BBC Surrey Breakfast Blog

The Queen visits Surrey

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 10:07:00 +0000

Her Majesty The Queen is visiting Guildford Cathedral this morning, then she's off to Redhill this afternoon to officially open East Surrey College's new campus.

So this morning I asked for our listeners' brushes with royalty. I set up an arbitrary exclusion zone - I only wanted stories from people who had been within five yards of the royal family. Bonus points would be given for hand-shaking and actual conversation.

In the words of Marti DiBergi from Spinal Tap - I got that; but I got more... a lot more...

Richard from Bramley:
My mum during the war was in the army and a driver - she came round the corner and there was a car stopped - and a woman trying to change her tyre. It was the Queen (Princess Elizabeth at the time). She helped her change it!

Antonia from Farnborough told us on air about making the Queen Mother a Tia Maria coffee.

Robert from Farnborough told us a brilliant story on air about how at the age of 10 in 1944 he was playing with a friend in the grounds of Albury Park near Guildford, then owned by the Duke of Northumberland. They were playing near some azaelia bushes quite a way into the park when they rounded a bush to be confronted by a party of seven or so people. Everything stopped, and then one of the group, The Queen (later Queen Mother), stepped forward to shout:

"What on earth are you doing here? Get out!"

which they very promptly did.

Angela of Arford sends this email (which I have edited a bit):

"Dear Nick

It was 1965, I was 17 years old and a flower power child. I was working for Surrey County Council conducting a traffic survey about a possible by-pass around Haslemere.

Without realising, the policeman I was working with flagged down the Duke of Edinburgh and directed his car into a layby. He was driving with Uffa Fox, the sailing chappy, in his open Alvis.

After explaining the reason for flagging him down, our conversation went as follows:
Where are you going? “Cowdray Park”

Where have you come from? “Windsor”

What is the purpose of your journey? “Polo”

Although he looked familiar, I had no idea who he was - the policeman had to fill me in. I was still standing on the same patch of road 6 to 8 hours later and the Duke came driving back in the other direction - he tooted to me!!"

Hana from Guildford was held by Princess Diana as a baby.

Anonymous texts: Thirty years ago my son and daughter were spoken to by the Queen and Duke of Edinburgh when she opened the Sussex Police Training Headquarters in Lewes. I was so overwhelmed I forgot to take a photo.

Ray from New Haw was working for St John Ambulance at a Buckingham Palace Garden Party and went to grab a bite to eat from the Royal Kitchens. On his way out of the building he met the Duke of Edinburgh, who was lost, and had to give him directions back to the garden party. The Duke explained he didn't come down to this part of the building much.

And finally Shirley from Guildford spoke to us on air at 8.42 this morning - this was the text that set it off:

I was lucky to be Commanded to the Palace to 2004 for the first Christmas party The Queen held for the public. I was nominated by the Surrey Advertiser for my charity work. She spoke to me for three minutes - most of the conversation was about who was my hairdresser and she told me who her hairdresser was.

We fleshed out Shirley's story on air and it became a lovely moment - if you want to hear it you have six days from the date of this blog post before it disappears. Click here and scroll forward 2hrs 42m.

I would also recommend having a listen to Robert from Farnborough's story, click on the same link and scroll forward 1hr 47m.

Actually the whole show is a bit of a royal fest from 7am, so if you like that sort of thing - start 1hr in. If you want to know what part my daughter is playing in the school nativity play, start from the beginning.

Thanks to everyone who contributed to the show and I'm sorry if I didn't get a chance to mention your royal experience in this blog post.

God Save The Queen!

Recording Amy and Abi's diary

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 10:40:00 +0000

Amy and Abi's diary is a 90 second audio diary recorded by my daughters (who are six and three years old) every week on BBC Surrey.

Now I have the Saturday breakfast show as well as the weekday slot, we play it first at 8.50am on Saturday and then again at 8.50am each Monday morning.

A lot of people like it - I wrote a post on my own blog about how it came to be a few months ago, but I didn't explain the mechanics.

Betty from Boxhill called during the show this morning, asking how it was my girls appeared to be so articulate. Now Betty, they are very articulate, but we also use a lot of production tricks. This post is about how it is all put together.

Preparation

Every Friday afternoon I will ask the girls to start thinking about the diary. I ask Amy to think about three things that she has done during the week she might like to talk about. She will often discuss them with her mum to make sure she hasn't forgotten anything. I ask Abi to think about one thing.

Abi, being three, doesn't have a great memory for the chronological specifics of recent events, so we will often talk about something she has done that Friday.

I will try to record Abi as early as possible on Friday afternoon. The later it gets, the more likely she is to act up. Abi is someone who sees the fun in everything, so if she thinks she can muck about she will.

Amy is much more conscientious and really takes the diary very seriously. She is something of an archivist - since she learned how to write she has kept diaries and scrap books and often draws pictures of significant events in her life, which are a joy to scan and keep on the computer.

Recording

We have to record the girls separately in a quiet room at home. They will beg and plead to watch each others' recording and promise to be quiet, and then within 30s they will lose interest and start mucking about. So Mrs Wallis will distract Abi (who is prone to start banging on the door to interrupt proceedings anyway) whilst I am recording Amy, and give Amy a task whilst I am recording Abi, just in case she is tempted to burst in.

Both girls now know what we call the "furniture" of the piece - the stock phrases "Hello my name is Amy/Abi, I'm x years old and this is my diary. On xxxx [day]..." We always finish with something like "Thank you for listening to Amy/Abi's diary, bye-bye"

and then in between I try to give them as much freedom as possible to describe what they've been doing and with whom. If either of them swallow a word or phrase, or fluff what they're saying, I'll stop them and ask them to say it again. If what they're saying is unclear, I might suggest a better way of saying it, which they will repeat back to me.

The best moments are when we have (in my mind) got enough "set up" material recorded about the event Amy or Abi is describing (where it is, who was involved, what they were meant to be doing), and I can say "Tell me a bit more about it..." or "What was the best bit?" or just let them wander off into their own recollections, because that's when you get the unique perspective. I don't tend to stop them when this is happening, no matter how long they go on for, as it can all be edited out afterwards.

I have a mental checklist I go through as we are recording - have we successfully negotiated the furniture? Have we coherently gone from one sentence to another? (I sometimes find myself wracking my brains thinking "Did she say 'and' or 'but' at the start of that sentence?" - and whether or not that will mean a re-record) Where are the in and out points? Are there enough of the girls' thoughts and personalities in there, or is it all functional, like a list? etc etc

Then comes the boring bit.

Editing

Usually after the girls have gone to bed on Friday night, I will sit down and cut the audio together. The aim is to get what is usually around 7 minutes of recorded audio down to 90 seconds.

This usually takes around an hour. It's a good rule of thumb with pre-recorded television news that every minutes you see on screen will take an hour to shoot and an hour to edit. With radio, you can usually assume one minute of audio can take an hour to record and edit.

The "raw" version of Amy and Abi's diary is full of ums, errs, long pauses, mistakes, non-sequiturs and my voice steering them back on topic. Chopping all those out into a piece of coherent radio is something of an art, and one I have got reasonably good at over the years.

I edit the audio it on free software which I downloaded to my PC, export it as an mp3 file and then email (usually with a short, written cue) it to my producer, who will load it onto the BBC Surrey playout system, ready for your listening pleasure.

If you would like to hear an example - please do tune in, or click here.

BBC Surrey story in Private Eye magazine

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 08:29:00 +0000

Do you remember the Post Office story? I have been trying to interest a number of national publications/editors in it since we broadcast Seema Misra's situation on BBC Surrey and BBC South's Inside Out programme on 7 February this year.

I have been working with a journalist at Private Eye magazine over the past few weeks, and a piece on the Post Office Horizon system leads the investigative section "In the Back" in this fortnight's issue (No 1298 p.28).

If you have a chance please buy this fortnight's Private Eye, it's an excellent read, and the Post Office story deserves wider public attention.

The Greatest Wedding Floor Fillers Album in the World Ever

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 08:33:00 +0000

It's a crowded market, but a spontaneous decision to create this hypothetical album on Tuesday's show led to the following nominations:

Let's Twist Again by Chubby Checker from Dennis

Dancing in the Dark by Bruce Springsteen - Anon

Come on Eileen by Dexy's Midnight Runners - Sam in Frimley Green

Wake Me Up Before You Go Go by Wham - Anon

YMCA by Village People - The Bear Pub in Esher, Mark in Woking

Angels - Robbie Williams - The Bear Pub, Esher ("for the first dance")

Saturday Night by Whigfield - The Bear Pub, Esher and Ineke Clewer

Macarena by Los del Rio - The Bear Pub, Esher and Ineke Clewer

Nutbush City Limits by Ike and Tina Turner - Alex ("a surefire guarantee!")

I'm in the Mood for Dancing by The Nolans - Mike in Dorking

Dancing Queen by Abba - Teresa in Woking and Martin Drapper

Hi-Ho Silver Lining by Jeff Beck - BBC Surrey Breakfast Team

Daydream Believer by The Monkees - BBC Surrey Breakfast Team

Superstition- by Stevie Wonder - BBC Surrey Breakfast Team

Somebody Else's Guy by Jocelyn Brown - Danny Pike (former wedding DJ - "get the girlies on the dancefllor, cos guys are never going to start it off!")

Any more for any more?

Mark Lewis interview

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Wed, 03 Aug 2011 20:40:00 +0000

This is Mark Lewis, the solicitor who has specialised in trying to find out how much phone hacking was going on at the News of the World.

He first met Bob and Sally Dowler during the trial of Levi Bellfield in June this year.

Levi Bellfield murdered Bob and Sally's 13 year old daughter Milly.

The reason the Dowlers went to see Mr Lewis, was because they'd been told by the family liaison officer at Surrey Police that there was good reason to believe Milly's phone had been hacked in the hours after she was reported missing, by journalists from the News of the World. Furthermore it seems some of the messages left for Milly were deleted by the journalists, giving Bob and Sally hope their daughter was alive.

It now transpires that Surrey Police may have been aware that News of the World journalists had hacked Milly's phone. If they did know it, they neglected to tell the Dowlers.

I went up to London last week to speak to Mr Lewis. He has some very interesting things to say about the phone hacking scandal, meeting Rupert Murdoch, and the actions of Surrey Police.

You can hear the interview tomorrow - Thursday 4th August (a month to the day since the scandal broke), on BBC Surrey Breakfast between 6am and 9am.

Further links to online versions of the interview will be posted shortly afterwards.

BBC Surrey on a radio taken from a Lancaster bomber

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 04:43:00 +0000

Who needs one of those new-fangled DAB radios? Or indeed one of those fancy-pants FM sets?

BBC Surrey is available, loud and proud, on 1368 AM (the transmitter is apparently in Duxhurst). I didn't know this until alerted to our mastery of the medium wave by Brian Haynes from Crawley.

Brian listens to us every morning on the above radio set, which is originally from a Lancaster bomber.

This makes me very happy.

Worth a listen

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 19:04:00 +0000

Forgive me for blowing the BBC Surrey Breakfast trumpet (yes, we do have one) for a moment, but I think the BBC Surrey breakfast programme is sounding pretty special at the moment.

In fact (and yes, I know I'm biased), I think the whole station is sounding rather impressive right now.

I know that you will be the judge of that, thank you very much, but if you haven't listened regularly for a while, or if there are parts of the schedule that remain unfamiliar to you, this is the moment to explore. You won't be disappointed.

To be honest, I think we've been sounding pretty good for a long time, but sometimes you need a catalyst. For us, I think it's been our slight jiggling of the schedules to shift the breakfast show back to 6am, which happened on Monday.

I now broadcast 6am to 9am, the Danny Pike Show kicks in at 9am and the ground is made up by Allison Ferns, whose show is extended by an hour from noon to 4pm. Sarah Gorrell remains unchanged, going from 4pm to 7pm.

Essentially, boys in the morning, girls in the afternoon.

For some reason this schedule changed has clicked in a very seamless way. It feels great to be on air at 6am, and the teams on Danny's show and mine have been working together to make sure there is a lot of cross-fertilisation of editorial and creative ideas, so the changeover at 9am flows nicely.

If you have a moment, have a listen to today's show. I loved every single moment of it. If that has already disappeared (they only stay up for seven days) by the time you read this, use the above link to listen to whatever the latest show is, and let me know what you think!

Would you like to work in radio?

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 10:29:00 +0000

Hello. Sorry I haven't written for a while.

That's my office in the picture, by the way - studio 1a at BBC Surrey in Guildford.

I bumped into a lovely fella the other day, looking for a job in radio. I've blogged about it on my personal blog, but it might be of interest to someone reading this.

I'd also like to draw your attention to a website my wife helped set up called Route into Radio.

It's got advice from my dear BBC Surrey colleagues Danny Pike and John Reynolds, plus many other luminaries.

The interviewees are divided into categories, so as well as presenting, you've got journalism, interactive, technical, sales and marking, management and production.

Then you've got the stuff they are talking about also divided into categories - getting started, moving up the ladder, and day-to-day advice. The idea being you can cross-reference them against the job categories.

Have a look, and tell me what you think. My wife wasn't responsible for the bits you don't like!

Yours

Nick

Why are so many people not getting their mail in Woking?

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 08:12:00 +0000

Lots of people in Woking say they are experiencing unacceptable delays to their post.

Whilst discussing this on the programme I received the following email. The author would like to remain anonymous to protect her husband.

"My husband is a postman in Woking. The problem has arisen because Woking has now followed Guildford's lead and reorganised the way the post is delivered. The rounds have all changed with all postmen having new rounds. Rather than delivering on bikes, two rounds are combined and delivered by two postmen using a van. On the surface this would appear to be quite a sensible, efficient idea however my husband's experience is that it is impossible to deliver the two (longer) rounds on one day even when they stay late to get as much as they can done; in fact my husband and his partner are only able to complete just over one of their two rounds. As a result their solution is to deliver their rounds on alternate days so that their customers do at least get their post every other day. The postmen are very unhappy with the situation but their is little they can do unless their managers accept that there is a problem and do something about it."

Obviously we can't verify that this is the case on the basis of one email, but we have asked Royal Mail to come back onto BBC Surrey Breakfast to hear what they have to say. I'll keep you posted. Posted. See what I did there?

James Duffus Wallis

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Sat, 11 Jun 2011 20:40:00 +0000

Born 7.25pm, Thu 26 May 2011. 8lb 6oz. In this picture he is 10 days old. He is 2 weeks 2 days old today, and looks much the same.

Every week, James's sisters, Amy (6) and Abi (3), record a diary for my show - here is a special edition welcoming their new baby brother into the world.

Amy and Abi's Diary: James by nickwallis

Thank you so much to everyone who has been so kind in passing on their congratulations. It has been an exciting time. We didn't know what sex our baby was going to be before he was born, so coming to terms with having a son, and how that may extend my parenting skills has been a moving, but daunting process.

Duffus is a family name (and a sept of the Sutherland clan). My Grandma and Great Aunt (or 'Grand' Aunt, as she would have it "If she's a Grandmother, I'm a Grand Aunt") were Duffus, both proud Scots.

I am happy for James to be known as Jay, Jamie, Jim-Bob, Jim, Jimmy or JD, but I am secretly hoping he won't mind being called Duff - a very cool nickname, as fans of Guns n' Roses will know.

It is also the name of the beer in The Simpsons and a byword for something that is not very good. I'm sure James will have the strength of personality to reclaim its unspectacularly heroic characteristics.

In terms of a career path, I have decided James's job is to change the world or save it. More realistically, so long as he moves out before he's thirty, I'll be happy.

In the meantime, James has been feeding well, he's recovered his birth weight and looks like he might be a sleeper.

Now that's what I call a Royal Wedding window display

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Tue, 26 Apr 2011 08:07:00 +0000

It is good to see that improvisational genius is alive and well in St. John's in Woking. This window display, in which Prince William is represented by a crystal candelabra and Kate by a cuddly polar bear is by far the best thing I have seen related to the Royal Wedding.

MBEs all round to the proprietors of the Ring-a-Roses florist in St. John's, and to Nigel Searle who took the photo and the trouble to send it in. God Save The Queen!

My Comic Relief performance

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 21:23:00 +0000

Has just gone up online. Watch it here, and find out who the gentleman standing next to me in the above photo is too!

Comic Relief Routine

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Fri, 18 Mar 2011 06:43:00 +0000

I did a 10 minute comedy gig at the Komedia in Brighton last night (for a post on how this all came about, start here). Also playing the same venue on the same night (in a different room, obviously) was Tim Burgess off of the Charlatans (below)!

So I was able to saunter up to him and say "oh yeah, hi Tim, yeah, I'm playing here tonight too, man" before gibbering like an idiot about how much I love him and could I have a photo. He graciously agreed.

A video of my performance will be posted online as soon as I can get hold of it. In the meantime, here is the script I worked from, although the final version was a little, er, looser and swearier.

Before I post it, please could I beg you to text the word "Surrey" to 70011 after you have read it (before 25 March 2011). £1 will be added to your phone bill and that £1 will go straight to Comic Relief. Click here for full Terms and Conditions.

Okay here's the script. Hope it raises a chuckle:

Hello Brighton. You owe me £60.
I came down here 4 summers ago to see some friends, and was trying to drive home on a Saturday morning, the same day as the Brighton Pride march. All the roads in the town centre were closed, so I drove off east along the coast road and got done for doing 36 miles an hour, on a dual carriageway. 36 miles an hour, on a dual carriageway. They say it is a built up area. It's not. On one side you have some hotels set a considerable way back from the road, and on the other side of the road, you have The English Channel.

It's not built up, it's the end of the country - there is no one on one side of the road for 25 meters, there's no one on the other side of the road for 25 miles. £60. And three points. Love this city.
Gay Pride. Do you know when it all began? Back on the 28th June 1969. Do you think the brave individuals who first made a stand against the bigoted brutality of the New York City Police would have known their actions would spark the Stonewall Riots, leading to Pride marches the following year in cities across America that eventually forced the repeal of all sorts of oppressive laws, the spread of Pride Marches across the world, the mainstream acceptance of gay culture, city centre road closures and a speeding ticket for muggins here? Perhaps they should have done! £60!
Maybe I was just driving too fast.
So it's St Patrick's day, patron saint of vomit. Who here is celebrating St Patrick's Day? Who here is actually Irish?
Really, what's Your name? Tell me something you know about St Patrick....
He was a Brit. Quite religious. Lived around fourth or fifth century. Big fan of foam hats with Guinness written across the front.
Does anyone think it's strange that on St Patrick's Day we're being asked to celebrate another nation's identity through the medium of alcohol.
Not all national holidays are about drinking. Easter, the most important festival in the Christian calendar, is about DIY.
Statistically more shelves get put up over Easter weekend than any other time of year. I'm sure Jesus, as a former carpenter, would have appreciated the irony.
So how many people have got a bit of Irish in them? Or are looking for some by the end of the evening?
My great grandfather was a proud Irishman, and a colonel in the British army. This is true. The problem is he was a proud Irishman and colonel in British Army in about 1920. When the British army were busy suppressing the Irish rebellion.
It's all right, though. He was in the Pay Corps. He didn't actually kill any of his own countrymen. He just made sure those who were doing so got paid.
My father was in the Signals, he went to the Falklands. In 1990, when things had quietened down a bit.
And my brother has done two tours of Afghanistan in the Royal Logistics Corps, the supply chain people. Backbone of the Army, they call themselves. Known to other Regiments as 'the blanket-stackers'. [mimes folding blankets]
So you may not be surprised to know I flirted with joining the Army, but that was my first mistake. The Army isn't really the sort of organisation which wants you to flirt with it. My advice to anyone wanting to join the army is NOT to flirt. They prefer you to be more... murderously keen.

I make too many mistakes to be in the army.
A mistake in the army could be leading your men into a minefield, which up until that point you were pretty sure was just a field.

A mistake in local radio is, say, mispronouncing the leader of Tandridge District Council's surname live on air:

“I'm so sorry that was Mr Brian Buh-gina, leader of Tandridge District Council”

And in radio we have a further safety net - the timecheck and record.

So... “Once again, my very sincere apologies to Mrs Clithoris, it's 12 minutes past 7, here's Phil Collins.”

I know a situation has to be pretty excruciating if it needs Phil Collins to rescue it, but believe me he has, many times.

I do the breakfast show at my station, and perhaps one of the things I should have realised about doing the breakfast show is that in order to be at work when you are eating your breakfast, I have to eat my breakfast at four o'clock in the morning. This is not a good time for breakfast. If it were, more of us would be doing it.

They say the early morning is a good time to think. It is. It's a good time to think about how much you'd like to be back in bed. But being up early does give you the opportunity be on your own for long periods of time in the dark, time to dwell on your grievances, nurture your psychoses, stockpile weapons and plan for your inevitable on-air breakdown. And subsequent alcohol-fuelled killing spree. Oh yes...

The time's just coming up to 7:37. Here's Carly Simon.

But doing the breakfast show means my afternoons are my own I do get to see a lot of my kids. I pick my five year old up from school most days. Other days I just let her find her own way home. She makes it nearly every time.

Three days a week, I'm the only dad waiting in the playground surrounded by hundreds of pregnant, lactating or toddler-wrangling, incredibly organised women, all of whom think I'm unemployed.

At first it was tough, but I've realised I'd rather they thought I was unemployed than have them find out I'm a radio presenter they've never heard of.
I've been telling my listeners about tonight and trying to get them involved. I asked them to send their favourite jokes to me and for every one I read out on stage, I would donate a pound to Comic Relief. [takes tenner out of pocket] I have ten jokes and here is a tenner for that purpose.

But sadly we've run out of time. [puts note back in pocket - responds to imaginary side stage comment].

Oh a couple more minutes. Really. Right [takes out tenner again].
Now these jokes are my listeners favourite jokes, so you may have heard them before. So let's deal with this in a grown up way.

If you know the punchline to the joke I am reading, don't keep it to yourself. If you know the punchline to that joke and can shout it out before I get to it, I will double my donation to Comic Relief for that joke to TWO whole pounds.

Okay? Understood? It has to be the right punchline for the joke I am reading, though. Not just any punchline. Not just bleeeurgh! The right punchline.

Okay, let's go....

LISTENER JOKES:

This is Angela of Arford's effort.
Two cats were having a swimming race across the Channel. One was an English cat called "1-2-3" and the other was a French cat called "Un-deux-trois".

Which cat won? 1-2-3 won, as Un-deux-trois-quatre-cinque (un der trois cat sank) !!

Christine in Reigate

I saw Tim the RAC driver in his van just now looking very upset... he's heading for a breakdown.

Two from Reed in Cranleigh.

Joke 1: I tried water polo but my horse drowned.

Joke 2: I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.... I can hardly contain myself.

Alexis in Horsham writes:

Did you hear about the fat, alcoholic transvestite? All he wanted to do was eat, drink and be Mary.

One from Eric in Aldershot:

The vet anaethetised my pet lizard. It's a calmer chameleon.

MICK IN REDHILL sent in two - WHAT DO YOU CALL A GIRL WITH A SauSAGE ON HER BACK? - BARBIE

WHAT DO YOU CALL A PARROTT UNDER AN UMBRELLA DURING A RAIN STORM - POLLY UNSATURATED

Patrick in Farnham:

I was walking through the jungle one day. When i came across this Pygmy standing on top of a dead elephant.

I said "what happened here then?" the pygmy replied "I killed it with my club"

I said "That must have been a big club." The pygmy replied "About 140 of us."

This one is from the Chief Superintendent Gavin Stephens of Surrey Police.
I saw a French footballer playing on a Nintendo earlier. It was Thierry on Wii.

And this is my favourite, from Margaret in Guildford:

A penguin walks into a bar and says to the barman 'has my brother been in today?'

The barman says 'I don't think so, what does he look like?'.
I'm Nick Wallis - thank you and have a good evening.

Misapprehensions We Have Laboured Under

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Thu, 03 Mar 2011 10:35:00 +0000

After admitting yesterday I thought for years that Ski Sunday and Horse of The Year had the same TV theme tune (they don't, as this Telegraph article makes clear), this morning we decided to ask what Misapprehensions You Have Laboured Under.

A great response. Some old classics and some genuinely weird ones:

An email from Dave in Frimley: "A traditional leg-pull was to send gullible young employees to the works stores for a "long stand". The storeman would then ask them to go and wait in the corridor."

Judi in Dorking texts: When we were small children our dad used to tell us that they had 'treacle mines' at Coldharbour near Dorking! We still refer to this with the grandchildren - he managed to lead them into believing it for a while every time we went there on the way to Leith Hill!

Darren Williams on Twitter writes: I used to think Twiki (the robot) from Buck Rogers was played by Twiggy. I didn't actually know who Twiggy was at the time.

Maureen from Reigate writes: When I was 12, my friend's older brother sent me to our local corner shop for some elbow grease. Lile the helpful girl I was, I went. Also my best friends mum told us we must never let an earwig get in our ear as it would eat your brain. I still can't bear these little things with the big pincers.

Patrick in Farnham found out in later years that the lyrics to Paranoid by Black Sabbath were "finished with my woman cos she couldnt help me with my mind" and not "finished with my woman cos she couldnt help me with my bike".

Peter in Reigate for years, I thought the group The Thompson Twins had only two members!

When she was a child Janine in Seale knew the Puma was a big cat. She also knew the Jaguar was a big cat and a car. The Peugeot is also a car with a big cat as its logo. But only when Janine reached adulthood did it become apparent there was no such thing as a big cat Peugeot. "My world shattered." she adds.

Anna in Addlestone says "mine was that Pamela Anderson and Jennifer Aniston were sisters. Still not sure?" Well, now you mention it....

Julia writes: One of my best friends is from Ireland originally and her family name is "Ryan". I once asked her dad why he travelled so much and he said "because I own Ryan Air". I was most upset when I realised about eight years later he'd been pulling my leg... and was in fact a professor of music.

Franzi in Tunbridge Wells believed (as to be honest, I probably did) that Malibu was a country in its own right - an island paradise somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. It's not, it's a suburb of Los Angeles County.

And finally one more from me - I thought for years that Candi Staton of Young Hearts Run Free fame was called Candy Station - in the manner of odd names that mean something like Robin Banks. Though what a Candy Station might actually be, I have no idea....

Read the small print

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Sun, 27 Feb 2011 20:54:00 +0000

This photo was taken of me late on Friday night at the ex-serviceman's club in Reigate. I was still smiling three hours after having done my first stand-up routine.

It was taken by Ian Tuttle, an official Comic Relief photographer who came down and took some photos of me with my comedy tutor (and spirit guide) Nathaniel Tapley. We put on some Comic Relief t-shirts and mucked around with red noses and microphones. The photos are owned by Comic Relief and so I can't put them up here until they've been published.

This one was taken by my friend Angus Edy.

There is also a full (handheld, low-res) video of my entire performance which may make its way here in a few weeks.

I am going to write a post on Monday about the whole experience and list some of the wonderful people who made Friday so brilliant. As well as paying a tenner to get in, some very generous people in the audience also handed over a total £181.08 in cash for Comic Relief after my performance (maybe as a bribe to make me never do it again). It was all rather humbling.

If you want to donate a pound, text "Surrey" to 70011 and it's added to your phone bill. It's that easy. Full T+C's here.

Only 18 days to go now until the big one at the Komedia on Thursday 17 March. Now I'm getting nervous all over again!

Nick Wallis - "Please be gentle with him"

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Sat, 19 Feb 2011 08:42:00 +0000

COMEDY COTTAGE - with RONNIE GOLDEN ( RED HEART DAY)

25 February 2011
8pm - 11pm
Location: The Ex Serviceman and Social Club
1 Chartfield Road
Reigate, United Kingdom
Tickets £10 (profits to British Heart Foundation) for tickets call: 01737 242009

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

More info: February is Heart Awareness month - Friday 25th Feb is officially Red Heart day - so why not join in the fun don something red, be it lipstick, tie or er sunburn...come along to what promises to be another great night at our Award winning - Comedy Cottage.
Fabulous line-up!
Headlined by Cottage Fave

RONNIE GOLDEN
"...brims with artistic versatility, flitting effortlessly from musical impersonation to hilarious one-liners, from personally-penned songs to the gob-smackingly bizarre". (Totnes Times)
"a lively multi-instrumentalist with an impressive vocal range" Chortle
SUPPORT FROM -
NEIL COLE
Actor, writer, Award winning comedian Neil Cole supported Russell Brand on his recent UK tour. Neil has hosted music events at the Royal Albert Hall. He is also the presenter of World Rally on DaVe and has a show on NME Radio. Neil's TV appearances include BBC1 Stand up Show, Lenny Beige's Variety Pack (BBC)
Channel 4's The 11 0'Clock Show
ANDREW DOYLE
"Andrew Doyle is one of the funniest, sharpest, cruellest comedians out there. Prepare for all your internal organs to burst with laughter” - The Independent
"A smart cookie in the sarcastic, know-it-all vein of Stewart Lee, but with a style of his own. The performance is assured, perfectly timed and naturally charming” - Chortle
LENNY PETERS
Professional comedian and comedy actor as seen in BBC Life as we know it' and Fifteen Stories high'.
DAN HOY
Hackney Empire Finalist and one liner wizard!
JOE WELLS
“highly original, inspired and suitably different from the rest of the crowd” “brilliantly crafted [jokes]” - Comedy Central
".... a much needed voice against hypocrisy as well as a wonderfully talented stand-up comedian.....The Portsmouth Evening News
NICK WALLIS
BBC Surrey Breakfast show DJ who will be doing a short set in aid of Comic Relief (so please be supportive and gentle with him)
NB: our own annual comic relief night Comedy Cottage will be held at the Harlequin Theatre Fri 18th March.
MC: SAJEELA KERSHI
"all the incidental digressions, ad libbing and sharpness of wit in her Joanna Lumley cut glass vowels will be more than worth it" THE STAGE.
"every fibre of Kershi's act exudes a perverse manic warmth" LA Campus

Music By the Professionals and lovely Soo will be taking care of you at the door.
Show 8pm
Tickets £10
(profits to British Heart Foundation)
for tickets call: 01737 242009

The Ex-Service & Social Club
1 Chartfield Road
Reigate, Surrey
RH2 7JZ

Inside Out, BBC1 South, Mon 7 Feb 2011

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Sat, 12 Feb 2011 00:39:00 +0000

Here is a transcript of the top story on the above programme. To watch it and/or read more about how it came to my attention, please click here.

Transcript follows:

Jon Cuthill [presenter]: As lawyers prepare for a civil action against the Post Office on behalf of village subpostmasters, we've been talking to people across the South accused of cooking the books, but they swear they've done nothing wrong. So what's up behind the counters of our Post Offices?

Nick Wallis reports.

NW: "This Surrey Post Office has a new subpostmaster. The last one, Seema Misra, is behind bars, convicted of false accounting and stealing £74,000. Seema and her husband Davinder [photo below] maintain she didn’t steal the money, but that inexplicable errors in her post office accounts made it look as if she had.

Davinder Misra: “I feel ashamed on this country. They put innocent... into prison. I am a good citizen. My wife always a good citizen. We are good people. She is everything for me. To put her into prison innocent. You're giving the whole family prison."

NW: "What have you told your son about where your wife is?"

DM: "She is in hospital. She... hospital."

NW: "Seema's case is far from isolated. We've come across dozens of examples similar to this. Postmasters who feel they've been victims of a serious injustice. They say they were just trying to serve their community, but when things started going inexplicably wrong, the Post Office have pointed the finger of blame firmly at them."

NW: "There are plenty of services you can get from a Post Office nowadays. It's not just about buying stamps - you can get your tax disc, you can pay your bills online, get your lottery ticket, but all the transactions which take place behind this glass over here, are automatically recorded at a centrally located database. And at the end of the day, what the centrally located database says you have, must match what's in the tills behind the glass."

NW: "Subpostmasters, under their contracts, are personally liable for shortfalls…

Jo Hamilton [photo above] knows this only too well. She used the run this post office in Hampshire but now the Post Office counter has been removed and she’s only left with the village shop. Her troubles began when her Post Office computer terminal showed the money in her till didn’t seem to match her takings."

JH: "I got to the end of the week on a weekly balance and I was £2000 down, so I ran the helpdesk, and they told me to do this, this and this, and the number actually doubled right in front of my eyes, in the space of three minutes. The upshot was I had to pay £4000 which I didn't have, so they took it out of my wages."
NW: "To Jo’s horror the accounting discrepancies continued to pile up. She says she hoped it was just a computer glitch that would correct itself."

JH: “I always thought one day, some kind of electronic wizardry would happen and it would put itself right. But it didn't.

JH: "There were nights... and people will bear me out... there were nights when I just sat there sobbing... cos I just didn't know what to do, how to get out of the mess.

JH: "I had no idea this was happening to other people. I thought I was the only one... and I just felt... absolutely terrified."

NW: "Jo’s mistake was not to challenge the computer’s figures, but to sign them off believing they were wrong. By doing that she was telling the Post Office everything was fine when it wasn’t... which amounts to false accounting.
NW: "Eventually when the losses reached £36,000, she called in the Post Office auditors and the decision was taken to prosecute her. Jo, who says she’s never even had a parking ticket, found herself in court."

Roch Garrard, villager: “The court case was amazing, 'cos we all trooped down to the Crown Court for the hearing. And the judge sort of... looked "what's going on here?" and it was quite clear that nobody there for a moment had thought that Jo had taken any money. But she had to plead guilty to false accounting, for saying the money was there when it wasn't.

RG: "But there was no explanation from the Post Office as to what had happened to this money. They didn't prosecute her for stealing the money. They just prosecuted her for not accounting for the money properly."

NW: "But that unaccounted for money had to be paid back…somehow."

JH: "I had to re-mortgage the house, and we borrrowed £30,000 on that and the village lent me £3000 and gave me £3000 to make up the other six, for which I am very grateful."

NW: "Jo is not alone. Other subpostmasters have got together and have formed a campaign group. And in the next few weeks lawyers representing 55 of them plan to take the first steps in launching a civil action against the Post Office."

NW: "So Amanda, how big is this?"

Amanda Glover, Solicitor, Shoosmiths: “Well, we’re told at the moment that the clients we've got are to some extent the tip of iceberg. We've got 55 people that have already come forward. We’re told there more. We're waiting very much to see what final figure is."

NW: "All of people that you're representing - is there one thing that keeps coming up in your discussions with them?"

AG: "They all seem to be saying that the system has caused them problems....

NW: "The computer system...."

AG: "The computer system. What we’ve found when talking to these individuals is there is a number of issues for some people. When you drill down, they have had problems with training, they've had problems with support of the system, so there are a number of factors, but it all seems to come down to what ultimately is stored in the computer system."

NW: "And you presumably wouldn't do this unless you were absolute certain that they have a case."

AG: "Yes, yes. I think, once you have met these individuals, what you do find is they are all very good citizens. They all come with the same story, they wanted to be part of the community, they're very believable and when you've got such numbers it has to be more than coincidence that this is happening to such a large number right across the country."

NW: "One of those people is David Bristow [photo above]. Soon after he bought his Post Office and village shop, he says his computer terminal began throwing up accounting losses. He called in the Post Office auditors. He says they found that some of the errors were down to him pressing the wrong buttons. But £42,000 of losses couldn’t be explained. He says he was told he was no longer fit to be the subpostmaster.
NW: "Dave what's it like being here, rather than out the back in the Post Office serving your customers?"

David Bristow: "I was suspended and it's just been left like that. Although we have asked the Post Office many many times for info they haven’t been forthcoming and so I am just suspended."

NW: "Can you say honestly, on the record, that you never took any of that money?"

DB: "Yes..."

NW: "You haven‘t been going on holidays abroad...

DB: "No, no, no, no, no, no. There has been a discrepancy that is unexplained. The Post Office do not know how or when or why the discrepancy occurred. They have their records which say there is a discrepancy but I can categorically say I have taken nothing."

NW: "For more than two years David has been in limbo…running the village shop, with someone else running the Post Office counter for him. But at any time the Post Office could close it down."

NW: "As far Post Office are concerned, the only way this can be resolved is for you to pay them £42,000 which they say you owe?"

DB: "Yeah, yeah. If I paid £42,000 to them they would probably just take it and that would be the end of it. But I didn’t take any money. It’s a paper error, it's a computer problem or somebody, somewhere has not processed the information incorrectly, and they cant find it.”

NW: "So this is it…the computer system which so many postmasters see as the root of all their accounting problems. We asked the Post Office a simple question. Is there anything wrong with it? They gave us this statement:"

Post Office: "The Horizon computer system is absolutely accurate and reliable, and has operated successfully in over 11,000 branches for more than 10 years. It has been fully, and robustly tested, and meets the relevant banking industry standards."

NW: "While Jo Hamilton pleaded guilty to false accounting, she says she has never understood what was supposed to have happened to the missing cash."

JH: “Nobody seems to be able to explain it properly and the Post Office never have to provide evidence that you've had any money. It's awful. If you are a law-abiding citizen and all of sudden find yourself in this situation... it’s terrifying."

James Arbuthnot, MP for North East Hampshire: “I am actually very concerned about this, because there are a lot of cases which seem to be cropping up, all round the country.

JA: "The Post Office, has been, I think has been pretty hard-nosed in the way they have taken these cases to court. Now that is pretty tough for these people who have been faced with a new computer system which they have been struggling to master, and I think they need to think again, and be more sympathetic.”

NW: "But the Post Office says sub postmasters are supported. They’re given full training, including onsite supervision, and have access to a dedicated helpline."

NW: "There may well be dishonest subpostmasters just as you come across dishonest people in all walks of life, and of course the Post Office have every right to go after lawbreakers.

NW: "It says it deals with the transactions of 20 million people who visit its branches every week and has a duty to protect all the money in its care.

NW: "But some of those who have been accused of false accounting insist they never stole a penny, but were let down by the system, and didn't get the support they needed.

NW: "Meanwhile, as Davinder waits for his wife Seema Misra to finish her 15 month prison sentence, he faces another crisis. When she's released, they're going to have to figure out how to pay back the £74,000 Seema was found guilty of stealing."

To read more about this story, click here.

50 Buildings uglier than Guildford Cathedral

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Fri, 11 Feb 2011 10:31:00 +0000

Guildford Cathedral is 50 years old this year. There is a special service taking place at Guildford Cathedral this Sunday 13 Feb to mark it.

You can listen to a series of very interesting discussions about Guildfod Cathedral on the Reverend Gavin Ashenden's breakfast show on the morning of Sunday 13 Feb between 6am and 9am.

We touched on a particular complaint the Dean of the Cathedral has with the Borough Council on our breakfast show this morning. A longer version of that interview will go out on Sunday.

For many people Guildford Cathedral is a very difficult building to love.

So this morning, taking into account the age of the building and the rather ambivalent views people have towards it, we invited you to help us put together a list of 50 Buildings Uglier than Guildford Cathedral.

I will try to update this blog with pictures of the offending buildings, but if you want to help make my job easier and send them in, please do so. Furthermore, if you want to add to the list you would be more than welcome!

50 Buildings Uglier than Guildford Cathedral

1) Darren in Farnham: "The Wellington Centre in Aldershot."
2) Callum in Aldershot: "What about Princes Hall in Aldershot?"
3+4) Julia in Guildford: "I hate the Toys R Us in Woking. Also dislike Woking train station."
5+6) Janice in Dorking: "The Gherkin in London and the parliament building in Edinburgh."
7) Jane in Reigate: "Crawley Hospital."
8) Simon in Redhill: "Godalming police station is a concrete carbuncle!"
9)Amanda in Godalming: "And the probation building too. Dreadful!"
10) Anon: "the police station in aldershot! It is an ugly comcrete block."
11) Patrick in Farnham and Emma Bandey: "I put in a vote for the concrete monstrosity that is the Woolmead in Farnham, which could only be improved by the application of several thousand pounds of semtex."
12) Chrissie in Crawley: "The ugly mall, which was allowed to encroach on the serene Memorial Garden in Crawley."
13) Steve Chapman: "The Wahlberg car park in Aldershot. That building fell out of the ugly tree & hit every branch on the way down!"
14+15) Robin Davies: "The shopping centres in Woking and Redhill. At least Guildford Cathedral is unique!"
16) Martin in Cranleigh: "The Friary Centre in Guildford - it should be pulled down, and a brewery built in its place!"
17) Reed: "What about that new ugly copper clad shopping area in Walton?"
18) Colin in Send, Anna in Addlestone and Nigel in St. Johns: "The Lightbox in Woking - Ugly, ugly, blot on the landscape."
19 +20) Suzy White: "Donyngs Leisure Centre in Redhill isn't that pretty. And Tolworth Tower takes some beating."
21+22) Laura Virgoe: Tower in woking centre (Mouchel GP building?),a nd Surrey Towers in Addlestone.
23) Dan from Basingstoke: "All of Basingstoke."

And then we ran out....! Come on, there must be many more ugly buildings than Guildford Cathedral - please feel free to nominate them in the comments box below.

Here are some people defending Guildford Cathedral:

Hannah in Godalming:
"People who think Guildford Cathedral ugly obviously have never been inside! Inside it is a beautiful place of prayer."

Julia in Guildford:
"I love Guildford cathedral. Yes it is different to other cathedrals but what is wrong with being different? We can't keep producing buildings that look the same, the world would be a very dull place. In short, I think it is a stunning example of contemporary architecture - imposing yes but majestic. A crowning glory of Guildford!"

Barbara Kale in Normandy:
"Why is it that nobdody can see past the red brick to the fact that the Cathedral itself is situated way up above the by-pass, the town, the village at the foot, and if you are a believer then closer to the man himself - God.

As a youngster, in or approaching my teens in the early 50's I had the opportunity to contribute, what would seem today to be a minute amount of money, 2/6d, in return for our name on just one brick within the construction of the 'new' Cathedral, and this red brick building stands up there for all to see, those living in Guildford, those passing thro' and those, for whatever reason, have the need to use the Cathedral for a service, celebration or whatever is appropriate in such a building.

I can only assume that those who choose to criticise this elegant bulding will learn to respect it for what it is, and appreciate that it's position up there on the hill must make it a truly unique structure as a Cathedral. If they want 'old/ancient' then they should go into the town, off the High Street, where there are several buildings of great age, albeit squeezed in between shops traffic etc. There is also the Castle with its beautifully maintained grounds - a pleasure to visit and full of 'history'."

and whilst we're on the subject of other buildings, a word of support for the much-maligned Lightbox in Woking from Di in West End:
"Don't judge a book by its cover. Inside the Lightbox you find a lovely airy building, exhibitions, friendly staff and volunteers! "

Thanks to everyone who contributed this morning. It was fun. Have a good weekend.

Want to see a rat running past 10 Downing Street?

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Mon, 17 Jan 2011 09:05:00 +0000

Now you can...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-12204011?utm_source=BBC+News+UK&utm_medium=twitter

Happy New Year!

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 10:25:00 +0000

Thanks to everyone who has kindly taken the time to read this blog or listen to the programme in 2010. It's been a good year for the programme - listening figures have been steadily going up over the past 12 months, but there's still... what's the phrase?... plenty of room for growth!

It's also been my first full calendar year as a breakfast show presenter and I cannot tell you how much I have enjoyed myself. I realise it's a privilege to be able to sit behind a microphone for three hours every weekday to bring you the news, especially from within such an august institution as the BBC.

We are trying to make this radio station, and specifically this show, a central information hub for all things Surrey - getting important local stories to air, holding those in authority to account, making sure you know what's going on at any given moment within the county, and, hopefully, providing a useful window on the wider world.

But (and here's where I start cadging favours), the show is nothing without you. I remain eternally grateful to anyone who has listened over the past year, liked what they heard and stuck around. It's my ambition to start taking a significant chunk of the radio listening audience here in Surrey, but in order to do that, people have to know we exist.

If I could ask you a favour - if you like the show, and you think you know someone who might like it too - tell them! We're not on DAB, but we are on 104FM and 104.6FM and you can find us live on the BBC iplayer here.

If you can persuade someone to give us a try, and they tune in when I'm on air between 7 and 10am on weekday mornings, I'll do my level best to live up to their, and your, expectations.

Have a Happy New Year. I really do hope 2011 brings you the very best that life has to offer, whatever you find yourself doing. And I promise to at least try and write a few more blog posts!

Yours

Nick

School closures in Surrey, Hampshire and West Sussex

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Tue, 30 Nov 2010 11:12:00 +0000

Schools have a duty to notify the county council if they will be closed for any reason. We are assured the information is immediately passed to the relevant council web teams.

This is the Surrey County Council webpage for school closures:

http://www.surreycc.gov.uk/education/schools.nsf/webschoolsbystatusall?openform

This is the Hampshire County Council webpage for school closures:

http://www.hants.gov.uk/education/schoolclosures/

And this is the page for school closures on the West Sussex County Council website:

http://www.westsussex.gov.uk/living/emergencies/current_incidents/school_closures.aspx

Close encounters

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 09:16:00 +0000

I asked for close encounters with exotic animals. Ally sent this in:

Grrr.

The Blitz and the Battle of Britain

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Sat, 20 Nov 2010 22:25:00 +0000

Earlier this year I was privileged to be able to record a number of stories told to me by people who lived through the blitz. Some of those stories can be heard on the BBC Surrey website, and my blog post about the recording of those stories can be read here.

Since those stories were broadcast on BBC Surrey Breakfast, in the second week of September 2010, I have received letters and email correspondence from people who wanted to share their, or their parents' memories of the blitz.

One of the most dramatic stories came after we broadcast Eve Freaks' memories of working at the Vickers factory at Brooklands in Weybridge, when it was bombed by the Luftwaffe on 4 Sep 1940.

Ray Pennock's mother and father worked in the same factory. Ray's mother as a painter and canvasser, and his father Joe in the erecting shop. Ray's father Joe sadly died earlier this year, aged 94. Before he died Joe told Ray what happened to him during the bombing.

Ray wrote down what Joe said, and, two years later, was prompted by the anniversary of the bombing to send in the following transcript. I have edited it slightly for clarity.

Joe's story:

“I had just returned to the air frame I was working on after getting some pencils from Renie (Irene) Colman in the office. Taking half a crown (a coin) out of my pocket I spun it up in the air to decide whether to start working on the top of the plane or the bottom. I never caught it!

The first bomb dropped, it struck one of the large steel presses. The blast went out sideways killing not only Renie but two young lads, Dollymore and Gunner, (I cannot remember their first names) who were due to leave that week and join the Royal Navy.

Lots more bombs exploded but we were the lucky ones, as only the week before chicken wire mesh had been put up under the glass in the roof. The other hangers were still waiting for it to be fitted and lots of the fatal casualties were caused by large pieces of flying glass.

One of my work mates (Frank Drewitt) had his heel blown off, so I took him over to the First Aid Station that was situated in the air raid shelters across Brooklands Road. It was then someone told me that I had blood running down my face from a wound on my head. After being treated I returned to see if I could find my wife but was told to go home as all staff not injured had been sent home.

Half way down Oyster Lane my motor bike ran out of petrol and I pushed it into the Oyster Lane Garage. I asked for some petrol, but I didn't have any coupons or cash, as they were at work in my coat. After a bit of pleading they gave me a pint of petrol and I arrived home to find my wife there uninjured.

I will always remember the cars left in the car park for months, their owners killed in the bombing."

JOSEPH REAY PENNOCK. 1914 - 2010 Written by Ray Pennock (son)

-------------------

In the days after BBC Surrey's September broadcasts, I also received a three page, handwritten letter, sent in by Pauline in Burpham which describes her experiences of living in Cranleigh during World War II.

Here's Pauline's story, again edited for length and clarity.

"In 1940 I was just 5 years old and attended Cranleigh Infants School. I lived with my Mum, sister and brother (Dad was away for most of the war).

I was at school when the air raid siren went. We all walked in a crocodile line (we never ran) to the air raid shelter. I always wanted to be first in because I could go right to the end where it was very dark, and was also quite wet! I was then able to take off my gas mask, which smelt horrid.

The teacher always stayed at the entrance. We used to think it was a lot of fun, not having to stay in the classroom, and it was an opportunity to talk to my best friend Alice!

There was one thing I was worried about and that was the rocking horse which stood in the hallway of the school. I hated leaving 'Rocky' alone.

All the children loved to rush out of the classroom at break-time and have a ride on him. I was certain he was real - his eyes just seemed to follow you around!

Most of the children didn't really have toys so the rocking horse was special.

One Sunday morning, the Air Raid Siren sounded yet again and Mum gathered us children up and put us in the cupboard under the stairs. I remember clearly a bomb falling, but my age stopped me being frightened.

It was quite a while before the All Clear went and when we went outside there was a big cloud of smoke. All the children were looking for the "big hole", and we found an enormous crater in the field behind our houses.

It seems strange now that we were able to stand on the edge looking down - one of the boys even climbed down into the hole.

Unbeknown to us another bomb had fallen on our Infant School and completely destroyed it. When I found out all I could think about was my beloved rocking horse and the little bed I used to sleep in every afternoon at school.

Life after that carried on. We had school lessons under the stage in the Village Hall.

Later in the war we had the dreaded Doodlebugs. I was a little older then, and they did frighten me. You could hear them coming and once the noise stopped the rocket came straight down, so I wanted them to carry on over our house.

Strangely, my childhood was a happy one, and I think most of my friends would say the same. Even so I felt hungry most of the time. We all did - but that changed when my Dad came home and set up the garden with all the vegetables.

Cranleigh hasn't changed much since the war. Many of my schoolfriends still live there and I often see them on Market Day (Thursday), including Alice.

Yours

Pauline in Burpham."

A real live falcon in the studio. Called Alan

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 11:43:00 +0000

So yeah, I'm smiling in that photo, but it was a different story when Alan first came into the studio:

That is one very apprehensive radio presenter and a hungry Gyrfalcon. Called Alan.

What were the owners doing letting a hungry falcon into the studio? Well... I found out today that falcons become less agitated when hungry, and more prone to aggressive behaviour when full.

As the falcon gets hungry it slips into hunting mode, slowing down its movements and focusing its senses, becoming calmer, more watchful and to borrow from sports terminology, "in the zone".

It was quite a privilege to hold such a beautiful natural killing machine on my hand, even though I didn't get the chance to appreciate those moments properly as I was presenting the last five minutes of the show at the same time! If you want to hear want that sounded like on air please go to the BBC Surrey page on the BBC iplayer. (NB The show only stays up for 7 days after transmission)

My thanks to Barry Ryder from Henfold Birds of Prey in Beare Green for bringing Alan in. If you want to hold a falcon on your hand, Barry is your man. He might even tell you why he called him Alan.

Sunny Brar - check out the guns!

noreply@blogger.com (nickwallis) — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 09:30:00 +0000

She's 25 years old, 5 feet 4 inches tall, weighs 9 stone 9lb and once bench-pressed one of her colleagues!

Sunny Brar has now given up her job as an estate agent in Sutton to concentrate on training full time. She hopes to represent Great Britain at weightlifting in the 63kg (that's her maximum alowed weight - she's lifted 80kg before) at London 2012. Sunny is a genuine prospect, has a great name, great biceps and is really good fun. Look out for her.