Beating Ana by Shannon Cutts

Let me say this one more time, that in my own direct, personal experience, there is never, ever, ever any reason to give up hope.

2012-02-14T05:14:00-08:00

Let me say this one more time, that in my own direct, personal experience, there is never, ever, ever any reason to give up hope. You can do better than that. You must do better than that. (-Quote from Beating Ana, Part One: Welcome to Our World)

In all the years I was struggling to get away from Ed and take my life back, I never once met another person who had recovered from an eating disorder.

What I would have given - or so I thought - in those days, to meet living proof that recovery really was possible!

But the truth was that I didn't need proof. I knew it. I knew it like I knew that, if at any point my lungs were deprived of oxygen, I would do whatever it took to breathe air again.

We know recovery is possible. This is why giving up hope feels so terrible. We are lying to ourselves - and we know it.

We have to do better, because we know that we can. Once you admit that you are just scared, that it is just hard and you are tired, you will find fresh strength and courage and commitment to press onward again.

Don't lie to yourself. Don't lie about how hard it is, how exhausted you feel, or even how hopeless Ed makes recovery seem sometimes.

But most of all, don't lie to yourself about what is possible. You won't believe yourself anyway, because you already know the truth.

What can you do - starting today - right now - to tell yourself the truth about what is holding you back in pursuing your recovery goals?

Shannon

So make “contact” with your own potential to access the essential simplicity of recovery

2012-02-07T05:13:00-08:00

So make “contact” with your own potential to access the essential simplicity of recovery. Remind yourself that you have all the right answers, you know the right things to do, and you simply must be patient with yourself as you unlearn old, longstanding, damaging habits and replace them with your newly adopted, healthier choices. (-Quote from "Beating Ana", Part Three: Ed at the Movies)

You can simplify things.

How can you know this?

Because if you weren't capable of breaking the complex down into small, simple, manageable steps, you would never have learned how to walk, to speak, to make your bed.

Each of these tasks, while terribly complex in their entirety, is made up entirely of small, simple, manageable steps.

In fact, studying how to do complex tasks you already know how to do is a great way to learn how to simplify complex tasks you do not yet know how to do.

In this way, as you write down - retroactively - the steps you had to learn to do in order to make a bed, operate a toaster, or blow dry your hair, you can in the same way teach yourself to write down the small, simple steps you need to follow in order to RECOVER.

Right now, what is one task that feels too overwhelmingly complex to ever achieve? Challenge yourself this week to journal out some small, simple, manageable steps you can take towards that big goal.

Shannon

Thom Rutledge on the What's, When's, How's and Who's of ED Recovery Support

2012-02-06T05:51:00-08:00

Jenni Schaefer's former therapist and best-selling Ed butt-kicking author, speaker, and teacher Thom Rutledge is presenting a FREE teleconference workshop for MentorCONNECT on Wed, February 8th. This is such a great opportunity to hear from a master level recovery expert - and Thom is donating his time to do this for us!

So I just wanted to invite you - all you have to do is RSVP to http://thomrutledge.eventbrite.com/ to reserve your spot (and we also podcast these events on iTunes in case you can't stay for the whole event).

Here's the 411 - hope to see you there!

Shannon

Title: The What’s, When’s, How’s and Who’s of Ed Recovery Support

Event Description: In this teleconference, Thom will be joined by Jeanette Henriques (on the MentorCONNECT Board of Directors) and Cheryl Kerrigan (author of Telling ED NO!), & his retreat co- facilitator, Julie Merryman, to talk the essential role that developing a quality support system plays in any solid recovery plan. If you have experienced any hesitation about connecting with support, if you have difficulty knowing what kind of support you need and/or if you have trouble knowing who to trust as support, please join us.

Time with these four is always well spent: extremely helpful in the most practical ways and always fun. As Thom always says:

No one, which means no one, can recover alone. And you are not the exception to this rule.

When: Wednesday, February 8, 2012
What time: 8:00 - 9:15 p.m. Central Time
RSVP to: http://mentorconnect.eventbrite.com

RSVP now to reserve your space for this amazing FREE recovery event!

Presenter Bio: Thom Rutledge is the author of several books, including Embracing Fear: How to Turn What Scares Us into Our Greatest Gift. His INTRApersonal Therapy methods are used extensively by outpatient and residential eating disorder treatment programs in the U.S. and Australia

** Thomʼs next retreat is scheduled for March 9-12, 2012. For information, email thomrutledge@earthlink.net. **

FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THOM & HIS WORK: www.nutshellwisdom.com and/or join Thom on Facebook

This event is sponsored by MentorCONNECT, a registered (c)3 nonprofit organization. To learn more visit us at: www.mentorconnect-ed.org

Yes YOU Can

2012-01-31T14:13:00-08:00

The January issue of Good News for Eating Disorders Recovery is now available, and I wanted to share this month's inspiring message with you here as well! Hope you enjoy it! :-)

Yes, YOU Can

I have so many people in my life that I admire.

Some of them I have met or corresponded with, and others I never will.

I love looking up to others, being inspired by their example, feeling grateful for their lives.

But this can trip me up, when I forget that the reason I can feel admiration for them is because of something in me that resonates with what they have achieved and who they are.

(My mentor, Lynn, reminds me of this all the time, but I still very easily forget!)

So, as we launch into a whole new year together, it seems like a particularly ideal time to remind you as well that yes, YOU can.

You can do that amazing thing that you have been admiring another person for.

You can scale that cliff, mend that fence, even work that miracle.

As you are watching me for inspiration, I am also watching you. We get there together. We will celebrate together.

And I for one can't wait! Happy New Year! :-)

With great respect and love,

xo
Shannon

To read the full edition click HERE

To subscribe to Good News, click HERE

You must simply set your mind and heart and spirit to do whatever it takes

2012-01-31T04:44:00-08:00

You must simply set your mind and heart and spirit to do whatever it takes to get better and never ever give up. (-Quote from "Beating Ana", "Welcome to Our World")

Sometimes we think we can get by with half measures.

And sometimes we think we have to earn a gold star on everything, all at once, and right away.

At either extreme, what we will find is Ed. Patiently waiting.

Ed is VERY patient. This is because he knows what the grand prize is - us - and he is quite willing to do whatever it takes to win our life for himself.

Are we?

"Whatever it takes" doesn't mean whatever we feel like doing. Or whatever isn't too difficult or too inconvenient. Or whatever our pro-ed buddies don't object to.

Or whatever doesn't interfere with Ed's plans for us.

Whatever it takes means whatever it takes.

It means doing the things that feel impossible. The things we are sure will take forever and more time than even we've got.

The things that will require us to change everything - and that means EVERYTHING - in order to achieve them.

The things we promised ourselves we would never do, told ourselves we could never do, and are absolutely certain cannot be done.

THOSE things are the things we must set our mind and heart and spirit to do....IF we want to get free from Ed for good.

What can you do - starting right now, today - to do whatever it takes to heal?

You must try

2012-01-24T06:29:00-08:00

I know it’s hard to do this work, to rally enough to even make the attempt, when you feel worthless, ugly, unlovable, and all those feelings I also used to feel. But you must try. When I first started to heal, my motivation had nothing to do with feeling worthy of it. But I saw there were other people around me, fat people, thin people, rich people, poor people, old people, young people—who lived with much more happiness and joy than I did. So I started to believe it was possible for me to change too and be more like them—happier, more alive. (-Quote from "Beating Ana", Chapter: The Mirror Has Two Faces)

What we focus on we see more of. Over time, we may see only that and nothing else.

If we are not happy living life as we are experiencing it, then we may either surround ourselves with other people who are unhappy, or we may decide to invite people who are happy with their lives into our lives to help us make changes.

Here, the goal in inviting a life makeover expert (aka a mentor) into our lives is not to give us more of what we've already got, but to help us experience what we have become cut off from within ourselves.

For instance, if we have a hard time experiencing ourselves as smart, a mentor can help with that. If we have a hard time seeing physical beauty in our own reflection, a mentor can encourage us in this area as well and point out areas where we are truly beautiful but just have a difficult time seeing it.

However, if we choose our mentor poorly, we may find that our negative beliefs and vision of ourselves and our life simply gets reinforced (hint: this is Ed's specialty).

So choosing who your mentors are is very, very important.

Who do you notice around you who inspires you to believe that if they could change their lives, then maybe you can too? How much time in an average day do you spend contemplating their transformation - how much work it must have taken, how many people may have supported them, and how you might follow in their footsteps?

What can you do - today, this week - to learn more about how the people you admire transformed their lives, so that you might begin to follow in their footsteps?

Shannon

When you meet you, you will no longer want Ed

2012-01-17T07:51:00-08:00

As you meet, accept, and respect your own story in progress, your power to change your life and the lives of those who follow hopefully in your footsteps will ignite, light, and transform the path of recovery for us all. (-Quote from "Beating Ana", Chapter 8 Mile)

Ed sure does enjoy your company.

He enjoys it so much that he does his best to make sure you will never have any time to enjoy your own company.

While Ed might not like it when you start to demand more time away from him so you can hang out with yourself, it is necessary if you ever want to increase your power to change your life and get Ed OUT of it.

So you may have to be sneaky at first - stealing little moments away from Ed that he is too stupid or distracted to notice.

Or you may have to turn the tables on Ed, throwing up smokescreens so that he thinks you are spending time together, when really you are just working on your recovery right under Ed's nose.

What can you do - starting right now - to gain more minutes in your day to spend with you at Ed's expense?

Shannon

Curvy Icon Chenese Lewis Shares How to Love Your Body and Yourself

2012-01-10T14:46:24-08:00

I just wanted to invite you to a free teleconference event with one of the most inspiring women I know - Chenese Lewis. Chenese is perhaps most recognized for her photo shoot in the buff with America's Next Top Model Season 10 Winner Whitney Thompson, and is also the spokesperson for the Binge Eating Disorder Association (BEDA) and the creator of Hollywood NOW's Annual "Love Your Body Day". We can all learn from Chenese's inspiring story of choosing to love her curvy and beautiful body no matter what body type society says is "in".

Please join us!

MentorCONNECT Presents....Chenese Lewis!

Event Title: Learning to Love Your Body - and Yourself!

Event Description: Chenese Lewis has grown up in the "thin is in" culture that surrounds us all - and yet somehow seems to be immune to its messages of low self-esteem, poor body image, and holding back from life due to how you look. She is bold, beautiful, and curvy - and attributes her success in the notoriously image-conscious fields of modeling and acting to her ability to love her body - and herself - no matter what anyone else says.

Tune in and learn how Chenese does it - and how you can follow in her footsteps to embrace your body - and your life - just as you are!

When: Wednesday, January 11, 2012
What time: 8:00 - 9:15 p.m. Central Time
RSVP to: http://mentorconnect.eventbrite.com

More info about Chenese: www.cheneselewis.com

Your voice—your true voice—is always genuinely compassionate and kind.

2012-01-10T05:17:00-08:00

Your voice—your true voice—is always genuinely compassionate and kind. Your real inner voice always gives you the benefit of the doubt and a chance to learn and grow from areas in your life that are distressing to you. (-Quote from "Beating Ana", Chapter: Donnie Brasco)

As you are working towards your recovery goals, where do you feel your main stumbling blocks are?

In answering this question, are you tempted to look first - and only - outside of yourself for answers?

"Oh, it's Ed. He's holding me up." "It's because my family has lost faith in me." "It is because I haven't found the right treatment center."

But what if the reason - the ONLY reason - is how YOU treat YOU?

What if, just once, you listened to your real inner voice - the kind and compassionate one - instead of to Ed, or to the fake judging voice Ed has been teaching you to address yourself with?

How might your recovery progress change?

Shannon

If you must have a reputation, what better than to be known as an overcomer? No longer a victim, but strong, powerful, wise.

2012-01-03T04:34:00-08:00

If you must have a reputation, what better than to be known as an overcomer? No longer a victim, but strong, powerful, wise. No longer an object of pity and scorn to yourself and others, but an icon of respect, a conquering hero returning to your hometown in victory. And if you must have friends, what better than to cultivate friends who are just like you—victorious fighters! -Quote from "Beating Ana", Chapter: 8 Mile)

Whatever you tell other people about yourself, they will be believe you.

So will you.

So will Ed.

If you tell others you are a victim, if you tell yourself you are a victim, if you tell Ed you are a victim, you will be believed.

But if you tell others, yourself, and Ed that you are strong, powerful, wise, a fighter, and a HERO, you will be believed.

What reputation will you awaken with today? What reputation will lay down with you tonight in sleep? Who will Ed greet tomorrow - a victim, or an OVERCOMER?

Shannon