
Men Should Memorize It!

Every woman knows that there are days when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands! This is a handy guide that should be carried like a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS	SAFER	SAFEST	ULTRA SAFE
What's for dinner?	Can I help you with dinner?	Where would you like to go for dinner?	Here, have some wine.
Are you wearing that?	You sure look good in brown!	WOW! Look at you!	Here, have some wine
What are you so worked up about?	Could we be overreacting?	Here's my paycheck.	Here, have some wine.
Should you be eating that?	You know, there are a lot of apples left.	Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?	Here, have some wine.
What did you DO all day?	I hope you didn't over-do it today.	I've always loved you in that robe!	Here, have some wine.

Is the Glass Half Full?

2009-11-04T03:17:00-08:00

"Is the Glass Half Full"?

Depending on how your answer that question may predict whether you live a longer healthier life or run into some problems. In a study of 97,000 women aged 50-79, as part of the Woman's Health Initiative, women who were more optimistic, were 14% less likely to die in the next 8 years than their pessimistic counterparts. Is it that the optimists were more likely to exercise and eat well? Yes, but they also found that women who are cynical or even hostile, were much more likely to have health problems. Interesting? If you want to read more, here's the link:

So, smile, it may save your life. And, if you're feeling grumpy, and can't force a smile, then go out an exercise.

Health Risks from Drinking Soda, Especially for Women

2009-11-03T04:14:00-08:00

Our Featured Guest Writer Today is: Melanie Haiken, Senior Editor of Caring.com

At a picnic this weekend, I listened as an extended family member nagged at kids to stay away from the cola and other types of soda pop being served. "They rot your teeth," one grandmother admonished her grand kids. But she herself was drinking a big glass of Diet Pepsi, and didn't seem aware of the irony of her pronouncement: It's actually older women who are most at risk of health problems from drinking cola and other fizzy soft drinks.

Every six months or so, it seems, a new warning comes out about the dangers of drinking too much soda. And you may feel you've heard it all. But a couple of new studies have led experts to begin calling for a public health campaign to warn women about cola consumption.

Women are at greater risk of osteoporosis, or bone thinning, as they get older. Most of us already know that. But many people don't realize that drinking a lot of cola and other soft drinks increases osteoporosis risk -- or causes the disease to progress faster. The phosphoric acid that makes fizzy drinks fizz actually eats away at bone, making it more porous.

To Continue Reading This Article, click here.

H1N1 101: What You Need to Know

2009-11-02T03:04:00-08:00

What you need to know about H1N1 and the new vaccines to keep your family healthy from Nurse Barbara Dehn. Click here to view the video clip.

Giancarlo's Bracelet

2009-10-30T03:03:00-07:00

This is the bracelet that my 13 year old son made in his jewelry class. It's a beautiful hammered and twisted steel bracelet that I wear all the time. I especially love the way the clasp is integrated into the design.

I think he signed up for the class because a friend told him that it was a great way to meet girls, and in any case he was only one of 2 boys in the class, so in that regard, he considered it a big positive. What surprised him, was how much he loved the class. After this project they moved to bead work, and I don't mean stringing beads, but blowing their own glass beads. I'll post those photos next week.

I was a little surprised that he liked the class, but every day he came home with another wonderful treasure that he created, which made him feel so good. It was the same in wood shop last year, the sense of accomplishment that these middle school kids get is priceless. His wood shop teacher said that these types of classes help kids with eye hand coordination, with problem solving skills and learning how objects are made.

When I think about it, it was only about 75-100 years ago in our history that most people made most of the objects that they used every day, they didn't buy them ready made. People made their own clothes, blankets, window coverings, tables, chairs, and yes, even jewelry. Creating something with your hands just feels good.

Military Kids and Psychological Stress

2009-10-28T05:55:12-07:00

NBC news ran a story about how military kids are under tremendous amounts of stress. The wars in Iraq and Afghanistan have been dragging on for 8 years, and many fathers and mothers have had extended and repeated deployments to areas of danger. The worry that ensues and the nearly constant moving can wreak havoc on a child's life. Many times, when the parent comes home, they too have post-traumatic stress and that also can impact the children.

I'm a military kid. I moved every 3 years whether I wanted to or not. My dad was in Vietnam for a tour of duty and was often away for months at a time. Stress? Yes. Some of my friend's fathers were killed in action, some in plane crashes, others in mishaps. Small things that most people take for granted could be terrifying. Like the phone ringing. Is this the call we've all dreaded? Kids with parents in the military are also serving their country.

The psychological health of the parent that’s at home is key to the children’s health, and yet that parent is essentially a single parent who’s worried that something tragic will happen to their partner. It’s a recipe for disaster. The good news is that the more help and intervention that these kids receive, the better that they do.

What Parents Can Do

The Military Child Education Coalition, a nonprofit advocacy group, says deployment can be a difficult time, for both parents and the families they leave behind. It offers these tips for military families:

Stay in touch. Ask about homework, tests and school activities. This will help you feel connected to family life.
Share details about the deployment. Don’t think you’re doing your children a favor by sparing them the details — they want to know where Mommy or Daddy will be.
The remaining parent or caregiver must make care to take care of his or her own needs first. Make sure you’re connected to other people through groups on base, community groups, church groups or parent groups, so you will have your own support network.
If it can be determined, find a concrete way to illustrate how long the deployed parent will be away. One way is to create a paper chain, with each day represented by an individual link.
Leave remembrances. Photos, especially those of the family together, can be very powerful. Record yourself reading favorite bedtime stories or singing favorite songs. These will be treasured resources while you are away.

Here's a link to the story:

My Experience With Death Panels

2009-10-27T05:30:00-07:00

Yes, you read that correctly, I have experience working with the elderly helping them decide how they want to live in their remaining time, however long that is. Let me share with you a recent experience. One of my favorite patients was a lady who I'd been seeing every 3 months for the last 12 years. She had 8 children, all grown and very close to their mom. She was a grandmother to dozens, and great grandmother to several. She led an active life, traveling on a budget, creating hand made quilts and singing in her church. She had a number of health problems and was receiving regular treatments for cancer.

One day, during one of our regular visits, she seemed unusually quiet, and when I asked a few open ended questions, it all came spilling out. You see, even though she was close to her kids, and they knew she had cancer, no one wanted to talk about her impending death. Not even her grown child who lived next door and who helped care for her. She was worried, because she was starting to feel the weight of her illness and her energy was declining. She said that she felt overwhelmed by the number of details of things she needed her kids to know about, but didn't know where to start.

Well, it just so happens that she was my last patient before lunch, so I invited her to get dressed and come talk to me in my office. After about 45 minutes, she had a "To Do List" and we had done some internet research and phone sleuthing to find the information she needed about where her parents were buried, when the seminar on "Music selection for your Memorial" would next be held. I asked questions and she provided answers. She had her homework, because for some questions, she needed more time to think, for others, we brainstormed how to bring up the topic with her kids and she thought about which of her kids would be most likely to listen to and follow her wishes.

Over the next few months, she completed an advanced directive, talked to her oncologist and a long list of other tasks, including writing letters to her kids and deciding which family treasures were to go where. Never once did I prescribe medication to her. Never once did I encourage her to continue or to stop her treatment. I was just the person who listened to what she wanted and helped her communicate her
wishes to her family. She came in to the office beaming on her next visit. She said, that she felt more at peace because she felt less overwhelmed and that she was more in charge.

Sometimes, it just takes someone in a white coat to ask the questions and provide options or resources that they may not have considered. It also takes someone who's not afraid to talk about death. Often the
family is so emotionally wrecked that it's an unfair burden for them to be able to talk about their loved one's impending death. Who else will help a person preserve their dignity when they are coming to the end of their life?

Vitamin D

2009-10-26T04:30:00-07:00

Sit in on this Medical School Lecture on Vitamin D.

It's entertaining and informative. Thanks to Dr. Michale Holick from Boston University.

The Menopause Pot Belly

2009-10-23T03:39:00-07:00

The Menopause Pot Belly, or Meno Pot Belly as I call it. I've got it, many of my friends have it, and a few are successfully avoiding it. For years we thought that this was related to small increases in women's insulin resistance as we age, meaning that we can't metabolize carbohydrates as well and are prone to diabetes.

Data published in the journal Obesity may have found a different explanation. Data from the Study of Women's Health Across the Nation (SWAN), which is a longitudinal, community-based study found that testosterone is more likely to be the cause in increased abdominal fat that women have around the time of menopause. The same research team also found that metabolic syndrome, which is linked to abdominal fat and risk of diabetes and heart disease was also related to testosterone levels.

"For many years, it was thought that estrogen protected premenopausal women against cardiovascular disease and that the increased cardiovascular risk after menopause was related only to the loss of
estrogen's protective effect," said Imke Janssen, one of the study's authors. "But our studies suggest that in women, it is the change in the hormonal balance--specifically, the increase in active testosterone--that is predominantly responsible for visceral fat, and for the increased risk of cardiovascular disease."

Hmmm, something to think about while I try tie up the laces of my shoes before heading off to the Zumba class to try to decrease the size of the Meno Pot.